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“-mid-morning show on 140.8. Broadcasting from the North Sea this is Raegan and Rosie opening up the Den-Den lines now. What do you think the government is not telling the truth about?” A very annoying theme song played to give the pair time to scan the calls.
“Change the channel, I can’t stand these guys,” Nami was sitting on deck of the Thousand Sunny, stitching up a spare shirt that got torn to more or less shreds during the last brawl. It probably should have been turned to scrap, but Nami liked it enough to make the extra effort to fix it back up.
“Nah, my turn with the radio, my rules,” Usopp was doing the same stuff, stitching some bigger pockets into the pockets of a pair or pants he had bought in the market.
“You can’t tell me you think these guys are good,”
“No they're super shitty, but they’re shitty in a funny way,” Usopp was a bit less of a gossip then Nami was but he was always much more eager to rip into a piece of media that fell short somewhere.
The stitching and bitching continued as the show ran through its first call and its first conspiracy theory. Some nonsense to do with Sengoku the Buddha's goat. Usopp and Nami first ripped into the fact that someone thought he kept a pet goat with him in important meetings. They went down this route until Robin, moving to the deck to get some better reading light, informed them that it was completely true. This then led to the question of how did the listener know that. Robin knew it because she did spy work with the Revolutionary Army when the crew was separated. How would some random listener know this?
“Thank you for bringing this frightening information to our attention dear listener,” Reagan had just finished a fifteen minute long tirade about how the goat definitely was the lynch pin in several other conspiracy theories that they already had.
“Now it’s time for the next call! What’s something to call you and what do you think the government is hiding from the people?” There was a soft click behind the sound of Rosie speaking, the sound of hanging up and answering a different phone.
“Remember that thing about Fire Fist Ace being Gold Rodger’s kid. I don’t think that’s true,” the caller stuttered through this simple sentence, as if they were genuinely scared to say this.
“Completely correct, in fact that isn’t the only parentage I think the government is lying about. Raegan, do you still have the list that we were making last night?”
“I do indeed Rosie. In our official findings and research we have found that Fire Fist Ace’s parents are…” Raegan pauses to let Rosie make a drum roll against the table, “ Portgas Rouge, as the records say and whoever the fuck Monkey D. Garp’s son is.”
“What the fuck?” Nami laughs, almost breathlessly. Usopp doesn’t say anything, just crouches in closer to the radio.
“Dear listeners, we have tried to find the identity of this man who clearly exists and is the missing link between a great hero of the marines and Emperor of the Seas Monkey D. Luffy.” Rosie pauses to let a tape roll of the duo calling Luffy becoming an emperor during the two years the Strawhats were separated.
“Listen, the dad’s probably just a farmer somewhere in the East Blue because there is nothing on this dude. The family is just as it seems and the government is lying to you when they try to say Ace and Luffy are not brothers. They are, it’s just that simple,” This is all said with the tone that anyone who disagrees is very, very stupid.
“And this isn’t the only parentage they’re lying about!”
“So called ‘Vinesmoke’ Sanji is not a Vinesmoke at all!” Raegan launches into a long rant of all the ‘evidence’ the pair has of this theory. It is almost frighteningly well researched, they know about Zeff and the exact day that Sanji ran away from his biological family. They misinterpret that as the child dying and Sanji, son of Zeff, just happening to be an identical stranger that the Vinesmoke family could use.
“To Sanji and or Zeff, if you are listening to this, give us a call! We’d love to get your truth out there!” Rosie finishes off the segment before an ad read begins. It’s something about a species of Den-Den Mushi that could allow you to misplace your signal through something called a Very Particular Nautilus (V.P.N.).
“Should…should we tell Sanji?” Nami had first hand accounts of how Sanji was with his biological family and knew that he’d be thrilled to find people who trusted him when he said that they were not his family, but she wasn’t sure how he would react to these believers being from the most well known conspiracy network in the world.
“Maybe? But later and , uh, carefully. Shh, it’s back,” While Usopp was a regular listener he had managed to miss most episodes where there was a conspiracy about the crew. Even most of the other episodes weren’t half as juicy as this.
“One of our call scanners said that you had some interesting information to share. Dear listener, tell me exactly what you told our scanner?” Rosie begins the next conspiracy segment off.
“I believe that Crocodile, the ex-warlord, was a member of the Revolutionary Army back in the day,” The caller starts off, fairly normally.
“And tell us what led you to this concussion,” Raegan knows, but she wants to hear it from the caller.
“Crocodile is fairly obviously a trans man,” the caller says with full confidence.
“That’s super invasive, right?” Nami hasn’t thought about Crocodile in years, the man basically gone from her mind after Alabasta. There was a brief acknowledgement of him for being part of the Marineford war, but that was about it.
“Yeah. I don’t think he’s the sort to be all that open about it, even if it was true,” Usopp gave a very meaningful look to Robin, trying to get an opinion from the one of them who had worked with Crocodile.
“What?” Robin actually hadn’t been paying attention to the radio show, more invested in reading her book and ignoring the world. She had been making good progress of it until this moment.
Usopp and Nami explained, starting with the current theory and then the rest of the show when Robin didn’t seem to understand it. She did confirm that they were being far too invasive about Crocodile’s identity. She also said that she has no personal knowledge of Crocodile being with the Revolutionary Army, but that it could be true unprompted. She finishes it off with a question.
“What is the number you call for this station?” Robin had been sitting on a deck chair right by the mast, right by where the ship Den-den was. She had already started waking up the snail to make her call.
Neither Usopp or Nami were able to answer her before the radio gave the number again. Robin quickly dialed it and was just as quickly put on hold. Despite the show’s reputation, or perhaps because of it, the lines were always busy. Both true believers and those with a joke flooded in whenever the lines were open. Eventually Robin’s call went through.
“Hello, you may call me Ms. All Sunday. I have some information about the Poneglyphs I’d like to share. Some direct translations if you would be interested in that,”
