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He remembered falling from heaven, crashing to the ground in a flurry of celestial energy and fire and explosions, white heat entering the atmosphere.
He remembered feeling helpless, looking everywhere for something to hold onto, something familiar in the slightest, though his efforts proved to be futile.
He remembered finding him, tall and strong, so sure and secure. He remembered finally getting a decent meal in the first time in… he didn’t know how long.
He remembered asking endless questions for hours on end, testing his patience, though he never once snapped at him. He’d helped him through it all, adjusting to what it meant to be human and the basics of surviving in society.
He remembered his first sip of alcohol as a mortal, the burn of the amber liquid hitting the back of his throat, feeling tipsy almost instantly. He remembered his dimples as he smiled down at him, helping him out to the car and helping him into the seat with care.
He most certainly remembered when he summoned all his courage and leaned up to press his lips ever so slightly against his, relishing in how smooth and fluid the kiss was, feeling it last for hours while in reality it was only a few seconds.
He remembered falling asleep to his steady heartbeat every night, the rhythmic thumping something like a lullaby to him. He remembered breathing in the rich, earthy smell that always accompanied him, the smell of cheap motel soap and traces of whiskey on his breath as their lips met.
He remembered retrieving his grace, but never forgetting his kindness, how he took him in while he was so weak and vulnerable and made him feel stronger than he ever had with his powers intact. He remembered the unbearable pain of not feeling, the strength inside him now blocking out all human emotion, though he still felt something, deep in his soul, buried in light and wavelengths but still there.
Almost like someone whispering in the next room over, “You love him. You love Sam Winchester.”