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It's been almost 3 weeks since Fujisaki broke up with Yuri. They were dating for 6 months. Fujisaki was the happiest that time of course. Though they aren't a normal couple. Yuri was giving him all the attention by having sex with him almost everyday in every corner of the academy. They would switch mid intercourse and both of them found satisfaction. They've almost done every position possible. Experimenting with kinks, bruising each other with love bites.
Yuri would literally do anything to him and Fujisaki wouldn't care, as long as Yuri's happy. That's all he ever wanted. He loved him too much to even say anything and was too afraid that if he says something, he'd lose him. Even it means Yuri sleeping with other boys when they weren't together.
It was a Thursday morning. Yuri slept over at Fujisaki's dorm after their late-night sex. Fujisaki snuggled closer to his boyfriend when Yuri suddenly shot up. He got dressed right away and was about to leave, "Y-Yuri, where are you going?" Fujisaki yawns and rubs his eyes, his hair still a mess. "Go go!" Yuri motions his head outside, he leans his body on the door frame, and buries his hands inside his pockets. Right, they still have classes for two more days before the weekend starts.
"But class doesn't start for another two hours. Let's cuddle for a while, i-if you'd like of course." Fujisaki fidgets with the ends of his hair. "Can't. Have to go now! Bye-bye!" He didn't even think twice. "B-bye! I lov-" He was cut off by the door shutting close.
He sighs and rubs his neck, he hisses in pain and walks towards the mirror. He glances down his neck to his torso and legs, filled with hickeys. He groans in frustration and throws his shirt to the door. He runs his hand across his hair and sits down on the floor as tears run down his flustered cheeks. His heart sinks as he cries is confusion. A month ago he'd be jumping for joy knowing that Yuri marked him his with hickeys. But now, it felt wrong.
He lifts up his head and notices that Yuri left his shoes. He stands up, wipes his tears away, and gets dressed in a crewneck and some sweatpants. He walks down the hallway, shoes in hand. Other students are probably still asleep. He sighs when he suddenly hears moaning from a bush. He didn't want to get involved in their situation as he was about to leave when he catches a glimpse of pink in the corner of his eye. He drops the shoes while he watches his boyfriend fuck a random student.
Yuri lifts his head up from the sound of the shoes dropping. "Don't stop. What is it?" The boy rests his hand on Yuri's cheek as he pants from exhaustion. He looks down at him and shakes his head. He looks up again a bit to check while the boy kisses his neck but no one was there.
Fujisaki slams the rooftop door open, the cool morning breeze hitting his tear-stained face. He walks close to the edge and laughed loudly. Thinking about how the last time he did this, it was Yuri who saved him. Ironic isn't it? He even stopped slitting his wrists, letting them heal because he has Yuri now. His mind is filled with mixed signals. He's questioning himself why Yuri's actions are only affecting him now.
How could he be so foolish? Letting himself be used like that for the sake of Yuri's sexual desires. Every time Fujisaki tries to suggest that they do something else, Yuri doesn't even bother to listen. He'd either make random noises or run away from him. He'd only come back for their next round of intercourse. So Fujisaki stays silent, afraid that Yuri would run away from him again.
They've been dating for almost 7 months and for some reason, he hasn't said an 'I love you' back. Not a single one. Even if he did, it would've been a lie. Fujisaki chuckles to himself. 'Of course, who would love someone like me. A slut only used for pleasure.' Not once they've had a decent conversation. Let alone talk about love.
"This is so unfair!" He yells and laughs while sobbing. He leans forward a bit and laughs more. Just one more move and he can end it all. "I've done everything." He mumbles and lets go of one hand on the railings. A tear fell off his face and down to the ground. "He was toying with me and I fell madly in love with him." He sniffles. "Stupid."
He sighs and steps back. His sobs became worse, tears wouldn't stop flowing as he lays down on the rooftop floor. He hugs his legs tightly and falls asleep, the wind making him shiver.
A warm pair of lips wakes him up from his slumber. One kiss and then another. He stirs and opens an eye, meeting only a pair of shades on Yuri's face. Fujisaki sits up and touches his face, now dry from his tears from earlier.
Yuri was about to kiss him again but Fujisaki dodges him. His heart aches a bit. Fujisaki always kisses him.
"Hmm? Babu?" Yuri mumbles in question.
Fujisaki sighs, stands up, and was about to leave the rooftop when he halts.
"Why? Why is it that whenever we kiss, we end up having sex? Is sex the only thing that matters in this relationship?" He asks annoyed and turns back towards him.
"Mhm mhm! Sex so good!" Yuri moans and laughs.
"You're unbelievable. You sleep with other people while you're with me but it doesn't affect you at all. Have you never even thought about what I would feel?" What the hell is wrong with you?" Fujisaki sniffles. "What's wrong with me for being oblivious and letting myself be played like this."
Yuri doesn't say anything. He's just standing there.
"D-do you even love me? Actually, are you even aware that we're in a relationship in the first place? We never once acted like a normal couple. I wanted to go on dates with you. I wanted you to look at me as if you're scared to lose me and that we'll be together no matter what. Some nights that all I could ever think about." Fujisaki sobs even louder. He felt like ending it all and he will.
"Answer me! Do you love me or not!" He yells at Yuri. He felt like he couldn't breathe. He can't seem to control his sobs, his breathing uneven.
Nothing happens.
"I almost killed myself because of you!" He chokes on a sob as he stares at the boy he thought was the love of his life. "I can't believe I actually fell in love with someone like you." He steps towards Yuri and whispers.
"We're fucking done." He says and runs down sobbing to his dorm room.
While running, he felt relieved that he ended it already. Even though there was nothing that started in the first place. However, the pain is still there.
He runs past Tamura in an empty hallway who looked at him confused.
"Jimmy? What the hell?" He says when suddenly a flash of pink passes by.
"Yuri?! The fuck is going on?" Tamura yells as Yuri runs after Fujisaki. Yuri's a really fast runner and grabs hold of Fujisaki before he could run further.
"Let go of me! Fucking let go of me!" He pulls himself off his grasp and slaps Yuri hard across the face making his shades fall off his face which now has a light tint of red mark on it.
Fujisaki gasps at Yuri's golden orbs that are filled with anger and confusion. Fujisaki has seen his eyes a bunch of times ever since their first kiss together. He'd stare at them when Yuri allows Fujisaki to wash his hair when they bathed together. But his eyes were calm then. He never understood why Yuri hides his eyes. Something beautiful like that isn't worth hiding.
"Stay the hell away from me." Fujisaki sees Tamura from the corner of his eye, watching the two of them. He leaves them and isolates himself in his room.
"I'm sorry." Yuri watches with furry as he watches Fujisaki run away from him, unstoppable sobs coming out of his eyes. Yuri grips his hair and smacks the top of his head over and over.
"Wh-why? Fuck, fuck, fuck! Fuck!" He yells and runs his hand through his hair. His own stream of tears ran down his face.
"Hey, hey Yuri it's okay. Alright?" Tamura puts his hands on Yuri's face. Tamura has seen Yuri's eyes before but now they shine even more from his tears.
Yuri shakes his head, "N-no, n-not okay." His body trembles as his legs give up and collapses him to the floor.
That night Tamura tried to calm Yuri down with sex like what he did back to him when Yaguchi rejected him.
But Yuri didn't want to. It was the first time he rejected sex. All because of a certain boy.
Yuri had been thinking for 3 weeks about his situation with Fujisaki. He rarely thinks about why he's the way he is. Sleeping with a lot of people and not giving a fuck about him. How insensitive he is when it comes to Fujisaki.
But the truth is, Yuri does love Fujisaki. With all of his heart. He was afraid that if he becomes too attached, Fujisaki would leave him.
So he showed no signs of actually being a proper boyfriend who loves him completely.
But regardless, Fujisaki left him. It was mostly his fault. For not saying anything at all. Knowing that Fujisaki is also the one who's really attached to him.
A part of him wants to fix things. To tell Fujisaki that he loves him. That they could do everything romantic, just like what Fujisaki wanted.
But he also wanted Fujisaki to find someone better. He's afraid he'd make mistakes again. He deserves someone better to make him feel loved. Someone he can actually talk to. Yuri isn't big on words. He can only express himself through sex. Which he hasn't done in a while. His last time having intercourse would've been with Fujisaki if he didn't do it with a random boy by a bush the next day.
He misses Fujisaki's genuine kisses while having sex. Filled with love. His soft lips on his and the way their bodies are warmed up against each other. His soft 'I love yous' while he goes in and out of him. He just couldn't say it back. He'd just cover it up with a kiss and a bunch of hickeys.
The guilt that he's been feeling, he never meant for Fujisaki to be his sex toy. Of course he thought about it before they started dating. He just didn't think it would last this long. To the point where the love of his life almost killed himself. All because of him.
In the end, they both just didn't want to lose each other but never said anything to keep each other.