Chapter Text
Road Trip
Beijing’s heat was different from back home. So much more humid. Plus, Nick’s body still expected July to be cooler and pleasant, not the hottest month of the year. He was sweating buckets as he tried to convince overworked white collar types to snap and slash their bosses’ tires.
He was out of it from the heat enough that he didn’t check who was calling as he answered his phone.
“Hello?”
“Hello?” a softly German accented voice replied. “Do I have the wrong number?”
“Oh! Axel!” Nick said, fumbling for a moment, not sure what to do… “Sorry, Nico forgot her phone at my place. I was going to meet her after work.”
That was believable, right?
“Ah. Well… maybe it is better to have gotten you anyhow. Since things—well, you probably heard,” Axel replied.
“I did, yes. So, why are you calling?” Nick asked.
“Uh, well… Tom and I got separated when I was supposed to cover for a friend in Shanghai and I got on the wrong train. And… um… one thing led to another and I’m in rural Qinghai right now,” Axel explained.
“Huh,” Nick replied, nodding.
He’d known Axel got lost easy, but that was… impressively lost.
“I… I don’t think I could get back on my own. I was lucky a local family found me out in the plateau…” Axel said. “I was not wearing hiking boots.”
Nick stared at the passing traffic for a moment, processing that. “Ok. Ok. Where are you specifically?”
Axel shouted the question, and there was a muffled response from a female voice.
“Zhòuquánxiāng,” Axel replied. “A bit south of Bayan Har Shan.”
Nick asked for the spelling, his skill in hanzi still not quite perfect, but he agreed to help. Mostly because it gave him an excuse to get out of the city. The Tibetan plateau would be less of a sauna than Beijing. Plugging the name into his phone and digging around for weather reports nearby, he saw Yushu City had a high of 21C. It sounded like just the winter July weather he was missing.
He’d gone back to his apartment and gotten a decent chunk of the way into packing before beginning to wonder if it was a good idea to go alone. He got by in Beijing fine, sure, but he still had to rely on people understanding English from time to time. Plus, they probably had strong accents way out in the backcountry. Even if they understood him, he might not understand them. Weren’t some forms of Chinese basically distinct languages? He wasn’t sure which areas were, but he didn’t like the idea of finding out the hard way.
After a moment of hesitation, not wanting to admit he’d need help, he gave in and popped over to Neil’s. Slipping out in a closet, he stepped out to find Neil and Damao chatting and eating noodles.
“Yo Nini, is Lynn around?” he said as he strolled over to the table.
“He should be home soon, why?” Neil asked.
“I need to head to Qinghai for something. I figured I might need Lynn’s linguistics skills to help me out,” Nick replied.
“Qinghai? I think there’s a lot of Mongolian speakers out there,” Damao said, pausing from eating his noodles. “I’d be happy to go with, to help out. And get out of this muggy heat.”
“You speak Mongolian?” Nick and Neil both asked.
“Yes?” Damao replied. “I mean, I’m better at Buryat, but they’re related and I can get by in Mongolian.”
“Huh. Well, if you can swing the time off work, I’d appreciate the help,” Nick said, after a moment of weighing the options.
“Can I come too?” Neil asked.
Nick stared at his little brother. “Have you been taking secret lessons in Tibetan or something?”
Neil deflated a little, at that, eyes dropping to study his soup. “No… I just thought it would be nice to get out of the city… see more of the country.”
“Alright, alright,” Nick replied, not liking to see his baby brother so defeated. “But you’re pitching in extra for gas and food.”
Neil lit up in an instant, all smiles and thank yous. The young demon scurried off to his room to start packing, so Nick slurped down his unattended noodles. Damao judged him slightly, but he didn’t mind. He then headed over to the freezer, to hunt for any ice cream, when Lynn arrived home.
“Ah! Just the angel I wanted to see!” Nick called out from the kitchen, fishing out a popsicle.
Lynn stared at him, looking less thrilled to see him than Nick felt was appropriate. “What are you up to now?”
“I’ve got to help out a friend who’s in Qinghai. Since there’s probably all sorts of weird dialects on the way and you’re a linguist, I was thinking you’d be good company,” Nick replied, all smiles.
Lynn stayed quiet, watching him.
“It’d just be a couple days. Head out, pick him up, head home,” Nick explained.
Lynn took his umbrella out of his bag and hung it up, still not saying anything.
“We’ll be near Yushu City. I looked up the weather, and it’s not supposed to break 22C all week,” Nick added.
“22…” Lynn whispered, a soft smile on his face. “I suppose I wouldn’t mind some fresh air and cool weather.”
-b-
Nick yawned the next morning as he walked over to the other apartment building, a duffle bag over one shoulder. He saw the other three standing together, Lynn checking his watch.
“Did you call a cab already?” he asked, shifting his bag’s strap.
“I called an acquaintance who knows the area,” Lynn replied. “He’s picking us up. He should have been here a few minutes ago, though… and you should have been here ten minutes ago.”
“Sorry. Not used to being up this early,” Nick replied, yawning again.
He heard a grunt of agreement from Damao and was glad to not be alone in struggling right now. Lynn looked unimpressed with either of them, though. Then there was Neil, who seemed like he was having a sugar rush. Or like a kid in a movie on Christmas morning.
Nick decided to keep Damao between him and Neil, as a buffer against conversation this early in the morning. It was better to let Lynn take the brunt of Nini’s excitement as he rambled about all the wildlife they could apparently expect to meet on the trip. Nick was ready to make a sarcastic remark about the fact they’d be in a car most of the trip when a minibus that looked like it had driven across the country more than once pulled up.
The occupants were an interesting pair, one was a white haired fox girl, who hopped out of the driver’s seat with a smile. The other was a Chinese dragon in a semi human form who looked like he was going to be sick.
“Hey! Sorry, Ao Lie was going to drive here, but then he chickened out,” the fox girl said.
“I didn’t realise how big of a vehicle it was,” the dragon moaned, though he seemed to slowly be shifting from a nauseous green to white. “I’m not used to driving something this big…”
“A dragon and a nine tailed Chinese fox! So cool!” Neil said, excitement in his voice. “Are you both travelling with us?”
“Nah, nah. I’ve got work,” the fox girl said. “Take care of Lie Lie for me.”
With that she ran off towards the nearest metro station. There was a brief debate about who should drive next, before everyone accepted Lynn was the best driver in the group and should handle the minibus in the city. Sitting down behind the dragon, Nick decided to try to hit up a conversation with their guide after a quick introduction.
“So, you know that part of the country?” Nick asked.
Ao Lie nodded. “My father’s the King of the Western Sea, and I’ve travelled the area extensively. I’m sure even a foreigner like you heard of my most famous journey, with Tang Sanzang?”
“Tang… oh, Journey to the West? I remember there’s a pig and a monkey… were you the third guy helping out?” Nick asked.
“No, no,” Ao Lie said, before closing a fist as tears of pride flowed forth from his eyes. “I was Tang Sanzang’s noble steed.”
“Oh…” Nick replied, before leaning back in his seat.
He let his focus drift out the window as Ao Lie happily recounted the whole story, but from his perspective as a horse.
-b-
Ao Lie was somehow still talking when Nick took over driving. Which was made more impressive by the fact that Damao had driven for a round after Lynn’s shift at the wheel. They were nearly in Shaanxi before the dragon finally stopped talking, to everyone’s relief.
-b-
It was proving to be a good way to see the country. Nick couldn’t deny that, even if he didn’t quite have Neil’s enthusiasm for the landscape. The dry lands they’d driven through since Luliang reminded Nick of home more than anything.
The food was very different, though. Nick was also glad to have Damao and Lynn’s help to find their way to more authentic local restaurants. After all, there was nothing to say they shouldn’t enjoy themselves on their way to pick up Axel.
Even Ao Lie eventually made up for his annoying talkative nature, helping them find good food and better gas prices once they entered Qinghai on the second day.
Finally, though, the drive was over, and they’d arrived at the small green valley that was Zhòuquánxiāng. Nick stretched as he got out of the car, walking towards a small house beside a number of small ponds.
He made it a few steps before realising Ao Lie hadn’t left the minibus.
“You coming?” Nick asked, as the others kept walking.
“I… I’m good in here,” the dragon said, his seatbelt still done up.
“Ok…” Nick replied, turning and walking with the others.
Neil was taking pictures on his phone, while they walked over to the small house.
“Ah, greetings honoured guests,” a woman in an old and ill fitting PLA uniform said as she stepped out of the small building. “Welcome to the Zhòuquánxiāng martial arts training grounds. I am Pu Lhamu, a guide at your service.”
“Hello,” Lynn said, having been the closest to her. “We’re here to pick up a… an associate. Axel Backer?”
The woman let out a sigh. “Oh, finally… I mean… um…”
“He talked about fish, didn’t he?” Nick asked, catching up to the others.
“So much,” Pu Lhamu replied, eyes going distant. “He didn’t seem to be handling being this far from the ocean very well… also, he has the second worst sense of direction I’ve ever seen. It’s been hard to keep him from wandering off whenever he goes outside.”
“Second worst?” Nick said, blinking as he remembered the stories Tom had told him.
“You don’t want to know,” the woman replied, her eyes drifting to Damao for a moment, for some reason. “Anyway, I’ll go get him from the main house. I shouldn’t be long. Just up the hill.”
They watched her hurry off before Nick’s eyes drifted over to the ponds with the bamboo poles sticking out of them. He was more than a little curious.
“I’ll guess you’re supposed to do balance practice?” Damao said, having walked over to get a closer look at the same time as Nick.
“That’s what I was thinking…” he replied. “Is there a starting point, or…?”
The pair set out to explore the grounds for any obvious starting point, while Lynn followed them to act as a voice of reason. Despite his best efforts to get them to wait for the guide to return, eventually Nick gave into curiosity.
The landing was tricky, his martial arts experience being more grounded with judo than anything bouncy, but he managed.
Damao hopped up on a bamboo pole not far from him, landing with far greater grace than you would expect from such a solidly built man.
“Going to join us, Lynn?” Nick shouted over his shoulder.
“As an angel, I can balance on a pinhead if I want to, but there’s no point,” Lynn muttered, saving most of his judgmental look for Damao.
“Well, come on, wolfie, I’ll race you to the other side!” Nick declared, before jumping ahead. “Touching the ground means you lose.”
“Race? I—hey!” Damao shouted, before bouncing after him.
Despite the head start, Damao was faster at it, to Nick’s annoyance. He only remembered now that Damao had ballet experience, so his grace should have been expected.
Nick was starting to really fall behind when he spotted Neil on his path, taking more pictures. Neil was an easier target than a pole, and his head wasn’t technically the ground, so… Nick bounced off his little brother for the speed boost, sending the white haired demon sprawling into the water as Nick bounded off.
“That’s cheating!” Damao shouted.
“It’s being creative!” Nick replied, crossing a few more pools before he realised Neil was still under water.
He halted in place and turned around, calling out his brother’s name. Damao also stopped, staring at the bubbling pool. None of the three men knew what to do, until, to their surprise, a (small) giant panda burst out of the water. Wearing Neil’s clothes. With a side braid and surprisingly fluffy hair on its head.
The panda blinked, looking at its hands, then down into the water, at its reflection. The panda let out a confused cry.
“Wah!” a female voice called out, drawing everyone’s attention over. Pu Lhamu had returned, dragging Axel by the sleeve behind her. “Honoured guests! You shouldn’t have gone near the cursed springs!”
“They’re cursed?” Damao asked, looking down at the pool below him.
“Mhm. Ancient curses. Anyone who falls into a spring takes the form of the first thing to fall in. Your friend fell in the Spring of the Drowned Panda,” the guide explained as she approached.
“I-I’m getting down ri—” Damao began to stay, only to have the bamboo pole beneath him snap, causing him to fall in.
“Oh no. That is the Spring of the Drowned Dog,” the woman said.
A moment later a large grey dog emerged and let out a sad howl.
“Ooh. A Tibetan Mastiff. A very large breed for a large man. Makes sense,” the guide explained.
Nick looked around, realising how far he was from dry ground. Sure, Damao had gotten off lightly, but who knew what the water beneath him meant. He might turn into a frog or slug or something. There was no easy single jump to safety though, so maybe—
“I’ll get you down,” Lynn said, flying up to him.
“Woah! Watch the wings!” Nick shouted, as a gust from Lynn’s flapping nearly threw him off balance.
“Do you not want the help?” Lynn asked, fluttering just out of reach and crossing his arms.
“I just could have used a little warning!” Nick shouted, waving his fist at Lynn in irritation.
Aaand losing his balance in the process. His arms and tail flailed, but there was no recovering. As he fell forward, he reached out to grab for Lynn’s support. Only to grab Lynn’s wing by mistake and pull him down with him.
The pair hit the water seconds later. There was a blast of cold, hitting deeper than Nick’s bones. It felt like it was going into his very essence, if that made sense. He could tell his body had shifted, but he wasn’t sure how as he surfaced, gasping for air.
“Oh, and you two got the Spring of the Drowned Girl… that is one of our two most popular ones, both on purpose or accidentally,” the guide said, sounding unconcerned.
“Huh. You really look just like Nico, but with shorter hair,” Axel said, from where he was standing beside Pu Lhamu.
“I—” Nick started.
“Oh. Wonderful. This is what I get for trying to help a devil…” a feminine voice grumbled.
Turning, Nick saw an angelic woman, rage in her eyes as her eye and wings twitched. With her short hair and baggy masculine clothing, the feminine part of Nick’s heart did a somersault.
“Wait. Lynn?” Nick asked.
The currently female Lynn stared. “Yes. Obviously.”
The guide let out a tired sigh. “Let’s get you all inside. Some hot water will fix this…”
“Hot water?” Nick and Lynn asked in unison, while Neil and Damao made ‘arf’ noises.
“Cold water activates a curse, hot water deactivates it,” Axel replied. “I learned that when someone fell in a couple days ago.”
“Oh thank goodness this is reversible,” Lynn said, climbing out of the pool.
-b-
Sitting in the small out building, waiting for the guide to fish Damao’s clothes out of the pond, everyone was left staring at the towel clad werewolf, who looked far more upset about this than he had any right to be.
“It’s barely any different from usual for you,” Nick said.
“It’s completely different,” a teary-eyed Damao replied. “My ears go all floppy! And my tail sits funny!”
“Maybe it’s an uncanny valley thing?” Neil offered, legs bouncing as he sat in his chair.
Nick ignored the sparkle in his brother’s eyes and walked over to grab a glass of water. Lynn had shoved Axel into the minibus before he could get cursed too, which meant Nick was free to experiment. As such, he dumped the glass of water on his head. Looking in a mirror, she was unsurprised by the face staring back at her, though it was weird to see her hair so short while female.
She then clapped her hands and called up transformation magic. A moment later he was looking at himself again, though he’d accidentally made his hair too short for his pigtail, the hair tie falling on the ground. That took a bit of fussing to fix.
He turned around to see Lynn glaring at him.
“Were you liking the other view more?” Nick asked with a grin.
“I was just thinking that I should have let you fall in. It’s not even a curse for you,” Lynn grumbled, his arms crossed.
“Ah, but then,” Nick said, grabbing another glass of water. “I wouldn’t get to see what a cute woman you make.”
He dumped the glass on Lynn’s head, the angel shrinking, features growing softer. She glared up at him in response. Lynn grabbed her halo, causing it to flare with purifying light.
Neil was turned back into a goat, Damao a wolf, and Nick was left a human woman.
“Gah! My horns!” she yelped, feeling honest panic.
Lynn’s purification induced transformations were usually temporary, but mixed with this new curse… she was briefly terrified she might be human forever.
“Ah! I didn’t mean to do that!” Lynn said, hopping to her feet with panic in her eyes as Nico realised she’d muttered her fear out loud. “Uh, maybe if we get you another kettle…”
It was then that the guide walked back in, taking in the new forms of Nico, Damao, and Neil.
“Alright, that doesn’t usually happen…” the woman said, eyes lingering on the demon tailed goat that was Neil the longest.