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“Show me your wounds,” Cain said gently, placing a hand on Ash’s shoulder. The blonde was a shaking mess, hunched over against the graffiti-filled brick wall with unfocused eyes. Cain, Sing, Jessica, and Eiji could see the cuts and rope burn on his arms. All wounds that Fox inflicted on him. His white shirt was almost completely torn off his torso, save for a few dirtied scraps. His belt was fastened incorrectly, and his jeans and Converse were scuffed from the struggle he put up just hours earlier.
It was clear what Fox did before they showed up. And after doing so, he let his men physically torture Ash.
Ash flinched immediately at the feeling of Cain’s hand on him. He slapped Cain’s hand away, eyes still unfocused. He barely registered Cain asking what was wrong. The sight of Cain’s shocked face, along with Sing, Jessica, and Eiji, pulled him back to reality. He wasn’t in the room with Fox. He was no longer trapped. He was safe- no, he was saved by his friends. Ash glanced at Eiji before facing Cain.
He looked away, hiding the lower half of his face with his palm. He was still shaking. “Sorry, it’s nothing.” Ash limped to a nearby crate, deliberately avoiding eye contact with everyone. They watched silently as he sat down and curled himself into a ball, eyes focusing on a point in the distance. “I just need some rest.”
Ash breathed in deeply as he tried to stop shaking. His body was still sore, and the image of Fox still bounced around in his head. He curled into himself further, squeezing his eyes shut. He heard footsteps slowly approach him, and he looked up.
There Eiji was with a solemn expression on his face. Brown eyes met jade green ones. Still shaking, Ash felt a chill run down his spine as Eiji’s arms got closer to him. Thinking he was about to be hit, his eyes widened, only to be proven wrong when those same arms wrapped around him. Warm, comforting, safe .
Ash gradually stopped shaking the longer Eiji held him, staring emptily at the space in front of him. He didn’t even mind that some of Eiji’s tears were dampening the top of his head. Eiji hugged him tighter. “Let’s give them a minute, guys,” he heard Jessica tell the others. At the sound of their footsteps receding, Ash closed his eyes as he leaned against Eiji’s body more.
They stood there for a few minutes, the only sound filling the air being Eiji’s jacket rustling in the wind. For those few minutes, no words were needed. Eiji knew what Ash needed, and Ash was thankful for that. A few tears slipped out of the blonde’s eyes as he quietly sighed, the feeling of Eiji’s cargo jacket against his face oddly comforting.
He knew he loved Eiji. It was something that remained unspoken for a while. Thoughts that only floated around in Ash’s head when it was late at night and he finally had a moment to himself. Despite Eiji being such an energetic and innocent person, he accepted Ash wholeheartedly. It didn’t matter how many people Ash killed, how many bullets he shot out of his gun, or even if Ash was hurt like this. He still treated Ash like he was as perfect as Eiji was. Even now, with arms wrapped tightly around his body, Eiji was holding Ash like he was made of porcelain.
Ash shifted slightly, and Eiji took that as his cue to pull back. Ash immediately missed his warmth. He looked up at Eiji, who smiled at him, eyes slightly crinkled at the sides.
“I love you,” Ash said suddenly, to both of their surprises. His eyes widened when he registered what he said. Eiji’s face was frozen, his smile stuck in place. Ash grabbed one of his hands before whispering desperately. “Please tell me you love me too.”
A shadow cast over Eiji’s face as he stepped back. His eyes were mournful, mouth downturned ever so slightly. He was silent. Ash felt himself start to shake once more for an entirely different reason. He knew what Eiji was going to say next. Why did he have to be so stupid and open his mouth?
“I’m sorry, Ash,” Eiji whispered, taking another step back. “I don’t see you in that way.”
Desperation clawed at his throat as Ash threw himself to his knees in front of Eiji, still holding his hand. “No, you’re wrong! When you asked to hold my gun, how you’re always there for me, how you hugged me just now. You love me! Please tell me you’re joking.” Ash begged with a broken voice. He was crying now, squeezing Eiji’s hand in both of his.
Eiji looked down at Ash, his tears coming down stronger now. “I’m so, so sorry, Ash,” he continued. “I don’t see you as anything more than a friend. I’m sorry if I made you think otherwise.”
Ash continued crying, mentally telling himself to wake up. This was all a bad dream, right? He’d wake up and he’d be safe at the hideout. Eiji did love him. Nothing was wrong. Everything was peaceful. Right?
With every minute that passed, Ash was starting to lose hope. His heart clung to any bit of delusion he could come up with, still holding Eiji’s hand. Eiji never crouched to comfort him or wipe his tears. He stood there, stoic, as he wiped his own tears with his other hand.
“I’m sorry, Ash. I’m so sorry.”