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The faint beeping sound of the monitor tracking the pace of her heartbeat served as steady background noise to keep her distracted from the burning feeling all over her arms and legs. Obviously, the thought of leaving the “Upside Down”, as the boys called it, completely unharmed was purely utopic. The impending feeling of doom that Robin had been guessing before they decided to embark on a suicide mission to finish this Vecna slash Henry slash One guy ended up becoming true once they decided to split up into groups. Of course, it had all gone wrong, they should’ve been expecting it.
Still, here laid Robin, in a hospital bed, unsure of how the gang had even managed to pull this off since they were still rescuing survivors from the quakes by the ruckus outside the room. She’d been put away with an IV inside a room that seemed more like a storage unit than anything else, but it’s not like the girl had any reason to complain. At least she was being treated. Eddie didn’t get to have that chance. Oh, Eddie. She felt a sob get caught in her throat upon recalling the moment she saw Dustin’s face when they all came back. They had left him there, the boy had realised that he had been too heavy to carry through the gate. God, it broke her.
This was why they shouldn’t have split into groups. Even if they had needed a distraction. Because everything had gone so well on their part and everyone else was left on their own. Max was almost caught- Robin hadn’t heard anything since she was brought to the hospital. Steve reassured her that she was going to be alright, but she wasn’t so sure of that. Damn it, Max.
She remembered both Steve, her and Nancy hitting Vecna with everything they had, flambe style. It was as if the adrenaline in her body had run out the second the guy practically disintegrated under Nancy firing that shotgun like the total badass she is.
Robin guiltily disregarded her thoughts about Nancy the second they came up. With a huff, she closes her eyes yet again, trying to recall the rest that had happened.
Ripping her apart.
The wet squelching of fucking.. Tentacles would’ve made her so nauseous if they weren’t responsible for almost choking her to death.
Opening her eyes for confirmation of what had happened led Robin to look at her nails, coated with blood and grime from trying to claw her way into freedom, to no avail. Steve and Nancy tried to save her as she yelled for them with what was seemingly the last of her breath. Feeling herself get lightheaded again, Robin shifted in the makeshift hospital bed, steadying herself back in reality.
At least that explained the burns in her arms and legs. The girl looked at the monitor to her left. The beeping was steady, enough that it was starting to be annoying to her ears. The guilt of lying on a bed after barely being hurt in comparison to some of the others was starting to be close to unbearable. With a huff, Robin sat up and reached for the IV tube sticking out of her arm. Closing her hand around it, she yanked the cord out with a pained hiss. Immediately, she felt lightheaded, but she wouldn’t let that stop her.
The stupid, stupid beeping hadn’t stopped. There were still some other wires stuck to her chest and as she made a move to rip them out as well, the door opened to reveal a worried-looking Steve Harrington.
“Steve.” Robin sighed, a smile creeping up on her lips upon seeing her best friend. Never, in a million years, did she think she’d ever been so happy to see Harrington. “Steve, how’s-”
“We’re all going to be okay.” He hummed, making his way to her before pulling a chair to sit beside her. “How about you? How are you feeling?”
There wasn’t much she could tell him. Although being on the verge of passing out after leaving that place probably didn’t give away the best impression that she was doing well.
“Steeeve.” Robin grumbled, not feeling up to hearing him worry like a mother hen. He could save that for the six little nuggets he kept around him at all times. “Help me out of here. Hospital bills are expensive as hell, dingus.”
He had the fucking audacity to laugh at her misery. “Humour’s still intact,” Steve repeated mockingly what she’d said to him when he was bitten by all those bats that most definitely had rabies. It made Robin exaggeratedly roll her eyes.
“I’m serious. My mum can’t afford this- Hell, she wouldn’t even know what it’s for, but she’s going to be pissed when she looks at the bill at the end of the month-”
“Rob.” Steve quickly shut down her mindless rambling. “Hawkins believes this was just an earthquake. By the laws of Indiana, that means you don’t have to worry about any of that.”
“Oh. Fuck. An earthquake? That’s the best they’ve got?” Robin frowned. Of course, she was relieved that free support had been provided for her, but still, the government could make up something that was more plausible, no? At the very least they’d gotten the terrifying part right, even though Robin was sure that the Upside Down and its inhabitants had made its way up her list of greatest fears, winning first prize above rabies and earthquakes.
Probably that was just her overlooking the situation. Just last summer, she’d been clueless about all the weird shit that happened in Hawkins, too. Ignorance is bliss, she supposes.
“Pretty much.” Steve chuckles. The bandages around his wrists and his neck, that had meant that he’d also been taken care of by whatever medics had been wandering around the scene. That was good. Maybe he wouldn’t die of rabies just yet.
Steve’s visit had resulted in them engaging in a lighthearted conversation, with him telling her all about the people of Hawkins that had gotten together and donated supplies to help out the victims of the epicentre of Vecna’s gate.
She should be out there, with everyone, helping out however she could. Before she could say any of that to Steve, however, he was gently inserting the IV into her arm again. Robin cringed at the strange sensation.
“Just focus on resting, okay? Trust me, these people are going to need help for a while. You can afford to lay down right now.”
God, she didn’t deserve a friend like Steve. Amid everything that had happened, he was still working on holding up the group together.
“How are you holding up, Harrington?” Robin muttered, almost seeming afraid to ask. Still, it couldn’t be healthy for him to keep it all inside himself and not tell anyone that he wasn’t at least a tiny bit worried about what this meant for all of them now.
“Not good, Rob.” He let out a self-deprecating chuckle that absolutely broke Robin’s heart.
“Get in here.” The girl hummed, patting the spot next to her on the bed, and Steve couldn’t find it in him to protest. He sat down by her side and she rested her head on his shoulder. Soon enough his head was on top of hers. There was nothing else that needed to be said between them, silent comfort now given through the small gesture.
“You know how I said we wouldn’t make it out of there alive?” Robin started talking after a few moments of silence. The stupid, steady beeping was just a reminder of how they’d made it out when Eddie hadn’t. She felt so, so selfish for hearing the monitor, mocking their now dead friend.
“...Yeah?”
“Are we sure it was worth it?” She hesitated. “I… I mean.. He’s gone, but we didn’t stop anything from happening.” Admitting failure was something that Robin was used to. Still, it never got better. Especially now that the dimension of her problems had transcended from being Hawkin’s freak to the entirety of the city having been destroyed on their account. Fuck.
“Don’t you dare say that you hear me?” Steve frowned, inching away from her so that he could look at her face. Robin intentionally averted her eyes and decided to focus on her bloodied nails. Still, he continued. “He didn’t win. We’ve still got Max right here with us.”
God, Max. How could they be sure that she’d ever be okay after all that? Robin had only caught a glimpse at the girl when Lucas and Erica rushed out of Henry’s old house when it started to crumble apart, but she looked absolutely terrible. Lucas had been crying out for help, desolate and unsure of what to do when everything around him reminded him of a total inferno. Robin couldn’t even begin to imagine how he must’ve felt.
Upon noticing her grimace, Steve put his hand on top of hers. “She’ll be okay. You’ll see.”
Robin wanted to believe him. And, at this point, she trusted Steve so much that she found herself nodding and dropping the subject altogether.
The door slammed open so quickly that it made both of them flinch. Nancy Wheeler stomped inside the room. Both her and Steve had changed into clothes that were far more socially acceptable than the battle gear they wore when fighting Vecna. Robin hadn’t quite gotten a chance to do that just yet, even though she was sure she’d get attached to the cargo pants she wore.
Nancy looked like an absolute hot mess. Brows furrowed in concentration and sleeves rolled up as she wore a simple white button up and jeans, not quite bothering to dress fancy like she usually did. Not even a few bracelets to adorn her look. Robin couldn’t stop herself from assessing the girl. Until.. Well, Steve inherently moved away upon noticing the way Nancy shot the two a doubting look.
“Sorry. I, uh… Came to check on you, Robin, but if you’re busy I can come back another time-” Wheeler muttered, an awkward laugh leaving her lips.
Robin couldn’t blame her for interpreting it all wrong. The “Platonic Friends with a capital P” narrative wouldn’t make that much sense if she didn’t know that Robin would, under no circumstances, like Steve Harrington. Unfortunately for her, barely escaping Vecna didn’t invalidate the fact that if Nancy Wheeler ever found out about her, she’d most definitely react just as Robin would expect her to.
Steve was a surprise to her. Never, ever in a million years would she have expected Harrington, who used to be friends with assholes that bullied and pushed around guys who were outed at school, to keep her secret. But that day, despite the Russian truth serum already having been out of her system, Robin took a leap of faith.
She couldn’t risk her luck by doing the same thing twice. Steve had vowed to keep her secret, and Robin very much intended to keep it that way.
So she smiled awkwardly and tried once again to convince Nancy that there really was nothing between them. Steve decided to leave the room so that they could talk and Robin really wished he hadn’t because she just couldn’t stop rambling and, soon enough, she’d end up blurting something really stupid.
“-so that’s exactly why we’d never really work as a couple, I mean. We both have completely different types, you know? And, honestly, I see him more as a brother than anything. You know how he’s practically the kid’s mum? Like, I’m more fit to fulfill the aunt role-”
God, what the fuck was she going on about. Robin cringed, noticing the grimace on Nancy’s face as the other girl tried to fully process what the hell she was saying.
“..Aaand I’ll shut up now. Shutting up at this very moment. Yep. Got it.” Biting her lip did get her mouth to stop moving, so Robin decided to do just that. Nancy eventually got closer, sitting down on the chair Steve had been previously occupying and looked at her, arms crossed over her chest. After a single beat, she laughed. A full, hearty laugh left her lips before she could stop herself.
Robin stood there, dumbfounded, like a fish with a gaping mouth that kept opening and closing. She felt her face heat up upon realising just how fuzzy Nancy’s laugh made her feel.
“I’m… I’m sorry, Robin, it’s just. I know you and Steve are just friends.” Nancy’s words fluttered with giggles, her melodic voice only making Robin’s hopeless pining worse. God, what was wrong with her? Sure, Nancy was a conventionally attractive girl, but Robin wouldn’t be blushing like a total maniac just because of that.
She could list a hundred reasons that justified those butterflies in her stomach. Firstly, Nancy Wheeler was intimidating as hell. After being paired up together when they split into investigation groups, Robin was immediately made aware that she was a total badass that wouldn’t take shit from anyone. Independent, fearless, insanely smart. The fact that she was hot was just a cherry on top, really. No wonder Steve had fallen for her. Robin felt as if she’d been pushed out of a fifth-story balcony by the time she realised that she had the hots for Nancy Wheeler.
Too bad that Nancy’s dad was so supportive of President Reagan that her entire family was, for sure, indoctrinated to shoot her on sight if they ever found out she was crushing on Wheeler.
All that was left for her was to pine silently, a goofy smile on her lips as she realised that Nancy had finally gotten the memo about her and Steve.
“But I didn’t come here to talk about Steve. Like, at all.” Nancy hummed, sitting straight once again, having shifted slightly in her chair after laughing, to which Robin had ended up joining in.
“To what do I owe the pleasure, then, Wheeler?” Robin grinned, feeling awfully giddy for some reason. God, she was head over heels for this girl. She’d later spend her days trying to get rid of her feelings for Nancy, awfully aware that they’d never be reciprocated. But, for now, she allowed herself to bask in the attention she was getting. She was already selfish for having survived everything else, so what did she have to lose by admitting to herself that the girl in front of her was totally the woman of her dreams?
“You really scared me back then.” Nancy muttered, eyes landing on the girl’s nails. She mindlessly picked at the dried blood to try and keep herself busy. Meanwhile, Robin could barely focus upon realising that she was practically holding her hand.
“..Yea…Yeah. I was scared shitless, too, I mean, I didn’t think I’d make it out of there, honestly.” Robin blabbed, body having gone rigid after trying not to move in the slightest so Nancy could keep doing.. whatever.
“When you told us to keep going and to leave you behind...” The girl’s eyes met with Robin’s. The blonde realised just how blue Nancy’s eyes were. Fuck. If she were good with words, she’d for sure think of something poetic that could compare her to the ocean, the sky, anything. But she was just Robin Buckley, an awkward disaster that couldn’t put together a single sentence without straying away from the original topic. “I thought I was going to lose you."
“Oh.” Robin swallowed dryly. Because how could she possibly respond to that? Maybe she was reading too much into it, but Nancy hadn’t generalised her sentence at all. But she denied herself the urge to feel happy for whatever the girl had said, however.
“You… Didn’t, though.” Her voice was so quiet that it came out as if she’d whispered. Nancy inched closer to her as a response. Robin felt herself grow breathless yet again. She looked so worried, the girl noted. “I’m right here, aren’t I?” Surely squeezing back Wheeler’s hand could be read as something purely platonic, right?
“Robin.” Nancy hummed, thumb brushing over her knuckles. God, she was still holding on to her hand.
“Yeah..?” She mumbled rather anxiously, completely captivated by Nancy Wheeler. By this point, the girl could do pretty much anything and Robin would still smile at her like a total doofus.
“I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you.” Wheeler continued to speak, far more articulate with her words than Robin could have ever been. Especially now that her brain had turned into outright mush. “And… Well, you’re okay, now, so I’m just going to come out and say it.”
“Say what, Nance? I-” Robin chuckled nervously, awfully aware of how clammy her hand was getting. God, she was sweating bullets and Nancy should really let go of her hand because it has to be uncomfortable for her, right?
“You have made me question everything in my life for the past few days that we’ve been together. I guess I’d never done that before because I liked having the stability of living a normal life. But what is our normal? My brother’s girlfriend has literal superpowers and we just came back from a different dimension after hunting monsters. None of that’s normal, right? So-”
She’s rambling. That kind of seems like the sort of thing I would do, Robin thought fondly. She hadn’t quite realised that she was already smiling like a moron just yet.
“So this ought to be normal for us, too. Please don’t freak out."
“I’m…kind of freaking out with all this secrecy, Nance-”
“I like you.” She blurted out, eyes squeezing shut as her hand gripped Robin’s, almost as if she was afraid that she’d slip away from her grasp.
Robin blinked, unable to conceal her frown. “I like you too…? You know this, we’ve already agreed that we were like, friends.”
“Not… Not like that! I like you! I like you the same way I like boys. And, I don’t expect you to say anything… I just… Wanted you to know.” Nancy whispers.
Robin couldn’t believe anything she was hearing. She was too busy drowning in everything that was Nancy Wheeler. She had to be imagining things, right? There was no way that this girl was telling her that she reciprocated a fraction of the things she felt for her.
Yet, despite having everything at her feet to make her feel ecstatic at this very moment, Robin let out a whimper. She couldn’t stop herself from doing so.
“Robin? Oh, God, I- I’m sorry, that was totally out of line and I-”
Last summer, Steve Harrington had been her confidant regarding her sexuality. Having to reject his confession absolutely broke her heart because she did love him. But Robin Buckley could never give him what he wanted from a girl. She’d named Nancy Wheeler as an example of the kind of girl that he should’ve confessed to. Of course, that Nancy had been a recollection of the memory she’d had of the girl when she was in high school.
Maybe she had been wrong about Nancy all along.
“You’re such a priss, you know that?” Robin finally decided to speak. She bit her tongue as soon as she opened her mouth because of course she’d blurt out something fucking stupid!
“Wha… What???” Nancy scoffed, eyes wide as she started to back away after pouring her heart out. Fuck!
“No I-” Robin grips her by the wrist, forcing the girl to keep looking at her so that she could explain herself. “I was over here, scared out of my mind that you were going to hate me once you found out I like girls!”
Now, that sort of information had shocked Nancy. Robin could almost see her tying the red strings together on her detective board to connect the dots, always the investigator.
“And you’ve been here the whole time preparing this speech for me! Nance! I’ve been tripping over my own feet for you ever since we were paired up to search the archives!”
She didn’t know if she was supposed to laugh or cry. But the realisation seemingly made Nancy smile so brightly that Robin immediately started to feel better.
“...I was still coming to terms with everything you made me feel, really.” The girl sighed softly, now sitting on the side of the hospital bed. Robin happily indulged in the warmth of Nancy’s shoulder flushed against hers.
“Are you still doubting yourself?” She paused, not wanting to ruin the moment. But, as always, her rambling got the best of her once more. “Because, let me tell you, the scale of queer people in Indiana is pretty close to zero, and if you really do like me, you should be sure that that’s what you want-”
Nancy smiled, hand gently moving up to hold Robin’s cheek. Her eyes met the girl’s, seeking permission to move further, teeth trapping her bottom lip as she looked up at her through thick lashes. Robin was an absolute goner by the time Nancy decided to speak. “Only one way to find out.”
Being sure of your sexuality didn’t inherently mean that you had to have any experience regarding that subject. Especially when you were seemingly the only queer woman in Hawkins. It was hard to date when you couldn’t be explicit about your likes and dislikes. So Robin supposed that Nancy really had been her first kiss. Ever.
It was everything she could’ve ever hoped for. Nancy’s lips were soft and her touch was so soothing that Robin felt herself practically melt, cheek leaning into the girl’s hand as her eyes fluttered closed.
They pulled away after a few seconds and Robin felt the unbearable urge to press her lips to Nancy’s again, to kiss her until she ran out of breath.
“...Was that okay?” Nancy muttered hesitantly, unsure whether she should pull away or not.
“Please kiss me again.” All she had to do was whisper, and just like that, she felt immediate relief, like she’d been drowning and Nancy had just pulled her to the shore. It was too much to handle, she’d gotten a taste of her and now Robin wanted nothing else than to kiss Nancy Wheeler over and over.
“How’s that for a priss?” Nancy joked, her thumb wandering to Robin’s bottom lip.
She couldn’t help but feel her body turn into jello, Robin Buckley having long since melted under her touch. A stupid grin was plastered on her face and she was fairly certain that her entire face was the shade of crimson from the way she felt the tips of her ears raise their temperature. She couldn’t figure out an adequate response to Wheeler’s teasing, anyway, so she settled for a simple “Mm.” in acknowledgement to her joke, her voice cracking considerably.
The stupid monitor that tracked her heartbeat had turned into background noise during the entirety of Steve’s visit, and now Nancy’s. Its rhythm, however, had sped up considerably to the point where both girls looked at the screen right away. It was fair to say that it had ruined the moment entirely.
“...Your heart.” She stated, eyes wide with a tint of worry. It all faded the moment she realised what was making her beat so rapidly. “That’s so.. Cute." Nancy mutters, getting the confirmation that Robin really was happy from the way her heart beat rapidly. There was no way to hide it with the display to the side, anyway.
Robin was so embarrassed she could die. But, at the moment, with Nancy right beside her, it didn’t feel so bad to be that vulnerable with someone.
“...I really hate this thing, you know? It’s been bugging me since I woke up.” She mumbles in a half-joking tone, eventually coming to terms with the fact that Nancy Wheeler was making her blush like a total schoolgirl after smooching the hell out of her. Robin laid back down against her pillow, soon lacing her hand with Nancy’s, their fingers entwining together like missing puzzle pieces. Now that was a poetic thought. Good job, Buckley, she could practically hear Steve say something as stupid as that.
“Mmmhm.” Nancy smiled, brushing Robin’s bangs back into place. She hoped she didn’t look like a total corpse. But maybe it had been just an excuse to play with her hair. Robin silently hoped it was the latter.
“Hey, Nance?”
“Yes?” The girl in question’s eyes found Robin’s once again and it was like she’d taken her breath away all over again. God, she had it bad for her.
“Thank you. For.. being you. When this all settles down I’m going to make it up to you, okay? We can go on a date, you can even choose a movie from Family Video and we could watch it together.”
“I’ll hold you to that, Robin. I already have one in mind.”
“Really?? What is it?” There she was, always the movie nerd.
“Do you have All The Right Moves?" Nancy grinned at her, shoulder brushing against Robin’s as she practically laid beside her.
“So that’s where the Tom Cruise poster comes from, eh?” Robin snickers.
Nancy decides not to comment on the matter, a lighthearted laugh leaving her lips as both girls leaned against the headboard of the hospital bed, hands clasped together, as they tried to cope with the idea that they had to sacrifice one of their friends for a town that didn’t care about any of them. But since she’d woken up in this bed, Robin finally felt at peace. Maybe change wouldn’t be so scary for as long as she had Nancy Wheeler at her side.