Work Text:
Of course, it was raining. Yuta could hear the pitter patter of the rain when it started. He could already smell the way the flowers all around him sprung to life at the potentiality of water on their roots–leaves–petals. Other days, perhaps this would have been inviting to the florist. A chance to stick some plants out into the pavement just outside the store instead of his monotonous watering routine. And, really, he should be happy about this but he wasn’t– not really.
On rainy days like this, the normal citizen would decide: rain? Thunder? A possibility of flooded streets? I’ll be staying my ass inside. And Yuta couldn’t blame them, especially on a Friday pre-evening. Too late to go out for some lunch and too early to consider dinner. It’s supposed to be the perfect time for a florist, right before all the dates are happening. All the people looking to impress dates with some pre-made bouquets– some would go with the first one they would see. But if it’s raining, there’s no reason to do that. It’s raining. Who goes out on a date when it’s raining? If Yuta had a partner and he said let’s celebrate despite the rain– frankly, Yuta would have to let them go without him.
It’s truly a sad day for florists, although he supposes it is nice that the flowers look a little less dead. He tries to look at the positive as he’s hauling out some of the heavier pots to the back where the most sensitive of plants have to stay so they don’t shrivel up just at the thought of too much water. Plants are curious like that. He’s setting up a light for some orchids when he hears the front door bells ring and just like that– Yuta’s proven wrong on his theory of no-rainy-day-dates.
He makes his way back to the front to see a really fucking wet young man. His bangs are starting to curl from just how wet he is and Yuta, at first, just stares because – what the fuck? But he’s a one-man-show out here so he forces a smile when he says, “Hello! How can I help you?”
The young man breaks from whatever thought process train he’s riding and looks up at Yuta. He freezes and Yuta expects this, but then freezes for too long. Yuta forces another smile and then the young man laughs– laughs, chuckles? Nervously fights the laughing. “Hey,” He starts fidgeting with his wet sleeves, “Err– Can I get some help with picking out– err–”
“Sure, I sell bouquets, singles, some potted friends,” Yuta says rather quickly and interrupts the mess of words coming from the young man, then glances at the workstation he has to his left, “I also do assorted flower bouquets, but that’s a little extra.”
“Oh, you do!” He says, a brighter face than before, “I was worried you didn’t. Yeah, I’ll take one of those– just any flower will do, I think.”
Yuta squints for a second, then smiles, “Sure. Is there a specific occasion? Or perhaps a color scheme you wanted to go with?”
“Oh, it’s for a date. I dunno, I like blue? Are there any?”
Yuta quickly nods, “What about some blue and white?” He makes his way around and pulls the counter door so he can go look through the flowers he had up for display. The young man follows, although not directed to and looks over as Yuta ponders for a little. He picks out a handful of periwinkle, lily of the valley, and bluebell flowers. He shows them to the curious man and he watches as Yuta carefully thumbs through some of the stems and then smiles brightly to say, “I think you’ll like these, they’re lovely and we can really make the blue pop, what do you think?”
The young man easily nods and hums in agreement and Yuta’s grateful that some men are so easily swayed. The way the man follows him around the store however is a little annoying as he’s grabbing all his necessary tools, so he’s glad that once he’s back behind the counter something separates the man from constantly looking.
“I’m really glad you’re open,” The man sighs and Yuta smiles politely as he starts cutting some l leaves, “I feel like I’ve been to five different spots, all closed.”
“Well, you’re really lucky. I was just about to close up shop.”
The man smiles, a bit awkwardly. It’s cute, although really clumsy and Yuta can’t begin to imagine how this mess of a man has a relationship going when he can’t remember to buy his bouquet of flowers on time.
“Where’d you get your tattoos?” He asks suddenly and Yuta has to stop cutting to lift up his arm, where said tattoos are colorfully looking back up at him.
“Mm, I have a friend who does tattoos.” He shrugs, going back to arranging the blues and the whites–making sure they’re not too tight together or too loose. He looks back up at the young man to give him a once-over, “Why, are you looking for an artist?”
“Oh, no–” The man makes a little embarrassed noise, “They just look cool. A florist with flower tattoos.”
Yuta scrunches his nose in response, carefully wrapping his creation up with his fancy paper wrap and store sticker, just in case this clumsy, tattoo-admiring guy finds himself in need again. He hopes, at least, that he tells his friends. All the other last-minute shoppers.
By the time he’s finished with the bouquet the young man has already returned to his stuttering and easily gives up his credit card, almost as easy as he is to say thank you and leave a big tip– you know, ‘cause you stayed open and stuff. Yuta laughs in a way that is only half-flirty: a quarter because he left a tip and a quarter because he knows the man has to run back to his car to pick up his date. He makes sure to give the man a plastic covering that will save the flowers from utter destruction if he only walks them to his car. He bids the young man goodbye with a “Tell your friends” and the guy nods, makes a big deal about using his jacket to cover up the parts the plastic can’t cover, and that’s all Yuta remembers from the strange young man.
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
In hindsight, Yuta didn’t expect to actually see this guy again. Nor did he expect to see him just, literally, a week later. And he sure as fuck didn’t expect to see him coming in with this lopsided but happy smile the second he walked through that door.
“Hey!” He says all proud and genuinely glad to be seeing Yuta again. And oh god, what now? This can go one of two ways, at least off the top of Yuta’s head. The guy can either come in, pretend to be friendly and charming but ultimately be looking for some discount or even try to say that the bouquet was bad and was looking for a refund. OR–and this was the bad option– that half flirty laugh Yuta gave the week prior might have been played up too well and– “My date really liked the flowers last week!”
“Oh, err– good! I’m glad,” Yuta quits clipping some of the roses he was preparing for a phone order. He tilts his head slightly, though.
“Yeah, I was actually hoping you’d make another one!”
Oh. Third option.
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
Mark Lee is a clown. Woah, woah, woahhhh! Okay, Yuta can’t say that about his loyal customer, the only airhead that shows up so often, Yuta starts to worry when he doesn’t show up at least biweekly. He appreciates the income and particularly, unbeknownst to anyone that has ever known him– actually enjoys the gossip and updates on whether or not Mark Lee has found his person yet.
Mark is at the fresh age of 23, which naturally means that he’s started to worry about his lack of relationships. He’s gotten convinced by his close friends that he needs to get out there and finally experience the dating world. For real this time! (Whatever that means!) He’s gone on more dates this year than the average person and Yuta has to commend his persistence at the very least, which also includes his undying optimism. The dating app Mark has downloaded into his phone has helped provide the matches, Yuta’s flower shop has provided the first-date gift, but somewhere between the moment Mark leaves Yuta’s flower shop and the next time Yuta sees him– something always seems to go wrong.
At first Yuta thought it was a joke, or perhaps just a really long rouse into convincing Yuta that Mark isn’t a total creep– but after the 5th time, Yuta asked to see chat logs and he can confirm: something’s going awfully wrong with this kid’s dates. Yuta has lost track of how many times he’s seen Mark around, but it’s gotten to the point where he’s seen Mark more than his close friends and as much as he appreciates Mark’s money, this can’t be going well for Mark’s ego.
“You lost me again,” Yuta supplies after a while of Mark’s rambling, trying to put together the pieces of how exactly Mark’s been messing these dates up. Yuta had offered to help, but sometimes it’s just better to mind your own business.
“I know, sorry– let me start over.”
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
Mark isn’t an unattractive person. At least, Yuta doesn’t think so. He’s rather really cute. If you like the whole boy-next-door thing. Every time he comes in, Yuta tries to think about all the ways that he would have denied Mark Lee a second date, just to try to figure out what exactly Mark is doing wrong since he offered to help after all.
Mark comes in consistently with his circle frames, so Yuta offers that perhaps it’s because he’s blind as a bat. Yuta only knows this because he asks if Mark should go with his contacts instead. Mark doesn’t think this is a totally bad idea, but also takes his circle frames and places them on Yuta and as soon as they reach Yuta’s eyes– everything blurs and Mark’s gone completely and Yuta’s head starts to hurt.
“Holy fuck, you can’t see,” Yuta says this time and as he takes them off he can clearly see an amused Mark. It’s a little disorientating right after but Mark’s laughter fills the shop and Mark really isn’t an unattractive guy. His laughter isn’t obnoxious, it’s really contagious and gets Yuta to smile back. And as Mark battles his fit of laughter and slips his glasses back on, eyes still scrunched and repeating Yuta’s words, Yuta finds him really fucking endearing so it can’t be that. It can’t be his glasses.
Still, Yuta tries to say that perhaps it’s not his glasses but his outfits. Mark isn’t a bad dresser, not for a long shot but maybe he should dress for the occasion! Maybe on picnic dates, he should stick to his goody two-shoes outfits and on dates that are more formal he should try something more daring. Maybe slick back his hair, wear something that fits his figure. Yuta even asks Mark to send him pictures of his outfits. And it’s a good idea, at first. Yuta becomes Mark’s personal stylist for a few weeks, sees Mark’s clothes draped on his bed and then gets to see what it looks like in person. Yuta, right after building beautiful bouquets of flowers, then fixes Mark’s collar behind the counter and helps roll up sleeves or the hem of his jeans. Sometimes Yuta brings in a jacket he has at home and drapes it over Mark, even sits him down on a stool he has in the back and starts helping him style his hair better. Sometimes even brings his blow dryer, plugs it in and runs his fingers through Mark’s hair or with a comb and Mark always scrunches his nose when the hot air reaches the front of his face. Yuta watches all his hard work leave the front door, with a cheeky smile and one last wink for the road. So Yuta thinks, it can’t possibly be that.
It can’t be Mark’s outward appearance, because Yuta knows that with that alone Yuta would have already jumped his bones. But Mark starts coming in the following day after dates, no request for flowers and just a small defeated smile on his face so Yuta has to get back to the drawing board.
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
It’s really hard to see your loyal customer turned makeover client come in dissatisfied or even sad. Mark doesn’t try to show that he is sad, but Yuta’s heart breaks a little when he sees him come in again without good news. He comes in with the borrowed clothes Yuta has given him, already washed and neatly folded, and goes: “Maybe next time.”
So, Yuta starts working a little harder. He starts asking Mark what kind of things he talks about during dates, because maybe that’s it. Maybe some people are thrown off by Mark’s rambles, because it certainly was something to get used to when Yuta first met him. Yuta has heard him talking about all sorts of things, mostly movies, shows, books he’s managed to pick up, and music.
Yuta writes down things that Mark says that are charming so he can help give Mark talking points for dates rather than times he’s really awkward and can’t say anything. Yuta tells Mark that he likes when Mark talks about things he likes so he should find things he has in common with his dates. For example, Yuta and Mark really get along when they talk about music– even with all their opposing views. Yuta likes rock bands and Mark only likes the few pop-rock songs Yuta has recommended. Yuta listened to that one Frank Ocean song Mark recommended and liked it, so it’s about finding that balance. If Mark can find things to talk about with Yuta, he’s sure that he can do that with his first dates.
But no matter how many talking points Yuta gives him, Mark still comes back with reports on his dates that go very south. Mark seems to have trouble with relaying everything they’ve practiced, because while Yuta is receptive and already knows a lot about Mark– his first dates don’t. Mark tries to find commonalities, but ends up feeling like they’re in an excruciating interview and by the end of the date, both parties are worn out.
So, Yuta asks Mark to spend more time on his dating app texting before setting up dates but to be very fair, Yuta sees the issue when Mark keeps getting down-to-fuck idiots who don’t care about Mark’s cute habits: The way his eyes light up when someone is interested in what he has to say, the scrunching of his nose when he finds someone endearing, the way his voice shoots up an octave when he’s too excited, the messing with his hair when he’s nervous, or just the way all the aunties that gravitate towards him when he comes into the shop and they’re there for their weekly flower shopping. The way they pinch his cheeks and immediately trust him or the way he opens the door for them and helps carry their bags around the shop. The way people find his presence cheerful and calming and maybe having him around the shop isn’t a bad idea but will someone please just kiss this boy already.
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
Mark’s the one that brings this up. In retrospect, Yuta should have known this was a bad idea but Yuta isn’t known for making the right decisions.
“I feel like you know me better than anyone,” He says one evening after he comes into the shop and mopes around for a bit post-date. Yuta lets him wander for a bit, as per usual, and knows he’ll eventually make his way behind the counter to sit on the extra stool Yuta has and then Mark will just reflect. Yuta starts to wonder if he should just hire Mark, he’s already there part-time anyways.
Yuta doesn’t respond to Mark’s comment, though, because he’s used to Mark’s out-loud thinking by now. He doesn’t disagree with the statement, although he knows Mark has a few other friends who’ve probably known him longer and therefore better. But he doesn’t counter the statement, more-so because Yuta feels good when Mark says it.
“Maybe that’s the problem,” Mark swings around in the stool, pulling the lever to bring him slightly down as Yuta works on repotting some plants he has out front. There’s just one sole customer wandering around and Yuta’s grateful Mark doesn’t speak too loudly. He’s pressing some fresh dirt in when he remembers Mark was talking and he looks up to see Mark staring. Mark smiles sheepishly and then says something that sounds really… stupid. “What if we go on a practice date?”
“What?” Yuta says almost immediately.
“Yeah, dude, maybe if we do one of those, like, faux dates we can figure out what I’m doing wrong, y’know?” Mark says this so easily that Yuta feels a little light-headed, but Yuta doesn’t know how to say no, this is a really bad idea. It’s on the tip of his tongue and he’s about to find a good excuse for it, but Mark’s eyes are big behind his glasses and he seems to be genuinely asking.
“Sure.”
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
“Have you considered, what’s the word for this,” Yuta feigns thought as he balances his phone on his shoulder with his cheek. He’s pulling up some worn out jeans and buttoning up the shirt he’s pre-picked for this stupid fake date, “Giving up?”
“Dude, that’s quitter talk,” Mark jokes through the phone and Yuta frowns.
“Listen, sometimes things are just supposed to fall into place, you know? I don’t think you should force it too much,” Yuta sighs, taking a good look at himself in the mirror. He knows he’s talking to Mark, the guy who comes into his small flower shop just around the corner from his apartment. This is the guy he’s been friends with for a really long time now, the guy he ‘knows better than anyone.’ But there’s something really nerve-wracking that starts to bubble at the pit of his stomach and Yuta can tell these are all warning signs. It’s his body physically rejecting a date with Mark Lee– with anyone to be exact.
“Well, sure, but I’ve already done that.” Mark answers simply. Yuta hears some rustling over the phone and he knows Mark is probably changing himself, putting on the planned outfit. The one they both picked out before their practice date. And Yuta already knows what it is. Jeans. A simple dress shirt. They’re headed to an art museum because for the purposes of this date, the one chosen factor between them is art. A nice artsy date, Mark had said, and it really made Yuta nervous.
“I know, Mark, but you’re so young. I don’t think you should worry about this kind of stuff.”
“You know, this really sounds like you’re trying to get out of this.”
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
Mark lies. When Yuta gets the text message that Mark’s downstairs, Yuta grabs his wallet, keys, and whatever’s left of his dignity and heads down to meet him. What he’s met with is not part of the plan, but Yuta can’t say he hates the newfound spontaneity that Mark, as far as he knows, isn’t used to.
Firstly, it’s the fact that Mark has deviated from their plans. He’s not wearing the outfit that Yuta, the stylist, has picked out for him and so he clicks his tongue as soon as he sees Mark but again– he can’t hate it. When Yuta asks, Mark reminds Yuta that this is a date. It’s supposed to feel, right? He can’t know what Mark wears before they go on their date, he can’t know anything.
“You literally copied my outfit, what do you mean?” Yuta gives him a once-over and Mark laughs. It’s silly and mischievous. The way he asked over the phone what Yuta would wear, only to show up with something strangely similar. Their black-and-white striped shirts, although different fabric–different–style– would give them away to any passerby that they were together. It’s cheesy and awful and Yuta doesn’t hate it.
“Of course,” Mark sing-songs, fixing the black beanie on his head, “You’re my date.”
“Okay,” Yuta sighs, attempting to sound exhausted–annoyed–anything other than giving Mark a hint that he’s enjoying this at all. On the one hand, he shouldn’t be enjoying this because this is a practice-run. This is just training for Mark so he can be better at his own dates and find somebody else other than Yuta. The point is that Yuta should eventually enjoy this, but not enjoy it too much because ultimately, this isn’t for him. But on the other hand, Yuta hasn’t gone on a date in a really long time. It’s difficult, though, because Yuta’s been anti-dating. The complete opposite of whatever Mark is doing now. He’s been against the potentiality of getting his heart broken or breaking someone else’s heart. Yuta doesn’t like the idea of dating because it’s so fleeting, it’s fake, just as this date is with Mark. They’ll smile for a bit, enjoy each other’s presence, but at the end of the day– what about their morals? What about their future plans? What about Yuta’s family? And his family? What about everything that comes after the honeymoon phase? The fighting. The disagreements, something that similar musical tastes can only patch up so much.
But he plays along, at least for Mark. He walks alongside him to the art museum. They talk quietly within the walls placed up between exhibitions. They share thoughts on pieces and take a few shots of some of the sculptures. Mark takes some of Yuta looking up at some installations and Yuta does the same. And it’s easy, freeing almost to pretend for a little bit that everything’s good, everything’s fine. That this fleeting feeling of joy can possibly blossom into something more.
And that’s the thing, the problem with Mark, isn’t it? It’s that Mark feels so safe. He feels too good to be true. He’s so warm and kind. He holds the door open for Yuta, helps him stab his boba straw into his cup. He talks about small things like the TV show they’re both watching right now and buys a variety of street food on their walk so by the time they’ve reached the park they can just lie on the ground, easily eat some food– pretend that everything’s all right. Yuta could freeze time right now, live right in this moment and be happy.
“So,” Mark says through a mouthful of dumpling and steam escaping his mouth, “On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate my services?”
Yuta snorts and confers with his memory before deciding, “Eight and a half.”
“What?” Mark laughs, “Wait, eight?”
“Yeah, nerd, you copied my outfit.”
All things considered, however, the nerves that were rising up in his skin before the date had now been subdued. Yuta finds this to be Mark’s special talent. And he did have fun, even if it was just a practice date. He says this and Mark looks proud at that. But there is still, the uncomfortable walk back to Yuta’s apartment before the sun goes down that has them continuously wondering what exactly is the problem with Mark’s other dates. He knows Mark must be thinking the same thing as they walk back, but he doesn’t have the heart to ask.
“I’m gonna be honest with you, Mark Lee,” Yuta says once they’ve reached his building, “I don’t think this world deserves you.”
Mark finally smiles a little and the weight on his shoulders physically lifts, “Thanks.”
Yuta pinches one of Mark’s cheeks and then gently kisses the other, “I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Yeah,” Mark laughs uncharacteristically, “Yeah.”
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
“So lemme get this straight.”
Yuta is the real clown. It’s not every day that he gets to be on the receiving end of Johnny’s lectures because frankly, Johnny doesn’t lecture anybody. But Yuta finds that his situation has gotten so bad, Johnny Suh’s morality compass has risen from its grave. Johnny had been working on some cars before Yuta had showed up with his problems, but was now sitting in his office with Yuta in his swivel chair and a bag of chips.
“This guy,” Johnny thinks, “Mark, right? This guy, Mark. He’s single. And you’re single. And you guys went on a date, a good date. And you have feelings for him–”
“I never said that,” Yuta supplies from where he was sitting and sighs as Johnny plops himself down on the sofa chair in his office. He was still covered in grease and the smell of gasoline still reeked through the walls, but Johnny was the only person Yuta had thought to go to. He never thought he’d be needing advice from the guy he had met when his car’s battery died.
“You didn’t have to! The kid’s been creating spotify playlists for you, you’re so fucked,” Johnny shakes his head.
“It was one playlist and it’s not like that, he’s just… stupid.”
“Oh, he sure is if he hasn’t realized that you’re falling in love with him.”
“I’m not falling in love with him, he’s just…” Yuta trails off, thinks about how he had kissed Mark’s cheek and Yuta really is the real clown. To think that helping a guy find love and not doing so for himself, while simultaneously doing just that is clown behavior. To think that kissing Mark’s cheek and have it mean nothing was the exact wrong thing to do, so he groans at Johnny, “You’re no help.”
“Then you should have gone to see Ten then! Get out of my office!”
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
Mark stops showing up to the shop.
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
The day would eventually come when little Mark Lee ended up finding someone. That was, after all, Yuta’s end goal, wasn’t it? He had been helping Mark in all of his endeavors just so that one day he would no longer need Yuta and his flowers and all the dating advice he could give. It was good. Mark had texted him, told him it had gone great on his first date and now they had set up a second. And it was fine, because Yuta kept getting updates via text messages and Mark was still the same, only now Yuta saw less of him.
And this is great! Mark is finding someone! He’s getting out there, he’s laughing with someone else. He’s finally being appreciated by someone else. That someone else likes to hear Mark play guitar and he actually knows all of Mark’s favorite r&b artists. This someone else actually pays for Mark’s dinner and brings equally cheesy gifts as Mark had when he came in with a bouquet arranged by Yuta. And this someone else is kind, doesn’t think that matching outfits are stupid. He likes to dance and he’s also into the arts. He’s nice to strangers and he tips waiters nicely! This someone else holds Mark’s hand on the first date and Mark had found it nice! Very nice! And Yuta’s sure they kiss now, they do all the things that dates are supposed to be like. And that’s so good, that’s so very good for Mark. Mark deserves it.
But the shop is empty now. Even with all his new customers and the growing popularity of Yuta’s little shop, it still feels very empty. He gets asked about Mark from the aunties that used to pinch Mark’s cheeks and bless him and Yuta has to tell them that he’s really busy, which isn’t a complete lie. And sometimes Yuta does miss having to arrange a new bouquet, different color each date. He misses the exhaustion of working hard to get Mark to look good once Yuta had closed shop and dedicated his attention to gelling up Mark’s hair. Or seeing Mark so often that he was just a constant in Yuta’s life, another monotonous routine. But Mark’s happy now and Yuta’s resentful.
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
It takes that someone else 8 dates, 1 flower arrangement, 20 movies, and 3 shared playlists later before he asks Mark to make it official.
At first Yuta thinks it’s ludacris that someone would take that long just to ask someone out. But knowing Mark, Mark must have appreciated the time and effort. Mark doesn’t text Yuta when this someone else finally asks him, but instead shows up at his apartment. Yuta had just finished eating his dinner when he heard the knocking. Yuta had imagined that it had to have been one of his neighbors, possibly even the landlord but was very surprised when he found Mark there.
“Hey.”
Yuta furrowed his brows and let Mark in, although a bit cautiously. He almost didn’t even recognize Mark because it had been so long since the last time he had seen him. The familiarity he had once had with seeing Mark’s face had now gone and left, “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing– I was in the area.” Mark stands awkwardly at the edge of Yuta’s couch once inside, an internal debate clearly going on inside Mark’s head. Yuta frowns.
“I don’t want to be that guy, but I’ll count to three and if you don’t tell me what’s wrong by three I’ll–”
“He asked me to be his boyfriend.”
The truth is, Yuta dreaded this part the most. It was supposed to be inevitable. Mark was supposed to be successful after all this help, because it was clear that Mark was more than worthy of the love he was searching for. He was clearly boyfriend material, what with all the flowers he spent money on for dates. He was considerate, caring. Yuta knew that eventually one of those dates would make Mark someone else’s boyfriend. But this was hard to face now.
If it hadn’t been for all that time he spent with Mark, perhaps he wouldn’t have developed this god awful crush that Johnny kept talking about whenever they were together. Or perhaps even all the times Yuta would bring up Mark. Maybe he wouldn’t be feeling this empty feeling every single time he went in to work at the shop. He wouldn’t clearly miss Mark whenever someone called in an order for an arrangement. And maybe he wouldn’t feel like he’s missing Mark at that very moment, when Mark stands in front of him and tell him he’s found someone else.
“That’s good, Mark.” Yuta says, a strain in his throat like the words are too hard to say and too hard to believe, “You have a boyfriend now, that’s exciting.”
Mark stares back for a moment and then says, “I haven’t told him yes yet. I told him I had to think about it.”
The small moment of joy Yuta has is greed. “Why?”
“Because I’m worried I like someone else.”
The truth is, Yuta dreaded this moment too. Yuta dreaded the thought of Mark actually liking him back. What if he was wrong for Mark? What if time had just been the factor for them? What if spending so much time together brought in this false sense of security or false sense of endearment. Of attraction. What would happen if they hadn’t spent so much time together, laughed between flowers, and shared secrets in art museums? Yuta thinks that Mark’s someone else would hate Yuta. He realizes now that if Mark chooses someone else, they also can’t stay friends. Can’t see each other anymore. Can’t text each other updates, share playlists, recommend movies for dates.
“He treats you well, right? I don’t think you should waste your time on someone who isn’t going to treat you right.” But this is more for himself, Yuta wonders if he would genuinely treat Mark right.
“This other guy treats me right, though.”
“Mark, just think about it more. Seriously.”
⊱ ────── {⋅. 💐 .⋅} ────── ⊰
Yuta decides that whatever Mark chooses, things will be fine. Eventually the aunties will stop asking about Mark, maybe Johnny will stop asking too. Time will move on, even after Mark Lee and everything will be okay. Yuta will even stop overthinking the one song in one of the playlists that Mark sent him months ago, the one that made no sense to the flow of the playlist. The song that was just randomly there and had Yuta thinking that perhaps it had been mistakenly added. The One That Got Away by Katy Perry. Weird song. Nothing to do with Mark. He will definitely stop pondering over lyrics. Because Mark couldn’t have thought that so early, right? He couldn’t have. He couldn’t have already felt this feeling of miss that early.
Yuta will stop associating Mark with all the pretty flowers he arranges into bouquets for customers. Daisies and Mark’s innocent humming noise whenever aunties told him to get married soon. Tulips and Mark’s smile when he took pictures of sunsets that’s still captured in Yuta’s phone. Asters and Mark’s small hands when he tried to help around the shop and made a mess in the back. Bluebells and Mark’s sleepy voice after being on the phone for hours. Camellias and the feeling it felt when Yuta realized he was losing Mark.
When he hears the bells of the front door of the shop open, he greets without looking up and continues to work on the arrangement at his workstation. He’s cutting some of the stems so they don’t poke out of the wrapping paper and calls out when no one greets him back, “Let me know if you need anything!”
And when still no one answers, he wipes his hands on his apron and turns to see who is silently walking in and Mark’s just there, standing. His smile is so small, but it’s there. And it’s so quiet when he says, “It didn’t work out."
“That’s okay,” Yuta says almost immediately, afraid that the Mark that has returned is a broken-hearted one. One with regrets.
“I know,” Mark says, this time with a wider smile. Yuta returns the smile and doesn’t mind the heat now growing in his cheeks. His hands are on the counter door that lets people in and out, tentatively waiting, “Can I?”
“When have you ever asked permission?” Yuta snorts and Mark takes that as a yes, so he opens the swinging door and allows himself into all of Yuta’s space. He watches as Mark musters the courage to come closer. Mark gently closes their gap by placing his hands on Yuta’s waist and leaning his body forward slightly.
“Can you kiss me? Properly? Not on the cheek?”
“Shouldn’t you ask me out first, Mark? Isn’t that proper dating etiquette?” And the small whine that Mark lets out is what does it for Yuta. It’s what pushes him over the edge after months of wanting and yearning and desire to kiss Mark. Properly. Not On the Cheek. So, he smiles and presses a kiss to Mark’s mouth, soft and slow, waiting excruciatingly long to let go. And when he does try to pull away, Mark only pushes forward, another whine. Yuta mumbles, “So annoying.”
Yuta thinks of honeysuckles, hydrangeas, jasmines. Soft skin. Pretty eyes. Messy hair. And the tight, tight hold Mark has around his heart.