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Windwail Highlands was perhaps the quietest area of Mondstadt at night. As the wind abated and the sun set, the inhabitants of Springvale's tiny houses locked their doors, the hilichurls went to camps to divide the day's booty, and animals and other creatures retired to their burrows. However, life did not stop; every now and then lizards and other small animals ran somewhere, preferring the silence of the night to the hustle and bustle of the day, the gentle rustle of leaves alternated with the calls of night birds, and fireflies hovered low above the grass. The roads were empty, except for the occasional merchant with carts, and nothing could distract the casual wanderer from enjoying the views of untouched nature.
Diluc certainly could not explain to Charles what he needed in the middle of the night in the — to be fair, his own — tavern if asked, but, silently stepping along the path, he decided that he would figure it out on the spot. After all, everyone knew about his strict adherence to all possible rules and strict control. ‘I just came to check the balance and understand which of the goods need to be replenished urgently.’ Yes, something like that would work.
Or, ‘Just making sure none of the patrons trashed the tavern by overdoing it with wine.’
At the thought of this, Diluc frowned and involuntarily quickened his pace. The faster he'd get to the tavern, the less chance of finding it in the ruins. Unless, of course, the expected guest really came there and didn't arrange a tour of hotter spots. Turning at Springvale onto the main road, Diluc glanced at the city in the distance. Seeing no columns of smoke nor panicked residents leaving Mondstadt, he exhaled. It looked like everything had been within limits so far.
It wasn't that Diluc was sure his tavern was in danger that evening. Rather, he was not sure that the result of an increasingly strained relationship with his brother would not be a fracas, simply because Kaeya still could not find something in himself — was it courage or sanity was unknown for sure even to Kaeya himself — to finally talk like normal people and not make a scene. Perhaps it was influenced by... a somewhat unsuccessful conversation experience in the past — but now the situation was different. Coming with sudden revelations at a time when both of them were not in the most stable state was not the same as trying to figure out what was going on between them in general, when both of them (Diluc sincerely hoped so) had already cooled down.
Getting closer to the "Angel's Share" he heard voices and music; apparently, he was not mistaken after all. At the door, Diluc paused for a moment, putting his hand on the handle to take a breath.
‘Well, and why are you nervous?
‘What is the worst thing that can happen? Chandelier collapse?
‘And what if he actually wants to talk?’
With an annoyed twitch of an eyebrow, Diluc slowly opened the door. Sounds, smells and warmth hit him like a wave, and the first thing he saw was a familiar back, shaking with laughter. There were not many people in the tavern, but there were enough of them for a deafening rumble that did not stop for a second. José played some perky melody. Diluc glanced at the visitors, stopping on to Rosaria, who was sitting at the table with a despondent look. Ignoring his not noticing him — on purpose? — brother, Diluc moved towards Rosaria, nodding to Charles, who waved happily at him.
‘I see you're in a rush here,’ Diluc said, sitting down. Hearing a strained loud laugh from the bar counter, he grimaced slightly.
‘Yes, and I think you know the reason.’
‘Honestly, I was afraid that I would come to a conflagration,’ he smiled, removing his gloves.
‘It's late. Klee should be sleeping by now.’
Smiling slightly wider, Diluc involuntarily glanced in the direction of Kaeya. He enthusiastically told something to the guest sitting next to him, as if trying to be as loud as possible and gesticulating so actively that Charles was nervously monitoring the glasses and bottles, as if thinking whether to remove them right away or risk it.
‘Is everything fine?’
Rosaria took a sip from her glass, considering her answer.
‘For now, yes. But a little more, and it can become… sad?’
Diluc's eyes widened in surprise at the questioning intonation. He looked back at his brother.
Rosaria continued. ‘He's been here since sunset. He met me on the street with a bag of crystalflies and a pile of gifts from the Order and dragged me here. He was like, drowning in wine alone is sad, but in the end he left me in about an hour. The rest you can see yourself.’
Rosaria looked calm, but something betrayed melancholy in her. Perhaps it was the slow movements of the hand over a glass of wine — apparently, the first and only one that evening.
The sound of breaking glass made her turn around. Kaeya apologised to Charles, slurring his tongue, promising to buy a new glass, no, ten, and in general, he treats everyone, it's his birthday, everyone should have fun, everyone has wine at his expense. Diluc sighed and looked away. Indeed, a little more, and the mock fun will end.
‘Ah! Brother.’
Diluc raised his head, hearing the word for the first time in a long while. Perhaps he should have rejoiced, but the caustic tone with which the word was spoken did not allow it. With an uneven gait, Kaeya approached the table, an obviously strained smile shining on his face, and Diluc looked away again.
‘What? Ah, I see, you can't bear being witness to your relative dishonouring himself? An all-consuming sense of shame? Unbearable, isn't it?’ Kaeya laughed, but without a hint of amusement in his voice.
‘What exactly led you to this conclusion?’ Diluc stared at him, looking straight into his eyes. There was a long pause.
Kaeya glanced down at the full glass in his hand and downed it in one gulp. Putting his glass down on the table with a clatter, he sat down next to Rosaria.
‘What do you mean? After all, I violate the image with my existence. I am in the community you despise, destroying your stocks of wine, rowdy and suchlike. Or are you pretending that we are not connected in any way, in the hope that people do not know?’
Diluc's fingers twitched slightly, as if from a needle prick.
‘If someone asked, I would not hide anything. But it's not like my family tree is of much interest to anyone.’
Kaeya burst into his half-dead laugh again.
‘And what about the endless admirers? Does it upset you that they, in an attempt to find out as much as possible about the magnificent Uncrowned King, find that his little brother is such a disgrace?’
‘No.’
Kaeya glared gloomily at Diluc's eyes.
‘And I never said you were a disgrace.’ The cold eyes were not hard to bear. ‘Moreover, I don't think so.’
Kaeya chuckled and shrugged. Surely he was not convinced.
‘I'll go, perhaps,’ Rosaria said after a few seconds of awkward silence, standing up. None of the brothers tried to stop her, only Diluc silently nodded, communicating a goodbye. Kaeya looked dejectedly at the glass that was left half full, and then slowly pulled it towards himself.
The voices all around subsided, as if without Kaeya pestering everyone, the guests did not see the point in saying something, and the only sounds were music and periodic sighs of the surrounding people. It didn't look like even the free wine — perhaps Diluc should have resisted wasting his brother's budget on alcohol for strangers — had saved the guests from the cold that stank from the brothers' table.
Silently sipping wine, Kaeya looked somewhere at the surface of the table, abruptly losing all feigned joy.
‘I was told you were seen at the winery today,’ Diluc said casually.
‘I was collecting crystalflies,’ Kaeya muttered without looking up.
Diluc sighed and propped his head on his palm.
‘How much exactly did you drink?’
Kaeya waved his hand, shaking the glass from side to side with the other, watching the wine roll over the sides. His shoulders were slumped; he was clearly uncomfortable.
‘Can you get to the dormitory on your own at all?’
Diluc watched intently as Kaeya's eyes widened for a second, and he seemed to want to look back, but only shrugged, not daring to take his eyes off the glass. Diluc continued with a sigh. ‘I'm not entirely sure they'll let you in like that.’
‘You sound like you're worried,’ Kaeya snorted. There was a pause again. Diluc parted his lips, about to answer, but hesitated. ‘That's what I'm talking about.’
The coldness with which this was said burned something inside Diluc.
‘I am worried.’
It would have been both very simple and incredibly difficult to say, and Diluc chose not to say anything. Kaeya wouldn't have believed it anyway, at least not now.
‘Charles, be a sweetheart, please bring another bottle,’ Kaeya murmured, turning towards the bartender.
‘I don't think you should have more — ’
‘I didn't ask,’ Kaeya snapped at his brother's cautious remark. Diluc sighed — how many more times today would he do it?
They spent some more time like this; Kaeya silently got drunk to the point of stupor, and Diluc just as silently looked either at him or at his own hand on the table. People gradually left the tavern, dispersing to their homes, and soon even the bard left. Charles looked helplessly at Diluc, who nodded, letting the bartender go home. When they were alone, in silence, the awkwardness of the hush seemed to soften, as the contrast between, albeit wordless, life around and the silent tension at the table disappeared.
When Kaeya put his head down on his arms folded on the table, Diluc glanced at the clock on the wall. It would be a foolish idea to take Kaeya to the dorm at two in the morning in such a state — but how much more foolish would it be to take him to the winery? In the morning there would have been an awkward conversation with far-fetched explanations of why Diluc dragged him there at all, but this could be thought about tomorrow.
After all, ‘I am worried,’ was not a lie, and perhaps would find a place in their dialogue later.
When Diluc grabbed Kaeya by the arms, throwing one of them over his shoulder, he expected a protest — but either Kaeya was not able to or did not quite understand what was happening, so he only clung closer, transferring the weight to his brother.
‘Careful.’ Walking around one of the tables, Diluc slowed down, allowing Kaeya to take a few unhurried, unsteady steps himself. After so much time, it was strange to feel any contact between them other than the clash of fists or weapons. There was something in the way Kaeya, almost stumbling, grabbed Diluc's coat with his free hand; something reminiscent of the old days; something warm. Something forgotten.
The fresh air crashed down on them both, causing Kaeya to flinch and raise his head, looking around. His gaze lingered on Diluc, but Kaeya, without saying anything, lowered his head again, as if giving permission for everything that would happen next. Maybe he was expecting some vileness, that Diluc would take him to Jean and say something like, ‘Here, look, it's your captain, can this person bear any responsibility for the safety of Mondstadt?’
The seven, what a fool he was.
The road was painfully slow, but at least without incidents except for the moment when Kaeya became sick and barely audibly asked to stop so he could breathe. Diluc obediently stepped back, supporting his brother by the arm. He kept waiting for Kaeya to start to resent, but the moment never came.
Approaching the winery, Diluc involuntarily looked around, and, indeed, did not notice a single crystalfly in the area. Whether crystalflies were an excuse for visiting the Dawn Winery on his birthday, Diluc didn't know and tried not to think about it. Perhaps Kaeya wanted to say something to him or was waiting for congratulations — there was no point in guessing.
Opening the door, Diluc led Kaeya into the foyer and turned to look at him when he twitched, afraid that he had felt sick again — but Kaeya was staring past him, his lips parted in surprise. Diluc, following his gaze, turned his head. The vase. Even if Kaeya had some comments, he decided to keep them to himself.
The way up the stairs was, perhaps, even longer than the road from the tavern to the winery. Kaeya kept stumbling and stopping, grabbing the railing, but after Diluc, on the intermediate platform, sighed, sat down with his back to his brother, calling with a gesture to grab onto his shoulders and ride upstairs on his back, Kaeya jerked and, holding on to the railing, flew up the stairs to the second floor. On the last step he stumbled again and, cursing, fell to his knees.
‘Are you okay?’ Diluc asked, grabbing him by the arm and lifting him up.
‘I don’t need your help,’ Kaeya tried to break free, but when he was released, he staggered and reflexively grabbed Diluc's shoulder. Looking from under his brows, Kaeya hissed, ‘Fine.’
Taking Kaeya to the guest bedroom, Diluc carefully seated him on the bed and unfastened his coat with awkward movements. Kaeya languidly waved his hands, driving him away, to which Diluc only sighed lightly.
‘Can you calm down, please?’
Kaeya answered the tortured, pained question with silence and lowered his hands. Diluc pulled off his boots and stood up. Kaeya collapsed wearily on the bed, leaving his feet hanging above the floor, and closed his eyes. After waiting for half a minute, Diluc threw his brother's legs on the bed and covered him with a blanket. When that didn't elicit any reaction, Diluc waited another minute before quietly saying, ‘You know, one day we'll have to talk.’
Silence answered him, and he dared to continue. ‘The way you are sure that I don't care honestly hurts. I would like you to know this. I really worry that one day you will drown in everything that gnaws at you, and I do not only mean wine.’
It was hard to speak, but looking at the peaceful face of the — sleeping, as he hoped — Kaeya, Diluc was able to find the strength to express his thoughts aloud, even if they had no listener. Closing his eyes and counting to ten, Diluc took a small bundle from the inner pocket of his coat and placed it on an unoccupied pillow.
‘You still have a family,’ he almost whispered before turning around and heading out of the room.
‘I missed you,’ came a low voice from behind, and Diluc turned around in surprise, thinking that he had heard wrong.
Maybe, indeed, in the silence of the night it was a figment of the imagination, for the face and posture of Kaeya did not change at all. However, it was more pleasant to think otherwise.
‘Happy past birthday,’ Diluc said, quietly closing the door as he left.