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A yelp could be heard coming from Xie Lian’s room. Shi Qingxuan leapt off the couch and busted through the door to his room to find Xie Lian sitting on his bed, eyes agape with a hand covering his mouth.
“Xie Lian?!” She ran up to sit next to him “A-Lian what’s wrong are you ok?!”
Xie lian slowly took a deep shaky breath before answering. “Ok. So remember how I told you a few months ago I got in touch with an old friend?”
Shi Qing nodded and Xie Lian continued.
“Ok well he was San Lang and we were friends in middle school but then he suddenly disappeared, but he texted me again like 2 months ago and we’ve been talking since.
“About a week ago he called me when he was really drunk and basically confessed that he’s liked me since middle school. And I kind of had the biggest crush on him in middle school as well so we’ve kind of been dating since last week.”
Shi Qingxuan gasped, “that’s great A-Lian!! Wait, then what’s wrong?”
“Ok well.. since I haven’t seen his face I asked him to send me a pic and-“ Xie Lian’s sentence got cut off by Shi Qingxuan gasping again.
“HE SENT YOU A DICK PIC DIDNT HE?! I SWEAR TO GOD IF-“
“No No!!” Xie Lian cut her off, “no dick pic he sent a photo of his face!”
Now Shi Qingxuan was confused, “then what’s wrong?”
Xie Lian groaned and buried his face in his hands, something he did when he was embarrassed, “he’s so fricking hot!”
Shi Qingxuan bust out laughing, “Weren’t you friends in middle school?! Don’t you remember what he looks like!”
Xie Lian groaned again, “that’s the thing! He looks completely different now! In middle school he was some sweet cute little boy with a baby face that was always shorter then me. Now! Now! He looks so- Ughh I can’t explain it.”
Shi Qingxuan bursts out laughing again.
“It’s not funny Qingxuan!” Xie Lian grabs his phone to look at the photo San Lang sent again, “puberty hit him like a fricking bus because that is not that San Lang I remember!”
Shi Qingxuan leans forward to look at the picture too, but then she grabs to phone out of Xie Lian’s hand to inspect it further, “that’s because it’s not San Lang! This is Hua Cheng! Xie Lian your getting catfished!”
“What do you mean?” Xie Lian taking his phone back.
“That’s literally Hua Cheng, it’s a photo from his Instagram, look it up. Who ever this San Lang person is he’s definitely catfishing you because that’s not him.” Shi Qingxuan explains.
“But he is Hua Cheng. San Lang is just a nickname.”
“Ok.. well that’s still not that Hua Cheng, it’s literally a photo from his Instagram. Show me a photo of San Lang as a kid.”
Xie Lian scrolls through his camera roll before finally finding a photo, “here” he says handing the phone to Shi Qingxuan.
She examines the picture and let’s out an “ahh.” “Look here,” she hands the phone back to Xie Lian and zooms in on the image “San Langs right eye is black, but I Hua Cheng wears an eyepatch and I hear he has heterochromia.”
Xie Lian stares at the picture and then back at his friend, “so you think San Lang.. is catfishing me..?”
“He definitely is! He has to be!”
Xie Lian frowns and starts typing, “I’ll ask him for another picture..”
Almost instantly he gets a reply.
San Lang! <33
Can you send me another photo please?
-Of course
[a photo of Hua Cheng
smiling in front of a mirror]
-That good? Or do you
want more? ;))
That’s fine thank you San Lang! Your very handsome! <3
(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)
Shi Qingxuan ‘tsked’ and folded her arms across her chest, “I’m telling you Xie Lian, this guys a catfish!”
___________
“Qingxuan! Qingxuan!” About a week later Xie Lian bursts into Shi Qingxuan’s room with his phone in his hand, “look at this! San Lang sent another photo!”
Shi Qingxuan sits up on her back and reaches for Xie Lian’s phone which he hands to her. “Hmmm” she says while examining the picture that San Lang sent.
She sighed, “Xie Lian this is a photo of a cat.”
Xie Lian grabs the phone back, “yes but this is a photo of Hua Chengs cat. And look-“ he zooms into the photo “-you can see his reflection in the laptop screen!”
Shi Qingxuan “hmmm”‘s again. “He could have just found that on the internet, it’s easy to find all kinds of photos of celebrities now a days.”
Xie Lian groans, “it’s him I’m telling you!”
“Tell me when you meet him! Where is he!”
“Oh well um.. he’s busy right now, and not in the country.. but he’s gonna visit me soon!”
“Sure sure sure. Don’t come crying to me though when San Lang isn’t Hua Cheng but some little nerdy guy going, ‘ sorry I lied to you do you still like me?’“ Shi Qingxuan mocked.
__________
“I feel bad for him” Shi Qingxuan told He Xuan, “he’s such a nice guy and now he’s getting catfished! He poor guy thinks that it’s real, he doesn’t know he’s being catfished!”
He Xuan took another bite of his sandwich and spoke with a mouthful, “man I feel bad for Xie Lian.”
Shi Qingxuan giggles, “chew your food first I’m not going anywhere.”
He Xuan swallowed his food this time before speaking, “what’s this guys name?”
“San Lang, he was friends with Xie Lian in middle school. Oh and get this,” Shi Qingxuan lowered her voice just the smallest bit to avoid anyone eavesdropping on them, “, he’s trying to catfish him with photos of Hua Cheng”
“Shit Like that actor guy?” He Xuan asked
Shi Qingxuan nodded, “and the first photo he sent was straight from his Instagram!”
He Xuan sputtered in disbelief, “is he trying to get caught?!”
“That’s what I’m saying!!”
_________
“-and get this Qingxuan! San Lang said he can come visit next month!” Xie Lian spoke excitingly about his San Lang.
Shi Qingxuan forced a smile, “that’s great Xie Lian.. but aren’t you at all worried that he actually is a catfish?”
Xie Lian let out a soft laugh, “I’d be more worried if it actually was Hau Cheng. Imagine me dating a celebrity. I mean, I know that it is Hua Cheng, just seeing him in person is going to be so much different.”
“So you still believe it’s Hau Cheng?”
“I know it’s Hua Cheng.”
Shi Qingxuan sighed, “so when’s he coming?”
“Oh I’m not sure yet. But hopefully some time next month!”
_________
Shi Qingxuan was exhausted. She was coming home from work and all she wanted to do was lay in bed. Or maybe watch a movie with Xie Lian.
“Fuck” she muttered as she dropped her keys right by the door, however she didn’t need her keys because the door was already unlocked. ‘Xie Lian must be home’ she thought while walking into the house.
Shi Qingxuan dropped her purse in pure shock.
Xie Lian was sitting on the table (that was facing the door so she could see his face clearly) with a tall man standing in between his legs kissing his neck. Xie Lian’s eyes widened when he saw Shi Qingxuan standing at the door.
Xie Lian started tapping the man’s shoulder as if to tell him to stop sucking on his neck. “San Lang san Lang!” He squeaked out.
Shi Qingxuan couldn’t see the man’s face but all she could see was him lifting his head up to kiss Xie Lian’s lips.
“San Lang!” Xie Lian was slightly nudging the man’s shoulders.
“Hm?” Was all he said.
“There’s someone here!”
“What?” The man questioned.
Shi Qingxuan cleared her throat, “um hello.”
Ok, not the best place to meet your best friend/roommates boyfriend who’s definitely a catfish but that’s ok, if they ended up in this situation that means Xie Lian doesn’t mind him being a catfish.
“I’m Xie Lian’s roommate.” Shi Qingxuan smiled softly although she knew the man couldn’t see her.
“Gege, you said she’d be out at work?” Said the man.
“And you said you wouldn’t come till next month.” Xie Lian pointed out with a smirk on his face.
The man chuckled, “I wanted to surprise you.”
Xie Lian laughed. “Oh my god, Qingxuan you do not know how scared I was seeing him at my door. I was definitely not expecting him so that was definitely a nice surprise.”
Shi Qingxuan laughed as well. Now she was dying to know what the man looked like!
Xie Lian cleared his throat, “ahem. Um San Lang could you move.. so that I could get off the table?”
“Oh of course.” The man moved out of between Xie Lian’s legs and Xie Lian hopped off the table.
If Shi Qingxuan had another bag she would have dropped it again because she was definitely shocked!
The man that was just kissing Xie Lian was Hua Cheng!! Not a catfish at all!! The real Hua Cheng!!!