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Megumi and Yuji were together. Sleeping in the streets. Shower? They haven't had a proper one nor been eating a proper meal and drinking clean water. Both could not care less. Keeping only in mind their plan and goal.
"Fushiguro…" Yuji called Megumi beside him. They are sitting on a bench. There's a two shallow gap between the two. Cold windy night, post light empty street, and pitch black starry night sky. A ghost town lurking with cursed spirits. Endless exorcism. They haven't rested yet. But thankfully their wish is granted to get a break, even if it's just a while.
Megumi is already looking back at Yuji who has no idea that Megumi is observing him. Megumi scanned Yuji's features, his facial scars, he was reminded of the horrible trauma he got in the battle. Despite the lack of source of light Megumi can still distinguish Yuji's darkening circles. It is still the same Yuji he knows but the bright aura Yuji always gives is gone, lifeless and scarred.
October 31, 2018. The date where their lives changed and everything turned into a nightmare. They're only 15 when all of this happened in just a blink of an eye, already fighting for their lives, always in a life and death situation, no assurance for tomorrow and still figuring out how to keep each other alive. They're only 15.
"It's getting late. You should take a rest for today." Yuji continued. "I know it's uncomfortable to sleep in this place—"
Yuji's babbling was cut out, he always recalls the fact that they're sleeping in the streets and feels sorry about it. Yuji just won't take himself a break for blaming everything on himself.
"I don't mind." Megumi interrupted. "I don't mind even if it's a rock."
Megumi doesn't mind, as long as Yuji is around, as long as Yuji is with him, as long as he's alive, that's enough. Megumi just won't say it out loud.
"Oh, okay." Yuji already got it. He tried but a smile refused to come out of his lips.
Megumi has enough. Megumi couldn't take it any longer. The thing he once feared the most is now happening in front of him, the thing he thought he could avoid is now what he is actually witnessing.
Yuji blaming and slowly losing himself to everything that gone wrong.
Megumi's stomach got a weird feeling of twist, almost close to the thing they called 'butterflies in my stomach' but it's a different story, it came from Megumi's intense fear and heightened anxiety.
But what can Megumi do about it? He can't force Yuji to be alright. If there's a thing he could do it is to be with him, no matter what happened, like what he is doing right now. He will stay by Yuji's side no matter what happens.
"Fushiguro?" Yuji noticed Megumi's slight reaction from what he felt from his stomach.
"What?" He replied with his usual thug voice. Megumi acted like nothing happened. But right after seeing Yuji's worried expression it makes it harder to hide.
"Are you alright?" Yuji insisted. "Are you hungry? Is there something wrong with your gut?"
It seems Yuji knows Megumi too well, too well for the short amount of time they have been together.
"I'm alright." Megumi affirmed, looking away as Yuji got closer to him.
Megumi's sake. That's how it is from the past five days. Yuji's top priority is Megumi's sake.
"You see, I can't afford if something happens to you." Yuji said in a serious manner. Not so Yuji, for Megumi. Megumi stared at him with eyes wide open. "I don't know what to do if I lose you." Megumi's mouth gapped. "Fushiguro, you're really a reliable person." Yuji stares back at him, crooking a bit of a smile.
Arrhythmia. Megumi cursed himself in his mind for feeling his heart palpitation. Yuji always does this, always complimenting him in the most unnecessary and unexpected times.
"Thank you." Yuji said in a wistful smile.
Yuji says what he wants to without holding back, without regret, knowing anytime it could be his last. What's important for him is that he lets the person know how thankful he is. How much the person means to him. How much he loves and cares for him.
Megumi did not blink, pupils dilated, only darted in Yuji's smile. Not knowing that the picture of Yuji in front of him will be engraved in his memory. His cheeks fired up, he continued cursing himself inside his mind wondering why he would feel this way towards Yuji.
"That's why you need to sleep, Fushiguro."
As usual. Yuji.
Megumi sighed heavily, he could not relax especially in this situation. How can he sleep? Not knowing what tomorrow could bring and the heavy weight of pressure pressed on his shoulders. He is tired but not enough to make him go to sleep.
They are both tired.
"Haven't you slept yet?" Megumi simply asked in a calm tone.
Megumi considered it rude to ask but it was already late when he realized, knowing how Yuji is.
He can't even calm down Yuji whenever he gets a panic attack.
Recently, Megumi witnessed Yuji's body shaking uncontrollably, particularly his hands and feet, he'll sweat a pail, he will get sudden chills, and sometimes vomit out of nowhere. Yuji tries his best, covering his mouth to keep himself from hyperventilating. Megumi witnessed Yuji's sore eyes from crying, snot nose, cursing himself to death, sobbing until he can't speak clearly as he blames himself.
Megumi saw it all. Seeing Yuji suffering by his side and yet he can't do anything to save him breaks him into pieces. He can't help but to blame himself, because he believes it is his fault, everything that happened to Yuji is because of him. If only he was not that weak, Yuji would not have swallowed that damn finger, he believes.
But even if that is their case Megumi tries his very best to keep Yuji together. And he will keep on trying, until Yuji fully calms down.
"I do sleep." Yuji answered knowing Megumi knows he barely sleeps.
Yuji did not face Megumi after answering if he slept or not. Yuji leaned his back on the bench and stared at the limitless sky above them. Full moon. The night sky.
Megumi somehow felt relieved.
Yuji is still beside him, his relaxed and serene expression as he stares dearly at the night sky, it relieves Megumi. Seeing Yuji like that Megumi couldn't ask for more, even if it's only temporary.
"Fushiguro, I know, I'm a liar." Yuji sighed. "I tried not to disturb your sleep but I'm such an idiot."
"Itadori."
"I'm sorry." Yuji softly glared at Megumi. "It's… just… sleeping is so hard to do." Yuji continued.
"It's fine, I'm not bothered at all." It's not like Megumi can sleep peacefully after what happened in Shibuya. "Like I said, I don't mind. Just don't go off like that by yourself, Itadori."
Yuji can't help but to shrink himself in his hoodie as he lean his back as he sits at the bench. Megumi saying something like this makes him admire Megumi more. Yuji's cheeks reddened, feeling it becoming warmer than ever , cursing himself inside his mind wondering why he would blush through what his best friend Megumi said.
Megumi copied Yuji's position, he leaned his back as he sat on the bench with Yuji, it felt good actually, Megumi looked up at the night sky.
Now both of them look upon the night sky. The sky seems to be forgiving from Yuji's perspective.
It is filled with bright stars, the full moon at the center and its calm scene providing the two a moment of peace, just for a while.
"Fushiguro…"
"Hm?"
"I'm happy you let me play with your divine dog." Megumi just kept listening to Yuji. Megumi summons his divine dog knowing how happy Yuji is with it, he summons his divine dog and it somehow helps Yuji to calm down." But I want you to rest while we're unsure of what will happen next." Yuji continued.
As Megumi said, he's trying his best. He wants to help Yuji. But if it's Yuji's request, he'll accept it. Not like it is stopping Megumi fully.
Yuji just endured the silence as Megumi did not reply, as expected to Megumi.
" The moon… it's beautiful." Yuji commented innocently while the silence was still going on between them. "And the stars, it feels unreal." Yuji continued staring at the night sky.
And Megumi is looking at him, staring as Yuji is busily admiring the night sky.
Yuji being genuine in Megumi's sight.
"The stars seem to have a pattern." Yuji continued questioning the stars he saw having their own rhythm in the sky. "Letter W." Yuji said as he stared at the stars in the night sky.
"That's a constellation called Cassiopeia." Megumi finally talked. Yuji turned his head and found Megumi's usual expression, he is now staring at the night sky.
"Cassiopeia? Haven't heard of it." Not like Yuji is the type of student to care about astronomy stuff.
Megumi's forehead creased not looking back at Yuji.
"I basically don't know what a constellation is and what it is for." Yuji continued.
"Constellation is a group of stars, they form patterns or pictures of."
"Fushiguro, you seem to be interested in that kind of stuff."
"Not really."
"So that W patterned star is called Cassiopeia." Yuji was amazed, he would keep it to himself now every time he looked at the night sky.
Yuji suddenly comes closer to Megumi. All Megumi can do is stare in shock. Like a jumpscare.
"I can only remember the little dipper now that I recall it." Yuji said in front of his face.
"You mean, Ursa Minor."
Yuji was left dumbfounded, he didn't know what it was and just heard it for the first time, he just literally forgot it was taught in school.
"You seem to be interested in this stuff." Yuji can't help but to be awestruck as Megumi talks about stuff he has never heard (he just did not pay attention to it before at school) but piques his interest. And Megumi seems to be passionate as he speaks which Yuji adores.
"I used to read about it." Megumi shared. Tsumiki taught him, he reminisced.
"Isn't there a big dipper too?" Yuji tries to recall because that's the only thing he remembers about constellations. "Because there's a little dipper." He scratches his head.
"It's called Ursa Major." Megumi replied. Yuji's eyes show it all as Megumi stares at him, his eyes beaming with interest in the topic and Megumi is aware of it.
"Fushiguro, you're so smart." Yuji compliments all over again, he won't get tired telling it to Megumi.
Megumi was about to talk to the constellation and share more information about it with Yuji.
"—" Megumi hadn't said what he was about to say when Yuji leaned his head on his shoulder. Megumi's heart thump more loudly and doubly than before as he felt Yuji's head pinning in his shoulder. Afraid Yuji might hear his heart beating loudly.
"Tell me more about it. About the stars." Yuji requested.
Megumi's flushed cheeks and stiff body as he felt a hit of electricity when Yuji lay his head on his shoulder. "Seriously, you don't know what a constellation is?" Megumi submissively submitted and let Yuji lay his head on his shoulder.
"I'm ashamed it is true. Is it that important?" Yuji looks upon Megumi as his head is still on his shoulder. Yuji's eyes expand after finding how incredibly long Megumi's eyelashes are from his angle, like an angel, it's so pretty he was stuck staring at it. Megumi is so immaculate. Yuji's heart rapidly beats. "The stars become interesting when you're the one talking about it."
"Really?" Megumi surprisingly asked.
"Yeah."
Megumi fulfilled Yuji's request while they both stare at the night sky and Yuji's head is still on Megumi's shoulder, leaning softly and comfortably.
In their current position it is best for Yuji to hear Megumi's voice thoroughly, well enough to remember it and engraved it in his memory that even if he has a hearing problem and become deaf or far-away he will still recognize it is Megumi's voice.
Their closeness, thighs beneath the fabrics touching each other lightly, Yuji's hands brushing in Megumi's hand while Megumi busily talks about his knowledge in constellations not only in constellations but the whole astronomy as well.
Yuji's pinky finger brushing Megumi's hand while listening to him talking. Megumi's hands look tender to touch, feminine like, his fingers are long and slender unlike Yuji's. Yuji fights the urge to hold Megumi's hand considering he might make Megumi uncomfortable if he did it without his consent, which is a big no for Yuji.
Megumi turned a blind eye to Yuji's pinky finger grazing his hand, knowing how comfortable Yuji is at their current position.
"Megumi…"
Megumi stopped halfway as he talked quietly about the stars when he heard Yuji's sleepy voice called his name softly.
Did he just hear Yuji call his first name?
"Itadori—"
"Your voice… I like it. I love listening to it."
Megumi hadn't opened his mouth for a while, no compliment hit him harder than this when he felt Yuji's head get heavier pinning his shoulder. In their position, Megumi could hear Yuji's breathing clearly, indicating he is alive, he is right beside him, close and breathing.
Yuji sleeps, safe and sound in Megumi's shoulder. Megumi looked tilting his head a bit carefully, not releasing himself from the moment. Megumi stared at Yuji's pretty light pink eyelashes and features with his scars.
Yuji's little 'Hmm' 'Woah' 'Really?' and Megumi can hear it certainly. Especially the 'Fushiguro'.
Megumi knows even if he has a hearing problem and become deaf or far-away he will still recognize it is Yuji's voice.
It was too early, too soon, too sudden for them. They're too young for this. The world is too cruel. But in this moment despite everything that happened Megumi smiled from the bottom of his heart knowing Yuji is right beside him. Even if he knows how tomorrow will haunt him. Even if everything feels uncertain between them. Even if it's only for a while.
"Yuji." Megumi called him by his name as he leaned his head against Yuji. Megumi felt Yuji's fluffy pink hair brushing against his cheek but he didn't mind it being a bother.
Megumi stared at Yuji's hands laid freely, Megumi didn't hesitate to cup those hands with only his one hand. Finally, Yuji slept. Megumi rubbed his thumb against it, feeling Yuji's rough yet delicate warm skin on his hand.
Yuji's warm scent. Megumi rubbed his cheeks evenly in Yuji's head burying himself in his pink fluffy hair. Seconds later Megumi fell asleep holding Yuji's hand.