Chapter Text
"Why the fuck," Villanelle huffs as she slides back into the driver's seat for the fourth time today.
She pulls up her phone and grumbles, "did they make it illegal or something?"
Her list still has five more stores on it that could potentially have it- and she needs to find it today; she's been looking for weeks, cycling through store after store on the hunt.
It should not be this hard to find tea.
The grocery store used to carry it before they suddenly stopped for no apparent reason- they still have all the other varieties that the brand makes, the only one that's no longer on the shelves is the one she needs.
Egyptian licorice mint.
Not licorice root, not spearmint, black licorice, peppermint, dandelion root, or licorice spice- Egyptian licorice mint.
Villanelle will not settle for anything other than Egyptian licorice mint.
The fifth store is a bust- they don't even have herbal teas, let alone hyper-specific blends made only by one single brand. It's the same story with the sixth.
"Hi," she says to the seventh underpaid employee of the day, "do you carry Egyptian licorice mint tea?"
"Have you checked aisle four? That's where it would be."
Obviously, I've checked aisle four.
"I didn't see it there, I was wondering if-"
"If it wasn't there, then I'm afraid we don't have any."
Villanelle only barely keeps her eyes from rolling, "do you know if any of your other stores have any? Maybe the one uptown?"
"Um," he falters, "we don't have any way of looking that up."
"Seriously?"
She hates that she's being that asshole in the grocery store, but goddamnit- she needs Egyptian licorice mint.
"No, I'm sorry, ma'am."
"Right," she gives him an understanding smile, "thanks for your time."
The health food store is eighth on her list.
"Hi-"
"Hi!" she's cheery, "how can I help you today?"
"I'm wondering if you carry Egyptian licorice mint tea?"
Her smile turns into a frown, "oh, I'm so sorry- we're out of it- it's a very popular tea, we usually sell out quickly."
"When are your shipments?"
"Ah, every third Friday, I think?" she calls to another register, "Barb! When is the shipment that has teas?"
"The first Friday of every month!"
Villanelle is already turning to leave, "okay, thank you!" and makes a mental note to put some bullshit in her calendar that'll allow her to come to this part of town on the first Friday of every month.
On her way to the last resort of the 'hippie-dip' store, as Eve calls it, Villanelle debates driving an hour and a half to the next major city- they have lots of grocery stores, probably.
The door chimes with a little silver bell as she enters the tiny store- her heart sinks when she notes that all they seem to have on their shelves are rocks, crystals, jewelry, statues, and miscellaneous trinkets.
As she turns to leave, someone behind her asks, "can I help you find anything?"
"Not unless you secretly have teas," Villanelle turns to find an older woman with confusion in her eyes, "sorry- that doesn't make any sense," she sighs, "I've been looking all day for this one type of tea and I don't think I'll find it."
"Is there another kind of tea you can get instead? Maybe something with the same properties?"
"No, it needs to be this specific tea."
"...may I ask why?"
She seems so friendly that Villanelle smiles, "it's for my very, very pregnant wife- I have to go away for a few days and I wanted to surprise her with it; it's her favourite, but it seems to have disappeared from every store."
Her eyes narrow with a smile, "...Egyptian licorice mint? Purple box?"
"How did you-"
"It's my favourite, too- and it was my wife's when she was pregnant."
Villanelle's jaw drops, "really?!"
"Really."
"Do you know where I could get some? I was considering going to N-"
"Follow me," she turns away.
She doesn't hesitate for a second as she's led to the back room and shown a shelf full to the brim with little boxes.
"Holy shit?" Villanelle quickly covers her mouth, "oh, I'm sorry- I mean-"
"Don't worry, I'm not that kind of old person," she chuckles, "take as many as you want."
"Are you sure? How much do you want for them?"
"I don't want anything," she smiles wide, "knowing your wife will have them is plenty."
Villanelle reels, "are you sure? You clearl-" she looks at the plethora of purple, "you clearly stock up on them, and-"
She's cut off by a loud laugh, "my wife would call it hoarding- I don't need this many, I'll never get through them."
"How do you have so many?!"
She shrugs, "I pick them up when I can, I get them as gifts a lot- like, a lot a lot."
"I can't just take them from you, there isn't anything I can get you? Coffee, or chocolate or something?"
Her features pinch, "tell you what- when you run out, come back for more and show me a picture of the baby, if that's alright with both of you?"
"Definitely," she breathes through a smile, "absolutely, thank you so much- d'you want to see a picture of us?"
She smiles wide, "please- that'd be lovely."
Villanelle rummages for her phone and shows her her lock screen, "her name is Eve- I'm Villanelle, by the way."
She reaches to shake Villanelle's hand, "nice to meet you, I'm Edie- my wife's name is Adora."
Edie looks at the picture of them in front of the whale, "you two make a very handsome couple," she smiles wide, "I can tell that you're in love."
Villanelle's heart softens, "yeah, we are."
With a new contact in her phone and three plastic bags in the passenger seat, Villanelle wonders how she's meant to hide twenty boxes of her wife's favourite tea around the house.