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It was raining, the television at a low volume and Jisung was thinking if whoever was out there knocked again, he’d have to punch their face in.
The rhythmic noise had been going on for almost a full minute and even as Jisung’s at as still as possible, hoping they’d go away with every footstep that was not heard coming to the door, the bastard out there only insisted, almost as if they knew he was home.
A animated growl threaten to rip straight from his chest as he stomped towards the cramped hallway, eyes glancing at the clock overhead that read two to midnight, and yanked the door open.
The ‘what!?’ that had settled nicely on his lips died out almost as quickly as it came the very moment his eyes landed on the exceedingly battered and bruised lanky figure of his mortal enemy Hwang Hyunjin who looked like he was barely holding his skin together.
The taller blonde boy smiled painfully. “I didn’t…” he inhaled harshly. “know where else to go.”
A few minutes later and Hwang Hyunjin was settled on the closed toilet seat in Han Jisung’s small bathroom as the younger boy crouched and rummaged through the first aid kit he’d dropped on the floor, frantic hands searching for spirits.
“Christ, Hwang!” Jisung muttered, drenching the wool in spirits. “What the hell happened?”
Hyunjin who was looking anywhere other than the man on the floor closed his eyes and struggled to breathe. “Nothing.”
A disbelieving scoff. “Yeah, ‘cause nothing lands you on the porch of your mortal enemy half beaten to death at twelve in the fucking morning!?”
“I’m sorry.” Hyunjin managed.
Jisung finally turned to face him, a plethora of items in hands. “I should be telling you that. This is going to hurt.”
It was. Hyunjin’s had taken off his shirt and trousers, sitting near naked on Han Jisung’s toilet seat at the early hours of the morning, shivering both from the cold and just pure exhaustion. If anyone had told either of them even a day before that this would happen, they would’ve spit in their face and punched them at the same time.
It was no secret that they hated each other. They’d hated each other since the first day of high school when Hyunjin had made Jisung miss a test from the previous semester that was crucial to his grade and even as they were now graduating in a few months, that hatred still lingered and showed in small things that they did towards each other.
Their mutual friend group could not understand why they couldn’t just suck it up and get along because according to them, they were both great people but the duo had declared friendship over their dead bodies and with the look of things, Hyunjin was nearing that state fairly quickly.
His skin was littered in cuts and gashes that couldn’t have been done by one person alone. Bruises that had reopened, wounds not fully healed. They were everywhere.
Everywhere except his face.
“Here, bite this.” Jisung offered Hyunjin the shirt off his back. “It’s going to hurt like hell.” He reiterated. “Ready?”
Hyunjin nodded and said words muffled by the cloth in his mouth.
Jisung took a deep breath, almost as if he was preparing to do it to himself, before he rubbed the cotton into three open scratched at the same time. Hyunjin barely reacted, only breathing harshly through his nose. Jisung was bewildered.
“Alright. I’m about to pour the rubbing alcohol, okay?”
A nod was his go ahead and opened the bottle swiftly downed it on the largest open wound on Hyunjin’s thigh and although the scream was muffled, it was still loud enough that Jisung could almost hear every ounce of pain the taller boy was feeling.
He squeezed his shoulder. “I know, I know. I’m sorry. Just one left, okay? One left, can you bear it for me?”
The tone of his voice had taken on the forced maturity he’d been subject to growing up, the one he used when he was tending to the injury inflicted on him and his younger siblings by their deadbeat parents, all too used to this scenario.
Hyunjin nodded gently, chest rising and falling rapidly. By the time Jisung had doused the second wound in alcohol, it rose and fell even faster. Hushed words of comfort spewed from the younger man’s mouth as he disinfected the rest of the wounds and bandaged the ones that needed to be.
In almost thirty minutes, he’d led Hyunjin to his living room after passing him a fresh pair of clothes and throwing the bloody ones into the laundry.
They sat on the two man couch and stared at the television that was still in the lowest possible volume. Han Jisung did not want to say anything but he had questions and he was sure if he didn’t voice them, Hyunjin would be more than comfortable with never talking about what happened.
“So you gonna tell me who did this?” He asked, one brow raised, arms crossed as half his body was turned in Hyunjin’s direction.
Blondie refused to meet his eyes, opting instead to study his ceiling in faux awe as if the bland beige colours were anything of interest.
“Hwang, I’m serious. You can’t not talk about it because you know damn well I’m going to bother you until you do. Besides, I’m sure Chan hyung—“
“No!” Hyunjin interrupted sternly, eyes wider than plates. “Don’t tell Chan hyung, please. You can’t tell him. Or Minho and Changbin hyung, Seungmin, Felix, Jeongin, anyone else! Don’t tell anyone else, ever, Han. You have to promise me!”
Taken aback from the sudden outburst and Hyunjin’s hands curled on his shirt, crumpling and tightening, he nodded slowly.
“Alright.” He said. “I won’t tell anyone, relax.”
A deep breath exited the older boy as he leaned back into the sofa. They said nothing once again and for a while, Jisung was okay with that, after seeing how frantic the subject made Hyunjin. He wasn’t the best human out there but he wasn’t evil, either.
So they sat in silence.
“I didn’t know where else to go.” Said Hyunjin, after five minutes.
“Hm?” Jisung who’d zoned out asked.
“I’d promised Chan hyung that the bullying had stopped and Minho and Changbin had taken two months out of their lives to make sure I got to and from school safe because he, he was everywhere and he was angry and he hated me for no reason.”
Bullying? What was he talking about. Hyunjin couldn’t have been bullied, everybody loved him.
“But I felt guilty, I feel guilty that they have to babysit me simply because I can’t be a man and fucking stand up for myself!” His breathed had become rushed and angry. “Why do they have to take care of me? Chan hyung is student body president, Minho hyung is captain of the dance club, Changbin hyung is not only music club president by part time P.E coach. They’re so busy! They have their lives to attend to, why do they have to put that on hold just because I’m not man enough?”
The first tear slipped just as the movie credits rolled in. Then the second, the third.
“I hate feeling like this, Han. I hate that I’m not strong enough, I hate that it’s so easy to zero in on me as a target, I hate that I have to lie to everyone. I’m sick of this! What did I do? Why does he hate me? Why does he hurt me and why can I never fight back in the moments that fucking matter!” He shook his head gently and cried in his hands. “I’m worthless! I’m so fucking worthless, it’s funny!”
Jisung sat rooted to his spot, unsure of what to do about the twitching in his hands and the dire need to bundle up the sobbing mess of a boy into his arms. He’d never seen Hwang Hyunjin cry, always thought he was too sarcastic and kind for anything genuinely bad to happen to him. But now, well Jisung felt incredibly stupid and incredibly angry. Who the hell was this bastard!
“You’re not worthless.” He voiced, inching closer until his hand was rubbing circled into Hyunjin’s back. “And don’t be stupid, Hwang. Being hurt doesn’t make you any less of a man. I get hurt all the time, hell, even Chan hyung does. Does that make you see him any differently?”
When Hyunjin shook his head, he continued.
“Listen, some people are just pricks, okay? That doesn’t make you weak or anything, just makes them pieces of shit who get a fucking orgasm from picking on other people.” He pulled him closer. “Now quit crying because I don’t know what to say when people cry.”
For all it was worth, a teary laugh escaped Hyunjin as he made to wipe at his eyes.
“Sorry.” He said. “For all…this. Showing up at your house at twelve in the morning, making you clean my wounds, ranting and crying. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise for being a human being, you loser.” Jisung shoved him lightly. “Now, I’ve been a good guy all evening, it’s time for a catch. You’re going to have to give me a name or I’m afraid Chan hyung never being able to fall asleep is going to come in handy.”
Hyunjin’s mouth fell open. “Are you threatening me?”
Jisung nodded. “Absolutely.”
A scoff and rolled eyes simultaneously. “You’re such a dick. It’s Kim Song-ji, okay. I was going for a walk around elevenish and he cornered me because for some reason he was up, too. Now will you re-promise not to tell anyone?”
A dramatized nod and salute. “I re-promise!”
They both laugh and Jisung offered to reheat the half box of pizza in the fridge if Hyunjin picked another movie, not caring that it was a school night. Eventually, the older boy dosed off from exhaustion barely an hour into the movie and Jisung moved him to his room and they both fell asleep.
In the early morning after breakfast and no mention of what happened the night before, although the thick air between them had thinned out, Jisung ushered Hyunjin to school first, wanting to go pick his sister’s up from his aunt’s house. He eventually made it to their high school with only a few minutes to save him from being late.
Good thing, too because as soon as he walked in, the speakers crackled to life and his principals voice came on.
“All year 12s please report to the auditorium for an announcement.”
He and his friends made their way to the school’s large auditorium and had to wait a couple of minutes before the principal arrived, standing on a podium, mic in hand as he addressed the students.
Jisung didn’t tune in much but soon enough he heard the keywords:
“…and I’m terribly sorry to have to tell you all this but your classmate Kim Song-ji has been admitted to the hospital in critical condition after being found beaten half to death on the sidewalk by passerby this early morning. This news may come as a shock to many of you and it’s even more disturbing for Song-ji’s parents who…”
That was all he needed to hear, tuning out both the principals words and the hushed whispers from all of his classmates.
Han Jisung’s eyes travelled to a corner of the room where Hwang Hyunjin stared back, eyes wide in shock. And an amused smile made way unto his lips, eyes swallowed up in his cheeks and his bruised knuckles brushed against the insides of his trouser pockets.