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“Let’s do this fair and square with no hard feelings, okay?” Shikadai smiles.
Boruto fist bumps him. “Yeah”
The brunette feels something odd, but today is odd all around, right?
“You didn’t… When we fought, did you?” His voice quivers for a second.
Just one look to his friend and he knows the truth…
But then all hell broke loose and it wasn’t the time. Not on the arena, not in the hospital, not with Naruto gone and all the emotions flying high. Not with his pride still bruised…
He apologized. He didn’t even know why, but when he caught himself the words have already fallen out of his mouth (his mother genes, his father says…). He apologized for the lack of time to talk with him, to support him, to mend things. Growing up sucks and he feels it now. He has no time for games, to laze around, to talk to his friends.
Out of sudden, he feels like a stranger in their lives, playing catch up between missions and reports, storming out of lunches and dinners, rushing to and from birthday parties.
He misses them. He misses Boruto’s crazy plans, Inojin’s ramblings, Chocho’s infinite chats.
So he apologizes to him and them forgives him and they laugh madly on the top of the train and he’s 12 again and everything feels just like before and everything in his world is okay for a moment.
But late, at night, that nagging feeling on the pit of his stomach is still there. And he knows that he’ll have to address it someday… What a drag…
Shikadai felt the presence a couple of seconds before hearing the tentative footsteps.
He smirked without opening his eyes. Like his parents, he's pretty good identifying people by their chakra signatures, the sound of their feet and the way they move. He knew who the person was, but he didn't move, he waited. He never knows what to expect for him, so he waits to see, a little smirk on his lips.
It took a couple of minutes for him to feel movement again. "Shikadai?" He raised an eyebrow, that hesitant tone doesn't suit Boruto at all… Yup, he’ll die without being able to predict this troublesome guy.
"Yeah…" He received silence and shuffling of feet as answer. "What a drag!" He sits up and looks at the blonde boy. "Come on, sit down and spit up! What's the problem?"
Boruto sighed… This is harder than he thought. He can't find the right words.
"You want to talk about some troublesome matter that will cut short my nap time." Shikadai stated and laid on the grass again.
"I-I-I… Yeah… How do you know?" He stammered. “I can come back later…”
"You didn't say a word since you came here. Actually, it took you more than a minute to drag yourself here. You keep moving your feet and you didn't look at me once. You're uncomfortable. So, after all that happened, it's obvious that you want to talk about it and you don't know how to do it." He opens his eyes to look at the other boy who keeps looking at his feet. "Bothersome… I told you to sit down! You're blocking my clouds…"
The Gennin drops on the floor next to his friend. "Sorry… But you had your eyes closed, you weren't watching clouds…"
"That's not the point… You were creeping me out… Being so still and so quiet doesn't feel like you…"
They stay in silence for a minute. "Look, Shikadai… I-I-I don't know what say to you…"
"So, don't say nothing…"
"You're saying that you don't want to speak with me?" The boy mumbles. "I understand…"
He starts to get up, but a hand pulls him down again. "Bothersome… Don't put words in my mouth, dumbass! I'm saying that you don't need to say anything. It's fine. You already apologized." He sits to look his friend in the eyes. "Let's move on! This is a pain…"
"Everything is a pain to you…" The other boy sighs. "I really should apologize again… And you really should be pissed with me…"
"Hmm… Probably… But that wouldn't change a thing…" Shikadai shakes his head. "Look, you did a stupid thing. A really stupid and dangerous thing. But, in the end, none of us got hurt and I passed the exam. So, why dwell on this? It's done, it's behind us, let's move on… Maybe next time, I'll be the one doing a stupid move and you'll have to forgive me…"
"You never do stupid things… You think about everything beforehand… Ten moves ahead, right?"
"Oh great… Now I have to live up to that…" He sighs before looking at his friend. “Everyone does stupid things, ultimately it will be me…”
“But not like what I did…”
“Oh come on! We’ll be doing this dance for how long?” Shikadai lays on the grass and closes his eyes to hide the scowl that is forming. “Troublesome…”
“You are pissed with me!” “Boruto exclaims. “I can see that!!”
“So what if I am?? Nothing changes and it will eventually go away.”
“You are my best friend!! I don’t’ want you to be mad at me!”
“You should have think about it before betraying me, right?” He sits up straight and he feels blood rushing on his ears. “You just thought about yourself, like always! You could have talk to me! You could have asked for my help! You could have trained harder! Damn it!!! You know all my moves!!! Why would you need to cheat???? Against me of all people??”
Boruto is astonished by Shikadai’s outburst. He’s usually a much laid back person, he doesn’t remember the last time he saw his friend raising his voice or losing his temper. For a minute, he just stares, mouth slightly agape at him.
Shikadai is panting. It always takes a toll on him to lose it like this. He has some of his mother’s temper, he knows, but he has his father’s demeanour and arguing is not his favourite thing. To be honest, he avoids it at all costs, generally running off, beating around the bush or simply letting things go.
But you know what? He is hurt! Really hurt. That nagging feeling on the pit of his stomach? It’s the pain of feeling betrayed.
Boruto is his best friend. He hates this term, like this is some sort of competition, but it’s the truth. He loves his craziness, his wild plans, his funny remarks. He’s childish and (too much) energetic and keeps Shikadai on his toes to make sure that he doesn’t do something too drastic and sometimes he’s too much and too troublesome. But he still loves him to bits. And there wasn’t a single time in his life that had leave him with a bad memory.
Gosh, this was the kid that run away from home at 4 years old just to cheer him up when his mother was in hospital. This was the kid that after being caught and grounded, cried and begged and pleaded to stay with him “just a little more, pretty please daddy?? I won’t play games until forever, but just a little more?”
This was the kid that skip classes with him, pulled all-nighters playing videogames with him, trained with him.
Boruto is the closest thing he has from a brother. And yet… He did this…
“Shikadai…” He starts.
“No, don’t, okay? Let’s stop talking about it. What is done is done, I forgave you, all is fine and dandy. Drop it…”
“No it’s not! You are mad at me! And you are right! I cheated on you! You have the right to be mad!”
“I know that! And I’m not mad, Boruto…” Shikadai rubs at his eyes. “I’m hurt. I’m really hurt… If it was against anyone else, I would disapprove, but okay, I would get it… But me?? If it was so important to you to win, I would even let you win!!! Why didn’t you just talk me???”
“You said that you wanted to fight fair and square…” He mumbles.
“You had a cheating device with you!! How did you plan to fight fair??”
“I… I don’t know… It was just in case…”
“In case of what??? You have, what? Three, four times more chakra than me? Just keep out of my shadows reach and tire me out! You did it thousands of times when training!”
“You are a wind user! You could have knocked me out!”
“So do you, idiot!!!! Come on!!! You just wanted to impress your father with a super amazing technic!”
“And what? Didn’t you?? Oh your mommy would be super proud if you didn’t pass!!!”
“My mother would be fine if she saw me fighting right! She just want me to have my head in the game and do my job with fairness and honesty! I don’t need to impress her, she knows very well what I’m capable off. That’s why she pushes me so I don’t laze around.” Shikadai sighs. “Look, we won’t be getting anywhere with this… We will just keep arguing, saying things that will hurt us even more and in the end will hurt our friendship. Let’s just stop…”
“You are still hurt! I want to mend things…”
“And how do you want to do it? Travel back in time?” He spits, sarcasm dripping from his words.
“Shikadai… Just…” Boruto seems deflated. “Look, I’m sorry, and I’ll be forever sorry for what I did to you. I know I shouldn’t have. Not to anyone, but especially to you …”
Shikadai just holds his stare and waits.
“You are my best friend since… Since we were born! You are like my brother, sometimes even more than Himawari! We can’t be like this… Not now when everything is upside down and the whole world is just a mess… My world is a mess…” He takes a breath and stares at the ground. “I need you in my life. You keep my world less chaotic and my head straight and my feet on the ground… You call me on my bullshit…”
“Like you listen to me…”
“I do!!!! I really do!! I just… Look… I suck, okay? I’m a shitty person and a spoiled brat and I don’t deserve you. You are smart and honourable and the best friend someone can have and I betrayed you. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I need it. More than anything right now!”
“And now you’ll drop on one knee and ask me to marry you?” Shikadai snickers. “What a drag… Why I have so many drama queens in my life?” He just sighs and falls back on the grass, an arm covering his eyes.
Boruto can see he’s thinking and just waits.
“I held my deer and cried, do you know that?” Shikadai doesn’t move. “I cried that night… No one knows this, not even my dad. I didn’t sleep at all. I just cried until the sun came up. Like a kid. That’s how hurt I was…”
A pink tint tinges Boruto’s cheeks. “Me too, Dai…” He hesitates. “I still do… I keep trying to fall asleep, but I always fail… I sleep with my fox too… Or my dad… Or both… If it makes you feel better…”
“Second hand embarrassment doesn’t make me feel better. I have my own…” Shikadai is tired of this. “Look, I really forgive you, okay? I don’t cheat and I don’t lie and you know that. I just need a little time to lick my wounds and move on…”
“Yeah… I get it…” Boruto lies on the grass with him. “Can I… Can I see you in the mean time?”
“I never forbid you to be with me. Just… Don’t talk about this anymore… Not if it’s not absolutely necessary.”
“Okay…” He stays silence for a minute. “Are we still friends?”
“I never stopped being your friend…”
“But for real? Are we?”
“Yes, Boruto, we are.”
Silence falls between them for a few moments. But never for long with the blonde…
“How are things? Being a Chunnin… How is it?”
“A drag and I hate every minute of it and I still have to do it… And on my day off, I have a troublesome blonde knucklehead pestering me” Shikadai smirks.
“Ahah very funny!” Boruto punches his arm.
"How are things going? You went all MIA on us…"
"Still grounded…" Boruto mumbles, his cheeks becoming pink. "No games, no friends, no getting out the house, just missions…"
"Ouch… That's harsh…" Shikadai makes a face.
"Yeah… Hokage's son, remember? I'm supposed to be an example…"
The brunette snorts. "Kazekage's nephew, advisor's son, diplomat's son… Yeah, I get it… My mom is always nagging me about that…"
"At least, your father is all cool… He gets you… Even aunt Temari… She’s hard on you, but just because you’re lazy"
"I’m not lazy, I just don’t waist energy. And don't say it like that… Your dad is awesome…" He sighs. "You know they are just busy… They work hard… And it could be worse…"
"Now, you're sounding like Sarada…"
"Thanks a lot!" He returns Boruto’s punch. "But she knows what she's talking about… Look at her father… That guy is never around… He never was…"
"But he's super awesome! He knows so many jutsus and does hand signs with one hand and he hits the targets every time! Did you see him fight?? That’s true power!"
"Your father too. And your mother. And mine. Their generation is a hundred times better than ours, if we don’t work hard… You only say that because he taught you a couple of moves…" The Chunnin cuts him off. "And because he's not your father… I bet she would trade all this awesomeness for having him around more…"
"Hmm… She doesn't know how lucky she is! Sometimes, I wish he was my dad…"
"Lucky, hun? Do you? Do you want a father that's never home? Yeah, our fathers come home late, but they come home every night." Shikadai looks at him. "So, you want a cool dad rather than a dad who's there for you every day? Who was there on the first day of school and on your graduation? Who tucks you in bed and say that everything is okay after a nightmare?" The other boy opens his mouth, only to be cut off again. "Oh, don't even deny it, you just told me that you sleep with your dad! How many times do you think that Sarada wanted to have her dad home? To have him reading her a story or playing with her or taking her to school? To sleep between her mom and her dad, knowing that nothing could get to her?"
Boruto loses his words for a moment. His friend is right… To be honest, he's right most of the time. But this time, he hit the nail in the head. They are the lucky ones.
"I was an ass to everybody… To you, to her, to my dad…" His voice sounds strangled and he looks down. "I don't even know how to… How to apologize… How to make up to you…"
"You never learn… I told you already. We are fine. You don't need to make up to me." He closes his eyes. "And for the others… You can stop arguing with them and start spending time with them… You are always picking up fights with Sarada and your father… What a pain…"
The blonde snickers. "I'm not that bad!"
The other raises an eyebrow. "Really? You painted the Hokage's Monument just to bother your dad…"
"He did it, too! More than once!"
"You are totally like him!"
"And you are just like your father!"
"Thanks!"
They start laughing, finally everything started to fall in place, just like it was before.
"So… for how long will you be grounded?"
"Dad says a month, mum says that 'we'll see'…"
"A month? We need you to play, we are in the middle of a mission…"
"I know… Sorry…"
"Nah, it's fine… We wait for you, don't worry."
Boruto gets up and starts getting back. He looks to his friend. "Shikadai… Hum… Thanks!"
"Any time…"
He looks at the clouds.
Yes, he knows he should be mad. But he's not like that. And his father always say that friends are the most precious thing in life… Maybe the old man is right… He's usually right about those things… He just wish that they don't always come to him for advice… That is bothersome…