Work Text:
Here it is, the climactic finale to the already climactic finale: the kiss.
This isn’t just any kiss (as the italicized and definite article clearly shows); it’s the culmination of every single moment shared between Luz and Amity up until now, every violent battle, every awkward glance, every tender sympathy.
And now, after defeating the big, bad, and inarguably evil Belos, they’ve reached the tipping point in their relationship, and all signs lead towards the same destination, the passionate summit of the mountain of character development that lay behind them:
“And as they looked deep into each other’s eyes, and subsequently each other’s souls, they knew what they both were feeling. Luz took Amity in her arms and pressed her lips against the other's—”
Pressed her lips against the other's? That’s not very, what’s the word... epic? That’s just a normal kiss, and this is no normal kiss. This is the kiss. Fans will rave about the romantic subplot’s astounding conclusion for years to come! It deserves the most legendary wording ever read by anybody, ever before, ever after, and especially ever during. Let’s try that again:
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and with all the passion she could muster, delivered—”
I’m sorry, delivered? Is the kiss a package? Did Amity use Amazon Prime’s two day shipping guarantee, perhaps? No, Amity did not use Amazon Prime’s two day shipping guarantee, thank you very much. She’s not receiving the kiss, they’re both receiving, and giving, and it’s beautiful, and wonderful, and incredible, and some other synonym that in essence means “good” that I can’t think of right now. Once more, from the top:
"Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and with all the passion she could muster, provided—”
Provided? Really? Is Amity an elderly woman at a retirement home? What other synonyms are there? Supply? Fulfill? Administered? Is this medication? Well, kind of (that’d be super deep), but no! It’s not medication, it’s mutual! You don’t give your nurse an IV (at least I hope you don't)! Yet again:
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and, with all the passion they could muster, shared—”
Shared! Shared, shared, shared! That’s mutual! That’s beautiful! Continue!
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and, with all the passion they could muster, shared a kiss—”
A kiss? A kiss? This isn’t indefinite, this is the kiss! I can’t write that they shared “the kiss” (because that’s way too self-aware), but what else can I do? Use extremely convoluted synonyms? Well, it’s safe to say “they smooched”, “they snogged”, and especially “they osculated” aren’t going to work.
Hmm. Would describing it be better?
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and, with all the passion they could muster, shared a kiss, their lips smacking—”
No.
“their lips slapping—”
God, no. That's even worse.
“their lips thumping—”
“their lips thwacking—”
“their lips walloping—”
Definitely not. You should be ashamed of yourself, thesaurus.
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After some thought, I’ve decided that conventional descriptions aren’t my forte.
Should I pull a The Princess Bride? “Since the invention of the kiss, there have been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind.” I don't want to plagiarise, though a little inspiration couldn’t hurt.
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and, with all the passion they could muster, shared a kiss that was ranked #3 on Forbes’ ‘top 10 kisses’ list—”
“shared a kiss that made even Belos's decapitated head in the corner of the room go ‘awwww!—’”
“shared a kiss that gives you no reason to watch the show any further—”
Yeah, no. Maybe I could say something along the lines of:
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and, with all the passion they could muster, shared a kiss so powerful, so pure, that mere words cannot describe its beauty.”
Well, that’s just plain boring. There has to be an alternative.
Mere words might not be able to describe its beauty... but can onomatopoeia?
“Luz took Amity in her arms, sweeping her off her feet, and with all the passion they could muster, squish!—”
“splat!—”
“pow!—”
“fyoom!—”
“bang!—”
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After some thought, I've decided that writing isn't my forte.