Work Text:
After the tenth time Nicky set him up on a date, Andrew made a rule. It was pretty simple really. And it was the funnest way for him to judge whether or not a guy was worthy of his time. Every time, no matter their location, Andrew would ask the other dude the weirdest questions. Their answers, funnily enough, could reveal how interesting they were. So far none of them had passed the test. Not even one.
Today, Nicky had organized another date for him with a guy called Neil. Andrew didn’t know anything about this Neil other than the fact that he was somehow friends with Nicky. That said enough about him. Their date was supposed to take place at a nice cafe, close to Andrew’s house. At least he would be close to home in case he needed to make a run for it. It was a fair assumption that this guy would be a total weirdo. He is willingly friends with Nicky after all.
As soon as Andrew walks in the cafe he immediately spots Neil. Nicky had told him he’d know who he was the minute he saw him. He has scars you’ll recognise him, he’d said. And he did. Neil has messy auburn hair, falling in curls, framing his face, and magnetising icy blue eyes. His face is in fact covered in scars but Andrew couldn’t help but find them interesting. He has a thin but muscular frame and he is wearing a t-shirt and a pair of short running shorts. Andrew notices his face is flushed. There was no other word for Neil other than pretty. And hot. Neil was unnecessarily hot.
Andrew makes his way to where Neil is standing at the counter, ordering his drink. However, the minute Neil sees Andrew his expression turns sour.
“You’re Andrew?” Neil asks.
“Yes.” Andrew replies, confused by Neil’s attitude. And weirdly not annoyed by it. “And you’re Neil?”
“Right. Look, I’m not really interested in this. Nicky is just kinda of an asshole and–”
“Nicky is my cousin.” Andrew cuts in, pretending to look offended for the fun of it.
“Oh.” Neil says, some of the fire leaving his eyes. “Well, still. I’m tired of him setting me up on these stupid dates. Can we just get this over with?”
Andrew stares at him. Neil has already turned out to be interesting and Andrew hates it. Couldn't he just be a pretty face and nothing else? No, he had to make his life difficult.“Sure.”
Some sort of relief washes over Neil’s face as he turns towards the barista and orders a black coffee. Andrew looks at him, disgusted. “Plain black coffee? Seriously?”
Neil actually lets out a laugh. It makes him look younger, and his eyes shine. “Let’s see what you’ll order then.” He challenges.
Andrew shoots him a look and asks for his regular, while he maintains eye contact with Neil the whole time. “A chocolate milkshake, with whipped cream, caramel syrup, and sprinkles.”
For a minute Neil stares at him, completely stunned, his mouth hanging open. And then he bursts out laughing, his shoulders shaking, and all the tension leaving his body. “And you made fun of my order? Yours is ridiculous.” He manages after he calms down.
“It’s actually called having taste.” Andrew corrects him. Neil looks like he wants to add something but in the end he decides against it and turns towards the bar again.
Their orders arrive and Neil shakes his head, grinning as they both pay for their drinks. They find a table and sit opposite of each other. After a few delicious sips of his milkshake, Andrew decides it’s time for his game to start.
“So, Neil.” He casually says. Neil looks up from his coffee and raises an eyebrow in question.
“What would you do if you found a dead body in a hotel room?”
Neil doesn't miss a beat. “Well, that depends. If it was someone I was friends with then I’d have to do an investigation and find out who did this to them. Then I’d hunt them down, and take revenge by killing them. Preferably slowly. If it was a stranger I guess I’d just leave it there or maybe call the police or something.”
Okay, fuck Neil for being interesting. “You’ve killed before?”
Neil nods. Andrew doesn’t think it’s a lie. “Me too.” He admits.
Neil looks surprised for a second, before nodding again and taking another sip of his coffee.
Andrew continues. “What music would you choose to play every time you walk into a room?”
“Why would I ever want that? How could I ever sneak up on people like that? Or walk into a room without wanting to draw attention to myself or talk to anyone?”
Andrew can’t help the strange attraction he feels. Neil is getting more and more interesting with every passing minute and his eyes are so blue Andrew could drown in them. He has an endearing aura, which is so captivating that Andrew can’t look away. Neil is a magnet and Andrew is the piece of metal getting pulled into his magnetic field.
Andrew goes on. “If you punch yourself in the face and it hurts, are you weak or strong?”
“If you punch yourself in the face you’re a fucking idiot. Why are you asking all these questions?”
“Don’t you think it’s fun?” Andrew asks. Neil looks half confused and half amused. The look suits him. But then again Neil could pull any look and Andrew absolutely despises how his mind works.
“Uhm, I guess.” He pauses for a second. “Can I ask too?”
Andrew nods, too curious to decline. Neil is the first to actually match Andrew’s energy and Andrew hates that.
“If there’s an ambulance on its way to save someone and it knocks down someone, would it stop to help them?”
Andrew blinks. “An ambulance wouldn’t run over someone. Shouldn't they know better?”
Neil smiles. “Wrong. And I actually have proof.” He points to himself. “They left me on the fucking street, can you believe that?”
“It was probably because it was you. I’d run you over on purpose, too.”
“Oh, wow, thanks.” Neil pretends to be offended but he still can’t hide his smile. Andrew has the urge to turn his face away with his palm so that he won’t have to look at him, glowing like that. Fuck his smile.
“What hair color do they list on your driver’s license if you’re bald?” Andrew asks next.
Neil chokes on his coffee, laughing so hard tears well up in his eyes. “Are you trying to kill me?” He says between breaths.
Andrew decides that to hear that laugh again he’d run miles. And he really, really loathes running. “I thought we’d establish that I’d kill you the first chance I got.”
Neil rolls his eyes, a smile permanently stuck on his face now. “Nah, I actually think you like me.”
“I hate you.” Andrew corrects him.
“Liar.”
Andrew ignores him. “Is it a hostage situation if a person with several personalities threatens to kill himself?”
“That is literally not how DID works.” Neil says, and actually sounds annoyed.
“Yes, idiot I know.”
“Which side of the armrest is really yours at a movie theater?” Neil asks him now.
“Easy.” Andrew takes another sip. “Both.”
And there’s that laugh again. “Why is it so difficult for women to apply mascara with their mouths closed?”
“It’s not. I’ve done it plenty of times.” Neil says casually, like the image of Neil wearing mascara, making his blue eyes pop did not just send Andrew into cardiac arrest.
“Why aren’t you wearing some now?”
“Isn’t it obvious that I was on a run?”
“No. I just thought you had bad taste in clothing as well as in coffee.”
“My taste is perfectly fine, thank you very much.”
“And who goes on a run before a date?”
“I told you I didn’t care about it.”
Andrew pauses. “Didn’t? Now you do?”
The idea that Neil might actually be interested in Andrew makes his heart skip a beat. He hasn’t felt like this for anyone in..well, ever. It is a weirdly nice feeling but terrifying at the same time. Andrew is not sure how to feel about it yet.
Neil takes some time to answer, looking at Andrew like he’s trying to solve a difficult math problem. “You’re not that bad.” He settles with.
“You are that bad.”
“You wound me.” Neil says, like he doesn’t believe that Andrew thinks he is that bad, which is unfortunately true.
Time passes and the more Andrew gets to know Neil the more he hates him. And by ‘hate’ he means ‘likes’. Neil has a way with words, and a fiery attitude that at times manages to leave Andrew a little speechless. He’s funny in a dry way, but Andrew can also tell that there is some kind of story behind Neil Josten. The scars give away some of it, and Andrew knows he’d kill whoever gave him those scars.
It’s a scary feeling, especially since he’s known Neil for only a few hours, but he can’t help but feel protective over him. Not in a possessive way, but in a ‘I want to hold him close and keep him safe’ way. It’s truly shocking how quick Neil managed to get through Andrew.
When it’s time to say goodbye and call it a night Andrew remembers Neil’s earlier words. Wanting to know if they still apply he brings them up, careful not to push. “Well, Neil, it was horrible getting to know you. Pity we’ll never see each other again then.”
Neil’s smile disappears in an instant. He looks at Andrew like he just threw a knife to his heart and Andrew regrets his words. He could have just asked. But he didn’t want to pressure Neil into agreeing to meet him again. Then again, Neil wasn’t afraid to say no if he truly wanted to.
“Oh.” He says, and it sounds sad, and Andrew hates himself a bit more. “I thought–I mean okay, if that’s what you want.”
Neil turns to leave and Andrew curses under his breath, at his stupidity. He reaches out, caughting Neil’s sleeve in his hand, not wanting to touch skin in case Neil is uncomfortable with that. Andrew would know.
“Neil, wait.” He calls out, and feels the relief wash over him when Neil stops walking and turns back around to face him.
“It’s okay. We had fun. At least I did, but we don’t have to see each other again. That wasn’t the plan anyway.”
Andrew wants to punch him. Maybe that’d knock some sense into him. The problem is, he’d rather kiss him instead. “No. That’s not what I–”
“You don’t have to explain yourself, Andrew. I understand.”
Before Andrew can open his mouth again, to answer, and explain what he actually meant, Neil has already turned his back on him, and is walking away. Andrew calls out his name, once more but this time Neil doesn’t stop.
And Andrew wants to stab something. Or someone. Preferably, himself. That was a new level of stupid, even for him. He’s always been extremely self destructive, but this? This was completely unnecessary. He sits down on the pavement, lights a cigarette and stares at where Neil used to be. He’s fucked up again.
Fuck.
The next day, when Andrew wakes up the first thing he does is call Nicky. He himself doesn’t have Neil’s number but Nicky surely does. And Andrew is not giving up that easily on the first person who managed to capture his attention so quickly. Bee would certainly be proud of him. That’s only a bonus.
“Andrew!” Nicky sounds surprised Andrew called him, which makes sense, since he rarely does. “How is my favorite cousin doing?”
Andrew knows Nicky also calls Aaron his favorite cousin but he doesn’t comment on it. “I need Neil’s number.” He goes straight to the point, not wanting to waste any more time.
“What? I thought you didn’t like Neil.” Nicky says, a confused tone to his voice.
“Who said that?” Andrew asks, wondering if Nicky already talked with Neil.
“Neil did.” Nicky explains, as predicted. “Wait, he’s wrong?”
“Why else would I be asking for his number, Nicky? To prank call him?” Andrew says, sarcasm dripping from his tongue.
“But you said you didn’t want to see him again. That’s what Neil said.”
Andrew rolls his eyes, even though Nicky can’t see him. It’s a natural reaction at this point. “Neil is an idiot. I never said that.”
“Okay?” Nicky says, but it sounds more like a question. “I’ll send it to you now.”
“Good.” Andrew says, and then hangs up on him.
A minute later he gets a notification and finds a text from Nicky calling him an asshole and giving him Neil’s phone number. Without overthinking about it, he clicks on the digits. It rings a couple of times before Neil picks it up.
“Hello?” Neil asks, and Andrew’s heart skips a beat or two. Maybe three, but no one needs to know that. The effect Neil has on him is unimaginable. And really annoying. No one should be allowed to have that much power over him. Not even the cute redhead with the attitude problem.
“Neil. It’s me, Andrew.” He clarifies.
There’s a pause and Andrew is bracing himself for the sound of the line going off but Neil just lets out an “Oh.”
Andrew is not sure what to make of this reaction. It’s not good but it’s not bad either. The ‘oh’ could mean literally everything. But Andrew is not having this conversation over the phone. Not when he can’t see Neil, see his facial expressions, or read his body language. Besides, how is he supposed to kiss him like this?
“Are you free today?” Andrew asks, hoping the answer is yes.
“What?”
“You didn’t mention having a hearing problem. Are you free or not?”
“Uhm, yes I am. Why?”
Yes, Neil is in fact an idiot, Andrew decides.
“Why would I ask if you’re–you know what, forget it. Can you meet me at the cafe at seven?”
The silence is so loud that Andrew checks to see if Neil really did hang up on him this time. He’s relieved to see he hasn’t. Yet, at least. Andrew doesn’t press for an answer. He gives Neil time to think about it, hoping his reply will be a positive one. A few seconds later comes Neil’s answer, and he doesn’t disappoint. “Yes, okay, yeah.”
“Eloquent.” And the small chuckle he hears is worth it. “See you there.” And before Neil can say anything in return, Andrew hangs up, tosses the phone on the couch, and sits down for a couple of minutes waiting for his racing heart to calm down.
This is ridiculous, he thinks.
I’m fucked, he thinks.
Unlike the other day, Neil is now wearing actual clothes. He’s put on a pair of jean shorts–which Andrew finds disgusting– and a gray t-shirt. Andrew can’t decide if this or the running outfit is worse. If today goes well, he’ll need to go shopping with the idiot. Teach him how to dress himself properly, and eat some ice cream on the way as a bonus.
Ignoring his hideous clothing choice, Neil looks good. Like, really good. Andrew stops for a minute, just to stare at him, before composing himself and walking over to him. The moment Neil sees him, a hesitant, small smile forms in his lips. Andrew doesn’t return the smile but his lips quirk upwards a bit. He pretends not to notice.
After they place their orders–same as yesterday–they make their way to the same table as last time. Neil is looking at him, like he’s some kind of enigma he’s trying to solve but keeps failing at doing so. There’s a question in his gaze, a curiosity burning under his icy eyes.
“Has anyone told you not to jump to conclusions on your own?” Andrew asks and watches Neil’s eyes widen a little.
“What conclusion? You were perfectly clear. I know how to take a ‘no’” Neil says and Andrew freezes.
I know how to take a ‘no’
That, that right there, pulls a chord in Andrew’s heart and for a second he stops breathing all together. It’s the way so many people in Andrew’s life didn’t know how to take a ‘no’. Never cared enough to respect his ‘no’. When Andrew needed his ‘no’ to be heard it hadn’t. Andrew could have been screaming but no one ever had heard a thing. And now, here was Neil accepting a ‘no’ that wasn’t there in the first place. Andrew feels a buzzing in his ears, and he just keeps staring at Neil like he’s seen a ghost. He can see Neil’s mouth moving but he can’t make out the words.
“Andrew!” Neil raises his voice, almost yelling, making some people turn to look at them, annoyance in their glares. Andrew finally snaps out of it.
Neil is looking at him, with an odd look in his face and Andrew doesn't know how to explain what just happened. Not without giving too much of himself when he’s not yet ready.
“You okay?”
“Fine.” Andrew says, but he’s not sure if it’s the truth or not. Neil, thankfully, doesn’t push. Only waits for Andrew to go on.
“You ran away yesterday.” Andrew notices Neil flinching like he’s been hit but chooses not to comment on it. Not not. He’ll ask later. If he’s given the chance.
“I didn’t run away.” Neil defends himself, and his tone is careful and too serious.
Andrew doesn’t argue. “You never let me explain, though.”
This time, Neil doesn’t have anything else to say. He just keeps staring at Andrew, trying to take him apart with only his eyes. Piece by piece. Brick by brick.
“The first thing you told me was that you weren’t interested and that you wanted to get this over with.” Andrew tries to explain his point of view. “I wanted to respect that. I didn’t think you’d changed your mind.”
Andrew watches Neil realizing what he’s trying to say. His eyes flash with surprise, then understandment and his mouth falls open. “Oh.” He says again and this time it’s definitely a good kind of ‘oh’.
“Idiot.” But there’s no real anger hidden in Andrew’s voice.
Neil’s smile is back, as blinding as ever, and his eyes glisten, and his cheeks flush, and Andrew just wants to pull him in and kiss him breathless. “Does that mean you like me?” Neil asks, smug.
“I take it back. Leave.”
“You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” Neil laughs. “Besides, you like me too much to send me away.”
“I hate you.” Andrew really doesn’t.
“Yeah, sure, Andrew. Whatever you say.” And the grin stays stuck on his face for the rest of their date.
It’s the way Neil moves his chair so he’s closer to Andrew. It’s the way their knees touch, and their fingers are intertwined. It’s the way they keep asking the weirdest questions, going back and forth. It’s the way Neil smiles, and laughs. It’s the way he’s so easy to talk to. It’s everything and it’s perfect and Andrew is planning to hold on to it. Hold on to Neil.
When Neil kisses him on the cheek goodbye, it’s probably the first–and he swears the last when Neil makes fun of him–time he’s ever blushed in his life. It feels good. He feels so wonderstruck that he forgets to actually kiss Neil. It's embarrassing.
Neil stays and Andrew throws away the list of date questions he kept in his drawer. He doesn’t think he’ll need them again.