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The witch doctor (Naomi's term) had Xander strip naked in the the fenced-in yard. The witch doctor wore a necklace of bones, probably chicken bones, considering the number of them pecking around. Occasionally, he would leap, yell or otherwise vary from the low grumbling chant, driving the pollos loco and making them try to fly away. The bones would clink with every movement, bouncing of the faded t-shirt commemorating the 1987 Pulaski, Ohio 10K fun-run.
This guy is dancing around him and he's naked. Not of the good.
There are three slayers in the inland. There are also scary guys with guns, who want to take power from the scary guys with guns who control the coast and the government. Xander needs a piece of paper to pass through to the inland and give his spiel. Beyond that point, if he's shot by the scary coastal guys, the scary guys from the coast will tell the ambassador that they're sorry that the inland guys killed an American. It could also mean summary execution if the inland scary guys see it.
This doesn't explain why Xander's serving as the witch doctor's stripper pole.
There have been fairly explicit solicitations of bribes in the sweaty hot government building, and initial attempts to satisfy them, but Xander has been trying to avoid that. Substantial bribes make him a target of theft and kidnapping. Substantial bribes bring him more solicitation of bribes. Substantial bribes cause people wonder what's going on makes the substantial bribes worth it. Worst of all, substantial bribes cut into his funding, which, thanks to Giles' shaking of trees, is sizable but not ready for Substantial-Bribe-Mas day presents to every wide, white smile he sees. But, it seems, this Deputy Minister for Nepotistic Affairs didn't get a pony last Substantial-Bribe-Mas, and likes to open his presents the night before. And the Embassy had been of so much help. The Charge d'Affaires, the number two man at the embassy and a seasoned diplomat, had called Xander "fucking crazy" for wanting to go up there.
So Tabu suggested that a ceremonial cleansing would help, get luck and the gods on his side. Xander response was "What's the worst that could happen?"
Experiencing shrinkage in front of Naomi. Not necessarily the worst, but it would certainly hit the board on Family Feud.
Then Mr. Bojangles grabs a corked Coke bottle with something that he can smell from 10 feet away. Survey says!
"What'cha doin'?"
The bottle smashes. The witch doctor drops the bottle and then it smashes. It smashes and it stinks worse than anything Xander's smelled before. Including Dawn's attempt at lasagna. It falls through Willow's hands and then smashes. Not through like a ball going through a bad wide receiver's fingers. Through like thin air.
"Whoops."
Willow's hair is still long, longer than Sunnydale. She's evidently been out to the beach a lot, because she's freckling a little and wearing a pale green bikini that shows off all frecklable skin, and a lot more.
"Hi." Willow's standing, hands at sides, smiling at the witch doctor. "You don't know me, but there was this thing about two years ago? They tell me I starred in a few dreams for people with power. I kinda looked like this?"
Her looks changed from red hair, freckles and green bikini to black hair, veins and black bikini, then back.
Another puddle forms at the witch doctor's feet.
"You know the story! That means I don't have to go into the long and boring exposition which is good because I still get a little guilty over most of it because no matter how much what I did to Warren was cruel and unusual he still deserved to ...."
"Will?"
"Oh yes. I'm the villain of the story. He's the hero. The world saver. In my book? He gets respect, not a hazing by someone like you."
The witch doctor stands there, mute, until Willow says "Boo!", when he runs.
Willow turns to Xander. "I see you're not glad to see me."
"It's not that. I'm just ... surprised, I guess."
"No." Willow looks down. "You're not glad to see me."
"Please. Don't start." Xander fig-leafs his hands and backs up to his clothes. "I don't recall you showing that much skin back then."
"Much easier glamour to pull off. It isn't easy being here."
"I thought you were powerful."
"It's not the power. It's like, holding three tennis balls is easy, but juggling them? Not so much."
"Speaking of being here, why are you here?"
"Naomi called on your sat-phone, saying she thought that guy wasn't being serious. She sounded cute. What does she look like?"
"You are not going to mack on my people."
"Seriously, what does she look like?"
"Lisa Bonet. She looks like later Cosby when she married the navy guy. Long braids. No nose ring, though."
"That is cute." Willow pulls her legs up, indian-style, and floats about two feet above the ground. "Does she have huge nipples like Lisa Bonet?"
"Willow."
"What? You're the one who rented Angel Heart!"
Xander pulls up his boxers and grabs at his jeans. "I have to work with this woman! I wouldn't be able to talk to half these girls without her! I don't want to talk about her like that."
"But..."
"But." Xander pulls his jeans up and buckles the belt. "Sometimes she wears tank tops. Exactly like Lisa's. Like the first joint of my ring finger and I can't believe I'm talking about this."
"You should tap that."
"Will!"
"I'd go for it."
Xander sits to pull on his socks and ties hls shoes. "You'd wait for it to come to you."
"OK. Maybe." Willow starts fiddling with her hair. "It's just that we're worried about you.
"'We' should stop worrying. How's the boy supposed to learn, Ma, if we don't let him make mistakes?"
"So we're taking this as a mistake?"
"I'm wondering which it was. Trusting someone with 'witch' in the job title, thinking Tabu has ever had a good idea, or..." -- Xander stops to pull on his t-shirt, a once-black one with a pocket on it --. "...letting Naomi ever have access to your telephone number."
"Y'know, a girl could feel bad with you talking about her like that. Might not want to visit so often. I'm delaying a trip to the beach to project myself here!"
"You'd think a person might've figured that out by now." Xander winks his good eye and smiles. "Seriously, it was great to see you."
"I'm happy to see you, too."
"I can see that."
And Willow turns red, crosses her arms in front of her, and fades away.