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Yuusuke knows the signs. He knows he can be stupid, and it takes a few days. But it’s there. Tsukasa’s slight trembling at their touch. He’s following everyone, almost, which is what feels wrong, because he’s supposed to lead.
He’s. He’s playing a Role? Yuusuke supposes. Feels like Tsukasa’s just-off expression when he pushed Yuusuke away, in the Rider War.
Yuusuke’s lucky. Maybe. Almost. He had Uu. A friend. He had the other Riders’ help, too. Tsukasa quite on purpose had no one. Tsukasa who is so exhausted, even now a week later. Tsukasa who doesn’t cling, oh no, but who clearly wants to.
God, the Rider War was hell for the man who owns Yuusuke’s heart. And he won’t reach out, so…
Yuusuke pulls Tsukasa on top of him, about a week after. Tsukasa blinks.
“Demanding,” he says.
“From you?” Yuusuke replies. Tsukasa smiles, a real one.
“Fair point,” he says, arms gently wrapping around Yuusuke. Tsukasa touches Yuusuke like he might break. “I missed you.”
So did I , Yuusuke thinks but can’t say. Tsukasa’s unfair, in this moment. He’d been prepared to die, to die with Yuusuke convinced he was evil. So it’d be easier. But he failed. Whispered words moments before Yuusuke’s memories cut off that tore him apart upon return.
We’ll trade places soon.
He came back to life not five minutes later.
Tsukasa had not.
Tsukasa who trembles ever so slightly in Yuusuke’s arms. He hides it well. Mostly. And yet…
They’ve not talked of it yet. None of them are ready, and will they ever be?
Tsukasa is shaking.
“Yuusuke,” he says softly. Yuusuke meets his gaze, pulls him into a kiss, and keeps the taller man close as he whispers.
“I’m sorry,” Yuusuke says. “I’m sorry you were alone. I’m sorry I believed you, when you told me you were a destroyer.”
“I needed you to,” Tsukasa replies. “I needed you to be okay when I died.”
“Even if it was true,” Yuusuke says. “I could never be okay with that. I’m sorry I left you alone. No one but a ghost.”
He remembers Tackle. The original Stronger from the World so many of the Riders involved had been from, hadn’t been available. The one who died, Yuusuke learned later, was 17. He’d mentioned his dead girlfriend. Killed by Dai-Shocker invaders.
Identical to a 16 year old girl who could occasionally be seen with Tsukasa.
“I wasn’t alone, then.”
“You were,” Yuusuke says. “You hid yourself away so it wouldn’t hurt. But you’re safe now. You can stop supporting us. The war’s over. We… We won. You can rest now.”
Tsukasa is still inches from him, but at those words, he goes boneless, shaking with silent tears against Yuusuke. Yuusuke holds him.
“I’m sorry,” Tsukasa murmurs back. “My fault. I tried. I wanted to fix it. It was the only way. The only way, I…”
“I know,” Yuusuke says. “It’s okay. We’re okay now.”
And he’s crying too. Because they’re not okay yet, not really. And it hurts. The betrayal and the loss and even now, it hurts.
“It’s over,” Tsukasa murmurs, still shaking. “We can rest now. Right?”
“Right,” Yuusuke says, still clinging to Tsukasa as tightly as he is to Yuusuke. “It’s over. We can.”
And eventually, finally, Tsukasa calms, and Yuusuke runs out of tears. Tsukasa’s breath evens until he’s seemingly asleep, in fact. Yuusuke smiles, readjusting to a more comfortable position.
Then he notices Tsukasa’s still very open eyes.
“Tsukasa?” He asks. Tsukasa doesn’t move. “Tsukasa!”
“…Just… stay… stay there,” Tsukasa says slowly, like words are a struggle to form, and he’s not otherwise moving. “I’m… fine… if you’re here.”
…An issue for later.
“Okay,” Yuusuke says. “I’m here, then.”
And he is. And Tsukasa is. And for now, that’s enough.
A little later, Natsumi comes in.
“Hey, Daiki said—”
She takes in the scene and Yuusuke smiles. Tsukasa smiles, too. The real one.
“We talked,” Yuusuke says.
“Then Yuusuke decided to become a leach,” Tsukasa adds, not actually having tried to move Yuusuke at any point.
“Oh,” she says. “Are you both okay?”
“We will be.”
Natsumi nods.
“Daiki’s headed off, tomorrow,” Natsumi says. “So he’s probably—”
“On my way to join the party?” Daiki asks, joining Natsumi in the doorway. “Yes I am and I brought chocolates.”
“Perfect, give,” Tsukasa says, gesturing for the other two to join them in the bed. Yuusuke can’t help the blush as he ends up in Tsukasa’s lap, the other two at his sides.
They’re all here, after all.
And they’re smiling, and so… things will definitely get better from here.