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Rakel tiptoed out of her parlor into the darkened, silent Queen’s Corridor. Her slippered feet made almost no noise on the ice blue carpet covering the oaken floors. She checked over her shoulder, but to her relief, only the night guards followed her. She wasn’t sure where to go, but she had to get away from that woman. When her magic began swirling, causing it to snow in the hallway, she huffed and flicked her wrist, halting the flurries.
She wandered out of the Queen’s Corridor and down the main passageways of the palace. She saw several hallways that led to unknown rooms and places. She had not yet learned all the ins and outs of this vast palace. I really need to find out what’s down there. Maybe when Phile’s back she’ll go exploring with me so that I won’t get lost.
After wandering for a while, she found herself in front of the doors of the throne room. She liked the throne room, especially when all was quiet and still. She pulled open the massive door and slipped inside, stopping long enough to look at the guards. “Please stay out here, Gentlemen.”
She closed the door behind her and settled into her ice throne with a sigh. She rubbed her palms over the glass arm rests, enjoying the cool feeling so similar to her own ice, and let her gaze fall on the large lake that lay just outside the huge window.
When the door opened, she went on alert. So help me, if she’s followed me here–. Rakel relaxed as Farrin entered the throne room and settled into the corner furthest from her. She returned to tracing the mountains with her eyes and feeling for the snow drifts with her magic. She had sat contemplating for nearly an hour before she turned to the darkened corner. “How do you do it, Farrin?”
He crossed the room in several long strides and brushed his fingers over the back of her hand. “Do what, Princess?”
“How do you hover all day without making me feel stifled?”
As usual, Farrin cut to the heart of the issue. “Is someone making you feel stifled, Love?”
Rakel harrumphed. “I asked first.”
“I guess I’m good at reading you. And if I don’t have a good reason to disturb you, I don’t.” He pushed a curl over her shoulder. “Now will you answer my question?”
“ That woman. ”
“Which one?”
“The one that actually lives in my apartments. I can’t get away from her. She’s always wanting to dress me or undress me or do my hair or go through my wardrobe or a thousand other things. Sometimes it makes me wish for my ice castle.”
Farrin’s eyebrows went up.
Rakel deflated. “Not really. I guess it’s just overwhelming.”
“I think it’s pretty normal for royals to have servants do things for them.”
“While it’s true that I don’t want to go back to exile and isolation, I am not used to being constantly surrounded by people, either.”
“It’s been a difficult adjustment.”
When she looked up at him, surprised, he chuckled. “It’s my job to be observant, Love.”
She screwed up her face, but decided not to think too deeply about that statement. Instead, she said, “Steinar’s got a horde of servants that do all kinds of things for him. Honestly, I don’t know how he stands it. I would be ready to wall myself away from everyone.”
“You have Oskar.”
“Yes. He’s always available. He takes care of things for me, but he never–.” She puffed a frustrated sigh when she could not think of how to explain.
“He’s not constantly underfoot,” Farrin summarized.
“How do you do that? Are you sure your magic isn’t reading minds?”
He chuckled. “I don’t need to read minds to see how bothered you are by this. Why don’t you talk to your brother about it?”
She sighed. “It feels petty. I’m sure I’ll get used to it eventually.”
“Why do you need to? Is there anything you want this woman to do for you that Oskar can’t?”
She just looked into his eyes wonderingly for a moment. Then she stood and put her arms around his waist. He held her close until she was ready to let go.
***
Farrin watched over the next several days as “that woman” trailed Rakel everywhere she went. With Phile out of the country, there was no one acting as a buffer between the princess and the servant. Rakel’s magic seemed perpetually disturbed, and Farrin hoped that soon she would decide to discuss the issue with King Steinar.
One morning, just as Farrin was beginning his shift, he heard Rakel’s voice carrying clearly into the hallway. “NO! No thank you. Just let me do it!”
Suddenly the parlor door burst open and Rakel fairly fled across the hall to his side. Her feet were bare and her hair fell loose around her shoulders. It looked like she had been crying.
When the lady’s maid came to the door of the parlor and looked out, she said, “I don’t understand, Princess. Do you not wish for my help with your hair?”
Rakel had managed to partially wedge herself between his ribcage and the wall, her shoulder poking uncomfortably into his shoulder blade. He shifted slightly to alleviate the pressure on his back.
“No. I want to do my hair myself. Just go find something else to do.”
The woman’s dark brown eyes held confusion and something akin to hurt. “Have I done something wrong, Princess?”
“No, Charraine.” Rakel sighed, and he felt her sag. “No, you haven’t done anything wrong.” She dislodged her shoulder and stepped away from him. “I just want to finish getting ready myself. Can you just go–,” Rakel paused for a moment then said, “take Koray for a walk?”
Charraine still looked a bit confused, but curtsied. “Of course, Your Highness.”
Rakel did not reenter her apartments until the woman and the dog exited. Then she breathed a deep sigh and dropped her head to Farrin’s shoulder. “Finally.”
He simply waited, knowing that she would talk when she was ready.
She mumbled, “Would it be spiteful to ask you not to let her back in?”
He chuckled internally. “Probably.”
“Fine,” she said begrudgingly before heading back into her apartments and closing the door a bit too firmly behind her.
***
The next morning, Rakel strode up to King Steinar’s attendant, “Harold, when would the king be available for me to talk with him?”
“He is available now. Shall I announce you?”
“Yes, please.”
A moment later, Harold ushered the princess into the king’s study, bowed, and left the siblings to converse.
Steinar stood up from his desk and smiled at his sister. “Rakel, how are you this morning?”
She moved over to the desk and took the seat he indicated. Then he seated himself as well. She said nothing for several long seconds. The king furrowed his brows. “Is something wrong, Sister?”
“No. Not exactly. Not wrong. I don’t know.”
Steinar stood and moved around the desk to sit in the chair next to her. “What’s on your mind, Rakel?”
“I know I’m being petty and not acting very royal and it’s probably childish even to bring it up, but Farrin thought I should talk to you about it so here I am.”
Steinar looked befuddled. “I’m listening.”
“I just–. I hate it. I can’t do it. I know I’m supposed to do it and I’m a princess and that is what normal princesses do, but I just can’t. Well, I can, but I’m uncomfortable,” she babbled.
After a moment’s hesitation, Steinar asked, “What is making you uncomfortable, Rakel?”
She searched his eyes for a moment. Then she rose. “I am being ridiculous. I’m sorry I disturbed you.”
Steinar stood and caught her hand. “Rakel, will you please at least tell me what the ridiculousness is about?”
“The lady’s maid,” she sighed, sinking back into her chair.
“Charraine? Has she done something wrong? I checked very thoroughly. She is a magic sympathizer and came with excellent references.”
Rakel sighed wearily. “She’s really wonderful, Steinar, I promise. She really hasn’t done anything wrong. She’s kind and patient and helpful. I just–. I’m never alone.”
“You want to be alone?”
“Yes. I mean, no. Well, not all the time. I’m just not used to having someone underfoot all the time. I don’t know how you stand it.”
“It’s the way that I grew up. Father and Mother always had various attendants with them. Running a country is a lot of work. Having the servants taking care of the day-to-day things frees the king to care for the responsibilities of leadership.”
“That makes sense,” Rakel said quietly.
Rakel could almost see the wheels in Steinar’s brain turning as he puzzled out his sister’s problem. “Do I understand correctly? You want to have the option to be with others without being forced to be so?”
Rakel nodded vigorously. He had summed it up perfectly.
Steinar stood and paced, as Rakel was learning was his habit when he was thinking. “On Oskar’s advice, I chose not to give you the number of servants that would befit someone of your social station. Instead, Oskar helped me find someone who was willing to take all of those duties and essentially roll them together into one job. That’s a lot of responsibility, and I did not think it was possible to find someone who would do so. Oskar said that he would share the duties with the lady’s maid. After quite a lot of searching, we found Charraine.”
Rakel felt her face heat and her heart filling with guilt. “I did not realize how difficult the job was for her. And I’ve only made it worse.”
“We were trying to make you comfortable, Rakel.”
Rakel smiled at her brother. “Thank you for being so thoughtful, Steinar. I knew you had put a lot of time and effort and thought into choosing who to have help me. It’s the reason I have not spoken to you about it before now. When you asked me, I thought that just one maid would be fine.”
“Obviously, it hasn’t worked the way I had intended. So, tell me, Rakel, what do you want changed?”
She did not have to contemplate her answer. She had thought much about it for weeks. “I want my apartments to be my own. I have always made my own bed and brushed my own hair and gotten myself ready for the day or the night. I don’t want help with those things.”
“Is there anything you do want help with?”
Rakel blushed a little. “I like having someone clean the apartments for me and do the laundry and such. And I am hopeless at keeping an appointment calendar.”
Steinar thought for a moment. “Do you want to keep Oskar?”
Rakel nodded vigorously. “I don’t feel self conscious having to ask him for help. He understands what I need better than I do, usually.”
“What things were done for you when you lived on Ensom?”
“My meals were brought to me, the laundry was done for me. My bedchamber and bathchamber were separate from my ice castle. That way, the servants could come clean them without having to see me or speak to me. When they were done cleaning, the servants would ready a bath for me. Oskar requested that every Saturday I avoid my bed and bath chambers until after noon for that purpose.”
For a moment, Steinar looked like he would pop the top button on his doublet. His face was scarlet and his hands were shaking. “I can’t believe Oskar would be party to that nonsense.”
Rakel shrugged. “It wasn’t easy to find someone willing to be in the same room with me.”
“Inhumane.”
“Steinar, I did not tell you these things to make you angry. I only wanted you to understand.”
The young king blew out a long breath and paced for several more minutes. Finally, he turned to his sister. “I asked Oskar to find servants for you who were magic sympathizers. Those who clean your apartments, launder your linens, bring your tea–everything. Have you found any of them to treat you poorly?”
Rakel shook her head. “No. They are all very kind. Including Charraine. I do like her, Steinar. She’s very sweet. She’s just never gone. Ever.”
“Would it solve the problem if Charraine lived in the servant’s wing and only came to help you dress and do your hair and such?”
Rakel shook her head. “I don’t want help dressing and undressing, Steinar. It’s not necessary. I’ve been doing my own hair for years. Having help to get ready for a special occasion and properly fasten the ties on a ballgown may be different, but on a daily basis, I’m fine on my own.”
“What if there were a certain time of day that Charraine would come to do whatever tasks need doing? You would always know when to expect her and could avoid contact if you felt the need.”
“That sounds like it is worth a try. Would she still be available if I needed her–like Oskar is?”
“Yes. We will make sure of that. I will have your lady’s maid move to the servants’ wing and be available to you, but not come to you outside of her regular hours unless called. The other duties will not change. Will that be satisfactory?”
Rakel nodded.
“If things are still not working the way you would like, please come speak to me about it. We will find something that will work for you.”
She sighed with relief, though she still felt a bit guilty for eschewing the gift her brother had tried to give her. “Thank you, Steinar. I am sorry that I am causing so much difficulty. I will try to do better.”
Steinar sat in the brown leather chair that mirrored her own and clasped her hands. “Rakel, you are never a bother. We knew it would take some adjusting for you to live in the palace. We will figure it out together.”
“I should go. I have taken enough of your time. Thank you, Steinar.”
“Of course. And Sister, do not hesitate to come to me. Harold has been told never to turn you away without specific instructions to the contrary. Even if I am in a meeting with the nobles, they will wait. It’s one of the perks of being king–people have to wait on you.” He shot her a boyish grin.
Rakel was taken aback. “I don’t know what to say, Steinar. It seems too much.”
He shook his head. “It is the way it should have been–would have been–had you grown up here. Father gave the same instructions to his own attendant on my behalf.”
“The kingdom needs you, Steinar.”
“And it gets most of my time, attention, and work. But what kind of example am I setting for our people if I don’t take time for my family?”
Rakel opened her mouth to respond, but closed it again. Twice. Finally, she said the only thing she could think to say, “I’m glad you’re my family.”
“There is nothing on this continent I am more thankful for than you, Rakel. I love you.”
As she left her brother’s office, Rakel was not sure her feet touched the floor.