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Kuroba Kaito was known for a lot of things. Most of it are ones he claimed for himself, while an insignificant few were bestowed upon him with his own provocation—majority of the latter, unsurprisingly, came from one Hakuba Saguru.
Kaitō KID was similar, except the snide, unflattering remarks came from the KID Taskforce, other authoritative bodies he’d annoyed, and Hakuba Saguru.
(Contrary to popular belief, either Kaito did not, in fact, go out of their way to antagonize the blond detective. It was just that his smug bastard ways called for it. It wasn’t Kaito’s fault, honest.)
But the important thing is, Kuroba Kaito was known to be so full of ideas that it manifests in his being a chaotic force. He was, frankly, a general hazard to the people in his vicinity.
More so to certain individuals.
(No, it wasn’t just Hakuba.)
And on certain occasions.
(The population of Ekoda High shuddered. Something was not said right.)
Like a heist.
Heists were the times Kuroba Kaito really felt like he could unleash the creativity his brain had in abundance. A time for him to flex his mental muscles in a battle of wits against his detective—
—and Hakuba and his taskforce too, he guessed. Gotta appreciate them too even if they can be so dull. They did their best to (unwittingly) entertain Kaito, but sometimes they just fell short.
Ah, Tantei-kun had really spoiled Kaito with his convoluted mind games. Not much to do in the body of a seven year old, after all. The physical difference between chibi tantei and phantom thief was too one sided, even if Kaito had come out of that with a healthy dose of wariness for soccer balls and their apparent versatility as a tool of destruction.
(And, consequently, a very healthy appreciation for the grown-up Tantei-kun’s leg muscles. Kaito always spent time observing it—for self-preservation purposes, of course! Those legs could kill him if Kaito wasn’t careful.)
But now that Tantei-kun had become less of a Tantei-kun and more of a Meitantei, Kaito was just brimming with excitement every time a heist rolled around and Kudō Shin'ichi was slated to try his hand at catching Kaitō KID.
(Not that Kaito had left him much of a choice. Turns out sticking KID’s heist notices on the detective’s coffee maker was much more effective in getting his attention than, say, goading the Nuisance into testing the Detective of the East.)
And as the majority of the people who knew Kuroba Kaito would tell you, an excited, giddy Kaito was a force of nature nobody could ever stop— chaos was too light a term. Madness, Hakuba Saguru would claim, is more apt.
And that was what the KID heists had become ever since Kudō Shin'ichi had once again almost cornered Kaitō KID in something not very reminiscent of their first meeting at the Clock Tower. Because for one, Shin'ichi actually knew it was KID he was pursuing, and two, this one had been a tiny bit more intimate.
(Kaitō KID burst out into laughter, high and excited and manic. The thief tugged his bound wrists, feet dangling over a stairwell.
“Meitantei~” KID’S voice was too lilting and joyous for someone who had just been caught in his own trap. “Okaeri! (Welcome back!)”
Shin'ichi impressively combined an eye roll, a look of confusion, and a smirk.
“If you’re expecting a tadaima,” Shin'ichi drawled out, having been exposed to KID’s sense of humor enough to predict some of the nonsense the thief spouted, “I’m not saying it.”
KID gasped dramatically. “How rude!” And then with a flick of the wrist, he was free. A gloved hand nimbly twisted to grip the rope while the other tipped the brim of his top hat.
Shin'ichi remained nonplussed as, with a puff of smoke, KID appeared on top of the railings, perfectly balanced even as his cape swayed with the wind that came from the opened door to the rooftop.
“Dramatic,” Shin'ichi scoffed, but there was a tiny hint of a grin that Kaito was delighted to see.)
But that was beside the point.
Tonight was the seventh heist wherein Kudō Shin'ichi attended since his return—and yes, Kaito was counting, so what?
“Ladies and Gentlemen!"
The heist target, Cambion’s Regret, a ruby marquise, was said to have been the crystallized core of a seductress who fell in love with a man who scorned her very nature. As it apparently held the essence of a succubus, it could grant vitality, vigor, and energy.
Or something like it.
“My, it’s like you’re displaying it for me to take, Keibu. Thank you for your kindness.”
So Kaito, in his brilliance, decided that the theme for this heist was:
Seduction.
Nothing beyond PG-13, of course.
“After him!"
And what else was peak seduction but—
Stilettos? Really?
Shin'ichi glared at the offending article he suddenly found his feet stuck in.
It wasn’t that they were gaudy and pink, aimed to embarrass and humiliate. No, KID had actually chosen a rather tasteful design. It was a pair of square toe platform pumps made of black suede, the soles a cerulean blue with intricate black detailing, and in a daunting height of 6 inches at the heels. A pair of small spade charms hung by the lateral sides of the shoe quarters, silver and shining and, dare he say it, cute.
It was something his own mother would buy.
Shin'ichi would appreciate it more if it wasn’t glued to his feet and if he was still in the comfortable slacks he went to the heist with rather than the almost-boxers he suddenly found himself wearing.
At least KID had the grace to change their footwear while they were sitting (or lying down, for the unfortunate ones). Then again, he was sure the thief wouldn’t do that if it weren’t necessary for this trick.
A stream of incoherent expletives drew Shin'ichi’s attention away from (admiring) glaring at his feet.
Nakamori-keibu was doing a remarkable imitation of a newborn fawn as he tried to push himself up in his dark green, bejeweled, high heeled-gladiators. The shine of the peacock-green feather accents matched well with the inspector’s suit.
“KID!” Nakamori-keibu shouted as he fell off balance, legs trembling and red-faced. “I’ll get you for this!”
KID grinned, “I would say I chose well for you, Keibu, but would you like me to change you into these instead?” With a puff of smoke, the thief held out a pair of ultra shiny red slingback pumps. “It would match well with your face.”
Nakamori-keibu gnashed his teeth and glared at the rest of the taskforce who were in a similar boat as him. “Well! What are you still doing, sitting there and not catching that no good thief?!”
“B-but keibu!”
“It feels like it’s going to break if I stand!”
“How does my daughter manage to wear this kind of thing?!”
“You know, my wife chased me down with one of these before.”
“Hey, think criminals would ever attempt to break out if we have them wear stilettos?”
“Ahh! I think I got it!”
The entire task force stopped their chatter as one of them managed to stand without wobbling. Collectively, they cheered and applauded. Even KID did.
Shin'ichi sweatdropped at the scene.
Beside him, Hakuba Saguru grunted.
Reminded that there was another person with them in this suffering, Shin'ichi turned to see his fellow detective glaring fiercely at his own changed footwear. Even Shin'ichi had to goggle at the amount of straps and buckles of the high-heeled platform gladiator boots , of course without the zipper such a design would usually have.
“That’s…” Shin'ichi tried to find something to say and settled with a neutral, “...going to take a while to remove even without the adhesive.”
“Yes,” Hakuba heaved a sigh, testing his balance with one foot but not attempting to stand. He did seem like the kind of person to have too much dignity to risk tripping on heels. The foreign teenage detective looked at Shin'ichi wryly, “I don’t suppose you can stand up either?”
Quirking an eyebrow, Shin'ichi spared a glance to where KID was otherwise occupied by cheering—paper fans and bandana and all—for the brave souls of the taskforce, but Shin'ichi was pretty sure the thief was sneaking looks at the two teenage detectives.
Hmm.
Well, considering no one has broken their heels yet, that must mean KID at least got them ones that are able to support the weight of grown men.
Nakamori-keibu still hasn’t managed to keep his balance for more than a few seconds, never mind chasing after a phantom thief who looked like he was having the time of his life. The few who managed to walk were still rather shaky and too cautious to try anything more.
KID must have done something to the other taskforce members who weren’t caught in this trap, so he had all the time in the world to admire what he had done. It wasn’t like anyone would be able to chase after him.
Shin'ichi sighed before swiftly pushing himself up as if he wasn’t wearing a 6-inch monstrosity. He tested the heel, feeling how the insoles were actually pretty comfortable and the counter holding well. It took a few seconds, but Shin'ichi easily got the hang of using more leg muscles just to remain upright.
It was, hah, like putting on an old pair of shoes. Or riding a bike, really.
Somehow, his actions drew attention. Hakuba was looking at him wide-eyed, while Nakamori-keibu and most of his men gaped.
With a smirk dancing across his lips, Shin'ichi walked over to the curiously silent thief, steps deliberate and slow, confident and posture perfect.
“Confident, are you, KID?”
Without conscious permission, Kaito’s eyes trailed from black suede up to delicate ankles, to strong calves that Kaito knew from experience were like steel, lingering too long over tensed thighs that looked far too tempting to touch and caress, with all of that leading up to an enticingly pert—
Kaito’s mind blanked.
Sure, he wanted to see Meitantei wearing heels, that was sort of one of the main reasons why Kaito had chosen to bother with matching, but him actually walking and where did he get that soccer ball–
Oh shit.
Kaito ducked in time to dodge, eyes widening as the ball crashed against a decorative pot and pretty much pulverized it. He definitely felt the heat as it grazed him.
“Ah, sorry, I’ll pay for the damages,” Meitantei said sheepishly, “I haven’t tried to do this in heels before so my aim is off.”
‘But the strength isn’t?!' was the collective thought of everyone in the vicinity. Better yet, how can he remain standing after such strong, wide motions?
Under his Poker Face, Kaito whimpered.
“M-Meitantei,” KID was unable to hide the stutter, but he managed to gather himself. Drawing up to his height and being careful to put distance between him and the Detective of the East, KID bowed, “Well, with that, I’m afraid I shall take my leave.”
With a puff of smoke, KID was gone, but not before he caught a glimpse of Meitantei running as if 6-inch platform heels were nothing.
LATER
“Bocchama…”
“What is it, Jii-chan?”
“Why is your uniform stained with blood? You weren’t injured, were you?”
“A-ah, no I wasn’t. Don’t worry about it!”
Jii Kōnosuke stared down at the blood-stained cloth once more before finally looking at Kaito. He took note of the cotton balls shoved into the young master’s nostrils and the dazed look in his eyes.
Ah.
With a knowing smile, Jii patted the young man’s shoulder. “Be sure to use protection, bocchama.”
“WHAT?!”
“Toichi-sama would have wanted me to say it.”
“JII-CHAN!”