Chapter Text
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Joshua woke up. His dream got him wide awake, panting heavily as he tries to catch his breath. His head is hurting from the lack of oxygen. Buds of sweat are now forming on his forehead as he looked at his reflection in the mirror on top of his side table. Don't get him wrong, he LOVED his dream, it just caught him off guard because it showed his favorite member of the boy band named 7Teens tho they're no longer teens but because they debuted when they were, that's why they got that band name.
So it composes of 7 members. Starting with Kim Mingyu, he's a rapper and the tallest member of the group. He's a giant but he's really clumsy, he's handsome too but he already got a boyfriend. Next would be Mingyu's boyfriend, Jeon Wonwoo. He's a rapper as well and sometimes a sub-vocalist backing up their main. He's got a deep sexy voice that woos the people, not Joshua tho.
He's loyal to his baby.
There's also Chan and Hoshi, they are the dancers of the band, the ones who are making their outstanding choreographies, they're cute but still, not his type. Next is Jun, a dancer and also a sub-vocalist just like Wonwoo. He has attractive moles on his face but Joshua still thinks his favorite's mole is the most perfect. Vernon, the 6th member, is also a rapper just like Mingyu and Wonwoo, he also produces their songs but they have their own main producer but didn't release it to the media stating it's Hoshi's boyfriend. He is curious but respects their decision to keep it a secret. Maybe he's a non-showbiz person? He doesn't know.
Anyway, last but not the least, his favorite member and his so-called husband (in his dreams), Lee Dokyeom, is the main vocalist. He's the most handsome person he claimed he's ever seen in his entire life. Not exaggerated, he's really the coolest member he knows, his beautiful voice, making him head over heels for him, making his heart somersault listening to his heavenly voice.
He's also the reason why Joshua suddenly woke up from his sweetest dream. As he remembered,
He was just sitting on a bench underneath the tree, hiding in the shade of it, protecting himself from the harsh sun rays.
The location of the dream is a flower field, full of Sunflowers, covering the field color yellow. It was a very much pleasant view in his eyes as he remembers his favorite person, Dokyeom, he's really a ray of sunshine. The sky cooperated with his dream's mood; covered it with light blue, white cotton thick, and thin ball clouds joined the astonishing sky.
Picking a small Sunflower blooming on the root part of the tree, faint footsteps were heard behind him, crunching the dried grass falling from the tree where he currently relies on. He knows because he has some beside him as well, on the left part of the bench, dried leaves laying over each other.
He looked behind as he sniffed the Sunflower he picked up but abruptly let go as he realized who was behind walking towards him, it was Dokyeom! He's wearing his bear-themed matching pajama top and bottom. He got a cute curious face plastered on his as he's nearing Joshua. Panicking, he stood up and ran towards the Sunflower field and that's when he woke up.
It really felt so real. He thought if he just didn't panic, he would be able to speak to him, even if it's just in his dreams.
Frustrated, he glanced at his wall clock, it's already past 2 AM. 'I should get back to sleep, I still have a coffee shop to manage early today.' He thought as he lay down again, reaching out to his messy comforter to cover his slightly freezing body due to the room's low temperature.
Again, he's in the same location of his previous dream, as if continuing where it was left off. Sunflower fields cover almost all of his peripheral view. However, the strange thing is, there's already a man sitting on the bench he sat on earlier. Before walking toward him, he doesn't want to startle him so Joshua called his attention, "Hello, are you alon—"
It's Dokyeom! Again! He didn't leave?
What kind of a dream is this, showing him his favorite person?
He cleared his throat as he tried calming the hell out of his trembling fingers as well as the nerves inside his body. It's like he hears them shouting inside,
'Go to him!'
'Hug him!'
'This is your only chance!'
He shook his head. Even though this is only a dream, he still needs to respect his idol and give him his personal space. Joshua's really fighting the urge to jump on him and kiss all over his face. But he remained calm and offered the man in front of him a gentle smile as he repeated his obvious question. "Hello, are you alone, by any chance?"
He smiled and Joshua almost died. On the spot. 'Please have Jeonghan bury me here, surrounded by beautiful sunflowers.' he pleaded to no one. Dokyeom nodded and slid on the right part of the bench where Joshua sat earlier. He patted the left seat available next to him dusting off the leaves to empty the space, letting him know that he can sit beside the latter.
How can he refuse? Duh! It's his favorite person all over the world, offering the space beside his majesty, his loving and kind prince charming. He almost wailed, jumped, and danced as he's looking curiously at Joshua.
Oh, my gosh! I don't really wanna wake up.' He shouted deep inside as he walked towards the bench and sat beside him, leaving a space in between them.
"You're the one who ran earlier, right?" He started. The latter's finger flinched, actually his whole body wants to flinch but he remained calm and tried his best to steady his heart getting wild inside the chest.
'He remembered me! My dream version Kyeommie remembered me!' He hysterically thought, shutting his eyes close tightly and pursing his lip into a thin line preventing it to smile. He wants to shout and squeal loudly but, no. Joshua should be a sexy gentleman in his eyes since the first impression lasts. He can't make himself look up at those pretty round black orb eyes, his beautiful mole on his left cheek, he really wants to pinch it but kept his hands clenched on his lap and nodded.
"I'm sorry for running away earlier, I- I was startled when another person appear in my dream." He chuckled nervously as he inhaled a lungful of air and sighed silently.
"Your dream? I thought you were the one invading my dream." The latter's statement made Joshua look up at him, and accidentally made eye contact, he hurriedly averted his gaze and instinctively picked a Sunflower beneath him with slightly shaking fingers.
'What does he mean I'm invading his dream? I clearly remembered sleeping inside my bedroom tucked with comforters'. He unconsciously sniffed the Sunflower while remembering what happened just minutes ago so he asked still not looking at him.
"What do you mean by your dream? I remembered sleeping in my own bedroom." He said as he rested his back on the bench, looking up to the sky still holding the delicate flower between his hands. When his long-sleeved sleepwear was pushed back showing his wrist, it shows a dark red crescent moon-shaped birthmark. The mark didn't go unnoticed by Dokyeom, thinking it was really familiar and looks like a tattoo but he didn't dwell on it.
He clears his throat to get Joshua's attention and held his right hand in front of him, not minding what he said and changing topic. "Hi, I'm Seokmin by the way, what's your name?" he introduces himself, Joshua almost scoffed at his abruptly made nickname but accepted it anyway, gathering all the courage in the world to face Dokyeom, staring at his eyes as he clasped his other free hand and the latter's shaking it slightly, "I'm Jisoo. Nice to meet you." he politely smiled, still shaking the other's hand.
The thing is, the name he provided wasn't a nickname since that's his real name. He just gave it to Dokyeom since the other introduces an unknown name. He's known as Lee Dokyeom and no other names besides that. Not that he knows of. Both of them let go at the same time.
"So, Jisoo. How did you end up here?"
His Kyeom asked as he also picked up a lying small Sunflower beside his feet, sniffing gently its scent. It was the first Sunflower Joshua picked before he ran away, realizing it, Dokyeom smiled.
Joshua unconsciously smiled at the view he's seeing, still feeling like it's real— hoping, it's real. He inhaled and directed his attention to the flower twirling between his fingers, "I don't really know. I just slept inside my room and voila, I'm here. It's the first time it happened." and whispered softly 'And hopefully not the last.'
Dokyeom heard it but pretends he didn't and changed the topic instead, "I see. It wasn't my first time here. It's almost a month since this happened. It's nice to be here, away from the crowd of fans, away from singing and dancing practices, and I enjoy seeing the Sunflowers. It makes my head clear." He said as he looked up at the swaying tree due to the gust of wind passing them. His hair getting disheveled from it.
Joshua realizes, eyes wide and facing Dokyeom "W-wait, you're real?!" his mouth opens from the surprising revelation he just heard. So that means, Dokyeom, his favorite person is the one beside him, he's real!
"Uh, yeah? I'm a real person. I have a life in the outside world." He chuckled lowly, brushing his messy hair upward with his right hand, the other still holding the flower.
Joshua stayed still, unmoving, still not registering in his mind that the dream he's currently at, his dreamed man sat beside him, looking so astonishing with his adorable pajamas. Looking oh-so hot running his fingers through his hair.
"Jisoo? Are you okay?" He was out of his trance when the man beside him spoke softly.
"U-Uhm, yeah. I-I'm fine. Thank you for asking." He whispered as he sat properly, directing his sight on the yellow field dancing lightly together with the leaves, dragged by the wind.
"That's great. Why were you shocked, do you know me in the outside world?" He curiously asked and Joshua saw in his peripheral view that Dokyeom shifted on his seat and faced him directly.
"No." Joshua denies it instantly, not removing his attention from the field. If you'll ask him, he doesn't know as well. He just felt it was the right thing to say at the moment, tho his heart clenched when he denied it. On the outside, he's the proudest of them being their fan. He even has Dokyeom's posters posted and some of them hanging on his wall.
Dokyeom sighed, relieved the latter doesn't know him. Joshua finally looked at him when he heard the sighing. "Why do you ask?" he softly asked.
"I just don't want our— my fans to know me beyond the outside world. I just want them to stay as my fan, admiring me behind the lines. I don't know, but I really don't want to start any relationship with any of them."
The confession Joshua just heard is making his world inside— his heart shatter. All his fantasies of him and his Kyeommie ending up together won't happen at all. He unconsciously reached out to his chest, crumpling his sleepwear which Dokyeom noticed instantly.
"Hey, are you fine?" Jisoo looked at himself and realized he was holding his top tightly on his chest. He abruptly lets it go and smooths the crumpled part "Oh, it- it's itchy. I'm fine, thanks." he softly said as he laid his head on the bench as he rested his back. He sighed, not realizing what he felt for the singer is already way beyond what he should be feeling.
He already crossed the line.
Not that the man beside him needs to know, though. If possible, he wants to be here again.
"How would you know you need to wake up from here— this world?" Joshua asked still staring at the tree above them. The sun is now hiding slightly from the clouds above, preventing its sunrays to reach some parts of the field.
"I don't know. I just walk out when this world starts getting gray, removing the colors from the view, leaving it grayscale."
"I see. You never stayed longer than that?" he softly asked again, curious about this world. Dokyeom shook his head. "I'm afraid not. It's scary staying in the world without colors, everywhere you look is gray, I don't want to stay longer than that," he explained.
"Speaking of," as the sun hides behind the thick cloud completely, the world's starting to turn into grayscale, signaling them to wake up already from this world— from their dream. It's slow and Joshua still finds it fascinating since he also likes dark colors.
Dokyeom stood up, offering Joshua his hand to assist him in standing up, too. Joshua smiled weakly when he remembered the confession, he suppressed the butterflies he's feeling inside his stomach; knowing they'll just die from starvation— lack of reciprocated love.
He accepted his hand and was about to let go because he really don't want to let his feelings grow stronger but then the latter held it tightly, shock plastered on Joshua's face as he looked from their hands, up to his Kyeom who's smiling shyly.
"I don't want you to get lost." He reasoned out. Joshua just nodded and let it go. Erasing the warmth feeling he's currently experiencing inside his tummy. Those were the butterflies in his stomach, fluttering their wings wildly inside as if they want to go outside, and experience their own freedom.
"Here, this is the way to the outside world." Dokyeom guided him to the field of Sunflowers, already an expert after being here more than a month. It seems the running away of Joshua to the field was long forgotten.
He nodded again and let Dokyeom lead the way but he stopped walking at the center of the field. Curious Joshua peeked at the latter's face "Why did you stop—" He was taken aback and leaned back when Kyeom suddenly turned around to face him. "Will you," he stops, rubbing his hand on his nape, "Will I?" Joshua encouraged him to continue.
"Will you come here again?" He asked quickly shutting both his eyes close while waiting for Joshua's reply. He chuckled softly, covering his mouth with the back of his free hand holding the flower he picked up earlier, eye smile showing.
"Actually, I don't know." He smiled, not reaching to his eyes while unconsciously thumbing Dokyeom's hand, and slightly reached out for the other Sunflowers, patting them gently before looking at the other man's reaction. He's visibly upset from what he heard.
"But I want to be here again." He said again, repeating what he whispered on the bench earlier, and roamed his eyes, the view has now turned into grayscale. Still a beautiful but sad sight in Joshua's eyes. He didn't even see the smile on Dokyeom's face when he said those words since the flowers still got his attention.
The confession still crosses his mind every now and then. He looked at Dokyeom after seconds of silence and offered Dokyeom to wake up already, from this unbelievable dream.
He doesn't even want this to end, but then, he also doesn't want to get hurt by assuming things such as their hands intertwined and was initiated by his beloved.
"Let's go," Dokyeom said softly as they went further on the field, he held his hand and the flower on the other tightly, don't want to let go, don't want to wake up.
But he did.
He sat up as he felt his eyes slightly damped from the tear that managed to escape his right eye before they went back to the outside world. He noticed he was still holding something in his left hand.
It's the flower, tainted with both yellow and gray colors. He smiled at the thought, it was really a dream that he needed to wake up from.
"At least I got to see his face closer and even held his hand, even if it's just a dream."
He settled the flower on top of his side table as he got up from bed and started fixing it, preparing to go to his work, the coffee shop.
He really feels heavy as he remembered what happened clearly, even recalling the confession Dokyeom made.
"I just don't want our— my fans to know me beyond the outside world. I just want them to stay as my fan, admiring me behind the lines. I don't know, but I really don't want to start any relationship with any of them."
He shook his head and lightly slapped his face, getting himself together. He, then went inside his bathroom to start preparing.
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