Chapter Text
The Prologue
"Hannah!" Edward spoke up to me from where he stood beneath the tree I was in. "Esme said supper is ready. Come inside before you get lost in your thoughts."
I sat on my branch thirty feet up, my back pressed to the trunk of the tree as I read the most recent text from my father. I had asked him to email me some pictures of my new niece. He told me he would make sure to send them as soon as Rebecca got them to him. My sister just gave birth yesterday to a little girl. She named her Hannah after me. It was her second child. She had already had a son two years before, in May of 2010. Jacob was going to help take dad to Hawaii in a few weeks to meet his grandkids. Renesmee was going with him. She was thrilled to see Hawaii for the first time. Her parents weren't thrilled about her being away from home, but they trusted Jacob enough to watch her.
Seth spoke suddenly from below. "What the heck is she doing up there?"
Edward sighed. "Ignoring me, clearly. Lost in her thoughts. Your turn, Seth. She listens to you."
My husband scoffed. "Right. Sure she does."
Edward started to head back towards the house. "Tell her the food will get cold soon. And also, tell her that she needs to hunt tonight. Her eyes are getting dark."
"Every time I tell her to hunt, she ignores me and phases into a wolf," Seth muttered.
I put my phone away and shut my eyes. "You know it's not nice to talk about people," I muttered.
Edward was almost out of sight. He turned though, just in enough time to meet my gaze. He looked just as he had the first day I had met him on a cold May night six years ago. His copper hair and teenage body were frozen. I knew I would never change like him. We were both stuck in time. I would be sixteen for all eternity.
Edward responded to my previous statement. "And you know the rules. Last time you resisted your thirst, Emmett had to drag your passed out body home. Go hunting tonight before bed, Hannah. Don't make me get your brother to pull the Alpha card."
I rolled my eyes. "Okay, Edward. Chill. I'll go find some deer in the morning."
"No, Hannah. Tonight." It was an order.
I cringed. I couldn't argue with his tone. I knew if I tried he wouldn't just get Jacob but the whole family. I hated their interventions. They knew I didn't like killing things. And even though they still did the killing for me, I still didn't like it.
"Okay..." I said, looking away. "I'll go tonight with Alice."
He sighed. "It's so hard to have a snow-wolf as stubborn as you."
Seth muttered, "It's the human part that is where the stubborn comes from."
Edward laughed. He left then to return to the house. Seth looked up at me. I met his soft brown eyes, smiled, and looked away. Seth looked about eighteen physically, although he was really twenty in human age. He had stopped aging like me six years ago. He had cut his black hair yesterday though since it still grew out, getting some help from Alice who was horrified when he said he was going to just chop it on his own.
He looked up at me with hope. "Are you going to come down?"
I smirked. Seth hated my love for climbing and sitting in trees. He would never admit it out loud, but I read in his thoughts when we were both in wolf form that he was still scared of heights even after years of being invincible. Jacob had caught the thought and told him his fear was ridiculous, especially because if he fell he wouldn't get hurt.
"I'll be down soon," I promised. "Just go let Esme know she can put my food in the fridge and I'll heat it up later."
Being a werewolf and a partial human, I still had to eat. I burned up the food when I phased, but the nutrition was necessary along with my need for blood. My brother told me he felt like I was just an older Renesmee, especially when the two of us would hunt together sometimes and then go eat a sandwich a few hours later.
"At least you're not on the top branch today," Seth muttered. He managed to pull himself up the tree, using the limbs to jerk him up to where I was. Plopping onto the strong limb I was on, he said, "Can't you ever meditate on the ground for a change?"
I shrugged and smiled over at him. He gripped the limb to stay steady. "I like it up here. There's more air. And it gets the best cell reception."
He smirked. "True." He managed to scoot over towards me, his amazing brown eyes catching my darkened amber with question. I was certain if I didn't drink blood by tomorrow it would be black. "What's on your mind? Jasper sensed you were a little depressed today."
I sighed. "Jasper and Edward are always monitoring me." Then I stared back at my phone. "But yeah... I guess I'm a little jealous. Jacob and Renesmee get to go see Rebecca, while I'm stuck here."
He frowned. "You know it's because you're thought to be dead... we wouldn't be able to explain to your sister and her husband why you appeared all of the sudden."
I sighed again and shut my eyes. He could see the disappointment and scoot closer to cup my cheek. I met his gaze again. His touch was comfort.
"Hannah... you know if I could go back in the past and save you I would. I wish every day I was able to kill her before she bit you. I wish more than anything you could just be a shapeshifter like us."
I frowned. My heart thudded slowly in my chest. It reminded me that at least there was still a small bit of human in me. That and the fact that I craved dark chocolate on top of blood suddenly. I did not want to test that combination...
"I kind of miss just being human sometimes. I miss how it was before all of this happened six years ago. I mean, not the imprint part because I love you. But everything else."
He moved forward and pressed his lips to my forehead. He whispered against my skin, "I know you do. Every time I see the past play out in Jake's mind and your own, I just want to bash your brother's head more and more for what they did to you that year."
I let my cold hand push him away slightly, but only so I could crane my head up to kiss him on his cheek. He moved his head down to meet my lips. When we pulled away, I whispered, "It's not Jacob's fault I was such a mess. I understand he was trying to protect me. I blame our genes more than anything. This all happened because every single one of us was cursed to be a wolf."
He pulled me to his chest with one arm. He was using his other to hold us up on the tree limb. I breathed in his scent of pine and spring. As I did, the dull ache in my throat from my thirst for blood simmered more.
I missed the old days though. I missed being only human and not the anomaly I had come to be today. I was a third vampire, a third werewolf, and a third human. Doing the math, I was a whole lot of mess.
I suddenly heard Seth's stomach growl. I smiled at his human habit. "Go on back to the house to eat," I whispered. "I'll be there soon. I just need a few more minutes."
Seth sighed. He wanted to argue but he was hungry. "Fine... but if you're not at the house in an hour I'm coming back, okay?"
I nodded. He pressed his face to my hair for a moment, breathing in my scent, and then let go, dropping easily to the ground below. He walked away back towards the house, and as he did I watched him go until I could no longer see him through the thickness of the trees. Once he was gone, the ache in my throat came back.
I knew Edward was right. If I didn't feed tonight I would probably pass out tomorrow in my human form from exhaustion. That, or I would lose control and the vampire part of me would try to take over again. That part of me was always terrifying. It was always trying to take over.
Even as the years passed, the battle inside me continued as my wolf genes, vampire venom, and human anatomy clashed against one another. There was no peace... not unless I fed... there was never a moment when my body felt complete.
Shutting my eyes again, I listened to the irregular beat of my heart. As I did, I wondered what people would say if they ever heard my story. Would they tell me I was pitiful? Would they tell me I could've avoided so much pain if I just stopped trying to get answers? Would they tell me I was doomed from the start?
Honestly, I probably couldn't have changed anything even if I tried. Being the great-granddaughter of Ephraim Black, I was already destined for the supernatural before I was born. And when my brother, Jacob Black, went falling in love with a vampire's girlfriend it was only expected the supernatural would lock into me even harder.
I wasn't even sure who to blame for my end. Bella...? Jacob...? Sam...? The Cullens..? My great-grandfather...? My ancestors...?
Honestly, I was probably screwed from the day I was born.