Chapter Text
Natasha huffs and sips her coffee, dragging her feet up the stairs to her apartment. She is having the worst day, and she just wants to flop down in bed and sleep until February.
She turns the corner to her hall and sees a bunch of boxes blocking her way to her door.
“You have got to be kidding me,” she grumbles, trying to maneuver around them.
“Oh, I am so sorry,” a female voice says, and Natasha stops her climbing to see a tall woman with dark brown hair standing in the open doorway to the apartment next to hers. “I’m moving in right now and things are getting a little messy, as you can see.” The woman gestures to the boxes Natasha is currently straddling.
“It’s okay,” Natasha says, her concentration temporarily back on climbing over the boxes. She shifts her weight to her right leg and swings her left leg over the box so that she is standing upright on the other side.
“Maria Hill,” the woman says, holding out her hand for Natasha to shake.
“Natasha Romanoff.” For some godforsaken reason that can only be explained by Maria’s tantalizing blue eyes, Natasha gives her real name.
She also notes that Maria had a firm handshake. There are calluses on the palm of her hand, but the rest of her skin is incredibly soft. Natasha feels herself blush a little bit and lets go of Maria’s hand.
“Welcome to the building. I’m the one right there.” She points to the door next to Maria’s.
Maria smiles warmly. “Well, I should probably get back to unpacking so I’m not barricading the hallway. It was nice to meet you, Natasha.”
“I can help, if you want,” Natasha blurts out.
She bites her lip. She hadn’t meant to say that, but she doesn’t regret the offer. Maria is pretty and makes her heart flutter, and her bed will be there later. In a sleep way, not a sex way, though she wouldn’t be opposed to the latter.
“Are you sure? I can’t ask you to do that.”
Natasha nods. “I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to.”
Maria smiles with her teeth, and Natasha swears her heart skips a beat.
“Then you can start with that box right there.” She points to the box Natasha had climbed over. “I think those are dishes. Cups go in the cabinet directly above the sink and plates are in the one to the right of it. Thank you so much for doing this.”
“It’s no problem.” Natasha bends down and opens the aforementioned box.
Maria’s apartment is the exact same as hers, just not moved into quite yet. But the layouts are the same, and that makes it easy for Natasha to navigate. She empties the box of dishes into the allotted spaces and returns to the doorway for further instructions.
“Thank you so much for helping,” Maria says when they finish about an hour later. “There has to be something I can do to repay you.”
An image of her and Maria twisted in bedsheets flashes through Natasha’s mind, but she shakes the thought away and says, “I already told you it’s nothing. I enjoyed spending time with you.”
Maria’s cheeks turn slightly pink and she smiles sheepishly, and Natasha thinks it’s the cutest thing she’s ever seen.
“At least take something .” Maria disappears into the kitchen for a second and returns with a bottle of vodka. “You seem like a vodka drinker. I’m assuming.”
“You assumed right. It was probably the last name,” Natasha jokes with a smile, taking the bottle from Maria’s outstretched hand. Maria laughs, and Natasha thinks she could just float straight through the ceiling. “Thank you. If there’s anything else you need, I’m right next door. It was very nice to meet you, Maria.”
“Nice to meet you, too. And thank you again.”
“Stop saying thank you!” Natasha laughs, smiling and shaking her head. “See you around.”
When Natasha finally enters her apartment, her black cat Liho immediately starts intertwining herself around her ankles.
“Hey, Liho baby,” Natasha greets, bending down to scratch between her ears. Liho purrs contentedly. “I have so much to tell you about. We have a new neighbor — Maria — and I think I’m in love with her already.”
That last part is an exaggeration, of course. Maybe. Possibly. Not really.
“And I’m so exhausted,” she adds, scooping Liho up into her arms and carrying her to the bedroom. She lets Liho leap onto the bed while she turns to get ready.
“Maybe you will meet her one day,” Natasha tells the cat as she digs through her drawers for her pajamas. Then, realizing what she just said and remembering how sneaky Liho is, she turns back around and points her finger at Liho scoldingly. “That is not permission to sneak over there, though. Do not. ”
Liho meows and licks her front paw in response. Natasha sighs and crawls into bed, and Liho immediately settles herself on Natasha’s stomach.
“If Maria ever sleeps here, you will be kicked out of my bed.” A purr. “I don’t think you really wanna be in here with us anyway,” Natasha chuckles, a faint flush rising up her chest and neck at the thought.
She falls into a peaceful sleep filled with dreams of dark hair and icy blue eyes.
The next time Natasha sees Maria, it’s 4AM on a Saturday morning. She has just left a girl’s — whose name she couldn’t remember for the life of her — apartment and is about thirty seconds away from collapsing.
She fumbles trying to put her key in her lock, and Maria exits her apartment in workout gear.
“Need help with that?”
Natasha jumps about a foot in the air.
“God, a li’l warning nesst time?” she slurs. So maybe she’s still a little drunk.
“I basically slammed my door just now and you didn’t react at all,” Maria points out, and Natasha glares at her mockingly. “Fun night?”
Natasha laughs a little and says, with an air of remembrance about her, “Oh, yeah.” She laughs some more. “Very fun, if you know what I mean,” she finishes with a waggle of her eyebrows. “Too bad I di’n’t get her number. Or her name.”
She thinks for a moment before shrugging and going back to opening her door. After a couple more tries, she successfully opens it and cheers.
“Why are you up so early?”
“Going for a run,” Maria answers, gesturing to her workout attire. The really tight workout attire that shows off her arms. Natasha stares, her mouth opening slightly, before she catches herself and meets Maria’s eyes. Maria, who clearly noticed the staring, looks amused.
“…at four in the mornin’?”
“Yup.”
“Why woul’ you do that to yoursel’?”
Maria just shrugs and says, “Military habits, I guess. You should probably go get some sleep.”
“Oh, yeah.” That reminds Natasha how tired she is, and she yawns. “Wasn’t really sleepin’ earlier. Have fun on your run.” She winks and disappears inside her room.
Natasha wakes several hours later to Liho curled into her side and a hangover big enough to put Clint to shame.
Clint notices something’s up the second he lays eyes on her.
“Who’s the girl?” he asks, pushing past her and settling himself on her couch. He kicks his feet up on the coffee table and reclines his head into his hands.
“Just a hookup at a bar,” she answers, her hand absentmindedly finding the hickey on her neck. A token of the girl’s gratitude for the mind-blowing ora—
“Not that girl. The other girl,” he says with a wave of his hand, interrupting her thoughts.
“What other girl?”
“Don’t play dumb with me. I can see it in your eyes. You’re completely infatuated with someone. Who is it?”
Natasha rolls her eyes. “None of your business.”
“So you admit there is a girl!”
“None. of. your. business.”
“Is it someone from work?” he presses. “Ooh, is it Pepper ? Falling for the boss. Dirty. You could be in a porno.”
“Ew!” Natasha exclaims, her face scrunching up in disgust. “And no, it’s not Pepper or anyone from work. Besides, Pepper’s not even my boss, and she never was.”
“Did the room next door finally get taken?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. Natasha feels herself blushing, and she knows she’s been caught. “Wait, seriously? I have to go meet her.”
When he stands up from the couch and makes a beeline for the door, Natasha springs into action and grabs his wrist. Liho meows from her perch on top of the curtain rod.
“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” Natasha snaps. Her grip on Clint’s wrist tightens, and he winces.
“To meet her,” he says simply. “And give her the shovel talk, of course.”
“Don’t you dare,” she hisses, but Clint just jabs a finger into her side to tickle her and frees himself from her grasp.
“Too late, I’m already there,” he taunts, opening the door and bolting to Maria’s door.
By the time Natasha gets to him, he’s already knocked and the door is opening.
“Can I help you?” Maria asks with a raised eyebrow. She looks entirely unamused by Clint’s enthusiastic expression.
“Just thought I’d meet the new neighbor,” he says. Natasha’s made it to his side by now, arms crossed and a scowl on her face. Maria glances in her direction and her grouchy demeanor is replaced by one of mild entertainment for about half a second. “I don’t live here, but I’m around enough that I basically do. I’m this one’s brother in everything except blood.”
He wraps his arm around Natasha and gives her a noogie, much to Natasha’s chagrin. Maria’s frown is replaced with a full-on Cheshire cat smile at the sight.
“Get off me, Clinton,” she says, pushing him away. She smooths out her hair and says, “Sorry about him. He’s just excited to meet the person who finally moved in next door to me. It’s been unoccupied for a while now. We’ll just get going.”
As she grabs Clint’s arm and drags him back to her apartment, he calls out, “Nice to meet you!” and then the door slams in his face.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Natasha all but screams. She can’t raise her voice too loudly due to the unfortunate circumstance of extremely thin walls. “Now she knows we were talking about her!”
“It’s your duty as my pseudo-sister to introduce me to your future wife,” Clint says and Natasha huffs. “Since you didn’t do that, I took it upon myself to do it for you.”
“I’m not ever getting married. You know that. Love is for children.”
“Love is not for children. Look at me. I’m married and very much in love.”
“Yeah, and you’re one big child,” Natasha snarks. Clint’s jaw drops in disbelief. “Besides, Laura is a former agent. She knew what she was signing onto when she married you. Hell, she was your partner on all your missions when she married you! Maria is just some random civilian that I will be dragging into this mess of a career if I get even remotely close to her. It’s best that we just stay friendly neighbors.”
“I didn’t know ‘friendly neighbors’ look at you like they want to rip your clothes off with their teeth,” Clint says with finger quotes.
Natasha scoffs. “She does not look at me like—”
“Yes, she does.”
“No, she doesn’t.”
“Yes, she does.”
“No, she doesn—I’m not even going to bother. Her getting into a relationship with me is practically a death sentence.” Natasha throws her arms up in exasperation and flops on the couch. Her knees are over the arm rest so her legs are dangling down.
“She can handle herself,” Clint says.
“How do you know that? You met her for the first time, like, three minutes ago.”
“The way held herself and how her boots were laced. She was in the Marines. You’re not the only super spy around. I notice things, too.” Natasha hears him shuffling around in the kitchen for a minute before he comes back with what sounds like a bag of chips. It better not be her new bag of Cool Ranch Doritos or she’ll kill him. “Speaking of the military, will you help me train the new recruits tomorrow?”
Natasha lifts herself up on her elbows to see Clint pouting at her with enormous puppy-dog eyes. She’s about to roll her eyes when —
Dammit, Clint! she thinks. That is my new bag of Doritos!
With a withering glare and the most venomous voice she can muster, she answers with, “What does that have to do with the military? And you know how I feel about the newbs.”
“One of them was recruited directly from the military. I promise you can have that one, and I will deal with the rookies. I just want someone there with me. Pleeeeeaaaasssseeee? ”
Natasha squints and thinks for a moment before, “Fine! But you owe me two Costco bulk boxes of family-sized bags of Cool Ranch Doritos. One of those is for that,” She gestures to the chips in his hand, and Clint at least has the decency to look sheepish, “and the other is for roping me into this hell.”
“Deal. Thank you so much, Nattie.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“You love it.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Yes, you do. See you tomorrow! 0800 hours in the training room!”
He’s out the door before Natasha can get another word in. She groans and flops back down on the couch, mentally punching herself (and Clint) in the face.