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The waves and tides rose then ebbed. Seagulls were flying above them, chasing each other, and half-dipping their feet into the seawater. It was 06:00 AM, we were strolling around the coast. The cold air hit our faces as we walked farther due west. There were only two of us at the beach. I flicked the button of my black Kodak and captured the scenery of the calm ocean. Sun was shining so brightly this morning, warming our cold bodies.
All of a sudden, the cold seawater was splashed on my face. I could hear a mischievous laugh from where I was standing. She ran away from me with a big smile and her long black hair was blown by the breeze.
It was magnificent.
My fingers quickly flicked the camera anew, and captured the moment as fast as I could, afraid of losing it.
Afterward, I chased and caught her in a big hug from behind.
“Ahahaha…Brian, wait. There’s sand on your face.” Summer said between her laugh as she stared at my face. I ignored it and only sunk my face deeper into her neck while she tried to reach my face.
“Bri…the sand might hurt your eyes. Let me wipe it off” she said, her voice full of concern.
“Said the one who splashed the water right onto my face” I chaffed, still not moving from her neck and still avoiding her hands.
Summer snorted, pulled my face close to hers, and wiped the sand from my face with an annoyed look.
“You could have wiped it off before taking a picture and chasing me. Anyway, why did you bring the analog and not the DSLR? The latter one won’t be such a hassle when you take the picture.” she scolded me as we continued our stroll around the coast.
The shore started to fill with people, some prepared themselves for sunbathing and the rest enjoyed the scenery—like us.
“Well, the result is different from the digital, I like the analog better. It produces more beautiful color… somehow softer and…” I trailed off and stared at her
“…And???” she asked again impatiently while glancing at me with furrowed eyebrows.
“You look prettier in the 35mm analog. Ethereally.”
She diverted her eyes from my gaze. Her cheeks were burning red, and she shyly smiled.
“You’re so lame, duh!”
“I am lame enough to make you smile then. Apart from that, it’s a fact though.” I teased her
She only rolled her eyes and laughed. We continued our walk until she grabbed my wrist and pointed her index finger at the stairs to the sloping hill.
“I bet the view from up there is prettier” with an excited tone she said to me.
Then, she led our way to the green hill. When we finally reached the peak, Summer immediately went to the coin binoculars while I sat down on the wooden bench behind her.
I capture some pictures of the beach with my camera. Summer was right, the beach was more beautiful from up here. The asters were spreading out, forming a flowerbed surrounding the shore. Two stone cliffs stood gallantly, adjacent to the purplish flowerbed. Waves chased each other and subsided as they crashed into the breakwaters.
“Summer” I called her, trying to get her attention
“Hmm” she hummed without turning her back, engrossed with the binoculars.
“Look at here, please, just for a moment,” I begged her
Summer turned her head and looked at me. I swiftly pressed my camera button and captured the lovely woman in front of me.
Oh Lord, how she never ceases to amaze me, even amid this breathtaking view?
Summer then sat on my left side, her eyes focused on the calm sea below, entertained by the view. I tucked the strands of her hair that were being blown by the breeze, blocking her vision. She slowly faced me and looked at me endearingly.
Why do her starry eyes always catch me off guard?
I stared deeply at her eyes, then at her plump lips. Slowly closed the gap between us and pressed my lips on hers. Summer closed her eyes, her fingers found their way to my hair, pulled me closer, and deepened the kiss. Our lips moved in sync with our heads tilted from left to right.
Then, she broke the kiss and lingered her eyes on mine. Her hands cupped my face, caressed my cheeks, and
She pecked my lips
She kissed my nose
“I love you” she whispered with her sweet smile
“I love you too, Summer”
We spent the next hour on the hill talking about so many things, Summer snuggled up to me and circled her hand around my waist. Never wanting to let go of me.
What should we eat for lunch?
Mmm, let’s eat hamburgers. By the way, we’re so far from the hotel, I’m extremely tired. Give me a piggyback ride to the hotel, Bri. Pweaseeee
Noooo, you’re the one who asked to go up here.
Or
What will our future house look like, Bri?
Will we move out of Toronto, Summer?
Bri, in 5 years, do you still love me?
Now, I am in the attic of my childhood house, among the dusty stacks of cardboard boxes. My mom asked me to tidy up and sort out the junk this morning; her Marie Kondo spirit is awake.
After two hours of separating the clutters, I see a box with my name written on it. Curious about what’s inside it, I break the scotch tape and open the box. There are an old Kodak camera, Kodak Colorplus 200 film refills, and a brown photo album.
I sit cross-legged and then leaf through the album. Laughing at the photo from my freshman and sophomore years. Reminiscing the memories that I almost forget,
‘Oh simple thing, where have you gone?’
The moment I almost reach the end page, I abruptly stop flipping the pages when seeing a woman's portrait. Thin smile forms on my lips and my fingers carefully stroke the picture.
“You were so beautiful that day...and will always be,” I whisper say to myself in a low voice.
My eyes move to the next pictures; two beautiful ocean sceneries and a photo wherein Summer was running alongside the seashore.
She looked so cheerful and free that day.
I let out a sharp sigh. The memories of us lazing around the beach emerge from the back of my mind. My vision becomes blurry, I can feel tears slowly forming at the brink of my eyes.
It has been 5 years since Summer left me.
“How are you, Summer?” my lungs start to feel heavy
“Do you still miss me? Do you still love me?”
“I want to see you again. I miss the way your fingers run through my hair, the way your eyes smile whenever laughing at my lame jokes. I miss your voice when you whispered ‘I love you'. I want to see you scrunch your nose. Wait for you at the altar, while you walk down the aisle in a wedding dress. We cook our breakfast together and take care of our kids. We grow old tog—”
I cry harder as my voice cracks while saying those, unable to continue the sentences. Trying to catch my breath and calm myself down.
After 10 minutes of pouring my heart, I feel better and gain some courage to speak again,
“I know those are all merely wishful thinking. I hope you’re always happy, wherever you are. And no longer feeling the pain.”
I hug my legs and stare at the ceiling,
“I hope you’re happy above the clouds, Summer,” I added dolefully
With that, I take her photo, close the album, and put the album back in the box.
I’ll keep your portrait in my room as a keepsake for our love
Unfortunately, losing someone you’re deeply in love with is indeed part of life’s rich tapestry.
It’s an honor to ever be part of your life even just for a very short time, Summer.