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Regulus walks up to the apartment he knows the marauders live in. James has taken him before. It’s in muggle London and Regulus finds himself wanting to stay here forever, where no one will recognize him. Where he can be free. But he knows better than to hope. Not while he’s here for a reason.
Regulus can hear laughter coming from the door as he stands in front trying to muster up the courage to knock. He knows James is behind this door. He hasn’t seen him since he showed him the Dark Mark. But James didn't understand. He doesn't understand that Regulus would have been killed if he didn't take it. That if he stayed with James like Sirius had he would have brought their parents right to his doorstep. They need an heir after all.
So here Regulus stands already having made his choice. It wasn’t really a choice. But he wants to be a better man. He wants to be good. And he knows that this one act does not make up for all the bad he’s done. All the things that he can't reverse. But he’s trying and that has got to count for something. Soon he won't have to worry about it.
He finally lifts his hand up and knocks. A few seconds later James is smiling down on him. But when he realizes it's Regulus his smile slowly fades. Regulus looks up at him, suddenly finding it very hard to breathe. “I need to talk to Sirius,” he says after a minute has passed.
Regulus knows that anyone else in his situation would never be this calm. But he’s known his whole life that his death would be painful. He’s known since he knew the concept of death. He has spent his whole life trying to survive that house, his own parents. So what's a little more pain if it's for a good cause? At least it’ll be over soon.
James turns to the side leaving the door open for Regulus to enter. He didn't think he’d be invited inside. Maybe James had a bit too much to drink. James walks ahead to the living room and calls Sirius. The moment Regulus enters the room they all go quiet. Lily, Marlene, Dorcas, and Mary are also here.
“What are you doing here?” Sirius asks, sitting up and looking surprised. He’s sitting on Remus’s lap. They all looked so happy before he showed up.
“I need to talk to you, Sirius.” Many emotions flash through Sirius’s face. He never was good at hiding them. He turns to Remus and whispers something Reg can’t hear before getting up and leading him into his room.
As they leave he hears the group resume talking but not as loud as before. They're probably wondering what he’s doing here. He turns around as Sirius closes the door behind him. When Sirius turns towards him he has a curious expression. “Why are you here? What do you want to talk about?”
While Regulus had planned out what to say he couldn't bring himself to go over that script he had prepared in his head. So he just stares at Sirius hoping he’d see through him and know this is goodbye. But they haven't talked in years without yelling at each other. “I-“ he tries to begin. He can't do this. He’ll just get straight to the point. He doesn't know how to tell Sirius goodbye without questions arising. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.
“Reg?” Sirius asks, looking concerned. He knows James told all of them that he has the mark. So why is Sirius still worried about him? “You’re kinda scaring me,” he says with a small chuckle.
“I just wanted to see you.” For the last time. The words going unsaid.
“What happened?” And for the first time in a long time Regulus finds himself wanting to cry. The last time he cried was maybe a month after James and him had broken up. When everything was too much. But those days were all a blur.
“Nothing. Nothing happened.” Reg tries to gather his thoughts. “I just-“ he tried again. “Every argument, every word we can't take back cause with all that has happened I think we both know how this story ends.” He knows Sirius knows.
“No, Reg,” horror flashing through his face as he finally understands what this is. “No,” he says, getting louder, “Whatever it is that you're planning, we can help. You don't have to do this alone-”
“It’s too late. I just wanted to see you. You have to understand. I can't live like this. I can't. I've been surviving my whole life and I am so, so tired, Sirius.”
“You can stay with us. You can live here. You don't have to go back.” Sirius has always been determined, but he’s not going to win with this one. Sirius already knows this but he’s not ready to let Reg go. Not his baby brother. There are tears in Sirius’s eyes now. “Please,” he begs, his voice cracking. “Please, I know we haven't talked in a while but I don't want to lose you. You’re my family. You’re my baby brother.”
“Only for a minute, I want to change my mind cause this just don’t feel right to me. I wanna raise your spirits. I want to see you smile. But know that means I’ll have to leave.” Regulus is crying now. He can't stop as the tears stream down his cheek. Sirius is too.
“I’ll do anything, Reg. Anything. Please don't. You can't-“ he gets cut off with Reg hugging him. They stay like that for a few minutes. With Sirius’s chin on top of Regulus’s hair, both of them sobbing. The memories of their childhood. Sirius doesn't want to let him go. And Reg can't bring himself to let go.
But he has to. He has to go. It’s time. He tries to pull away from Sirius but Sirius doesn't let him go. “Sirius, I have to go,” he rasps, his voice weak from crying. Sirius just shakes his head. Reg has to do something, he needs to leave. If he stays here any longer in his brother's arms he won’t be able to bring himself to complete his task.
Regulus casts a wandless spell. Sirius’s body becomes heavy as he sleeps. Regulus brings him over to the bed and tucks him in. He looks at his older brother. His black, wavy hair, how peaceful he looks. He kisses his forehead and turns to leave. He looks back one more time, standing there for a minute as silent tears drip down his neck, before he closes the door.
“Goodbye, Sirius,” he whispers one last time.
The apartment is quiet. He takes one last deep breath before he puts on the infamous Black mask. He doesn't bother wiping his tears. He just needs to get out of here. Now. As he walks past the living room to get to the front door, he glances to the side. He can tell by the looks on their faces that they heard it all. He doesn't care. It’s finally time.
As he stands outside their apartment he thinks of how James didn't follow him. James who sat there with teary eyes but didn't move.
It’s over.
The apparates to Kreacher.
The next day, the Daily Prophet stated Regulus Arcturus Black dead.
It killed Sirius that he didn't drag Reg out of that house kicking and screaming years ago if it would have saved him from this fate. That he was the one that made it out and left his baby brother with all the burdens and abuse. That he didn't try harder. He should have. He fucking should have.
Only love can hurt like this.