Work Text:
It wasn’t the kiss you know
It comes unbidden to Khao one day during filming.
The sun is beating down on them and he can feel the roll of sweat trickle slowly down his forehead even as the little hand fan he’s clutching whirrs with all its might.
Khao doesn’t know why he’s thinking about Mix in this moment. Mix, drunk and words close to slurring, clutching his room temperature beer in a dimly lit bar almost a year ago and looking up at Khao with a dreamy look on his face.
It was everything about him
Mix had continued, eyes glossing over but determined to make Khao understand. Yes, yes . He’s very cool . Khao had agreed back then, mostly a joke, just to appease Mix. But Mix had risen suddenly, catching onto how Khao was humoring him, and clutched at his shoulder trying to make Khao understand .
He is. He really, really is.
The sun is beating down on him, his little fan whirrs and First is standing a little bit away directly in his line of sight, having what seems to be an intense conversation with the assistant director.
He was just so~ Mix is in his ears again, ignoring how Khao had laughed at him then and soldiered on. He’s just soooo good. At everything.
Khao watches as First points to the script in his hand with a pen, makes a few marks before popping it into his mouth, chewing on it lightly. First’s jaw juts out as he does so, his nose flaring slightly, the way it does when he’s concentrating. And Khao can’t help but think about how it feels when that look of singular focus on First’s face is directed at him.
When First looks at him and Khao feels that nothing, not a person or object, exists outside of them, outside of that gaze on Khao.
When he works, in the back of his mind Mix shakes his head in exasperation, he’s so serious, he’s so different. At times I would feel scared of him, doubt if I ever really knew him.
Khao can’t tell what makes the tension in First’s conversation break but he can tell the exact moment it does. First stops chewing and his lips stretch on either side of the pen into a smile for a split second before he and the AD burst out into laughter.
But then he would go back to playing around with me. He would go back to being his goofy, joking self. Mix paused to blink but he was nowhere near done. He would go back to being Earth. My P’ Earth. I couldn’t take it.
Khao had tried to be more serious after Mix’s little outburst, sensing that he was starting to get agitated.
Mix’s gay panic after filming his first kiss with Earth is a well-known secret. He is constantly made fun of for it, Khao often piling on. The shy and embarrassed look on Mix’s face as a result is so delightful and the way he whines and complains to Earth is amusing to watch.
This joke is a crowd pleaser and Khao had always pinned Mix to be part of that crowd. Earth is always extra sweet to him whenever Mix gets picked on. And maybe Mix does like it, his self-satisfied smile every time Earth fawns over him is too much of a giveaway.
But there was clearly more to it. Khao didn’t really get it but he had tried to respect it.
It wasn’t the kiss. It wasn’t I promise. Mix had continued at Khao, his literal captive audience, as the hand on his shoulder dug in almost painfully. It was him. It was how much I loved him–
Okay okay, time to go home. Earth had grabbed Mix’s hand and pried it off Khao’s shoulder. Mix gasped when he noticed it was Earth. I love you. Mix whispered furiously, horribly loud and unsubtle, his hand coming up to squeeze at a bicep, openly adoring. Like a chain reaction, Earth’s face falls open, naked in its doting. Come, Earth had said as he bent down to drape Mix’s arms around his shoulder, steadying him to his feet with a hand on Mix’s waist, let’s go home .
Earth had thanked him on the way out. Khao had texted him earlier to come haul Mix’s drunk ass home. He hadn’t really known what to make of the way Earth’s hand had curled possessively around Mix’s waist, pulling him closer than was perhaps necessary, all the while Mix chattering his ear off.
Khao doesn’t really get it.
First turns his head then, looks directly at Khao. It is as though he could suddenly feel Khao’s gaze, that hasn’t wavered from him in the past 15 minutes. First has stopped laughing but the mirth tugs at the corners of his lips still, crow’s feet on full blast, as he squints at Khao under the blaring sun, looking just as sweaty as Khao feels.
He’s still smiling as he approaches Khao in the same way that he always does, a little bit like an overeager puppy, ready to share some nonsense story from his day. First grabs Khao’s wrist and brings the arm holding the fan to his face, ‘wanna grab lunch together later?’
Khao nods, relinquishing the fan, as First grins at him in triumph.
And maybe – just the tiniest bit – he does.