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She came down the stairs, holding back her sigh when she saw him. Andi told her it was Dave so there was no need to act exasperated. She almost told Andi to tell him to go to hell but that wouldn’t have been fair either. Couples fought. They had misunderstandings, arguments, and sometimes even knockdown drag outs. That wasn’t really Dave and Erin’s thing. Still, they were only human and while this couldn’t truly be described as a fight it wasn’t their first standoff.
“I'm really tired David, and I have class in the morning.” she walked over to the front door where he was standing. “I don’t want to fight with you.”
“I didn’t come here to fight.”
“Then why are you here? I thought you said you needed space.”
“Come outside and talk with me.”
“It’s freezing outside.”
“Its not.” Dave shook his head and held out his hand. “Come outside and talk with me, baby.”
There were three things that Erin could rarely resist. One was holding Dave’s hand. Another was him saying I love you; that still slayed her. The other was him calling her baby. She often wondered if he ever called any of the other girls who passed through his life that term of endearment. Erin hoped she wasn’t naïve for thinking the answer was no.
It was special. She could tell just from his tone of voice when he said it. Never in her life had any man had such lustful affection laced in his voice when saying anything to her. Though Dave could probably muster lustful affection for the weather report that name meant something to him and to her. Hiding it was useless.
This time she did sigh as Erin took the hand extended to her. She couldn’t believe she was about to go outside dressed as she was. Ratty gray sweatpants, a pink Tri Sig sweatshirt, and fuzzy pink slipper socks wasn’t her usual ensemble. But after she and Dave had their moment, all Erin wanted to do was curl up and just forget about everything. How was that possible when she had to jump right back into classes in the morning with finals on her heels? Perhaps this was what her father meant when he called David a distraction.
“I shouldn’t have walked away from you.” Dave said when they were out on the porch alone.
He hated her sorority house. That wasn’t fair because she always supported his fraternity things, especially since Max Ryan was gone. But it wasn’t the structure itself. It wasn’t Erin’s room where they could be alone; where they first made love.
It was mostly her sisters. Some of them were from his past and didn’t like to let him forget it. He feared they didn’t let Erin forget it either. It was just a hostile place for him. But if it was where she was then he was going to be there too.
“You have every right to your space.” She replied. “I think it was better than us standing there hollering at each other. That’s counterproductive and surely one or both of us would've said something we regret. It’s not easy to come back from that kind of thing.”
“I never want to say something I regret to you.”
“That’s good to know.”
“I also don’t want to hold you back.” Dave said. “I'm not with you so you can turn into someone you don’t even recognize anymore. I want you to be the best Erin Strauss you can be.”
“I want you to be the best David Rossi.”
“The idea of you leaving, going a million miles away…”
“It’s not a million miles away.” She said.
“Erin, you're going to Cairo. If you wanted to get further away from me the only other choice might be Queensland.”
“They didn’t have the program I wanted.”
Dave smirked. She was making jokes. He didn’t want her making jokes but he loved her for making jokes. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. At first she seemed a bit resistant but it only took a moment for her to hold him back.
“I'm just going to kiss you right now. I'm going to kiss you breathless, Erin Strauss, and then we can talk again. Is that alright with you?”
How could she possibly say no to that? Didn’t he know she was breathless every single time he kissed her? When his arms were around her, his lips on hers, his tongue in her mouth…how did he even learn to kiss like that? Erin surrendered and let him take her.
It made her tingle all over. When it was over, too quickly for her liking, she just held on. How in the hell was she going to make it for what could be nine months without his touch? This was so much more than a damn distraction. Erin Strauss hadn't been this distracted in her life.
“I love you.” Dave whispered, still holding her close. “I'm gonna love you whether you're down the street or a million miles away. I don’t want you to go cuz dammit I'm not sure I can live without you. That probably sounds fake or even worse desperate, but I guess this is the big test.
“This is the moment where El Jefe has to grow up. I'm not letting you go, Erin; in the metaphorical sense. Cairo or anywhere life might take you…I'm asking you to leave your heart here. You can take mine with you since you'll probably need one for basic life functions and such.”
“Say that again.” she replied, kissing him.
“Are you kidding? That was a lot of words.”
“Just the heart part, David.” Erin laughed some.
“Leave your heart here with me and you can take mine.”
“How do you…?”
“It’s a gift.” He smiled.
“You really love me?” she caressed his face. He’d grown a goatee over the summer. Erin still wasn’t sure how she felt about it. She liked how it felt on her skin, on her fingertips; she knew that for sure.
“Yes. I've never once lied to you, even when it would've been to my benefit. I love you. Do you love me?”
“I love you.” she nodded. “I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want you to fall in love with someone else. No, that’s not it. I don’t think that would happen. But you're a man and you have needs.”
“I only need you. My God woman, what in the hell have you done to me?”
“I didn’t do anything.”
“Oh you did something.” Dave kissed her. He held her close and exhaled. “Just promise me you won't go over there and meet some guy like Winsor Hamilton and forget all about a Long Island Joe like me.”
“You're the best Long Island Joe I know.” Erin replied.
“I'm the only Long Island Joe you know.”
“There's that too. A part of me wishes I didn’t have to go. I know that’s for selfish reasons. This fellowship is so good for me.
“There were hundreds of applicants, maybe even thousands and I was one of ten chosen. In my field this is huge. This is an accomplishment that will set me up for good things as my education continues. But dammit I'm going to miss you so much.”
“We’ve got a month and some change to remember everything about each other. We won't forget a single piece of skin.”
“I’ll miss more than sex, David.” She said. But holy moly she was going to miss sex. Sex was awesome. It wasn’t as if Erin had anything at all to compare it to but she still knew that being with anyone else would never be the same as being with David.
“I’ll make sure that you don’t take anything to Egypt but good memories, baby. I promise you that.”
Erin nodded and held him tight. She didn’t want to let him go. It was probably a bad idea…she needed to be fresh and ready for classes tomorrow. But Erin was doing great in all of her classes. Being a little tired on her first morning back would be OK. Even if it wasn’t, it was going to have to be.
“Can I stay with you tonight?” she asked.
“Is that a rhetorical question?” Dave countered.
“I don’t want to be a bother. You have classes in the morning.”
“My first class isn’t until 11. You know I need my beauty sleep.”
“That’s a shame since I wasn’t planning on giving you much.”
“I can be ugly tomorrow…it’s all good.”
“I’ll get some stuff.” Erin replied laughing.
“I’ll wait right out here.”
Nodding, Erin pulled herself out of his arms. That was no easy feat since the first time she was in them. Soon they were just holding hands; it seemed as if Dave didn’t want to let her go. He finally kissed her hand and released her.
“I’ll be right back.”
Dave smiled as she went into the house. Being apart from January to June would be nothing short of agony. He wasn’t worried about all the girls and insanity; that was always there. He just didn’t want to miss her. Dave didn’t want to miss her while knowing it was improbable not to.
He knew it was love. It was real, painful, crazy ass love. For the first time in his life he actually worried that he might not be good enough for a girl. The thought only crossed his mind once in a while but it did cross his mind. In Cairo Erin was going to meet all these rich guys in her program.
They would be suave with money to burn and could talk her ear off all night about the Russian Revolution, the Camp David Accords, and all those other things he just started reading up on. Erin would be impressed. But would she be enamored? She could have any man she wanted and even though she didn’t act like it, she had to know it. He had to make sure he was worth coming back to. They were worth coming back to.
“I'm ready.” She came out with her overnight duffle.
At least she didn’t bring her schoolbag. Why even delude themselves? They were going back to his place for some lovin, touchin, squeezin and she honestly couldn’t wait. It wasn’t just about the sex. But the sex was mind blowing.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
Erin smiled, reaching for his hand and lacing her fingers through his. “I'm positive.”
***