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Yuu was in the lockers panicked, trying to deal with a little incident happened during practice, apparently.
He'd not noticed, and fortunately neither had the team, when he got his period, but the situation wasn't any better now that he knew for he had stained his shorts of red oozing blood and his boxers were soaked.
It was a coincidence Yuu had felt like freshening up a bit and splashing cold water onto his face, eyes meeting his reflection in the mirror doing so.
Before even thinking of fixing himself he fell into silent pained sniveling.
He dreaded the way his body made him feel not at home wherever he went, he felt out of place.
He felt something was missing and something was superfluous.
If you asked him to point out what gave him the most dysphoria he'd say it was his breasts, small but still noticeable without a binder or baggy clothes on, and it wasn’t like he could do either twenty-four seven.
He let himself slump helplessly to the ground, leaning onto the wall, head down and hands in his hair.
Noya started pulling on it harder and harder as if the slight pain could make him forget all his problems, it usually was music that dealt with it but, this time, he had no access to it.
He began sobbing a little louder when, finally opening his eyes, he saw, now more clearly, the stain, proving to him it hadn’t all just been a bad dream.
It was then he sensed he’d fucked up, hearing the sound of nearing steps getting louder.
He had this odd gig he did: memorizing the sound, volume, and rhythm of his teammates’ footsteps just for the sake of it, therefore he could recognize the one walking towards his position was non-other than Azumane Asahi.
Not only had the third-year been his crush for two years now, but he also was his best friend, exception made for Ryu.
That realization set him off and he tried to compose himself, not wanting to worry the other or get asked questions he wasn’t willing to answer.
Of course, fate did not take his side and, when Asahi walked into the room, Yuu was all red and swelled up in the face, it was so obvious he’d cried, moreover, a tiny puddle of blood had formed below him.
There was no way of disguising the situation.
The ace looked down at the libero and mustered up the firmness to ask the fateful question “Hey Yuu, what happened? Why are you crying?” he asked with worry in his voice, leaning closer to his friend and sitting cross-legged beside him.
“I know it might look bad, you know with all the blood, but it’s really fine. No need to worry here.”
“What blood? Aaaaa” Asahi sprung in the air at notice, hurting his ankle in the fall “What the actual fuck Noya. What did you do?”
“Nothing I’m just on my period.”
“Oh my God are you okay?” he paused to ponder “Wait, do you think I’m stupid enough to believe you’re actually on your period?” his voice was not angry so much as hurt and confused.
“Is there some reason you wanna skip practice for?” he cleared his throat “Is it a girl? ‘Cause, it wouldn't be the first time, and yes Daichi knows about every time you did. You think you’d know this by now but men don’t get their menstrual cycle.”
“No no, you don’t understand. I’m actually on my period.”
“But that would make you…”
“Yes” such a simple and lightly given answer set off a whole new reaction, Noya got to see an expression on the friend’s face he’d never seen before, a look of absolute confusion in his eyes but a smile taking place on his lips.
They were so beautiful he wanted to kiss them right there, right now, they looked a bit chapped but like the rest of the face, he loved them.
He stared right at them as Asahi grew progressively closer cutting the distance between them, but not the way he longed for, it was just a hug.
“Of course,” Noya thought annoyed “he just had to deceive me when I’m already pretty much at my lowest.”
He scoffed out loud, unintentionally sharing with the other his thoughts on the matter.
“Is there something wrong? I mean, I know this is a hard moment for you but I do have to admit that I was kinda hoping for better feedback from the hug. I thought I was pretty snuggly when you leaned onto me during the movies every time we went in the last few months.”
Azumane scoffed in his turn “Guess it depends on your mood ah?” sounding offended.
“I will support you in your every step of this road gladly, but only as long as you let me.” his eyes were teary and his voice was trembling “If you don’t want me, there is only so much I can do.”
Asahi put distance between them, stood up, and asked Noya “What do you need? How can I help?” sounding cold.
“Well I need a pair of shorts, boxers, and pads…or tampons, those work too. Doubt you can help get me any tough.”
“I could ask Yachi or Kiyo-”
“Absolutely not, not an option!” he almost shrieked cutting him off “This wasn’t supposed to happen and nobody else was supposed to find out” his breath pacing up.
“Wait, someone on the team already knows this? Is it Tanaka?”
“Nope, it is not.”
Asahi gasped “We’re your best friends, why were we not the first choice? Did I do or say something that made you feel like it would be unsafe to tell me?”
“No, that’s not it Asahi let me-”
“Then why? Uh?”
“Would you just let me speak?” he screamed out loud in response to the doubting and misjudging tone of the friend.
Asahi’s face went blank, probably wasn’t expecting a shriek that loud since Noya had been barely speaking, almost whispering the whole time.
“It’s not ‘cause of something you’ve said or done. Daichi is the other person, but only cause he’s the captain. What I mean is, I didn’t tell him, he found out reading my documents needed for the club.” he started explaining with the other following attentively.
“When he confronted me about it, the world fell down crashing on my shoulders, I couldn’t bring myself to talk to him or even look him in the eyes for weeks. I did not tell you, or Ryu for all that matters, because I didn’t think I’d be able to go one month without you, and I still do.”
Asahi’s glare became suddenly soft and sweet, totally understanding “So that’s why.”
He shook that cute expression off his face right after tough “But what’s that have to do with you scoffing at my hug?”
“Nothing. You got it all wrong.”
“Elaborate.”
“It’s not like I didn’t appreciate it but it wasn’t what I wanted. I’d gladly take it now if the offer is still up.”
This one was a quick hug but just as painful for Noya as the first one.
“What did you want then?” the ace asked curiously.
The libero just wanted to stop there, before things went downhill, but when he felt Asahi lay a hand on his shoulder and start stroking it, he couldn’t hold it in.
Noya grabbed Asahi’s hand to place it on his own cheek “Let’s just go for it” he riled himself up without voice.
“I wanted you to kiss me” he sighed in relief afterward, a heavy weight taken off his heart, but then the paranoid brain kicked in, longing anxiously to get an answer the heart was too afraid to want.
“Wanted?” specifically asked Asahi.
“Still do.”
Noya closed his eyes, and next thing he knew, the distance between their lips had also been closed.
A short but slow stamp on the lips was enough to scare both guys off.
Surreal silence filled the room up so tight Noya felt as if he couldn’t breathe.
“You shouldn’t have done that” Yuu looked down “You only like me now that you know I don’t have a dick.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? You think it was easy for me to keep my feelings to myself for two entire years because I knew I didn’t have a chance to begin with, with your being a straight man?” The boy had almost gone hysterical.
Just when he seemed about to lose it, Yuu took the hand on his cheek and kissed it.
“So you’ve liked me back all along, uh?” his voice was completely different and sounded smug, finally recovered from the crying, as if seductive.
“Like you back?... Until today I believed to be victim of unrequited love, and now I discover you were really in the same situation. Well: it’s a relief actually.” he ended with a warm smile forming along his lips.
“You really mean that?” Yuu asked in disbelief.
“You don’t even know.” he said leaning in for seconds.
He was stopped though by Noya’s hands grabbing his face.
“This is exactly what I wanted but not the best situation.” the libero said alluding to the floor and his clothes being soaked in blood.
“Oh, oh that’s right.”
“I should have everything in my bag but I left it on the bench on the court.”
“Why would you-? Never mind.” he spared himself the trouble of understanding the other and quickly leaned in to finally steal a second kiss.
This time he wasn’t blocked.
“Still kinda need that bag.”
“Yes, yes, I'm going.”