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“Dude, when are you and Carlos going to host game night again? You’ve been moved back in for two months now, I think the acclimating period is over.” Nancy gripes to TK as he drives them to their latest call.
He shakes his head, but smiles fondly to himself. He missed this, the easy banter between him and his partner. Getting teased about his relationship with Carlos, being back with the 126, all of it. He’s been back at work only a week, having spent a much longer time recovering from his latest brush with death than he’d like.
“You just want to see the loft,” he argues back.
Nancy shoots him a look, “Well duh, I had to listen to you gush about the place when you found it, complain about it when you lost it, and then learn about you being an idiot when Carlos wanted to help you keep it, all for you to not even let me see it yet.”
TK cringes as her words hit just a little too close to home. He and Carlos have discussed everything surrounding their break-up at length. Even started going to couple’s therapy together in an effort to make sure they learn to communicate better, but it still stings to hear someone mention it so casually. Mention it like those weren’t some of the worst moments and months of his life.
“Shit sorry TK.” Nancy sounds genuinely contrite, realizing she went too far this time.
He just shrugs, “Nothing you said is untrue, just maybe can you not keep reminding me I almost screwed up the best thing to ever happen to me?” TK replies softly.
“You didn’t TK,” Nancy places a hand gently on his arm to catch his attention, her eyes shining with regret, as he parks the ambulance in front of the address they’ve been called to. “I know it was complicated, I didn’t think before I spoke. You don’t deserve that.”
TK can tell she wants to say more, but now is really not the time to delve into his complicated feelings about the whole situation. “Come on Nance, we’ve got a call to take care of.” He diverts, jumping out of the ambulance and grabbing his med bag.
“What do we have Cap?” TK asks as Captain Vega exits the back of the ambulance and joins them in walking into the restaurant.
“Suspected allergic reaction.” She informs them before adding, “police presence has also been requested for a disturbance on site, so keep your heads up.”
“Copy Cap.” TK and Nancy respond, quickly shifting into professional mode. When they get inside the restaurant they’re directed to a small area towards the back of the dining room by a young, nervous looking hostess. They hear shouting coming from the center of a small crowd of people, but Tommy’s voice, firm and demanding, cuts through easily.
“Excuse us, let us through.” she says pushing into the crowd, until they can see a young boy being held in a woman’s arms. A man stands close by waiving his hands at a server and yelling almost incoherently.
Police aren't on scene yet and the situation seems to be rapidly spiraling out of control. “I’ll check on them.” TK says with a motion towards the man, as Tommy and Nancy crouch down in front of the young boy. Captain Vega nods, giving him her patented be careful look before turning and giving her full attention to the patient in front of her.
TK approaches the man and server from the side, cautiously observing the situation. “Sir.” He says loudly enough to catch both their attention. The man turns to him in surprise, eyes darting to where the young boy is being treated by TK’s team. TK assesses the situation quickly, taking in the way the man is breathing heavily and the redness that is blooming across his face, neck and chest.
“Sir, why don’t you sit down so I can have a look at you.” He repeats, ushering the man into a chair while surreptitiously stepping between him and the server, hoping the server gets the hint to make themself scarce.
“What seems to be the problem?” TK asks the man as he starts taking his vitals, assessing as he goes.
“I’m fine.” The man growls harshly, “these stupid idiots didn’t know there was mushrooms in the sauce and my son is allergic to mushrooms. It’s him you should be worried about.”
TK glances over his shoulder at Captain Vega and Nancy. Decided it best not to shout across the space he keys his radio. “Probable allergic reaction confirmed Cap. Dad says his son is allergic to mushrooms.”
“We got it covered.” comes Captain Vega’s reply. “How’s your patient?”
TK takes a second to assess the man’s rapidly deteriorating state. “Sir, are you allergic to anything?” He asks, startling the man to look at him.
“No,” he shakes his head, but brings his hand up to his throat, the words coming out raspy. “I don’t think so, please just take care of my son?”
“Your son is in good hands with my team. Let me focus on you.” TK assures him, reaching into his bag for the correct dose of a prefilled syringe of epinephrine.
“Everything okay here?” Comes the welcome voice of TK’s boyfriend as he walks into the room. They have the situation under control, but TK is always happy and calmed by the presence of Carlos at a scene.
“We’re good now.” TK spares a glance at him as he pulls out the needle and readies it for his patient. He’s not prepared for the reaction of the man in front of him as he jumps up out of his reach suddenly.
“No!” He shouts, “no needles I am fine.” The breathy quality to his voice and the red rash on his face and neck contradict his words and have TK jumping up to steady his patient before he can fall.
Carlos moves in to help as Nancy also joins him. TK hasn’t even realized that a second RA unit is on site and is beginning to transport the boy on a gurney out of the restaurant.
“Sir, you are having an allergic reaction. I need to give you this medicine and get you to the hospital.” TK explains calmly. Trying to get the man to settle down. The man’s struggles have become weaker due to his increasing symptoms and despite the implications of that TK is grateful for it when he’s able to get the man laying on the floor. He switches out the syringe for an autoinjector, thinking the lack of an obvious needle will help calm the patient. Nancy wordlessly accepts the autoinjector TK hands her, from his place holding the man’s legs still and removes the cap. They exchange a quick look and a nod before she readies the injection and brings it down to the patient’s thigh.
She’s quick and efficient, but at the last second the man seems to gather a second reserve of strength and fear as he jerks heavily and rolls in the hold TK and Carlos have on him. This causes TK to roll also, shifting slightly and having to put a hand down to brace himself from falling. It’s just his luck that his hand lands right next to the man’s leg, right in the path of the needle as Nancy administers it.
“Shit!” TK swears, as he tries to jerk his arm away at the sharp pierce of the needle. It’s too late though as Nancy was pressing down heavily in order to try and prevent their original patient from moving away and it takes a second for her to realize and pull back. Definitely long enough for the drug to enter TK’s arm.
Finally TK is able to pull back and there is a bright rivulet of red running down his forearm, he places a gloved hand on top of the mark, stemming the bleeding.
Carlos is looking wide-eyed between Nancy’s hand and TK’s arm. “Did you just stab my boyfriend with a needle?”
TK tries hard not to wince at the high-pitch of Carlos’ voice, while simultaneously trying to not freak out as he feels the effects of the drug taking hold rather quickly.
“The dude moved.” She argues, albeit weakly, all the while staring down at the autoinjector still gripped tightly in her fist.
TK despite his own worry and feeling like he is the only one with the ability to take control of this situation tries to calm them both. “He did move Nancy, it’s not your fault.” He shoots Carlos a look telling him to calm down and tries to reassure Nancy by placing a hand on her arm. He pulls it back though when he notices how it’s already starting to shake. Now that he’s noticed it he can feel the tremors working their way up his arm.
TK can’t let himself focus on that though as he realizes that their patient is still critical and has stopped moving on the floor underneath him.
“Nancy!” He snaps at her, making her eyes snap up to his. “Grab the second autoinjector from my bag, he needs epinephrine now .” He urges and watches as Nancy suddenly drops the spent one and pulls out the new autoinjector. Her hands are shaking as badly as TK’s by this time and she struggles for precious seconds to pull the safety cap off the end. TK reaches his own hands out to take it from her, but suddenly Carlos’ hands intercept and he’s efficiently pulling off the cap and motioning to the man’s leg. TK gives him a quick nod and Carlos doesn’t hesitate to dispense the medication into their patient just in time for Captain Vega to join them.
She quickly takes in the situation. The police officer holding the injector while her two medics shake steadily next to him.
“TK. Nancy. Report.” She snaps out.
TK glances at Nancy and when it’s clear she’s lost in her thoughts he responds in a shaky voice. “Anaphylactic reaction to an unknown source. Patient was combative and had to be restrained for injection of epinephrine. Patient lost consciousness approximately 1 minute ago and epinephrine was administered.”
Tommy nods at him, assessing the man laying still on the floor. She places an oxygen mask over his face, “He’s stable for now. Let's get him transported to the hospital.” She glances down at the arm TKs still holding tightly in gloved hand. “Strand?” she asks.
He shrugs, “He was combative. I got stuck in the crossfire.” His words seem to startle Nancy out of her daze as she starts laughing a little hysterically.
“Stuck.” she laughs, “Literally I stuck you with a needle. Shit.”
Tommy gives him a worried look, “You good to grab the gurney?” She asks him and TK can tell she wants to do more, but they have a critical patient in front of them and TK is fine .
He nods firmly, “I’m fine Cap.” he assures. Standing up on shaky legs, locking his knees and shaking out his limbs.
“I can assist.” Carlos offers moving with him.
TK hears Tommy talking to Nancy as he walks quickly out of the restaurant to grab the gurney. He can almost feel the drug burning its way through his system. His heart has begun pounding heavily in his chest and it feels like he’s run a marathon.
“You okay?” Carlos’ worried voice reaches him as he opens the back doors of the ambulance and they work together to maneuver the gurney out.
He nods quickly, resisting the urge to rub a hand over his chest, a tight feeling is beginning to creep in and it scares him more than he will admit right now. “I’m
fine
. Let’s just get this patient loaded up and to the hospital.”
“Yeah, I think you need the hospital too.” Carlos’ voice is steady, but it's clear he’s holding on to his professional demeanor by a thread. TK just nods, agreeing with his boyfriend that a trip to the hospital is definitely in store for him.
By the time they get back Captain Vega has been able to snap Nancy out of whatever spiral she was in and they are working efficiently to monitor the patient who is currently awake and at least semi-coherent. They get him loaded onto the gurney quickly and into the back of the ambulance.
Carlos lets his fingers linger on TK’s arm for a long moment, “I’ll meet you at the hospital as soon as I can. I love you.” He tells him softly his eyes saying everything he can’t in this moment, before he moves away and shuts the ambulance door with a bang to let Nancy know they’re ready to roll.
Seated in the back of the moving ambulance, TK rubs his hand against his chest, attempting to dig in and soothe the ache he feels there. He startles when he feels Tommy’s hand move his and the end of a stethoscope press gently over his heart. She looks calm, professional, but there is a current of worry that runs through her as she frowns while she listens.
TK can feel the too fast beat that stutters in his chest, the rhythm feeling out of control. He’s been ignoring the growing tightness, the way it’s harder to take a steady breath, and the dizziness too. He knows he’s being stupid, that he should admit what he’s feeling, but admitting it will make it real and he’s scared. He’s only a few months off of severe hypothermia, cardiac arrest, and the weakened state his heart was left in the aftermath. He’s terrified that the consequences of this event will mingle with the effects of that past and leave him stranded out at sea again.
Before either him or Tommy can say anything they’re stopped in the ambulance bay and a crowd of medical personnel are helping guide their patient out. Tommy takes over relaying the status as she follows them into the Emergency Department.
TK follows slower, his whole body beginning to shake with the forced adrenaline. He is startled by a presence at his side as Nancy wraps an arm around his waist to steady him. He hadn’t realized how bad he was swaying and swerving until he’s being guided to the nurse’s desk by her.
Steph, one of the regular ED nurses glances up at them from her paperwork. “Hey Nancy, TK how’s your shift?” she asks with a bright smile.
TK flashes her a tight smile back, nausea starting to roll through him. “Hey Steph, TK here decided to fall in front of an epi injection. He apparently doesn’t get enough adrenaline on the job.” Nancy answers and TK can tell she’s trying to force a joking tone to cover her lingering guilt and worry. “Is there an open room we could take?” she asks more subdued. Upon hearing the situation Steph turns to TK with the assessing look of a nurse triaging a patient. She motions for them to follow her and leads them quickly into an open exam room.
“How long ago was the stick? And how much epinephrine was administered? She asks all business as she wraps an automatic blood pressure cuff around TK’s arm and begins to unbutton his uniform top to apply leads for an ECG.
“Approximately 30 minutes and 0.3 mg” Nancy answers.
Steph nods as the BP machine beeps with the read-out, it’s turned away from TK so he can’t see the numbers, but based upon the feeling in his chest and the look on Nancy’s face he knows it isn’t good.
“Nance?” TK asks, voice shaking. She just looks at him and he can tell she’s trying really hard not to fall back into the past too. She reaches out to grab his hand, squeezing tight.
Just then there is a swift knock on the door and a doctor enters, TK zones out as Steph updates the doctor, until she steps directly into TK’s line of sight.
“TK” she says and he glances at her, knowing it’s not the first time she’s said his name. “I’m going to administer some medication to help counteract the effects of the epinephrine. Your blood pressure is too high and we’re worried about the arrhythmia we’re seeing on the ECG. Okay?” TK nods attention turning to the doctor as she sits on the rolling stool in front of him, placing a stethoscope to his chest and begins asking him questions about his symptoms. He answers them as best he can, trying not to spiral into his worry.
Nancy’s phone rings from where she stands next to him, she grabs it out of her pocket, flashing the screen in his direction to let him see that it’s Carlos calling. She exits his exam room to answer the call as Steph hands TK a hospital gown asking if he’ll be able to handle changing on his own. He grimaces as he takes the garment, but nods his head.
“How long until you think I’m getting out of here?” He asks her as she moves to step out of the room.
“Sorry TK, but I think you’re in for an overnight observation at the very least.” TK sighs, as the door closes behind her. He’s not surprised, but still dreading even more time spent in a hospital room. He’s halfway through removing his uniform pants, struggling a bit with shaky hands when Carlos slips into the room. He closes the door quickly behind him as he sees what TK is doing and quickly moves to help TK sit on the edge of the exam bed while he pulls his pants off the remainder of the way.
They work together in silence to get TK dressed in the familiar hospital gown and Carlos gently tucks the stiff hospital blanket around TK’s legs.
“I’m sorry.” TK starts, regret and pain heavy in his voice. Carlos’ eyes shoot up to his surprise clear on his face. Carlos searches TK’s eyes for something, before raising a hand to cup his cheek.
“You have nothing to apologize for. This was just an unfortunate accident.” Carlos assures him.
TK sighs, rubbing a hand at his chest again. The ache is persistent despite the medications he’s been given and TK feels tired in the familiar way he remembers from just after his hypothermia. Before he can come up with a response the doctor from earlier is entering the room again followed by Dr. Soryal, TK’s cardiologist.
“Hello again TK,” Dr. Soryal greets him with a smile, “Can’t say I’m happy to see you considering the circumstances.”
“No offense doc, but me neither.” TK answers back, earning a small smile.
TK endures yet another exam and answers questions about his symptoms. He’s honest about his chest pain and feeling tired and off; not happy about the look his honesty puts on Carlos’ face, but knowing it’s imperative he doesn’t hold back anything. The doctor doesn’t look surprised at anything TK describes, but confirms Steph’s earlier assertions that TK will be submitted to the cardiac unit for monitoring at least overnight. TK groans even while accepting his fate. He manages to convince Carlos to go home and change during his room transfer by asking him to bring back some real food. They’re both completely over hospital food at this point it isn’t even funny.
Getting settled on the cardiac floor is a painful experience of deja vu. It hasn’t been long enough in TK’s opinion since he left this place. The familiar sights are causing his skin to crawl with anxiety, which in turn causes his heart rate to begin to spike again. He’s wishing he hadn’t worked so hard to convince Carlos to leave when Nancy steps through the door with a tight look on her face as she fidgets nervously at the foot of his bed.
“Nance.” TK says and he knows she hears him, but she remains still, not looking up. “Nancy!” He says more forcefully, earning a glance up and his heart hurts at the tears in her eyes. “Come here,” he says softly gesturing to the side of his bed.
“This isn’t your fault.” He says with conviction when she refuses to move.
Still Nancy stands still, but her face gives away her disbelief at his words. “I was literally holding the needle in my hand.” she answers incredulously.
“Come here, please” TK insists again and it gets Nancy moving. She stops just at the side of his bed refusing to look at him.
“This isn’t your fault.” He repeats slowly. “And neither was the ice storm.” He hasn’t actually said those words to her before, too wrapped up in recovery and getting back together with Carlos to see the pain and guilt Nancy was carrying around with her this whole time. Now that he sees it though he needs her to know that he doesn’t blame her and that neither event is her fault at all. The ice storm was all on him and this is all on bad luck and timing.
His words crack something in Nancy as she sinks into the chair beside his bed and places her head in her hands, tears running freely down her face. TK reaches out to take her hand and pull her closer to his side so he can wrap an arm around her. “It’s not your fault.” he murmurs again.
“You saved me then. And you helped me stay sane during the entire break-up.” TK admits. No he never really talked to anyone about the break-up, but he did lean on his friends during that time. Especially Nancy. She was a constant in his sea of change and he knows her friendship is the kind that matters.
He looks up as Carlos steps back into the room; his boyfriends eyes are moving around the room taking in the familiar surroundings. It’s not the same room as last time, but it looks the same and TK knows it’s bringing back all sorts of memories and feelings for all of them. Carlos, ever prepared, had thankfully brought enough food to feed more than three and Nancy is happy to stay through dinner. They don’t talk any more about the difficult things, choosing instead to focus on being together.
When Nancy leaves, Carlos slips his shoes off and curls up in the too small hospital bed next to TK. It’s something they had done a few times during TK’s recovery when certain nurses were on who they knew would look the other way. “Patricia’s on tonight.” Carlos explains, and TK laughs. Patricia is an older woman, with wrinkles around her eyes and a kind smile. She fell in love with Carlos during TK’s last stay and was notorious for letting him get away with just about anything.
TK sinks into Carlos’ embrace, soaking in the warmth and comfort he finds there. Now that the initial effects have worn off and TK is starting to feel the crash, he wants more than anything to fall asleep and wake up in the morning feeling better. Coming down from this adrenaline high is hard. It has left him exhausted and jittery in sync. Neither helped by the way his heart still just doesn’t feel right. It’s no longer beating so hard that it feels like it’s going to pound right out of his chest, but the rhythm feels off. He glances over at the ECG readout from the instrument he’s still attached to and despite the fact that he’s feeling off, he’s still startled to see the uneven rhythm echoed back on the readout.
Carlos follows the path of TK’s eyes, worry reflected back when they turn and look at each other. “I’ll be okay.” TK assures him softly. Leaning up slightly to kiss the bottom of Carlos’ chin. Carlos tilts his head down to capture TK’s lips against his, the kiss is soft, tender, full of all the love they feel for each other and so much different than the tentative kisses they shared the last time TK was here that it makes TK’s heart swell. It feels like Carlos is physically healing his broken heart.
They wake the next morning at nurse shift change. Patricia’s knowing smile as she checks TK’s vitals one last time and lets them know that Evy is on shift this morning. TK groans and Carlos jumps off the bed so fast he ends up banging his shin against the arm of the chair sitting next to it. Patricia just laughs at them, but brings happy news when she tells TK she is pretty sure he’ll be getting released this morning.
TK thanks her warmly and nods sheepishly when she tells him that although she likes them both she really doesn’t ever want to see them in her hospital unit again. She is correct about him getting released though and soon enough TK’s being pushed in his dreaded wheelchair by a quiet Carlos out to the car.
They’re silent the whole time Carlos helps TK in the car and then makes his way around to get in the driver's seat. “Going to tell me what’s on your mind?” TK asks as they begin the drive. Part of their therapy has been making sure they check in with each other more. They’re both still free to tell the other that they’re not ready to talk about something, but they’re not free to lie and say something is wrong and it’s obvious to TK that something is wrong.
“It was just hard seeing you there again.” Carlos admits. He looks lighter the further away from the hospital they get and TK understands. It was hard for him to be there also.
They spend the rest of the drive talking about random things, it’s comfortable and light. They’ve found a new solid place in their relationship and TK revels in it. It suddenly hits him that he’s ready to share it again too. Part of the reason they haven’t hosted a game night, or been to family dinners is because TK wasn’t ready to share what he’d only just gotten back. Now it feels selfish, to have kept Carlos away from people he loves just because TK was making up for time he lost. Time they lost.
“What would you think about hosting a 126 game night this weekend? Also maybe having our parents over for dinner?” TK asks as they get settled on the couch in the loft. Carlos looks over at him with one eyebrow raised, “I don’t know if you’re up for hosting babe?”
TK has to admit there is some wisdom in that, but now that the idea and thought is in his head he can’t let it go. “True, but I bet once everyone learns about my accident they’ll be dying to come visit.”
“Too late for that.” Carlos tells him, pulling out his phone and allowing TK to see the messages as he scrolls through them. There are messages from everyone at the 126 wishing him well and offering to bring food over, as well as multiple messages from Andrea Reyes demanding to know when they are home so she can come make sure with her own eyes that TK is okay, followed by several from Gabriel and even Owen.
Confused, TK pulls out his own phone. There are several messages there as well from the same people wishing him well and to keep in touch, but no mentions of stopping by. Carlos seems to understand the thread of thought TK is having.
“Babe, no offense, but you’ve been a little forceful in your communication that you didn’t want people here. I thought maybe you were just embarrassed during your recovery, which you had no reason to be by the way. But then it continued and honestly everyone stopped bothering you and started bothering me.”
TK is shocked. The last thing he wanted to do was push anyone else away again. “Tell them yes.” He says urgently, pushing Carlos’ phone back towards him. “Tell them all yes. I want them here. I want to have game nights and host dinner and show off how much I love you.” TK is getting more emotional than the situation probably warrants, but it’s been a long 24-hours. Carlos seems to understand this and doesn’t argue, just kisses him lightly on the temple and starts typing out some replies on his phone. TK leans his head in the space on Carlos’ chest near his shoulder watching as everyone he loves confirms that they would love to come visit for this event or another.
Not surprisingly their first visitor arrives a mere hour later and Andrea Reyes storms into their home laden with grocery bags full of food. She waves him down as TK tries to get up from the couch to greet her, rushing instead to set her bags down and go over to him. She sits down next to him on the couch, pulling him into her almost urgently, wrapping tight arms around him. “Mijo, you really are trying to make true the jokes everyone makes about you being a danger magnet.”
“Not my fault.” He protests weakly even as he buries his face in her soft sweater in embarrassment.
“Shhh, Si Mijo, I know. We just worry about you is all.” She assures him, pulling back to look him over with her intense gaze.
He lets her look, knowing that it will make her feel better to see with her own eyes that he’s here, whole and mostly okay. “I’m okay.” he tells her softly.
“You will be.” She contradicts and she moves to go help Carlos unload the rest of the bags in the kitchen.
Nancy shows up next. Andrea is still there, cooking with Carlos in their kitchen as TK naps on the couch. TK wakes up to the sound of soft voices floating through the loft and Nancy coming to sit next to him. He shifts to pull himself up to sit, running a hand through his messy hair.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” Nancy replies, “You look better.”
TK feels better too, the nap having helped a little, but he knows it’s the warmth and love of having family filling his home again that’s helping the most.
“I’m sorry.” He whispers and Nancy looks supremely confused.
“You’re sorry?”
TK nods, taking a moment to gather his thoughts. “I know I haven’t been the best friend since before the break-up and you’ve been there for me so much. I hadn’t even realized that I was still shutting you out even now and that’s not what I want, so I’m sorry.”
“Let me stay for some of the delicious food Mrs. Reyes is cooking in your kitchen and you’re forgiven.” Nancy tells him with a smile.
He’s happy to agree, shaking on the terms of their deal and falling into easy conversation with his partner and friend. He knows that everything isn't magically okay, but it’s an amazing feeling when he realizes that as long as he has Carlos and Nancy and the rest of their friends and family, TK knows everything is going to work out just fine.