Chapter Text
Getting into an elevator with both Elric brothers is only marginally better than getting into an elevator with Roy Mustang, Envy thinks. He’s in absolute fucking despair. He hadn’t even wanted to go to the office that day, but no, Wrath had to see him. Wrath, of course, had absolutely nothing to say beyond snide remarks and questions on Greed’s whereabouts, which Envy lied through his teeth about. Of course Envy knows where Greed is; his older brother takes delight in teasing him, even if he left the family business. He also knows where Lust is, but Wrath still thinks she’s dead.
That is neither here nor there. Envy is busy staring down Edward Elric, who scowls at him.
“What are you doing here?”
“None of your business, shrimp,” Envy sneers, and Ed snarls wordlessly. Alphonse claps a hand on his brother’s shoulder but frowns at Envy regardless. Good. It’s not like Envy wants the younger brother to like him any more than he cares for the elder of the two.
“Why is everything so difficult with you?”
“Why do you make everything so easy?” Envy’s on point with the insults, which always makes a good day. Edward’s hackles are firmly raised, which is satisfying. But it is a twenty-two floor elevator ride, so Envy turns his back to the brothers and shrugs. “Wrath asked for me. He had nothing to say.”
“Oh.” God, he’s ineloquent, isn’t he? It’s a shame that Edward is attractive, Envy thinks, unbidden. Irritated with himself, he jams a thumb into the lobby button again. “Your uncle is a dick.”
“Mm.” Envy hums, neither agreeing nor disagreeing. It’s true, but Envy loathes making things easy for Ed.
“Mustang wanted to check in on our latest progress.” Edward is reaching out, and Envy is a bit touched, but he’ll be damned if he ever admits it.
He flips his ponytail. “I didn’t ask.” There’s quiet for a moment as Ed sighs. Envy can picture him raking a hand through his own ponytail. Elevator music plays softly. Finally, he gives a little. “And how is your progress, Elric?”
“Oh.” Edward sounds surprised. That’s fine. Envy still doesn’t face him. “It’s okay. Medical alchemy is complicated, but our contacts in Xing have been really helpful. In more ways than one,” he adds, snickering.
“Ed!” Alphonse whines, and Ed laughs outright. Envy has nothing to say to that. The siblings have always made him uncomfortable, ever since they came to the office.
Officially, Wrath runs the office. Unofficially, his brother, Envy’s father, has a lot to say about the goings on of the place. Unofficially, Roy Mustang has his eyes set on the top, grabbing at more power every day. Envy doesn’t really give two shits about the business, especially after Greed and Lust left, but he’s still beholden to his father and uncle in some respects.
Envy had been the one to show the Elrics around on their first day, at his father’s behest. Something about the two being geniuses and useful tools and all that. He’d promptly screwed it all up when the first thing he’d asked Ed was why he was so short.
He got into a fistfight that day.
Luckily for Envy’s father, the Elrics had stuck around for the past few years to do alchemical research for the man. They’ve been looking into regenerative alchemy, both for the sake of the pharmaceutical company they work for and for the fact that both brothers lost limbs in a childhood accident that Envy doesn’t know the details of.
The elevator stops abruptly just after floor fifteen, and Envy catches himself on the wall with a start. The light flickers, shudders, then blinks out, leaving the three in darkness.
“What the fuck?” Edward snaps. Hands touch Envy’s back, and he flinches away.
“I didn’t do anything!” It sounds like whining even to Envy’s own ears, but he’s not concerned with that. Feeling for the seam of the door with shaking hands, Envy tries not to acknowledge the murmuring brothers at all. This is not a situation he ever wanted to be in, especially not with these two around. When he finds the door, he tries to pry it open with his hands but breaks a nail. “Shit,” he mumbles, sucking on his finger. It doesn’t help the pain, but still.
“What? You okay?” A hand finds his back again, but Envy violently shrugs it away again.
“I’m fine,” he snaps. He’s touched again, insistently this time.
“You’re shaking.” This time he knows it’s Edward, because his eyes are adjusting and the man is only a foot away from him. His grip is iron, though he’s using his flesh and blood arm to grip Envy’s slim wrist.
“Shut up, Elric. I don’t want to be trapped in an elevator with you is all.”
Edward doesn’t let go, but his grip slacks into something close to gentle. Envy’s heart speeds up, and he tells himself that it’s fear and not excitement buzzing there.
“I’m not a huge fan of being trapped in an elevator either, but we might as well sit down. We aren’t going to die in here.”
“It’ll be fine,” Alphonse chimes in. The younger brother settles on the floor with a sigh, massaging the places where his legs meet automail.
Envy feels claustrophobic. His lungs refuse to cooperate, and his brain conjures scene after scene of being locked away in a dark room, screaming his fool head off for food, water, acknowledgement.
Perhaps Wrath had called him here to engineer this exact scenario, just to remind Envy of his childhood. Maybe that was a vindictive thought, but Envy wouldn’t put it past the man.
Edward’s free hand migrates to Envy’s lower back, and he herds him gently to the corner and sits him down. Envy scowls but can’t find it in himself to lash out when he’s focusing on taking a breath.
“You’re alright, Envy,” Ed tells him, authoritative but gentle, twining their fingers together. Envy feels like his heart might burst, pounding away in his chest.
“I hate the dark,” Envy blurts out, then frowns. “No, I mean… It’s not the dark. It’s the whole thing. It’s small, and dark, and I can’t get out.” Instantly, he feels stupid. He thunks his head on the wall behind him, but Ed’s grip on his hand just tightens into a squeeze.
“Which is completely fine. But you’re not alone, and we’ll be out soon.” Maybe it’s the way Ed talks as if he’s absolutely certain all the time, but the words help. Envy nods and turns his attention back to forcing himself to breathe while Ed strokes the back of his hand with his thumb. His hand is warm.
Alphonse shuffles over to sit on Envy’s other side. He doesn’t take Envy’s hand, thank god, but the presence is nice all the same. “We’re going to grab lunch after this, if you want to come,” he says, gently nudging Envy. He tries not to flinch.
“Maybe,” he allows, and Edward squeezes his hand again. Envy pretends not to notice the grin on Ed’s face when he squeezes back a little.
Above their heads, an intercom crackles to life. Envy does flinch then, edging closer to Ed until their legs are pressed together. How pathetic can he get?
“Hello? Is anyone in elevator two?” The voice crackles over the speaker, but it sounds like Riza Hawkeye.
Alphonse scrambles to his feet and feels around the panel of buttons for a moment. “Hello, yes. Can you hear me?”
“Ah, Alphonse. Yes, I can hear you. Are you alright?”
“Yes, Miss Hawkeye. It’s me, Ed, and Envy in here. What’s going on?”
“Something happened to the other elevator, so we had to shut both of them down for a bit here. It shouldn’t be any longer than ten to fifteen minutes.”
“Okay, cool. What happened to the other elevator?”
“It got stuck for a minute, so we have a crew checking on the cables for both elevators now. You will all be fine, I promise.”
“Thanks, Miss Hawkeye. Let us know if there’s anything that comes up.”
“Got it. Thanks, boys.”
Distantly, Envy thinks that Riza seems much more relaxed when she talks to Alphonse as opposed to him.
Alphonse sighs as he settles back on the floor with them. “I’m hungry,” he mumbles, petulant. Envy would laugh if he weren’t struggling to maintain his composure already.
“Shut up; you’re gonna make me hungry too.” Ed reaches across Envy to smack his brother, initiating a slap fight with Envy in the middle. He can’t help it then; he laughs. Ed freezes, letting Alphonse get a solid smack to his older brother’s face. Envy stops laughing, completely embarrassed, as Ed stares at him. So he doesn’t laugh often, sue him. Not genuinely, at least. He sounds stupid when he laughs, anyway.
“I’ve never heard you laugh before,” Edward says into the quiet. Alphonse chuckles.
“I’ve heard him laugh at your expense plenty of times, Ed.”
“Shut up! I meant like that, y’know?”
“Stop it.” Envy shakes his hand free and crosses his arms to sulk. He’s grateful the dark hides his heated face. “I hate laughing.”
“What? No, no, we’re not laughing at you. It’s nice! You have a nice laugh.” Ed rambles a little, waving his hands. Alphonse laughs outright. Envy wants to believe him but doesn’t; instead, he presses himself more firmly to the wall with a scowl. “Oh my god; you don’t believe me at all.”
“Nope.” He pops the ‘p’ with relish, trying not to sound bitter. Ed groans, and Envy struggles not to like the sound.
“Dammit.”
Nudging against Envy’s side, Al smiles gently. “No, he really means it. Ed is, unfortunately, extremely blunt.”
“It’s one of my best qualities,” he whines.
“Is it really?” What? Envy’s curious! Maybe he wants to know what he thinks his best qualities are. In reality, he’s mostly just trying to steer the conversation away from himself.
“Oh, I dunno. I think so. I don’t sugarcoat things.” Arching his back, Ed stretches idly. Envy hears the pop. “What about you then, Envy?”
The plan has backfired. “My hair,” he answers, because that’s always his answer. Envy’s hair is beautiful, and he is proud of it. That probably wasn’t what Edward wanted from him, but it’s the truth.
“I don’t think hair is a quality,” he presses. “You do have nice hair, though.” Twitching, Envy stares at his left knee and forces himself not to let it bounce. Manicured nails dig into his palms.
“Close enough.”
“You have to have something.” God, the blond is stubborn. Envy remembers why he finds him annoying, again. Can’t believe he almost forgot.
“I don’t, so just drop it.” The snap comes out as harsh and angry as it’s meant to, but the Elrics both shake their heads.
“You’re incredibly stubborn,” Alphonse offers, and Envy snorts.
“Is that supposed to be a compliment?”
“Yes,” he fires back, knocking Envy’s knee. He can’t think of anything to say to that, so he stays quiet.
“You never let anyone get away with bullshit.” Ed yanks his arm until he unfolds them, then takes Envy’s hand again. Why? Why are they being nice to him? Worse yet, why does it make him feel good? Even so, Envy doesn’t pull away.
“You’re just full of shit so I call you out. There’s a difference.” It’s a desperate attempt to take back some control of the conversation, but it doesn’t have the desired effect.
“I’m not full of shit, but we’ll come back to that. Envy, the point is, you may be manipulative and frustrating–” Envy tries to pull his hand away, but Ed just grips him tighter. “--But you’re also strong and a fucking terrifying force of nature. I respect you, Envy.” Envy is full-on squirming now, trying to get away from the two of them, but the brothers are like stone. They block him in and force him to listen to nice things that they’re probably just making up on the spot–
The lights flicker on, and the elevator jolts. Ed lets go of Envy to cover his eyes, so he launches to his feet and across the elevator. The door dings and inches open, and Envy slithers out as soon as he can fit through the gap. He refuses to admit that he’s running away, and also that he’s on the wrong floor.
Taking a moment to right himself, Envy ducks into the nearest bathroom and runs a hand through his hair. Okay. So he embarrassed himself in front of the Elric brothers; so what? It could always be worse. All he has to do is get out of the building. He can wait for a new elevator.
Karma gets his foolish ass after only a minute. Surprisingly, it doesn’t come in the form of the Elrics. It’s his nephew. Envy’s sitting in a plush chair by the elevator, dicking around on his phone when Pride emerges from the fucking babysitting station. What kind of office has a children’s area? And why, oh why, did Envy get off on this floor again?
“Envy,” the boy sneers, “what a pleasure. What are you doing here?”
“Waiting for the elevator. Buzz off, brat.”
“I meant in the office, loser. Aren’t you usually busy being a disappointment?”
“Aren’t you usually busy killing neighborhood cats?”
Pride hums and examines his nails. Neat, of course. Wrath wouldn’t settle for anything less. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“If I could ship you off to a psych ward, I would.” Envy doesn’t like kids. Never has. Maybe it has something to do with his own fucked up childhood, but he doesn’t care. Plus, Pride is genuinely evil, and that’s coming from Envy.
“Cute. Should I call Dad? Tell him you’re bothering me?”
“I already saw Wrath today. Call him if you want.” Does Envy want to see Wrath a second time? Of course not. But Pride will play nice if his father is around. And the kid is making him want to take the stairs, which Envy does not do.
“You’re no fun. I’ll have Dad invite you and Uncle to dinner tomorrow.” Pride’s voice is sweet, but dammit, the words are shit. Envy scowls.
“I have plans,” he lies, and Pride raises an eyebrow.
“You do? With who?”
“Edward Elric.” Oh, now Envy is in trouble. Pride will ask Edward, just to be difficult. Which means that Envy has to make dinner plans with Edward Elric tomorrow night.
The boy’s face is stormy. He already isn’t Ed’s biggest fan, and to have his machinations thwarted is a strike against him. “That sounds fun,” he spits. “Enjoy your date.” The boy marches back into the children’s center before Envy has a chance to argue. Conveniently, the elevator arrives right after he leaves. Envy curses it under his breath for not having the decency to arrive any sooner.
Karma continues to punish him as he arrives at the ground floor to find that Ed Elric has abandoned his brother to wait for Envy. He stands when Envy arrives, frowning. Envy avoids his gaze but doesn’t try to escape. He’s already in trouble, after all, and now he has to beg the man to take him to dinner or something.
“Yo.”
“Hello, Elric.”
“You ran off.”
“I wouldn’t say that.”
Ed sighs. “I’m sorry if I pissed you off or something.” The blond shoves his hands into his pockets. “I didn’t mean to, really. I just… You’re not so bad.”
“You can make it up to me,” Envy says, refusing to process the warmth in his body that Edward’s words cause. “Take me to dinner tomorrow night.”
Ed’s gaze snaps up and he laughs a little until he realizes that Envy isn’t laughing. “Really? Dinner?”
“What’s so weird about that?” Envy fires back, but Edward shakes his head with a smile.
“What’s weird is that you don’t like me.”
“Did I say that?” Envy’s being pedantic, sure, but that’s not the point. The conversation isn’t tense, just matter-of-fact. It’s almost like banter, which horrifies Envy.
“Not in so many words, but I tried to be nice to you and you ran away.”
“I didn’t run away.”
“Keep telling yourself that.”
There’s a brief silence. Neither will look each other in the eye. Once again, Envy softens, caves.
“If I don’t have a reason to be out of the house tomorrow night, I have to go to a family dinner. I used you as an excuse already, so you might as well make me honest for once.”
Edward contemplates it for a second, then shrugs. “Yeah, I guess I can do that. Pick you up at seven if you text me your address.”
“Gimme your phone.” With that, Envy gives him his number. He holds the phone just out of his reach and grins. “What are we eating?”
“You either have to choose something or give me my phone back, that’s the rules.” The blond has a sour look on his face, so Envy gives his phone back. He hates choosing for other people. Edward’s face has nothing to do with the decision.
“Surprise me, then.”
“Fine, shithead.” Ed sulks, unsurprisingly, but he does offer a smile before he turns away. “See you tomorrow. Seven o’clock.”
As he walks away, one step heavier than the other, Envy stares at his back.