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Let’s get this over with.
Saiki picked up a pencil and stared down the test sheet. The plan was simple as always. All he had to do was discern the right answer from the chorus of thoughts, and occasionally deviate from it.
That was how most tests went, anyhow.
There was no chorus today, only the scattered thoughts of the substitute proctor and students lingering about the school, none of which were thinking about the test he currently had to take.
Thanks to the hapless tendencies of his father, Saiki had missed school for a day, an important test day at that, and was spending the next afternoon making up for it. The one good thing to the ordeal was that the proctor had chased away his classmates trying to drag him into walking home with them. Even with godly psychic abilities, he could rarely avoid their insistent demands.
Saiki suddenly heard the proctor thinking, Why hasn’t that student written anything yet? Does he not know the material? Maybe he needs to make up more than a test.
Saiki immediately wrote down a random answer to calm the proctor’s suspicions. Needing to take on extra work or tutoring would only make him stand out, and he’d have to deal with more people in his life.
He answered the next few randomly as well, until the proctor’s thoughts drifted to unrelated mundanity. Saiki then lifted his eyes a smidge, peering into the desk with his x-ray vision. Even without classmates spouting the solutions, he could easily pass the test exactly how he wanted to.
The teacher always keeps the answer key in this drawer... what!? It’s not there!
Of course, Saiki checked all the other drawers and his classmates’ desks as well, but there wasn’t an answer key aside from one corresponding to a future test the class would be taking in two weeks. How useless.
There was still another avenue to getting the answer key, so Saiki wasn’t about to begin panicking for no reason.
Listening in to the proctor again, Saiki retrieved some useful info. Why am I wasting my time with this kid? There’s nothing to even do here since his teacher took all the class stuff down to the offices.
Since Saiki had never seen the answer key before, he couldn’t use his clairvoyance on it, but he was aware of other class objects. Looking back down at his poorly-filled sheet, he crossed his eyes and searched... and along with the objects, found his teacher’s belongings laying around.
And in those belongings were several sheets of paper, one of which had to be the answer sheet.
Unfortunately for Saiki again, the scene became utter chaos when a person tripped into view and spilled their coffee everywhere. The dark liquid spread quickly while the person was recovering from their fall, and by the time the papers were back in view, all Saiki could read was a single line on one paper: Answer Key.
If only he were in the office, he could turn back time on the paper.
Saiki watched the scene for a little longer, certainly not from a speck of desperation, but the person merely crumpled the stained papers and tossed them away, constantly scanning for a witness to their tragic mistake. Tragic only for Saiki, if he couldn’t find another way to get the answers. Relying on his own knowledge for a test was too risky.
There was one more ability he could try. Psychometry. Keeping his movements inconspicuous, Saiki partially removed his thin glove on his dominant hand and touched his sheet of paper.
The vision started in the office, where the paper was being printed into a stack. There was background conversation, but Saiki surveyed over what was in view, fully concentrated on the words Answer Key. He failed after three attempts, two of which were unnecessary but perhaps that speck of desperation was bigger than he thought.
Back in reality, Saiki’s brow was furrowed deeper than usual. Taking the actual test would be easier at this point, but that would not achieve his goal. In his frustration, he forgot his gloves were still off when he touched the desk by accident. He was prepared to see an empty desk crowded by his friends wondering where he had gone for the day, but then he remembered...
Saiki wasn’t sitting at his desk. Because the proctor wasn’t his actual teacher, they hadn’t known which seat was whose, and Saiki had chosen a random seat near the front. And he so happened to be sitting in Kaidou’s seat, and so happened to see Kaidou while he was taking the test.
Finally, some good fortune. Kaidou may be delusional most times, but he averages around 90% for every test. His tests are practically the same as an answer key! However, I should be careful and copy more than I normally would, because some of them will already be incorrect.
Twenty minutes later, Saiki wore the glove back over his hand and turned in his test. With that over, he was able to walk home without so much as a pebble out of place, and spent the rest of the day peacefully by himself. It felt a little too good, if he was being honest, as though a string of bad luck would be waiting for him.
No, he was probably overreacting. It was just that he didn’t get days like this very often. Yes, that had to be it...
On his usual route to class, Saiki knew there would be a crowd of students clamoring to see the results now that everyone had taken the test. Since he already knew around where he placed, Saiki remained in the back of the crowd, waiting for Nendou or Kaidou to inevitably rope him into comparing their scores.
“Wow, Kaidou! You placed an impressive 25th this time!” Hairo shouted, with a congratulatory grin and a thumbs-up for his high-scoring classmate.
Kaidou smirked, clenching his fist dramatically and turning the air around him purple—no, that was simply his imagination leaking into Saiki’s vision. “Of course it’s impressive to you , but as the Jet Black Wings, I am knowledgeable on all subjects. You can never predict how the Dark Reunion will attack, so I must stay prepared for any situation!” Saiki could tell the group had stopped listening after ‘the.’ Plus, Kaidou’s thoughts were of a different disposition: Only 25!? Mom’s not going to be happy with that! I should have studied harder instead of writing scenarios...
Farther down the crowd, Saiki heard another train of thought.
154th... if I want to get back on the right path of life, I have to study harder!
“Hey, Kuboyasu,” Hairo called to the aspiring former punk. “It’s not about the number, so long as you put everything you’ve got into it!”
They why did you praise Kaidou for his 25 rank earlier, Saiki thought sardonically. He cast a glance towards the middle and sighed in relief, seeing Satou at 90th as always. Saiki could not say the same for himself, as he wasn’t adjacent in 89th or 91st. Most likely because I had to rely on Kaidou instead of an actual answer key.
Turning back to the group, he saw Kaidou slam Kuboyasu on the shoulder, which was really a great imitation of a feather to a rock, and say, “Aren, if you are dedicated to the path of knowledge and preparation for the Dark Reunion’s schemes, I will aid you in your quest!” At Kuboyasu’s confused reaction, Kaidou stuttered, “I-I mean, I’ll tutor you! I scored 25th, after all!”
“I’m grateful, Shun. I’ll be sure to improve to make sure your efforts aren’t wasted,” Kuboyasu promised. “We can—”
“No way!” A deep shout cut through what would have been Kuboyasu proposing that he and Kaidou hang out if he managed to improve.
At the end of the board, Nendou was excitedly jabbing at his poor placement. “Look at this: 180th!”
Kaidou snorted, “You’re celebrating over 180? I suppose it is an achievement to go up, but it’s only by 1 spot.”
“But that means there’s someone... dumber than Nendou!” Kuboyasu said. That had even Saiki’s curiosity piqued.
They watched Nendou move his hand to reveal the 181st rank, and...
What!?
“Saiki!?” Kaidou, Kuboyasu, Hairo all yelled at once.
“That’s a weird spot for you, isn’t it pal?” Nendou laughed ignorantly.
Not weird—impossible!
“SAIKI!” The voice of Mr. Matsuzaki boomed over the cries and rampaging thoughts of disbelief from his classmates. “I didn’t expect this from you. You will see me afterschool about your behavior. Don’t be late! I will not tolerate slacking off from you anymore!”
You never did before. But this is bad. Everyone around is now looking at me. I can hear their thoughts.
Saiki is 181st? I don’t know his normal rank, but that can’t be right!
Saiki did worse than Nendou? No wonder Mr. Matsuzaki had to step in.
Saiki is the dumbest student, heh? Teruhashi will surely see him for the lowlife he is now!
That last one was definitely a Kokomin, though Saiki hoped he was actually right about Teruhashi. Regardless, he had to do something about his score before he stood out even more, and he had to figure out why his score was so low if Kaidou’s was comparatively high.
The latter didn’t take very long. A stray thought informed him that the answers he’d copied was to one of those phony personality tests, and Kaidou had taken it secretly during class using an extra answer sheet. While one could argue Saiki should have been more observant, he would counter What kind of personality test has the exact same number of questions and answer options as a school exam? It was the kind of coincidence that could only be manufactured by... good grief.
I almost can’t believe God answered my prayer, but since it’s me, of course he did! Now Saiki will need a tutor, and as the highest scoring student in our class, Mr. Matsuzaki will assign me to tutor him. This is the perfect opportunity to be alone with Saiki! And when he achieves a high score, he will say “Oh wow, Teruhashi is the best! I’ll never get anywhere in life without her!”