Chapter Text
It is raining again. Just like it did the day when it all ended. And how did that exactly happen, you might ask? They don’t know. It is just like when you can never tell when it is going to rain until the sun gets concealed with grey clouds all of a sudden. When it all seemed to be glistening with rays. That’s how it all happened. Very sudden. All it took was a pile of grey fog and a flooding sky, to tear them apart and reunite them once again.
Mikasa sat on the chair of her balcony, watched as each droplet hit the metal border, and heard the sound of each droplet as it hit the rooftop, but she remained dry and warm very much, hence the whole purpose of a rooftop.
September in Seoul is painted in dark shades of red and orange, some gray scattered every now and then when it would rain, lots of blues and few yellows from the sky, and purples as the night would come, bringing to life any other color possible from the street lights and busy streets. Seoul never falls asleep.
She brought the mug closer to her lips, sipping onto her latte that she just spent a little too much time making. “It is therapeutic!” She would always say whenever he asked her why it took her so long.
And just like that, he is in her head again. All it took was the acknowledgment of her coffee, and she was back to the melancholy of it all.
It is always at random times of the day. When she would be doing the most niche, basic, random thing, and boom! he is there, like he has never left in the first place. And maybe he never did. Maybe it was she who did. Or neither. Either way, he is gone and she should accept it. It is getting exhausting, he is a little too comfortable in whatever part of her brain he is currently in right now.
As she was about to take another sip, her phone lit up, following with a ringtone.
“Get ready, I’m taking you out.” Spoke Annie as soon as she picked up the phone, sparing her the ‘hello, how are you?’.
“Anns, it is raining, do you want to get sick?”
“Mikasa, you and I both know well that you are sitting on your balcony right now, drinking your coffee, and probably reading a book.”
“No book, just my thoughts.” That sounded a little less dramatic in her head.
“Exactly, even worse. I am to save you from those thoughts that are most probably flooded by him.”
“It is not Ere-“, she stopped herself before saying his name.
Rule number one, never speak of his name once he is no longer present in your life. That way it is easier to forget. Well, at least that’s what she likes to think.
“It is not about him.”
“Yeah, you keep telling yourself that. Anyways, I’m almost there. Get your ass out of the freezing metal chair and get dressed. Wear warm, and grab an umbrella, love you!”
“Why would I need an umbrel- '' and she has already declined the call before she could finish her question.
He honestly thought there were much more important things for Armin to care about than his best friend’s current state. It is not like he was responsible for his feelings, although he is partially guilty, but Eren promised himself he was not going to drag him into his mess, he knew there was a price to pay, he just didn’t know the price would be… well, this. Whatever this conviction is. Everything swept up underneath his feet like an incoming tide, and all he feels is the damp sand beneath his heels and the cold water reaching his ankles, it is so-called that it burns but it is okay. The burn is okay. And so is whatever he is feeling. Or at least, that is what he keeps telling himself. Words of affirmation. Fake it till you make it. Right?
And why did he not go up to her apartment that day? Why did his legs refuse to move and stayed glued to the cement of that godforsaken park? Why did his fingers act numb when he could have just given her a call? Begged her on his knees if he had to, wait if she asked for it, as long as she was aware that he tried, that he wanted. Just as much as she did, maybe even more, maybe she didn’t want it at all.
Eren was angry. He was angry at Armin and Annie, at Jean and Marco, at Sasha and Niccolo, Historia and Ymir. Himself. He was fuming. They were the reason why he met her in the first place. Set them up for the sake of not feeling left out. (When he protested and asked about Connie, they said Connie is too emotionally constipated to even pretend to have a partner. Connie defended himself by suggesting bringing one of his hookups, to which everyone in the room gave him the most disgusted look.) “ This is our wedding week, we are celebrating love, and we want you to have someone too. Your parents will be there too and I know they have been bugging you about ‘settling down. I promise she is the sweetest person you will ever meet. She is smart and intelligent and obviously beautiful, but that’s beside the point. Please just do it for me. For Annie. Just for a week. Nothing more. That’s all I’m asking for.” Armin pleaded, and who was Eren to say no to him. It was his best friend getting married, he had to remind himself. It was not his place to throw a fuss and be selfish, not this time. It was not about him. And he owes him a lot. For putting up with his stubborn ass.
And it was all true. All the things Armin said about her to him were true. She was smart and beautiful and sweet, intelligent, kind, soft, shy and quiet but in the cutest way possible, and also very outgoing and likes to talk about things she is passionate about, that’s when it is hard for her to shut up but Eren would never dare to do that. How she timidly smiled at him the day they met at the airport, and Eren was gone. He was fucked. Utterly, completely fucked. And the funny part was that she hadn’t even spoken to him by the time he had already realized that he was doomed, absolutely whipped.
“Hi,” she spoke, her voice soft, tender, almost honey-like. And god, her eyes. Yup, Eren was fucked.
“Hi,” Eren waved at her shyly. Yes. Eren Jaeger. Waved at her. Shyly. And smiled. Armin teased him about this for the rest of the flight. To his displeased ass, he did end up sitting next to him, throughout all 8 hours, which he normally wouldn’t mind but he could have spent those 8 hours sitting next to her . God, he didn’t even know her name.
“What’s her name?”
“Whose?”
“Don’t play dumb.”
Armin let out a laugh, taking a quick look at her and his fiancee completely dozed off, Annie’s head rested on her shoulders, both of their mouths wide agape. He should have taken a picture back then.
“Mika.” He says, a smile lingering on his lips.
“Mika? Just Mika?”
“Well, it’s Mikasa, we just call her Mika.”
Mikasa
“I’m taking you out.” Armin dragged the blanket off him, opened the blinds wide open and Eren squinched his eyes, expecting the sun to hit right in his eyes, but instead, all he saw were tiny droplets of water gliding down the window glass. He hasn’t gone out much these days. So it is not like he was sure it would be sunny. Besides, it was 8 pm, of course, the sun would have been down by now. And it is September.
“I’m not going anywhere.” He mumbled, bringing the blanket up to his face now, practically burying himself under it.
“Oh, I am not pitying your ass here. And it is not a question. You are going. Even in these filthy clothes.”
“What’s wrong with my clothes?” He murmured under the blanket, only his eyes peeking through.
“Have you seen yourself? When was the last time you looked in the mirror?”
“Ugh, Armin for fuck’s sake, leave me alone!”
“Yeah, so you keep rotting in your own bacteria and sweat, fuck no.” He reached for the blanket once again but Eren was quick enough to hold it tight, “A child,” Armin greeted his teeth, letting go of the fabric, knowing it was no use, “That’s who you are! You have 10 minutes, shower, and look more like a human and less like a walking STI. And grab an umbrella. I’m in the kitchen.” And with that, he slaps the door closed.
Armin is mad. And one thing Eren doesn’t want to see is an even madder Armin, which is close to the surface if he doesn’t move his ass in the next 3 seconds, and so he does. Immediately longing for his bed, warmth. But that wasn’t the type of warmth he wished for anyways.
15 minutes later, they left his apartment. And Eren swears, the rain can’t be good. It wasn’t the last time. It won’t be now.
Mikasa wasn’t quite sure how she agreed to the whole plan. She suspects Annie made her do all the soju shots on purpose. She knew getting her drunk would make everything easier. It is not like Mikasa knows how to say no, it is just her drunken state made everything faster, she wasn’t under the condition to think everything through, ask about hundred questions, play with Annie’s nerves and patience, which she has not been having a lot of ever since all the wedding planning. And the next thing she knew she was on a plane to Italy. To pretend and be infatuated with a random guy that apparently was super tall and hot. That’s how Annie described him, and too drunk Mikasa, it sounded like the perfect package. And he was indeed hot and tall. And so much more.
It all happened in August. In Italy. For Armin’s and Annie’s wedding week. And who would have thought that 7 days in Italy with a complete stranger would turn her life upside down?
First, it was the shared room. They requested for the room to have two separate beds, but Google Translator had something against that, and all they were left with was a king-size bed and a couch, that only Mikasa could fit in if she tried.
“I’ll sleep on the couch.” Said Eren, locking the door, apparently 4 star hotels in Europe were not safe at night, so locking it was the only way to stay alive.
The plan was to spend 4 days in Rome and then spend the rest 3 in Portofino, where the wedding will be. There they have already booked a villa, so they will no longer need to share a bed, let alone a room. It was just 4 days. They could do it. Right?
“You won’t fit in there.” She said a smile on her and Eren forgets to blink for a second. It is those grey eyes of hers.
“Ugh, right yeah.” He scratched his neck, realizing that he will indeed not fit in there. “We can request an extra bed.” He suggests, to which she agrees. Only to find out that they only provide extra beds for couples with children.
“Honestly, what kind of a shithole instead of a hotel did Armin book?” He mumbled under his breath in distress, thinking she wouldn't hear him, but she did and she laughed at that.
“It is okay, we will just share it. There is no other choice is there?” She says, opening the balcony. It was already dark, and the city lights were glistening.
“Right,” he sighs, “Will you be okay with it?” He asks her, and her eyes are already on him and suddenly he feels like burning. His cheeks are burning.
Eren Jaeger is blushing. He is fucking blushing.
“Yeah,” Mikasa nods, “I don’t know why but,” She steps outside to the balcony, removing her gaze from him, “I trust you.”
So they decide on ordering room service because it’s past midnight and they both lack the desire to go and search for the nearest restaurant or at least a supermarket. Eren orders pasta and Mikasa settles for a burger with fries.
“You are actually going to order a burger when you are in Italy?”
“Shush, you can never go wrong with a burger. And besides, I really wanted fries and they don’t serve fries separately for some reason.”
“You should try their coffee tomorrow morning, I know a bakery close by.”
“You have been here before?” She asks him, trying to keep him distracted from looking at her while she is struggling to bite on the burger, it’s too big.
“Mhm, lived here actually, for college.”
“Wow, must be nice.” She still can’t bite it.
“Mhm.”
“What major?” Another question to distract him.
“Art.”
“Oh,” She nods in surprise, finally able to take her first bite, while Eren is almost halfway through his pasta. “Why did you come back?”
“As much as I loved it here, it was not Seoul. I grew up there. And besides, I could always come back.”
“And you did.”
“Yup.” He takes a sip from the glass of water before he speaks again. “So, what do you do?”
“I work at a publishing company.”
“You love reading that much?”
“You cannot even begin to imagine how much.”
He chuckles.
This is nice.
“English lit major then?”
“Yes. I actually did my bachelor’s in sociology in Seoul. And then did my masters in the UK.”
And so the conversation shifts from majors to hobbies to what movies they love to what scares them the most.
And Eren was pretty sure right there and then that he was falling. Falling hard. And there was no stopping it.
The night ends with both of them laying on the bed, both keeping their distance and respecting each other’s personal space. At least the bed was big enough.
“Eren.” She speaks and Eren melts at how she says it, soft and tender, to the point he forgets to ask how she knows his name, since he doesn’t remember introducing himself, but that’s not important right now. “Will you go to that bakery tomorrow with me?”
And Eren has the urge to reach and cup her cheeks, dust feathery kisses across her face, hair, neck, and the corners of her cherry lips. Hold her hand and just stay there like that, because she looks so beautiful. The moonlight shines directly in her grey orbs and he swears he sees another world in them. But he doesn’t do any of those things. He reminds himself that this is just temporary. That she will be gone in 7 days and he will never see her again. Instead, he simply says, “Sure.” And offers her a small smile, and she returns one back.
They stay quiet for some time and Mikasa thinks this is the first time when she doesn’t feel obliged to start a conversation when it is awfully silent. It is comforting. Instead, she slowly turns her back to him, her hand resting under the pillow. “Good night, Eren.” She whispers almost, unsure if he is still awake.
“Good Night, Mikasa.” He says a moment after.
She doesn’t ask him how he got her name either.