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Tal could feel his eyes drooping, his body practically begging him to sleep, but he refused.
It had been almost a month since Zeph and her crew kidnapped him; almost a month of rigorous work he was never prepared for, a month of scowls and barely concealed whispers behind his back, almost a month of living in that crowded cell, of never getting enough sleep or food to heal properly, and Tal was sick of it.
Every day it felt more and more hopeless to keep concealing his powers. Why should he? Did his family even notice his disappearance? Were they even getting his messages? Was Zeph right? Had they forgotten about him, moved on to greener pastures? Maybe they took this opportunity to get rid of the most troublesome prince, a stain on their lineage.
But no, that wasn’t right. His family loved him, they only kept him in the castle for his own safety, not because they were ashamed of him. His family loved him, despite the magic, surely. They sent him out on his coming-of-age tour because they were proud of him and trusted him.
Right?
Or maybe it had been a ploy.
Maybe my family set me up, Tal thought, delirious with pain and hunger, they wanted to get rid of me.
Tal couldn’t differentiate between his paranoia-fueled thoughts and reality anymore, all he knew was he was here suffering, alone, and his family hadn’t come for him yet.
Maybe Zeph was right.
If his family wasn’t coming to save him, what was he doing this all for? What was the point, when in a couple of days, Zeph would kill him regardless? Why was he concealing his powers again?
He couldn’t recall.
Tal didn’t want to sleep, because sleeping was somehow even worse than his waking thoughts, but his body refused to listen to him as he fell forwards onto the floorboards, passing out.
-
He woke up in a dream.
Tal knew it was a dream because even though he was still in the godforsaken ship, still in the fucking cell, Kest was before him.
“Tally,” Kest whispered, crouching down and trying to hold Tal through the bars. His face was split in grief and worry, which further cemented the fact Tal was dreaming. Kest didn’t really care about him, but it was nice to think he did.
“Kest?” Tal tried to say, but his mouth refused to cooperate and it ended up just sounding like a moan of pain. Tears were quickly filling his eyes; even in his dreams he can’t be healthy?
“Tally,” Kest breathed, “Tally, you’re alive.”
And then Kest was pulling him through the bars, into a hug, and oh, this was nice. Tal almost wished the real Kest was here to do this, but dream-Kest was nice too.
“Kest,” Tal said, for real this time, sobbing shamelessly. Who was going to judge him? “Are you real?”
And dream-Kest, like a good actor, nodded his head frantically against the bars, “Yes, I swear, it’s me.”
This was a nice dream; Tal would like to never wake up thank you.
“Shh,” dream-Kest was saying, petting Tal fruitlessly through the bars as he sobbed. “I’m here, I’m here. Garrett’s ship is over the horizon. He’ll be here by sunrise.”
Tal startled at the words, looking up at dream-Kest as he tried to pull away. Dream-Kest’s hold only grew stronger.
That couldn’t be right. Garrett coming wasn’t something Tal would ever think of, he had exhausted that line of thinking weeks ago. Garrett wasn’t coming. Why was dream-Kest lying to him? He’s just supposed to be his hair and then disappear in the morning.
“Tally?” dream-Kest was saying, worrying clear in his eyes as he cupped Tal’s cheek. “What’s wrong? Oh, what have they done to you?”
This was wrong, why wasn’t the dream following the script? Kest wasn’t supposed to offer Tal freedom, not with an actual, tangible plan. What was going on?
“Can you run?” fake-Kest was saying, looking more and more concerned by the minute. Maybe Tal should just humor his subconscious? He had nothing better to do.
“Yes,” he found himself saying, “yes, I can run. I can break the lock and we can go. They have jolly boats at the stern. We’ll row.” There. Now he had done his part in adding to his fever-filled dream plan. Now they could go back to hugging and Tal could pretend this was real again.
But fake-Kest started frowning. “There are sailors on the deck.”
And ugh who cared? “I’ll just kill them,” he said flippantly, ignoring fake-Kest’s look of surprise and horror. “I can just use magic and we can escape and—”
Footsteps were sounding above them, coming closer to the ladder. And no, no, no, actually, Tal didn’t want this dream to end just yet. The plan they had made wasn’t actually bad, maybe he could sleep longer and see it play out, pretend to have freedom for just a second.
But fake-Kest was standing up, looking over at the ladder, leaving him. “Someone is coming.”
“Don’t—”
“Garret is nearby, and now that we know your exact location, he’ll be here soon,” fake-Kest was saying, moving towards the window, moving aware from Tally, and no no no the dream wasn’t over what was he doing— “Hand on for a few more hours, Tally.”
Hang on? Hang on? “Don’t leave me,” Tal begged as fake-Kest moved away, “You can’t leave me!”
He threw himself on the bars, bruising his skin and definitely opening up old scabs, but Kest was still leaving him.
Kest was saying something, tears crowding his eyes, but Tal couldn’t hear him. All he could hear was rushing water in his ears, his breaths coming in fast and painfully. He saw Kest transform into a bird and fly away, as Rot descended down the ladder.
And suddenly Tal realized he wasn’t in a dream, he hadn’t been in a dream. Kest had been here and he left him—
He left him even after seeing the state Tal was in—
It wasn’t a dream—
And he still left—
And as Rot came to stand in front of his cell, something in Tal broke. He couldn’t tell what, but suddenly, Rot wasn’t there anymore, and cell bars were melting in front of him.
Tal blinked and the ship started on fire.
He couldn’t do this anymore.
Stepping over Rot’s ashes, Tal made his way slowly up the ladder to the deck of the ship. He saw Zeph walking around, so smug and sure of herself as she turned to him.
“Is he ready, Rot? It’s time we figured out—”
She stopped when she saw Tal, eyes growing wide with shock. Tal couldn’t even parse the expression on her face before he was seeing red.
It was her fault; it was all her fault!
He jumped on her, hands going up to her neck to strangle her. They tumbled down onto the deck, rolling around as Zeph fought back. Bitch! he thought, or maybe screamed, it was hard to tell. Tal distantly noted the fires that were raging around them both, consuming the wooden ship easily. He could hear the screams of terror from the sailors, them trying to control the flames, but it was in vain. Nothing could stop Tal now.
Smoke raised to the sky, a beacon that no one would heed, because they were alone in the middle of the fucking ocean and Tal was done. No one was going to help him.
Zeph was screaming beneath him, writhing as he cut off her airflow. She fumbled for her sword and stabbed Tal in the shoulder before he could react, but instead of letting her go, he just crushed her neck harder.
Her eyes rolled to the back of her head, mouth foaming, but Tal wasn’t’ satisfied. He grabbed the sword stuck in his shoulder and pulled, not even caring about the blood flowing from the wound. He raised the sword up, relishing in the burn the action caused, and stabbed Zeph.
She choked up blood but didn’t move.
Zeph blinked blearily at him and scoffed, “Just like your grandfather.” She spat blood on his face and her head fell to the floor with a bang. Dead.
Tal numbly reached up to his face and wiped the blood off. He looked around him and saw chaos and destruction and he finally understood his grandfather.
Tal felt like he was drunk as he stood up, turning around in circles as he took in the pandemonium around him. He laughed, and then couldn’t stop laughing as people screamed as they burned alive, or jumped in the ocean to try and escape him.
He got it now; this rush of power and adrenaline was like nothing he’d ever felt before and Tal decided he liked it.
He thought he saw a bird off in the distance, desperately flying towards him, but Tal didn’t care anymore.
He took a deep breath and let the world burn.