Chapter Text
The first time Lee Luda understood what soulmates were, she was just five years old. She could barely spell her name correctly when she saw the small drawing of a flower in her hand. As innocent as she was, her first question was immediately made to her mother, who gently explained to her what soulmates were.
All people in the world had a half, a perfect person to be with for the rest of their lives and the only way to communicate with these people was through their skin. What you wrote on your skin automatically appeared on your soulmate's. Her mother also explained to her that she was not allowed to give her real name and age ahead of time, as the person might not be the same age as her. Fate would be able to unite them when the time came, no matter what they did.
Five-year-old little Luda thought her soulmate was her Prince Charming, as the stories said. That when the time came, the other person would show up on her doorstep and ask her mother for her hand in marriage, so they would live happily ever after.
But as she grew older, Luda realized that her soulmate had a very agitated mind. Her arms spent the day covered in pen ink or gouache ink, with designs that were difficult even for her to describe. Luda was getting more and more confused and when she learned how to write, the first thing she put on her skin was “what do these drawings mean?” but then it all stopped.
For a long time, she didn't receive any kind of drawing. This lasted about ten years, until adolescence arrived and with it, the rebellion. Her soulmate didn't say anything, Luda started to think that they didn't know how to write, but the drawings finally came back. Luda did her best not to do anything again, but it was inevitable not to write things down in her hand after a long day of studying.
It didn't seem to irritate the person she was meant for, who took to writing bits and pieces of poetry or songs on her thighs. Luda was punished every week for showing up with inky legs, but she was glad that nothing serious had happened to her soulmate before, and missing them for ten years was enough to forgive them.
Luda knew that they had not died, it was obvious, as she felt something in her chest when it came to her soulmate and had already studied deeply on the subject, which said that when a soulmate died, their half would get into a deep depression for the rest of their lives, even if they didn't know the person. The emptiness in the chest was the so-called pain of a broken heart and the incidence of deaths from it was high.
And then came adulthood.
Lee Luda had barely entered Seoul National University when tattoo marks started to appear on her back. Tattoos were traces of permanent ink on the skin of the person making them and it was mirrored on the skin of their other half, but slightly lighter, as if it was being erased from the skin, only it never came off. Luda didn't care, but her professors did, and she ended up getting more and more angry looks from them.
“Please stop getting tattoos.” Luda had to write on her wrist when she noticed her soulmate's new tattoo. She even wondered what the other person did for a living to have a kiss tattooed on their neck. And if the person was employed, which she knew they couldn't be with such tattoos.
The answer came in the form of three more tattoos on her arm, a very visible place. Luda wrote a series of swear words on her arm and on top of the tattoo, mostly to show how displeased she was. But her soulmate didn't seem to take her seriously and the now-doctor decided to piss the other person off and got a ridiculous butterfly tattoo in a visible place.
That was the only time Luda's soulmate ever wrote something back to her.
“Childish” appeared on her neck during an appointment and Luda had to walk around with it for hours, without even being able to go home to put on a turtleneck shirt. It was on that day that Luda promised that even if her soulmate appeared in front of her, she would not get forgive them in any way. She wanted whoever the other person was to die and be far away from her.
It had been seven years since that. Lee Luda still had tattoo marks on her body, but it didn't bother her anymore, just as it didn't bother her co-workers. She was now an orthopedic specialist, and barely had time to breathe, let alone call about someone's opinion of her skin tattoos or her even called soulmate.
Even though in her chest the desire to be close to her other half ached, she tried not to care. Ignoring it was the best course of action and she was doing it successfully, focusing on her work, study, and taking care of her parents mainly. It was what was her life, her priority. Not someone she didn't know who had made a fool out of her.
“Dr. Lee?” The voice of one of the new orthopedic intern caught her attention and Luda looked up from the article she was trying to read.
She couldn't pretend she was succeeding, not when the article dealt with the subject she'd been trying to ignore for so long. “Soulmates who are not inserted in the same socioeconomic context tend not to live well” was the thesis of the article and Luda quickly closed it, trying to forget that when she looked at Yoon Keeho, as she read on his name tag.
"Something happened?" Luda asked in a low tone, pulling her cell phone out of her pocket to see if she'd missed any messages.
“Yes, Dr. Kim asked me to come to get you urgently, seonsaengnim,” Keeho warned in a worried tone, holding the door as Luda ran through it.
Kim Hyunjung was her best friend and also the general head of the orthopedics department, being one of the main doctors at the hospital in that area. If she called and it was urgent, Luda knew she should get to the woman as quickly as possible. She was just curious as to why the woman hadn't contacted her via cell phone, her favorite type of communication.
Luda went down two floors to enter the orthopedic center, looking around worriedly until she saw an intense rumble in one of the doors, with one of her interns with her hand over her mouth in front of a room. She practically ran towards Im Dayoung, who turned to face her in shock as soon as she saw Hyunjung there.
“Dr. Lee, you're not going to believe what happened…” Dayoung started but was immediately interrupted by the door being slammed open.
“Luda-ah!” Hyunjung's scream caught her attention and immediately Luda ran to her friend's voice, nervous. To her surprise, Hyunjung was the one sitting on the gurney, whimpering and clutching her foot. "I will die!"
Luda rolled her eyes immediately before approaching, a little irritated by the attitude of the other doctor, who had tears in her eyes. She grabbed Hyunjung's foot, who whimpered again.
“Where are you playing football again?” Luda questioned, squeezing the other doctor's foot tighter and making Hyunjung cry, trying to pull her foot back. Luda started to laugh and her friend groaned softly.
“Byulyi forced me!” Hyunjung complained and Luda squeezed her foot hard again. Tired of Hyunjung's whimpering, Luda kicked the other interns out with her hand, sitting up and pulling the other doctor's foot towards her.
“By 'forced me' do you mean she said that her singer friend would be there?” Luda asked, taking off Hyunjung's shoe to examine the other woman's foot. She frowned at the swelling but didn't detect any broken bones at first glance.
With Hyunjung's perpetual silence, the younger woman looked up at her friend, who was looking up with some regret. Luda had known Hyunjung for a long time, she could understand almost everything the other woman thought or felt, even if Kim was a bit eccentric. So she stared at her friend until the other stared back.
“Apparently she… she might have a soulmate?” Hyunjung muttered under her breath and Luda let her foot drop from her grasp. Luda opened her mouth in shock, blinking.
"But… didn't you see the pen marks on her hands the other day?"
"Yea! Except she appeared with a famous actress yesterday and the actress said she was her fiancée.” Hyunjung whimpered, falling back on the bed.
“Did you call me saying it was urgent just to whine about it?” Luda questioned, standing up.
She threw Hyunjung's sock in the other woman's face and searched the attendance room for alcohol, ignoring Hyunjung behind her. Luda really wanted to hurt Hyunjung's foot, but the other woman's look of disappointment was enough.
"I hurt my foot because someone wrote it on my skin during the game and I'm pretty sure it was the actress," Hyunjung revealed in panic and Luda turned to her friend in shock. “I'm sure she already knew something was going to happen because when I noticed it, I got distracted and fell over. Byulyi took me home right after so I didn't have time to question her.”
"And what's the actress's name?"
Luda's question was mostly to understand the whole situation. She came back to Hyunjung's side with a spray for that kind of injury and held her friend's foot tightly, ignoring the other's groans as the spray started to take effect. Hyunjung was a cry baby for someone dealing with worse injuries in her daily life.
"I don't know if I can say this, she's kind of very famous."
“If she is famous then why would she go to a football game with Byulyi of all people?” Luda asked confused, finally finishing spraying Hyunjung. The other woman's foot already looked slightly better.
“Byulyi only dated famous people, most of her classroom in college was made up of idols, please. The girl I thought was my soulmate is also super famous, I think almost everyone who goes to these Byul matches is famous.” Hyunjung pondered, putting the sock back on. She had tears in her eyes still, something that made Luda chuckle softly.
"If these are famous people, then why haven't you invited me to join you yet?" Luda asked her friend which made Hyunjung shrug. Luda punched Hyunjung quickly until her friend had to scream to stop her.
“You would bring shame to me!” Argued the eldest, who had to hold Lee's hands to prevent them from being beaten again. “By the way, do you know what day it is?”
"What day is today?"
Luda thought that Hyunjung was just trying to make her forget what they were talking about, but the department head took her to the lobby, where a man was sitting on one of the benches. That man was known to stalk, every last Friday of the month, the other doctor in charge of the orthopedics section. And it was no surprise that when Dr. Zhang Yixing walked through one of the doors, the man rose to his feet, running with his bad leg towards the doctor. Both Luda and Hyunjung burst out laughing when they saw how Yixing ran as if his life depended on it, as did some other doctors in the sector.
The rest of Luda's day passed without much intervention. She had some routine appointments with former patients and also an emergency surgery, but she managed to get through it all without haste. To her surprise and annoyance, Hyunjung texted her that she would have to stay on duty that night because Dr. Zhang suffered an injury when he fell down the stairs while being chased by the man who hated him.
So there she was, lying in her living room, trying to stay awake. Hyunjung was missing, probably sleeping hidden in a room, and she was the only person Luda actually talked to in the hospital other than her residents. She didn't have much to do, as the orthopedics weren't so busy at this time of night.
Luda was about to turn on her computer to play a match of Valorant when she heard her pager beeping. She sighed softly as she read Dayoung's message and stood up, cracking her back to ward off weariness. Luda knew it wasn't that serious, someone had broken their arm, but even so, she walked quickly to the orthopedics area.
“Dr. Lee!” Her other resident called out to her and Luda approached him, sighing softly at how agitated he looked. "You don't know who broke her arm!" He whispered-shouted and she frowned briefly, before opening the door.
Inside the room were three women, one of them lying on the bed whimpering every few seconds while holding an arm that was awkwardly shaped. Luda stared at her briefly, feeling her stomach churn briefly, unable to understand.
“Good night, Dr. Lee.” The husky voice of one of the standing women caught her attention and Luda nodded briefly.
She approached the woman on the bed and noted the swelling and redness on her arm. Luda shivered for a second at the sight of the woman's arm. Not only because the situation was really ugly, but also because of something else.
The outstretched, broken-looking arm had a large number of tattoos. Tattoos that followed the same pattern as those on Luda's arms.
She swallowed hard and didn't know what to say at that moment. Luda bit her tongue and looked up to stare at the other woman, who had beautiful blue hair and eyes that were wet with tears of pain. Her soul mate. Luda's heart raced mightily at the sight of her, 'cause even though she tried at all costs to deny the bond, it still existed and it was even painful to be this close to the other woman who was her other half.
“Ludi!” Hyunjung's voice caught her attention and Luda shivered, looking away across the room. Her best friend was standing at the door of it and had a rather desperate look in her eyes.
"Hi, eonni, I'll take care of this." Luda smiled briefly, before turning back to her patient. She didn't touch the woman's arm, as she could already see that it was a mildly serious injury. “Good night, how did this happen?”
"She was running downstairs when she landed on her hand." The orange-haired woman from before said and Luda nodded again. “Is it serious, doctor?”
“We won't know until after the x-ray. I will recommend a dose of medicine to relieve the pain but initially, the outlook is bad.” Luda explained, approaching the blue-haired woman's arm. The closeness alone was enough to make her want to sigh like a teenager. “Resident Choi, you know what medicine to give the patient, right?”
"Yes, seonsaengnim. Should I be responsible for taking her for the x-ray?” The young resident questioned her and Luda hummed in agreement. Her gaze met her soul mate's for the first time and Luda saw the exact moment the other woman stared at the tattoo that was mirrored on her neck, the only one actually visible behind her closed lab coat.
The realization hit the patient like a hurricane and Luda didn't want to be there to be questioned about anything. She took the woman's chart and briefly read her name, Nam Dawon, before noting what would be done in the next few moments. Luda left the patient's room almost running, bumping into Hyunjung who was still outside.
The head of orthopedics pulled her by the arm to the front desk, looking excited about something, while all Luda could think about was her soulmate. She looked so angelic that even the tattoos couldn't take it away. Her face was perfect even with the tears wetting it, as was everything about her. Luda almost forgot how her soulmate had been stupid to her one day.
“Fuck, Ludi, do you know who those are?” Hyunjung's voice snapped her out of her thoughts and Luda had to look up at her friend.
"Who?" She asked innocently. She really had no idea who these women were.
“The girl I told you was my soulmate! She’s the one with the orange hair!” Hyunjung exclaimed excitedly, pulling her aside. Luda's eyes widened in sheer shock. "And they're in a famous rock band, Cosmic or something else."
“Eonni,” Luda called out, still in shock. Hyunjung stared back at her and Lee briefly pulled the sleeve of her lab coat to show her arm, where there were tattoos similar to Nam Dawon's. “The one with the blue hair is my soulmate.” She muttered.
Hyunjung was just as shocked as she was, eyes widening comically. But soon the two were interrupted by Im Dayoung, who had a pout on her face and a clipboard with a chart in one arm.
“What happened, Dayoung?” Hyunjung asked worriedly as the resident put the clipboard in front of Luda with some rudeness.
"My girlfriend is less than ten meters away from me and I can't even talk to her properly, goddamn rules!" Dayoung said with a cute aegyo, but that made Hyunjung roll her eyes anyway. The department head patted the other girl on the head who groaned.
Luda sat in front of the computer and picked up the clipboard Dayoung had brought, quickly updating the patient's data on the system. She searched for Nam Dawon's name and realized that her resident had been quick to take her for x-rays as most of the woman's documents were already in the database.
“Nam Dawon…” Luda unconsciously muttered to herself, admiring the way the name sounded on her tongue. She couldn't help but notice what a beautiful name it was, just like the woman herself.
“Is Dawon eonni’s injury serious, seonsaengnim?” Dayoung's voice disturbed her thoughts and Luda looked up at her, frowning.
“Dawon eonni?” She questioned with a note of jealousy.
Luda didn't even know what she was jealous of. She didn't know Dawon and until hours ago she made a point of telling herself that she didn't care about her soulmate. Why did she suddenly feel that feeling of possession over the other woman?
“She is in the same band as my girlfriend Yeonjungie,” Dayoung commented, tapping her short nails against the counter and distracting Luda. "I've known her since I was a teenager."
“Is your girlfriend’s band famous then?” Hyunjung asked curiously and Luda found it funny that the soulmates of the three were together in a single group. How ironic did fate have to be?
“Uh-huh. Yeonjungie barely has time to breathe sometimes, there are too many girls at her feet, it’s horrible!” Dayoung complained, banging her head against the counter. “Dawon eonni must have been injured in one of her fan chases, I have no doubt. Those girls will do anything for a piece of her, even if she's not even an idol.”
“How do you deal with dating a famous person, Dayoungie?” Luda asked quietly, seeing an update pop up on the computer screen. She opened the document and sighed softly at the sight of Dawon's X-ray in front of her.
“I don't even know, seonsaengnim... But it's fun when she buys me expensive gifts and takes me out to fancy dinners!” That made both Hyunjung and Luda laugh out loud. The resident's pager rang and she said goodbye grumbling, while Luda showed Hyunjung the x-ray.
“Surgery will be necessary,” Hyunjung muttered, watching the broken bone. She grimaced as did Luda, both knowing that a pin would also be required. "I'll let you do the surgery, okay?"
Luda nodded with noise in her throat, analyzing the data the radiologist had sent along. Hyunjung took out a post-it and made some notes, something Luda mentally thanked. Lee already knew well enough who was going to help her with the surgery so she just sorted out her papers before getting up, knowing that Resident Choi had already returned with the patient to the room. Luda mustered up all the courage in the world before opening the door to Nam Dawon's room.
“Good night again, Nam Dawon-ssi.” Luda greeted with a nervous voice. She noticed that the patient was lying on the bed with her arm in a sling and that the orange-haired woman was still beside her. "The bruise of yours was serious and there is a break in your arm."
“Will I need surgery?” That was the first sentence Nam Dawon spoke and Luda felt her stomach flutter nervously. The woman's voice was soft and sweet and made her heart flutter immediately.
“Yes, we will put in pins so that the bone is put back in place,” Luda explained, though her voice was still weak from nervousness. “When was the last time you ate something solid?”
"She had dinner with me five hours ago." The orange-haired woman answered for Dawon, who had a fearful look.
“Okay, it's exactly midnight now, so we're having the surgery at three in the morning, right? Eight hours of fasting is enough, but the drugs will continue to be given to reduce the pain.” Luda said calmly, jotting things down in Dawon's chart. "Any questions?"
“Do I really have to have the surgery?” Dawon asked in a soft voice and Luda involuntarily cracked a smile. She looked into the woman's eyes and against all medical ethics, let her hand touch Dawon's good arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.
"It's the only procedure that will get your bone back to as little normality as possible," Luda muttered as if she were talking to a child. The other woman stirred a little at her touch, staring at her steadily. “I'm going to make the surgery, okay? You can trust me that everything will be fine."
Luda's stomach ached at the closeness between the two of them, making her want to take a deep breath. Dawon also seemed to sense that something was up, as she had a soft face and puzzled eyes. Her hand touched Luda's wrist, which she barely noticed when Nam pushed up her sleeve to expose her wrist, where a tattoo was.
"You are my soul mate," Dawon whispered in shock at the similarity between their tattoos and Luda shook her head, pulling her wrist back. She didn't think it was right to talk about it hours before an important procedure.
Even though it hurt her, she knew it would only bring Dawon worries and that was the last thing she wanted. She needed a calm woman to make her surgery go smoothly.
"Resident Choi will accompany you during the night and will be responsible for administering your medicine. See you tomorrow, right after the surgery.” Luda said quickly, pulling away from the other woman. She caught the disappointed look in Dawon's eyes and bit her lip quickly before leaving the room, trying to keep her cool.
It was quite obvious that she needed to keep Dawon calm, but even so, her heart was tight, as she wanted to talk to the woman for hours until she found out all the details of the other's life. Luda sighed softly as she stopped by the orthotics desk, trying to calm her racing heart.
She pressed the counter and left the chart there, glancing at Choi Soobin, the resident in charge of Nam Dawon. The boy was analyzing the woman's X-ray too, taking notes, like a good student.
“Dr. Lee?” He spoke when he noticed her attention and Luda shook her head slightly.
“You will be responsible for taking care of Nam Dawon-ssi for the night, okay? Give her medicine at the right times, just enough so she doesn't feel pain during the night and rest too. You and Resident Im Dayoung will be with me for the surgery, which will be done at three in the morning.” Luda warned the resident and saw his eyes light up at the prospect of being in surgery.
“Right, seonsaengnim! Do you need anything else?" He asked eager to please her and Luda shook her head.
“I'll be in my office if Nam Dawon-ssi's situation gets worse, so don't hesitate to look for me or page me. I will be on the lookout.” She warned him briefly before saying goodbye to the boy.
She took the stairs instead of using the elevator, wanting to breathe some clean air, but was surprised to see the orange-haired woman accompanying Dawon near one of the windows, a cigarette between her fingers.
"Oh, fuck!" The woman exclaimed as soon as she noticed her presence and Luda broke into a small smile, tilting her head towards the cigarette.
“Smoking is prohibited here,” Luda said seriously and the woman gulped, nodding, probably afraid of her serious expression. She stubbed out her cigarette on the wall and tossed it into a nearby trash can, while Luda ignored her and tried to climb the stairs.
"Listen," The woman's voice made her steps stop and Luda sighed softly. "You really are Dawonie's soul mate, aren't you? She was getting more and more nervous about it as soon as she saw this tattoo of your neck."
“I don't think I should say this to you right now, miss…” Luda tried to remember if Hyunjung had already said the woman's name, but it wasn't a problem.
“Sojung. Chu Sojung.” The orange-haired woman spoke calmly and Luda nodded. “Wait…you don't know me? Don't you know us?"
Luda frowned, finally turning to face the other. She raised her eyebrow, trying to familiarize herself with the names Dawon, Yeonjung, or Sojung. She had to admit that she didn't listen to much music, restricted to the one or two girl groups she'd been a fan of in her teens, but overall she'd always enjoyed playing video games more than listening to music.
“Should I?” Luda asked in a confused tone, unconsciously dropping her head to the side.
"Yeah? I mean, there is security at the hospital door now because there are some fans who want to break into the hospital to get updates of Dawon.” Sojung spoke in that obvious tone and Lee just shook her head. "You really don't know her?"
"Why would I lie?" Luda muttered, scratching the back of her neck in embarrassment. She noticed how shocked Sojung looked and sighed. “Look, I have to go get some rest before the surgery, okay? Go calm down Dawon-ssi so she is okay for surgery.”
Lee didn't want to waste any more time on Sojung, knowing she needed at least two hours of sleep to feel good for the surgery at three. She walked past the artist and had no further interruptions until she arrived at her office. She sent a quick message to Hyunjung, updating her on the surgery schedule, and another to Dayoung, telling her to organize the staff for later.
Just then, Luda noticed the drawing of a flower that was in her hand, the very one she had touched Dawon. That made a smile break across her face automatically. She sighed a little and then noticed the phrase written just below the flower.
"First, you are beautiful. second, please have my arm healed soon.”
It made her smile even wider, her stomach churning with the realization that her soulmate was someone cute but also fearful. Luda was a little reluctant, but took a pen and wrote just above the flower, delicately: “you will recover well. I will do my best!”
Luda threw herself back on her couch and, after some reluctance, decided to research Nam Dawon's name just to be sure who she would have to fix her arm (as if it wasn't her soulmate). To her surprise, thousands of results appeared, even a page on Wikipedia.
Now she understood what Sojung meant. Luda briefly read what Wikipedia said about Nam Dawon, discovering that she was born in Seoul as well, that the band with Sojung and Dayoung's girlfriend was really famous, and that she was also a songwriter for dozens of groups in her spare time. Luda clicked on Melon's profile of the three women and wondered if she was being too invasive, but she clicked on one of the songs anyway.
“RIP 2 My Youth” started playing and Luda closed her eyes when she finally heard Dawon's voice sounding like she was in pain. She couldn't deny that the woman sang very well, and the song had an extraordinarily good beat. Luda felt like she was getting to know Dawon in a way through that song, although she was mostly invading Nam's life without even having exchanged words with her directly.
When she opened her eyes again, Luda realized there was another message on her wrist. “I trust you” was what Dawon had written and it made Luda's heart race mightily. She put her phone away after pausing the music and setting an alarm for two hours, lying on the uncomfortable couch, trying to get some rest.
But all that came to mind was a fearful look and bright blue hair. Luda promised herself that she would have the best surgery of her life, taking all the care in the world. Dawon would walk away with a practically new arm if she depended on it and maybe they could talk properly afterward. Like the soulmates they were.
x
The surgery had been a success. Obviously, it was surgery Luda had at least seven times a month, so she was used to it. But she was also happy that everything had gone smoothly and now Nam Dawon was resting in her bed, although she was nervous at the prospect of having to talk to the woman.
It was early in the morning, Luda had just woken up after a long nap. She was glad she hadn't been woken up by anyone, which meant she hadn't had any hospital emergencies yet. It was already seven o'clock in the morning and she searched her closet inside the office for clean clothes before taking a shower in Hyunjung's office bathroom.
Her friend wasn't around and she was already used to Luda's behavior, so she didn't even bother to warn them that she had invaded someone else's office. Luda was on her way to the cafeteria to have her breakfast when she felt a body bump into hers.
“Good morning, seonsaengnim!” Dayoung exclaimed beside her and Luda just gave her a look, too lazy to say anything. The resident had been spectacular in surgery last night, and Luda knew she should talk to her about it, but she'd leave it for the next class.
“Dayoung-ah, is it true that Cosmic’s Dawon is here?” A voice called out near them and Luda looked up at Lee Yeoreum, who nervously bowed as soon as she saw her. “Seonsaengnim, good morning!”
“She broke her arm in a chase from those crazy fans and we did her surgery!” Dayoung gossiped, pulling Luda and Yeoreum to the cafeteria line. A few students younger than the two in front were startled to see Luda there and bowed nervously, while the orthopedist nodded respectfully.
“Is she so pretty in person? And the tattoos, are they real? My God, I need to go get her autograph.” Yeoreum said wide-eyed, squeezing Dayoung's arm and jumping in place. “Lee Luda seonsaeng, can you put me on your service today?!”
Luda, who had been distracted putting her breakfast on, just glanced at the other girl, who quickly flinched. Yeoreum knew that whoever defined orthopedic residents was Hyunjung, not her.
“You don't need to be in orthopedic today, I'm sure Sojung-ssi must be in the cafeteria. Is she not your utt?” Dayoung continued the conversation and despite finding it funny, all Luda wanted before starting the sixteen-hour duty was a little silence.
“Sojung eonni already has a soulmate. I wanted to seduce Dawon-ssi to have the experience of dating someone famous.” Yeoreum said with a pout, sitting down next to Luda.
“What's the point of dating someone famous just for the status of dating them? Will this make you gain followers on SNS?” Luda questioned, somewhat annoyed. After all, it was her soul mate they were talking about so blatantly. "It would be better to date some famous actor, at least their fans wouldn't threaten you with death."
“Seonsaengnim!” Dayoung exclaimed but started laughing right away. She exchanged a knowing look with Luda, who knew well what she was thinking. Lee just hoped Dayoung didn't have to deal with that either.
Yeoreum seemed to consider her words, but she was still only a little older than Dayoung, so Luda knew she wouldn't take her advice seriously. The rest of breakfast passed without a hitch and soon Luda, accompanied by Choi Soobin, had to go on her morning round.
When Dr. Zhang Yixing was on sick leave, she ended up staying with his patients. Soobin, knowing how demanding work with Luda was, arranged the order of patients from most complicated to least complicated, the first ones always being the worst to deal with. She'd read the charts for each of them a bit after Nam Dawon's surgery, but she needed to look at them to get her bearings.
Luda was on the third patient of the morning when a group of residents approached. She remembered that day was a weekly change day, so she greeted them one by one before heading back to her work. They would track people's injuries in person and then go into theory, she decided.
Nam Dawon was at the bottom of the most complicated list as her case was average. Even so, Luda did her best not to let her emotions show as she opened the door to the rock star's bedroom.
The sigh was inevitable. She bit her lip immediately as soon as she felt it come out of her mouth because Nam Dawon wasn't wearing her hospital clothes she was sitting on the bed in gym shorts and a training top, exposing her perfect abs and the tattoos that Luda also had it in her body. Nam Dawon was already naturally beautiful, but her body drew even more attention.
“G-good morning, Nam Dawon-ssi.” Luda stuttered, feeling stupid for doing so. As soon as their eyes met, Dawon's immediately sparkled. Luda felt her throat tighten at the sight of it.
“Good morning, Dr. Lee!” Dawon exclaimed hoarsely and still sounding slightly groggy. The postoperative period was going well if she was awake.
Luda approached until she noticed the sling that was on her arm, one of the Iron Man that Sojung had brought as a mockery. Dawon didn't seem bothered by the proximity, her free hand resting on the mattress to make room for Luda. The doctor touched the arm with the sling and placed it in the correct position, noting that the dose of medicine was still going into the vein in Dawon's other arm and letting her fingers gently touch where it was purple, just above an anime tattoo.
"Are you better?" Luda asked in a low tone, her eyes worried by the redness on the other woman's arm. She stroked there for a few more seconds until she heard a sigh.
“I'm hungry, but I woke up after the first breakfast. Eonni has gone to get me something to eat, but I feel no pain, thanks to the medicine.” Dawon explained calmly and Luda nodded. She pulled the other woman's hand slightly away and just felt it when Dawon pulled her hand and intertwined it with hers.
Luda felt her face flush, knowing she'd promised to have the conversation with Dawon, but couldn't in front of her residents. She suddenly remembered them and blushed even more. They were in such perpetual silence that Luda knew they were listening to every little breath that left their lips.
“Later,” Luda whispered, but her voice barely sounded in the silent room. But Dawon understood what she meant, sighing and dropping her hand. Luda's heart ached a little, but she pulled away anyway.
Her residents were coming after she and Luda didn't dare look at them a second time, knowing she had gone against the protocol of attending with Dawon. She tried to ignore it and continued to see patients, this time asking her residents questions. They still looked at her suspiciously, wanting to understand her relationship with Nam Dawon, but they didn't ask questions.
She later gave them a brief class before indicating what they had to do for the day, leaving Choi Soobin to take care of Dawon. The boy and Dayoung had seen Luda and Dawon side by side, as well as the rest of the staff. They knew more than Luda could tell and she didn't want to leave someone else on the job.
Finally, it was time to actually talk to Dawon.
Luda sighed softly to herself in the empty elevator. She couldn't avoid the encounter forever, but she also didn't know what they were going to do. They were soulmates, obviously, but from there, what would they be? She felt a little sweaty and breathed a sigh of relief as the elevator stopped in the orthopedics section.
Walking to Dawon's bedroom door was even harder than it had been in the morning and Luda gulped and stopped as soon as she got there. She ran a hand over her neck, closing her eyes for a second before knocking on the door. The low sound of a “come in” was the permission she got and Luda wasn't surprised to see Sojung by Dawon's bedside.
“You really came!” Dawon exclaimed with bright eyes and Luda flashed a small, shy smile before closing the door.
"I told you I would come." She muttered, approaching the blue-haired woman's bed.
"You didn't answer me and I thought you were ignoring me," Dawon said, scratching her neck quickly. Luda frowned, before tugging at the sleeve of her lab coat. "Uh, it was in the belly..." Dawon muttered shyly and that made Luda blush.
She didn't lift her shirt to check what Dawon had written and only then did she realize the woman was dressed in sweatpants and a band t-shirt. Luda sighed softly, breaking into a smile unconsciously. Dawon was beautiful, somehow different from all the people she had seen before in her entire life.
"I'll let you two keep dating." The orange-haired woman, Sojung, said getting up, and Luda blushed when she noticed she forgot Sojung was there. "I'm warning you that I don't want nephews now!" She scoffed and the two others immediately rolled their eyes.
As soon as Sojung left, silence took over the room. The two wanted to say something, but they seemed so nervous that the words wouldn't come out. Luda had never felt like this in her life, as she had always been a person who voiced her opinions with assertiveness. She just couldn't even look up to her soulmate.
"I really didn't expect to meet you yesterday." Luda started, scratching the back of her head. She knew her voice sounded shaky and anxious, the way she really didn't want to.
“Sojung eonni told me that you had never heard of the band before. I don't know whether to feel good or offended by it.” Dawon teased softly, extending her good hand to Luda, who took it. She sat on the bed next to the woman who was barely out of surgery, but neither of them made a point of letting go of their intertwined hands.
“I heard some songs from you guys yesterday.” The young doctor confessed under her breath, playing with Nam's hand. “The first album you guys released is really really good. It's not something I hear often, but I really enjoyed it.”
"I don't know how I feel about it either." Dawon scoffed and in her face, Luda could see the sadness and hesitation. "I don't think I'm capable of saying what I felt at that time, because you, more than anyone, bear the marks of what my confusion was."
Dawon gently slipped her fingers inside Luda's lab coat, and Luda sighed at the feel of the tattoos on her skin. Luda would never forget Dawon's reaction to the stupid tattoo she'd gotten in retaliation against the blue-haired woman.
"We were young, there's no way to demand maturity from someone who wasn't even close to having it." Luda soothed the other, her hand making contact with hers immediately. Dawon flashed a small, guilty smile.
“Still, excuse me, Lee Luda-ssi,” Nam whispered. Luda could really see that she really meant it and how sorry she was. It made her heart melt a little and she couldn't help but lean towards the other, hugging her.
Dawon sighed softly against her neck and Luda's heart nearly leaped out of her chest with happiness. She had never felt like this before as if she was finally complete. Now she knew that what people said wasn't a lie because even though she didn't have any romantic feelings towards Dawon, just being by her side made her happier than anything else in her life.
"Everything is fine now," Luda muttered low, her hand stroking Dawon's back gently.
“What do we do next?” Dawon asked quietly, pulling away slowly and connecting their hands. Luda looked at her and shrugged, a little nervous about that too. “I… do you want to go on a date?”
Luda felt her heart leap in her chest and she bit her lower lip. Dawon looked as nervous as she was, both of them fearful at the prospect of what that question would change in their lives.
"I think so. That's what soulmates do, isn't it?” Luda asked herself, lowering her head a little and looking at their clasped hands. She wanted to know more about Dawon, but she wondered if they could get to know each other well when the other woman was so famous.
“Just because we're soulmates doesn't mean we have to skip all the phases of normal dating, Dr. Lee,” Dawon spoke respectfully, looking embarrassed.
"You can call me Luda, we're only a few months apart in age," Luda spoke up, feeling Dawon's hand come up to grab her elbow. "When you get out of here, then we can go on a date as the normal people do."
The mocking tone at the end of the sentence made Dawon chuckle and Luda was ready to continue the conversation when she felt her cell phone vibrating in her pocket. She quickly pulled it out and saw that it was a message from Hyunjung. Sighing, Luda rose from the bed and flashed a smile at Dawon.
“Do you have to go already?” Dawon asked in a low tone and Luda nodded, her hand stroking the blue-haired woman's shoulder.
“Work calls me. I will try to come here later before I leave my duty.” Luda warned and Dawon nodded. Still holding her cell phone in her hand, Luda handed it to the other woman, feeling braver than ever. "Give me your number."
Her bossy tone seemed to surprise Dawon, but she put the number on Luda's cell anyway. The doctor said goodbye with a quick wave before running off to meet Hyunjung, but her mind could only focus on the smoothness of Dawon's skin.
x
Luda spent the rest of the day terribly busy. With Yixing gone, she and Hyunjung had to split in two to deal with his residents and his patients. She was barely able to stop for lunch during that time, having to eat a natural sandwich that Dayoung brought her after an appointment.
What made her day a little better were the messages Dawon was leaving on her cell phone. The woman seemed determined not to waste any more time on Luda and tried to maintain as much contact as possible, even though the doctor barely had time to answer her. She didn't mind the delay in responses, looking more and more excited every time Luda could write her some nonsense.
In fact, her day had been bad, but not that bad. Luda was ready to go home and finally get some real rest when Dawon texted her, asking if she wanted to take a little walk around the hospital garden. Even with all the fatigue and the desire to sleep supported anywhere possible, Luda accepted.
"You look extremely tired," Dawon commented in a low tone as the two walked through the gardens. Luda nodded, yawning a little.
"I'm on the forty-eight hour in duty already, it's normal to feel tired." Luda soothed her, her hand automatically reaching out for Dawon's. The rock star let her lean on her good arm, before guiding her to a bench next to a tree.
“Do you always have such long duties?” Dawon asked innocently, her hand squeezing Luda's knee so she leaned against her shoulder.
“No, no, it's because my colleague who is also head of the orthopedics sector had an unforeseen event yesterday. I usually only work during the day and during the week.” Luda muttered, her hand playing softly with Dawon's. “I think it was really fate that made us meet yesterday.”
“Sojung eonni always talk about fate. She was the first person to explain to me what soulmates were and she always seemed to believe more than I did that I would meet you one day.” Dawon replied, in that same low tone. Luda frowned, wondering why the other woman's family had never explained anything to her.
“Did you not believe?”
“No one had ever explained that to me. I used to draw a lot on the arms, but then you answered me once and my dad saw it. He thought it was the devil's work, he never believed in soulmates, and he beat me up, saying I shouldn't draw on my arms ever again. And I didn't, afraid of what would happen to me if I did." Dawon explained in a low, pained tone.
Luda swallowed, her hand gripping Dawon's tightly. She felt tears welling up in her eyes and pulled away a little, coming face to face with the other woman, who also had tears in her eyes. The two faced each other and the pain was visible in their eyes. Luda leaned over and hugged Dawon tightly, avoiding Dawon's newly operated arm, but still keeping her point and trying to bring comfort to her.
Only Dawon's words carried immense pain, something Luda was not able to feel directly, but she could see that the woman had been through a lot. And the tightness in her chest only increased upon hearing Dawon's words, as she knew that she undeniably still felt pain from what had happened before.
"It's okay now, he won't hurt you anymore," Luda muttered, her voice breaking. Luda felt her heartache with all the pain that was visible in Dawon.
“That's why I got the tattoos as soon as I left home. I wanted to feel that at least my body still belonged to me. So you answered me about them and I was too silly to take you seriously.” Dawon continued in a low tone, laughing without humor. “I regret doing this to your body too, Luda-ssi.”
Luda never thought that someone else's words would hurt her as much as Dawon's did. Her chest was burning and she felt her stomach sink with every word that came out of the blue-haired woman's mouth. She had never imagined all that had happened to Dawon because they had never really communicated.
Luda just wanted to be able to take away all the pain the other woman felt, wanted to be able to make her feel safe. So her hug got even tighter. Dawon leaned her head on top of hers and breathed heavily.
"Everything is fine," Luda repeated the words, even though she felt they were very empty. Dawon sighed softly and with her good hand, stroked Luda's hair, who noticed that she was crying a little.
“Sorry for throwing that at you. We've only known each other for a few hours and I feel like I've known you for years.” Dawon said, her tone terribly regretful. Luda sighed and turned away from her.
"We are soul mates. What is your problem is also mine.” Luda spoke assertively. “Even if I thought that when I got to meet you, I would scold you for giving me these tattoos without permission, I can't do it.” She chuckled softly, thinking how silly she was.
"If you swore at me, you wouldn't be wrong," Dawon said with a small smile. Luda rolled her eyes, realizing that the mood was already much lighter.
"I'm sure as a rock star, you already have enough haters." The doctor commented, making Dawon laugh.
“I can always send you the link to the haters' fanbases. But you need to keep the hate kinda low, Sojung eonni once tried to sign up for one and got kicked out.” Dawon told it like it was a secret and that made Luda laugh. "Really! Another time, she tried to join her own fanbase, but broke the rules and was also kicked out.”
“And the fans know they kicked her out?”
“They know cause she told SNS afterward, so fans campaigned for her to come back… as long as she followed the rules,” Dawon explained and Luda had to lean on her to stop laughing.
The two continued to talk for a few more minutes, not noticing the time passing. The exchange of experiences between them was making Luda feel happier every second. Dawon was shy but had quickly opened up to her, just as Luda was also telling her about her life stuff. It was only when Hyunjung texted Luda that she realized she had to go home and rest.
Dawon complained softly, something that made her smile softly, but Luda took her to the elevator anyway. Nam had promised that Sojung would meet her at the orthopedic department, so the doctor tried not to worry too much. She went to her car and drove home, stopping by a diner near her house to buy something to eat.
Getting home took longer than she thought it would. Luda considered turning on her computer to play something as her apartment was very lonely, but then she realized that Dawon had texted her. Her heart raced and she replied to her soulmate, letting her know that she was already home, while Dawon responded with an image of Sojung playing on the cell phone next to her.
Luda didn't think she could feel so enchanted by someone she had just met, but she also couldn't contain her smile with every message Dawon sent. The two didn't have much in common, but somehow they were making it all work, each sharing their experiences in life. Subject, at least, was not lacking.
Talking to the rockstar was too easy and Luda couldn't stop doing it. She almost forgot to eat, but Nam reminded her of that when she complained that she couldn't eat anything solid. Luda simply realized that when it came to Nam Dawon, forgetting about the rest of the world was very easy. And it wasn't something she imagined would happen when she met her soulmate, but it was happening.
It was inevitable.
Nam Dawon was inevitable.