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You were bringing your boyfriend with you home. He was going to meet your crazy family for the first time. You had only been dating Henry Cavill for six months. He had already introduced you to his family within the first month of your relationship, while you were a little more hesitant. Well, a lot more hesitant. Your family were a little more… what’s the word?… conservative. Your own father still had quarrels with his siblings, parents, and other family members, because he married a woman 13 years his junior. It wasn’t like there was a massive age gap between you and Henry, eight years weren’t that bad, but you never knew with your family. They could make you shrink to the size of an ant with just a look and a tsk-sound.
Your stomach was in knots as Henry drove you to your parent’s home. There were at least nine cars in the driveway. You swallowed the clump that was stuck in your throat. Henry took your hand in his and squeezed.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. It’s going to be alright.” He whispered and kissed your knuckles.
“You don’t know my family. They are the most judgemental people on the planet.” You whispered back.
“What, they don’t like English men?” He chuckled.
“That, and the fact that you’re eight years older than me. Everything above four years older is looked down on.”
“Let’s wait and see.”
“And you being an actor is not helping my case,” you continued rambling, “Maybe the children will love the fact that I’m dating Superman, but the older people don’t watch movies much, and especially not superhero movies.”
Henry shut you up by kissing you. All your nerves calmed down for a moment as he expertly moved his tongue with yours.
“Now, let’s go meet your family.” He breathed.
Your parents greeted you at the front door. They had already met Henry on several occasions back in London. You could hear the children running around in the back yard and a baby, your cousin’s youngest daughter perhaps, wailing somewhere.
As you walked towards the back yard, the children swarmed you with hugs, as they told you that they had missed you and asking what kind of presents you had brought with you this time. You shook your head and told them that you brought Superman, they all rolled their eyes, thinking you were lying until Henry stepped outside. Their little minds were blown away as they scrambled to get a touch from Superman himself. They asked him all kinds of questions in your native language, which Henry didn’t understand, but your mother came to his rescue, as she was an ‘outsider’ as well, from another country that spoke another language.
Your cousin walked out from having tried to calm her baby down in the living room. She gave you a quick side hug while bouncing the baby. The children having gotten all their answers went back to playing on the trampoline.
“So, this is your boyfriend, huh?” Your cousin asked as Henry walked over to you, pulling you close to him and smiling towards your cousin and the baby.
“Pleasure to meet you, I’m Henry.” He said and extended his right hand, which your cousin shook with a bit of difficulty as the baby was trying to wiggle out of her arm.
“Nice to meet you too, I’ve heard much about you. I’m sorry, Mellie isn’t very fond of big crowds, so she might be in a sour mood all day.” Your cousin said with a bit of sadness in her voice. You looked around your family, not really wanting to introduce Henry to them, but then an idea lit up in your mind.
“Why don’t you let Henry try and comfort her? He’s very good with babies. He has an army of nieces and nephews. Then you can relax a little.” You said and reached for the wiggling baby, who grabbed your T-shirt in her small fists. Your cousin reluctantly let her go.
“Are you sure?”
“Let me show you.”
You handed the screaming baby to Henry, who cradled her in his big muscular arms. She stopped crying the moment her head touched his chest above his heart. His steady heartbeat could soothe any angry baby. Your cousin’s eyes widened in surprise.
“How on earth did you do that?” She asked, “I’ve been trying to make her stop crying for over an hour. Did you use magic or something? What’s your secret?”
“No magic here, madam. Babies just like me.” Henry smiled; he rested the baby on his shoulder as he patted her back. His hand larger than the baby’s back, almost swallowing her whole.
“Well, whatever you did, thank you. I’m going to go get myself something to eat. Let me know when she needs changing or gets hungry.”
“Oh hush, give me the diaper bag. I know you have formula in there. We’ll look after this baby, while you go give your other children some attention.” You said and pulled at the bag on your cousin’s shoulder. She handed you the bag and with a big smile on her face, left to find food and then check on her two older children.
“What is your plan, sweetie?” Your mother asked.
“Nobody in this family will yell at a man with a sleeping baby.” You told her.
“You, my darling baby-girl, are a sneaky little one.” She kissed your cheek and left to find your father. You looped your arm through Henry’s free one and dragged him slowly to the group of uncles and male cousins, who were giving you the stinky eye.
“It’s good to finally see you.” One of your uncles said as he hugged you. The rest gave you either side hugs or shook your hand, everyone shook Henry’s free hand.
“How is my granddaughter?” Your other uncle asked Henry and nodded to the sleeping baby.
“She is absolutely a delight, sir. Nodded off as soon as she got into my arms.” Henry told him with a soft smile.
“She has a temper. Everyone in this family has. If you have children with my niece here, they will wail all night long too.”
“Perhaps, but when your niece and I have children, I will gladly walk the hallways all night for my own crying baby.”
There was a grumble of acknowledgement from all the men. You nearly did a victory dance. Henry had won over the men in your family, now on to the worst part, the aunts and female cousins. You gulped as you led Henry towards a large wooden table, where all the women sat and chatted away.
“Hello darling, long time no see. How are you?” Your aunt asked as she kissed both your cheeks.
“I’m well, thank you. This is my boyfriend, Henry.” You introduced Henry as you went around, hugged and kissed every cheek around the table. All your aunts went to kiss both Henry’s cheeks and pull him close, so close in fact that their bosoms were squashed all over his chest. He carefully moved the baby higher up his shoulder as to not let the baby be squeezed between them, and not to wake her up.
“So nice to finally meet you. How old are you?” Another aunt chimed in and gave him two huge smack kisses on his cheeks that left lipstick marks.
“Wonderful to meet you too. I am 36.” He told them.
“Why did you find such an old man, darling?” A third aunt asked you. You sighed.
Oh boy, here we go.
The women weren’t going to invite Henry into the family without a fight.
“Aunt Liz, there is only eight years between us.” You said between clenched teeth. Your parents moved towards you with concerned looks. Your eyes begging for their help.
“He is too old for you to have children with. You should find someone closer to your own age.” A fourth aunt said.
“Besides, dear cousin, you aren’t young anymore. You need someone with young sperm.” Your eldest cousin told you in a teasing tone. You started blushing, not wanting to talk sperm or eggs nor how to make babies, with them.
“I think we’re good in the children’s department. When we’re ready to have kids, we’ll have kids. Besides, I have four brothers, and they all have children, so no worries about my ageing sperm, they are quite healthy and plentiful.” Henry said with a cheeky smile. A soft blush was rising from his neck and up. His heart must have been beating faster as it woke Mellie, who started fussing.
“Here, let me take my granddaughter since you upset her.” Your aunt Liz said and outstretched her arms towards the baby.
“It’s alright. She’ll be content in just a minute.” Henry said, as he moved the baby to cradle her in one arm, while he stroked her blonde hair with his other hand, but she fussed a little. Henry started reciting a poem by William Blake:
“I have no name
I am but two days old.
What shall I call thee?
I happy am
Joy is my name,
Sweet joy befall thee!
Pretty joy!
Sweet joy but two days old,
Sweet joy I call thee;
Thou dost smile.
I sing the while
Sweet joy befall thee.”
His voice was low and husky. The poem was one of your favourites, so he had memorized it. You had once told him that your maternal grandmother had recited that poem to you when you were a baby, and she had handwritten it down for you to tell your own children. The note had been framed and was hanging in your office.
All your aunts, cousins, even your parents sighed, when Henry finished the poem. Your mother had tears in her eyes, as she also knew the poem inside out. The baby had been lulled back to sleep by Henry’s deep soothing voice.
“Well…” Your aunt Liz started, “Henry, you may be older than what we’re used to here, but you have a good head on your shoulders, and my granddaughter obviously like you, so, welcome to the family.”
You heard your father let out a breath of relief. Both you and Henry wore bright smiles on your faces. All the stress from thinking your family wouldn’t accept Henry washed away. He had won them over, changed their minds about age.
A few hours later you were driving back to your hotel.
“Your family wasn’t so bad.” Henry noted.
“That’s because you charmed them to death by holding a baby and reciting a poem about a mother and her joyous baby.”
“What can I say? I am an English gentleman; charm is my middle name.”
“I’m just glad that the age difference isn’t a problem with them anymore.”
“Darling, age is just a number.” He said, as he helped you out of the car and kissed you senseless in the parking lot underneath a starry night.