Work Text:
“Oh, God. Pick up, you lazy volcano!”
Snow Miser muttered under his breath while pacing back and forth, telephone in hand. He was getting antsy. Heat Miser always answered his calls, no matter how important it was, which it almost never was. And now that Snow Miser needed his brother’s advice, he was nowhere to be seen. The snow god continued to panic internally, until his twin brother finally responded.
“Jeez, can’t I enjoy a single day without you bothering me?” Heat Miser grumbled on the other end. Snow Miser would let out a sigh of relief.
“I know, I know, but this is important!”
“You said the same thing yesterday. I had to listen to you ramble on about how Mother wanted you to stop making everything snow during spring.” Snow Miser could hear how annoyed his fiery twin was. He knew Heat Miser would hang up if he didn’t get straight to the point.
“Brother, I got a mortal pregnant.” Snow Miser blurted out, hitching his breath. He waited in fear of what his twin would say. But both ends were completely silent. If Hell really did exist, Snow Miser was definitely going. “I just wanted to participate in the mortals’ culture. Everything happened so fast, I didn’t even know it happened until it was over-“
“I’m coming over. Do not tell Mother about this.”
*
The last thing anyone expected was for Heat Miser to be comforting his brother. For all everyone else knew, the Miser Brothers absolutely despised each other. But that didn’t mean he was going to let Snow Miser deal with this alone. Heat Miser found himself being the much more mature one. While Snow Miser was blending into human society and accidentally getting women pregnant, Heat Miser was out fixing these problems. At least, trying to.
“I found some herbal teas the mortals use to kill the parasite without it harming the host.” Heat Miser stated, pushing a small box towards his snowy brother. “Just give this to the mortal with the demigod fetus, and it should be enough to terminate the pregnancy.”
“I feel bad killing an innocent baby.” Snow Miser sulked.
“Would you rather have Mother know about your… fondling?” Heat Miser asked, which immediately sent Snow Miser into a panic. There was no way the snow god was going to lose his title as Mother’s favorite. Snow Miser quickly took the box out of his brother’s hands and gave a sad smile.
“I appreciate your help, Brother.”
“As much as I despise you, I still care about you enough to help.” The two had attempted to embrace one another, but were quickly harmed by the opposing sibling. “Jeez, I give you my help, and this is the thanks I get?”
“Me? You should mind your temperature, Hotcakes, especially in my domain! You melted me, for Christ’s sake!”