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"I don't know why we thought this would be a fun trip," Ethan grumbled as they walked through the front gates of the zoo. "Every time we go anywhere, I always get stuck having to rein in Al and Chris's stupidity."
"Oh, calm down," Silena said. "I'm sure they can behave themselves for one day. Right boys?" She flashed the two trouble makers in question a brilliant pearly white smile. Silena was undeniably the most excited about the zoo trip. She currently wore a sparkly cat ear headband and had her phone out, ready for her usual aesthetic photos and selfies.
Ethan wouldn't pretend he didn't enjoy the zoo under normal circumstances. He liked animals, and he liked reading the facts on the signs about them. However, being here with Alabaster Torrington and Chris Rodriguez was a different matter entirely. It had been decided that Ethan was indisputably the one on the team with the most braincells, or at least the one who most consistently used them. As such, whenever Alabaster and Chris started being their usual idiotic selves, it was Ethan's job to make sure they didn't hurt themselves or anyone else.
"No promises," Chris said, then immediately he and Alabaster ran over to the mountain goat exhibit, bumping each other playfully like they were going to knock the other into the enclosure. Ethan gave a primal sigh.
"I better go make sure they don't fall in," he said. "You and Luke got the ticket process."
"Yeah, sure," Luke said, glancing at the mountain goats. "Thalia always admired mountain goats for being able to live up so high." Ethan sighed and ran off after Alabaster and Chris. A bump from Chris almost actually sent Alabaster over the edge. The two laughed stupidly.
"I seriously need to invest in a couple of those child leashes for you two," he sighed. "At least Luke and Silena never do stuff like this."
"That's because Silena's a girl, and Luke doesn't know how to have fun," Chris said.
"No, it's because they aren't idiots like you two," Ethan said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "And what does Silena being a girl have to do with anything?"
"Girls usually aren't as reckless as guys," Alabaster said.
"Yeah, well I'm a guy, and I'm not reckless."
"You sure about that?" Alabaster said, pointing to Ethan's eyepatch.
"Okay, you are on thin ice," Ethan said. "I told Silena I didn't want to come if it meant I have to babysit you the whole time. So I'm about five seconds from leaving."
"No ditching!" Silena said. She'd come back with the tickets and had her phone held up, snapping a quick picture of the three. "Say zoo!"
"Silena, we're not five years old," Ethan muttered.
"I am mentally," Chris volunteered. "And are you sure about that?" He held a hand above Ethan's head to demonstrate Ethan's short height. Ethan shot a nervous look to Silena. Help me, his face pleaded.
"All right," Silena said. "Come on, let's go." Alabaster bumped Chris again and then followed Silena through the official entrance.
"Ethan, look." Alabaster pointed to a sleeping black bear as they crossed the bridge over the bear enclosure. "It's you."
"How so?" Ethan was used to Alabaster's shenanigans by now.
"You know. It's a black bear, and you wear a lot of black and have black hair."
"That's probably your dumbest reason yet," Ethan said. At least when Alabaster and Chris pointed to some kind of garbage can or bag and told the other "hey look, it's you," that was kind of funny. This was just dumb.
"Hey, look," Ethan said, feeling utterly done.
"What?" Alabaster asked. Ethan pointed to the rock the bear was sleeping on.
"It's you." It was intended to be a joke on Alabaster's name, which he shared with a type of rock, but the son of Hecate just smirked and raised an eyebrow.
"Does that mean you want to nap on top of me?" Ethan's face burned.
"No, it's- just forget I said anything." Alabaster grinned and ran ahead after Chris. Ethan sighed heavily and walked after them.
"Silena," he grabbed her arm as he passed. "Please, save me. I don't want to babysit Al and Chris this whole time, can you possibly get them for just a little bit?"
"I suppose," Silena said. "After all, this trip is supposed to be enjoyable for everyone, and it's not going to be for you if you're wrangling those two all day."
"Thank you," he breathed. "You're my hero, seriously."
"Yeah, sure," she laughed. Clutching her phone in her hand and started walking ahead to catch up to Al and Chris.
***
With Silena wrangling the idiots for a while, Ethan had more time to take each exhibit in and actually read the information on the signs. Unlike Silena, he wasn't much for cute selfies and aesthetic photography, but he did occasionally take out his phone to snap a quick photo of particular things on the signs he found interesting.
"All right," Silena muttered, fixing her cat ears, which had somehow become tangled in her usually perfect hair. She pointed to Alabaster and Chris, who currently stood in the giant fake eagle's nest, trying to flap and caw louder than the other to assert dominance. "Luke, it's your turn to babysit those two."
"Why me?" Luke protested.
"Because you're the oldest, and Ethan and I have both done it already."
"Fine," Luke said. "You two, get out of there right now! That's for kids. You guys are sixteen and eighteen."
"You say that like it's going to make a difference to them," Ethan muttered. He reached into his backpack and pulled out an energy drink. "This is going to be a long day."
"You got that right," Silena said, slipping her hairbrush out of her own backpack. Silena never went anywhere without a hairbrush, which was something Ethan really didn't understand. Personally, he couldn't care less about his appearance. She brushed her hair back down and repositioned her headband. "There we go."
Chris and Alabaster had reluctantly agreed to get out of the eagle's nest. They kept walking until they got to the river otters.
"Oh... my... gods!" Silena squealed, bouncing up and down on her heels. The otters were tumbling through the water, playing. "They're so cute!" Ethan put a hand on her shoulder.
"Okay, but could you maybe squeal a little quieter?"
"Sorry," she said. After watching the otters play for a while, they walked to the next hallway. Small terrariums with lizards and snakes in them lined the wall. They all noticed it- Luke trying to act like he didn't hesitate and take a step back when he saw the reptiles.
"Don't be a sissy," Alabaster told him. "They're just small snakes."
"I'm not," Luke said. "I'm fine."
"Yeah," Chris said, bumping his half-brother. "Right." Luke rolled his eyes as they walked through the exhibit. Silena grinned and snapped a picture of the two.
"Cute sibling moment!"
"Yeah," Ethan chuckled with a sly grin. "Adorable."
"Shut up, Ethan Luke said.
"Shut up, Ethan!" Chris mocked in a whiny tone, pouting his lip. Luke whacked him on the back of the head. "I do not sound like that! Let's move on."
"DUCKS!" Chris yelled as they walked out of the snake hallway to find a little fenced-off lake teeming with all kinds of waterfowl.
"Chris, we just saw ducks," Luke said. "They were back with the beavers. It's not that exciting."
"I should have brought bread!" Chris said.
"No, you shouldn't have," Silena said. "Bread isn't good for ducks."
"I still like ducks," Chris said, standing right next to the wooden rail. Alabaster came running at him, bodyslamming him in the side.
"Gotcha!" Chris caught himself on the railing. Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Oh my gods, you two. You'd better stop that or you're going to get us all kicked out, like you do literally every place we go."
"He's got a point," Luke said. "You got us kicked out of the beach, Chris. That doesn't happen."
"So what I'm hearing is that we're trailblazers," Chris said.
"Well then, you need to get your ears checked," Ethan said. "Please, guys. Luke, Silena and I would like to actually enjoy the zoo, so if you two could just reign in your crap for a few hours-"
"No promises," Chris said with a lopsided grin. "Hey, water break?"
"If you mean drinking break, then yes."
"What else would I mean?" Chris said. "Actually... don't finish that thought." Ethan rolled his eye.
"Let's just keep going before the two of you wear my patience any thinner. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry, it's a good thing I can't be bothered most of the time."
"I don't like you now," Alabaster interjected.
"Liar," Silena said with a grin, holding up her phone to snap a picture of Alabaster's indignant expression.
"I am not!" he protested.
"Sure," Chris said. "If you don't like him, then why do you have three pictures of him in your room?"
"One of which," Luke interjected, "is labeled best boy ever in black sharpie?"
"Shut up!" Alabaster said, whacking Luke in the arm with his plastic water bottle.
"Fine, be that way, don't admit it," Silena said. "Let's keep going." She pulled out her own water bottle. She had mixed in a pink lemonade-flavored electrolyte packet. They kept walking to the cougars. The two large cats were curled up next to each other asleep. Silena bounced up and down on her heels. "They're so cute! They're just like big cats!" The corner of Ethan's mouth twitched up in a half smile.
"Yeah." Most people wouldn't have assumed it from looking at him, but Ethan liked animals a lot. Most of the time he got along with them easier than people. But he especially liked cats, the domestic ones and the wild ones. Silena snapped a picture.
"I'm posting this," she grinned. "How's cat nap for a caption?"
"Too punny for me, but go for it," Ethan said.
"Wow, Ethan," Chris said. "A lovely, sunny day, and you still have absolutely no sense of humor."
"I have a sense of humor," Ethan said flatly. "I just don't think puns are funny."
"Well, I'm posting it anyway," Silena said, straightening her headband, then looking at the map in her hand. "What's next?"
"California condors," Ethan read.
"Condors?" Chris asked. "What are those?"
"They're a type of vulture," Ethan said. Silena's face turned pale.
"Vultures? Maybe I'll stay back from this one. I get squeamish around dead things."
"Silena, you're a demigod," Luke said. "I think you can handle a few animal carcasses." Ethan glared daggers at the older guy.
"Not helping. Besides, I think they put signs out that say if there's a carcass in there, and I don't see one."
"Okay..." Silena said, though she still seemed a little uncertain, picking at her phone case. They all walked up the ramp to the viewing window for the condors.
"Oh my gods, that's a huge bird!" Chris said. "That's so awesome!"
"It's like a turkey vulture but bigger," Alabaster commented, brushing off his collar before shoving Chris again, which prompted another primal sigh from Ethan.
"It's pretty cool," Silena said. Now that she could see for sure that there were no carcasses in the enclosure, her face had gone back to its normal color and she was smiling brightly again. "They're so majestic. And look at that wingspan!"
"And look at how tall they are," Alabaster said with a cruel grin. "That's gotta be more than half your height, Ethan." Ethan rolled his eye.
"Ha, ha, very funny. I'm tired of those jokes, you know."
"Yeah, but what fun would they be to make if you didn't get annoyed?" Luke asked with a grin. Ethan inhaled deeply and pushed his own hair back, looking at Luke.
"Et tu, Brute?"
"My name's Luke," Luke said, with a look of mock confusion on his face. Ethan scoffed.
"It's a- gods, don't you people read?" Luke chuckled.
"Just messing with you, I get the reference."
"My point still stands," Ethan said, crossing his arms as they kept walking.
"Family farm," Silena read. "Ooh, is that like a petting zoo?"
"We'll see," Alabaster said, walking backwards into the building.
"Why are you-" Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why are you walking backwards?"
"Because I like to be dramatic," Alabaster replied.
"Of course you do," Ethan sighed. "Honestly, I don't know why I even question you anymore." He turned to Luke and Chris. "Also, what was that you guys said earlier about him having three pictures of me in his room."
"Umm... nothing," Chris said, running after Alabaster. Ethan was about to chase after him when Silena squealed up ahead.
"Guys, come see the bunnies!" Ethan smiled slightly and walked over.
"Cute," he said, bending down to look through the gate at the sleepy rabbits.
"There's also a tortoise over here," Luke said, gesturing to the stall nearest the door. Alabaster's eyes gleamed.
"A tortoise. Good to know. So it's just snakes you're scared of? I thought for a second it might be all reptiles." Luke huffed.
"I am not scared of snakes. Just because I don't particularly like them doesn't mean I'm scared of them."
"Yeah, just you keep telling yourself that," Alabaster said.
"There are also goats over there," Ethan supplied, pointing to the other end of the barn.
"Nice!" Chris said as he and Alabaster ran over. Ethan sighed.
"I better go make sure they don't give each other concussions headbutting like goats or gods know what else they decide to do next. I swear, once we get back, I'm locking myself in my room with a book and a hot drink, where I am not to be disturbed." He turned and followed Chris and Alabaster.
Despite the massive expanse of their outdoor habitat, only one of the two polar bears the signs listed could be found, diving for toys in a pool, while the other must have been inside.
"So cool," Silena muttered, putting a hand to the glass, right before the polar bear smooshed her own nose to the glass in the same place, causing Silena's smile to grow and the others to laugh good-naturedly.
"Silena, the animal whisperer," Alabaster said.
"Not exactly," Silena chuckled.
"Primates or elephants next?" Chris asked after they finished up at the polar bears. "They're both right there."
"Primates are closer," Silena said. "Besides, I heard there's a baby orangutan."
"Aww," Ethan said.
"Well, let's go," Luke said.
"Well, would you look at that?" Alabaster said, checking his wristwatch as he looked at Ethan. "We've been here for over an hour and we haven't gotten kicked out yet."
"Yeah, my fingers are still crossed," Ethan said with a shake of his head as they entered the tunnel down to the primate exhibits, which was made to look like a giant, hollowed-out log. Chris's stomach growled audibly.
"Speaking of the time," he said, "we should probably eat soon."
"Yeah," Silena said. "But I heard about a great lunch spot, and it's coming up soon."
They walked down to the orangutan's exhibit. One of them was lying on her back on the floor, holding a ball of reddish fur that must have been the nursing baby.
"Aww, so cute!" Silena said. Everyone smiled.
***
After passing the rest of the primates and the elephants, they reached Silena's lunch spot. It was inside the Predators of the Serengeti building, looking out on the lion exhibit. It was sort of a theater spot, with steps and two benches at the top, facing a fenced-off stage that was supposedly for animal shows. Ethan sat down on the bench and slipped off his backpack. He was the one who'd carried everyone's lunches, so he unzipped his backpack and slipped them out, handing them out to the right people.
Ethan had a tuna sandwich, Luke and Chris had PB&J's, Alabaster had cold leftover pizza, and Silena had a salad, one of those "Greek" ones with chicken, feta, and olives. As they ate, they watched the lions pace around their exhibit, even coming close to the glass every now and then.
"I think they smell your nasty sandwich," Alabaster said to Ethan as he took another bite. "It carries."
"It's not nasty," Ethan said, rolling his guy. "Also, says the guy eating pineapple pizza. You're one to talk." Ethan didn't actually have anything against pineapple on pizza, he also liked it, but Alabaster had been antagonizing him all day and he felt like making a remark back. Alabaster chuckled.
After they all finished their lunch and kept walking. A big sign boasted that there was a carcass feeding in progress at the wild dogs, so they decided not to stop at that exhibit for Silena's sake. Next, however, was the cheetah exhibit. The cheetahs were sleeping in their little alcove, but the other window to the exhibit had an old safari jeep set into the glass, so the hood of the jeep was outside in the enclosure, but the rest of it was inside for children to play in and pretend to drive.
"Oh no," Ethan said, looking at Chris and Alabaster.
"I call driver!" Chris sprinted to the driver's side of the jeep and hopped up.
"Dang it." Alabaster climbed into the passenger's seat. Chris glanced into the rearview mirror.
"Luke, Ethan, Silena, get in the back!" Ethan sighed and climbed up, followed by Luke.
"Silena, come on," Luke said. She had put her backpack down on the crate that really little kids used as a stepping stool to get up into the back of the truck and was rifling through it.
"Just a sec," she said. "I need to find my selfie stick so I can take a picture of us."
"I really don't get the obsession with selfies," Ethan sighed, leaning back. Chris was just spinning the steering wheel with a crazed grin on his face. "Hurry up, because I swear Chris is one beat away from saying 'nyoom!' or something stupid like that."
"Hey!" Chris looked hurt.
"Found it!" Silena tossed her bag into the truck bed, then climbed up herself, attaching her phone to the selfie stick and then elongating it. "Everyone say safari!" No one except Chri said safari, but the photo still turned out excellent. Any photo Silena took always did. She always said she didn't know what career she should pursue in the future, but Ethan seriously thought she should be a professional photographer. The rest of them weren't as photogenic as the daughter of Aphrodite, but they always looked amazing in any photo she took.
"Nice photo." Ethan hopped down and walked to the next doors. The next room was several degrees hotter than any of the other buildings, and Ethan found himself pulling his jacket off and shoving it into his bag. An armadillo shuffled across the dirt floor of the enclosure on the wall, and a sloth hung from the ceiling. Silena grinned and snapped a photo.
The next enclosure was for dwarf mongoose. It was bigger, with a tunnel through it that led into a glass dome in the middle where kids could pop up and look at the exhibit from the inside. Ethan got on his knees and looked into the tunnel, estimating he could probably fit. He crawled through on his hands and knees, straightening up on his knees a little to see the mongoose scampering around from the inside. When he crawled out on the other side, he saw the expressions on Chris, Luke, and Alabaster's faces.
"Don't. You. Dare," he warned, walking around to grab his bag again.
"You can fit in the mongoose bubble," Alabaster snickered.
"Shut up," Ethan kicked him. "I'm not that short."
"Honestly, I'm impressed," Chris said. "And kind of jealous. I like messing around in the little kid things, but this is the only one I'm too tall for, but you fit perfectly!"
"Ugh." He marched straight for the doors. Next, they walked into the aviary. Just like the room they'd previously been in, it was warmer on the inside, with the added bonus of being loud, with a lot of squawky birds. They were pretty though. Ethan had to stifle a laugh when one of them left a splatter of white bird poo on Chris's shirt, which, unfortunately, happened to be black.
"Yikes," Silena winced when she saw the splatter on Chris's shoulder.
"It's fine," he said. "I can bear a bird poop stain for a few hours."
***
After passing the rhinos and the giraffes, neither of whom were doing much, they passed through the rainforest swamp room, which was also warm, and the most exciting attraction of which was a very lazy crocodile. Eventually, they arrived at the bats.
"Aww, are they fruit bats?" Silena asked. "Fruit bats are so fluffy and cute."
"I think so," Ethan said. They all walked in.
"Hey, look," Chris said, flipping open the info pad for the bats. "It's my family!"
"What?" Luke asked, looking over at him.
"It says they're called Rodriguez bats," he said.
"Okay, that's your worst joke yet," Ethan said, rolling his eyes. Of course, the joke was grounded. Chris's last name was Rodriguez. He was just glad there were no animals at the zoo that had the name Nakamura, he didn't want to get roped into another of Chris's stupid jokes.
After the bats, he got dragged onto a carousel. He didn't sit on any of the animals, he just stood in the aisle, though of course there was lots of teasing from Chris about the height limit to ride, which Ethan had elected to do his best to ignore. Even as a kid, Ethan hadn't liked carousels or merry-go-rounds. They always gave him vertigo. But everyone else seemed to be having a great time, so he decided to shut up.
***
After they had seen everything, they walked out past the front gate towards the zoo store. Thanks to Alabaster and Chris acting like idiots, they'd somehow managed to kill practically the whole day at the zoo. It was twilight now.
"Well, do we want to see if there's anything at the zoo store we want to buy?" Silena asked.
"As long as there's no like, matching t-shirts or anything, sure," Ethan said. Everyone else nodded.
"Okay," Silena said. "Oh, and Luke and Chris, you have to pay for whatever you get."
"Wow," Chris said. "Way to ruin the fun."
"Won't be very fun if you get busted for shoplifting, will it?" Ethan asked with his arms crossed.
As they were leaving to get back on the train, Alabaster walked over to Ethan, his bag from the zoo store in hand.
"Um, hey," he said.
"What do you want?" Ethan asked. It was cooling down, so he'd put his jacket back on and pulled the hood up.
"It's just... I kind of feel bad for teasing you today, so I got you something to maybe make up for it?" He reached into his bag and pulled out a small stuffed animal- an African wild dog.
"Um... thanks?" Ethan took it. He wasn't really a stuffed animal person, but for some reason the gesture made him feel warm inside. He wasn't sure how to react."
"You're welcome," Alabaster said, then stepped onto the train car.
A/N: Yes , the eagle nest thing was a self-callout. I'm 17 and I still climb in it every time. Also, the pictures of Ethan thing is based off a fanart someone sent in the Titan Army Discord server I'm in. Regarding Silena having a phone, I feel like the TA demigods could cause they're on the same side as the monsters so they aren't gonna attack them.