Work Text:
Shiroyabu slumped down on the bench of the Alternative Batting Centre, bruised and bloody. There was a numbness smattered across his body, he knew there were some bones broken. His eyes were sullen. How long was he awake? He wished he at least got some cash from the ATM's before the hitmen showed up, god knows he was hungry.
His ears pricked as the soft sound of footsteps made their way to his location. His stomach churned as he felt a presence of a man stand near him. He knew who it was and he wasn't in the mood.
"You disappoint me... Shiroyabu." He sneered. "I expected some bloodlust from you."
Shiroyabu stayed silent, twiddling his thumbs like he was accidentally damaging school property.
"I was hoping you achieved it by now. Oh well." Kurumizawa sat down next to Shiroyabu. He felt his spine tingle as he saw the extra pair of shoes next to his. "I was expecting more from you. My bar was high."
Shiroyabu continued to look downward, biting his lip as the man spoke. Kurumizawa's voice felt like a pin pricking his skin.
"Did the last two assassin's give you any trouble?"
He sat still for a bit.
"I said... Did. They. Give. You. Any. Trouble?" His voice was more forceful this time. Shiroyabu nodded instantly.
"Ah, I see." He chuckled.
The men sat in silence for a few minutes. The whole time, Shiroyabu wished he was anywhere but here, seeing anyone but him.
Kurumizawa broke the ice.
"Do you want me to tell you a story?" He looked at Shiroyabu, a wicked grin spreading across his face.
Shiroyabu finally faced the man next to him. "What kind of story?"
"Imagine: 700 years in the future, through some last vestige of the internet kept in an underground server, a notification miraculously appears on your device." His voice was calm and unnerving. "Aliens are researching earthling history, trying to unearth millennia of war, civilisations, culture. But out of everything they have discovered thus far pales in comparison to this one notification. Let me ask; what is the notification?"
"Hell if I know..." He muttered.
"There's no harm in guessing." Kurumizawa was goading him.
"Peanut butter?"
"Wrong."
"Then I give up. There's no way in hell I'm guessing whatever it is you cooked up in that fucked up noggin of yours."
Kurumizawa's grin turned into a scowl. "You're no fun, you know that?"
"I'm tired, I wanna die."
"Put more effort into it, I'll tell you the answer anyway but it's no fun if you give up just like that."
Shiroyabu responded with silence.
"Ugh, fine! I'll tell you immediately." Kurumiawa cleared his through preparing to utter the word as if it could create world peace. "Amogus."
"..."
"Well?"
"The fuck does that even mean?"
"AMOGUS!"
"I heard you the first time, I have no idea what the fuck you're talking abo-"
"You sound really sus right now!"
Shiroyabu inched away from Kurumizawa on the bench. "You're freaking me out now."
"Hey... hey Shiroyabu." The wicked grin returned to his face, morphing inot something truly sinister. "Did you know there's an imposter Among Us!?"
"I-"
"What rhymes with Among Us? BIG CHUNGUS!"
"Yeah I think I'm gonna..."
BIG BIG CHUNGUS! BIG CHUNGUS! BIG CHUNGUS! BIG BIG CHUNGUS! BIG CHUNGUS! BIG CHUNGUS!"
Shiroyabu realising enough was enough jumped off the bench, attempting to run.
"Okay you're really freaking me out. I'm dropping this case. This day is nothing but bullshit anyway. Fuck this!" Shiroyabu walked-ran away from the deranged man only to meet his twisted gaze yet again.
"Chungus has no begining, chungus has no end, chungus is infi-"
"HOLY CRAP!" He faced the other direction only to-
"Chungus will endure years after our civilisation has been eradicated-"
He swivelled his head only to see ANOTHER kurumizawa blocking his path.
"Chungus is eternal. The pinnacle of evolution of our measly existence. We are but rudimentary creatures of blood, muscle and bone compared to that of chungus. We touch Chungus' mind fumbling over his existence-"
"Stop! Stop!"
As if on cue, three or five more Kurumizawa's materialised out of thin air, their faces widened as if infected with some form of madness. Shiroyabu assumed he must be going insane - some of Kurumizawa's looked like PS1 models, other's looked like pixels straight from the third generation of gaming... one even looked like he was drawn from an anime!
In unison they all chanted:
"CHUNGUS IS ORDER! CHUNGUS IS LIFE! CHUNGUS WILL KILL THE LIFE! CHUNGUS WILL KILL THE PAST!"
Breathing heavily, Shiroybau squatted down as the incomprehensible swarm surrounded him. With clear anguish plastered all over his face Shiroyabu covered his ears in a futile attempt to drown out Kurumizawa's chant.
"DON'T DEPEND ON THE CHUNGUS! DEPEND ON THE CHUNGUS! GOD LIVES IN THE CHUNGUS! THE CHUNGUS WILL LEAD YOU TO KNOWLEDGE AND WISDOM! DOUBT THE CHUNGUS! SAVE THE CHUNGUS! KILL THE CHUNGUS! BELEIVE IN THE CHUNGUS! I BELEIVE IN THE CHUNGUS! WE BELEIVE IN THE CHUNGUS!"
"THIS STARTED WITH AMONG US WHATEVER THAT IS!" He bawled, horrified in the situation he found himself in. "HOW DID WE GET TO BIG CHUNGUS?"
"CHUNGUS CHUNGUS CHUNGUS CHUNGUS CHUNGUS!"
And it went on like that for who-knows-how-long.
Shiroyabu was just coddling there screaming his ass off as Kurumizawa laughed maniacally repeating his inane Chungus chant.
Eventually, after what-felt-like-eternity, Shiroyabu realised what he has to do to make it stop.
How to save himself.
"Yes, I see it now. There's only one option."
The world twisted and turned as all he saw was Kurumizawa and the box.
the box with the letters emblazoned for him to see.
one option...
>Death File
then everything went black.
[CONTINUE TO TRANSMITTER]
[boys don't cry]
[digital man is coming soon..]
[1% Of Monster]