Chapter Text
When Sakura woke, her breath was stolen from her chest. To her side, sunlight cast gently onto Sasuke’s pale face, softening the angular cut of his defined nose and jaw.
He was beautiful.
What they’d done the previous night warmed her from the inside-out, right up to her reddened cheeks that rivaled the tone of her pink hair.
Lucky. How lucky she was.
He’d stayed the night. She was in bed with the boy– the man of her dreams. And on top of that, it was after two weeks of lunches and dinners, and sparring, and walks home from the hospital late at night, even though Sasuke should know by now she was more than capable enough to take care of herself.
“Morning,” Sakura whispered as he stirred. It’s like he knew she was staring.
He blinked at her slowly, clearing the sleep from his eyes.
“Aa.”
His smile, subtle as it was, made her heart explode with affection and love. She put a hand on his chest, and joy leapt in her chest when he didn’t move away. Together, they bask in the tranquility of the calm morning.
She was drifting back to sleep when he spoke again.
“... Sakura, I think I’ve decided.”
Her pulse quickened.
“About what, Sasuke-kun?”
“I’ll be leaving on my journey tomorrow.”
Sakura tried to dampen the disappointment that rose reflexively. Instead, she tried to look on the bright side. There was something between them, she could feel it. Somewhere along the lines something had changed. An actual chance had never felt so real.
“Will you come back?”
“Yes.”
Her heart leapt. He said it so easily, so plainly. Her pulse fluttered at her throat, singing with hope.
“To me?” She clarified. Because she needed to know. She needed to know he wasn’t just going to return to Konoha, physically, but to them– whatever that had been blossoming between them for the past few weeks.
Beneath her touch, where he’d been relaxed, he stiffened.
And Sakura crashed back down to earth.
“Sakura…” Sasuke said, wary.
“You told me to wait,” Sakura’s heart wept. Fingers pressed into an old wound, threatening to rip out the scar tissue.
“I never said that,” Sasuke denied. He’d moved out of her embrace, now already hanging halfway off the edge of the bed. Sakura sat up too, using the sheets to cover her bare chest. The foot between them felt like a lifetime of differences, and it was devastatingly, hauntingly familiar.
“You said there would be a next time.” Don’t cry. Not this time.
The memory flashed through her mind unbidden: the Konoha gates, a sunny morning, a gentle breeze. An open smile.
“I was wrong. There was never going to be a next time.”
Cruel, cruel. This man was cruel.
For the first time in a long while, Sasuke’s face was completely unreadable to her. That somehow hurt even more than his words. In an instant, Sasuke was entirely closed off. And for the third time in her life, her heart was broken into a million pieces, by the same man she could not stop loving. Her heart was torn with his bare hands into two, and she was bleeding all over the floor.
Sakura had told herself she was ready. Her relationship with Sasuke held no expectations. She was the one who loved him after all. It had never been the other way round. After the war, she’d resolved that above everything else, no matter what happened, all she’d ever want was to be his friend. For him to trust her. To be by his side. Wasn’t this enough? Wasn’t she prepared for the way this would’ve inevitably turned out?
Pain. She was in pain .
She was dying, all over again. Why did she do this to herself? Again? Why was all she could ever do was to love this man? So much?
When did Sakura ever learn?
Her breath came out in shudders. She didn’t even want to know what her face looked like right now. But it must’ve been pathetic, because Uchiha Sasuke, one of the most arrogant men she knew, told her:
“I’m sorry.”
… Don’t pity me.
This Sakura wasn’t the one who was always left behind. This Sakura wasn’t the fifteen-year-old deadweight who only knew how to cry. This Sakura wasn’t the one blinded by love for a thirteen-year-old boy who would never be hers.
This Sakura had been through war. She had grown as a person and as a woman. She had friends she loved who she’d put her life on the line for. She was more than just a girl helplessly in love. She was strong.
She took another breath and met him dead in the eyes, so Sasuke knew he had nothing to be sorry about. She loosened her clenched jaw. She even managed a smile.
“Don’t be.”
Confusion.
He’s confused.
“Thank you for everything, Sasuke. I wish you the best.” They still had a whole day ahead– why did it sound like she was saying goodbye?
She supposed she was.
This time will be different. She may love him forever, but this time she will not wait for him.