Work Text:
one
it all went downhill from there. the starting point.
after more than twenty one months of very obvious display of feelings for one particular boy, soobin anticipates a rejection. except, what he gets in return is a hundred, scratch that, a thousand times worse than a simple rejection.
he's stuck half way in the middle.
hueningkai is pretty. like, really really pretty. an angel, soobin would say. the said gorgeous boy had a sort of white halo around him all the time, which didn't fail to captivate soobin everytime. soobin is, like very very much in love with hueningkai. and has been, for a long, long time. so when soobin came to a breaking point (soobin would pull out his hair anytime if he didn't get to kiss hueningkai's cute little metal mouth - yes , metal mouth- he would really lose his patience), he decided for the best. he would talk to hueningkai about his raging feelings.
and so, soobin stands in front of hueningkai right now, grabbing his hands into soobin's own gigantic hands. soobin's lungs have stopped accepting any forms of oxygen. his body refuses to co operate with himself unless he receives an answer from hueningkai's side- no matter positive or negative. soobin cannot absolutely bare the suspense anymore. it's driving him nuts.
hueningkai's cute little face is bent downwards, staring into his own lap as if it were the most interesting thing ever. soobin doesn't approve of that one bit. and so he takes action.
"hueningkai." no endearing pet names, no cute tone, just his name. soobin pulls kai's face to his level by the chin. the said boy's face turns carmine. "look at me, kai-yah. just your soobin hyung."
this, for some reasons unknown, makes hueningkai instantly look towards soobin. his face lights up at the eye contact. he's glad that hueningkai's co-operating with him.
"you heard what hyung said, right?" soobin asks again, because he doesn't want to waste time repeating his words. soobin either hurriedly wants to kiss him, or go home and cry about it. a usually calm, patient, well mannered boy soobin, has turned different under the influence of young love. soobin frowns when hueningkai merely nods at him shyly,not expressing himself very clearly. it makes soobin mad- to one extent. but how could one be mad at hueningkai's loveable and squishy face? soobin keeps it in for the sake of kai, and kai only.
"i'm sorry to be impatient, but i need an answer, kai." soobin is really losing the last bits of his patience ever since hueningkai has taken a vow of silence. "not to be one bit forceful." he knows he's being forceful. but soobin cannot help it. cannot help one thing he says or does.
"i...me too, hyung." hueningkai very cleverly avoids the words soobin has been dying to hear since forever (in very serious and literal terms), which makes soobin let out a huge sigh. he's giving up.
"i'm sorry for bothering you, kai-yah." soobin gets up slowly, taking his hands back to himself. he brushes his sweaty hands on his shiny black pants with a puff of air, and turns a slight angle from hueningkai. "you should go home."
"no!" hueningkai shrieks, and pulls soobin back down where he was sitting. there's a little look of shock on soobin's face. oh, so hueningkai does have a voice. soobin seems a little bit satisfied. putting on a modest look, soobin sits down with a fake shade of sadness on his face. he gets kai good. "please, don't go, hyung."
"i...i really really like you too, soobinnie hyung." the noise he makes after those words leave his lips in inhumane, like a shrill seagull. soobin finds hueningkai's shy behaviour so endearing. he wants to kiss, kiss those lips so bad. and now, he has a great chance. he has the best chance, just a little bit closer...
and soobin doesn't even have to do it himself. hueningkai himself, willingly, moves closer to soobin. soobin's hands are out of his control, really, but they remember to be gentle - it's hueningkai afterall. the boy he loves. the younger reaches out his hands to soobin, and soobin pulls him in for a hug. neither of them seem to care that they're completely over each other, with hueningkai literally seated in soobin's lap. he discovers that he quite likes the sensation of hueningkai on him. it makes him feel complete.
"i'm happy, huening-ah." soobin grins wide. "i'm glad you feel the same too." soobin is fighting the urge to kiss him softly, so he doesn't hurt his braces too much.
hueningkai has always looked cute with his braces. ever since he got them an year ago, his aegyo level doubled up, while he aged downwards. it made his cheeks look fluffier, and just gave a more innocent aura to him. soobin loves it.
hueningkai mumbles something into soobin's chest, making the elder pull away from the embrace. "what was that?"
"you made me wait for so long." a whine left kai's lips, and wow- soobin sat there in shock. when did hueningkai even learn to speak like that? you made me wait for so long? soobin was really going crazy. with kai. because of kai.
soobin decides to hide his stunned face, and leans in closer to kai. and oh, he's so close finally, finally and soobin can kiss hueningkai freely. anytime he wants. hueningkai would be his boyfriend soon after the kiss. butterflies erupt in soobin's stomach.
and just when soobin's eyes shut and kai understands what's happening, he turns his head away from soobin's approaching lips. soobin halts instantly. he pulls completely away from hueningkai, avoiding eye contact for a whole minte. hueningkai just wanted to play around with him, yeah. soobin conclusion was that.
"hyung." hueningkai whispers slowly, a little scared perhaps. "what were you doing?"
now soobin shoots him a blank look. he knows that his hyuka is very slow and dumb and innocent, but obviously not to such an extent.
he avoids the question, and springs up one of his own on kai. "do you not want to kiss? am i reading the signs wrong?"
hueningkai remains silent. for a few seconds. then for a good minute then he speaks again.
"i do, hyung. i've dreamt about it forever." he admits it honestly. once again, it leaves soobin in major shock. if so, then...
"what's the matter then?" soobin is losing his cool way too quick. he'd never even in the worst of his nightmares hurt hueningkai, or make him do something that he didn't want, but... soobin required a real reason.
"i-i've never kissed before." he admits shyly. "you'd be my first."
"and?" soobin asks. "would you not like that?"
"no, no !" hueningkai is fast to clarify, because soobin already looks so sad. and he hasn't even got to the worst part of it all. "it-i-i want it to be with you. my first kiss."
"kai-yah." soobin pleads. " please for the love of god, get to the point."
"i...don't want my-our first kiss to be ruined. by my stupid and annoying braces." hueningkai puffs out in one breath, and he's much too afraid to even look up at soobin's reaction.
soobin's face - when hueningkai does muster up the courage to look at him - looks blank. he looks neither shocked nor angry, as he had thought he would be. he seemed to reflect something else. confusion.
"i'm sorry, what?" soobin blurts out before his brain even gets to process it once. down goes the saying of thinking twice before speaking down the drain. soobin puts no thought into his words. which, he realizes later, was very important.
"i don't want you to have to kiss me through my ugly braces, hyung. i know they look stupid on me and make me look like a kid and -" hueningkai breaths heavily amidst his rambling. "- i don't want my braces to come in the way of our first kiss."
and that might've been the most stupid thing soobin has ever heard in his life. he would allow himself to laugh at this, if it weren't for his sad face.
"huening-ah." soobin calls out and the said boy looks up slightly to match his eye level to soobin. "you're cute." soobin says as he brings their faces closer for their foreheads to touch. they stay in the position for a little while before soobin realizes that hueningkai hasn't taken a puff of air into his system ever since. for the sake of the cutie, he pulls away from a flustered boy with a chuckle. "you're so, so cute." soobinn brings his hands to grab kai's cheeks, and then whispers again. "cute."
"hyung?" kai tilts his head.
"ugly?" soobin asks, using the same adjective that kai used to describe his braces. soobin wonders if kai and him are talking about the same thing. or if he's ever bothered looking in the mirror. because ugly? yeah, no. "your braces make you look ten times more adorable, you know that?" soobin stared steadily into kai's eyes, trying to reassure him. "you sure they're ugly?"
"they're not, kai." soobin continues, taking hueningkai's hands into his own a little while later. he touches each of his finger first, before intertwining their fingers together. kai feels a bit protected. "you look so good with your braces. really wanted to kiss you earlier 'cause of them." soobin just bluntly speaks out his mind now, not a care for what his reaction would be.
"no." hueningkai breathes a little harshly, like he's unable to do so. soobin understands. he wouldn't be able to breathe either, if he were in kai's position. he gets it. "can you-uh, wait till my braces are off?" he knows his demands are absurd. hueningkai does, in fact, want to kiss right now. because who wouldn't? but he wouldn't let stupid wires in his mouth get in way of his first kiss, either. what if something went wrong, and his braces hurt soobin- he doesn't even want to think about it.
soobin on the other hand, is on the verge of pulling all his hair out. kiss, kiss and kiss his brain chants. no! he wants to shout, and pushing hyuka's hands away so there's no obstacle between their lips. alas, soobin cannot do that. what hueningkai wants, hueningkai gets- even if that means that soobin will have to suffer for long periods of time.
"if that's what you want..." soobin doesn't even want to agree this hurriedly. "...then okay,huening-ah. hyung can wait." hyung actually cannot wait a single second more, but soobin wouldn't say that. never out loud.
"are you disappointed?" kai's voice is small, like a squeak and he looks so so sad, it breaks soobin's heart. more than the lack of the firey kiss he's been craving. fuck kissing (not really, because soobin is still as mad for kissing hueningkai), hueningkai came above it all.
"no, darling." soobin lies a little. it makes kai's face light up brightly. soobin lets out a small inaudible subtle sigh, before pulling his boyfriend- wait. he cannot call hueningkai his boyfriend yet. he aims on changing that.
"hueningkai." soobin calls out his full name, making kai pout a little. "will you be my boyfriend? will you let hyung take you on a date?"
kai giggles a bit, turning red and then burrying his face in soobin's chest. the older of the two takes up this opportunity to play with his hair again.
"yes." soobin hears somewhere between everything hueningkai was saying. "yes, yes hyung." he repeats more clearly, which makes soobin's heart swell. the kai kamal huening- who he had been pining over for almost two years, is finally his boyfriend. hueningkai leans in and presses a small kiss to soobin's cheek. in awe, soobin tocuhes where hueningkai's lips had been not less than a moment ago. he feels giddy. a good giddy.
and that was when soobin was denied his long waited kiss for the first time.
many more to come.
two
soobin still doesn't know his limits.
fast forward one week from the day at school when soobin really did confess to hueningkai. soobin hasn't seen his boyfriend in person ever since. were they ignoring each other? no. just a typical school week when all teachers had dumped their fair share of work on the poor students, and they had no option to stay in at home and complete their work. normal.
not for soobin.
he's been fucking losing his mind everyday he doesn't see, or talk to hueningkai. sure, they've taken texting to the next level because of lack of physical presence, but that doesn't satisfy soobin one bit. it annoys him more, reminds him how kai had been away from him the entire week after the confession. pain.
soobin aims to fix that.
you
shouldn't be asking this to you over text but
would you go out on a date with me?
babie hyuka
???
what
you
a date
couples go out on dates, hyuka
babie hyuka
right right
okie
i'm free this weekend
you
perfect
babie hyuka
^3^~
soobin smiles. he's meeting hueningkai this weekend. his first date with hueningkai. and..hueningkai's first date. in general.
he feels the need to make it worth for kai. he wants to go an extra mile. and so, soobin being the stupid man in love decides to spend all of his savings to reserve a table for the both of them at the best restaurant in the entire goddamn city. when he searches up the prices, he almost curses. that place was about to rob him. nonetheless, soobin spends all of his money. it's for hueningkai, the boy he loves. no amount of money could ever add up to his happiness.
ew soobin thinks, since when i did become such a sap?
but then he remembers, kai's geniune laughing face everytime someone said something funny. or even not funny. he was hueningkai afterall; he'd laugh even at the lamest of jokes ever. soobin now knows why he's such a sap for him. he understands. he loves.
soobin cannot wait for hueningkai to have his best day ever.
|
soobin waits patiently outside hueningkai's house in his car. he's spent more than an hour dressing up. and that's the most soobin has been dedicated to something. he didn't want to look like a weirdo beside hueningkai's beauty. he wouldn't dress modest for once.
he hears the door shut, and he looks up- to find the sole reason of his happiness. his boyfriend, hueningkai. his beloved cutie. hueningkai spots soobin's car, and waves excitedly. he waddles over to soobin's vehicle in the cutest way ever. soobin's stomach does a flip. he does not want to throw up rainbows and butterflies.
opening the door of the car aggresively, hueningkai peeps in and waves his hand close to his face. "hyung!" his reaction upon seeing soobin is cute. soobin wants to chomp his cheeks. or kiss them. so he opts for the latter, and places a shy kiss on hueningkai's smooth cheeks. his fair complextion turns carmine at that action, and soobin giggles innocently. having seen soobin's satisfied reaction, he whines. "you can't just do that !"
"why?" soobin asks. "i'm your boyfriend. i can do anything i want. plus, that's the best you're willing to give me, is it not? i'd be a fool to not take up the bare minimum you have to offer." soobin hides his urge to kiss hueningkai's lips. he looks away for a moment, before looking right back. he cannot let his guard down.
kai playfully hits soobin's arm, and the elder lets out an exaggerated groan. he suddenly remembers something that he brought for huening, and turns back to the backseat to grab a small surprise for kai.
when soobin turns back towards the front again, kai lets out a small gasp looking at the flowers that soobin holds. soobin's sparkly eyes look into kai's lovingly, while passing on the bouquet into his delicate hands. he watches endearingly as kai runs his pretty long fingers across the petals of the various assorted various flowers. he looks happy. soobin's already happy too.
"hyung.." kai finds the best words to thank him. "you didn't have to bring me this."
it comes out weirder than he expects it to. soobin raises an eyebrow at it, and falls into a panic.
"do you not like them? i can-"
"no!" hueningkai is fast to defend. he never knew he'd be a flower person. apparently now he was, because simple flowers from soobin's side made him feel so giddy. maybe it wasn't the flowers after all. maybe it was just soobin. "it's just that, i've never received flowers before and..."
"oh." soobin lets out one breathy laugh. "you're going to be experiencing many more things that you haven't done before. with me, okay?"
fuck soobin and his words hueningkai thinks, because how does he always have the perfect things to say? he inhales sharply, letting soobin's words settle down in his mind. he doesn't think he can forget this any time soon. he doesn't want to, either.
hueningkai tries to form a nice and coherent reply in his head, but till then, it's too late. soobin has already started the car, and is driving. soobin hums along to the song that played on the radio. what hueningkai finds so hot is that soobin's driving with only one hand. the other rests on the armrest between the two, and lord , he looks so effortlessly hot. kai has to look away for a while as to not damage his eyes. and heart.
"where are we going?" kai almost smacks himself in the face for not having asked this before.
"you'll see." soobin doesn't look away from the road. he drives safe, hueningkai thinks and giggles. my lawful boyfriend.
when the car stops, hueningkai's jaw is left wide open. his legs refuse to move out of the car. he takes one good look at soobin who's looking at him fondly. non-verbally, hueningkai points at the place through the window, and his eyes rise up in a question. when soobin nods, hueningkai gulps harshly.
"that place..hyung." hueningkai freezes. "it's so expensive!"
soobin chuckles at his tone. hueningkai looks so horrified. soobin resists the urge to ruffle hueningkai's hair. it's so neatly done (for once) that he doesn't want to ruin it one bit. instead, he opts to look away.
"hyung." hueningkai whines a bit. "i don't think we should be going there. it really is so expensive!"
"don't worry about prices, kiddo." soobin fists his hands for he's sure that his self control is non existent and shoves them into his pockets. he really doesn't want to mess up kai's hair. "let's go in."
half an hour into the fancy place, and hueningkai is already so excited about it. he grabs soobin's hand really tight in excitement. the older's heart does a few flips at that, and he tries to not pay it any attention to calm himself down. but how can he? hueningkai looks so cute and hyped while eyeing everything around so adorably. soobin really thinks he likes him more.
the food arrives, and hueningkai looks at it in awe, as if that was not what he had expected. the quantity was so stingy, hueningkai pouted. soobin looked at him and then kai looked back up at him. soobin bursts out in a laughter.
"hyung." he leans in and whispers slowly, and soobin knows what he's gonna say and he's already giggling hard about it. he can't wait to tease him about this later. "why's it so less?"
"because that's how expensive places work, kai-ah." soobin explains with a giggle. he watches kai try to make sense of things and he has the cutest pout on his face. soobin really wants to eat him up. "eat up!" soobin instructs.
he hesitates a bit, but then looks at the wide array of food in front of him. he cannot resist. and so, he digs in. soobin watches him fondly, and he cannot believe that hueningkai is finally his.
this scene has been a fantasy so many times in soobin's mind, that he cannot differentiate between fiction and real life. but its the real thing! it's their first date and soobin is trying his best not to kiss him.
he watches so silently, it's almost creepy. except it's not. it's just soobin admiring how much more cute hueningkai can even get. soobin wants to see him happy forever. if there was ever a day where kai stopped laughing and it was because of him, he'd never forgive himself.
negative thoughts aside, soobin knows how to always take care of hueningkai. almost since forever, soobin and hueningkai have been friends, and he's taken care of him in one way or the other, right? soobin knows his ways with hueningkai inside out. there's no absolute room to mess up even the slightest. he takes a glance at the food and then back at hueningkai. he's pure and cute, and soobin's heart feels full.
when hueningkai tilts his head cutely after they're done eating, soobin resists his wild urge to squish his cheeks. when the waiters come back to the table, they shoot soobin a look that he doesn't comprehend. their they're judging him for looking like a mess around kai, or they doubt that soobin is capable of paying the bill. either way, soobin clears all doubts and judgements on their faces when he pays the bill and leaves a tip, and walks out hand in hand with kai.
it's late, and most of the shops are now gradually closing. the lights out on the street get dimmer, and the commotion reduces. the situation feels also perfect- and soobin feels like he and kai are the only ones in the world. he feels kai clinging on his sleeve, and soobin holds his hand again, this time tighter. he never took himself for the sappy romantic type of guy, but every passing second with kai makes him discover his inner sap.
"hyung." kai whispers slowly, and that's when soobin realises that the entire time they're been silent. he's never found himself in such calm and peaceful silence before. it didn't feel awkward. never with kai. he smiles back at kai. "i'm happy." his eyes glisten in the dark, and it's absolutely breathtaking. soobin is almost lost before he can even answer him.
kai has to shake him so soobin comes back to his senses. embarrassing. "hyung." he giggles, and oh he giggles so cutely. "i said i was happy with this..us." soobin is happy too, overjoyed, in fact. "but i'm still hungry." he confesses slowly. soobin blinks once. and then twice. and his stomach rumbles as a reply to kai's words. upon hearing the noise, soobin wants to dig into a hole and die. but kai only laughs joyously at that. and then maybe, soobin doesn't want to die after all.
"me too." soobin is now open, more honest. he learns to be comfortable around kai. "all those small portions are no match for my body. what a scam." soobin ruffles kai's hair when he smiles wider at that. "mc donalds?"
when kai nods excitedly at that and tells soobin something about a new burger that he had been wanting to try, soobin cannot help but want to kiss hueningkai real bad. he sneaks a glance at his lips while he speaks, and apparently kai realises that soobin is way too out of it. "hyung." he whines. "why're you so distracted today?"
it's nothing, soobin would usually lie, but today- he's not even strong enough to lie to kai's face. he knows he's not as oblivious as he looks like. soobin knows that kai is aware of his major kissing issue. soobin remains silent as he bites his lip. instead, he pulls in kai for the warmest hug ever.
kai's chin rests on soobin's shoulder and it feels perfect, like it was always meant to be there. they fit perfectly, and when they pull apart, soobin cannot help but look at kai's braces peeking out through his cute smile. out of sheer adoration, he leans close enough, enough that if he moves any closer, their lips would touch and-
he resorts to kissing kai on cheek, and then on his forehead. phew. that was a close call. soobin doesn't know how much longer he's going to let this go on for, before he bursts. kai looks at him knowingly, and it's embarrassing for him. very embarrassing that soobin cannot control his morals and can listen to the one thing that kai asked for.
but he doesn't say anything out loud. instead, he kisses soobin on the cheek lightly, and holds his hand once again.
"let's go?" he asks slowly, when he sees soobin regain himself after kai's kiss on the cheek. soobin's cheeks are brushed a cute pink, and kai cannot help but want to eat him up.
"yeah." soobin mumbles under his breath. "brat."
three
soobin learns to control himself after that day. or so he thinks.
he doesn't move to kissing hueningkai the moment he sees him, instead, soobin leans in for a hug. if he makes cute sounds and soobin wants to go feral, he grits his teeth together and gulps the feeling down. he does everything, except kissing kai. which is good progress. he's proud of himself.
after weeks of being mushy with one another, soobin starts to get used to it. the presence of his boyfriend doesn't fluster him to the point that he cannot talk without blushing anymore. he feels human. and hueningkai feels like a daily part of his life.
there was a little whisper of air that told him that it was going to rain today. he looks up at the sky with hopes of a pleasant downpour. the day - already perfect - turns better with the announcement of rain. and the day only gets better. he's expecting to meet kai soon. a good day, and it's something he can smile about in a long amounts of time.
when soobin receives a phone call from kai, his face lights up and nothing but kai's ridiculously cute face comes to mind. he picks up instantly, and the familiar voice fills his ears.
"soobin hyung." a voice chirps in through the phone, and soobin doesn't realise it, but he shuts his eyes for a few seconds, and soaks in his voice. "i finished my classes for the day! you said you'd be free today, right?"
soobin doesn't know how to tell kai that he'd cancel any of his plans to see him in flesh. and since he doesn't, he passes on it. kai can know some other day. their days together are plenty anyway. he isn't going anywhere, and neither is kai.
"of course." he settles on this, and he hears kai make a noise through the speaker of the phone. "where are you right now?"
"the park." a simple place has all the memories flooding back into soobin's system. the place where they first met as teenagers five to six years ago. soobin can never forget the new boy in the neighbourhood. the foreign boy with braces and the smallest face ever. he was way shorter than soobin, and soobin being, well- soobin, had the desire to own every thing cute on the planet. and his only want was to befriend the new and pretty boy who had stepped foot in the community.
"ah, okay." soobin smiles a little to himself, and a little for the sake of the pleasant memory. "i'm coming there soon. wait for me,kai-yah."
"okay!" he hears a cute squeak and then the line goes dead. no matter how hard soobin tries to match kai's levels of energy, and aegyo, he doesn't ever seem to get there. but he understands. it's kai's charm. the little dimples that he dies to see, when kai giggles and covers his mouth with his hands, and refuses to take off. only once or twice has soobin seen kai laugh freely without covering his braces, and it's an absolute bummer. he doesn't understand how kai himself could dislike the element that he liked most.
soobin walks slowly with his thoughts of kai and the rain towards the park, when he spots one of his two favourite things. kai waves from under a tree as he sees soobin, and all of soobin's stress is already cured, already taken care of. by the time soobin can make it over to where kai stands, the drizzle has already begun. the tiny droplets of water that fall as a blessing on soobin (and as a curse on his glasses) seem to be drawing him closer to home.
kai gently collides against soobin's big frame at once, and his hands instantly sneak to curve around soobin's waist. it startles soobin a bit, but he returns the hug eventually. kai feels warm against soobin's chest, and they're almost the same height even, perfect for a hug.
by the time kai pulls apart with a grin on his face, the rain intensifies. it's falling a little harder than before, and soobin watches as people open up their umbrellas, or either start running away from the park. he takes a look at kai, who seems to be looking up at the clouds with a frown. he pulls soobin by his hand towards a tree and soobin allows himself to be dragged by him.
"what's wrong?" soobin asks, upon seeing that kai's frown didn't end at all. his braces, still poked out his lips as he pouted and pointed to the sky helplessly.
"the rain ruined everything!" soobin is actually so endeared by everything that hueningkai does. every action of his urges him to chomp his cheeks away. but he maintains his distance. "we don't even have an umbrella to be romantic in the rain..."
oh. soobin understands. so this was the issue. kai wants to be romantic in the rain. soobin has to almost stop himself from cooing embarrassingly at that. kai is so cute. he's sure he's said this a hundred times now, but he'd say it again. kai is so cute.
"we don't need an umbrella to be romantic in the rain, kai-yah." soobin quotes his exact words to fluster him, and earn the little whine from him. he flushes hard and throws himself into soobin's chest upon hearing those words.
"no...i didn't mean it that way..." he rushes to clarify, but it's too late. soobin has already seen the red on his face, and the look in his eyes. soobin grabs hueningkai's hands, and pulls him apart from his neck. the eye contact that is made is weak, with kai looking away every second.
"you want to be romantic?" soobin asks rhetorically, and he doesn't even wait for kai to answer his question. "we're going to be romantic in the rain then, kai-yah."
before even kai can process soobin's stupid words that make his heart flutter, he finds himself being dragged out from under the tree, into the heavy rain. it's loud and pouring real hard , and they're almost already wet. hueningkai's eyes simply widen for the moment. he blinks once and then twice, and he feels soobin's hands snake around his waist.
"hyung, no!" he whines loud and clear and if anyone was watching out of context, it would look like kai was being kidnapped. he'd gladly be kidnapped if soobin was his kidnapper. "hyung, the rain, we'll get sick-"
"shhh." soobin shushes him immediately. "if we're getting sick, we're doing it together. i'll take care of my little hueningie, don't you worry."
kai cannot even make eye contact with soobin anymore. he's so cheesy, neither of them can take it anymore. soobin himself finds the whole deal extremely amusing. he'd never think that he'd be such a disgusting sap for someone. but there's hueningkai, and when soobin's with him - he cannot think of another.
hueningkai remains speechless after soobin holds him tighter in the rain, and he presses their foreheads closer slowly. soobin controls their actions, but cannot control what he's feeling. the entire scene feels so intimate, raw and open. he feels like everything is out for kai to see here in the rain, where they're the most vulnerable. he feels closer to kai than ever before, and he looks beyond romantic love. the sheer glint in his eyes is what he wishes to be the cause of. even if soobin cannot love him, he wishes to see kai happy.
kai too looks like he's affected by the entire deal of being so close to soobin, and soobin cannot help but wish that kai feels the same amount of frustrating love that he feels towards him. soobin has him right here, kai is right in front of his eyes, yet soobin is unable to put his feelings into words.
for the first time, their eye contact is intense, and not funny. this is how soobin knows it's real. the rain makes their hair stick on their forehead, and soobin knows that he looks funny. yet, he finds kai looking at him in way which makes his insides churn.
"romantic enough for you?" soobin asks, and the only reply kai gives is a loud laughter. the moment that they built up in the past few minutes is now lighter, and soobin feels at ease. but at the same time he hopes that hueningkai felt the same. and indeed, the younger was as much confused as soobin was. after all, what was love about, if not confusion?
"i hate you." kai punches soobin's chest, and now it becomes increasingly hard for soobin to hear kai over the loud rain. the droplets fall so fast, they almost hurt. but when kai laughs and has a smile on his face, soobin feels everything else disappear. just him and kai in this entire world.
soobin drags kai further across the park, and he'd never imagined himself willingly getting wet in the rain. but if it's with kai, he'd even stand in snowfall. they run across paths in the heavy downpour, and he looks back to see kai laughing carefreely. he can't really hear him laugh because of the rain, but the sight itself makes his heart full.
when they stop under a tree on the other side of the park, there's no point anymore, because they're both completely soaked. they stop, and soobin soaks in his lucky view. he doesn't want anyone else to have this privilege. soobin watches as kai's braces peek out of his lips here at this moment. he wants to lean in, kiss, and devour him completely, but alas. he needs to stay in his limits.
despite scolding himself multiple times in his head about thinking about kissing hueningkai, soobin still seems to slip it out in words. like now. "kai-yah." he calls out, and all of a sudden, all of kai's attention is directed towards soobin. "i love these." soobin moves his hands upwards towards kai's lips, barely touching them. he stays in his limits. his fingers stop right before his lips begin. soobin gulps, and retrieves his hand instantly. but what's said is said.
he blinks obliviously, and soobin realises that he's got to spell it out to him. "your braces, cutie. i love them." his hands reach out again, but he pulls them back when he sees kai's flustered face. maybe soobin went too far. but he's here now, and kai's here now, so why not give it a shot?
"no they're not." kai disagrees instantly. "braces are not cute, hyung. they make me look ugly. or like a small kid. i don't know." he rambles out the last part, which leaves soobin in awe. who even put such things in kai's mind. he's going to fight them for it. because kai's cute braces....how could one hate them?
"no, kai...don't ever say that again." soobin sounds a little strict now, as the water drips down his face. "your braces, they're the cutest ever, okay? i wish you could stop hiding your laugh with your hand just because of your braces..."
hueningkai feels speechless, because no one has ever said anything like this to him. he's only ever got bullied for his braces, and being called cute because of his braces? was a completely new concept. fuck, he might cry. soobin was so sweet to him. he doesn't know what to do in this situation, where they're in the rain, and soobin cups his face lovingly, perfect for a kiss.
"i'm going to be straightforward, kai." soobin begins. deep breaths. "i really really want to kiss you, kai-yah." there, soobin's said it. he's got that out now, and only kai needs to approve. but seems to be the only problem for a long time.
"me too, hyung. me too, but..." kai fiddles with his wet thumbs while the rain pours outside the shade of the tree. "we should wait....wait till these are off, i promise it's not for long, hyung, i promise..."
"don't apologize, kai-yah." soobin pulls him for a hug. it's a little weird, their clothes sticking to their bodies as they hug. soobin looks kai's way once they break apart.
once again, soobin feels dejected.
four
the moment soobin sees one of the juniors put up the posters outside his classroom, he's been excited. he wants to find his boyfriend quick around the campus, but he too knows that he's going to take some time before he sees him any time soon. he knows he has a class to attend before he can get out of here. if soobin makes things quick, he can see hueningkai in the next two hours.
prom is approaching. it's obvious that soobin wants to go with hueningkai, but he wants to make the deal special. he's never seen kai with anyone else at prom so he assumes that he's never had a date to prom. like every other experience that kai has, soobin wants to make this one special.
he spends the rest of his class planning out his promposal to kai, and not paying attention at all. he gets scolded for it more than twice, but he seems to have more important things on his mind than his class. when he walks out of his class and is in full gear to get the things ready, he meets hueningkai standing there in all his glory- tall and lanky.
his hands were tucked behind his back in a clumsy attempt to hide whatever was in his hands. soobin's first instinct is to walk over and engulf him in a tight hug, but then he remembers his plan. he needs to be executing it right now, not pining over his boyfriend. but he's much too late, and hueningkai spots him standing there and smiles at him awkwardly, with his hands still behind his back.
he's hiding something, and that's all soobin can tell. he tries to look closely but he cannot make out whatever it is. from his distance, he can only see hueningkai's body slightly saying awkwardly. he raises an eyebrow and moves forward on his own, and watches his face turn redder by the passing second.
"hi." soobin greets. "what're you doing here?" soobin knows this isn't kai's building. then what would he be doing here at this hour? if he's not wrong, kai has a class in less than half an hour. he shouldn't be loitering around like this. but at the same time, soobin doesn't mind much. he's a little glad that kai has taken out the time to come see him.
"wanted to see you." kai mumbled out shyly, and soobin cannot help but ruffle his hair slightly. he laughs when he sees kai still trying to hide something behind his back.
"what's that?" soobin asks directly. "is that for me?"
"yes." he replies. kai's cheeks turn pink by now, and soobin can see clearly how much such a simple thing affects kai. he doesn't even want it to stop, because he loves cherishing the shy expression on kai's face. and he loves the fact that he's the reason of it, after all.
"do you want to show it to me?" soobin presses, and kai nods a little, before he produces a small red rose from behind his back. he holds the nimble stem in his pretty long fingers carefully, and he looks at the flower once and then up at soobin. he giggles, and then goes silent again. soobin blinks in confusion.
"hyung, i-, will you...will you go to prom with me?" he asks slowly, taking his time with every single word. soobin looks at kai and then at the flower, and then he finally realises what is happening. kai is asking him to prom. for a second, soobin is disappointed since he cannot ask kai to prom anymore, but on the second hand, he's so fucking endeared by the cuteness in kai's gesture. kai holds out the flower for soobin to accept, and he does. he takes the flower from kai's hands into his own and laughs. he laughs, because kai is so adorable, and there can be no one cuter than him ever.
"of course, kai-yah." soobin smiles at him, and then laughs. "of course i'd go with you."
and then suddenly, soobin notices the entire crowd in the corridor, and they burst into loud cheers, as hueningkai hurries to burry his face in soobin's chest. soobin gets startled, but he's happy.
prom is going to be the best with kai by his side.
|
soobin stands at the gates of his college patiently. it's almost about seven pm, and the entire place looks like a wonderland.
the once boring place is covered in decorations and lights. he looks around while passing time waiting for kai to arrive, and he realises that their budget is indeed high, and how pretty and romantic the entire place looks. he spots a familiar looking guy from his class, and remembers his name - beomgyu. he's dressed in formals like everyone else, and walks hand in hand with another boy.
while walking in, beomgyu and his date stop at where soobin stands nervously, checking his phone every passing second for a message from hueningkai. soobin has to admit, beomgyu looks gorgeous.
"hey hyung." beomgyu waves excitedly like a puppy as always. "you look great. if i didn't have a date, i'd totally hit on you." he speaks shamelessly while giggling into the hand of his date. his date, slightly taller than beomgyu himself, shoots a look a beomgyu and then sighs as if he's used to it.
"appreciate the compliment, beomgyu-yah." soobin says while he eyes the watch that rests on his wrists. "but i'm waiting on kai."
"of course." beomgyu makes a dramatic noise. "i wouldn't want you, not when i have him." he rolls his eyes at soobin playfully, and beomgyu's date clears his throat. he stretches his hand out to soobin in order to introduce himself and shake hands. "yeonjun. choi yeonjun. i don't think we've met before."
"soobin." he says back, and beomgyu watches happily as his date and his friend get along well. "have fun, you two."
"right back at ya!" beomgyu says something along those lines, and then walks away with yeonjun, telling him about two caterpillars in love. beomgyu's words do not settle in soobin's mind, but as long as they entertain yeonjun, he doesn't need to form an opinion. good for them, he guesses. he's much too impatient to see hueningkai.
"hello, stranger." a voice startles him from the back while he keeps thinking of kai. turns out it's no other than hueningkai himself. soobin turns back instantly at the familiar voice, and his face lights up in a jiffy. he finds it so pathetic how he finds himself grinning and giggling at the sight of his boyfriend.
he studies kai from head to toe subtly, and he's awed. he's not going to lie and say that he hasn't thought of what kai would look like in a suit and formals, just to be soobin's date. but he confirm one thing for sure - that he looks way better than his expectations. he has his hair done neatly for once and it's not fluffy anymore. his face looks more defined.
holy fuck. soobin thinks as he gulps. kai doesn't look cute anymore, he looks hot. his bowtie rests prettily on his collarbones, and his black suit radiates a certain aura that soobin cannot pinpoint. he's lost for words, and kai is just standing in front of him. he hasn't done anything yet. soobin doesn't think he's going to make it the night in a single piece. he's not prepared for what is yet to come.
"are you going to keep staring at me?" kai asks, and instead of a positive expression on his face, soobin notices doubt. "is there something wrong?"
"shut up, kai-yah." soobin yanks kai's hands out of the way and holds him by his arms. kai looks so matured, and soobin has never imagined a sexy side of kai. and when it's here in front of him in the flesh, he's about to cry. "you look..."
"yeah?" kai encourages an adjective, since the suspense seems to be killing him. but soobin is really lost at words.
"...good." soobin settles on that, because he isn't sure what else to say. kai looks relieved and disappointed at the same time. typical kai. no matter how sexy and mature he can look, kai is always going to remain soobin's cute baby. he cracks out into a smile at the thought.
"just good?" kai teases, and soobin is almost about to groan. "you don't want me to get started, baby. i might just lose my senses." as a response, kai just hums slowly, and rests his head against soobin's arm. he doesn't say anything for a few seconds, before he tucks his hands under soobin's. the first realisation that dawns upon soobin is that kai's hands are warm. his warms hands to heat up soobin's cold ones. he instantly locks fingers with kai, and he feels the blush creep up his face. he feels like a teenager with his crush, but when he sees a similar red on kai's cheeks, he feels better about it. maybe they're just meant to be embarrassingly in love.
"let's go in?" soobin asks over his blush, and kai simply just nods and that's about it. kai's hands in soobin's, and they walk in to the hall together, where he finds everyone with their partners, and no one else seems to take notice of anyone else but their dates. soobin plans on doing the same. his main focus is always hueningkai, anyway.
he spins kai the moment they make it to the dance floor, and earns a little yelp from the startled boy. he blinks in confusion, and soobin thinks he's going to complain about it. but soobin beats him to speaking first.
he seems to be giggling at the thought of his words already, and seeing kai's confused face makes him splatter his words out. "may i have this dance?" soobin almost falls forward while attempting to bend down gracefully. he's hoisted up by kai again, who's now convulsing with laughter.
"stop laughing, hyung, soobin hyung." kai holds up him and helps him back on his feet. soobin's hands reach up to kai's shoulder and he throws it off. soobin pouts. "why're you asking me that? of course, i'm only dancing with you. you don't need to ask, soobinnie. silly hyung."
when soobin is much too distracted to hear kai's words, he takes the reigns in his hands. he places a hand on soobin's shoulder and places one of soobin's hand on his own waist. he looks up with soobin in a way that even he cannot comprehend. but that's okay. they've got a lot of time, together. he can figure it out then. for now, he lives in the moment.
"c'mon, hyung." kai urges. "take me to dance."
soobin doesn't need to hear anything else, as he glides around sweaty people dancing with their own partners. soobin doesn't care for anyone around them, and he can barely make out who he's bumping into. his eyes are fixed on kai, and after a painful minute of eye contact, kai looks away shyly. he chews on his lip nervously, and soobin knows that isn't good for his lips. especially when he's got braces. "don't look at me like that." kai whines.
"like what?" soobin tightens the grip on kai's snatched waist. he knows that kai isn't going anywhere, but the confirmation puts soobin at ease. "like that what, kai-yah?"
"you know it." kai looks away shyly. his hands still stay on soobin's shoulder, but he thinks that they're going to slip off soon. "don't make me say it."
"can't say it?" soobin chuckles. and he's loud he knows, but the sound of the music covers his words up. no one else in the entire hall is as weird as them. and soobin loves weird. and he loves them. "shy baby."
"no,i can say it." he fights back. soobin giggles. he's ready to watch kai try. "okay then." soobin and kai are now swaying side by side alongside the others in the room. kai clings closer to soobin, and he allows. he's endeared at kai's cute mannerism even when he's dressed like a gentleman. "what does hyung look at you like?" choi soobin is an absolute tease.
"he looks at me...like i'm the prettiest." upon such words leaving his mouth, kai cannot even bring himself to look up at soobin. he's beyond embarrassed and decides on the fact that he should've just stayed silent.
"yeah?" soobin doesn't fight it. "it's true, though. you're gorgeous." soobin presses up against him and kai feels like he's losing his mind. soobin's hands find kai's and without any further words being exchanged between the two, they're dancing across the hall gracefully.
soobin didn't have the slightest idea that he could move like that, but he discovers with kai. he's going to discover more and more with kai, and he cannot wait. his hand holds kai in a way he's never thought about before. like always, no one else even matters when kai is around. it feels raw, intimate, open. free for everyone to see. for everyone to see how much soobin was gone for a particular cute boy.
they dance without words, since neither of them are brave enough to break the fragile silence and say anything. at a certain point, soobin feels his eyes turn glossy because holy fuck, he's out in the open, dancing with kai as his boyfriend. it's sincere and crazy, how much he feels for kai here, in this moment.
"can we go somewhere else, please?" kai asks slowly as he shifts unbelievably closer to soobin's ear as he whispers. "just wanna be with you." and soobin understands. he's much too nervous to be here anyway, in the fear of messing up with kai in front of hundreds. in the fear of hundred watching his most cherished moments with kai. he wants it to be only them, away from the rest of the world. soobin understands and he complies.
he grabs kai's hand and pulls him out of the hall into the back of building. he finds stairs going to the top balcony, and pulls hueningkai to the top of it. he finds kai throwing back his head and laughing at the run from the hall all the way up. soobin notices how kai stops covering his mouth most times before laughing. it makes soobin grin. he gets to see more of his braces.
they sit down for a while in absolute silence, and soobin doesn't want to anything cheesy (like, 'kai-yah, the stars are so beautiful.'), even though he wants to say it, just for the sake of seeing kai smile once again. but he just sits in silence, and they hold hands clumsily. their hands are sweaty and whole deal is extremely uncomfortable, but neither pull away for even a second. much too afraid to ruin the moment, soobin doesn't even fix the position of his wrist. he sits there in the quietness with a fast heartbeat and sweaty palms. it's calming.
"you know." soobin begins and he knows he sounds like a broken tape recorder now. but he'll take his chance, like he has all the other times before. "this is the perfect moment for a first kiss." he knows it's a joke, and kai knows it's a joke. but deep down both of them hope for it. soobin just cannot seem to convince kai that his braces is the reason soobin goes crazy for a single kiss. soobin ends it with a chuckle, so kai knows it's a joke.
"hyung-ah, don't tempt me." kai sighs deeply now. he scoots closer to soobin and rests his head on his shoulder. as if it's one of his first time realisations, kai realises that soobin's got the perfect shoulder to rest his head on. fuck. kai feels so blessed. "you know i want it as much as you do...right?"
"yeah." soobin says, and he's aware. he knows he catches kai looking down at his lips sometimes. but he's going to give kai some time for sure. he kisses kai on the cheek like he usually does, and returns back blushing at the thought of actually kissing him.
"it's not long, hyung-ah." kai reminds, and the bulb in soobin's brain lights up. how could he even forget? "i'm getting them off next week, remember?"
of course soobin remembers. there's no way in hell he's going to forget. even though kai doesn't say anything, soobin knows that kai is aware of soobin's silent countdown to next tuesday. soobin cannot absolutely wait for kai to get rid of his insecurity (which soobin loves so much, but he's willing to make only one sacrifice.) so soobin can kiss him full on the lips.
"can't wait, hyung?" kai teases, and soobin just throws himself into kai's lap in peak embarrassment.
and the answer is yes. indeed, soobin cannot wait for next tuesday.
four + one
tuesday comes by much faster than soobin expects.
he just wakes up a fine day, and he glances at his watch and realisation strikes him. oh. he thinks. today's tuesday. today's the day of great reveal. kai's getting off his braces.
he's energized almost immediately, and jumps out of bed quickly. he's sad and overly excited at the same time, since kai's braces suited him so well. he's sure kai is going to look the same levels of cute after he gets them off, but he cannot help but sulk a little. however, his eagerness out does every other emotion he feels right now. he picks up his phone off the counter, and he's more than glad to see a message from kai.
kai <3
morning hyung
got no classes today so i'll be heading to the dentist !!
i'll see you after your classes !!
soobin forgets that today is a working day and slumps back into bed at the thought of spending the whole day in college, before he can even see kai. but to get something, he's going to have to wait. soobin's not going to be greedy so soon. he's going to wait.
|
soobin watches as kai skips across the road and is moving towards him. he's spent the entire day in painful classes, and hasn't paid the slightest bit of attention anywhere. he hates himself for having such a busy schedule, but. now he's got that over with, and kai is within his eye sight. he's able to see kai and he's honestly just happy to see that. he's wearing a mask and so soobin cannot see any visible change till the time kai approaches him.
soobin is swept into a big hug by kai, and he embraces it. kai's face fits in the crook of soobin's neck and he finds it cute. kai looks up at him and even through the mask, soobin can see him smile bright. he wants to take it off already. but he doesn't want to look like a desperate fool already. so he bites the inside of his cheek in attempts to remain silent.
"hi!" kai chirps like usual. "done for the day?" he asks and soobin nods, unable to have the energy to say anything else. he just wants to rip the mask off kai's face, and kiss him square on the lips. "i got my braces off today!" kai says it like soobin doesn't know, and hasn't been thinking about it forever. "today's a good day."
kai settles his hands into soobin's and they hold it tight. they've begun to walk and kai tells him something about the process of getting them off. soobin cannot pay attention till now. he's really really going crazy.
"kai-yah." soobin stops. but he doesn't know how to say it. he doesn't want to sound weird but he's sure that it's quite evident on his face.
"hyung." kai echoes. "i'm quite surprised you haven't kissed me yet. guess all that desperation was fake after all..."
hearing kai speak like that makes soobin want to kiss him just out of spite. but he takes it slow. kai mentions a kiss and soobin sees it as a forever way ticket to kissing kai. it feels like a permission. he wants it to be a permission.
"does that mean you're allowing me to kiss you?" soobin asks for clarification and he realises that it sounds absolutely dumb. he should've phrased that better.
kai only chuckles through the damned mask. "of course, hyung. i'm even surprised that you lasted my entire story-"
and he's absolutely taken aback by soobin leaning in crazily and ripping the mask off his face. he doesn't know where he yanks it away, and frankly, that's the least of his concerns. when the mask is out of the way, soobin takes a second or two to acknowledge the absence of kai's cute little braces. he takes one look at kai's eyes which look at him in shock and understanding at the same time. and then finally soobin allows their lips to meet.
kai is stunned at the act, but soobin skillfully leads him through it. kai grips on soobin's hand immediately as if he's scared, but soon, his grip loosens, and his hands reach up to grip on soobin's t-shirt. the kiss is barely a touch of lips, but electricity flows through their veins at this simple contact.
soobin pulls away after what feels like an eternity when he realises that they're in a public place. when they pull away, kai's eyes still remain shut, and he stands like a statue. his cute mannerisms make soobin want to eat him up whole. when kai understands that it's over, he opens his eyes and takes a look at soobin's flushed face.
soobin watches as kai touches his lips with his fingers once, and then breaks out into the biggest smile ever. he looks at soobin, and soobin's a hundred percent sure that kai's going to be the death of him one day.
"that was a kiss, hyung." he states the obvious. kai's voice sounds so happy, so cheerful, that it makes soobin want to kiss him once again. and so he does. the second kiss however, is more like a kiss and kai tries to learn how it feels to be kissed by the prettiest boy in the whole universe.
their second kiss breaks apart, and soobin doesn't feel as much flustered as before. it feels like it's meant to be, now. he feels happy when it's hueningkai.
"hyung." he whines. "i'm embarrassed."
"nothing to be embarrassed of, kai-yah." soobin giggles. he places another kiss on his lips, but it's barely a peck. he's already addicted to kissing kai. "here." soobin offers his hand. "let's go."
kai holds soobin's hands, and they go, kai doesn't know where. but he's happy. happy with soobin.