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Panam was V’s best choom at his wedding. She had everything prepared for today. Really hella expensive rings cause Kerry couldn’t help himself from buying the biggest rocks he could find? Check. The best Nomad hooch for the reception? Definitely a check. Officiant, caterers, sound – all checks.
But groom – absolutely not fucking here.
“Where the hell are you V? You should have been here twenty minutes ago!” Panam screamed into the holo after V finally answered on the tenth call.
V had the video shut off, but his strained voice came through clear on the holo. “Little busy Pan.”
Oh, he did not just… “Busy!? You’re busy? What the fuck V? WHERE ARE YOU?”
“Shit Panam, calm down, just a sec…” V leans away from the holo and Panam can hear two shots echo in the background. “And can you keep the screaming to a minimum? Just shot two gonks that found my location from your screeches.”
Panam’s voice dropped as requested. “V, are you okay? Who’s shooting at you?”
“It’s a long…” another shot rings out and Panam hears a body thud in the background “…story Pan. Which I definitely don’t have time for. Got myself pinned by some snipers and I don’t really have great options on an exit strategy here.”
Realization slowly dawns on Panam. “You better be fucking kidding me V. You did not take a job on your wedding day.”
V’s line goes silent for a few seconds. “…and if I did?”
“V! WHAT THE FUCK?!”
Automatic weapon fire starts in the background, as V frustratingly replies, “Panam, WHAT did I say about the screaming?” V pauses to take a few shots from what Panam can only assume is Archangel. “Look, I’m going to have to go. Think I found a vent I can crawl out of but I need silence for that.”
“V! Before you go, what the hell do I tell Kerry?”
V’s reply is stern. “Nothing. You can’t tell him a damn thing Pan. Distract him, lie to him, I don’t give a shit. I will be there. I just need a little more time.”
“You fucking better be V. Because if you miss this wedding you better hope you get killed on this job, ‘cause otherwise Kerry will kill you instead. But way more slowly and painfully.”
“Got it Pan. Be there soon.”
Panam sighed as V hung up. She did not sign up for this shit.
Kerry checked the time. An hour left until the ceremony. He was anxious, but not because he was worried about his decision to get married for a second time. He loved V more than anything on this planet, and Kerry now wanted the rest of the world to know it too. He started thinking of all the press and coverage a secret Kerry Eurodyne wedding will receive once the word gets out, but he tried to push that upcoming headache out of his mind and be calm. Fuck, he was still anxious. He just wanted to get things over with so he could marry the love of his life and then get wrecked at the reception.
Kerry stood in a room on a separate side of the church from V, since V believed in the superstition that it was bad luck to see your partner before the ceremony. Kerry stayed at the villa last night while V was at the condo, and although they hadn’t even spent a whole day apart, Kerry was desperate to be with V.
Shit, Kerry didn’t give a fuck about superstitions. He was gonna go see V, just to calm himself down a little.
Kerry wandered over to the side of the church he knew V was on. Kerry yet again questioned why the hell he had agreed to get married in a church. He was honestly surprised he wasn’t struck dead on entry. But V had been raised religious and wanted to get married in a church, and Kerry was a big, stupid, lovesick gonk who was putty in V’s hands. So here he was, a man who had broken every one of the ten commandments with gusto, going to say his vows at an altar.
He finally found his way to the room where V was supposed to be getting ready. He rapped on the door, and Panam quickly answered, eyes peering at him thorough a small crack in the door. She looked…harried? Upset?
“Hey Panam,” Kerry said, ignoring how worked up the woman was for the moment. “I just wanted to talk to V real quick.”
“I can’t let you in here!” Panam yelled in an octave a bit higher than normal.
Kerry stared at Panam suspiciously. “Why?”
Panam’s eyes flew up in panic, but then she must’ve had a thought that cooled her anxiety some. “Because it’s bad luck! V insists. You know how he is.”
“Okaaay,” Kerry replied. “Well, what if I don’t see him at all? We can just talk through the door.” Kerry’s voice became louder. “That work, V?”
Panam swiveled her head around, turned back and looked at Kerry, told him simply “Nope,” and then slammed the door on him. He heard the knob lock, and the rattle of the doorknob after he tried again to get into the room confirmed that the door was barred.
“What the fuck V?” Kerry yelled through the closed door but heard no reply. “Fine, be that way! I better see you in an hour.”
Kerry stormed off. He knew he was being lied to. V wasn’t here. Where the fuck was he?
V was STILL crawling through vents when he felt his holo vibrate. Every time he tried to find an exit from the vents there were at least three Militech assholes around. He was gonna have to go back to where he started and come up with another exit plan. V grabbed his holo after it vibrated again, afraid it would rattle the metal of the ventilation shaft if he didn’t move it from his pocket.
Panam: Shit, I think Kerry knows.
Panam: Like V, you have to get here now.
V held back a groan of frustration as he heard an armed guard walk by his hiding place.
V: Pan, what the hell? I told you to stall him!?
Panam: I tried! He came to your room looking for you though, and I panicked. He knew you weren’t there. How far away are you?
Shit, V didn’t know. He pinged Panam his location.
V: No clue? How far away am I?
Panam: Let me check…
Panam: Ten minutes V. You have time to get here because if Kerry finds out where you are before then…
V: Yeah, shit, I’ll be toast. Everyone that might come looking for me needs to know where I am or Kerry is gonna get even more suspicious when people start getting nervous that I’m not there. So River, Vik, Mama Welles, Misty, Judy…text them my pinged location so they know where I am and also so they don’t go looking for me. Let them know I’m fine, just running behind schedule on a job. And tell them to stay put! If he sees someone leaving he WILL follow them. Ker isn’t stupid.
Panam: Well thank God someone has brains in the relationship.
V emerged back where he first entered the ventilation shaft and hid behind the nearest crate for cover. It looked like a few of the men in the room had moved on, so he might have a chance forcing his way out now.
V: I need you ALL to avoid him. He’ll be pissed, but he’ll have nothing to go on if none of you say a word. I’m almost out of here Pan. I’ll be there.
Panam: Good. Because I’m not driving all the way to the Columbarium to visit your ass if you are late.
V sighed. Sneaking out was not gonna work. It was time for guns blazing.
Kerry tried to wait patiently in his dressing room. V knew how important today was, he wouldn’t do something too stupid, right?
Oh God, this was V. He totally would.
Right, so trying to be patient lasted five whole minutes. Now he was going to find some answers.
Kerry left his dressing room again looking for any of V’s friends. Maybe someone else knew where V was and was willing to tell him.
He thought he saw River at the end of hallway, and could have sworn River saw him, but by the time he got there the P.I. had disappeared.
“Okay, that’s a little strange,” Kerry said to himself.
Kerry started wandering around the hallways, hoping to find someone. He didn’t want to run into the chapel where most people were, since it would alert everyone that something was wrong. Dear God, his cousins had flown all the way from the Philippines to be here and were so happy for Kerry, and here he was, forty minutes before the wedding with no idea if it would even happen. He couldn’t let his family see how worried he was.
He spotted Judy and ran up to her before she could disappear like River did. She turned on him cooly. Shit, why did he have to run into the one person who could likely lie to his face the easiest? Fuck it, he was still gonna try.
“Hey Judy, you seen V?”
“Nah, Kerry. He’s probably in his dressing room”
“But see, he wasn’t. And I can’t seem to find him.”
Judy laughed. “Hey, maybe he’s running around the building trying to find you, and you keep missing each other? I don’t know. He’s around here somewhere.” She started walking backwards to the nearest door. “Anyways, I’m on soundcheck so I gotta delta. See you in a few!” And with that she sprinted into the next room.
Oh, now Kerry could see he was on the right track. Someone knew where V was. And Kerry was going to make them tell him.
Panam: River just had to run away from Kerry before he caught up with him. And Judy was just interrogated by Kerry too. He’s on the warpath. I don’t know how much longer we can keep him from finding out where you are. If he doesn’t find out soon, he’s going to have a meltdown for the ages.
V glanced at his phone after dispatching the rest of the idiots in the room, seeing Panam’s new texts.
V: I’m almost there Pan! Just give me like fifteen and I’ll be there.
Panam: You better. Because I remember the absolute shit-fit he had when you were late to the birthday party he threw you, and I do not want to have to deal with that diva again.
V laughed quietly. God, Ker was pissed about that one. V had forgotten it was his 30th birthday and arrived two hours late to the villa, covered in blood from some pissant that decided to try and kidnap a corpo’s kid for ransom. Kerry had taken V upstairs before the screaming started, but with an open floor plan and Kerry’s loud voice, everyone had heard V get the chewing out of a lifetime. Panam may have recited Kerry’s tantrum constantly afterwards, her favorite quote being “You FORGOT V? Did I dick you down so hard last night you didn’t remember the fucking day you were born?!”
V: I’ll be there. Just let me work and stop texting me for five minutes.
V put the holo back in his pants, right as a bullet flew by just a foot to the right of the shelving he was hiding behind.
A voice yelled at V from across the room. “You think you can get the drop on me and take my shard and I not come and kill you?”
Fuck! V had shot this shithead earlier! V reloaded Archangel, pulled the pin out of a frag grenade, and got ready to rumble.
Panam was ride or die. She wouldn’t tell Kerry anything. Judy, nah, she was all sass and barbs. She’d keep her trap shut and maybe throw in some insults too. River’s an ex-cop so no; Vik a protective father-figure who may also hate Kerry so definite nope. Then he saw her, the weak link.
“Heya Misty. Got a sec?” Kerry said, hurrying up to Misty as she was headed back to the chapel from the bathroom.
“Kerry!” Misty exclaimed, surprise and anxiety written on her face. Oh, she knew. “Shouldn’t you be in the back getting ready? It’s almost time for the ceremony!”
“Well see, Misty, that’s the thing. V should have been here more than an hour ago, and for some reason everyone is avoiding me and nobody has been able to tell me where he is. Doesn’t that seem a bit strange?”
Misty chuckled uncomfortably. “I don’t think anyone’s avoiding you Kerry. Just pre-wedding jitters making you a little anxious is all.”
Okay, Kerry was done with everyone but him knowing where V was. “Look Misty, I am supposed to be getting married in a half hour, and I haven’t heard from my fiancé all day. Everyone here is acting shady as fuck and if I don’t find out where V is RIGHT NOW I will…” Kerry cut himself off – threatening Misty wouldn’t get him anything.
“Shit, Misty, I can’t go through this today.” Kerry said, sliding defeated against the nearest wall, turning on the waterworks as tears welled in his eyes. “You don’t think he reconsidered, do you?”
“No!” Misty gasped! “He loves you Kerry!”
“Then tell me where he is. Please. Because right now it feels like he’s leaving me, and my heart is breaking.”
He didn’t even have to shed one tear before she fessed up V’s location. He’ll have to send her a thank-you gift later, if he doesn’t end up in prison for murdering his fiancé on his wedding day.
Now to go find V. Kerry’s shoes clacked on the pavement as he ran to his Aerondight. He’s glad he’s shined them so well today – it’ll make it easier for them to go up V’s ass when he kicks it.
Just one more reload, a couple more shots, and he was out. Only one man between him and the exit. V rolled out from behind the crate he was using for cover and fired three shots at the head of the goon blocking the door. V leaped over the body and out into the sun. Finally! He was gonna be close on time but he’d make it!
“Drop the gun,” a voice from his right said, as V felt the cold barrel of a rifle against his head. V froze, slowly released Archangel, and put his hands up. Any move otherwise would have led to his brains blown out on the pavement. God, V was so fucked. If he surrendered maybe he could escape later, but odds were slim Militech would be so unprepared next time. His heart broke as he thought of leaving Kerry alone at the altar, maybe even alone for the rest of his life.
“Not one move fucker,” the Militech gunmen ordered. “You’re coming with me. I have some friends back at central that would love to talk to you. And when we’re done with that, maybe we’ll be merciful and kill you quickly.”
A shot rang out behind the gunmen, and his rifle fell as his dead body crumpled onto the ground.
“Oh no, you don’t get to kill him. That’s for ME to do you fucking prick.”
V lowered his hands as he looked upon the most beautiful sight in his life. Kerry was dressed to the nines, black suit jacket and gray button-up shirt tight and showing off all the places that made V’s blood race. His cybernetics sparkled in the sun, his tie matched the blue of his eyes, and his black dress shoes gleamed. He held a pistol – the one V kept in the Aerondight – in his right hand, and he slowly lowered it after making his clean kill-shot.
Kerry was looking incredibly beautiful, but also INCREDIBLY pissed. V wasn’t sure if he would have had a better chance of living if he was taken by Militech.
“Car.” Kerry barked, seething. “NOW.”
“Ker…”
“Not one more fucking word. Get in the car.”
V picked Archangel up from the ground. He walked over to the car slumped and defeated, settling down in the front passenger seat. Kerry got behind the wheel and peeled out of the lot.
“Ker…”
“Shut. Up.”
V quieted. He could see Kerry was really working up to something, and V braced for the yelling to start.
Instead, Kerry released a soft sigh. “V, if you don’t want to get married then fucking say so.”
V had expected a Kerry shit-fit of epic proportions. He was stunned. “Ker, why in the world would you think I don’t want to get married to you?”
“Oh, I don’t know V,” Kerry says, a little more emphatically. “Maybe the fact that you’d rather get shot at then be at the church with me?”
V chuckled involuntarily, earning a glare from Kerry that would leave him deceased if looks could kill. “Ker, that’s not it at all. I fucking love you. That’s the whole reason I’m here in the first place. I was trying to surprise you with something good on our wedding day. I just thought it’d take less time than it did.”
Kerry narrowed his eyes suspiciously at V. “Explain. And it better be fucking good.”
V nodded. “Okay, so I’d been looking for a way to get you out of your contract with MSM free and clear for awhile now. You’ve been wanting out for forever, that place makes you miserable, but I know you have been scared of the shitstorm that could happen if you break contract. So I kept my ears to the ground. Running the Afterlife don’t hurt none for finding out the kind of things I needed. Heard some rumors that MSM was using a shady character to intimidate new bands into signing shitty contracts. So I started digging some more. Prick’s name is Elistair Michaels, big shit merc from out on the east coast. Been hoping he’d stop by Night City soon so we could have a chat, and he did. Just fucked that it was today. It couldn’t wait – he could have been gone tomorrow.”
“Good chat?”
V laughed. “Great chat Ker. Got the drop on the fucker as he was walking to his car, and he sang so sweetly MSM should have signed him for a three-record deal. Unfortunately, I didn’t know that he had teamed up with Militech while he was in town, and he sent them an emergency signal from the warehouse I took him to as soon as he realized who I was. Guess he thought I wouldn’t get out of there alive with the amount of Militech gonks that were gonna show up, so didn’t matter what he said. Underestimated me of course, but really fucked with my plans today.”
“You almost didn’t get out of there alive, you asshole.” Kerry seethed. “And it’s not just your plans that were fucked with you little shit.”
V sighed. “Nah Kerry, not just mine. I’m sorry.” V smiled warmly at his fiancé. “Would a shard with messages from MSM telling a merc to intimidate bands into signing exploitative contracts and a recording of said merc spilling their guts about it make it up to you just a little?”
Kerry suddenly beamed. “So you’re saying…we’re gonna blackmail MSM.”
V beamed back. “Yup. Blackmail ‘em, get you out of that contract. And then we release it to the media anyways. I was thinking Nance. Be a big story for her.”
The Aerondight was stopped at a red light, so Kerry reached over and grabbed V’s shirt, pulling him into a kiss. He released his grip as the light turned green. “Ah yes! We’ll get those fuckers!” Kerry’s said with manic glee. His tone then turned a bit more serious. “I’m still pissed at you V. So monumentally pissed. And I will take it out on your ass later, you can fucking guarantee.” He looked at V out of his peripherals, eyes soft. “But I was so scared today. Of you leaving me, of something happening to you.”
“I never meant to scare you Kerry,” V said apologetically. “You gotta know I’d never leave you. And I am too afraid to die on you. You’d bring me back from the dead just to scream at me about how pissed off you are that I went and got myself killed.”
“Fuck right I would.”
“Exactly Ker. Today I’m marrying you, but I’ve been tied to you long before now. This is it for me babe.”
Kerry smiled at V. “Yeah, this is it for me too.”
“Has to be. Ain’t nobody else willing to marry an antique.”
“And I’m the only one willing to marry a smartass little merc that doesn’t know when to stop pushing his luck.”
“Alright, alright, I’ll stop. But I love you Ker.”
“Love you too V.” Kerry’s face scrunched up quickly, like he just had an important thought. “Wait V. What the fuck am I gonna do without a record label? I told you I don’t want to get stuck in that cage playing for no one.”
“Well, I thought of that too. Won’t all these assholes from any label be the same, trying to make as much money off people as possible without any interest in the art or the passion of music? MSM is same as the rest. Well, MSM was special ‘cause it did have that fucker Kovachek, but we put him in his place.”
Kerry laughed. “Damn straight we did.”
“So anyways, I started thinking, well shit, my Ker can do anything. Why not run his own label?”
Kerry blinked. “Wait, what?”
V started speaking more loudly and slowly. “I said, I thought why not have you run your own label? You losing your hearing in your old age?”
“Oh, don’t think I’ll forget the ‘Kerry’s old’ jokes when I get my retribution for today. So keep making ‘em at your own peril choom.”
V put his hands up in surrender, relenting. “Fine Kerry. But really. Your own label. You’d be free to make what you want, sign what talent you want, treat people the way they should be treated. Take the corpos out of your music, make it what it should be.”
“But V,” Kerry said with a sigh. “It’s not just me playing songs. We’d need PR, equipment, marketing, design, advertising, sound mixing, tour busses, roadies…I can’t all do that.”
V grabbed Kerry’s right hand from where it was resting on Kerry’s leg. “Ker, it ain’t just you doing this. I’ve already talked to Rogue to see if it was possible to take some time off from running the Afterlife to help you out. She said she’d run it ‘til we got everything off the ground. Kerry, between your music connections and my connections to all of Night City, we can do this. Together.”
Kerry pulled into the church lot, ten minutes before the wedding was set to begin. “Alright. I believe in you V. I believe in us. We can do anything together.” Kerry looked off towards the church. “But can we please get married first?”
V’s heart sung. Kerry was really doing this label thing, and Ker still wanted to marry him after the idiot stunt V pulled today. V’s smile shone like the gold of Kerry’s cybernetics. “Yeah Kerry, we can.”
With both the grooms finally there, the wedding went off as planned and was a roaring success. Kerry became so drunk off Aldecaldo hooch he fell off the stage while playing “Save Me from the Shadows” for V, and V fell over himself while trying to pick Kerry up. The dancing was wild, the food was amazing, and the guests had a blast. Vik even told Kerry he had a good time and halfway smiled at Kerry, so Kerry wrapped him up into a drunk hug and shed a few happy tears on the Ripperdoc’s shoulders.
As the night wound down, Panam sat on the edge of the stage with V, watching Kerry telling some insane story to Mitch and Saul that had them all in stitches.
“Thanks for being my best choom Pan.”
“Anytime V. But I swear to God if you pull that disappearing act shit on me and Kerry again, I’ll help him kill you.”
V laughed. “I’ll keep that in mind Panam.” V sat in silence, an idea suddenly coming to him. “Hey Pan! You ever thought about being a roadie?”
Kerry got his revenge on V during the first night of their honeymoon in the Philippines. When Kerry said he was going to take out his anger on V’s ass, he meant that literally. V’s ass cheeks were so red from Kerry’s smacks that V had trouble sitting for two days.
He secretly loved every second of his torture, but he had a feeling Kerry had planned as much.
Fuck he loved that man. His new business partner. His best friend. And now his husband.