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Letting Bam join them in their mini vacation seemed like a good idea at first.
It’s normal for humans to have more fun when a dog is accompanying, and it could add some spice and a new element to the new season of In the Soop, they had already done it before by themselves and it was a nice experience, throw a dog in the mix and things could only get better, right?
Especially taking into consideration the fact that Jungkook had promised to take care of everything related to his furry son, including all of the smelly parts about being a dog parent.
And Bam was well trained, could you even call a dog polite? Because he was, didn't bark too much, followed his dad and uncle’s orders, usually did his deed where and when he had to… usually.
“Who spilled juice on my bed?”, asked Hoseok more curious than angry.
Taehyung comes through the door smirking, smiles are usually a good look on him but the I-know-something-that-you-don’t look doesn’t really suit him, especially when it is directed at him, “He thinks it’s juice”, he says while chuckling.
“Hyung, I’m so sorry.” In Jungkook’s defense, he does sound sorry at least, he enters the room and tries to kick out Taehyung with no success, the youngest’s eyes sparkle with guilt and he’s speaking in a pout, “I went on a walk and thought I had taken Bammie with me but it seems like he stayed in the house accidentally, he must’ve been sleeping around here when he felt the need to pee and he kinda did it on your bed.”
Hoseok’s mouth opens and closes very slowly, he thinks about who he used to be and who he is, how he would’ve reacted in the past and how he should react now – if he really is trying to become the best version of himself, this must be his ultimate test.
So he smiles. “Where am I sleeping now, then?”
Turns out, the universe really is testing him, showing him that, sometimes, even giving your best face to the problems doesn’t solve them any quicker. Having accepted the fact that his bed is ruined and that there’s no way they can get a replacement for tonight, he starts running through the list of possible bed partners.
Seokjin is out, being the oldest, he’s entitled to his privacy and always makes sure to make them remember that, holding the hyung card over Hoseok when he asks. “Seok-ah, hyung is really tall and broad, there wouldn’t be a way in which we could sleep without being in each other’s space”, he wiggles his eyebrows at that, “unless that’s what you want, of course.”
Hoseok decides he’s better off the situation that being in a bed with Jin would create, they played some games today and he’s quite tired, if he really wants to sleep, he’s going to have to stay away from Seokjin.
“We could also stay up and you could have a drink with me!” Jin’s laugh after saying that fades in the background as Hoseok makes his way towards Jimin’s room.
Jimin is a great option, he thinks, they even used to be roommates and slept in the same bed a few times, he doesn’t move around much, doesn’t snore and he’s an early riser. Very compatible with Hoseok.
But when he enters his room, he finds two beds joined together, Taehyung laying there sporting the same earlier expression that Hoseok is growing to hate. “I think there’s room for three”, he has the courage to say.
A sound that resembles a growl tries to fight its way out of Hoseok's throat, but he’s better than that now, so he contains it and just spins on his heels back to where he came from: the door.
Namjoon is not an option to begin with, he’s quite picky with physical contact, having to be the one to initiate it in order to feel comfortable, and he runs hot all the time, so he sleeps with little to no clothes and usually with light bed covers, Hoseok shivers at the thought.
Of course Jungkook had been the first one to offer since it was his dog the one who put them in this position to begin with, but his way of sleeping was very octopus-like, all long limbs tangling with whatever they can reach: pillows, bedsheets, even Hoseok.
“Please hyung, just sleep at my bed tonight, I will sleep on the couch”, the youngest pleads with his best pout, “is the least I can do.”
And to be fair, he’s right, –Hoseok feels a little proud seeing Jungkookie trying to take responsibility over his actions– this is all on him (on Bam too, kind of) so he should really just sleep on the couch while Hoseok gets his bed. But then again, he’s better than that now.
“It’s okay!” He pinches Jungkook’s cheek in assurance. “I’ll just go bother Yoongi hyung, you know he can’t resist this face.”
(Hoseok prays he’s right this time.)
Maybe he should’ve just asked Yoongi earlier, should’ve given in to his actual desires and selfishness. And maybe he’s not that good of a person and has been thinking of this outcome since Bam had his little incident. Imagining himself and Yoongi sharing a bed like they used to do sometimes, wondering what would happen, if Yoongi would allow it to happen and by that, allow Hoseok to imagine himself in a situation that was better than reality.
When he gets to Yoongi’s room, he finds him sleeping. Truth to be told, sleeping Yoongi is one of Hoseok’s favorites, it’s so easy to look at him and feel his muscles relaxing at the calm aura he spreads. Admiring the sleeping boy, Hoseok loses sense of time and it’s not long before something stirs up Yoongi’s peaceful sleeping (Hoseok will fight whatever it was that woke up his hyung).
“Seok-ah,” Yoongi’s sleepy voice does things to him, good and bad things, since the feelings aren’t mutual “what are you doing there? Come warm me up.”
It looks like Yoongi is doing grabby hands under the cover, Hoseok can’t tell for sure, but the mere possibility is enough to send a shiver down his body, he hurries towards the bed and takes off his socks, he’s never been able to sleep with them. Hoseok lays on the bed looking at the ceiling for a while, he can feel feline eyes watching him but is too scared to turn around.
“Why are you laying on top of the covers? You are going to catch a cold, c’mere.” Yoongi sounds firm so Hoseok just obeys and allows himself to be covered.
They are sharing warmth now, and Hoseok’s heart is on his throat, he wasn’t like this before, back then he could control himself around Yoongi, could hide his feelings behind his too touchy personality and big smile and the loving way in which he would look at the members and hope for the best. Hope that no one would notice how he would always lean towards Yoongi, do everything and more with him.
“Your feet are cold.” Yoongi states, does that mean their legs are touching? Hoseok can’t feel anything anymore, he’s a mere spectator on someone else’s body. “Put them closer to me, that will make it better.”
Oh, Hoseok is levitating, he’s going to die here on this bed. His last working braincell wonders if the cameras are rolling on Yoongi’s room, maybe this is a prank.
He’ll just sleep, Hoseok convinces himself, he’ll make it work, he’ll shut up and look at anything but Yoongi, he won’t let the relaxing feeling of his little vacation get the best of him, he’s not going to ruin this. He’s not a greedy person, what they have it’s good, it’s wonderful, it’s good enough, he doesn’t need more.
But he wants more, he wants so much more.
It’ll never be good enough, why can’t he turn around and hold Yoongi’s face in his hands?, in hopes that his feelings can be conveyed in the gentle touch, wishing that Yoongi can feel in the way Hoseok holds him, that he’s the most precious thing for him. Why can’t he hug him and be his big spoon? Why can’t he warm him up? Cold feet under a cover are intimate enough so why can’t Hoseok just kiss him?
His throat starts itching with something other than the urge to say something, these are unshed tears. If he dares to say something, he’ll break down, so he keeps quiet.
“What happened to us?” A tiny voice ends the silence, and all of Hoseok’s alarms go off because Yoongi sounds sad, so he turns to look at him. “Did I do something wrong?”
Yoongi is crying, Hoseok is actually going to die, and he deserves it, because how dare he make the person he loves the most shed a single tear. He wants to punch himself.
You’re better than this, he tells himself, you’re a mature adult who can talk about feelings and clear misunderstandings, you got this.
He doesn’t, “I, I am so so-sorry, hyung,” Hoseok starts crying “I ruined everything I am so sorry please I don’t want to lo-lose you.”
Yoongi enjoys being taken care of, but he will jump to the caretaker position if needed, and he’s damn good at it. “Seok-ah, look at me, baby, loot at hyung.”
Hoseok struggles with his words and has trouble with his irregular breathing, he wants to run away and escape Yoongi’s touch, he doesn’t deserve it, and doesn't know how to live without it either. Yoongi starts caressing his ears, knowing it calms him down. He pulls him close to his chest too, he makes his own breathing stable so Hoseok can follow.
“I’m sorry I made you upset, Hobi.” He says, this too good of a human, Hoseok would truly give him his heart in a silver platter without a single question.
He puts some space between them, holding Yoongi’s shoulders so the oldest can look at him while he speaks, “Stop, I should be the one apologizing, I made it awkward and you thought you did something wrong when you could never, and I mean it, Yoongi, you could never do anything wrong, not to me.”
Yoongi’s eyes shine with his own tears and Hoseok wants to kiss the sadness out of him, let him know he loves him and he’s perfect and–
“Then why were you avoiding me?”
Hoseok should die, lightning should strike right now and take him to the afterlife. “Oh hyung, I’m so sorry, I really went and fucked this one up with my feelings didn’t I?”
The eyes that are looking at him seem to catch up on something, because there was an interested glimpse to them now. “Feelings?”
He had made his bed, and now he needed to lay in it. After all, if he was truly a mature adult he could be honest and explain what had actually happened without a problem, the ultimate test, he reminded himself.
“I really like you, Yoongi.” He started, not knowing how to proceed, he had never imagined himself confessing, so he didn’t really have something planned out for this. “I’m in love with you, I’ve been in love with you, for a while, actually. So I didn’t really know how to act around you, I guess I just started avoiding you without noticing.”
Yoongi looks at him, his mouth opens and closes a few times and Hoseok waits for the blow, he has his heart on his hand right now, and he’s about to crush it.
“Kiss me.” Hoseok is dumbfounded, and it seems to show because Yoongi repeats himself. “I don’t believe you so prove it, kiss me.”
Hoseok can’t move, maybe he’s already dead. Yoongi rolls his eyes smiling before taking his face between his hands and pulling him closer, “I’m in love with you too, silly.”
And he kisses him, soft pink lips on his, an innocent touch at first, and Hoseok waits for the dream to end, for him to wake up and find himself on his actual bed.
But it doesn’t happen, Yoongi pulls away at the lack of response, and looks at him with a little smirk at his state. That seems to do it for Hoseok, this is actually happening, joy spreads through his body and replaces all the blood. His hands grab Yoongi’s face and he smashes his lips together.
Is more of an aggressive peck, he pulls away after it, letting a noise of contentment leave his throat, and then goes back to pecking Yoongi’s nose.
“Yah!” Yoongi complains when Hoseok pecks his forehead but that doesn’t stop him, he’s going to kiss his pretty face the amount of times he wants to, because now he can.
Hoseok made a mental note to buy something cute for Bam.