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Joyce wondered at herself in her smudged bathroom mirror, staring anxiously and fussing with her hair. Tonight she was going on a totally-not-romantic-date-just-friends-dinner-date with Hopper. At Enzo’s, an upscale restaurant a town over. The kind of Midwest fancy that men proposed at and required reservations at least a few days in advance. ‘Yes totally platonic’. Joyce wouldn’t fully admit yet that she knew about Hoppers feelings and her own. She was scared.
Scratch that she is terrified. She is standing outside the brightly lit restaurant contemplating. If she goes in Hop will most definitely want to discuss ‘them’ and she will be forced to confront everything they’ve left unsaid the last 9 months. Her palms are sweating. ‘She could go back to her car and head home. Be back into the safety of her home in pajamas watching soaps. Leaving her and Hop in limbo for a while longer.
She wiped her hands on the front of her jeans. ‘Shit or get off the pot’ she thought to herself. She squared herself and headed in. ‘Totally casual, don’t sweat it. Just act normal.’ She’s led to the table and of course it’s in the middle of the restaurant. No privacy. She feels her nerves spiking again. ‘So much for not sweating’ she thinks bitterly.
But then she sees him and the stress in her body eases a touch. He looks so happy to see her. She can’t remember the last time someone was so pleased with her presence. She sits and smooths her shirt down.
“Hey” he’s smiling so big
“Hey” she replied, her voice sounding weak to her own ears.
“Are you wanting any wine?”
“Wine?” She asks
“Well, yeah you can’t celebrate without wine! I was thinking a nice Che-ant-e.”
“Key-auntie” she laughs. His eyes crinkle in humor.
“Chianti right.”
“Wines good” she tells him. Their easy rapport is slowly easing her. Her mind quiets a little. He orders the bottle from the waiter, who is dressed so nicely that she feels a little underdressed in her collared blouse and jeans.
“Try the breadsticks. They put a spice on them. They’re to die for.” He pushes them towards her. “Dip them in the olive oil. Best way to eat them.”
“You been here a lot?”
“Uhhh not too often, just a few times.” He is quieter and turns a little pink. ‘Dates’ she thinks. He never talks about it and she’s never asked. She’s heard the rumors around their small town. The awkward tension is broken by the waiter returning with their bottle. As he pours the wine out she tries the breadsticks. ‘Oh god that’s good’ she makes a low mmmm. Hops eyes are back on her.
“Are we ready to order?” The waiter asked. ‘Henry’ the name tag read.
“Well Mr.Expert, what’s the best on the menu?” He perks up at her question.
“The veal and the lasagna are my favorites. I always have trouble deciding.”
“Oooo lasagna. It’s been so long since I’ve had any. I’ll take that please.” She smiles and hands the leather bound menu to Henry. Hopper decided on the veal.
“Can’t get the same as you.” He turned back towards her and winked. They drank and talked about their day as they waited on their entrees. They were both 2 glasses deep when the dishes arrived and Hopper asked for another bottle.
“Should we really get another?” She points out that they have to drive home.
“We’re celebrating remember? Let’s live a little!” He’s giving her that boyish grin that she’s always liked. Makes her feel young and reckless like they were in high school.
“I think I’ve only made lasagna once since the boys were little….. Do you think El has ever had it?”
“We’ve had some microwave lasagna before.”
“Hopper that doesn’t count! You have to stop feeding her that stuff. It’s not good for her, or for you.” She chastises him
“Well it’s hard sometimes. I don’t have the best cooking abilities and the kid would eat eggos most meals if I let her.” He laughs.
“Well bring her around for dinner sometime. Maybe on one of my days off I can brush off my grandmas cookbook. I’m positive I’ve got it somewhere in my hall closet, or maybe a kitchen cabinet. I don’t know.” Hoppers eyes narrow a bit.
“Are you going to stick around long enough for us to do that?” She feels like her heart is tensing and she can’t breathe. It had been going so well. She takes a big sip of her wine.
“You want to talk about this now, again?”Another sip. God it was some amazing wine. Way better than the $2 bottles she gets from the liquor mart.
“Yes.” He just stares at her.
“I think it would be best for the kids.” She defends
“I don’t think so. I think you’re going to take them away from their support system. Away from the people that understand what messed up stuff they’ve been through.” She feels anger start to trickle through her.
“Why do you care?” She huffs out. ‘Oh no why did I say that?’ She isn’t sure she’s ready for the answer to come. ‘Damn mouth running away from my brain’
“I think you know why.” He answers giving her a look. ‘No’ she thinks ‘I’m going to make him say it’ because she will be damned before she admits anything first.
“Maybe I don’t. Enlighten me.” Old habits die hard and living with Lonnie had taught her to never give any information before he did. They sit in silence for a moment and take a few bites before Hopper wipes his mouth and takes a sip of wine.
“I care about you Joyce, and the boys. El does too and I don’t want her losing any more people that she cares about.” Joyce’s stomach is turning.
“So it’s all because of El?”
“Of course not! Jesus Joyce. Maybe a little bit is for El but mostly it’s because I’m selfish and I don’t want to let you go. I was so terrified when I found out you were fixing up the house to sell.” He staring at her and she is overwhelmed and wishes she could look away.
“Because I’m selfish and afraid Joyce. We’ve been through so much in the last few years and I thought I was losing my chance. That you would slip through my fingers again. I was trying to respect your grieving. Not push too fast and scare you off. But then you go off doing something unexpected and I’m scrambling after you like always. I had to carefully ask you on this date!” He’s out of breath by the end eyes expressive with hurt, hope and anger.
“So this was a date.” She states not really asking.
“Are you going to run away if it is?” He asks disappointed. She studies him for a moment. Realizing he was in a new shirt. It was pink with leaves. He definitely looked like magnum pi but she would save that realization for later. He bought a new shirt, asked her on a date; to a nice restaurant no less, and got her favorite type of wine. When was the last time someone had put any effort into impressing Joyce Byers? She felt heady and amazed at the thought of him going through so much for her.
“I’ll make my decision after dessert.” She says as flirty as she can taking a sip of her wine. She wasn’t ready to confess but the wine made her comfortable enough to open up in this way at least.
“Dessert?” Hop questioned. That definitely wasn’t the answer he was expecting.
“Yeah, I’ll hold out my judgments until after desert. Get the full experience.” She smiled at him and rubbed her foot along his ankle. Which wasn’t hard considering his long legs reached onto her side anyway. He looked dazed for a moment and then smiled back.
When Henry came back around to offer dessert Joyce spoke first, placing a hand on Hoppers.
“Just a box and the check please.” Hop was puzzled
“I thought we *were* doing dessert?”
“We are, I didn’t say we were doing dessert here.” His smile became even bigger.
“Your place or mine?” He whispers.
“Well I have peach pie and a pint of vanilla ice cream from that new place at the mall. You got something at yours that can beat that?” He leans in closer his hand engulfing hers.
“Yours sounds perfect.” The waiter returns and they lean back. As they leave, Joyce has her leftovers in hand and Hopper keeps his hand firmly on her back on the way to her car.
Joyce leans against the drivers door and fidgets with her keys.
“See you in 25.”
He steps closer. “I could turn the cop lights on-make it 10.”
“Someone’s eager for something sweet.” She giggles. He takes a final step into her space. She has to lean her head back to keep eye contact.
“You have no idea.” He runs a finger down her arm and gives her a hand a quick squeez. “See you soon Joyce. I’ll follow you.” He turns and heads to his blazer a few spots down. Her head swam and it took a moment for her to get her bearings. Shaking the fogginess out she gets into her car and begins the drive back to her house. More nervous, confused, and excited than she was when she left her house.