Work Text:
The Weasley’s Birds And Bees
“ Today is the day,” Ron announced to his wife as he handed Hermione her morning coffee. I am finally going to give Hugo “the talk.”
“Do you think that it is really necessary, “ Hermione asked. “ He is a smart kid after all.”
“Thank Merlin that both of our children have inherited your brain, “ Ron replied. “ But it’s tradition. The eve before starting our first year dad would sit us down with each of us to discuss sex.” Ron blushed as he remembered how his own sex talk went with his dad. It was awkward listening to his father as he stumbled through his speech despite having given it four times before. “Besides, I am prepared.”
“ You are,” Hermione asked in a teasing voice remembering how nervous Ron was when they first time discussed the subject.
Ron nodded, “ Percy helped me with the visuals and everything,” knowing how eager his older brother was about continuing the tradition even though he only had daughters and therefore was never given the chance to give them “that talk.” I even enlisted George to help with the euphemisms.
Hermione raised her eyebrows at him knowing how her brothers-in-law were. “Good luck with that,” she said before kissing him goodbye.” See you later dear,” as she said as she headed towards the floo. “Tell me how it goes.”
“You got this,” Ron told himself before heading to their son’s room. Taking the piece of parchment out of his robe, he knocked on the door.
“Come in,” was the muffled replied.
Ron opened the door to see the eleven year old reading one of his mother’s old books. Even as a young child he was a vicarious reader. “ Do you want to play some chess,” he asked feeling like that would be the best way to approach the subject,” I’ll even let you be white.”
“In a minute, “ he replied, “ I am almost done with this chapter.”
Ron smiled, glad that at least one of his children inherited his love for the game. Setting up the board he waited for his son to finish his reading. A dead ringer of his father at that age, the sun shone off his red hair as he finished his chapter. Putting his book down, he sit down across his father. Bright blue eyes stared back at him, as Hugo made his first move. “What did you want to talk to me about dad?”
“How did you know that I wanted to talk to you,” he asked.
“Because we always play chess when you want to talk.”
“Right, “ Ron answered not surprised that the perceptive boy picked up on his patterns. “ You see, when two consenting adults, “he said, empathizing the last two words, “really love each other…”
“Are you going to give me the sex talk, “ Hugo interrupted. “You really don’t need to. Penis, sperm, vagina, ovaries, eggs fertilizing. Make sure to use conceptions every time before engaging in any sexual activity. I already know all this. I do have older cousins, you know.”
“But it’s tradition.”
Louis told me about that too. Don’t worry dad, I won’t do anything until I am ready.”
Ron sighed knowing that his baby boy was right. “I just worry about you is all. You’re growing up so quickly and I just wish, that you were still the little boy who needs me.”
Hugo face softens. “I am always going to be your baby boy,” he replied, “Even when I move out and discover a cure for lycanthropy.”
Ron smiles knowing that his baby boy is right.” I love you son.”
“I love you too dad.”
“So, how did it go,” Hermione asked as the couple laid in bed that evening.
“Good,” Ron answered leaning over to kiss his wife, “ We have pretty great kids.”
Hermione smiled after returning the kiss. “Indeed we do.”