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Chrissy, Chrissy, Chrissy. It had all been for Chrissy. Even as he lay there, dying, talking to Dustin, taking his last ever breaths… he just couldn’t help but think about Chrissy Cunningham. About her smile, about her sweetness, about how he had to make this sacrifice, how he had to because he’d been such a coward the first time, running away, running away and letting such a kind soul die…
Now, it was his turn to die. He smiled at Dustin, mustered up a smile, even through all the pain, spoke to him. Images of Chrissy consumed his mind, even as he attempted to comfort Dustin - because really, even though he loved that kid, even though it pained him in these last few moments to think of how traumatized poor Dustin Henderson would be… he couldn’t stop thinking of Chrissy Cunningham. He’d tried to hide it, but he hadn’t been able to stop thinking of her all throughout their mission, hadn’t been able to stop hating himself for what had happened. Yes, it was only right of him to do this…
“I love you, man,” he mumbled, yet he could barely speak. He could hardly think, either. All that he felt was fear, fear and sadness…
He finally knew what dying felt like - immense pain, extreme pain… pain that he desired to feel no longer. He didn’t know what was coming next, what to anticipate. He didn’t want Dustin to fear for him. He just wanted the pain to stop, couldn’t stop thinking of how all he wanted was to be with Chrissy. And finally… finally, it all stopped. No more breathing.
He was surprised, because he’d always expected that when it stopped, when he stopped breathing, that would simply be the end. The definite and final end of his chaotic, tumultuous life. And yet, even though he couldn’t see anything, even though he knew that he wasn’t breathing… it was as if, in a sense, he wasn’t quite dead.
He felt nervous, immensely nervous, as he could feel himself… floating. He tried to open his eyes, yet couldn’t quite seem to. He knew that he didn’t feel like himself as he floated through the air, knew that he was no longer with Dustin Henderson, no longer in his wounded body. And he was so, so confused, so frightened, because he had died, hadn’t he? So where was he going? Why couldn’t he open his eyes?
He was dead, and somehow he was… he was in the air. He wanted to scream, but couldn’t. He didn’t quite feel human anymore, no, he felt much like something else, like… like something that he couldn’t describe. He couldn’t believe that he was dead.
He felt almost empty, even though he could think, as if he was… a being, yet didn’t have a body, not a real, fleshy body (so how was he floating? What was happening? How was he doing anything at all, when he wasn’t breathing?)
He had to admit that an afterlife had always felt like a fairytale to him, always sounded false. He’d never believed in a God, not really, which everyone looked down on him for - he’d always assumed that when he died, there’d be nothing. It was a thought that had always kept him up at night, though he supposed that this whole entire week, this week of dealing with Demobats and other crazy things, should have been enough to change his mind…
He landed on his feet, on what felt like a fuzzy cloud, and immediately wanted to convulse (he still couldn’t feel anything, jesus, why couldn’t he feel anything?) There were a million things that he wanted to say, that he wanted to do. Too many thoughts racing through his head - anxious thoughts, thoughts of Chrissy, thoughts of Dustin, thoughts of the whole entire group… thoughts about himself, about how he had always feared death, about how this was why he had gone out of his way to enjoy himself when he was still alive…
And finally, finally, he could move a little. He still wasn’t in his body… no, but his mouth, he knew that he could open his mouth, and his eyes, he felt that he could open his eyes…
Eddie opened his eyes, his thoughts bouncing around inside his head. And when he opened his eyes, he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing.
Chrissy Cunningham. There were clouds all around, an interesting looking sky… but none of it caught his attention, none of it mattered. Because even though he was afraid, more afraid than he’d ever been in his life… she was standing right there, smiling at him, a look of softness in her precious blue eyes.
He couldn’t believe it. He wanted to cry (could he cry? Oh… oh, she was right here, finally right in front of him, it was a miracle… it didn’t matter whether he could cry or not…)
“Chrissy?” he said, astonished. He sounded like himself. He was mesmerized by her, by her youthful appearance, by her gorgeous smile, by how she looked just as happy to see him as he was…
“Eddie,” she mumbled back in response, not once glancing away from him. She sounded so kind, so loving, so happy. There was a twinkle in her blue eyes, he noticed - a knowing look, even though she somehow simultaneously looked a little sad (and he knew, he thought, why she looked sad - after all, she was… oh, he didn’t even want to think of it. He was just so very happy to see her again.) “Eddie, I…” She glanced down briefly, as if thinking a bit. “I heard what you said, out in the real world. Right before you played your guitar solo, about how you were doing it all for me.”
He stood there, dumbfounded. He had so, so many questions… he was so happy to have her standing right in front of him, could feel himself starting to cry. She knew - she must have known - but he couldn’t even bring himself to be embarrassed, because he’d never expected to see her again. There was just so much that he wanted to say. “I… Chrissy, I never thought I’d see you again… I… I’m…” He hesitated. “It was true, Chrissy.” He looked her directly in the eye. “It really was all for you. I’m almost glad I’m dead, because if I weren’t I…” He tried to hide the crack in his voice. “I’d have never seen you again.”
She looked at him, looked at him with those soft blue eyes, eyes that never had any kind of meanness behind them. She looked at him sadly, and yet smiled all the same. She looked, he noticed, as though she wanted to cry too, and yet she placed her pretty hand on his face, never once averting her eyes from him. “Eddie, I… I want to let you know that it wasn’t your fault. I know that you must blame yourself, I can tell that you blame yourself, but it’s not your fault. You’re my hero, Eddie.”
His eyes widened in shock. He really was shocked - surprised, fearful, happy… happy, because even though it was over, even though he was dead, he was talking to Chrissy Cunningham, talking to her again even though he’d never believed he would be able to again. In a way, it made him feel alive. “What?”
She continued to smile at him, her eyes crinkling. “You’re my hero, Eddie.” She glanced down briefly, shifted her feet somewhat (she was in her cheerleader outfit, the same one she’d been wearing when she… oh, he didn’t want to think of it.) “Eddie, I… I realized not long after I came here… I realized that you were always the one. That it was never Jason.” She continued to glance down shyly. “At first, when I came here, I was just… scared. I was so, so scared, like I can tell you are now.” She started to bite her lip, and he blushed, slightly embarrassed. “And I remember that one of the first things I thought was that if you were here, then I’d feel better. Safer. I was with Jason for a long time, but I wasn’t thinking of him after I…” She gulped, looking troubled. “After dying. I thought of you. I thought of how you made me laugh, of how I never felt tense or nervous around you. And that’s when I knew. I felt so stupid, because it took so long, but… you’re the one. You’re my hero, Eddie, you make me feel so safe. You did it for me, and I… I love you.” Chrissy smiled bashfully.
Eddie didn’t quite know how to respond. Hell, that was an understatement - he was, in actuality, at a complete loss for words. Was he dreaming? How had something so scary turned into something so… lovely? Lovely… she was lovely, Chrissy Cunningham, the girl he’d crushed on for years, his longest ever crush, the redhead who Hawkins High didn’t deserve. She loved him. He must have been dreaming…
“Eddie?” Chrissy asked quietly, all of a sudden looking nervous. He bit his lip, trying to ignore his loud, active thoughts - he didn’t want her to look nervous, not poor Chrissy, not sweet Chrissy…
“I love you too,” he said, perhaps a little too quickly. He couldn’t help it - he couldn’t believe it. He didn’t know how to calm his anxiety. They were in the afterlife, they must have been, and even though he’d always thought that dying would be scary, he was seeing now that maybe… just maybe, even though he missed Dustin, even though he missed his uncle, even though he stupidly missed Hawkins… that maybe, if he was here with Chrissy Cunningham, who apparently loved him, maybe the afterlife wouldn’t be so bad after all.
She giggled a bit in response, kindness behind her eyes and yet slight sadness. “I know that that might have been a… a bit much, but I’ve been watching, Eddie. At first I wasn’t sure that I wanted to, just because of how afraid I was, but I wanted to make sure that you were okay.” She frowned, all of a sudden looking conflicted. “I’m so glad to see you again, I’m so, so glad, I… I know that this was for me, but I also know that you must be so upset. I mean…” She begun to look immensely depressed. “Eddie, you’re dead…” Her lip quivered a bit. “I mean… I’m dead, too… god, I can’t believe that I’m dead, that you are… but even though I want to be with you, I wanted you to be safe so badly…” Tears started to form in her eyes.
He quickly shook his head, wanted to wipe Chrissy Cunningham’s tears away. He had to admit that it was a lot to deal with, a lot to cope with, that there was much he wanted to ponder about… and yet, he didn’t want Chrissy to cry, didn’t want her to feel responsible. “Chrissy, look at me.” She looked up at him yet again, tears running down her freckled face. “We’re going to get through this together. There is nothing - and I mean nothing - that I want more right now than to be here with you. I mean, I never thought I’d see you again.” He started to smile, yet simultaneously wanted to cry, just at the sight of seeing her do so. “Ever since all this shit happened with the stupid Demogorgon, I’ve just… I’ve just been thinking about you, nonstop. They thought that I did it, Chrissy. But I never want to hurt you, I never would hurt you. You’re so sweet, Chrissy. I… I’ve liked you for years.” He noticed that she started to smile - he did so as well. “You know, Chrissy… this might sound crazy, but in a way, I’m glad that I’m dead. Because it means that I get to see you, that I get to talk to you… that we can be together, if that’s what you want.”
She giggled as he started to wipe her tears away, a look of admiration and yet worry behind her eyes. “That’s exactly what I want, Eddie. I just wish that I’d realized it on the outside sooner.” She held out her hand, a smile on her face, her tears starting to dry. “Take my hand, Eddie. I’ll show you around.”
He took her hand, and both stared at each other as he did so. He stared into her big, blue eyes, and she stared back into his dark brown eyes. Although he couldn’t quite place it, he felt as though there was an understanding of some sort between the two of them.
As Eddie begun to walk through the clouds with Chrissy Cunningham, the queen of Hawkins High - and now, a frightened, kindhearted, frail girl who would lead him through the afterlife - for the first time in a long time, even though he was afraid… Eddie Munson felt fulfilled.