Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“But Gamewizard, you can’t just introduce a new sector! It’s way too late in the series to,” yeah, watch me! I found a cartoon called Glitch Techs and I just HAD to add my favorite character to the Gameverse! I ain’t waiting until Third Gen, the Prime Gen is now!

A Newbie’s Sector Quest

Coruscant; Vinyl City (Play “Vs. Sayu” from No Straight Roads!)

“Hello, everyone! Thank you all for coming to my show! Seeing all my wonderful fans fills me with love, pyun! The concert will begin soon, so stay lovely! Pyun!”

Vinyl City used Symphonian technology to provide energy for its citizens. Their generators were designed to absorb Music Chi provided by the most talented musicians. Sayu (from NSR) was an especially popular icon: she appeared onstage as a giant, pink mermaid with heart-shaped pupils, and platinum-white hair with magenta streaks. The stage was decorated with seaweed, floating fish, and water graphics. The audience primarily consisted of adolescents, kids, or parents of kids.

“She’s even cuter in person!” exclaimed Miko. The teenage human was distinguished from the crowds of aliens with her bluish-violet hair, a yellow T-shirt with a winking black cat, purple pants, and a blue hoodie tied around her waist. Her red socks went into large, pale-blue sneakers. “Five, how could you not be in love with her?!”

“Since when are you into concerts, anyway, Meeks?” asked High Five, a thin, half-Mexican human with puffy purple hair and a green shirt with a game controller design. Though he was a year younger than Miko, he was notably taller than his friend, but Miko’s brighter hair and more energetic demeanor allowed her to stand out far more.

“Since THIS girl showed up in Guitar Queen Seven!” expressed the violet-haired gamer. “She was added as a DLC last month, and I just fell in love! Her songs are so good! And I still have the muscle memory! Up down right right, String 1 String 2 String 4 String 3…”

Five chuckled at his friend’s antics. Between the two of them, he and Miko were diehard gamers. Their initial encounters took place in online fighting games, where the boy would always find himself royally beaten by the skilled girl. It wasn’t until they signed up for a gaming tournament that they would meet in person, and from then, their lives couldn’t have been more exciting.

The tournament entailed engaging in a virtual reality fighting game designed by Hinobi Tech, one of Coruscant’s top gaming companies. While the tournament was meant to only have one victor, Miko and Five used teamwork to win together. But it was then they learned it was more than just a tournament: Hinobi had cut a special deal with the Coruscant Kids Next Door. They were willing to sell the KND new technology and weapons for dealing with rogue robots and Programs, a naturally common occurrence on the high-tech planet. As a bonus, Hinobi promised to find potential new recruits to join the KND and use these gadgets. So by then, Five and Miko became recruits of new Sector Hinobi. But as an added bonus, they were hired as part-time workers for a Hinobi store.

“Ah, I recognize that voice from anywhere!”

Five and Miko looked over as another duo approached them. One was Hiro, a boy with messy dark hair, and Go-Go, a girl with a purple streak in her black hair who was notably taller than her male partner. Both were fellow operatives of Sector Six (from Big Hero 6). “Go-Go, mah girl!” Miko cheered. “Hiro, mah man! You ready to start lovin’?!”

“Not until he’s taller.” Go-Go said, blowing some gum as it popped.

“Hah hah, I don’t think she meant it like that.” Hiro said with an awkward laugh.

“So, how’s the gaming business? Is Mitch being a good boy?”

“Ah, you know Mitch.” Five shrugged. “He’s, uh…he’s a tough one, alright.”

Mitch Williams was the leader of Sector Hinobi and a famous online game streamer. But due to his remarkable arrogance, he wasn’t favored too highly by his teammates. So, they were always happy to be away from him.

“So, who is this girl, anyway?” Hiro asked, looking toward the stage. “Is she from Aquaria? Why does that water look fake?”

“Well, she’s actually not real.” Five answered.

“ZZZT!” Miko swiped her arms. “We can’t use the ‘R’ word around her…”

“Why not?” Hiro replied.

“Sayu is a hologram.” Five explained. “I heard there’s a group of animators behind the scenes.”

“Like one of those solid holograms?”

“Kind of, but I don’t think she has a will of her own. One of them is providing the voice, someone else designs her outfits, one plays the music, and the other is constantly guiding her motions.”

“Don’t talk down about Sayu like that!” Miko defended. “The love that she makes us feel is real, and her soul is real! Just like Ally.” She tapped her right wristband as a red ostrich appeared digitally. “Isn’t that right, Ally?” She hugged her faithful companion.

“But if there’s an actual singer behind the scenes, why does she hide behind a hologram?” Hiro asked. “Is she good?”

“Well, of COURSE she’s GOOD!” Miko insisted, returning Ally to her band. “But you can’t just go around and show people how good you are! Then too many people’ll be hassling her for contracts or something! That’s why people use usernames or avatars online! Right, High Five?”

“You said it, Me_K.O.. Hey, it’s starting!”

“Yes! Quick, grab your air guitars!” Miko got in position, an eager grin on her face.

“Nnno.” Go-Go said.

“Does Sayu even use a guitar?” Five asked.

“Undercurrents pull at your heart, Feeling so powerful, it… LEADS you on! The waves of emotion wash over me, But can you see the ocean… through the reef?”

“Hey, she is kinda good!” Hiro said, the crowds awash in dance by the joyful vocals. “How long’s she been around?”

“About a year!” Five answered, his voice barely audible. “She got famous pretty quick! I think she even became a megastar of NSR, the group that runs-”

“Can it with the lecture, Five!” Miko yelled. “It’s time for the glow sticks!”

“STRONGER… than hate! Anchored through the tidal waves!” The audience raised sticks of many colors and waved them excitedly. “Go on, take the bait! You can’t fight the CURRENTS of lo-…zzzzkkkkttt…”

The waving ceased as gasps filled the masses: Sayu began sizzling and twitching in an erratic manner. “L-L-Lo-Lo, l-l-lo-lo… hahahaha…Hahahahaha!” Sayu’s stuttering seemed to change into laughter. “HA HA ha ha ha…” An eerie grin replaced her features, her skin turning green with red eyes. “MWAH HA HA hah!” She cackled like an old mad scientist.

“HUH?!” Miko gawked, the color on her face drained in horror. “That’s not Sayu’s voice…”

“Behold! I, Technus, master of all things mechanical, have become one with the illusory mermaid that is idolized by these alien adolescents! With her influence, I shall dominate the newest generation of Coruscanti children and become the supreme ruler of Coruscant! And to initiate my new command, I have composed a special song that is bound to earn the loyalty of you young whippersnappers.”

“Oh, nerds!” Five panicked. “Did you guys bring your equipment?!”

“Right here!” Hiro used a Compowder to swap his and Go-Go’s outfits into blue and yellow hi-tech armor, respectively. “But we shouldn’t just charge him. He might be expecting resistance.”

“I’m calling our team.” Go-Go said, her communicator ready. “You call yours.”

“Good idea!” Five beamed. “Miko, you… Miko?” His bright-haired friend was absent.

Technus cleared his throat and began to sing, “Do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do, I’m the best just so ya know—WAAH!” The ghost suffered laser blasts to the head.

“BOO! YOU STINK!” Miko shouted, having run up onto the aqua-themed stage, armed with a high-tech gauntlet on her right arm. “Bring back Sayu, you party-pooper! Aaah!” The holo-fish became ghost-like and began chewing against Miko’s arms and face.

“Miko!” Five shot lasers from his own gauntlet to destroy the fish. “Don’t just rush in, we don’t know what this thing-” Technus fired digi-fish at both kids.

“Did you think I wouldn’t expect Kids Next Door at this concert? My ghostly mini-ons were already in position!”

There were screams throughout the audience as everyone’s glow sticks suddenly wrapped around their necks. Monstrous ghosts rose out of the sticks as they choked the aliens. Hiro and Go-Go had already dropped their sticks, but as the ghosts tried to latch onto them, the two quickly stomped and destroyed the sticks, the Possessor Ghosts escaping. “You kiddies better stay put, or my ghosts will strangle the ‘love’ out of these mortals!”

“I’ll knock the love outta YOU, FIRST!” Miko materialized a purple hammer from her gauntlet and leapt to bash Technus in the head.

“MIKO!” Five yelled in panic.

Go-Go, whose hands and shoes were equipped with discs, began throwing said discs around to chop the Ghost Sticks in a manner that didn’t hurt the citizens. “I’ll take care of the ghosts!”

“I’ll help!” Hiro began throwing EMP Bombs around to disable the sticks and thwart the ghosts’ hold over the electrical items.

High Five used jetshoes to fly around Technus and shoot the ghost. Technus willed digi-fish to attack him, and he also conjured a trident from Sayu’s code to clash with Miko’s hammer. Technus suddenly spun and whacked Miko away with his tailfin. Miko dispelled the hammer and summoned Ally from her gauntlet. “Let’s go, Ally!” She leapt on the solid hologram as Ally dashed at Technus. The villain jabbed his trident, but Ally jumped and ran up the handle. Technus smacked Ally off, but Miko had already flipped into the air to punch the villain’s face. Ally ran behind to bite Technus’s tailfin, the ghost yelling as he tried to shake her off.

“Don’t think we aren’t used to rogue A.I.!” Five declared as he and Miko fired a beam that caused Technus to glitch up. He was flickering between his and Sayu’s colors, but the ghost released a burst that pushed the kids away.

“Your technology is quite ‘dope,’ but it ‘ain’t’ got ‘jack’ on me!”

“His slang sounds so wrong!” Miko yelled as Ally flipped her back on her back. Both kids dodged digi-fish and lasers, and the Ghost Sticks were forcing the citizens to attack Hiro and Go-Go. Technus grabbed Five and tried to squeeze the boy, but Ally carried Miko up as she rose and smashed her hammer over Technus’s arm. Technus spun to whack Five and Ally away, but Miko grabbed onto his tail and fired the Derez Beam at his back. Technus slammed his tail down to stop her, followed by a stab from his trident to force her off. The digital weapon didn’t puncture Miko, but the impact left her dizzy. Technus pinned the trident against Miko to keep her bound to the stage.

“Now, as the gamers say, I am going to ‘own’ you like a personal possession! Zzzzzttt!” The villain began glitching once more. “Aaaaahh! No! The Flashdrive! Someone is wrongfully Ejecting the Flashdrive! You’re supposed to click the Eject button before pulling it out of the—ZYAAAAAAHHH!” The giant mermonster poofed into pixels and disappeared off the stage with all the other graphics. (End song.)

As Five ran to help Miko up, Hiro and Go-Go were nearly finished destroying all the Ghost Sticks, with local officers arriving to assist them. “Can’t you newbs figure anything out for yourselves?” Five and Miko turned to face a blonde, dark-skinned boy as he marched out from backstage. He wore white and gray tech armor with a pink visor and “H” on the chest. “When dealing with rogue Programs, always go for the source.” He tossed the Flashdrive up in his hands. “Luckily, while you guys were distracting it, I managed to rescue the animators and derez this glitch. This flashy mermaid should be back to normal… in about a day.”

“Don’t worry! We have a backup Sayu ready!” one of the animators said from the doorway, a short human with rectangle glasses. There were three others: a blue alien with a darker-blue uniform and sword on his back, a larger chubby humanoid with swirly glasses and umbrella hat, and a cyan-skinned girl with glasses and red hoodie.

“Holy cow! That’s Mitch Williams!” the chubby boy perked up. “I watch his Let’s Play videos! Hwow, I can’t believe we were saved by him!”

“Hey, we helped, too!” Five argued. “And what’re you doing here anyway, Mitch? You got a thing for Sayu?”

“As if I would ever fall in love with a digital fish-puppet.”

“Pbblth.” Miko blew a raspberry. …She glanced at the animators and particularly noticed the hooded girl. “Wait, are you the singer?”

“!” The girl flinched and retreated into the building.

“Wait! I want your auto-”

“Not so fast, Miko.” Mitch grabbed her shirt before she could run off. “The reason I’m here is to bring you exciting news.” He released Miko as the girl compliantly turned to face him. The Sector Leader bore a proud smile as he announced, “Hinobi Tech is officially branching out to other galaxies!”

“You came here just to tell us that?” Five questioned.

“As I speak, new stores have already been established on Planet Earth in the Milky Way Galaxy. Employees are signing up to be transferred to Earth and manage the stores. But, considering the vast distance between this world and Earth, you can imagine why they would want to move their whole families. And guess who I signed up~?”

Kubota Household

“WE’RE MOVING?!” Miko screamed at her parents with utter exasperation.

“Well… yes.” said her father, Hugh, an average man with blonde hair and a green shirt. “We… thought you already knew?”

“Your friend, Mitch told us weeks ago.” her mother, Mayumi followed. She was a half-Japanese woman with a pink shirt. “Well, it actually went like…”

“Wait, Miko hasn’t told you, yet?” Mitch asked innocently. “Oh, darn! She must be planning to surprise you, I think I ruined it!”

“Ha ha, it’s okay!” Mayumi smiled. “We’ll pretend we didn’t hear anything.”

“NO! NO NO NO, push that Reset button!” Miko yelled, mashing an invisible controller. “I didn’t sign up for ANYTHING! Mitch did it behind my back, that cocky little dick!”

“Miko! Language!”

“I just said ‘dick’! At least I didn’t call him the ‘B’ word; you know, the one that rhymes with ‘Mitch’!”

“Wait, is that why you boxed up all my karate trophies?” asked Lexi, Miko’s 11-year-old sister. She wore a standard karate robe and black hair in a ponytail. “Not so they wouldn’t get dusty?”

“No, it’s ’cause they were all bronze trophies and lame!” remarked Lee, the 5-year-old brother.

“Lee!” Hugh scolded. “Sigh, but we wanted to surprise you, too. And we’ve kind of already started packing. We’re supposed to leave in a week, right?”

“No!” Miko yelled. “We can’t leave! What about Kids Next Door? You expect me to just fly back-and-forth between galaxies all the time?”

“Doesn’t Earth have a KND?” Mayumi asked.

“But all our friends and family are here! And our jobs!”

“Well, actually, I already talked with my boss about it.” Hugh said. “They have toothpaste factories down on Earth, so he promised to put in the good word for me. We’ll settle in in no time!”

“But…but why?” Miko grew more downtrodden with each rebuttle. “Don’t you like it here?”

“It’s not that we don’t,” Mayumi answered, “but when we looked into it, Earth’s homes seem much more affordable than Coruscant’s. Plus, there’s prettier skies, prettier grass, prettier oceans… it’s like all of Galaxia’s planets mixed into one!”

“We’ve been under a lot of stress lately, to be honest.” Hugh said. “Not just your mother and I, but your siblings, too. Maybe we just need to escape from the big city and settle down in the small city.”

“Still bigger than Kateenia, so it’s fine with me.” Lexi shrugged. “Ugh, can’t believe I lost a match to a dumb Kateenian…” she mumbled under her breath.

“Thiiirrrd plaaaace…” teased Lee, his sister growling in spite.

“But, I…I don’t wanna move.” Miko moaned, bowing her head and facing away from her parents.

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry that you didn’t know.” Mayumi placed a hand on her shoulder in sympathy. “But I think this will be a fun new experience for you. See some new things, make some new friends… and you can always play with your old friends online. Besides, if Earth’s KND has their own spaceships, you can visit them once in a while.”

“Yeah, but it’s so far awaaaayyy…” Miko slumped against the wall as she brushed her way to the door.

“Well, you probably have some good-byes to make.” Hugh said. “Be home soon, kiddo.”

“Yeah…” She lazily shoved open the door and left.

Five and Mitch awaited her outside, the latter sporting his cocky smile. “Well, it was nice knowing you, newb.” Mitch said. “I could have signed Five away, but I decided, I tolerate him slightly more than you.”

Miko shot him a deathly glare. “Get out of here, you little… B-word.”

“Pfft. Don’t even know what that is…” Mitch walked away on that remark.

Five glared as well, but turned to Miko with sympathy. “I’m sorry this happened, Miko. I’m gonna miss you.”

“I’ll miss you, too. …Wait, why don’t you sign up to move, too? Then we can both still work together!” The shorter gamer perked back up.

“Yeah, but… to be honest, I don’t really wanna leave either. I wanna stay and look after my dad’s store… plus, it’d be harder to schedule visits for him in prison if I’m… in another galaxy.”

“Yeah… that’s true.” Miko’s hope faded like her smile. “I… guess this is it for us. Except online.”

“I’ll visit you, too. Come on, Meeks, it won’t be so bad.” Five smiled hopefully. “I heard a lot of cool stories about Earth. It has some of the best operatives. They conquered New Galaxia and everything!”

“I know, but… I feel like you were the only friend that’s ever understood me. You’re the only one that likes to spend time with me, despite my… problems.”

“Pfft, problems, what problems?”

“Uh, my focus issues, my hastiness issues, my rudeness issues… all of which people commonly point out. Including you.”

“You’re forgetting Ridley. She understands you, too.”

“She’s also a rogue hacker who’s always on the run. Not exactly easy to hang out with.”

“Okay, but putting the problems aside, you’re also a fun person to be around, and a dependable teammate. Whichever team you wind up in, they’ll be glad to have you.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah! But if that ain’t enough, maybe you can think of it like… a quest.”

“A quest?”

“A quest to join the best of the best! To represent Coruscant in the top Kids Next Door!”

“A quest to join the best? That sounds like the best quest!”

“You ready to take on brand new challenges with brand new friends in this brand new quest??”

“More like a newb quest!” Mitch called.

Miko shot him a glare. “Sign me up! We’ll see how Mitch feels when I’m hangin’ with the best!”

“Yeah!” High Five dealt her a double high-five!

KND Moonbase; three days later

Miko was brought to Earth’s Moonbase personally by the Coruscant KND’s Supreme Leader, Sasha Phyronix. Sasha was a Cazar (a brown-furred feline alien) with a lilac and dark-purple suit with golden highlights.

Both operatives met with Earth’s leader, Cheren Uno, in his office. As they discussed the circumstances, Cheren was handed a file describing Miko’s history. “Hehe, this is a wild one, isn’t she?”

“According to Mitch’s reports,” Sasha said, “Miko has trouble with following orders and tends to act recklessly.” The girl in question grinned sheepishly. “But Numbuh High Five and their other sectormates have spoken favorably about her… with slight agreement to the contrary.”

“Ah, that’s no biggie. We have tons of operatives like that. We’d be happy to have her!”

“GREAT!” Miko jumped, startling Sasha and her sensitive ears. “Put me in the best sector ya got!”

“Uhh, Sector V has enough members.”

“Then the second best!”

“Sector W7 also has their max.”

“The third!”

“Well, Sector W technically has a spot open, but adding a 16-year-old would ruin their ‘youngest members’ theme. Heh…”

“Uuuugh! Just drop me in whatever sector’s good! Ya know, as long as it’s a good one!”

“As Supreme Leader, I think all my sectors are good.”

“You know what I mean! Just… I dunno, put me in a sector that would like someone like me.”

“I mean, that’s all a matter of opinion at that point. Hmmm…” Cheren looked at the file. “But considering where your shop is gonna be stationed, I have an idea where to place you.”

“Okay! Who ya got for me?”

August 12…

Miko’s family had gathered all their things and began to unpack in their new home on Earth. During this time, Miko set foot in the treehouse that would be her new sector. A new home and new friends were about to be made here at Quahog, Rhode Island.

Confetti was fired around the living room, a banner welcoming Miko unraveled, and four of her five new teammates popped open soda bottles and flung them upward as the fizz erupted. “HAPPY NEW TEAMMATE DAAAAAY!” The kids of Sector Q raved! Drake Puncture, the handsome leader with sunglasses and a hook hand; Quill Ramsey, a short boy with a black sweater, white shorts, and brown shoes; E. Carmine, the only girl with no soda to drink as she wore a brown gas mask and brown contamination suit; Eddy Flores, a scrawny nerd with hi-tech glasses and brown hair; and Jenny Strongarm, a girl with a dark-yellow shirt, pink biker helmet over her messy brown hair, and dark-yellow roller-blades.

“We finally hit our sixth member!” Drake cheered.

“And an alien to boot!” Carmine cheered.

“I expected her to look less human.” Eddy said.

“Who cares? An alien’s still an alien!” Jenny declared.

“Welcome to Sector Q, Numbuh K.O.!” Quill greeted.

Miko let out a chuckle. She had never gotten such an ecstatic reception before, not even when she won the highest scores in Sock ’Em Rockers. She almost felt like their enthusiasm was a little forced; either that, or they were just that crazy. If that were the case, Miko thought she could really warm up to them. “And actually, it’s Me_K.O.!” And she socked Quill in the gut.

“OOF! My mistake…cough.”

“Nice, another tough girl!” Jenny said. “Now we’re perfect!”

“Perfection is my middle name!” Miko boasted. Thus, the beginning of her new Sector Quest commenced!

Part 2: An Eyesore of a Glitch

“So I said, ‘Mitch, I don’t care how many subscribers you got, you’re just a whiny little bitch!’ Yeah, I said it!” Miko boasted, chilling on the couch between Eddy and Drake. The sectormates were chowing on pizza, except for Carmine, who merely sipped water through a straw. “Like man, I’m glad to be away from that guy.”

“Eh, I wouldn’t hold my breath.” Jenny remarked, the roller-blader sitting on the backrest of the couch. “Drake can be really full of himself.”

“Only ’cause my team is the coolest~” Drake said coolly.

With Drake Puncture, Numbuh 3-Hole Puncher, being 15 years old, he was a year younger than Miko, but the Sector Leader nonetheless looked the part of a cool and collected dude. His short black hair was kind of spiked, and his sunglasses hid his clear blue eyes. He was rather trim and muscular under his green T-shirt and khaki pants, but what really distinguished him from a typical high school jock was his mechanical right hand.

Numbuh 2-Shot, Quill Ramsey, was 13 years old, though he hit a snag in his growth somewhere and was left as the shortest member, being waist level with Miko and Drake. He was the 4x4 technology officer as well as the vice-leader.

Eddy Flores, Numbuh Record, served as the spy and computer hacker. Under his big, hi-tech glasses, he seemed like an average, 12-year nerd with pale-blue shirt, black shorts, and blue shoes, his brown hair messy. His skinny build implied little room in the combat department.

E. Carmine, Numbuh Caution, was a pyrotechnician covered completely in her brown suit, rough to the touch. Despite her covered and muffled form, the 12-year-old girl possessed a lively and positive aura.

Jenny Strongarm, Numbuh Hundred Steps, acted as the “big sister” of the group (though now the middle sister), a thin, but tough and confident-looking sports girl. She seemed to stay balanced on her roller-blades and bore the tone of a tomboy. Miko hoped to bond well with the 14-year.

“Still, Hinobi Tech, huh?” Drake asked. “They managed your sector back on Coruscant? That kinda breaks tradition a bit.”

“They mostly just wanted to advertise their tech.” Miko shrugged. “But like, it’s cool! Check THIS baby out!” She clicked her gauntlet and materialized Ally.

“Yo!” Jenny yelped. “You had an ostrich in that thing?!”

“It appears to be a solid hologram.” Eddy observed, going up to poke the bird. Ally paid him no mind and pecked at the floor. “Are you a computer expert, too?”

“Nope, just a hardcore gamer. Don’t know how it’s made, but I know how it’s played. You guys gamers?”

“Eddy more than the rest of us.” Quill answered.

“I’m with Nintendo all the way!” Eddy beamed. “Even though they STILL won’t give us Mother 3. It’s been almost 30 years, just give us an official translation!”

“Well, sounds like your chance to check out some Hinobi titles! Lemme just dig out the ol’ Hinobi Box…” Miko raced over to a pile of crates that the W.A.T.C.H.B.O.T.s helped load in. “Nope, nope, not here, not this one, bingo!” She successfully retrieved the white console, imagining an 8-bit jingle to go with her victory. “Aha, it’s still got Castlestein in it! Now I’ll just hook it up to the tele and…” Miko walked up to the TV with the cord ends held. “…?” She scanned the TV confusedly. “Where’s the HD-SP-XIV adapter?”

“Theeeee what?” Jenny asked.

“I’m not sure what kind of TVs Coruscant has,” Carmine replied, “but ours might be a bit… different.”

“No, we can’t have this!” Miko panicked. “Wait! The store will have what we need! Hinobi must be selling Earth TV adapters, of course! Everyone, to Hinobi Stop!” She thrusted a finger up determinedly.

“Yo, chill, Gamegrl.” Jenny stylishly rolled backwards on her roller-blades and put an arm around Miko. “We can worry about that stuff later. Tell us about some of your missions. If you’re a Coruscanti, I bet you were involved in the Tachyon incident, right?”

“Well, not exactly.” Miko replied modestly. As they talked, Eddy walked behind them and crouched down to study the Hinobi console. “I wasn’t an operative back then, but like, I was SO sick of hearing my mom harping on about Tachyon!” Eddy rubbed his chin curiously and began using tools to take apart the device. “Like, I get it, he was a bad guy, he tried to destroy the city and stuff, but I just don’t care about politics, and it’s not like she was gonna do anything.”

“Yeah, I can feel ya there.” Jenny replied. Eddy began taking parts out of his Nintendo NX and attaching it to the Hinobi Box. “Problem is, with this job, you’ll have to take on evil politicians every once in a while.”

“That’s why I dig it! The KND is just like videogames, ya know, just point out the boss, get to the boss, and take out his HP, nice and simple.”

“It isn’t always that simple.” Carmine inputted, her muffled voice somber behind her gas mask. “If you’re not careful, something terrible could happen. Just look at me. I was-”

“Hey, what’re you doing to my console?” Miko asked, having just glanced back and down at Eddy.

“Oh, I think I found a solution!” Eddy replied. “I attached parts from my NX to the Hinobi. We can use the NX’s cables to hook up to the TV and probably play it.”

“Don’t just tinker with my console without asking me!”

“Sorry! Look, I’ll buy you a new one if something goes wrong.”

“Well, whatever fires this baby up faster, the better.” Miko shrugged, pushing the Power button. “I mean, no way it would fry up just from a-”

The console began sparking from the foreign components, the TV sizzling with static. “Unless… that happens.”

A pair of large, boney hands emerged from and grabbed the rims of the TV. A digital, skeletal monster in a hood hissed grimly at the operatives. Eddy frightfully scooted back on his rear, Miko and Jenny stepping and rolling back as well. The beast stomped on the floor and used a shovel to tear off part of the wood floor and fling it at them, Miko and Jenny jumping apart. “It’s the Gravekeeper!” Miko exclaimed.

“This feels like a very realistic game!” Drake yelled.

“Where’s the instruction booklet?!” Quill panicked.

Miko sneakily turned away, whispering into her wristwatch. “Hey, BITT, it’s me, Miko. So, like, I’m in my new KND sector, and you-know-what is happening. Y’know, glitch?”

“As you should have been properly instructed, your job is to eradicate and reprogram all faulty Programs with the use of your Hinobi Tech gauntlet!” replied a cheery robot voice. “You must also make sure to mind-wipe all non-Hinobi employees who bear witness to the faulty product. By selecting the ‘Mind Wipe’ function and aiming the flash at the targets in question, all things relating to ‘Hinobi Errors’ will be-”

“Yeah yeah, about the mind-wiping part, that doesn’t include teammates, right?”

“Hinobi must maintain a strong reputation with its customers! All non-affiliated sapient witnesses who witness Hinobi malfunctions must be mind-wiped to maintain a strong relationship with our customers.”

“Hey, newbie!” Jenny yelled, swiftly rolling around the pixelly monster as she threw momentum-powered kicks against its skull. “You gonna show us how this game works or not?!”

“I mean, it’s a pretty standard boss!” Miko said, shooting lasers from her gauntlet. “Just deplete its HP and it’ll go down!”

“Sounds fine to me!” Drake changed his hook hand into a harpoon and launched it at the Gravekeeper, piercing it, then hauling the monster up to slam it to the floor. Quill drew out a pair of rectangular guns and shot fire over the Program. The Gravekeeper detached and chucked the point of his shovel at Quill, who dodged, but just as the beast conjured a new point, Miko raised her purple hammer and smashed it over its skull head. The Program began blinking, so Miko fired a ray over the Hinobi console. In a matter of seconds, the monster derezzed out of existence.

“Okay, what the heck was that?!” Eddy asked, scrambling up to the consoles and beginning to detach the NX parts from the Hinobi. “That’s the last time I tinker with alien game consoles! Man, I hope this doesn’t ruin my NX.”

“I’m sorry I have to do this, but…” Miko aimed her gauntlet at Eddy.

“Do what?” Eddy looked up at her—but in the next second, there was a blinding flash!

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0…

Eddy was lost in another dimension. Everything was bright, everything was neon, and his brain and body were like liquid, lost in the neon waves.

<><><><><><><><>

“AAAAAHHH!” Eddy let out a scream and grabbed his head, writhing on the floor. “AAH! I’M BLIND! What happened to me?!”

“Eddy!” Jenny panicked, kneeling down to hold her squirming friend. “Miko, what did you do that for?! He’s photosensitive!”

“W-What’s that mean?”

“His eyes are sensitive to bright lights! His glasses are designed to shade in bright areas, but if you just flash him like that…”

“Oh…” Miko bit her lip in guilt. “Then, could you turn him away for a second?”

However, her gauntlet was immediately frozen by Quill’s Elementor gun, using the ice setting. Drake caught Miko in a lasso before jumping to pin her down. “What’re you doing with that, anyway?!”

“Yeah, why did you do that to Eddy?!” Carmine asked.

“No, please! I can explain! I wasn’t trying to hurt him, I just…”

“Is that Miko?” Eddy asked. “What do you mean she did this? I was just checking out her console!”

“Yeah, and it brought some creepy skeleton dude to life.” Drake said.

“What skeleton dude? What happened?”

“The monster that just attacked us! Don’t you remember?” Jenny asked.

“We were… attacked?”

“…” Quill glared and aimed a gun at Miko. “Did you do something to his memory?”

“You better start explaining or it’s the Arctic Prison for you.” Drake stated.

“Let’s bring Eddy to his room.” Carmine suggested. Jenny lifted the boy and rolled toward the hallway, the others following.

Eddy was lain on his bed as Carmine brought eye drops to drip onto him. His squirming began to subside. “Okay, so, the truth is… Hinobi’s games tend to glitch from time to time, and, well… come to life and attack people. It’s something to do with the kind of hardware they’re using, trying to make games more interactive. So, whenever this happens, naturally KND operatives have to deal with it, but Hinobi doesn’t want word to spread too much about it, so… that was part of their deal with the KND. They hired us ‘special’ operatives to help mind-wipe people of Hinobi’s flaws.”

“So, it’s some kind of secret identity thing?” Jenny asked. “Come on, dude, that stuff is outdated! And besides, we’re Kids Next Door, too, and we only decommission traitors!”

“Well, I called and asked, but you guys aren’t exempt. They said I had to mind-wipe you in case of…”

“No no no, that’s where you gotta draw the line.” Drake shook his head. “First of all, besides the traitor thing, memory-wiping is a little taboo in this profession. One of the KND’s guidelines is that experience and knowledge leads to strength, so if you just wipe our minds of every battle, we ain’t gonna get any stronger. And secondly, you don’t just keep these kinds of things a secret from your own teammates. If there’s a burden you have, at least cue us in on it. Then we’ll decide whether we wanna stress over it and help you out.”

“And honestly, I only just heard of Hinobi,” Jenny said with a shrug, “so I don’t care if they have a bad reputation. Especially if THIS is what their tech does. At least Cheren’s excuse is just ‘I just didn’t want my operatives to worry’ or something, but like, why even try to defend some faulty game company?”

“But if I don’t do my job, Hinobi said they would fire me, and they’d convince the KND to kick me out, too.”

“Is Hinobi really that important to you?” Quill asked.

“It’s just, ever since I was little, all I’ve ever been good at is videogames. I got held back a grade one year, I needed a lot of tutoring, then my parents just decided to home-school me. And now they’re proud that I have a job and I’m doing something that matters for the world. It isn’t just about Hinobi… but come on, I swear their games are good, we just gotta-”

“I could really care less about that part.” Eddy stated. “You know, Nintendo always had a problem with trying to make their games too perfect, getting rid of all the fun glitches, but at least they don’t FLASH their customers and try to make them forget! If this is how they treat people, they don’t deserve anyone’s business. Do they even ask if people have a medical condition before flashing them? I guess not!”

“I mean, you said you were a gamer, so I didn’t expect you to have sensitive eyes.”

“My glasses help me tolerate lights and enjoy what I love. But now I might never get to play again.”

“I’m sorry! Is there any way I can help?”

“Relax, Eddy, it’s not nearly as bad as when Sheila flashed her fist at us once.” Jenny said. “Your eyes will be better by tomorrow.”

“Yeah, well I still think I’m owed some compensation. Why don’t you flash yourself right in the face and see how it feels?”

“Come on, don’t make her mind-wipe herself.”

“It doesn’t really work on me.” Miko said.

“What doesn’t work?”

“Well, like, check this out.” Miko stepped away. “Actually, don’t look, but I’ll let you know.” She aimed the gauntlet at herself, and the others looked away as the gauntlet flashed.

Miko experienced a similar wavy, neon sensation full of ones and zeroes. But it was then that a digital barrier popped up around her, the space sparking and glitching. She was pulled back into reality as her gauntlet flashed a red ERROR message. “See? It doesn’t work on me.”

“Huh…why is that?”

“Beats me. I guess I just got a sharp mind is all!”

“Well, this feels unsatisfying.” Eddy said.

“Well, do you want me to pour hot water in my eyes or something?” Miko asked in slight frustration. “I said I was sorry, I didn’t know.”

“If you knew Hinobi’s games could endanger us like that, you shouldn’t have tried to hook it up in the first place. So, I hope you aren’t expecting to play it any time soon.”

“But they’re really good, I swear they are!”

“Do I look like I care to listen?”

Miko sighed. “Should I just leave? I’m just causing you guys trouble.”

“Losing a newbie on the first day after one little mistake?” Drake asked, raising his hook like a question mark. “That’s seriously lame.”

“What’s your true allegiance, anyway?” Quill asked, the shortest boy looking up with strict eyes. “Is it Hinobi or the KND?”

“I mean…” Miko rubbed her arm anxiously, “it’s because of Hinobi that I’m even in the KND. And because of that, I had friends who liked to spend time with me.”

“Cool, but we don’t really care about Hinobi.” Drake folded his trim arms confidently. “Even if they fire you, we’d still keep you around! Cheren wouldn’t listen to those pricks, and even if they try to wipe our memories, we have timebenders and psychics who are immune to that shit! Aren’t they?”

“I think so.” Quill shrugged.

“So… you don’t want me to leave?”

“I’d be willing to let her stay.” Carmine replied. “Having new friends is always nice! …If it’s alright with Eddy.”

“…” The bedridden boy was silent for a moment. “She can stay, under a few conditions. One, we limit time with the Hinobi console so it doesn’t always try to kill us, and two, she never uses that flashy thingy again.”

“Okay, but what if other people start encountering glitches?” Miko asked. “If I don’t do my job, we might get in trouble with Hinobi, too.”

“Hmm…” Drake tapped his hook to his head. “I don’t really agree with the mind-wiping thing, but we can probably agree to play along. Maybe. But don’t think about using that thing on us. Not on other operatives and especially not Eddy, and if Hinobi doesn’t like that, they can try to take us on.”

“Yeah, we ain’t afraid of some third-rate developers!” Jenny fist-palmed. “We’ll protect our new sister ’til the end!”

“Heh…sister?” Miko blushed.

“Do you agree to Eddy’s terms or not?” asked Quill.

“Y-Yes! I agree. Thanks, for letting me stay.” Miko cracked a nervous smile. “And I’m sorry for flashing you, Eddy.” She walked up to the boy and patted his chest. “I hope you’ll still want to play games with me after this.”

“I’ll consider it… provided I get a mocha slushy.”

“YOU GOT IT!” Miko declared. The prompt, Side Quest: Mocha Slushy of Friendship appeared above her!

Miko proceeded to race out of the room, her new friends following, except for Carmine as she chose to look after Eddy. “Wait, if you’re immune to the mind-wipe, maybe you’re a timebender or something!” Drake said.

“I don’t have any bending that I’m aware of. Unless you count my scorebending!”

“Let’s see how that matches with my rollerbending!” Jenny cheered.

Carmine smiled under her mask. “I’m sure we’ll get used to her. At least now our team feels balanced!”

“I guess so. But still… I feel like doing some investigating on this Hinobi.”

Coruscant; Hinobi H.Q.

The Core of Hinobi Tech was a large, green, cubical generator. The hundreds of cords attached to it branched out into millions more cords, connected to every computer, every hard-drive, and every console. A husky woman inspected the Core, writing something on her clipboard. “There are reports of a hacker trying to infiltrate our network. They’re a rather frequent visitor… you wouldn’t happen to be letting them in, would you?”

The box seemed to spark and blink, a pair of square blue eyes flickering in it.

“Oh ho ho! Of course you wouldn’t. Still, it seems that our subject has moved to Earth. I suppose that means they’ll start encountering a surplus of glitches. We only need a bit more time until our game is complete. Still, Earth’s Kids Next Door is known to be… rather nosey in other people’s business. Perhaps we shouldn’t have permitted her to go. Hmmm…for now, we’ll just watch what happens.” With that, she calmly exited the room.

Part 3: Eternal Scars

Bomb Factory; four years ago

Sector Q had learned of a factory that was manufacturing bombs made of a toxic waste. The poisons came from an unknown source, but the factory was run by Professor Chang, a Russian Brotherhood scientist in a white suit.

Eddy Flores was the first to infiltrate the factory, stealthing past the guards to reach the Security Stations. He used his hacking skills to disable the alarms and communications, as well as open doors for his teammates to enter. The guards swarmed the operatives and fired red laser guns, but the four were quick dodgers as Drake shot his harpoon to disarm them and Quill shot ice to freeze them. Jenny was the trickiest target, fast on her skates as her feet flew up to bash the minions in the heads.

1. Carmine broke away from the others to regroup with Eddy. Carmine had puffy brown hair in a small ponytail, her eyes wide and pink. She wore a white frilly dress with bombs attached all around it, with white strap-on shoes. Carmine threw bombs to guards up ahead, exerting enough explosive force to KO them without serious injury. “We’ll find the Toxic Core in just a few turns!” Eddy indicated the map.

“I’ll blow it to smithereens!” Carmine declared, her smirk radiating with confidence.

The core appeared to be a large pumping mechanism with several pipes of toxic gas attached. “Just attach your timed bombs near the pressure points so we can get outta here. I’ll reseal the barrier, too.”

“Let’s get to it!” Carmine raced to the core and began to attach bombs around various points. Once she was finished, Carmine pushed a remote to start a ten-minute timer, and Eddy inputted a code to seal the core under a large gate. The duo began to race out of the chamber, but just as Eddy left first, a door suddenly separated the two. “Ahh! Eddy!” Carmine banged on the door in panic.

“Carmine!” Eddy yelled.

“Just where do you urchins think you’re going?” Professor Chang yelled from a windowed control center above the room. “If you’re planning to destroy my factory, it’s only fair you go with it!”

Carmine gasped and tried to use the remote to disable the timers. However, the core’s barrier was too thick for the signal to reach. “No! Eddy, I can’t shut off the bombs!”

“I’ll try to get you out of there!” Eddy said, quickly tapping his keyboard. “Crap! Chang already changed the codes! AAH!” Lasers shot at him.

“Stop what you’re doing, kid!” the guards yelled, shooting lasers at Eddy. The boy scrambled to dodge in the tight space, and his computer was shot and destroyed. With no other option, he hastily dodged past the guards in search of a control room.

“Eddy!” Carmine cried in worry. She looked up at the control room and yelled, “Please, open the barrier! I’ll disable the bombs!”

“It’s too late for that, dearie!” Chang stated. “You kids have done too much damage, and I’m certain more of you will come eventually. I’ll have to abandon this factory, anyway! At least I can take a few of you with it!”

“The hell you will!” Quill broke into the room and shot plasma bullets at the scientist. Chang whipped out his own gun and countered him, but Quill’s shortness allowed him to evade, the boy dashing to shove into Chang. Quill then jumped to shove the shotgun out of his hands, followed by a quick kick to Chang’s face. “You better let Carmine out of there now!”

“You children doomed yourself by coming here!”

“And I’ll make sure you’re doomed, too!”

“Grrr! Fine, you insolent brat!” Chang pushed himself up and turned to the terminal. “Just give me a second to input the 20-digit code, then we should be…”

And in the next second, the windows were blocked by strong shutters, along with the room’s exit. “There! Now we should be perfectly safe from any nasty explosions!”

Quill leapt to strangle the scientist and haul him to the floor, bashing his head mercilessly until Chang was knocked out. “Dammit! Eddy, I’m trapped in the control room with Chang!” he yelled into his communicator.

Eddy had made it into another security room. Jenny was working to take down the guards trying to catch him. “Okay, I’ll have you out in a sec, too!”

“No, just focus on getting Carmine out of there! Chang set it up so we’ll be safe from the explosion!”

“Hurry, guys!” Carmine called into her com. “There’s not much time left!”

“Damn, 10 minutes flies way too quickly!” Drake yelled. “Guys, check the nearby closets for spare contamination suits! I don’t know if we’ll make it out on time!”

Eddy spent the next few minutes trying to hurriedly hack the system using the security room’s computer. Jenny skated in with two suits in hand. “I got some for us!”

“And I almost have the door opened!” Eddy said. “Carmine, are there any suits in there?!”

“No, I can’t find any!” Carmine called back. “There’s only a couple minutes left!”

“Couldn’t you have opened the core’s barrier so she can turn the bombs off?!” Jenny asked.

“That would’ve taken longer to hack! Okay, I think I got it! Hurry, Carmine!”

As the door opened, Carmine quickly crawled under it, but some guards were still around and trying to shoot the girl. Carmine tried to run past, but they grabbed hold in attempt to restrain her. Sadly, before she could even attempt to escape, her bombs went off.

The core exploded, breaching the barrier as the gas spread throughout the entire base. “AAAAAHHH!” Carmine cried as she became enveloped in the fumes, the force of the explosion blowing herself and the guards away.

“CARMIIIIIINE…”

Sometime later…

Carmine had no idea what happened next. She was probably in Limbo, lost in the realm between lives… but eventually, her vision was filled with the somber expressions of her four friends. Even Drake had taken off his sunglasses, exposing his despair to the waking girl. “Carmine… thank goodness you woke up.” Jenny sighed.

“Nnnnmmm…” Carmine could make out a tube around her mouth, muffling her voice. “Gys… wht hppned?”

“You were out for a month and a half.” Quill said. “It’s October 15.”

“Uh mnth? …Is evryne… uky?”

“Is everyone okay?” Drake repeated. “Well, the rest of us got the suits on in time, but we had to search through the gas to find you. Honestly… we barely recognized you.”

“After we pulled you out,” Eddy continued, “we called other operatives to help clear away the poison. Then we managed to save Quill and arrest Chang.”

“Uuu…tht’s good…”

“Yeah… anyway, you’re in pretty bad shape. Do you wanna see yourself? You’re not gonna like it.”

“…Uhuh…”

“I guess she said ‘uh-huh.’” Drake figured. With that, Jenny held a mirror up to Carmine.

Her wide pink eyes had become more pink and dry. Her lush and puffy hair was gone, and her skin had decayed to a wrinkly, pinkish, and round alien-like form. She could vaguely make out her mouth through the tube: her lips were gone, and only a few scrawny teeth remained. “Uuuuuuu…” She almost wanted to cry and scream, but couldn’t find the strength for it.

“Yeah… your whole body looks like that.” Quill explained. “Haruka helped pump the poison out of you, and we had Melody and other healers try to fix you. But nothing worked, and you were even squirming in your sleep. Apparently, you’re extremely sensitive to… well, everything. But it at least told us you were still alive. We fed you safe amounts of warm water.”

“Nnnn…uuuu…”

They assumed by her moans that she was incredibly upset. They heard the door open as Haruka walked in. “I’m back with the anxiety pills. …Did you break the news to her?”

“Yeah.” Drake said. “So, uh… when’ll she be fit to battle again?”

“What?!” Haruka gasped. “What are you saying?!”

“I mean… you said you were getting a suit ready for her.”

“That was so she wouldn’t have to stay cooped in here! It was so she could return to a relatively normal life, not go out and get hurt some more!”

“Yeah, Drake, why would Carmine wanna get back on the field after this?!” Jenny shouted.

“But, I mean…” Drake hesitated, as if he really hadn’t considered that. “Well… okay. Is that what… you want, Carmine?”

“…” Carmine only stared at them, not even sparing a moan.

“Maybe we should step out for a minute.” Jenny suggested, slowly rolling out of there.

“Hmm…” Drake grunted in guilt as he awkwardly stepped out. Quill and Eddy shared a look before following.

Haruka sat at Carmine’s bedside, putting a gentle hand over Carmine’s blanketed one and smiling. “But yeah… we made a specially designed suit with a gentle plastic interior. You can walk around or touch things without feeling a strain on your body. But you might have to get readjusted to walking again. As for your diet, I recommend mostly water and soft foods.”

“Nnnmm…cn I rlly… cme bck… lke ths?”

 “Can you really… come back? What do you mean?”

“Drke wnts mm… t’cme bck.”

“Drake wants you… Carmine, why would you want that?”

As Carmine answered, Haruka tried to make out her words more concisely: “People are gonna think I’m a freak. None of my classmates will wanna play with me. My friends will keep having to defend me, but they’ll always be away on missions, without me. Or maybe…maybe they’ll just quit, just to be with me.”

“You shouldn’t feel compelled to stay just for that.”

“But…but I don’t wanna leave. I wanna come back… for my friends. I wanna try… and be useful. When I’m a KND, I can help people. I don’t wanna stay helpless… and useless…”

“Well, even if you come back, I can’t say you won’t be picked on. …Maddy’s seen you a couple times, and… she didn’t make the most polite comments.”

“That’s okay… even if people pick on me… I don’t wanna feel useless… If I wear that suit, can I still go on missions with them?”

“In theory… yes. You couldn’t really run as fast as you used to, but wielding weapons or your bombs should still be fine.”

“Then I…I wanna come back. I don’t care… if I’m weak or sensitive… I just wanna try.”

“Okay then…” Haruka smiled understandingly. “Sorry for making you talk this much.”

A moment later, Sector Q reentered the room as Drake approached. “Soooo… I’m sorry if I made you feel pressured… Carmine. You don’t have to come back if you-”

“Don’t worry.” Haruka interrupted. “Carmine says… she wants to return.”

“Y…You do?”

“No, you don’t have to.” Jenny said. “Drake was just being inconsiderate, you should worry about getting better.”

“U…U wnt t…t’rtrn.”

“Carmine’s already decided that she wants to return.” Haruka explained. “She wants to keep being useful. Even if it’s dangerous, she wants to take the chance.”

“Are…are you sure?” Quill asked.

“Uhuh…wll you gys… lt m’ cme bck?”

“I…I don’t really know if we should.” Jenny said. “Should we let her?”

“She’ll need to get used to moving around again first.” Haruka answered. “After that… we’ll see how she does.”

“Then what’re we waiting for, let’s get her in that suit!” Drake cheered.

“You’re really inconsiderate.” Eddy said.

“Hu hu hu…” Carmine let out some laughs.

“The boys are gonna have to leave first.” Haruka said. “She’s kind of indecent.”

“Ah, good point!” Drake rushed out.

Carmine was carefully helped out of bed, trembling as she did so. She was steadily fixed into a brown suit with a gas mask. Within half an hour, she limped her way out of the medical wing, her friends supporting her. She had little vision through the dark lenses of the mask. “I can barely see… I feel so pathetic…” she spoke with a meek, muffled tone.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna change your mind?” Quill asked.

“No… I promise I’ll get better at moving. I won’t be a burden… I promise.”

“Well, we ain’t goin’ on any missions until you’re used to it.” Drake said. “But we’ll help you work on it!”

“Heh…thanks, Drake. So, what did I miss?”

“Like, A LOT!” Jenny exclaimed. “A bunch of sectors fought with Cheren’s evil opposite from the Negaverse, then we wound up in a war with some Nature Goddess! It’s still going on! She’s been dropping Reset Bomb things around the world; Sector W took out one, but we took out another, and…”

“Wow… that sounds really exciting.”

“Yeah, but… with your bombs, I bet we’d really sock it to them!”

“Y-yeah! I’ll try my best to get better!”

Present time

“And that’s basically the story…” Carmine wrapped up. By the time night had fallen, the friends were seated on the floor in Eddy’s room. They each had a cup with a frosty dessert of their choice, with Miko serving Eddy his mocha slushy.

“Aww, that’s so inspiring!” Miko cheered. “It’s so cute that Drake wanted you back!” I kinda zoned out during the mission details, but that ending part! The feels!

“Haha, yeah…” Carmine smiled, sipping water through a straw. “And because of the incident, Cheren bumped us up to the Number 6 sector. We were at Number 10 before, so… I guess risking your life does wonders for your score.”

“And now we’re in 5^th place ’cause Sector DR got fired! Woo!” Drake cheered. “Still, some operatives were complaining about it being a ‘pity win,’ so we did our best to keep our place. Luckily, Carmine got herself ready in time for Halloween. She was the only one who didn’t dress up in an actual costume, so she didn’t get hit by Dracula’s curse. I ended up acting like Captain Hook, Quill became an elf, Eddy turned into a monkey, and Jenny became a real monster truck. Carmine was the only one still normal enough to fight Dracula’s vampires.”

“Yeah, but Sandman saved the day in the end…” Carmine said modestly.

“Who cares, you were still awesome!”

“Yeah!” Miko agreed, lightly spilling part of the slushy over Eddy. “Whoops, sorry.” The boy sighed in dismay. “But seriously, you guys should be bumped higher!”

“No, the Top 4 sectors have been through way more than we have.” Carmine said. “So have the lower ones. Honestly, I’m surprised we haven’t already dropped. Maybe we do still have our position out of pity…”

“Hey, just because we aren’t Chosen Ones, it shouldn’t say any less about us.” Jenny stated. “We did a lot for the KND and I say we’ve earned our place.”

“Especially now that you got me!” Miko cheered. “I can bump our score even higher!”

“You have a mess to clean up first.” Eddy pointed.

“Heheh, I’ll be right back.”

Miko went to get a washcloth and napkins to clean Eddy’s blanket. “But don’t you have to work at that Hinobi place tomorrow?” Quill asked.

“Yeah, I do. You guys gonna come to see it?”

“Wouldn’t pass it up!” Drake said. “It’s not every day that an operative has a part-time job!”

“Knowing what just happened, I feel a little uneasy about this place.” Carmine replied. “Wouldn’t they try to mind-wipe us if something bad happens?”

“That… might be something I’ll have to bring up with the manager.” Miko said concernedly.

When time came for bed, the six teammates retired to their rooms. Carmine slipped out of her boots and gloves, leaving on her interior plastic gloves and socks. One of many things she had always missed were the cozy comfort of new socks, or the warmth of gloves on a winter day. Now her disgusting hands and feet could only accept the soulless feel of plastic. She would change them out daily, but it wasn’t enough variety. “Huuuu…” She released a sigh. She was thankful for Miko’s support, but couldn’t help but feel envious at the girl’s lush, colorful appearance. Still, Carmine enjoyed being around Miko more than certain others…

Hinobi Stop

The following day, Sector Q followed Miko to the Hinobi store, now established as the central building of a shopping center. “Boy, they really wanna stand out.” Eddy commented as they approached the wide, bright-blue, H-shaped entrance.

The inside of the store seemed relatively normal, with shelves full of games, some mini TVs and consoles where people could play demos, and a central desk area where the name ‘Hinobi’ wrapped around the blue exterior, along with the slogan, The Future Is Fun.

The group approached a chubby man at the desk. “Hey there! Name’s Miko, ready to start my new post!”

“Well, that makes one of us.” The gray-shirted man turned to them; he had light-brown hair and a beard.

REE! Miko perked up so intensely that the “Alert” sound from Metal Gear could be heard! “PHIL!!” She jumped over the desk and gripped the man in a hug. “You came with me! I knew you were gonna miss me!”

“Eh heh heh…” Phil chuckled sardonically. “Inspector 7 requested me to come and supervise you. I had no say in it. So yeah, thanks for making me leave my favorite donut shop.”

“Awwwww, it was my pleasure, Phil! So yeah, hey guys, this is Phil! My manager from Coruscant! Phil, this is Sector Q, they’re my new teammates!”

“So, you went from the D-Team to the Q-Team.” Phil remarked. “Boy, how they fall.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Quill asked.

“Ah, just a little joke.” Miko brushed off. “So anyway, Phil, I kinda wanted to go over some stuff.” She jumped topics quickly. “Like, is it okay if-”

Phil’s cellphone rang. He checked it and said, “Ugh, I gotta take this. Your uniform’s in the back, go get changed.” He walked off on that note.

“Well, feel free to check out the store, gang!” Miko said to her team as she left to go change.

Sector Q freely looked around the shop. Eddy was checking out cords and setups designed to accommodate consoles with Earth TVs. Quill was checking out games organized by series, such as Chomp Kitty, Castlestein, Smashozaurs, or Flunky Quest. “Oooo, Skidd McMarx Pro Hoverboarding 3!” Jenny swiped the game case in question as she gracefully rolled by. “There’s a game I can get behind.”

“Hey, kid!” Phil yelled. “No skates in the store! You’re gonna knock something over.”

Jenny blew a raspberry at him, skating backwards as she—“WHOA!” she crashed into a shelf and knocked some games over.

“Ugh…Miko, your new friends are makin’ a mess!”

“I’ll get it!” Miko rushed out to start putting everything back. She was wearing white pants and a light-blue shirt, her bright violet hair in a bun.

“Wow, you look way more mature now.” Quill commented. “It’s almost kinda weird!”

“I know, uniforms just feel so dorky.” Miko said. “But hey, it’s nicer than wearing an apron!”

Carmine was looking at a game titled Kill All Humans, which depicted stereotypical, round-headed aliens with bulbous black eyes shooting everywhere. “Wouldn’t this game be offensive on Coruscant?”

“Maybe it’s some kind of satire.” Drake figured.

The bell ringed as another customer walked in, a brown-haired girl with strong arms and red fingerless gloves. Her sleeveless blue top and shorts gave her the image of more of a gymnast than a gamer. “Ahoy! Welcome to Hinobi!” Miko called.

“Well, if it isn’t Maddy!” Drake greeted. “What’s up?”

“Drake?” As Maddy recognized the Sector Q members… her eyes were drawn to a particular one. Carmine, as well, turned to her. “Um…hey, Carmine.”

“…I’m gonna go.” Carmine decided, about to walk past Maddy and-

“Where ya goin’, you just got here!” Miko held her back cheerily.

“Uhhhh.” Drake put a hand to Miko’s shoulder. “She and Maddy… aren’t on good terms. I think we mentioned her during the story.”

“Oh…” Miko thinks she overlooked that part. “So, what happened?”

“Carmine, I said I was sorry.” Maddy said. “I always remember to buy stuff for your birthday, when’re you gonna stop being mad at me?”

“My pain doesn’t go away. Not just the physical pain.” Carmine turned elsewhere and walked away.

“Uhhh…” Miko drawled cluelessly. “So, something about a bad birthday? I can relate to that.”

“Maddy used to pick on Carmine after the accident.” Drake whispered. “Calling her contagious, kicking her away, and she got other classmates in on it… then she stopped coming to school for a couple months.”

“And it adds a little insult to injury when you started speaking up for Maddy.” Quill commented, the two just noticing their shorter friend behind them.

“Hey, I got dragged into space with her by that Nefarious creep. I could tell she was changing, and after all that crazy business was settled, she started trying to make up with Carmine. I told her Carmine’s birthday and her favorite toys, so Maddy always remembered to-”

“Will you guys stop talking about it?!” Carmine shouted, hearing them from across the room.

Miko bit her lip guiltily. Wanting to change the subject, she noticed the monitor Carmine was close to. “Hey, Carmine, check out this game!” She jogged over and directed her friend’s attention to it. “It’s a demo of Aincrad, a big VR project Hinobi’s been working on! It’s only on console now, but you get to customize your own avatar with, like, a million different settings! And there’s like a hundred full kingdoms to explore! Doesn’t that sound cool?!”

“Um…yeah.”

Miko frowned. “…You know, one of the cool things about games is imagining yourself as someone else. It’s a good way to take your mind off life’s stressful moments.”

“Fine, I’ll give it a try.” Carmine clicked on the monitor and brought up the avatar customizations. “Um…” Her gloves were rather thick for the smallish controller.

“How ’bout I help you?” Miko took the device. “Which of these look cool?”

“Um, I guess…”

“Carmine, what else do you want me to do?” Maddy asked. “I already beat up the kids who were still picking on you. Got detention for it, too.”

“You still don’t know how I feel. You’re always obsessed with getting stronger while I just get weaker. I can’t get strong like you.”

“But you learned Observation Haki and first aid, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, but even then… I wasn’t even brave enough to go to New Galaxia. I just knew I wouldn’t be reliable.”

“Well, there was no shame in staying behind.”

“So, you agree.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Okay, I think I made something!” Miko announced. “What do you think about this one?”

Carmine studied the avatar: it looked like a blue-robed swordswoman with a long, black ponytail, sharp fierce eyes, and a katana. “Well, it’s certainly not me.”

“Oh, did you… want it to look more like you?”

“I’m not really sure that she wants to play at all.” Eddy commented.

“Forget it, I’ll play.” Carmine took the controller to push the ‘A’ button and confirm the avatar; however, her bulky finger pushed the ‘Back’ button at the same time. “Darn it!”

In that instant, the game was confused by her choice, unsure whether she was affirming or backtracking. As a result, the device sparked as a pixelly substance began to cover Carmine’s body. “AAAH! What’s happening?! Is this part of the game?!”

“Oh, nerds!” Miko cursed, readying her gauntlet.

Hearing the commotion, Phil looked over. His eyes widened as Carmine underwent a familiar transformation. “Uh, I’m gonna have to call you back.” He said as he hung up. “Miko, take care of it, I’ll lock this place down and start mind-wiping-”

Jenny threw a kick to Phil’s belly to knock him down, leaving Drake to bind him with rope. “About that, we need to talk to you.” Drake said.

“C-Carmine!” Miko was aghast as their friend morphed into the very swordswoman she had designed. “Is that you in there?”

“I…I feel different.” The warrior spoke in a glitchy version of Carmine’s voice. “I feel… kind of nimble.” She slashed the air a bit. “And it feels kinda good!”

“Hang on, I’ll have this thing fixed in-” Miko shot the Derez Ray over the monitor, but reactively jumped away when Carmine slashed her. “Carmine?!”

“My name is Carmurai! And now that I’ve been reborn, I will seek vengeance on those who wronged me!”

“I didn’t think she was into roleplaying!” Jenny said. “And Carmurai’s a dumb name!”

“Eh, that was the name I inputted.” Miko blushed. “Y’know, it was a samurai, her name’s Carmine, so… Ahem, but I think this is a Possessor Glitch! They take control of people and turn them into whatever character they’re playing!”

“I dunno what’s going on,” Maddy said, “but how do we fix—HEY!” She dodged Carmine’s slash.

“Maddith of Malefor, you will pay for what you did to me!” Carmine viciously slashed at Maddy, but the fighter was quick to dodge her attacks.

Maddy then grabbed Carmine’s sword in her hardened hand. “Fine, if this is how you wanna settle it!” She crushed the digital sword, but Carmine jumped away as it reformed. Maddy swung her iron-hard fists at the samurai, but Carmine moved her legs in evasion. She stabbed down, but Maddy dodged right and went for the hip, but Carmine leapt and stomped Maddy’s head. Maddy endured the attack and tried to grab Carmine’s ankle in both hands, but Carmine leapt away and did a downward slash, which Maddy avoided. Maddy attempted to use Conqueror’s Haki, but the Glitch appeared resistant to the effect. And yet, when Maddy followed this with a kick to the stomach, the samurai made no effort to avoid as she slammed into a shelf of games, knocking them down.

“It’s having a hard time derezzing the system.” Miko reported, shining the ray over the console. “Maybe you guys can help beat her down a bit?”

“We could, but… I feel like we should just let Maddy handle it.” Drake figured.

“So, Carmine is partly in control.” Maddy observed. “You were avoiding my attacks before because of her Observation, but when I used Conqueror’s, her consciousness couldn’t handle it, so I could hit you.”

“I…I am Carmurai of Clamland! I will not let my honor be defiled!” She resumed slashing at Maddy, and when Maddy threw punches back, Carmine was dodging again. Maddy assumed she had recovered consciousness.

“Carmine, I’ve already apologized a bunch for how I treated you. But maybe you should start giving yourself some more credit! You may not be super strong, but you’re better than you think you are, so don’t let me make you feel ashamed!” With one last solid punch to Carmine’s stomach, the samurai fell over, her pixelly body breaking to pieces to reveal the suited girl underneath. Miko was then able to fully derez the rogue Program.

“Phew… that wasn’t so bad.” Miko smiled. “The last Possessor we dealt with was way tougher.”

“Yeah, well Maddy doesn’t pull punches herself.” Drake said. “It’s not surprising…”

“You okay, Carmine?” Maddy asked, bending over her.

“Oooooo…I feel… kinda sick now…”

“I wasn’t sure how hard I had to hit you. I didn’t want it to be too bad…”

“Well… thanks.”

“But, were you… actually trying to hurt me?”

“Not exactly… but I was awake. I dodged whenever you punched me, but the samurai did most of the attacks. But part of me… was also kind of enjoying it.”

“She’s a hella good dodger though!” Drake cheered. “Maddy had to use Conqueror’s to win!”

“I didn’t really use Conqueror’s at the end.” Maddy corrected. “Carmine hesitated on her own.”

“Yeah… I appreciated what you said.” Carmine replied.

“So, do you forgive me?”

“…No. Now I just feel embarrassed.”

“Want me to help you up?”

“I don’t want you to help me!”

“Well, I don’t wanna leave you on the floor.”

“Just move. I can… get up… if I try…” Carmine quivered as she tried to hoist her upper body up. She bent her leg to plant her shoe to the floor, trying to push herself up. “Hnnnn…there.” She put the other foot down, but had to lean on a shelf. “I get knocked around a lot on missions, I know how to help myself.”

“What a touching development.” Phil remarked. “Can you guys untie me now?”

“Eh, sorry!” Drake grinned, retracting his rope.

“Alright then…” The manager helped himself up and brushed off. “I just got a call from someone higher up. Non-Hinobi KND operatives aren’t exempt from-”

“Come on, don’t wipe their minds, Phil!” Miko pled. “You see how tough they are, they’re just as good at fighting glitches as we are!”

“I can see that, but we can’t have too many witnesses. I tried talking with corporate about this, but they said if the regular KND handle this problem too much, the customers won’t think we’re reliable enough. That’s why we have to wipe their memories, too.”

“But if you wipe their memories now, Maddy and Carmine will forget this touching experience! Besides, we can trust them to help keep the secret! They’re not gonna blab to everyone! Right?”

“Hmph…” Eddy huffed.

“I mean, we don’t have a reason to at the moment…” Quill replied, “but I still don’t know how to feel about the whole thing.”

“Phil, if more KND know about the glitch problems, they’ll be ready to help deal with it.” Miko reasoned. “Can’t we at least try to talk with them?”

“I’m not using those memory-wipe gizmos.” Eddy stated. “Not just for my eyes, but it’s just an awful practice.”

“You’re not helping my case…”

Phil released a sigh. “You know what… fine. I’ll make an exception for you guys.”

“You will?! Really?!”

“Just don’t go telling too many people, or you’ll make trouble for BOTH of us.” Phil stated strictly. “And you’d better fix these shelves, kiddo!”

“You got it!” Miko saluted and got to work.

“So, why the sudden change of heart?” Eddy asked.

“Let’s just say, I still got my own questions for Hinobi.” Phil answered. “So, it’s nice to have some leverage around.” With that, he left to the back room.

“I’m getting a lot of red flags from this company.”

“So, like, these Hinobi guys wipe peoples’ memories whenever their games come to life like that?” Maddy asked after hearing Quill’s explanation.

“Yeah, they need to ‘maintain a good relationship with their customers.’”

“Huh…how pathetic.” Maddy cracked a smirk.

“How come you’re here, anyway?” Jenny asked.

“I’m looking for a new game for Zach. He was banned from all game stores for replacing all the discs with donuts, while the real discs went to get jobs hunting foxes for robots.”

“Everything about that made perfect sense!” Miko perked up.

In his office, Phil was using a small, floating robot named BITT to hack into the building’s security network. He began deleting all footage of the incident. “There. If corporate doesn’t want anyone to know about Glitches, they don’t have to know either.”

“But Hinobi Corporate requires daily updates regarding any memory-wiped customers or potential-”

“Yeah yeah, they don’t gotta know everything. Not until I figure out why they…”

“Hey, Phil! It’s me, Phil! If you don’t remember making this video, it’s because you probably got memory-wiped by someone at the company again. Y’know… how they do that. Thankfully, BITT has enough memories for the both of us! So, when all else fails, he’ll protect the file we recovered from Hinobi’s development lab on his cartridge.”

“Why can’t you just tell me what the password is, BITT?” Phil questioned.

“Your exact orders were to never divulge your secrets to anyone, including you!”

“Sigh, me and my big brain. Well, I’ll crack my own code eventually. Just you wait.”

The Gameverse does not endorse Tony Hawk or his lame animated feature, Boom Boom Sabotage! Nah, but even bad movies deserve to be remembered. …It had pretty gross scenes though.

Part 4: Cousin Rivalry

Lincolnville

Skateboard City was an indoor skate park where the ramps towered like buildings, resembling a miniature city. The Sector Q agents watched as Jenny soared down a towering ramp, and after flying up the other side, she did a backflip, diagonal-left flip, kicked skyward three times, dealt rapid punches to either side, followed by turning upside-down and clacking her heels, and curving upright just in time to land on the next ramp. It swerved down like a whirlpool, where she performed twirls, cartwheels, then skated backwards while crouching down and kicking “forward.” She did all this while maintaining a constant turn on the spiral. Jenny then jumped off and across a set of platforms, doing jumping jacks with each one, and finally rejoined her teammates on the predestined Goal platform.

“Yo, those were some sick moves, yo!” Miko cheered. “That’s what they say, right?”

“I think so.” Quill shrugged.

“Yo, you still got the moves, Cous!” They looked up at Mike Strongarm, mounted on a bike on an overhead track. Mike wore a white and purple helmet, white T-shirt with purple sleeves, with purple pants and sneakers. “But let’s see if you can top this!”

Mike pedaled across the relatively narrow track, doing twirls on the back wheel before switching to the front. He then dropped to a perpendicular track down below, quickly recovering momentum. There were several mini ramps along this road, and he went up one, jumped with a flip, and landed back on his bike just in time to turn rightward and go up another ramp. On this jump, he flipped upside-down with his hand propped on the seat. The bike flew away from that track and onto another one, and Mike reseated as he jumped the bike and pedaled it along a curving wall. He bounced off that wall to land on a rail, staying balanced on it as he lay back against the seat, did a few sit-ups, then some yoga stretches. The rail went up a loop, so Mike leapt and did three air-rolls as his bike went over the loop and returned to catch him.

“Man, your brother’s a champ!” Miko cheered.

“Cousin, actually.” Jenny corrected.

“Ah, right, I forgot.”

“It’s actually weird because, my mom is actually his dad’s sister. But my dad had a really dumb last name, and like, no way was that gonna be my surname. Strongarm sounds MUCH more dignified!”

Drake whispered to Miko, “Her last name would’ve been Donghickey.”

“Ohhhhhh…”

Mike eventually returned to the platform, doing a sideways flip as he kicked his bike to the air, then made the full rotation to land on his feet. “That’s how it’s done, Cous!” He held his hand out to catch the bike by the wheel.

“Yeah, boast all you want. You have plenty of time to practice when you’re not on dangerous missions.”

“I’ve been on as many missions as you!”

“Then why aren’t you in the Top 10, anymore?”

“W-Well, I…I can’t help that those other sectors got better missions!”

“Yeah, but we’re still ahead of them.”

“W-Well…ugh, forget it.” Mike set the bike down in a huff.

“Aww, a little family rivalry?” Miko cooed.

“Nah, he’s just a little insecure.” Jenny teased. “Ever since we were little, he always loved to show off how much better he was on a bike. Even when I decided rollers were better, he was always determined to be better than me, but look who’s ahead on the leaderboards?”

“Yeah, well it’s not a contest, anyway.” Mike argued. “Even during the Nature War, we helped Emily destroy the factory, and you got to fight a Nature Lieutenant.”

“Yeah, and I busted my leg trying to beat Lieutenant Greenburger! That’s way more than busting a few minions.”

“Well…” Mike could make the argument that Sector Q only had their score due to Drake and Carmine’s injuries, but that seemed a little insensitive. “Fine, you got me there. But if you were just going to mock me, why’d you even invite me here at all?”

“I just wanted to show our new teammate our skills. I didn’t ask for an argument.”

“You started it!”

“Did I?”

“Oh, stir me up a chocolate milkshake, it’s the Strongarm siblings!” The source of this eccentric voice came from a light-brown-haired man in a pale blue suit and a tall, rectangular head. His voice was effeminate, and he rode on a hover pad. “And you brought your little KND buddies! Oh, the purple girl is new. Mmm, and so fresh-looking!”

“Uh, I’m not fit for eating here.” Miko said.

“What’s up, Mr. Dullard?” Mike greeted. “And I think you mean cousins. Miko, this guy’s the owner of this joint.”

“Extreme sports are the way of the future, Miko! And you Kids Next Door are proof of that! After all, nothing gets more extreme than what you kids do.”

“I always thought extreme sports were out of fashion.” Miko said.

“Only because of bad cartoons.” Jenny replied. “But some of us are still hanging in there.”

“Perish the thought!” Dullard expressed. “As the world keeps evolving, so does extreme sports! Videogames, technology, transportation, if these things can evolve, so can sports!”

“That’s kinda like Hinobi!” Miko said. “Their slogan is-”

“But listen, you kids came at the right time.” Dullard said in a more serious tone. “I need your help dealing with a couple of circus freaks.”

“Circus freaks?” Quill asked. “Well, that’s an odd request from a skate park owner.”

“These aren’t just any circus freaks, kids. These hoodlums have been on my nerves for months!” Dullard pulled up a remote and pressed it, switching on a large TV on the ceiling. It displayed images of various parks either burned to ash or destroyed. “As you can see, this has been happening to all my lovely recreational areas across the country! This is no coincidence: it has to be the work of THIS nasty group!” He switched to an image of a circus camp. “The Old Tyme Circus troupe, ooooog!”

“Uh, okay?” Eddy replied. “And do you have proof?”

“I’ll tell you the proof! Those has-been carnies are sad because they lost their license! That’s what they get for accidentally setting their tent on fire during a show! Now they’re trying to get revenge by burning down all the skate parks, leaving kids with no other source of entertainment.”

“Like videogames, playgrounds, normal parks…” Miko counted her fingers. “And some people like libraries, I think?”

“Then perhaps skate parks were just the beginning!” Dullard said. “They’ll destroy everything in their path just to lure people to their crummy circus!”

“This just sounds really weird…” Mike said. “Though I think I’ve heard reports about this. Parks going up in flames in the dead of night.”

“Has anyone gotten hurt?” Jenny asked.

“Are you kidding me?!” Dullard exclaimed. “Of course! My poor soul aches every time I wake up to the dreadful news of one of my lovely parks, taken from me! Also, I, uh, heard they hurt a puppy.”

“HUUUUU!” Miko’s face shrunk with her gasp. “NO! We have to avenge THE PUPPY!”

“Alright, let’s at least check these carnies out.” Drake said. “Before we go in guns blazing, we’ll try to gather info first. Where are they camped at?”

Hazbin Jungle; a few hours later

The circus camp was hidden somewhere in the jungle. The carnies looked like misshapen hillbillies: one was wearing a bee costume, another had a big nose and his eyes hidden under his hat, and there was a convertible with four gangster clowns driving circles around the camp. They listened to rap music as they patrolled the jungle.

Eddy saw the convertible driving around the path. Once it was close, he quickly rolled out. The car drove over him, but he latched his hands and shoes to the bottom with plunger attachments. Eddy tolerated the pounding of the beats until the car eventually came to a park at the camp. The clowns climbed out of the car as their chubby leader said, “Yo, why we have to do patrol, ain’t no one gonna come snoopin’ around no jungle! It’s ridiculous! Let’s git some pie, clowns.”

Seeing them walk away, Eddy dropped to the ground and discretely surveyed the area. Making sure none of the carnies were looking, he crawled his way behind a boulder. He steadily made his way to an orange carriage where the boss was likely stationed. Eddy crawled under the carriage and got behind it. He then climbed to the window and peeked in.

A man who appeared to be the ringleader was watching an old, mini TV. He had brown hair that stuck out in the bottom back, an orange ringleader shirt with light-brown tights, and yellow shoes. He had a long nose and tall forehead.

The vision from Eddy’s glasses was displayed on Quill’s handheld monitor. The Q operatives, along with Mike were hidden behind a rock in the jungle, near the road that the clown car drove by. “They look like they’ve seen better days.” Carmine commented. “But they don’t actually look evil.”

“Yeah, but why go hiding in the jungle, anyway?” Drake wondered.

“I dunno.” Eddy whispered. “We need more evidence… but how would-”

“’ey, Boss!” A short, pudgy cowboy-looking man kicked open the carriage door. He had a red hat with a skull, a left hook hand, and a bad left eye. “I got the gasoline! We shippin’ out tonight?”

“Brilliant, Hamshank!” the ringleader exclaimed, springing out of his seat. “Yes! Our next target is Camden Skate Park! We’ll wipe it off the face of the Earth!”

“Whoa! He’s right to the point!” Eddy silently gasped.

“’ey, Boss, I tried one of them weird fruits we got from the Brotherhood. It tasted yucky, but I can shoot milk outta mah head.” Hamshank removed his hat as a volcano of milk spurted out.

“OH, that would look marvelous for our show! The Spectacular Volcano Man! Those Brotherhooders will put us back on top, Hamshank! We’ll destroy skate parks all across the nation, nay, the world! My cousin will reap in the misery he sowed in me! Larry Grimley will be on top again!”

“Problems with his cousin?” Jenny remarked. “Pfft, that’s a coincidence.”

“Yeah.” Mike said sardonically. “Well, it sounds like Mr. Dullard was right after all. They even got it in with the Brotherhood. Should we stop them?”

“Yeah, but we shouldn’t rush in, yet.” Drake replied. “Eddy, it sounds like those carnies got Devil Fruits. Try and look around for a storage room or something. There could be shipping crates with instructions on what fruits they are or how they work. If they try to use them, we’ll be ready.”

“It’s kinda sad.” Carmine said. “I kinda like the circus. Do you like circuses, Miko?”

It was then they realized they were one player short, a digital outline left where she should be. “Miko?”

“Aaaaaahhh-YAAAAH!” The carnies looked up from their drinking when a violet-haired girl suddenly came running in on a red ostrich. “I’ll protect the game stores before you ever HURT THEM!” Miko returned Ally to her gauntlet as her purple hammer emerged, jumping to smash it down on some carnies. One of the gangster clowns chucked bowling balls with his Bowl-Bowl Fruit, and as Miko jumped them, point prompts appeared like Donkey Kong! An eyepatch carnie turned into a sky bison and flew to crush Miko beneath his six legs, and another morphed into a snot blob and slithered over to bind Miko, using his Logia Snot-Snot Fruit.

“Darn!” Drake yelled. “She’s started without us! We gotta catch up!”

“I’m on it!” Jenny began skating up the road.

“Jenny!” Mike yelled. “Guys, in here!” He held up an Infi-Cube for the others to jump in. He then mounted his bike and drove after.

The Strongarms reached the camp as the teammates jumped out. “YO, those kids jumped out of a li’l box!” one of the clowns yelled. “That’s our shtick, yo!”

“’ey, you clowns don’t steal another clown’s shtick!” the boss clown stated. “Let’s get ’em!”

Quill shot fire from his Elementors to make the bison carnie back off of Miko. He switched to ice to freeze the snot man, and Miko mustered the strength to break free of the ice. “AAAGH!” Larry Grimley cried, walking out to see the commotion. “Where did these meddling hoodlums come from?!”

“There’s the boss!” Mike and Jenny rolled over.

“Let’s ring this ringleader!” Jenny declared.

“AAAH! Hamshank! Get your bottom on me and get me out of here!” Grimley morphed into a bike with his face above the front wheel. Hamshank sat himself on Grimley’s rump-seat and pedaled Grimley’s hand-pedals. “Ooo-hoo-hoo, you’ve put on weight, Hamshank~”

Mike and Jenny raced after the carnies! As Larry and Hamshank escaped through the jungle, the henchman chugged down a gallon of milk. He took off his hat to shoot milk at the Strongarms, the cousins easily dodging the projectiles. Hamshank replaced his hook with a sword and sliced trees down, the Strongarms jumping them—Jenny nearly fell into a narrow ravine, but she spread her legs so she could skate along the sides.

Mike pedaled up a long and leaning tree to get above the carnies. He then dropped down to bounce on Hamshank’s head, dizzying the henchman as the impact caused Grimley to veer rightward. “HAMSHAAAANK!” Grimley cried as they rolled down a slope and went up a rock ramp, flying over a garden of snakes. They landed on the other side and pedaled along the edge. Mike pedaled along the opposite edge, watching as Hamshank drank beer. He shot beer blasts that Mike ducked, though he also had to jump small rocks.

Jenny had caught up, but she was rolling within the snake field itself. She was doing hop-skip techniques to stay between and evade the snakes, closing the gap to Grimley. She jumped to kick the back wheel, causing them to spin around, but they regained control of their selves and pedaled away from the snakes. Mike found a bridge to pedal over and join Jenny, the cousins chasing the villains into a cave. The cave sloped up as Hamshank tried to shoot beer within the darkness, but the cousins were prepared and swapped to Nightvision goggles. They dodged rocks in the road, and Hamshank switched to a hammer hand to bash the wall and make stalactites fall. The Strongarms rolled along the walls to avoid some of these obstacles.

They exited the cave and found their selves on a cliff area. There was a long, swervy wooden slide set up by the carnies. Grimley and Hamshank escaped down it, so the Strongarms pursued. Despite the steep momentum and the sharp turns, the Strongarms stayed balanced on the slide… that is, until Jenny flew off the side of one part. However, as she calculated, she landed on a later part of the slide, and could use the momentum to go up it. While the carnies were hurriedly fleeing from Mike, Grimley gasped when Jenny suddenly flew up for a firm STOMP to his stretched face!

The bike abruptly stopped, causing Hamshank to fly off the slide. The slide would have let off close to the camp. As Hamshank growled up at the slide- “WHOA!” he was shot by Drake’s harpoon.

“Sorry, buddy! The circus is cancelled this year!” Drake declared. Hamshank switched back to his sword hand, and Drake’s hand changed to a sword as they clashed. When Hamshank did a stab, Drake suddenly switched to a tennis racket and caught the sword, hauling Hamshank to the ground, followed by a kick to the stomach. Hamshank was forced off as Drake leapt onto his stomach and stomped the henchman’s face, KOing him.

Mike had leapt onto Grimley’s seat and worked to pedal the ringleader down the rest of the slide. “You! Get your muddy shoes off my hands!” Grimley yelled, his face now dented in the shape of Jenny’s rollers.

“I’ll happily oblige!” Within seconds, they had launched off the end of the slide. Mike performed a flip with Grimley, but instead of traditionally landing on the wheels, Mike leapt off and let him crash face-first. Grimley’s body morphed back to normal, propped upside-down with his legs bent over him.

Quill had finished defeating the sky bison carnie. The gangster clowns had gotten back in their convertible to chase after the bikers, but Eddy was clinging under the car again. He slipped one of Carmine’s bombs into the exhaust port to explode the car, the clowns flying separate directions. Carmine herself tossed Sleeping Gas bombs to weaken the other carnies, allowing Miko to KO them. “Phew! Mission accomplished!” Drake declared.

The seven operatives sent a call to Arctic Prison. A group of S.P.R.A.Y.S.H.I.P.s arrived to load the villains onboard, with Aaron and Rhilliane escorting Grimley onto theirs. “You won’t get away with this, you meddlesome kids! I know Dullard put you up to this! I’ll get back at both of you! Before you even know it! And I’ll kick your meddling bottoms!”

“Man, I was thinking the author would never remember us.” Aaron remarked, pushing Grimley into the cell and closing it.

“Our next chapter will probably be another five years.” Rhilliane said.

“Man, it’s refreshing to fight regular villains once in a while!” Miko exclaimed.

“What kinds of villains do you fight?” Mike asked.

“Uh…you know!”

“Anyway, those were wicked moves you were pulling, Cous!”

“Yeah, it’s safe to say I won this one!” Jenny beamed.

“Uh…you were supposed to compliment me.”

“Well, driving up that tree was pretty cool, plus the way you finished him off. But you couldn’t have done that without me~”

“Yeah, that’s what teamwork is all about. We both did our part.”

“I reckon!”

“Y-Yeah, we… forget it.”

“Come on, stop being awkward, you two!” Miko got between them with arms wrapped around either. “Let’s get back to Skateboard City! I barely even got to show off my moves!”

“We have to file a mission report to Global Command.” Quill said. “Well… I guess this mission came from Mr. Dullard, not Moonbase… so, I guess we could go there first.”

“I still got a bit of skate in me!” Drake agreed. “Let’s go!”

…

However, as Aaron and Rhilliane were making the flight to Arctic Base, Grimley turned his left pinky into a metal bike wheel string. He stuck it into the lock of his handcuffs and picked around until they came off. The carnie snickered evilly as he then picked the cell vent. He quietly crawled up to the unsuspecting 45 cousins. “YAAAH!” He turned his hands into bike wheels that he used to strangle the cousins. “Now you better fly this thing to Skateboard City or I’ll have your NECKS!”

“AACK! Okay! Okay!” Aaron squirmed.

Skateboard City

“YAHOOOO!” Miko performed a diagonal back-flip before landing on the rail, maintaining excellent balance. “This rocks!”

“Whoa, Miko!” Jenny yelled. “Have you always been this good?!”

“At skateboard/hoverboarding games?! Yeah! I just took a page from them!”

“Nice! I’m glad she’s on MY team, eh, Mike?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mike asked. “You hoping she’ll boost you up to Number 1 or something?”

“You never know, she could!”

Mike sighed, walking away from her. “Okay, I’m sorry!” Jenny rolled after. “You’re right, you were a big help in that battle.”

“Honestly, you make me feel like I’m useless most of the time. Ever since you outranked me, you tease me about it, talking about how much cooler your missions are… and now that I got bumped down below those other sectors, it makes it even worse.”

“Well, it’s just… you always like to show off your biker skills and you always beat me at this stuff, so… I guess I just feel a bit competitive…”

“Well…” Mike thought back to another point he wanted to make. “You know part of the reason your sector has that score is because of Drake and Carmine’s accidents, right? So, when you boast about it, you’re basing it off their pain.”

“Er…I… guess you’re right.” Jenny bit her lip guiltily.

“I get that my teammates didn’t live through anything like that, but that’s no reason to brag about it.”

“Fine, I get your point. Just… forget the whole thing.”

“Mmm-mmm, ain’t that the finest news I heard in ages!” Mr. Dullard expressed after the others gave him a recap. “I never have to worry about those messy circus animals ever again!”

“There’s one thing I don’t quite understand.” Eddy said. “Why were they only attacking skate parks? And… was it just your skate parks in particular?”

“Oh, don’t question the thought processes of circus people. People who don’t think of the future can barely think at all! Hoo hoo!”

The operatives shared a curious glance. “Y’know, there was one other thing he said that was a bit weird.” Drake said. “He said that-”

The wall BURST open as the S.P.R.A.Y.S.H.I.P. came crashing onto the floor! The operatives ducked from the sudden event, with Miko slowing down in shock. “AAAAAHHH!” Grimley leapt out of the ship, the Doblemitz cousins in his wheeled hands. He slammed them to the floor before stomping toward Dullard. “JOHN! I knew it was you that sent these runts after me!”

“Stop right there!” Drake and co. jumped to block his path. “You’re no match for all of us!”

“You Kids Next Door are supposed to be heroes, aren’t you? Then attack him!” He shot a finger at Dullard. “He’s the one who started it!”

“I moved toward the future, Larry!” Dullard argued. “You’re the one who’s still stuck in the past!”

“That gave you no right to destroy my dream! All I wanted was to bring smiles and laughter to the children, but you ruined it! You destroyed my circus!”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Drake exclaimed. “What’s he talkin’ about?”

“Lies, that’s what!” Dullard stated. “Hurry and bag this crook! I can’t stand the sight of him!”

“You did it, John! Admit it! You destroyed my circus! You’re the one that started the fire!”

“Larry, you wanted the silly ring of fire, and all the other silly burnie stuff, it’s no surprise that accidents would happen! It’s your own fault.”

“YOU MISERABLE… I’LL-” Larry lunged to strangle him, but Jenny flew up with her foot stretched to stop him.

“You know, there’s only one fair way to settle this.” Drake decided. “Calling Miyuki from Sector IC.”

“Huh?” Miko cocked a brow. “Why?”

“Ah, you’ll find out.” Quill nodded.

One phone call later

They made sure the adults stayed put during the time it took Miyuki Crystal to arrive. The white-haired, pigtailed timebender approached the men and placed hands to either belly.

“What do you mean you’re leaving, John?!” Larry asked, equipped with a hat and cane.

“Open your eyes, Larry, the circus is lame. Extreme sports, now THAT’S the way of the future!”

“That retired fad? What makes you think you can bring THAT back?!”

“The Kids Next Door, of course! Lookin’ at all the extreme stuff they do on the news, some kids wanna join them while most kids wanna pretend! They’ll be skateboarding up and down the parks pretending they’re in big action scenes! Even the actual operatives will wanna use them for training or something! That’s why I’m gonna make it big in the skate park business!”

“Fine! Go and dig your little skate parks! But when those kids want to rest and laugh, they’ll be flocking to the circus!”

“Heh! We’ll see about that!”

A couple years passed as both cousins moved on with their businesses. While Dullard had gotten his fair share of customers, there were still one too many people visiting Grimley’s circus. The idea greatly disgusted Dullard. Why were those many kids still into crummy circuses? Dullard felt the need to ‘save’ them and give them the exercise they needed.

So one day, Dullard snuck into the circus during one of the performances. When he saw the troupe members taking back the ring of fire, Dullard snuck out of the audience and set his plan into motion. He pulled out a lighter and discretely set the tent aflame.

“It wasn’t my fault, John! Hamshank promised they put the fire on the ring out, he wouldn’t lie to me!”

“Well, I dunno what to tell you, Larry.” Dullard shrugged. “But it looks like you’re outta business either way.”

“Just spare me a few bucks! At least enough so I can get back on track!”

“You were already off track, Larry! You chose a crummy career in circustry over the future. Now, get out of my office!”

“How could you say that?! Don’t you feel the least bit sympathy?! People still liked the circus! I had the stands nearly full!”

“Too full if you ask me! SOMETHING had to get those poor kids outta there!”

“What… You…YOU did it!”

“Uh, excuse me?”

“You started the fire, didn’t you?!”

“Uh, as if!” Dullard smiled wryly. “Don’t start blaming me for YOUR messes.”

“RAAAAH! I’LL KILL YOU!”

“I knew it was you, John!” Larry shouted. “It was you ALL along!”

“I did you a favor, Larry! You refused to move toward the future.”

“That wasn’t the problem! You just didn’t like the circus. You’re a petty excuse for a grown man!”

“Yeah? Well, you’re no cousin of mine. You’re dead to me, Larry!”

“RAAAAAH!” And Grimley lunged at him in bloody fury.

Both adults engaged in a silly slap fight. They looked like a couple of deformed, oversized cats clashing their paws. “You smug, wide-faced traitor!” Grimley yelled.

“Big-nosed psycho clown!”

“We were family, John! We both have six toes!”

“Not anymore! I had mine removed, and donated to the children’s hospital!”

The operatives merely watched them with baffled, questioning expressions. “…You know, this opened my eyes a bit.” Mike said.

“Yeah. I hope we don’t end up like these guys.” Jenny replied.

“Yeah…” They stared in silence for a moment as their bout went nowhere. “Well, Dullard may have started it, but Grimley still made a deal with the Brotherhood, right? He still destroyed those other parks.”

“Yep. I guess they’re both kind of awful.”

“So, how about another team-up, Cous?”

“You bet.”

Jenny’s shoe KO’ed Larry and Mike’s fist downed Dullard.

The operatives proceeded to drag them back to the S.P.R.A.Y.S.H.I.P.. “Does that mean this place will go out of business?” Carmine asked.

“Frank’s the assistant manager here.” Mike replied. “He’s a cool guy, he’ll probably take it over.”

“Hey, can we check out my score before we leave?” Miko asked.

“Sure.” Jenny and Mike followed her to the scoreboard, in which cameras would record each person on the course and apply points based on their techniques. Miko currently had the top spot at, “35,000?!”

“WOO!” Miko cheered. “Is that scorebending or what?!”

“Heh, looks like we have a new rival, Mike!”

“Oh, boy…” Mike smiled with exasperation.

“Well, this was worth missing Suki’s friend’s party.” Miyuki commented as they exited the building. Above the exit was a large board, depicting Mr. Dullard saying, You are now leaving… THE FUTURE.

“Sorry, Miyuks. Have you met our new friend, Miko?” Drake asked.

“Hey, nice clocks!” Miko praised.

“Thanks. I predict you’ll be great friends with Sheila.”

“Oh, don’t give her the idea.” Eddy said.

Hinobi H.Q.

Screams rang from the depths of the headquarters. A black Mobian jackal with fiery white hair was strapped to a machine, sapping him of his chi. “Raaaaah! Nngh…” he grunted in a gruff voice. “Damn you, Kayaba… you’ll pay for this!”

“My friend, your chi was wasted with those petty mercenaries. A rare matterbender such as yourself should use your power for much greater things.” Spoke a thin and ordinary man hiding in the shadows.

“I’ll kill you! Aaaaagh!”

“Don’t squirm so much. It only hurts more. All I want is to create a perfect world. It may be painful now, but you’ll understand once it is over. Now, if you’ll excuse me… I have another subject to check on.” And so, he left the chamber.

“Aaaaaaaaaggghhh!”

Did you know that the first game I ever played was Mario Kart 64? Hehe, and they recently came out with a toy Mario Kart with a camera that you can drive around with a view from your Switch!

Part 5: Hinobi Kart Mini

James Woods Elementary; 9:00 a.m.

A black racecar with white streaks whooshed across the pavement of the school’s playground. It zoomed across a field-sized basketball court, expertly dodging the giant-sized kids playing their sport. It swerved and zoomed up a chalk-drawn racetrack, outrunning the giant racers, then it zoomed under a jump-roping girl just as she had leapt and the rope passed. It was then that a series of gigantic wheels carrying humongous shoes began to chase it. The gap was extremely tight as Jenny pursued the tiny car, making several tight turns. The car steadfastly sped faster toward the finish line, represented by Miko’s shoes. The car passed as Miko threw a punch to shove Jenny back.

“WOO! New record!” Quill declared, holding the remote control.

“Wow, nice driving!” Miko praised, picking the car up. “These tiny wheels got a lot of juice!”

“Jenny and Mike may have their sports, but remote car racing is a whole different ballpark!” Quill declared with confidence. “Sure, it can’t outrace the benders like Sheila or Wendy, but outpacing Jenny is good enough for me.”

“Yo, gang!” They looked over as a boy in a black sweater and a blue streak in his black hair approached. “I thought I saw a little car zooming around.”

A candy-haired girl with a cyan hoodie glitched up to Sector Q. “You ever been in a REAL racecar, Quill?” She glitched to sit on Drake’s shoulder. “I mean, remote cars are cool, but it doesn’t match the thrill of a real race!”

Miko gasped. “A GLITCH!” She whipped out her hammer and BASHED Vanellope across the playground. Miko ran after and tried to smash her, but Vanel glitched to evade. “Yo, what’s the big idea, did I say a bad word or something?!”

“What’re you doing to my sister?!” Dillon ran up as he and his shadow, Mario grabbed Miko.

“Your… sister?”

Drake came up and said, “We probably should’ve mentioned, but…” he explained Vanellope’s origins.

“Ohhhhhh.” Miko retracted the hammer. “Uh…sorry!”

“You’re that new girl, aren’t you?” Dillon asked. “Right, Maddy told us about you.”

Vanel sprung up and said in anger, “And I for one feel I should raise a protest for your unfair treatment of glitches!”

“Hey, we only fight evil glitches! That doesn’t mean all are bad. Like Ally here!” She materialized her ostrich companion. “She was a glitch that we turned good!”

Vanellope glared into the clueless eyes of the ostrich. “Ooo, I want you as my spirit animal, you little strawberry vanilla.” Vanellope huggled the bird half-aggressively.

“Well, I’m glad we got that straightened out.” Quill said. “Now, let’s get back to practice.”

“Practice? You entering a contest?” Dillon asked.

“Apparently, we’re gonna challenge one of the other sectors.” Miko replied. “Which sector was it again?”

“Sector GT.” Jenny answered. “About a week after they joined a few years ago, we volunteered to be the New Sector Welcome Party. That’s where we challenge new recruits and gauge their strength. Now we make it a yearly thing to test how strong they’ve gotten. One of their members, Uzu liked racecars, too, so he and Quill had a race. And Quill got SQUIIIISHED!”

“Yeah, but I’m not gonna let that oaf get the rubber on me again!” Quill stated. “I may be small, but I’ll be doing the squashing this time!”

“You still have a height complex?” Dillon chortled. “Dude, there’s a ton of people who’re tinier than you.”

“No, he and Uzu are actually pretty good friends.” Carmine replied. “Hehe, they love to geek out over how to make remote cars cooler!”

This sparked an idea in Miko. “Speaking of how to make them cooler, I wanted to show you something, Quill!”

“Yeah?”

“Well, when you said we were gonna play with racecars, I brought this!” She reached in her backpack to get a white racecar marked with Hinobi’s “H”, along with a VR helmet.

“Oh, dear. Another Hinobi gizmo?” Eddy asked.

“Don’t worry, it’s really cool! Here, sit on this bench over here and try it on.” Miko led Quill to the nearby bench. As Quill put the helmet on, she flipped a switch in the back and held the car up to her eyes.

Quill’s vision turned pixelly and he strangely found himself sitting in a car, in front of a wheel. “AAAAAH!” he screamed at the pair of looming Asian eyes beyond the windshield, eclipsing his whole vision.

“HAH HAH HA!” Miko burst out a loud laugh as the car shook in her hand. “I did the same thing to my family, it’s priceless every time!”

Quill panicked as he tried to get his bearings. He seemed to be buckled down to the seat as the car was suspended precariously in Miko’s hand. As her looming face moved away, the giant visages of his teammates, Dillon, and Vanellope surrounded him. “WHOA!” He especially freaked at Carmine, whose mask looked like a terrifying sea monster. “What the heck?! I shrunk?!”

“I think it’s a hologram.” Carmine replied, her muffled voice sounding a bit more nightmarish when magnified. “Your real body’s still on the bench.”

Miko carried Quill over to his gigantic real body, moving in conjunction with his miniature self’s confused movements. “…” Quill extended his finger forward, and seeing his own hulking finger approaching to poke himself sent an unusual nervous chill down his spine. “Man, this is so freaky! I tried to stay away from shrink rays as much as possible, but even a simulation just feels…EEESH!”

“I mean, it’s safer than actually shrinking, right?” Miko shrugged. “And it still feels real! That’s why videogames rule!”

“It’s basically a ripoff of Mario Kart Live.” Eddy said. “It did the same thing.”

“No, you didn’t get the live view like this.” Dillon corrected.

“Meh.”

“Yes, all your loud banter feels very real, how do I turn this off?” Quill demanded.

“Come on, Quill, you gotta try it at least once.” Miko pled, holding him close to her mopey face. “Heck, I’ll even shrink with you! Let’s have a race!” Miko set him on the ground and pulled out another helmet and car. She put the other car beside Quill’s and sat by him on the bench. As she placed the helmet on, “Zwoop!” a Mini Miko appeared in the car. “I’m ready when you are!”

Quill sighed at how persistent she was. At this level, he was totally dwarfed by his friends’ footwear, and he hated that they were all looking down on him like some neat toy. “Sigh, alright, we’ll try this once.”

“GO!” Miko stomped the gas pedal and whooshed off, swiftly swerving around the giant shoes of the operatives.

“Hey, that didn’t mean I was ready!” Quill hurriedly raced after, the giants scrambling to step aside. He could actually feel the momentum as he zoomed around the plain-sized playground. Quill would sometimes attach cameras to his remote cars to study the live perspective, but driving one this way felt somewhat amazing, but intimidating. He sped to catch up with Miko, the two driving circles around a tetherball court. He screamed as he hastily dodged the thundering sneakers of the titan kids. “Whoa! Heh, this is kind of exciting! You’re mine, Miko!”

“Heh heh!” Vanellope chortled at the benched kids’ motions. “It’s like they’re playing make-believe except they’re not~”

As they left the tether court, Quill caught up to the violet-haired racer, ramming each other’s car from the side. Miko drove away from him and began jigging her car side-to-side, causing her to zoom ahead of Quill. “Ha ha! When I spam quick-drifts, it enhances my engines to maximum speed! Gamer logic!”

“Yeah, well two can play at that-” Quill tried to jig his car the same way, “WAAAAH!” but he lost control and crashed into a misplaced lunchbox.

“OH, YEAH!” Miko punched to either side.

“OW!” Quill felt the impact as Miko’s real body punched his head. His helmet flew off with a spark as Quill seemed to fall unconscious.

“Ouch!” Jenny cringed. “Maybe they shoulda sat further apart.”

The Holo-Quill rubbed his head as his body flickered. “What did she…?” Quill looked over to his distant real body, noticing the helmet was knocked off. “Wait… shouldn’t I be…” He drove back to rejoin the others.

“Hey, I thought we were gonna drive through the basketball court!” Miko yelled, racing after him.

“Miko, what happens if your helmet gets knocked off while you’re still driving?!”

“I mean, you should be back in your real body. You’re supposed to be able to take it off, anyway.”

“Then why am I still in this?!”

“Uhhh…”

The racers returned to the bench as Miko removed her own helmet, finding herself back in her real body. She looked over Quill’s unconscious form with concern, waving a hand by his open, pale eyes. “Uh, Quill? Are you… alright?”

“What the heck is going on?!” yelled the tiny Quill in his car. “Did you kill me?!”

“N-No, I can feel you’re still alive.” Carmine replied.

Eddy picked up the fallen helmet. “I think Miko broke it. Should we… put it back on him?”

“Hey, Quill! Wake up!” Jenny tried slapping the boy and pinching him, but even the tiny Quill couldn’t feel the pain. “W…What’s happened to him?”

“I’m starting to think this is a glitch!” Miko panicked.

“This ain’t the kind of glitch I expected.” Dillon said. “I expected some kind of… sentient creature to come out or something?”

“What, I’m some kind of sentient creature to you?” Vanellope inquired.

“Um…yes?”

“Well, let’s take him to Phil.” Miko suggested, lifting Quill’s body. “He’ll know what to do. Come on!” Carmine picked up Quill’s car and carried him with.

Hinobi Stop

“Sooo… you were playing with the Hinobi Kart Mini,” Phil recapped, “and when you knocked his helmet off, he just got stuck in there?”

“Yes, that is a perfect summarization of what just happened!” Quill shouted. “Can you fix me or what?! Can’t one of you just shine your derez thingy on the helmet or something?”

“I think I know the problem here.” The manager said. “It’s a Switch Glitch.”

“A Switch Glitch?” Miko inquired.

“It happens with VR setups sometimes, where the player takes the helmet off, but they’re still stuck in the avatar’s body because it can’t tell that they logged out. As a side-effect, the real body goes numb like that. It’s actually a pretty rare occurrence, so tough luck to you, kid.”

“What is that supposed to mean, am I stuck like this?!”

“Relax, I’m sure they got an answer for this.” Phil typed on his desk computer. “Aha…it says we need a Memory Drive. Only problem is, we don’t have those in our shipments because we never got VR sets, yet. I guess they didn’t account for our little resident Kubota.”

Vanellope glitched onto the desk and asked, “What if we just stomp the car and break it, would he jolt back awake?”

“A GLITCH!” Phil tried to shoot her, but Vanellope began zipping around the store in evasion.

“NONONONO!” Miko jumped in the way. “She’s not a Hinobi glitch! She’s someone else, she’s friendly!”

“Yeah, we’ll see how friendly I am when I get serious!” Vanel declared.

“Uh…okay??” Phil lowered his guard with a quizzical expression. “But no, destroying the car’s a big no-no. It says there was an account of that happening and the guy was in a coma for a couple months.”

“How hasn’t this shady-ass company been sued, yet?” Eddy asked.

“Yeah, this is some pretty messed-up shit.” Dillon agreed.

“Look, I didn’t make the rules, kids. I’m just an ordinary store manager doin’ his duty. (Or so I think…)” he mumbled under his breath.

“Haha, you don’t think you did your doody?!” Vanellope warped on the desk and laughed.

“Get off that, kid!” Phil scared her off. “Anyway, if I send a call to corporate about this, they’re probably gonna send someone to fix the problem. And I don’t know how they’ll feel about… y’know, the ‘letting you keep memories’ business.”

“Ew, that’s gonna pose a problem.” Jenny said.

“Ooo, I know!” Miko perked up. “Try and get in contact with Five! See if you can get him to ask for a Memory Drive without saying the specifics! He can fly to Earth, and I can introduce him to my new friends!”

“That’s… gonna be pretty complicated.”

“Pleeeeaaaase, Phil?” Miko folded her hands with puppy-dog eyes.

Her response was a very long sigh of coffee-scented breath. “I’ll see what I can do, kid.”

“You’re the best, Phil!” Miko reached over the desk for a loving hug, her beaming smile in contrast with Phil’s gloomy frown.

“Right… now, protocol says we should keep the Switch Glitch victims in custody until help arrives, but I imagine you’d rather be with your pals.”

“Ditto.” Quill acknowledged.

“Alright, then you should probably go before anyone else sees. I’ll try to phone Five.”

The operatives exited the store as requested, crossing the parking lot leisurely. “I’m so sorry, Quill.” Miko said. “I never heard of this happening before, I didn’t know you’d be trapped in a tiny toy car. Are you mad?”

“Yeah, I am kind of livid, thanks.”

“Don’t worry, Quill.” Carmine said. “This sort of thing happens to every sector. But we promise to take good care of you!” She patted the car gently.

“I guess we’ll have to cancel our plans with Sector GT now.” Drake figured. “Since Hinobi values their ‘secrets.’”

“Pfft, I say you guys should go, anyway.” Dillon inferred. “Tell them what happened and everything.”

“Yeah!” Quill agreed. “No way I should miss our hangout over this!”

“It’s fine by me.” Eddy said. “Though I can’t imagine Quill should race in this condition.”

“Well, if you guys say so, the playdate is still on!” Drake decided. “Fine with you, Miko?”

“Sure! I’d love to see what other Earth sectors are like!”

“Do you two wanna come?” Jenny asked Dillon and Vanel.

“We think we’ll hang around here a little bit.” Dillon answered. “We kinda wanna… check the games out. But we hope things go all right with you, Quill.”

“Yeah, I’ll hang in there.”

“It does feel kind of awkward meeting Sector GT in this state.” Carmine said. “Are you sure you won’t be scared, Quill?”

“Come on, GT may be huge, but they ain’t scary.”

“What, are they like football players?” Miko asked. “Or are they like college students?”

“Oh, yeah!” Jenny laughed. “I guess we didn’t really mention that part.”

Guatemala

Sector Q flew all the way out to Central America, soaring over the partly-clouded skies of Quetzaltenango, a name that Miko wasn’t bound to remember any time soon. They closed in on the farming highlands, a lush and green collection of hills close to a forest. However, far from the village was the unmistakable shape of a KND treehouse, the colossal structure easily viewable from the town, designed to be this region’s symbol of hope.

However, as their Q-Ship drew closer, Miko realized something: Sector GT’s treehouse seemed a bit larger than Q’s, built with rather thick wood. “I heard their treehouse is built with wood imported from Amazonia.” Jenny mentioned. “It’s the best way to support those lugs.”

They landed inside an immensely large hangar, next to an oversized rocket-like ship. Miko was almost beginning to think that they all shrunk as well, crossing the vast hangar floor to a rather gaping doorway. “‘EEEYOOOOO!” Drake’s call echoed throughout the living room. There were six kids going about their own activities, and fitting with the décor, the GT operatives were the right scale to match it, some measuring up to at least 20 feet. “Where’s the welcome party?!”

“Hey, Sector Q is here!” Ally cheered, looking up from sweeping the floor.

“Ah, I thought it was about time!” Sind said, picking up his soccerball. The floor shook violently as the six giants jogged over. Quill almost paled as the towering titans approached at the speed that they did. Though he was used to being around the Giant Sector, their sizes were more than intimidating from this angle.

“WHOOOOOAAA!” Miko’s mouth had to grow to fully capture her surprise. “What do you guys EAT?! You’re really packing it!”

“This girl’s our new teammate, Miko!” Drake announced. “Miko, meet the Giants of Guatemala!”

The leader, Sind Diego was a blonde, Mexican boy with a red soccer jersey, black shorts, and red sneakers. The farmer, Doran Dodley was an orange-skinned boy with dim green hair, wearing bright orange shorts, shirt, and shoes. The housekeeper, Ally Mitchels had bowl-cut brown hair, a white dress with red polka-dots, and light-blue sandals. The smasher, Konbu Colins, the largest and huskiest giant, wore a green shirt and blue shorts, his black hair short on his pudgy head. His brother, Uzu had puffy brown hair, a yellow shirt with a waffle picture, blue jeans, and white shoes. Biyo Winston, despite his bulbous head, was the shortest giant at 14 feet, with a small bush of gray hair atop his scalp, a blue dress with black shorts, and white shoes. Shy and meek-looking, he served as the team’s doctor.

“You guys are WAY too huge!” Miko expressed, going directly up to the giants and craning her neck back. “I bet you’re like the strongest sector!”

“Not even close.” Ally smiled sheepishly. “Most of us are only around 100 with Power Levels.”

“How come this guy is wearing a dress?” Miko asked as she walked under Biyo. “Are you a boy or a girl?”

“I-I’m a boy!” Biyo flushed, backing up. “I just really like Numbuh 5, okay?”

“Numbuh High Five? You know him?!”

“No, Miko, he’s talking about Numbuh 5 from the previous gen.” Jenny corrected. “But yeah, Biyo is sort of a crossdresser.”

“And this guy is so orange!” Miko walked up and climbed around Doran. “Are you a carrot monster?”

“I had a serious addiction to carrots since I was little.” Doran replied with a blush. “When the Gigantification happened, my body turned this color as a result. Okay, my turn! Why is your hair like that?”

“No idea! I was just born with this color, even though no one in my family has it.”

“So, where’s Quill?” Uzu asked. “Did he not come today?”

“Actually, Quill got into a little accident.” Carmine walked up and held up the Hinobi car. “He’s right here.”

Uzu crouched down as his squinted eyes focused on the tiny car. “Oh…did Quill shrink?”

“He shrunk?” Sind asked worriedly. “Um…should we get him fixed at Moonbase?”

“It’s a little more complicated than that.” Drake answered.

“Yeah, Miko brought some cursed technology back from her alien planet.” Eddy explained.

“Cursed technology?!” Biyo screamed.

Sector Q briefly went over the incident that happened, though they left out the bigger details regarding Hinobi’s glitches and mind-wiping. “So, he’s gonna be stuck that way for a while?” Sind summarized. “Well, we wouldn’t have minded cancelling.”

“Maybe he should eat something?” Konbu suggested. “I’ll let him have one of my donuts!”

“Nice idea, but I don’t think holograms can eat.” Ally replied.

“Come on, we can still hang out!” Quill decided. “If I’m gonna be stuck in this car all day, no reason we can’t do it here!”

“Yeah, Sind!” Uzu agreed. “We’ll just have to be extra careful! That’s what we do best, right?”

“I guess so…” Sind rubbed his arm nervously.

“Great, then SHOW ME WHAT YOU GIANTS CAN DO!” Miko leapt and PUNCHED Biyo in the gut, the force blasting the mini giant across the room as a chair shattered!

“Oooooww!”

“We should probably head outside first.” Doran figured.

Hinobi Stop

Phil had sent an email to his old store, asking for a Memory Drive. Other customers were studying the shelves, such as a girl with braces and glasses, an African-American boy with a rocket hat, or a strange, black-clothed man with cowboy boots, who was checking out a parasite horror game. However, Phil’s eyes fell to Dillon, the boy’s eyes narrowed on the Chomp Kitty game in his hands. “You gonna buy something or what, kid?”

“Hey, I’m very selective with my games.” Dillon remarked.

“Is there another reason you’re still hanging around here?”

“Someone’s gotta make sure you’re doing your job.”

“Oh, I’m doing my job, are you doing yours?”

“Yep, saving the universe, one bad game at a time. So, which of these have the riskiest glitch potential?”

“Ex-nay on the itches-glay, kid.” Phil said as a firefly fluttered around him. “Ugh, would you go away?!” He tried to shoo the glowing bug away. “What’re you doing here in the daytime…”

Meanwhile, as BITT was patrolling around the back area, the robot noticed the security network seemed to be glitchy. The camera behind him flashed as Vanellope zipped out. “Boo!” And she glitched directly into BITT’s face. “Shhh-shhh-shhhhhhh!” Vanellope’s form was shown on BITT’s face, depicted as though she were behind him and putting a hand over his mouth. “It’s okay, buddy, I’m not a bad glitch. I just wanna hack around a bit.”

“Unauthorized personnel are not permitted on my hard-drive!”

“Yeah yeah, I’ll make it up to you later. Just lemme poke around just a little bit.”

The inside of BITT’s cyberspace resembled a sea of blocks resembling countless files. “Whoa…” Vanellope’s eyes fell wide before a rather huge and tightly secured file. There were large keys around the bottom of the file. “What’s inside this big thing?”

“This is Phil’s highly personal file, sealed with a code that not even he can crack!”

“Meh, I’ve cracked a few codes in my time. Let’s start with…” Vanellope pressed one of the buttons, resulting in a jovial Boooop sound. “Ha ha ha!” She pushed another, Bip! “Haha!” Then another, Boop. “Hmmm…”

Bip bip bibibibi boop, bip bip bibibibi boop, bibi boop boop, BOOP doo-doo-doo doo, boop! Vanellope began pressing them in a rhythm that resembled the chicken dance. She had quickly forgotten trying to decrypt the code just to enjoy herself. BITT seemed to be enjoying it, too, dancing and singing along with her.

…

Dillon’s shadow slithered behind the desk and whispered to Phil’s shadow. The adult’s shadow seemed to speak back, and afterwards, Mario returned to Dillon to pass on the info. Dillon cracked a smile and spoke smoothly. “But be straight with me, Phil. You ain’t a bad guy. If you were, you would’ve wiped our memories already, right?”

“My generosity has its limits, kid. If too many of you know about the glitch problems, we’ll all get in trouble with corporate.”

“Buddy, we faced a universe-destroying time god, I think we can handle a few sleazy game-developers. But if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you had something against them, too.”

“Well, it’s none of your business, anyway.” Phil replied as he again had to shoo away the firefly.

“No, it kind of is.” Dillon argued as the firefly flew over to the dark-clothed man, who proceeded to leave the store. “You Hinobi guys landed on our planet and are threatening us with your broken games. My friends wouldn’t appreciate another crisis so soon, so we’d like to stop one before it happens.”

Phil sighed. “Alright… I’m not gonna pretend to understand Hinobi’s policy or their programming. Most of the time, I don’t question it because I need my paycheck. But between you and me, I think they’re hiding something from me, and when I find out-”

Beeee doop, bee-deeee, doop, bee-dooooooo…

“What the-?” Hearing the strange, yet familiar singing, Phil turned to the back door. “BITT?” The manager rushed over and barged in to find his robot dancing in the air, his face glitching. “BITT, what’s wrong?!” Phil grabbed a gauntlet and flashed the Derez Light.

“YIPE!” Vanel immediately jumped out and glitched away.

“YOU!” Phil charged after her, and Dillon bolted out of the store alongside his sister. “YOU ROTTEN KIDS, you better not come back!” The other customers looked his direction with shock.

“You find anything, Vanel?!” Dillon asked.

“I tried, but we started playing chicken!”

“Ugh…” Phil huffed and returned to the back. “Great, what did they do to you, BITT?” He tapped the robot’s face to stop its jittering. “They better not’ve broken any…thing?”

An unfamiliar file labeled Bio Program Project appeared on the screen. “What in the… Where did this…”

“Congratulations, Ph—&*%*—il! You cracked the code!” BITT glitched.

“I…I did? YES! I knew I wasn’t clever enough to fool me! Hmmm…let’s store this somewhere else for now. I’ll have a look at it later.”

Sector GT

“HYAH!!” Jenny zoomed at Sind for another charged kick, unable to bend the giant soccer star’s leg. The soles of Sind’s shoes glowed a cyan color as his soccerball magnetically returned. Jenny dodged the boulder-sized ball, but Sind dealt a kick that blasted the soccer like a cannonball, flinging Jenny across the court. “Your kicks are nothing compared to Karin’s!” Sind declared.

Jenny switched rockets on the ankles of her shoes and shoved the ball back over with sheer momentum. The increased speed knocked Sind down with his own ball, then Jenny performed a high rocket-powered flip and stomped down on Sind’s back. “At least I get to save strength by not running!”

Doran led Drake out to his farmland, where giant produce was grown and harvested. Using his plantbending, Corn Missiles launched off their stems and homed in on Drake, the leader evading as they exploded. But Drake was tripped as Doran bent some roots up from beneath him. Doran dropped Cabbage Bombs beside him, Drake enduring the explosions as they coated him in juices. Drake pushed himself up and used his sword-hand to chop the crops down. He ran toward Doran and shot his harpoon to latch around his leg, and as he reeled himself toward the giant, he flipped and imbued Haki to his boots. The impact to his stomach sent Doran several yards, landing on his back. Doran bent up gun-like plants to shoot grape and pea bullets. Drake changed his hand to a retractable shield and ran to engage him again.

Konbu stood face-to-face with Miko Kubota, the gamer smirking with confidence even as the boy completely dwarfed her. To Miko’s surprise, Konbu curled his arms and legs up and seemed to retract his head into his body. The giant rolled at Miko and squished her like a 2D rug on the floor. Regardless, she reflated in good condition (gamer logic) and braced herself as Konbu rebounded. She pushed against the rounded mass, stopping Konbu in place. She struggled to push against the hefty boy, but was able to redirect him to her left. Konbu uncurled, and when Miko ran to him, Konbu bent down and dealt palm thrusts. Miko dealt thrusts of her own to negate his, then charged to shove him off his legs.

“Not bad!” Konbu praised. “You study Sumo Style?”

“I play sumo games!” Miko leapt to punch down against his face. Konbu coughed from the attack, then retracted his head to roll away once more.

“Yeah, but I can do it like Gorons do!” Konbu said as he emerged, squatting down. “I bet you’re not heavy enough for this!” And before Miko’s eyes, he lunged into the air, at least 12 meters! Miko wouldn’t have expected a giant of such girth and small legs to accomplish this, but she would definitely be more than flattened if she didn’t run out of the way. When Konbu crashed, the earth rumbled violently from his shockwave and knocked Miko off her feet. Konbu leapt once more and smashed the gamer beneath his belly.

“Hurrrrrah!” Miko extracted her purple hammer to force Konbu off and into the air. She expected another dramatic quake upon his landing and jumped at the same time, but she barely felt a vibration. “Hey, why didn’t you shockwave that time?”

“I wasn’t able to muster my chi in time.” Konbu replied, rolling at Miko again. She shoved against and tried to haul him aside once more. “I can concentrate my weight to specific areas and add more force!” With some added pressure to his belly, Konbu rolled over Miko. He then got up to jump and smash her again, belly bouncing against the girl to keep her down.

“HURK! Okay… uncle… can’t breathe!…”

“Hee hee hee!” Ally giggled, watching the battle with Carmine in her hands. “Come on, Miko, we’ve seen a ton of operatives lift Konbu up!”

“I guess videogames can only make you so strong.” Carmine shrugged.

“Hey, why aren’t you guys fighting?” Drake asked, trying to escape another of Doran’s vine traps.

“Why fight when we can play?” Ally asked, swaying Carmine in the air. “Life’s way more than just training!”

“You don’t want me to blow up your Broom Vacuum again, right?” Carmine asked.

“Well, that’s one reason.” Ally blushed.

Elsewhere, Uzu was driving an RC car, the size of a normal car, around a track and shooting targets with a turret. “Check it out!” he said to the little Quill on his shoulder. “I installed the boat function we talked about!” He drove the car into a moat as a raft inflated around it.

“Hah, I added that to mine, too!” Quill replied. “Too bad I won’t get to show you…”

“You can drive that thing around, right? We can still have a race.”

“I don’t wanna risk getting flattened. If this thing breaks, I could be out for months.”

“I guess you’re pretty confident I’d win, huh?”

“Yeah. I MEAN, NO, I NEVER SAID THAT!”

“Ha ha ha!”

“Yeah, ha ha, I don’t appreciate the mocking.”

“Okay, I’m sorry.” Uzu said with mild guilt. Feeling he should change the subject, Uzu asked, “So, how’s Miko like, anyway? She seems pretty fun.”

“Well, she certainly brought a ton of messes with her.” Quill replied. “Honestly… I’m not sure, anymore. I feel like our workload just increased tenfold with all this Hinobi business.”

“How come?”

“Let’s just say that Hinobi has a lot of problems, with this being an example. Because Miko works for Hinobi, she has to fix those problems, and that means we, her new teammates, have to help fix them. Though, I guess we would’ve had to either way, but still… I wonder if we wouldn’t have to deal with them if she hadn’t joined our sector. …Well, don’t tell her I said that.”

“No, I kind of understand.” Uzu replied. “Actually… I kind of relate to her. We all had a hard time adapting back to normal life because of our sizes. That’s sort of why we all moved to this town, because there’s plenty of land for us. Even the town started working to accommodate us… well, after we stomped a few villains, of course. But I guess Miko’s case is different, huh?”

“Yeah, it kind of is. I don’t even know if it’s her fault; even if they’re accidents or if she apologizes…”

“Hoo! That was quite a workout!” Miko cheered, flexing her arms as she and Konbu approached the two. “So, where’s the picnic you all were telling me about?”

“Hah, we’ll get it set right up!” Uzu smiled, standing up to full height.

Once all the pairs were finished with their bouts, Doran and Ally laid a large blanket down. The giants shared their favorite foods with the normal-size operatives, with Drake eating Doran’s carrot bread, Miko biting part of a large donut, while Carmine sipped part of Ally’s warm water through a straw. Biyo was holding Quill’s unmoving body in a basket with a pillow and blanket. “Biyo says that Quill’s vital signs seem okay.” Eddy explained.

“That’s good!” Miko smiled. “See, everything’s gonna be okay, Qui-”

“Yeah, I’m not gonna hold money on it though.” The car-bound boy cut her off.

“Um…but when you are, want me to get you anything? Mocha slushy?”

“I’m not really in the mood for anything.”

“Um…” Miko’s face fell with guilt. They both knew it was her fault and she was unsure what to say. “Do you want me to do anything?”

“Besides protecting my body or making sure Hinobi does their job, I’m really not sure.”

“I…I really am sorry.”

“I’m feeling a little uncomfortable about this.” Sind mentioned. “Maybe we should’ve just cancelled.”

“No, maybe I should just leave.” Miko stood and began to walk away. “I’ll go wait on the ship or something.”

“Come on, don’t leave, yet.” Jenny skated up and held her arm. “At least you’re trying… That matters.”

“I feel like it doesn’t matter enough.”

“Look, everybody makes mistakes they aren’t proud of.” Drake inputted. “Quill doesn’t have to forgive her, but we already agreed to keep this hangout going despite Quill’s condition. So, I think the whole team should be here.”

“Hmmm…” Miko awkwardly returned to her spot. “Well… I promise not to make you guys play any more Hinobi games. I’ll keep them to myself.”

“I don’t really think anyone should play Hinobi, anymore.” Eddy said.

“It doesn’t sound like their inventions are very safe.” Ally figured.

“Yeah, and you don’t know the worst parts.”

Miko let out a little whimper. She had always felt loyal to Hinobi growing up… and even after she learned about the glitches and mind-wiping, she still felt that they had everyone’s best interests at heart. Her old friends never felt like this… but if not for the mind-wiping, would everyone else feel like this?

“He…he’s moving!”

Hearing Biyo speak up, everyone looked to Quill’s body in his hands. Indeed, Quill seemed to be squirming to wake up. “Is he going back to his body?” Carmine asked hopefully.

“I don’t feel anything happening on my end.” The Quill in the car said. “Did Phil mention anything like this?”

“I don’t think so…” Miko replied.

“Nnn…YAH!!” Quill’s body jolted up, whipping out his Elementors as he blasted fire into Biyo’s face, the shortest giant screaming and keeling backwards as he tried to put it out. “AAAAAGH!” He set fire to the whole picnic, the operatives jumping away. “Ooo, it feels so good to be in the flesh! Now, where is that little…” His corrupted white eyes locked on the tiny car in Carmine’s hands. “THERE it is!” He quickly shot wind from the guns to blow Carmine over, dropping the car as it bounced away. The possessed Quill dashed for the car, but Ally jumped in the way, whipping out a broom and blowing a gust of wind from the brush. ‘Quill’ couldn’t withstand the wind and was blown back, then Drake jumped the boy in attempt to tie him up.

‘Quill’ switched to wind to blow him off, then shot ice to freeze Drake—Konbu leapt to flatten the possessed boy, followed by Sind jumping on his friend’s back to apply extra pressure. Konbu rolled off afterward, revealing ‘Quill’ to be battered and exhausted. Doran bent up some vines to tightly bind the boy, Carmine coming to confiscate his weapons.

With a stern expression, Miko marched up to the possessed boy. “You’re a glitch, aren’t you?”

“Not anymore! Now I’m finally free! Now, let me go!”

“Why did you try to hurt Quill?”

“So I couldn’t be sent back to that puny prison! I can’t even move around on my own unless someone pilots me! But even then, I have to act under their controls! You knocked a little sense in to me when you punched my helmet. It took some time, but I finally have a will of my own! Now, let me go!”

“Hell no!” Jenny yelled. “We ain’t gonna let you smash our friend!”

“I just don’t understand…” Miko spoke in a low tone.

“Understand what?” the glitch asked.

“Why do you glitches hurt people? Why do you hurt the people who enjoy your games? Do you all just feel like prisoners? Why?”

“I can’t really speak for other games, but I don’t like being trapped in a tiny car. Better this guy than me!”

“Give back my body, you jerk!” Quill yelled from Carmine’s hands.

“Alright… this needs to stop.” Miko turned and faced her friends with eyes of resolve. “I…I’m ashamed that my favorite company is doing this to you all. Hinobi… needs to answer for this.”

“Whoa…” Quill had never heard Miko sound this serious. It was subtle and reserved, but the little operative could feel the severity in his teammate’s voice. She actually sounded… pretty dependable.

Sind curved his eyes in a serious, agreeing fashion. “Yeah… You want us to help you guys?”

“We’d really appreciate it.” Eddy nodded. “But what’s even our first course of action?”

“Getting Biyo treated, for one.” Ally said, helping the burnt-faced boy to stand.

“It’s okay. I have something for this.” Biyo reached into his med-kit to retrieve some medicine.

“We still need to wait for that Memory Drive to help Quill.” Drake said. “Until then… I say we go bring this up with Cheren. Maddy might’ve already told him, but I say we get him to send word out to other sectors. We’ll be ready in case Hinobi tries something.”

“Yeah… that’s a good idea.” Miko nodded.

“Can I get one of those donuts?!” The Switch Glitch shouted.

Hinobi Stop; that twilight

“Sigh…” Phil couldn’t believe what he had just read. Why was Hinobi… trying to do something like that? Why would they want to? And more importantly…

He couldn’t finish his thought as a group of people walked into his store. It seems they’ve finally arrived. “Long time, no see, guys. Did you bring the Drive?”

“Right here, former boss.” Mitch smiled and twirled the cord in his hand. “So, where is the little newb?”

Part 6: I Wanted to Show my Friends

The Bio Program Project. By implanting Programs into mortal bodies, it will enable them to adapt to the real world without need of a computer source. With this means, perhaps we will be able to help the Core enter reality. However, implanting the Core in its entirety will destroy the host with its overwhelming chi. For that reason, only a small fraction of the Core’s chi was taken.

We’ve selected a candidate for the study, a married woman, but to avoid questions or interference, she will remain unaware of the truth. When she comes for a medical exam, we will implant the codes inside her in secret. She will undergo pregnancy and simply believe it to be hers and her husband’s doing. The “code” will be born as a human, but because their chi comes from the Core, there will likely be a surplus in Hinobi Glitches. In time, however, the Core may be able to enter reality, so long as the subject adapts. Until then, we will study them from afar.

“A Bio Program… designed to be born and raised as a human?” Phil mumbled to himself. “I’ve never seen the Hinobi Core… but what’s this talk about bringing it to reality? Why? Plus… who is this ‘subject,’ anyway? Would I… know them?”

He looked up when the door ringed. The store was otherwise clear of customers during this twilight hour… but Phil gasped, recognizing the woman entering. “Inspector Seven!”

“Please, Phil!” the pudgy woman chortled jovially. “Call me Barbara.”

“Heh, Barbara…” Phil smiled anxiously, expecting nothing shy of a bad outcome under these circumstances. “What brings you out to this little galaxy?” he asked, quickly and subtly closing the document he was looking at.

“Why, for a special inspection, of course. I’ve come as a personal escort to a very special guest. Oh, the coast is clear, sir! There are no other customers!”

“I’ve already sensed.” A thin man walked in. He had a white suit and coat, black pants, metallic eyes, and gray hair. “Still, you can’t be too careful. Not all things share their aura freely.”

“Puh…” Phil couldn’t help but gawk. “President… Kayaba. A-Are you… Sir…”

“Good evening, Mr. Altiere. I wanted to personally see how our shops were fairing on this… special little planet. There haven’t been any problems, have there?”

“Uh, no, no, no problems.” Phil glanced about nervously.

“But Phil, we’ve heard that a team of Hinobi agents were sent here with a Memory Drive.” Barbara said.

“Okay, there’s been a few glitches, but everything’s being taken care of. You have nothing to worry about!” He sported a grin, but deep down, he knew he was doing a bad job at hiding it.

“Yes, well… we’ll hear a full report from the agents, once they return.”

“Eh heh heh…oh boy.”

Sector Q

“Voom, voom…voom, voom…” Jenny was crouched down and rolling around the living room, Quill’s car in hand as she rolled it with her. “Uh-oh! The Sitting Nerd is blocking the highway!” She stopped the car at Edward’s blue shoes. “Once he’s on his computer, he’s unmovable!”

“I’m glad she didn’t put that helmet on me.” Eddy said. “That just looks so humiliating, Quill.”

“Just lift your feet.” Quill demanded. Eddy did so, allowing Jenny to keep vrooming.

Drake and Carmine were watching over the unconscious Quill’s real body, tied to a chair. “Now that we told Cheren to pass on the info… you think they’ll still help Quill?” Carmine asked.

“They shouldn’t really find out until after they fix Quill. But even then, I hope we didn’t just sign up for a war with Hinobi.”

“Me, too…”

“Guys!” They turned to Miko as she jogged in from the hangar. “I saw a Hinobi Truck coming! I think Five is here!”

“Is it just Five?” Drake inquired.

“I don’t know…” Miko’s face fell with the consideration. “But we’d better go greet them, anyway.”

A smallish truck designed with Hinobi’s tech and colors was flying into the hangar. Miko beamed, recognizing a familiar face behind the windshield. That same face seemed to shine upon seeing her. “FIVE!”

“Miko!” Her old friend jumped out of the truck and ran to embrace her in a hug.

“I knew you would bring the Memory Drive! It wasn’t too hard, was it?”

“Uh, actually…”

“Oh, Miko, Miko, Miko.” None other than Mitch Williams marched out of the truck. “Not even a week and you’re crying to us for help.”

“M…Mitch?” Miko released the hug.

“Yeah, I couldn’t really get the Memory Drive without getting the team involved.” Five admitted.

“Hey, Miko!” called a Muslim girl with a hijab and Hinobi armor. “Are these your new teammates?”

“Are these guys gamers, too?” asked a husky, African-American boy. “I wonder how they rank?”

“Have they checked out any of our games?” asked a thin boy with red, curly hair. They were all wearing Hinobi armor.

“Wow, I didn’t expect the whole gang to be here!” Miko smiled. “Guys, this is Sector Q! Drake, Quill, Eddy, Carmine, and Jenny. Sector Q, that’s High Five, Bergy,” the curly-haired boy, “Zahra,” the Muslim girl, “Haneesh,” the African boy, “and…”

“That’s right! Mitch Williams, the one and only~” The blonde, dark-skinned boy boasted. “Aren’t you newbs lucky to be alive today?”

“Uh, we’re not newbs.” Drake inferred. “We’ve been around for years. Been on lots of missions, suffered some wounds.”

“Yes, well experience speaks louder than words,” Mitch passively surveyed the team, “and I—GOOD GAME GRUMPS, what is that?!” he panicked at seeing Carmine. “You better not have a disease!”

“No, I lost my skin in an accident. I have to wear this or else everything really hurts. Anyway, could you please fix our friend?” She gestured to Quill’s car in Jenny’s hands.

Mitch cocked a brow at the tiny boy in the car, then at the same boy tied to a chair. “Hah. I knew I was right not to trust that thing. Mini karts are for newbs.”

“I could beat you at racecars any day!” Quill shouted.

“Aww, and he tawks, too!” Mitch cooed. “How cute~”

Drake marched up to envelop Mitch’s vision. “You gonna fix him or not?”

“Fine, fine.” Mitch withdrew a cord. “All we have to do is insert this end in the car,” he tapped the square end, “and this end in the real body’s ear.” He tapped the plug end.

“This is gonna feel weird.” Quill said.

“Well, I doubt you want to stay mini, so let’s get this over with.” Mitch plugged one end into the car and the other into Quill’s ear. Energy began transferring through the car as Quill’s holo-body began disappearing. The body was shaking as other energy transferred into the car as well.

“Nnnnnn…yah!” Quill’s eyes shot open.

“Quill? Are you back?” Carmine asked.

“I…I think I am!”

“Wait, it could still be the glitch!” Jenny accused. “We gotta test it! Quill, when the Big Mom Pirates invaded Cleveland 3 years ago, which officer did you fight?”

“His name was Cracker. He had the power to conjure these biscuit soldiers. I actually worked with Kodama to beat him!”

“Okay, but which crewmen did WE fight?”

“I don’t remember their names! I think Drake fought a firebending dude with long sleeves, Eddy fought some pumpkin-headed dude, Carmine fought a ladybug girl that was mocking her appearance, and Jenny… you fought some guy that looked like Elvis Presley?”

“Yeah, he sorta did!” Jenny laughed.

“Glad to have you back, buddy!” Drake untied him.

“No payment necessary, just praise is fine.” Mitch boasted. “Now comes this part.” And he readied to flash the memory-wipe-

The friends looked away as Miko jumped to block him, her eyes strict. The ERROR message flashed on Mitch’s gauntlet. “Mitch, we need to talk.”

“What are you doing, Miko? You know that other operatives can’t-”

“Well, here’s a news flash for you, buddy.” Drake stepped up. “You’re on Earth turf now. We play a different kind of game, and it’s called, ‘No Memory-Wiping.’“

“What the… Miko, you haven’t been wiping them?!”

“Mitch, the mind-wiping needs to stop. These glitches are hurting Hinobi’s customers and they need to know.”

“That’s not for you to decide, Miko! Do you know how much trouble you could be in?”

“Ain’t you the one that transferred Miko?” Drake inquired. “You wanted to get rid of her, so she shouldn’t have to play by your rules, anymore.”

“The reason I did so in the first place was because she was trouble. You can’t tell me you haven’t had any problems with her.”

“Not as many as we’re having with you, newbie.”

“Uck! Newbie?! Well, get this through your thick skull.” Mitch jabbed the slightly shorter boy in the chest. “I’m an elite gamer that’s battled with the greatest! I traded bullets with Sinon, the FPS Master. I traded fists with the Gamer Queen, Gaz Membrane. Even two of the Pirate Emperors, Kroctus and Mandy, were no match for me in Mario Kart! Because I,” jab, “am MITCH,” jab, “WILLIAMS-”

BAM! Drake’s fist flew like a cannon, smashing Mitch’s face into a crater. The boy flew back, headfirst against the truck as his teammates looked on in worry. “My NOOOOOOOSE!” He sprung up and screamed in a high pitch. “You broke my noooose! You bully!”

“Miko ain’t a problem. Hinobi’s the problem. And we’re not having it, anymore.” Drake vowed. “It was their choice to set up business on this world, but if we have to clean up their messes, we ain’t letting people forget them.”

“Yeah.” Miko said. “People can’t enjoy Hinobi games without knowing about the glitches. If Hinobi wants a good relationship with its customers, they should let their customers know and decide for themselves. Don’t you think, Five?”

“Um…it’s not that I don’t agree, but… I was kinda hoping to visit, not start a rebellion.” Five chuckled nervously. “Mitch, why don’t we just let them go and-”

“No!” Mitch raised his gauntlet. “Teammates, arrest Miko and wipe their memories!”

“A-Arrest?” Zahra asked.

“You know mind-wiping doesn’t work on her. We have to arrest and report her!”

“Er…” Zahra and the others hesitantly raised their gloves, except for Five. The Q operatives assumed battle poses, with Miko folding her arms in confidence. Five could only look between both groups in fear.

The floor seemed to bounce and quake under some heavy footsteps. “HEY, guys!” Sind Diego stomped into the hangar, followed by his teammates. “We heard some yelling! You guys aren’t fighting, are you?” the leader asked, smirking down at Mitch’s group.

“Hu-hu-hu-hu-hu-hu…” Mitch nearly wet his pants before the giants, the six stopping directly behind Sector Q and staring down the Hinobi agents with total intimidation. “W-W-What are… these behemoths?!”

“Aw, yeah!” Miko cheered. “You didn’t expect me to be friends with the strongest sector in the KND, did ya?! These giants were bred and raised in a lab, designed to squash all resistance!”

“We don’t like to talk about the ‘lab’ part…” Sind said.

“Yeah, that’s right! It’s scary stuff! You don’t mess with Sector GT, or they’ll go, DHOMP, DHOMP, DHOMP, DHOMP!” Miko stomped her feet and hunched over like a monster.

“Sector GT?” Bergy asked. “Like… Glitch Techs?”

“Glitch Techs?” Uzu asked.

“Oh, that’s their other name.” Miko replied. “Wait… Sector GT, Glitch Techs… hah, that’s kinda funny!”

“Wait, I know that guy!” Konbu pointed. “It’s Mitch Williams!”

“WAAAAH!” Mitch cried as the giant bent down and snatched him off the floor.

“I watch your Let’s Play videos! You’re so cool!” Konbu said as he swung him about like a doll.

“LET GO! Let go of me, you oversized newb!” Mitch shook desperately until Konbu finally released him. “What the-?! I’m covered in donut goop! Disgusting!”

“We’ve made our point, Mitch.” Miko said. “We appreciate you helping Quill… so, you can go now.”

“Grr!” Mitch grit his teeth, staring Miko in the eyes. “…Hmph.” With that, the leader returned to the truck. “Guys, let’s go. This treehouse is too retro for my tastes.”

The others shared concerned glances and boarded the truck. Five first turned to Miko. “Miko, I…I think what you’re doing is cool, but… I don’t think I could join you. You know my dad went to prison for hacking one of their games, right? I would just make more trouble for him if I…”

“I guess…” Miko rubbed her arm nervously. “Well, do you think you could still visit later?” She cracked a weak smile. “When Mitch isn’t around? I promise they don’t break everyone’s noses.”

“I’d like to, but…”

“Hurry up, Five!” Mitch honked the horn.

“Uh…I’ll see you later, Meeks.” Five regrettably boarded the truck, his friend bowing her head somberly. The 12 operatives watched as the truck took off from the hangar, flying into the fading twilight.

Miko looked over as little Quill held her left hand. “If the moment hasn’t passed… I’ll take that slushy now.”

Miko giggled. “I’ll be sure to get it in the morning.”

“Do you want us to stick around in case they come back?” Ally asked.

“You can head home if you want.” Drake answered. “Even if they do, we’ll be fine.”

“Yeah, we do take up a lot of room here.” Doran figured.

“Hey, Ally, before you go, I just remembered something!” Miko said as she materialized her ostrich. “This is my pet, Ally! You have the same name!”

“Oh, wow! Haha, that’s amazing!” Ally beamed, reaching down to pat the bird with her finger. “Hey there, Ally!”

“Hehe!” Sind giggled. “Let’s hang out again later! Hopefully, things will be better by then.”

After a few minutes, the giants reboarded their ship and left the treehouse as well, leaving far more breathing room for the Q’s. “I think I’m gonna sleep in my house tonight.” Miko said. “Check in with my family…”

“Yeah, they’re probably worried about you.” Drake replied. “Heh…I didn’t make a bad first impression, did I?”

“Well, Mitch likes fighting games as much as any other.” Miko shrugged. “If anything, you were flattering him!”

“I get the greeting next time!” Jenny cheered, raising a foot in a swinging position.

“Hehe, it’s a promise!” Miko laughed. “Well… see you tomorrow, guys.”

“Later, newbie~” Eddy winked.

Close to Hinobi Stop

“Ugh, that stupid Drake Bell wannabe!” Mitch grumbled, dabbing his nose with a washcloth. “I was going to start a stream tomorrow morning!”

“Hey, Mitch… what do you think about the memory-wiping thing?” Five asked.

“I don’t really care about it. But Hinobi sponsors my videos, so I’m not about to stop for Miko’s sake.”

“I’m just a little worried about her. Because of her immunity, what if Hinobi tries to do something to her? Or her friends?”

“Whatever they do, it won’t be our problem.”

“Come on, you care about Miko deep down.”

“Let’s report to Phil that the mission was a success. And since I’m not looking to get in trouble, we’ll feign ignorance about the memory thing.”

“I guess so…” Bergy said worriedly.

They parked the van in the parking lot and crossed to enter Hinobi. “Phil,” Mitch began, “we’ve successfully fixed the… they, yey, YAH?!” But he lost his train of thought immediately, the operatives gawking at the surprising guest in the store.

“Hello, Sector Hinobi.” Kayaba greeted. “Everything’s been fixed, has it?”

“President Kayaba! Ih, Ih, it’s such an honor!” Mitch smiled and panted ecstatically. “I-I didn’t have a chance to put on makeup, I…”

“The living legend!” Haneesh said. “What are you doing here, Sir?”

“A personal inspection.” Kayaba answered. “My… that’s quite a bruise you have.” He acknowledged Mitch. “What happened?”

“Oh, uh…I tripped and hit my nose.”

“You’re also covered in what smells like donut glaze.”

“I stopped by the donut store… where I tripped. Heh, it’s not like I was punched by a brute and then grabbed by a giant kid or something!”

“Oh, Mitch.” Zahra sighed.

Kayaba raised a Hinobi Gauntlet and aimed it at Mitch’s. It displayed a hologram of Miko and the other operatives. “What the… Miko, you haven’t been wiping them?!”

“Mitch, the mind-wiping needs to stop. These glitches are hurting Hinobi’s customers and they need to know.”

“That’s not for you to decide, Miko! Do you know how much trouble you could be in?”

“Ain’t you the one that transferred Miko? You wanted to get rid of her, so she shouldn’t have to play by your rules, anymore.”

“Um, not that I don’t like my job,” Bergy spoke meekly, “but that’s kind of an invasion of privacy.”

“Miko is not doing her job?” Kayaba inquired. “That’s problematic…” He fast-forwarded through the rest of the scene. “And you five didn’t detain her?”

“We couldn’t just do that.” Five said. “Miko is our friend. And, now that she’s been transferred, she’s technically outside our jurisdiction.”

“Hmm…then perhaps letting her be transferred was a mistake. We’ve heard she could be quite a troublemaker. I guess it’s much trickier to manage her in this environment, Phil.”

“I mean, she’s with her team most of the time, and they’re not Hinobi.” Phil shrugged.

“And did you know about this, Phil?”

“Ummmm, I…”

“Hmm…I think a meeting is in order.”

“A meeting?”

“Yes. I would like to speak with Miss Kubota.”

“B-But why?” Five asked worriedly.

“To determine if sending her here was the right decision. Phil, would you call her?”

“It’s getting kinda late, she’s probably eating dinner-”

“Come now, Phil, we haven’t got all night.” Barbara said.

“Sigh…okay.”

“Ah, and Mitch… let me fix that for you.” Kayaba aimed his glove at Mitch. The boy’s head turned digitally as his nose seemed to blink back to normal.

“Whoa…thank you, Sir!”

“It won’t last for long, but it should make breathing more comfortable for now.”

Kubota Household

Miko joined her family in time for dinner. She sat across from her youngest sister, Lexi, still wearing her karate robe. The youngest brother, Lee was secretly giving his brussel sprouts to their large dog, Cloud, and their cat, Aerith. Cloud seemed to like them, but Aerith smacked them away.

Miko looked under the table as Lexi seemed to flick a paper ball over. Miko used her feet to unravel the ball and read the note: How’s the glitch business going? Miko began scribbling on her own paper under the table. She balled it up and flicked it over, Lexi unfolding it. Kinda complicated.

“Girls, no passing notes under the table.” Hugh said.

“So, are you enjoying your new friends, Miko?” Mayumi asked.

“Yeah! They’ve been pretty cool. We went to this skatepark, and we beat up some evil carnies, then it turned out the skatepark owner was evil, then we met a team of GIANTS, and…”

“Okay, slow down, kiddo.” Hugh laughed. “Heh, Earth is certainly exciting. I heard there was an incident where a bunch of buildings and landmasses suddenly appeared in the sky? And it was right before we came here!”

“For being such a peaceful galaxy, a lot of dangerous things seem to happen here.” Mayumi said. “I’m a little worried for you, Miko.”

“I’ll do fine, Mom! I’ve been a big help to them so far.” Naturally, her parents didn’t know anything about the Hinobi problems. They had always scolded her for being too obsessed with her games over school work, but if the truth about the glitches became public, it would certainly create some tension with her family. She didn’t want to dump the truth out now.

“Still, ever since you’ve been in KND, it’s been harder to schedule classes for you.” Hugh mentioned. “I know that schools agreed to exempt operatives from class during missions, but we’d like you to have some form of education.”

“But the KND teaches me a ton! Like… Lincolnville has a big jungle place because… the environment is well taken care of, compared to other, non-jungly places! Oh, and Guatemala’s farmlands are so great that people grow to be giants! And, through use of physics, people can cartwheel on a thin rail on roller-blades, and… not fall?”

“Honestly, Dad,” began Nica, the eldest sister, “I heard that most people forget 90% of the things they learned in school after graduating. Miko’s probably learning way more than the rest of us, and busting villains as a bonus.”

“I guess, given her academic difficulties, it’s the best we could ask for.” Mayumi said.

“You mean that she’s stupid?” Lee asked.

“You’re grounded, Lee.” Hugh said.

Miko glared at her brother, falling silent as she ate her dinner. “Uh, hey, Miko!” Lexi spoke up, wanting to change the subject. “Have you met Maddy Murphy? Some of the playground kids talk about her.”

“Yeah, I met her. Why?”

“I heard she’s the toughest girl in town! I gotta challenge her to a match!”

“Heh, good luck with that. She uses Haki, which… I think makes her pretty strong.”

It was then Miko felt her phone ringing. She pulled it out. “It’s… from my boss.”

“Oh, dear.” Mayumi frowned in worry. “Well, you better answer it.”

Miko answered, “Hello, Phil?”

“Hi, Miko. Sorry if we’re interrupting something, but… we need you at the store for something important.”

Miko clenched her teeth anxiously. “Uh…can I finish dinner first?”

“Yeah, sure. Just get here when you can.”

“‘kay…” She hung up. “They… need me for something.”

“Hm hm, you sound pretty dependable.” Mayumi smiled.

“Yeah, I know…” Miko forced a smile. “I hope I can get back soon…”

After finishing her dinner, Miko put her shoes on and walked outside. She gazed up toward the Sector Q treehouse, shadowed by the night. “…” She was about to summon Ally to make the ride to Hinobi Stop, but faced toward the treehouse again. She pulled out her phone and called, “Hey, guys? It’s Miko.”

“Hey, Miko. You need something?” Drake responded.

“I just got a call from Phil asking me to come to the store. He said that-”

“Alright, we’re on our way!”

“No, you guys don’t have to come. I was just letting you know-”

“Yeah yeah, we all know this is something suspicious.” Quill interrupted. “Just hang tight and we’ll back you up.”

“It’s just another standard operative tradition!” Carmine cheered. “It’s standard protocol, Miko!”

“Haha…thanks, guys.” Miko hung up. “Alright… let’s go.”

Hinobi H.Q.

The Mobian prisoner was locked in a cell after his use was exhausted for the day. He had no strength to muster to try and break free or even stand.

The jackal cracked open his mismatched eyes when alarms began blaring. He was curious what was happening, but was ascertained that it didn’t concern him. …But a few minutes later, the door to his chamber was burst open. An impish, shadowed figure stepped in, peering at the prisoner with red eyes.

Hinobi Stop

Miko stood a short distance away from the parking lot. The occasional car would pass by, but Miko eventually heard the familiar rumbling of Jenny’s rollers. “Hey, Jen! Decided to let the others eat your dust?”

“Nah, I’m just carrying them in my Convenience Box.” Jenny reached in her pocket and withdrew the Infi-Cube. The other four teammates jumped out of it.

The kids peeked around the corner to the lot. There were a couple cars parked, particularly the Hinobi Truck. “Want me to sneak in and scout the area?” Eddy asked.

“I can sense a lot of people inside.” Carmine said.

“Let’s just go in.” Miko decided. “We shouldn’t have to worry.”

The six friends calmly crossed the parking lot and entered the store. “Hello? Phil?” The store was creepily dark, but even creepier was the soft whirring sound heard behind them. When they turned, it seemed the entrance had disappeared. “Well, nerds.” Miko cursed simply.

“Thank you for coming, Miss Kubota. I see you haven’t come alone.”

A gray-haired man in a labcoat walked out of the darkness, his expression glum. “Well, hello, obvious villain.” Jenny greeted. “Wanted to get straight to the butt-whooping, huh?”

“No way… President Kayaba?!”

“You know him?”

“He’s the president of Hinobi!”

“Well, that’s a twist.” Eddy remarked. “Usually, the bosses of shady organizations stick to the shadows instead of inviting us directly to their lair.”

“Your friends have already filled me in. It seems you haven’t been cooperating with our policy, Miss Kubota.”

“I…” Miko half-expected that a Hinobi officer would show up and trouble them, but she hadn’t expected the actual president to appear. She took a breath and explained the truth. “When we encountered our first glitch, I tried to wipe their memories, but I ended up blinding Eddy. They got mad and told me not to use that on them.”

“And why did you hesitate? Was it that hard to catch them off guard?”

“That isn’t the point! I couldn’t have just kept lying to my own teammates. And every time I tried to show them one of your games, it just kept backfiring. They were angry, and I realized… if not for the mind-wiping, then a lot of customers would feel this way.”

“It is exactly for that reason we must make them forget. Miko, you’ve always been one of our best customers. We have online copies of every receipt for every customer, and yours are quite abundant. Our games that you cherish, that you grew up with, would not exist if these glitches became too public.”

“Yeah, but…but that’s why I’m so disappointed! Hinobi was my best friend growing up! It was my life! And then I met Five, I started making friends thanks to Hinobi. I wanted to show my new friends all your games and make them see why I love them, but your glitches hurt them.”

“Then purge their memories and reignite their experience.”

“No! Hinobi shouldn’t do this to its customers!”

“You know, Nintendo’s glitches don’t try to kill people the same way yours do.” Eddy inferred. “And I’d wager their technology is just as advanced, if not better. Why don’t you try changing your software so we stop having this problem?”

“You fool! It is this software that will put us above the likes of Nintendo, Sony, or any other developer!” Kayaba waved his gloved hand as a mini volcano, snowy mountain, and a clown appeared. “This energy that we use, that I discovered, we call it Miracle Matter. Making Programs feel real, giving them life, and augmenting reality will help our customers feel one with our games. Every glitch that you derez makes our games become more perfect. Every memory you wipe rekindles the friendship between our creations and customers.”

“That’s not the right way to rekindle friendship.” Quill stated. “I know people have flaws that they don’t want others to be aware of, but the more time you spend with people, the more likely they are to find out. By then, they’ll either accept you or reject you, but even if you try to forget, the same thing will eventually happen again.”

“Yeah.” Drake said. “But you know something? It’s hard to believe you guys were able to cover this up so much that it didn’t go public. What are the odds you cracked a deal with some higher-up politicians, or even the media?”

“Some friendships require tradeoffs to overlook flaws.”

“Well, you’re not trading off with us. Even if you wipe our memories now, it’s already too late. By now, the whole KND knows your secret.”

“Sigh…I knew Earth would be a troublesome place to establish business. But Miko… your immunity to memory erasure is an unprecedented issue. At this rate, I can’t just fire you. I may have to take you into custody. I will separate you from your friends and make them forget you ever existed. But if you wipe their memories now and come back to me… we can work together to fix this whole problem. So…?”

“…” Miko narrowed her eyes and wagged her finger. “Come at me.”

“So be it. Glitch Techs… arrest them all.” Kayaba sank into a hole as five figures marched out. They were Mitch, Five, Haneesh, Zahra, and Bergy.

“G…Guys?” Miko spoke with hurt in her voice.

“This is what happens when you don’t follow protocol, Miko!” Mitch stated, a hint of static in his voice. “Now, to reiterate, teammates, attack!”

The agents ran to confront the operatives, with Mitch tossing holo-shurikens at Drake, Zahra charging at Carmine with a pink laser sword, Haneesh running at Quill with energy scissors, and Bergy shooting lasers at Eddy. Five flew above with jet boots as he shot lasers at Miko, his friend dodging. “Five, why are you doing this?! Are you…?” As Miko tried to look him in the eyes, she noticed that his irises had big white H’s. She looked and noticed the same H’s in the other’s eyes.

Jenny lunged up to KICK Five in the gut, slamming him to the wall. “I’ll fight him so you don’t have to!”

“Guys, look at their eyes!” Miko said. “I’m not sure if these are the real ones.”

“Alright, then we won’t hold back!” Drake decided, shooting his harpoon at Mitch.

“AAAH!” the gamer cried with a hasty dodge. “How dare you accuse me of non-realism! I’m the one and only Mitch Williams!”

“In that case, I’m going for the boss!” Miko decided, extracting her hammer. She leapt and slammed it against the spot that Kayaba sank into, bashing it multiple times as the floor cracked. Finally, a hole was broken open, so Miko bravely dove in.

“We’ll catch up with ya!” Jenny called. She gracefully maneuvered around the floor to evade Five’s aerial shots. Five would elevate if Jenny tried to jump-kick him, so the girl rolled to the wall and tapped on her shoe rockets. She could boost up the wall, then kick off to land a kick to Five’s jaw. He flew further from the wall and shot homing missiles at her, but Jenny could easily jump up the projectiles for the next attack—Five switched on a shield to block and bounce her off. He then burned a laser along the floor, chasing a fleeing Jenny, and she was quick to whip around when he changed its position in front of her.

“You’ll never reach me up here!” Five taunted.

“Unless I use this!” Jenny grabbed a metal object from the Infi-Cube and threw it down. It grew into a rail and propped itself up like a slope, and she quickly skated up to an unprepared Five as she dealt a kick to the crotch. He lost control on his jetshoes and crashed on the floor, leaving Jenny to deal the finishing kick.

Miko landed in another empty room and spotted Kayaba. “YAAAH!” She unhesitantly leapt to smash her hammer—he effortlessly stepped left. Miko violently tried to swing it side-to-side, but Kayaba’s position changed so quickly, it was like his legs weren’t even moving.

“What are you trying to do, child? Attacking your boss is rude.”

“Uh, you make videogames, dude! The only way to beat the level is to beat the boss! Now, hold still and take it!”

Quill was using his shortness to duck under Haneesh’s scissors, the latter tanking Quill’s fire blasts. Quill pressed both the wind and fire functions to muster an enhanced blast to banish him away. Haneesh recovered and launched mini scissors at Quill, but even as the boy pursued, Haneesh backed away in evasion. Quill dropped an RC car and steered it toward Haneesh, who was unable to escape from the tiny speedy toy. He tried to step on it, but the car withstood his weight and tripped Haneesh. Quill dashed forward and performed a flip onto Haneesh’s chest, freezing ice over Haneesh’s face. Haneesh smacked Quill off and got up, using a heating function of his glove to melt the ice. Quill combined Fire and Ice to spray water around the floor, then he blew wind to wash a wave over Haneesh. With that, he quickly swapped back to ice to freeze the water and freeze Haneesh like an iceberg.

Miko leapt to punch Kayaba, the president lazily bringing up an arm to withstand the punch. Miko was knocked back by an invisible force, but she landed on her feet and returned to deal a rapid flurry! “You are strong, but it’s not nearly enough. I thought, by now, you would’ve learned some form of Haki, but it seems your brain is unfit for the task.”

“What, you’re calling me stupid?! Then why can’t you mind-wipe me?!”

Carmine ran from Zahra and threw bombs behind her, the Muslim easily evading them. When Zahra slashed at Carmine directly, the latter evaded with Haki and sneakily dropped M.A.R.B.L.E.s. The tiny bombs exploded around Zahra while Carmine escaped their radius. Zahra recovered, so Carmine threw more grenades. Zahra changed her sword to a bat to hit the bombs back, but still Carmine avoided. “AAAH!” Unfortunately, Zahra landed a bash to the head as Carmine was knocked over, her gas mask slipping off.

“Looks like that armor doesn’t protect you after all!” Zahra declared.

Carmine faced up at Zahra, revealing her grotesque, pinkish and shriveled head. “Oh, my…” Zahra hesitated.

“Yeah… this is what I look like. Ow, and that really hurt!” Carmine began squirming. “The air is making the wound sizzle! Ow! Ahh!”

“H-Hang on, let me get your-”

Carmine flicked a M.A.R.B.L.E. at Zahra’s face and exploded it, the Glitch Tech keeling over. “But thanks for the offer.” Carmine smiled, going to reclaim her headwear.

Eddy was tapping his laptop to shoot lasers at Bergy, who shot lasers in turn, both skinny teammates suffering an equal amount of hits. However, Eddy had secretly dropped a robot bug and lured Bergy’s vision away from it. He inputted commands for the bug on his laptop, at the same time coding lasers. The robot skittered up Bergy’s leg and along the underside of the arm. Once the bug reached the gauntlet, it sank its “teeth” into the glove to input a computer virus. “Huh?! What’s going on?!” Bergy panicked as his controls began fizzing out.

“Here’s a bullying classic!” Eddy declared, thrusting punches at himself. Bergy’s glove began to punch himself against his will. “Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself, stop it!”

Downstairs, Miko began panting with exhaustion, at a loss for ideas as she could neither damage nor touch Kayaba. “But haven’t you just met these five? Weren’t you moved here against your decision? Why risk so much for them?”

“I…I don’t know!” Miko panted. “They were just… mad at me, for the mind-wiping thing, and the car thing… and it was all your games’ fault! You and your stupid rules! You know, me, Five, and the others still love your games. We still play them, even at the risk of glitches. So, why can’t other people…”

“You are trained to battle the glitches, but most people are not. Only true gamers can accept the glitches and learn to conquer them, in the steady process of achieving perfection. But these new friends clearly do not understand. They are closed-minded to games and turn them away for the smallest flaws. And they will not understand you.”

“Pfft, guess again, smarty! They let me stay, even after I hurt Eddy, and they wouldn’t let me come here alone. You’re the only problem here, you and your janky games! If your games aren’t perfect enough, then you, shouldn’t, SELL THEM!” Miko began furiously bashing her hammer against the unmovable developer, but the weapon merely fizzled out each time it was at Kayaba.

Drake shot his harpoon at the wall behind Mitch, hauled himself over as he tried to kick the LPer, and repeat the process repeatedly. Mitch formed a barrier to make Drake crash, then he disabled it and trapped the Q Leader inside his own bubble prison. “Try breaking my nose from in there, Captain Hoo-”

Drake imbued Haki to his harpoon and pierced the bubble, stabbing Mitch in the gut. Drake pulled Mitch to him to land a solid nose punch, shot him forward, then retracted for another punch, followed by a third one before letting Mitch go down for good. “They don’t call me the 3-Hole Puncher for nothin’!”

“Drake, let’s hurry and help Miko!” Carmine ushered.

“Aye-aye!” The five quickly jumped into the hole. They were just in time to see Miko failing to hit Kayaba with the hammer, the gamer reaching her limit once more as she slumped in exhaustion.

“You can’t take all of us!” Jenny rolled up for a kick that Kayaba evaded, Carmine threw some bombs that he survived, and Quill ran circles around, shooting flames over the president.

“It doesn’t seem like all of us are taking him…” Eddy commented.

“You cannot defeat me in my augmented reality. Why bother wasting your efforts for Miko? You’re better off losing your memories and letting her go. She will only bring you more trou-”

“Can it with that bullcrap, buddy.” Drake stated, marching up to Kayaba with his harpoon trained on the neck. “If Miko never came to our sector, we might’ve never known about your shady operation. She’s already been a big help. Maybe we just met her, but we’re not gonna let you take her. I know my girls, buddy, and this one’s got a big heart.”

“I’ll admit, I’m not entirely used to her,” Quill said, “but I’d feel pretty small for letting some creep take her.”

Miko blushed lightly. She was used to Five sticking up for her, but it felt far more flattering that her new friends were doing the same.

“Sigh…all I wanted was for people to love my creations.” Kayaba said. “But it seems they’re just not ready, yet.”

“Yeah, well what’re you gonna do about it?” Eddy asked.

“More testing is required… nay, a new approach.”

“Just spill the beans, Gray Hair.” Jenny retorted.

“I’m saying that I admit defeat.”

“You…you are?” Carmine asked.

“Even if I try to drag Miko away now… I’ll only be denying the truth. My games… just aren’t perfect, yet. They were not ready for Earth’s homes.”

“It’s not about being perfect.” Eddy argued. “It’s about not letting your games come to life and hurt people! Just go the old-fashioned way! As long as games stay in the console, who cares if they glitch?!”

“That is where our ideals part, I’m afraid. But it doesn’t matter now. My approach is wrong, either way. Forgive me for my disturbance, Kids Next Door. I will leave… and shut my stores down.”

With a wave of his glove, the room derezzed into pixels and changed back into Hinobi Stop, games and consoles neatly stocked on the shelves. And Kayaba had disappeared.

“Geez, what happened?” Phil stepped out from the back room, rubbing his head. “I feel like I went into Doki Doki shutdown.”

“Hey, the store’s back to normal!” Haneesh said as he and the others stepped out. “Where’s President Kayaba?”

“Miko!” Five exclaimed, running up to hug his friend.

“F-Five!” Miko perked up in confusion. “So, just now, those were really… fakes?”

“What are you talking about?”

“We were attacked by Kayaba, and… I guess he’s gone now.”

“My nose!” Mitch screamed, holding his squished face. “It’s broken again! Mr. Kayaba?!”

“Well, Phil, everything checks out.” They turned as Barbara exited the back area. “Congratulations on your well-kept store!”

“Uh…thanks?”

“Unfortunately, in light of some recent controversy, we may have to close business on Earth for a while. However, we’ll put in a good word for you at GameStop, so no worries.”

“Geez, I just can’t catch a break around here.”

“So… what happens to me?” Miko asked.

“Well, my dear, you may have to find another part-time job yourself. Unless you would rather move back to Coruscant. Our main branch will be happy to have you back.”

Miko looked to Sector Q. “Hmm…I think I’m good where I am. I’m starting to like it on Earth. Besides… someone has to stay and make sure you don’t try anything.”

“That’s all well and good then. Make sure you get to bed soon, children!” With that, Barbara left the store.

“I guess… everything’s fine, then?” Five asked, confused by the rather sudden resolution.

“I guess. …I’m sorry I dragged you into this, Five.”

“No worries! No matter how far apart we are, I’ll always have your back!” Five punched her shoulder playfully.

“Haha! And no matter how far the Wi-Fi stretches, I’ll always break your virtual back!” She punched his back.

“Ugh, this is so cheesy, I’m becoming lactose!” Mitch complained. “Let’s get on the truck and leave already.”

“Aw, can’t we stay for a little bit?” Haneesh asked, approaching Quill. “I’m digging this kid’s blasters! What are those buttons?”

“Nature Crystals from Schnee Dust!” Quill twirled his Elementors. “GKND nicked these for me!”

“Wicked!”

“Hey, sorry about what Mitch said to you.” Zahra said to Carmine. “It must be hard to have to wear that.”

“It is, and I wish I didn’t have to. But you know, there’s probably lots of people with worse conditions, so… I like to hope I’m sort of an inspiration.”

“Eddy, do you have an online screen name?” Bergy asked.

“On Nintendo, I’m Eddy-Will-Floor-You. ’Cause I’m Eddy William Flores in real life.”

“I’m Bergmaster97! Heh, there were 96 others when I decided that one.”

“Sorry that I broke your nose, Mitch!” Drake apologized. “I’ll pay for your plastic surgery if you want.”

“Not necessary. I have a highly skilled editor, so you’ll be paying him in my stead.”

“Screw off.”

“But you just said-!”

“Y’know, maybe more people will respect you for tanking an injury. Just look at me.” Drake held up his hook. “When I was in training, Arctic Base got attacked by a sword Nighlok. I got kinda ballsy with him and lost my hand. But now a bunch of girls think I’m cool.”

“Yeah, but I sound like a nasally freak thanks to you!”

“Chicks did nasals.”

“What the…ugh, why am I bothering with you? I’m Mitch Williams! Good day, sir!” And he began to march out.

“We’ll catch you later, Meeks.” Five said. “Maybe during a holiday or something.”

“It’s a deal, baby seal!”

“Haha, that’s right!”

Both teams left the store and went their separate ways. Why is Kayaba just letting her go, anyway? Mitch thought suspiciously. Miko was always unusual… and ever since she joined, Barbara’s visits have been more frequent, even here. I wonder…

Barbara was already returning to Coruscant on her own ship, Kayaba seated behind her. “So, this was a successful test?”

“Yes.” Kayaba affirmed. “Perhaps working with Earth’s KND will give Miko far more experience. I was worried since her mental capabilities were reported to be more than faulty. She should be capable in excelling in any physical activity, but anything that requires focusing her chi may be lost on her. But perhaps mental growth is not the most important aspect of a person. Perhaps I have overlooked the heart. Perhaps, through experience and friendship together, her heart will grow stronger. And that may yield the same results.”

“And you believe the Earth KND possesses that ‘heart’?”

“If Sector Q’s words and actions are anything to go by. For now, we must continue with our own end of the project. We may be able to finish Aincrad by next-”

An alarm rang through their ship. Barbara answered. “Is there a problem, Franklin?”

“Inspector Seven! Is President Kayaba there? There’s been an emergency! The matterbender was kidnapped! He’s gone!”

“What?!” Kayaba gasped. “By who?”

Unknown base

The jackal was rested on a chair in a dark room. An obese, egg-shaped figure stepped out to greet him. “Well, what cruel operations has Hinobi been running?”

“Who are you?”

“I am Dr. Eggman, the universe’s greatest scientist. My special sources have informed me of the ‘glitches’ running rampant in Coruscant, and it reminded me of something I’m looking for. I tried to implant this virus into their network and investigate them.” He held up a blue Flashdrive in his fingers, and it had an eye symbol. “But their defenses are quite strong. However, I was able to locate you, so I phoned in an old friend to retrieve you.”

“And why be so generous?”

“Because I want to know what Hinobi is hiding. Why were they keeping you prisoner?”

“They were trying to drain me of my Matter Chi. They…oogh!” His body began fizzing like static.

“What’s wrong?”

“My body! It feels… unstable! They…they took too much! Please… do something!”

“Hold on, I should have some remedies for this.” Eggman pressed a speaker button. “Scratch! Grounder! Get down here with some Matter Stabilizers, now!”

“Yes, Your Maliciousness!” Scratch responded in a scrawky voice.

“I think I used one to clean the toilet yesterday!” Grounder followed.

“What do you want from Hinobi?” the jackal asked.

“Something that could potentially benefit you in your current condition. Perhaps the two of us could work together.”

“If you can fix this… I’ll do anything you ask…”

“And does our new friend have a name?” Eggman smiled.

“My name… is-”

Kubota Household

Miko dressed in her pajamas as she tucked herself in bed. She wore a minty-yellow sweater and dark-green pants going into socks with pink stripes, and her hair was wrapped in a bun. Lexi was already asleep in the bed across from hers. “So, Miko, what did they call you for?” her mother asked.

“Uh, they wanted me to help fix some computer… thingies?”

“Really? You?”

“Pfft, well, yeah! All ya have to do is just… okay, they just needed someone to help load trucks.” Miko replaced her bad lie with a better lie. “There’s been some problems, so… Hinobi might be closing their Earth stores for a while.”

“Oh…that’s unfortunate.”

“Yeah, but later I’ll try to apply for GameStop! That’s just as cool!”

“Hm hm, does it have to be a game store, Miko?”

“Well, games are what I know best.” Miko mumbled and shrugged sheepishly. “But, anyway… I’m glad we moved. My new friends have taught me a lot, and they’re so understanding.”

“That’s great, dear. I’m glad that you’re… playing a game right now, aren’t you?”

Mayumi had faintly heard a beep under Miko’s blanket, so she revealed the DS in her hands. “It’s Mario! I’m taking a break from Hinobi.”

“Hm hm! Just don’t stay up too late. Good night, Miko.”

“G’night, Mom!” Miko waved as Mayumi exited the room. With that, the gamer grabbed a headset and got under the covers. “So, you geared up, Eddy?”

“Ready when you are!” In his own room, Eddy was under the blanket with his own DS.

The sound of Mario Karts whirring could be faintly heard from the dim-lit bedrooms. They were committed to crushing each other on the track. “Uh, Eddy? Is that supposed to happen?” Miko found herself stuck inside a mushroom graphic and unable to escape.

“Hah! So, Nintendo never patched that glitch after all! I’m glad some things are still the same.”

“Haha, and it’s not trying to kill us either! …Seriously, how do I get out?”

“When I cross the Finish Line, You_K.O.!”

“Nnnnooooooo!”

Lexi grumbled in frustration at her sister’s noise and tried to bury her head under her pillow. (Play the “Credits Song” from Glitch Techs!)

A Newbie’s Quest : Cast:

Monica Ray as Miko Kubota

Dan Green as Drake Puncture

Dee Bradley Baker as Quill Ramsey

Ben Diskin as Eddy Flores

Phyllis Smith as E. Carmine

AJ Michalka as Jenny Strongarm

“Mr. Baxter, we’re back from Earth.” Five greeted as the operatives approached their new boss.

“Did ya bring me the Clam Necklace souvenir like I asked for?” Mr. Baxter was a gray alien in a brown wig and Hinobi uniform.

“Well, no, we ran into some problems.”

“Yeesh, what happened to your nose, Mitch?”

“I was punched by a brute! I demand worker’s compensation!”

“The only compensation you’ll get is a binky and a rattle if you don’t stop whinin’! Now, lean over here.”

Mitch did so, and Roger planted a kiss on Mitch’s broken nose. “How does that feel, Mitch?”

“It feels… better.”

Roger smiled and stroked Mitch’s face. “You really should get that lip mole removed, I notice some shaving cuts on it.”

Greg Cipes as Dillon York

Lauren Tom as Vanellope von Schweetz

Ricardo Hurtado as High Five

Luke Youngblood as Mitch Williams

Haley Tju as Lexi Kubota

Scott Kreamer as Phil Altiere

“Alright, time to check if all these games are where they should be.” Phil said as he began his new job in GameStop. “What the…” All the cases appeared to be filled with doughnuts. “…” Well, he couldn’t very well let these gunk up the cases, so Phil delightfully began eating. “Oh…I’ve missed you, my sweets.”

Somewhere far away, all the real game discs were hunting foxes for robots.

Michael Dobson as Larry Grimley

Brian Drummond as Hamshank

Colin Murdock as John Dullard

“Come on, tell me this doesn’t sound like a Deadpool impression!” Sind Diego boasted. “Ahem…yo, who wants to go out for chimichangas? That’s Mr. Pool, first name Dead!”

Sectors Q and GT laughed and clapped. “Wow, that’s almost like Ryan Reynolds!” Quill said.

“Man, who the hell is this giant kid tryin’ to imitate me?” Sind mimicked.

“Ha ha, good one!” Miko laughed. “But, who is Deadpool, anyway?”

“An R-rated movie we weren’t supposed to watch.” Biyo whimpered.

“Come on, Biyo, it wasn’t that bad.” Konbu replied.

“I threw up 50 times! Oooo, and now I want to again…”

Ryan Reynolds as Sind Diego

Madeleine Morris as Doran Dodley

Amanda Gish as Konbu Colins

Terri Doty as Uzu Colins

Kristen McGuire as Ally Mitchels

Kate Oxley as Biyo Winston

Sharon Mann as Cheren Uno

On a jovial stroll down the street, Miko walked by Nolan York and his wife, Danika. “Hey, man! Lookin’ dandy!” Miko did a wink and flicked her fingers at them. “Yo, I like your hair, woman! I need to get me a strip!” The couple giggled at her demeanor.

Marc Diraison as Kayaba

Betsy Sodaro as Barbara

Mike Pollock as Eggman

Liam O’Brien as the jackal prisoner

Glitch Techs characters owned by Eric Robles and Dan Milano

Other characters owned by their respective owners

Published by FanFiction

Presented by Gamewizard2008

Sector Q will return for more!

“Last week, Coruscanti game developer, Hinobi had established shops in the United States as they localized their games to our fair planet. However, due to sudden reports of extremely faulty hardware, in which game characters physically came to life and attacked their players, all of their products were pulled off the shelves and recalled from buyers, ultimately postponing their operations until this issue is resolved. Officers from KND and G.U.N. are looking to ensure no major harm was done to the buyers.”

“Well, Eva, I think it’s safe to say who won’t be winning Game of the Year!”

“Perhaps not, Kade…”

Cheren smiled, seeing that the news broadcast seemed to go without a hitch. “Everything seems to be okay on this end.”

“Yeah, but it doesn’t seem like Intergalactic News broadcasted anything on Coruscant or anywhere else.” Nebula replied through the terminal. “I contacted Sasha about it and she’s working to inform all her KND. It’s probably gonna cause some problems for the Hinobi operatives.”

“As long as it stops people from being hurt by those glitches, it’s a necessary cost. On the bright side, it sounds like things are working out for Miko in Sector Q. Things are really shaping up for us this year!”

“Well, since we lived through the biggest crisis that could happen, hopefully things will be smooth sailing until at least next year.”

“Yeah, but we still need to keep our eyes open. After those last couple incidents, I think our new struggles have only begun. Luckily, we should have more than enough new operatives to help us.”

This was a nice little side-story! But yeah, Sector Q will naturally have a big story in the future, but that’ll be after the additions to Pirate Wars, along with another project. Besides Miko, I had fun giving Sector Q their long-awaited screen time. They were probably the last OCs I made for Nextgen, and it felt nice to write out a new batch of good and simple, but unique OCs! Fun fact, the First Gen Sector Q were initially Depthcharge2030’s OCs (including the famous Nolan York), and I think that whole side-plot was based off some foreshadowing in the original KND show that Sector Q were somewhat famous in the KND. Kind of a shame that I didn’t give them justice earlier, but the long wait is over! So, what did you think about the Quahog kids? We’ll have plenty more time for them later, so until then! Keep gamin’!

…

“I’m on my way to the meeting, Gaz.” Tallest Zim said to his wife. “You sure you don’t want to come?”

“I’m in the middle of a tournament, Zim!” The purple-haired woman was seated on the floor, locked in a space-shooter game. “I’m not going to some boring council meeting!”

“Ahh, some things never change.” Zim smiled. “Well, you have fun, dearie.”

Her fingers not deviating from the buttons, Gaz glanced down to an envelope in her purple-striped lap. Its seal resembled a pirate skull with blonde, horn-shaped hair. “…I’ll think about it.” Gaz said as she shot down 10 more ships.

Chapter Text

Hyrule Castle Town

“BIG NEEEEEEWS!” cried Big Bird, recording the exciting ceremony that was transpiring. “For nearly 4,000 years, the Kingdom of Hyrule has been without its true ruler! Princess Zelda and the royal family remained on Earth while her people have migrated to a new planet. Although a stand-in family have managed the kingdom, they have left the throne unoccupied, forever awaiting their princess’s return. At long last, that time is now… but just LOOK WHO IT IS!!”

This should have been a wonderful moment for the Hyruleans, for every single race and the rulers of every region were in attendance. Yet, the once-happy citizens sulked in fear of the demons that overfilled their town. A squat minister approached the queen at the top of the towering altar, gently placing the crown over her horn-shaped blonde hair. “Um… a-all hail the new Queen of Hyrule, the descendant of Princess Zelda.” And she stood as all citizens were forced to meet her terrifying glare. “Mandy McKenzie! May she lead our world to ever-lasting glory!”

Underground Dock

A boat followed a river from the sea and sailed onto the castle moat. It sailed into a tunnel leading under the castle grounds, where it would park at an underground dock.

A black-haired man with green-lensed glasses and black clothes with a red scarf stood at the dock. He watched as a purple-haired woman stepped off the boat, wearing a black dress with gray sleeves and a skull on the chest, and black- and purple-striped stockings. The front of her hair and bangs almost resembled the fangs of a beast.

“You must be Queen Gaz.” The man spoke in a droll tone, his teeth green. “My name is Nergal. I’ve been asked to show you to your quarters.”

“Uck, I can smell the demon poo already.” Gaz retorted. “It better not smell like this when I get up there!”

“Rest assured, we have already cleaned. We’ve also made sure there was plenty of space for your games. Mandy was strict in seeing you were comfortable.”

“Then this is going to be a pleasant vacation.”

“Indeed. Jeff, start carrying Gaz’s luggage!” Nergal ordered to a large spider on the ceiling.

“You got it, Boss!” Jeff replied cheerily. “Oops, I mean, aye-aye, Captain! Gotta stay with the pirate theme, right?”

Nergal escorted Gaz up the stairs, entering a corridor to the castle. “Though I wouldn’t think the newly-conquered abode of the Nightmare Queen is the ideal hotel.”

“What, Mandy invited me to her crew and I figured I’d give it a shot. Being the queen of Planet Wisp isn’t as exciting as I would’ve hoped. I mean, it was pretty cool at first, but it gets so redundant. I’m excited to try out these new drones Mandy promised me.”

“Knowing your political reputation, it would be wise to keep your identity secret when going out. I recommend wearing this.” Nergal presented a white-faced mask with purple hair and blank, black eyes.

Gaz put the mask on. Oddly enough, it went well with her own hair and meshed well with her face. “Hmm…I like it.”

“Hey, Brooooo!” Gaz removed the mask as a blonde woman with curly pigtails swayed down the hall and slumped her arms over Nergal’s shoulders. She wore a short white dress with a red bow around the waist and exposed cleavage. “Is this the new girl? Ooo, nice and goth, I bet you’ll get along~”

“I’m not actually a goth.” Gaz corrected. “I just like the colors. Who’re you?”

“This is my little sister, Catherine.” Nergal answered. “She’s a succubus.”

“Succubus? So, you two are demons?”

“Uh-huh!” Catherine released Nergal and brought out two bottles of rum. “Our father is one of the Underworld Demon Lords, Nergal, Sr.! And get this, we’re also the cousins of Mandy’s husband, so that almost makes us related!”

“Catherine’s also a game developer at Fowles Electronics.” Nergal Jr. mentioned. “You might not’ve heard of them.”

“I know a couple of their games, actually.” Gaz replied. “Like that creepy peeping tom game…”

“Hehe, that was me!” Catherine winked and made a “V” gesture! “Are you into that stuff, Gaz~?”

“Don’t be crazy. So, where is Mandy, anyway?”

“She’s going to be busy today.” Nergal said. “But she’d like to make time for you tonight.”

“I want all my consoles hooked up by the hour, or all your rations are mine for a week!”

“As you command, my ‘Tallest.’”

“Hee hee.” Gaz snickered. In truth, Nergal kind of looked like her brother, Dib, so she might enjoy bossing him around.

Hebra Mountain

Mandy’s takeover had become famous amongst all the KNDs, with the Coruscanti being no strangers to it. A fleet of ships amassed outside Hyrule in attempt to shoot through the Anti-Fairy swarm. In the midst of combat, a cloaked ship had managed to sneak through a clearing of fairies. It descended to the planet and through a sea of clouds, the air becoming frosty as they were nearing Hebra Mountain.

Hebra took up the northwest portion of Hyrule’s Main Land, a land that only the bravest explorers would venture. The ship landed within a crevice as five operatives stepped out. They were the agents of Sector Hinobi, Mitch Williams, High Five, Zahra, Bergy, and Haneesh (from Glitch Techs). “Oh, man…I can’t believe we just landed on a Pirate Emperor’s planet!” Bergy said cowardly. “This is way outside our jurisdiction!”

“Yeah, well blame Five!” Mitch argued. “It was his idea to volunteer us for this crazy mission.”

“You agreed to it, too, Mitch.” Five reminded. “Besides, our reputation’s been a bit bad ever since glitch info became more public. We can’t just limit ourselves to fixing Hinobi’s problems.”

“All I’m saying is the fans better love me for this.” Mitch said as he cloaked the parked ship. “Let’s find a way off this mountain.” The team of five began their venture down the snowy path.

“I just wish we could’ve landed somewhere more convenient.” Zahra said. “Like, I know landing here makes us less conspicuous, but how’re we supposed to escort prisoners all the way up here?!”

“For now, we just need to investigate. Eventually, more operatives will make land on the planet and things should be easier.”

“Do you think we could go to Gerudo Town first? I heard it’s one of the nicest places!”

“It is if you’re a girl.” Five inferred.

“Hey, what’s that?” Haneesh pointed. A faint streak of light seemed to graze across the clouds. They could make out a shape around the light’s source, and it seemed to be, “It’s… coming toward us!”

“Ohhhhh NERDS!” Mitch screamed, the kids ducking as a large mech, resembling a white knight, whooshed above and brushed away the snow. The mech turned vertical and landed firmly, turning to face the intruders.

“So, that’s why most of the invading fleet was above this mountain. Thought you could sneak onto the planet, huh?”

“They discovered us already?!” Mitch exclaimed.

“You barely even started the level, but it’s already Game Over! So, let’s get this over with!” The knight slashed its blade and released a strip of energy, the operatives jumping backward.

“Go for the knees!” Mitch shot the knees as his teammates followed orders. Despite its hefty build, the knight performed tricky dodging maneuvers and leapt for a chop attack, the five breaking apart. The knight dealt a spin attack against Mitch, who brought up a shield in defense, but was still knocked away. Five used jetshoes to fly above and attempt to bash the robot’s head with a Digi-Hammer. The pilot noticed glitches in their controls and reacted to swat five away.

“So, your gadgets are designed to mess with programming. But I’ll bet it has a harder time with foreign machinery.” When Haneesh tried to chop its legs with scissors, the knight jumped and thrusted a kick to kick the larger boy away. Bergy had latched onto its back and climbed to the head, shooting a Derez Beam. The knight performed a backflip, side flip, then spin to shake Bergy off. Zahra dealt a slash to the knee with her laser sword, but the knight twirled and kicked her backward, followed by a spin and chop-down at Mitch, who dodged.

“Hey, Mitch, you think we should try to retreat?” Five asked.

“You can try, but no matter where you go, nothing will stop me from raining terror and fear unlike you have ever seen!”

“Terror and fear?” That line was almost familiar to Mitch. And now that he thought about it, this mech’s techniques were sort of familiar to him. Its techniques, along with that line reminded him of… “Gamer Queen Gaz?!”

In a house somewhere on the mountains, Gaz was controlling the knight with a Sheikah Slate, which displayed a first-person view like a handheld game. “Hold on… he said your name was Mitch. Did he mean Mitch Williams?”

“Queen Gaz?! What in blazes are YOU doing here?! I knew you were rivals with Mandy, but you’re actually in her crew?!”

“I just wanted a little excitement in my life. And I’m actually having fun! Especially now that you’re here, cocky little Mitch!”

“This thing is the actual Gamer Queen?!” Haneesh exclaimed. “That’s impossible!”

“Heh. I guess there’s only one way out of this.” Mitch smirked. “Gang… follow my lead!”

Near Rito Village

After fleeing the Hebra Mountains, Sector Hinobi were able to seek refuge at Rito Stable. Having changed into Hyrulean uniforms to blend with the environment, they viewed up at the cleared sky with a sense of ease and comfort. “I guess whatever was happening is over now.” Five deduced.

“It doesn’t make things any better for us.” Zahra said. “You think Mitch is okay?”

“I hope.” Bergy replied. “I still can’t believe he did that…”

“You’re going to be a diversion?!” Haneesh whisper-shouted, the teammates hiding behind a boulder.

“There’s no way we can take on a pro like Gaz. The best we can do is try to get away from her. She won’t care for newbs like you, but she can’t resist chasing me.”

“But we can’t leave you to fend her off on your own!” Five argued.

“If we try to escape together, she’ll never let us leave her sight. We’ll just have to part ways for now. Just relax, I’m Mitch Williams! I’m ready for whatever she’s—GAAAAH!” Their boulder was shattered by the knight’s sword.

“That’s a coward’s way to fight, kids!”

“Yeah, well is that the best you can do, you second-rate gamer?!” Mitch taunted as he began to surf about the snow on a digital shield.

“You wanna say that to my face, pretty boy?” Gaz controlled the mech in attempt to chase him.

“Old ladies shouldn’t play videogames! I know babies that can pilot better than that!”

“You’re asking for it now, Mitch! I’m taking you down once and for all!”

The others watched as the robot chased Mitch without a care for his teammates. “She really is easy to provoke.” Five noted.

“Don’t worry, guys, he’s Mitch Williams!” Haneesh assured. “He’s probably getting all grumpy trying to find us right now.”

“Even if he is… was it a good idea to come here?” Zahra wondered. “I feel like… we just walked into something big. I’m not sure if I can handle it.”

Five held her hand in comfort. “We’ll be fine.” He said with an assuring smile. “By now, all the KNDs will know about this. And that means Miko will find out we’ve gone missing. When she gets here, the pirates won’t know what hit them!”

“Hm hm!” Zahra was almost envious with how much faith he was placing in Miko. Still, charging recklessly into Emperor territory is just the kind of thing Miko would do, and it was even somewhat worrying. “I just hope she’s careful!”

KND Moonbase Audience Chamber

There was an unsettling air amongst the operatives gathered in the auditorium. They noticed that several sectors were absent and they knew why. They were almost hoping that Cheren was going to make his sudden return, only to be disappointed. Jerome had just showed them the video of the meeting, and the fact Cheren was missing only filled them with more dread.

“So, you lot can vote on that poll on your own time.” Jerome said. “As was discussed, your Supreme Leader is still M.I.A., and until he is found, we have assigned a temporary replacement. May I introduce, King Evan Pettiwhisker Tildrum of Avalar.”

A golden-haired boy with cat ears, a tail, and king’s attire stepped up, greeting the operatives with a smile. Beside him was his partner, the Forest Pirate Tani. “Hello! It’s very wonderful to meet you all. You may not know me, but I was a captive of the Sky God Pirates until two of your operatives were kind enough to rescue me. The least I can do is help lead you in these dark times. I’ve been given brief descriptions about some of you, so based on that, I would like to help develop a plan-”

“BOOOOOOO!” Evan was punished with all manner of trash, unwanted food, weapons, and bending alike.

“Who the hell is this twerp?!” Ruby of Sector KB shouted. “Give us back Cheren!”

“We don’t want no foreigners runnin’ our business!” Chimney screamed.

“Bring Cheren back to us!” Drake Puncture of Sector Q demanded.

“Give us Mother 3!” Eddy Flores yelled.

“ENOOOUUUGH!” Tani cried, aiming her bow. “The next person who speaks is getting an arrow to the face!”

“J-Just, calm down.” Evan stuttered. “Look, I…I know I could never replace your leader, and I never intended to… but after hearing how much you’ve been going through following his absence, I felt obligated to help you. What you need is a strong leadership to get you back on your feet.”

“A ‘strong leadership’?” Evan gasped when he felt a gun to his head: Ciel Phantomhive of Sector $ had snuck behind him. “You? I don’t think even Cheren would let himself be defeated so easily.”

Evan closed his eyes and took a breath. “But shouldn’t you pull the trigger before claiming your victory?”

“Don’t mind if I do.” Ciel shot the gun.

Time seemed to slow down for Evan as he bent back to dodge the bullet. Afterwards, he swiped the gun from Ciel’s hand, smirking at the earl. “His Observation Haki is impressive.” came the voice of Sebastian Michaelis. Evan frowned when the butler began to scratch his cat ears. “And I sense a remarkable air about him. I say he will make a fine leader.”

“You only say that because he’s a bloody CAT!”

“Well, if I may weigh in,” said Bon Clay Jr., Sector KB leader, “I don’t care how good you can tango, I ain’t lettin’ any pussycat replace mah Cherry Boy.”

“Seconded.” Melody Jackson folded her arms, scowling. “It’s one thing to replace teammates, but I won’t replace family members.”

“Ahem, Melody?” Mason spoke up awkwardly. “About that, I need to talk to you after this.”

“We only want Cheren!” Grenda (Sector GF) thundered. “No CATS! No CATS! No CATS!” She started pounding the seat in front of her.

“Okay, everyone needs to calm down!” ordered Mikoto Misaka, Sector AC leader. “Look, I’m fairly new to this organization, so maybe I don’t have the sentimental feelings you all have, but we should at least give this guy a chance.”

“I’m not gonna listen to a thing this guy says.” Lars of Sector BC stated. “Cheren was the perfect mix of friendly and aggressive, that’s what made him so special. This guy doesn’t look aggressive at all!”

“Honestly, that was one of the best things about Cheren.” Lee Andrew replied.

“Finally, someone gets it!” Ruby proclaimed.

“We do not have time to argue about this.” Sapphire said. “Cheren or no Cheren, we need a leader.”

“Yeah, leave it to you to not give a crap.”

“Actually Ruby, I will be remiss if this boy overstays his welcome and will personally grab him by the tail and throw him into space if he does so.”

“R…Really?” Ruby gazed at her partner with admiration.

“I dunno.” said Sind, leader of Sector GT. “When we first wanted to join, Cheren tried to forbid it because we were too big.”

“But then he realized you were pushovers, so he allowed it!” Chimney argued. “CHEREN BEST BOY!”

Argument erupted throughout the chamber, and Evan shrank in guilt. “Oi, Sheila, can’t you tell them to stow it?!” Tani asked.

“Yeh, no can do.” Sheila twisted her pinky in her raccoon ear. “I happily accept you as me mates, but not as a Cheren replacement.”

Seeing that the debate was going nowhere, Jerome announced, “I’m calling an assembly recess! Please return in 10 minutes!”

Sector Q were hanging out in one area, waiting as their teammate, Miko walked over with armfuls of soda. “Boop,” she tossed one to Drake, “boop,” to Quill, “boop,” to Eddy, “water,” that one to Carmine, “and Trick Bonus for Jenny!” She let a can roll down her arm before flicking it to Jenny.

“It’s not that I don’t like that Evan guy,” Quill began, “but if we’re gonna temporarily replace Cheren… shouldn’t it be one of ours, like Francis?”

“Maybe, but Francis has never had the same ‘charisma’ that Cheren did.” Drake replied. “Evan almost has something, but it ain’t enough.”

“Does that mean I have the same charisma as you?” Quill inquired with a smirk.

“Hey, I elected you as vice-leader ’cause you know how to stay focused. I’m the one with the charisma~”

“What kind of reasoning is that?”

“Come on, you know you look up to me!”

“As an equal!”

“Ah, settle down, you guys!” Miko said. “I mean, I like Cheren, too, he’s a nice guy… but come on, we’re about to go to war with pirates!” She pumped her fists excitedly. “It’ll be just like Mercenary’s Oath, where we’ll have to sail around, sink ships, and loot them of their gold! Hype, hype!”

“Speaking of not staying focused.” Eddy remarked.

“Excuse me? You’re Numbuh Me_K.O., right?” They were approached by Nebula.

“Yup, that is ME, all right!” Miko grinned. “What brings you to me, Supreme Leader? Got a special mission for me?”

“I was asked by Sasha to pass on a message for you. When Hyrule was taken over, Sector Hinobi volunteered for a mission to infiltrate the planet. They haven’t reported ever since.”

“They…they what?” Miko’s mood died with her smile. “W…what happened to them?”

“We don’t know. But since you were their teammate, she thought you should know. Sorry I couldn’t tell you more.”

“Oh…” As Miko turned away in gloom, Nebula decided to leave them be.

“So… still hyped?” Eddy asked.

“Eddy, that’s mean!” Carmine yelled.

“Oh, I’m more than hyped.” Miko turned with fierce eyes. “I’m freakin’ HYPER with VENGEANCE!!” Digital flames ignited behind her!

“Heh ha! I guess we don’t have a choice now!” Drake laughed.

Everyone regrouped in the auditorium once the recess was over. None of them seemed especially thrilled to resume their debate, nothing would’ve changed in those 10 minutes. Even King Evan seemed sardonically eager as he took his place before them. “Hello again, everyone. Hope you enjoyed your break. Putting your thoughts into consideration, it’s clear to me you won’t settle for anything less than your Cheren. Well, if you want Cheren so badly, why don’t you go and get him yourselves?!”

The operatives were taken aback by his newfound assertion. “Seriously, why don’t you?! MY subjects risked their lives to save me, and because of that, they were all captured, probably being tortured like all your friends! The worst part is, they would’ve failed were it not for your two operatives lending a hand. And if they were kind enough to save me, what’s stopping you from saving your friends? SO, GET OFF YOUR LAZY ARSES AND GO SAVE THEM!”

There was some murmured discussions before Chimney asked, “And how we s’posed to do that without getting caught ourselves?!”

“If you would shut up and listen, maybe you’d know!” Tani retorted.

“Right now, I want nothing more than to save my kingdom.” Evan continued. “I know that, right now, they’re depending on me to come back for them. So, I’m positive that Cheren is relying on YOU all to save your friends. So, let’s share the burden and rescue them together! Show me what Cheren has taught you and let’s go save EVERYONE!”

“YEEEAAAAAHHH!”

Though no one else could see, the sight was clear on Index’s screen: golden butterflies fluttered throughout the stands. Before, they were being repelled and rejected by the operatives, only to now be welcomed by a newfound motivation: to bring pride to their true leader.

“I’m glad you’re all excited, but I want you to think carefully. You must decide whether or not you truly wish to go to war with the Four Emperors. If you’d rather stay at your homes and be with your families, if you truly think you’re not ready for a battle of this magnitude, there is no shame in that. But if you’re prepared for the worst, then I would like some volunteers. Our first priorities will be to form Rescue and Scouting Parties. I want to meet with every available Sector Leader and discuss a plan. So… show of hands?”

Sector W7 were the first to raise hands. Sector Q wanted in on the action, as did the three members of Sector SA, Sector AC, Sector $, KB, and RZ, whilst other sectors were mixed on their volunteers. “Alright. Leaders, please join me in the meeting room. Let’s show Cheren how far you’ve all come! Kids Next Door FOREVERMORE!”

“KIDS NEXT DOOR FOREVERMORE!” (“Crap, that sounds WAY cooler than ‘Kids Next Door Rulez’!” Drake said.)

Planet Hyrule; January 28

Sector Q had begun their venture up Mount Hebra, where Sector Hinobi was reported to have landed. They saw a crowd of demons gathered and looking at an enclosed area. The six operatives raced up as Drake shot his harpoon through a Fatblin’s head, Eddy blasted fire to melt Ice Lizalfos, and Miko bashed the Tallblin with her hammer to send them sliding down the snow. “Guys, look!” Miko pointed at the wreckage of a ship. The team recognized its Hinobi Technology. “They really did land here… what could’ve happened to them?”

“There’s more coming!” Jenny called attention to some Miniblin surfing down the snow. Using snow-treading rollers, Jenny skated up the mountain to defeat the demons with firm kicks.

“Maybe these guys will have an answer!” Drake hook-palmed. “And if they don’t, they’re gettin’ the 3-hole treatment!”

Chapter Text

Hyrule; Castle Rock

Castle Rock was a medieval-style town that was usually a sight for concerts on Hyrule. Following Mandy’s takeover, it had become a hotspot for demons, particularly the Boogey Pirates’ favorite band, the Butt-Tones. The band consisted of an orange-furred monster in a pirate hat, playing the drums, a giant eggplant with a big mouth, and a green Bokoblin playing the bass. Lately, the band had been advertising their new member, a dark-skinned human with blonde hair, to act as the guitar player. However, it was clear by his prison garb and leg shackles that he wasn’t doing so of his own volition.

“GOOD EVENING, CASTLE ROCK!” the furred drummer announced to the crowds, their stage set up in the back of a monster truck. “The Butt-Tones ft. Mitch Williams are back with a smash hit! Get ready for-”

Bombs suddenly rained out of nowhere around the audience, the demons screaming and scattering. “The only thing getting smashed is YOU, buddy boy!” Jenny Strongarm declared as she skated onto the scene, the operatives of Sector Q at her back.

“MITCH! There you are!” Miko exclaimed. She’d never thought she’d be this happy to see him… or happy to see him at all, for that matter.

Who is that girl? These aren’t the operatives Gaz described. ‘Mitch’ thought to himself. Regardless, he tried to get in character and yelled, “Well, it’s about time you got here! Hurry up and save me!”

“Who do you kids think you are hurting our fans?!” the drummer shouted.

“We’re the Q-Crew, buster!” Drake declared. “Now, hand that big-nosed dope over!”

“Darn it! Fred Fredburger, start the truck! This’ll have to be a mobile performance!”

A green elephant demon did as ordered and quickly sped up the road. “Jenny, we’ll leave it to you!” Drake ordered.

“Hop in, gang!” Jenny held up the Infi-Cube for her team to jump in. With that, the roller-blader began to race after the band. (Play “Castle Rock” from Rayman Legends!)

Stage Q-1: Castle Rock

Mission: Rescue Mitch Williams!

The band was starting what sounded like a rendition of “Black Betty.” As fans were bobbing to the song, Jenny jumped over spikes in the road. The truck drove over a narrow bridge while Jenny grabbed and slid a zipline past it. As she returned to stable road, the truck began to shoot cannonballs timed with the drums. Jenny jumped the blasts using the rhythm to time her actions. It remained consistent for about seven shots, but as the truck drove through a fiery wall, Jenny had to skate up a leaning tower, beginning to chase from along the roofs.

“Whoa, Black Betty (Bam-ba-Lam), Whoa, Black Betty (Bam-ba-Lam),” as the song began, Jenny jumped holes in the roof. Miniblin were stacking up to stop her, but she toppled them with swift kicks, each action timed nicely with the lyrics. The truck blew a hole in the roof that she jumped, and then she leapt atop a scaffolding. During the drum solo, the cannons shot the scaffolding down, but Jenny’s steady skating allowed her to make it across, followed by jumping three tarps and a Fatblin’s head. She skated down a long, falling boardwalk before jumping to a roof. A group of towers fell ahead of her, just in time as she could briefly skate and jump each.

The guitars began to pick up as she leapt to smash through a window, skate downstairs, and exit a building back onto the road. However, she ended up ahead of the truck, its “face” baring sharp fangs. It blew fire at Jenny, who ducked almost totally flat while keeping the momentum. When it stopped, she stretched up, and the cannons fired with quick guitar strums, Jenny hastily jumping left or right. She then dodged to the left as the truck sped up and past her.

The road began sinking as Jenny jumped the separated parts, but she decided to skate into a building, upstairs and through the window, into another, then onto the roof, and up to a telephone wire. She held on and slid down as it carried her across the town. Jenny landed on a roof as the song kicked up, jumped to another, and sped down to the road. The song slowed to an end as Jenny caught up, and with the final lyrics, Jenny leapt level with the band, flicked on her shoe rockets, and BLASTED into the truck! The drummer, bass-player, and the eggplant singer, were defeated with a swift, rocket-powered kick. The truck slowed to a halt as the Q-Crew exited the cube. (End song.)

“I never thought I’d say this, but I’m so glad you’re okay, Mitch!” Miko said.

“Yes, well… I’m quite thankful to see you, too, newb.” Since ‘Mitch’ still didn’t know her name, he decided to address her the way Mitch would.

“Our prolonged months apart has brought us closer.” Drake joked. Carmine found some keys in the drummer’s pocket and unlocked Mitch’s shackles. “So, what happened to the rest of your team?”

“Looks like the fish caught the bait!” They looked up with a gasp as a large, mechanical knight soared down with a solid landing.

“It was that thing!” Mitch yelled. “It ambushed us and separated me from the others! I think they were using me to lure them out.”

“So, that’s why the band kept advertising him!” Quill realized, whipping out his Elementors. “You could’ve warned us before!”

“So, you took out the Butt-Tones, whoop-de-doo. I’m the real boss of these parts, the Ash Knight! You kids gonna surrender or do we have to do this the hard way?”

“We don’t stand a chance against that thing.” Mitch said. “It’s too awesome, even for me to handle! It made me look like a total pushover!”

“Giant… mech?” Miko gawked. “So… AWESOME!” The words INTERESTS = PEAKED appeared above her in digital letters.

“Show it how a pro gamer does things!” Eddy cheered.

“Darn right!” Miko conjured the Q-Knight from her gauntlet, a yellow knight with sci-fi armor, flowing purple hair, and a winking cat on its chest. The solid-holo knight slashed its blade, but the Ash Knight thrusted up its hand to make it fling into the air. This was followed by shoving the Q-Knight back against the truck, pushing the vehicle forward as the team fell over.

“Time to hit the road!” Quill hopped into the driver’s seat, having to use a high-chair and attack heel extensions to see over the hood and stomp the gas pedal. As they sped away, Miko controlled the Q-Knight to float up and fly backward with them. The Ash Knight flew after, but even as Q-Knight swung its reformed sword, her foe was a swift evader, jabbing its sword into the digital knight’s stomach. Miko grabbed the sword and tried to pull it out, but Ash Knight did an aerial spin with the blade to spin the Q-Knight around. “WHOA!” Miko yelped as her knight was flung away. “This guy’s good!”

“We’ve made it out of town!” Quill announced. “Eddy, is the bus almost here?”

“I’m bringing it as fast as I can!” Eddy was knelt down and using his laptop to steer their bus with a first-person view.

“Quit playing chicken, you little twerps!”

“How’s THIS for chicken?!” Miko declared as her knight came flying from behind. She tossed the sword into the air before throwing a punch, the Ash Knight attempting to grab the fist in its legs—Q-Knight pulled back and flew up to grab the sword and chop down—Ash Knight dodge-rolled right and landed a kick to Q-Knight’s head. “You think I wouldn’t know an amateur move like that? I can read your fingers like a book!”

“My fingers?” Indeed, Miko was using the fingers of her glove to control some of the knight’s attacks. “Are you a gamer, too?”

“You know something?” Carmine spoke, shooting the truck’s cannons at the mech. “I’m not sensing any life forms inside that thing.”

“Maybe it’s being remotely controlled.” Eddy figured. “Maybe it works the same as Miko’s where it has a limited range.”

“We ain’t gonna be finding the pilot like this!” Drake said.

“The bus is here! Here goes nothin’!”

Ash Knight saw the bus coming from her left, as if intending to ram her. It prepared to chop its sword down, but the bus suddenly curved right and drove past. The operatives quickly jumped into Jenny’s Infi-Cube as she boosted off the truck and stylishly got into the bus. Her friends came out, and Miko was quick to summon Q-Knight again to intercept Ash Knight’s attack. Quill manned the driver’s seat and sped away. “Let’s try to lose it through that valley!”

“You haven’t seen the last of Me_K.O., Ass Knight!” Miko taunted.

‘Mitch’ narrowed his greenish eyes and turned away. These kids seem to know Mitch’s team, but I won’t be able to keep this act up. I better call Catherine when I have the chance.

A floating Boogey ship hovered in the nearby sky as Gaz controlled the Ash Knight from the deck. “Me_K.O., huh? Alright, I’ll remember that…”

Mogma Town

The Q-Crew had driven into a tunnel to hide from the Ash Knight. They drove out onto a rugged path within a canyon, driving slowly in the dark of night as their headlights could only reveal so much. They could make out the dim lights of a village up ahead. “I don’t think it’s chasing us, anymore.” Quill said. “Let’s park over here and rest. I’ll set up the cloaker.”

He parked over within an indent of the wall and set up the bus’s camouflage. With that, the operatives changed into their pajamas and brought out sleeping bags, laying them on the floor of their bus.

“ALRIGHT!” Miko jumped, hair wrapped in a bun as she wore her mint-yellow sweater and dark-green pants. “That was a great job, team! Let’s recover our HP and get ready for another day of pirate-beating!”

“This isn’t a game, Miko.” Carmine said. “I was worried we weren’t gonna get away.”

“But we’ve been doing great! And we finally got Mitch back!”

“Hah, and I thought Mitch—I mean, I, Mitch Williams, was the cocky one.”

“You’re probably your own number one fan.” Drake remarked. “Still, you owe Jenny some favors later. Her and her awesome skating is what saved you.”

“See, this guy gets it!” Jenny put an arm around Drake with a grin of delight.

“And let’s not forget my awesome remote steering skills.” Eddy boasted proudly as he kicked back on his bag. “I’m shaping up to be a better driver than you, Quill.”

“You are not! I’m pretty sure you drove this thing over three ditches, one of the tires feels deflated.” Quill argued, his bag lain next to Eddy’s.

“Well, that’s the tire’s fault, I thought you would’ve fixed them better.”

“Yeah, well that’s why we don’t spend the night, anymore.”

“’Cause you can’t accept that I’m better at driving games.”

“That, and you wrecked one of my favorite RCs!”

“Do you newbs really have time to argue like this?” Mitch asked. “We’re in the middle of enemy territory. We’ll be lucky if we have time to sleep.”

“Don’t be jealous ’cause you’ve never been to a sleepover, Mitch.” Miko teased, jabbing a finger in his nose. “If that IS your real name~”

“W-What’re you…” Wait, she’s probably just joking. Don’t break character now.

“Hey, Carmine, I got your new Sleepy Helmet.” Jenny held up a gas mask that was indigo-colored with stars.

“Oh, thanks, Jenny!” Carmine slowly pulled off her own helmet, exposing her shriveled and pinkish head.

‘Mitch’ blinked upon seeing her. “My word…”

“Oh, yeah…” Carmine remembered Mitch’s first reaction upon merely seeing her suit. “If I’m too gross for you, you can just sleep outside.” As she spoke, only few and small teeth were seen in her dry mouth.

The impostor assumed that Mitch’s opinion of this girl was unfavorable. “W-Well… yes, it is gross, but… people shouldn’t be ashamed of how they look.”

“R…Really?”

“Yes! You’re a… good person on the inside.” The impostor was probably taking too big a chance, but he couldn’t bring himself to act too mean around someone like this.

“Well… thanks, I guess.” With that, Carmine put the Sleepy Helmet on, its interior relaxing her sensitive skin.

“You’re shapin’ up to be a better leader, Mitch.” Drake said. “A little rough between the lines, but a few more nose punches will get ya there.”

“I like my nose intact, thanks.”

“At any rate, let’s get some shuteye, team. The war ain’t over until the fat lady sings. …Or the fat croc, the noseless lady, or the flying imp, whichever one sings last.”

‘Mitch’ narrowed his eyes at this remark. Within the next few minutes, the friends settled in their sleeping bags, with Mitch resting in a spare. He waited until they were all snoring, their hearts heavy with anxiety. ‘Mitch’ wondered if this was their first time being on a mission this big and if they were worried every night if they could make it through the next day. They’re only trying to find their friends. They don’t seem to want to fight the crew. Sigh…it doesn’t matter. Mandy needs to secure a victory. I don’t know if I could just knock them all out like this, so I’ll play it safe. Catherine should be here soon…

Once ‘Mitch’ had affirmed that the six teammates were asleep, he quietly climbed out of his bag and stepped to the bus’s exit. He slipped out of the camouflaged vehicle and onto the rugged canyon road. Viewing cautiously, he saw a blonde woman in curly pigtails traveling up the path. “It’s about time you got here!” ‘Mitch’ whisper-shouted, stepping closer to the woman.

“Geez, bro, if you’re gonna make me play flirt, I have to look the part.” Catherine replied. “Plus, I’m not even good at adolescents, and this whole canyon atmosphere feels so wrong.”

“Just do what you have to do until Gaz feels like showing up. These kids don’t seem too strong, but we can’t take any chances.”

“Mitch?” The boy flinched and turned around. Carmine seemed to have followed him out. “I saw you get up and leave.”

“You were awake? I was, uh… in need of some air.”

“But you were talking to that woman. Were you… planning to…”

A black, mouthed tendril suddenly shot out from Mitch’s neck and grabbed Carmine, strangling her as she was pulled closer. Nergal, Jr. changed back into his adult form, putting on a pair of glasses. “Sorry, kid. But if it means anything, I wasn’t lying about what I said.”

“N-No!” Carmine tried to grab some bombs, but his other tentacle stopped her from doing so. “H-Help…” Her muffled gasps were barely audible in his hold.

As morning peered over the canyon walls, Eddy Flores was the first to wake from his slumber, the scrawny nerd stretching his thin limbs. “Mmmmm…” he moaned in a silent yawn. Eddy slipped on his glasses and surveyed the bus. His friends were still asleep… including Carmine and Mitch. With a smirk, Eddy dropped one of his socks over Quill’s nose before switching to a new pair, a friendly prank he liked to do on occasion. Afterwards, Eddy peeked outside to check for danger… “Huh?”

There seemed to be a girl running up the canyon path. She had the long ears of a Hylian, wore an orange shirt, and brown dress. Her round ears and armful of books indicated she was a bookworm, and her brown hair was in a cute ponytail. “Whoa!” The girl tripped and dropped all her books and glasses. “Darn it, I’m never gonna make it…”

Eddy didn’t expect to see such an average-looking girl out in a place like this… but truthfully, he thought she looked kinda cute. Eddy stepped out of the cloaked bus and called, “Hey! Do you need some help?”

“Yah!” She jumped at seeing him. “Oh, hi… Where’d you come from?”

“Oh, just around the corner. Heh, my friends and I are camping, and…um, I’ll pick these up for you.” Eddy bent down to collect all the books in a stack.

“Hehe, thank you!” The girl smiled sweetly and took the books from him.

“You’re welcome! Heh, where you off to around here?”

“Oh, this is my usual route to school. Hehe, I live on the other side of the canyon.” She smiled sheepishly. “Takes me an hour… I really should move. Well, I’ll see you!” The girl resumed pace and raced up the road.

“W-Wait!” Eddy tried to jog after. “I can get you there faster!” She seemed to turn and run down a slope to the right. “You can ride in our bus! I’m a great driver, you should see my—AAAAH!” But there was actually no slope as Eddy fell off a ledge.

The girl seemed to change into an elf and climbed back on the ledge, hurrying back to the bus. “I’m using to dating multiple men, but three at the same time is really stressful!”

Quill stirred in his sleep, an unwelcoming scent in his nose. “Ugh!” He shot awake and threw off Eddy’s sock. “I’m gonna kill him…” Quill looked around and saw that Eddy was gone, though the others were asleep. The vice-leader put his shoes on and stomped outside. “Eddy, where are you?!”

“Oh, hey there! Are you looking for someone?” Quill turned to find a blonde elf girl in a green dress and black pants. She was a few inches shorter than him.

“Oh, no, I… not really.”

“That’s a cool hairstyle! Hehe, are you some sort of ‘bad boy’?”

“Oh, me?” Quill brushed back the spikes on his hair that were shaped like engines. “Yeah, you could say that. I’ve been hittin’ towns with my gang.” He smiled boastfully. “Been thinkin’ of hittin’ this one next.”

“Teeheehee! Oh, my! I hope I’m not on your list~!” She swayed teasingly.

“Well, that depends, sweetheart. Know any good restaurants around here? Wouldn’t mind a bite to eat.”

“Hee hee! In that case, follow me!” The elf merrily skipped along with Quill following. Within moments, they arrived at Mogma Town, where the elf led Quill to an ordinary building. “Here we are!” She opened the door.

“Sweet! Let’s see what this place-” Quill walked in first, but she immediately shut him inside.

The elf raced back to the bus and assumed a new form: a teenage Hylian with brown hair in pigtails, a green midriff, and blue shorts. “Alright, just one left. This guy should be easy.”

Drake was awoke by the mild noise and saw that Eddy and Quill were absent. “Up and at ’em already? But then shouldn’t they-”

He heard a light tapping on the door. Drake cocked a brow and put on his sunglasses, going to answer it. The Hylian girl leaned in a nonchalant way. “Hey, dude. It’s a little early for shades, isn’t it?”

“Uhh…can I help you with something?”

“Just saw this bus here and thought it looked cool. Is it yours?”

“This bus is… supposed to be cloaked.”

“I got sharp eyes, baby.” She winked her eyes in a flirting way. “Nothing gets by me, know what I mean?”

“This is weird…”

“I got an eye for cool things, man. And right now, my eyes are on you.”

“These are the most cliché flirting lines of all time. Either way, I don’t really have time to. We need to get going.”

“Oh, but you’re so handsooooome. Can’t you spare a little time for me~?”

“Nah, but I would like to know what you did with my buds.”

“They were goin’ to that town and I just walked by ’em.”

“They wouldn’t have wandered off on their own so willy-nilly. And you’re just full of red flags, so you’re gonna tell me.”

“Maybe they went to that restaurant down the road. Wanna come with-”

Drake SOCKED her in the jaw. “OW!! What kind of jerk just punches a girl?!”

“When a girl gives me bad vibes. Now, where are Eddy and Quill?”

“You’ll never save them!” The girl ran off.

Drake growled and ran to wake up the girls. “Jenny! Miko! Car…mine?” But when he tried, his body simply phased through them, while Carmine herself just disappeared. “Mitch?” The Hinobi leader disappeared as well. “Grrrr! HEY, GET BACK HERE!” Drake dashed out of the bus and after the strange girl. “What did you do to my team—MAAAAAATES!” Drake followed her off what he assumed was a short ledge, only to plummet down a pit. Darkness enveloped him by the time he hit the bottom. “Ow! What the…What’s happening here?!”

“Drake!” The leader looked as Quill and Eddy hurried over.

“Guys! Where did we end up?!”

“I don’t know!” Quill yelled. “I was following this cute elf girl and…”

“Ahahahaha!” The boys gazed up as a strange tower made of blocks seemed to appear out of nowhere. The teenage girl was seated near the top. “See, big boy? You couldn’t resist me~”

“That’s her!” Quill shouted. “That’s the girl I was following!”

“Huh?! That’s the girl I was following!” Eddy argued. “She doesn’t look anything like an elf!”

“Are you kidding?! Just look at her!”

“Okay, knock it off, you two.” The girl teased. Her true appearance was a blonde woman in a white dress. “You boys can picture me however you like. The name’s Catherine and you’ve fallen in my dungeon! The only way to escape is this exit door at the top of the tower. Unfortunately, only one of you can escape.”

“You’re one of Mandy’s pirates, aren’t you?!” Drake demanded.

“You boys better hurry. The floor’s falling.”

They felt their block platforms rumble. “AAAH!” Eddy frantically ran and leapt onto the next layer, the others following before the lower platforms fell into the abyss. “I just wanted to drive you to school!”

“Hey, I would’ve been driving her!” Quill argued. “And besides, you-”

“Shut up and start climbing!” Drake ordered, clambering up a stairway of blocks. Unfortunately, he reached a taller stack with no way to climb up. Drake pulled out the lowest block, but dropped to the next one, so he pulled out the previous block, repeating the process until he made a more convenient stairway to carry them up higher. “’Kind of weird-ass physics are these?!”

“Let’s go up this way!” Quill tried to push an end block off to connect with the bottom corner of another floating block, but the block he pushed merely fell into the pit. “Okay, what defines when blocks float?!”

“Okay, I think I figured this one out!” Eddy began pulling a block across their foothold, with Drake jumping over it to the other side. “Then we climb on,” he climbed on that block with Quill joining, “and pull this one-” he pulled out another block, pushing himself and Quill off.

“WHOA!” Quill yelped as he barely grabbed onto the rim of their current block. “Warn me before you do that!”

“I didn’t tell you to climb up with me!”

“Well, I thought you were bringing us HIGHER!”

“Hee hee hee!” Catherine giggled. “My, which boy will steal my heart tonight~?”

…

Night still loomed in the Waking World with the operatives sound asleep. They were blissfully unaware as E. Carmine was being dragged away in Nergal’s tentacles. “My sister is a succubus. She has trapped the boys inside a nightmare from which only they can wake up. But only one will be able to wake.”

“What?! W-What happens to the other two?!”

“They’ll just remain asleep until the next night, during which time we’ll have you all in confinement. Catherine and I aren’t the most power-heavy crewmen, so we like to play it safe. As for you-”

SCREEEEE! Nergal whipped in the direction of the bus, hearing an earsplitting screech.

“WAAAH!” Jenny and Miko jolted awake. “Okay, I forgot to set the alarm again!” Miko yelled. “Wait…” Upon realizing she wasn’t in her house, she asked, “What was that?”

“That was Carmine’s Sound Bomb!” Jenny pulled up her friend’s sleeping bag. “Did she go somewhere? Hey, why aren’t you three waking up?!” She kicked the boys, but they seemed to be in deep sleep.

“Mitch is gone, too!” Miko realized.

“Darn it!” Jenny quickly grabbed her rollers and sped off the bus, first speeding toward the town. “CARMINE! WHERE ARE—huh?!”

Jenny immediately skid to a halt. In the dim light produced by the village, she could make out the unmistakable form of Queen Mandy. The Emperor herself was holding Carmine by the neck. “It’s easier to do things myself. I’m taking this brat prisoner, and you’d better not follow, or else!”

Jenny bit her lip in fear. She couldn’t just let Carmine be taken, but how could she possibly take on the Emperor? She wasn’t expecting Mandy to suddenly show up here. What was she supposed to…

The bus’s headlights flashed on as Miko took the wheel. “Move aside, Jenny! I’LL wreck this queen!” And she stomped the gas!

Jenny quickly dodged. “MIKO!”

Nergal panicked, realizing his disguise failed. He morphed into a horse, strapping Carmine to the back with his tendrils, and ran aside. Miko stomped the brakes and swerved the bus just against the edge of town. Nergal trotted up another canyon path, Jenny reboarding the bus as Miko steered after. “Miko, you could’ve hurt Carmine!”

“I would’ve stopped! I just wanted to scare her, and it worked! Mandy’s a joke!”

“I don’t think that’s Mandy, it must be some kind of shapeshifter.”

“Dammit!” Nergal cursed as the bus was gaining. “I’ll have to lose them through-”

Fortunately, a mechanical knight dropped down from above with a chop of its sword, Miko abruptly stopping the bus. “It’s YOU, AGAIN!”

“Nergal, it is very late, and I want beauty sleep. If I wake up with pinkeye in the morning, you’re dead meat!”

“Just crush that bus!” Nergal rushed into a cave.

Miko summoned her Q-Knight to clash with the Ash Knight. It easily blocked Miko’s attacks before throwing a kick to Q-Knight’s stomach, followed by a spin attack—Miko ducked and dealt a stab, barely grazing Ash Knight’s hip. “HAH! Got you!”

“A lucky shot!” Ash Knight flew back and charged forward, the Q-Knight grabbing as Miko poured every ounce of strength in her fingers to push back. But Ash Knight pulled back, making Q-Knight stumble forward, and Ash flew up for a slice down! The digital knight was partially severed, its body flickering. Ash Knight dealt a side swipe, but Miko made it duck and stab Ash’s stomach. “Jenny, go help Carmine! I’ll take care of this!”

“By yourself?!”

“I can protect myself, but Carmine looks like she needs help!”

Jenny looked to Carmine’s bomb sacks on a shelf. “Yeah…” She quickly grabbed the sacks and skated off the bus and into the cavern where Nergal fled.

Nergal hurried through the mines in his horse form, Carmine strapped to his back. They trotted past several pirate guards along the way. “Why is Mandy letting you do this? We’re her nephew’s friends!”

“It doesn’t matter. Since the KND are competing in this war, you’re our enemies, too.”

“But we only started because you guys captured our friends!”

“Yeah, well… you guys shouldn’t have been on this planet!”

“Hmph…” Carmine had been fishing for something in her pocket in her bound state and managed to flick it on.

“AAAAH!” A gas grenade suddenly exploded, searing Nergal’s back and tentacles as he dropped Carmine. Her suit managed to keep her safe, and she began to run back the opposite way. “CLOSE THE GATE!”

A Moblin pulled a switch to make a gate rise up from beneath, stopping Carmine in place as she worriedly turned back to Nergal. “CARMINE!” She turned back to see Jenny rolling up, taking down the demons on the way.

“Jenny, pull that lever!” she shouted while dodging Nergal’s tentacles.

“Bloohoo! Not today!” A Wizzrobe suddenly appeared and cast a barrier spell over the lever. Jenny tried to jump and kick him, but he Disapparated.

Jenny looked up and saw the top of the gate had a gap big enough. “Carmine, take these!” She threw the bomb sacks up and over the gate, Carmine catching them. She used her Haki to dodge Nergal’s tentacles and scatters M.A.R.B.L.E.s at his feet, the half-demon jumping back. Nergal extracted five tentacles and stretched them separate directions to surround her. Carmine dodged the munching tendrils and swiftly tossed M.A.R.B.L.E.s in their mouths to explode them, their heads popping into smoke. Nergal retracted them and changed into a horse, quickly trotting left-and-right so as to confuse Carmine. She tried to track him with Haki and dropped a bomb to her right when she sensed he would go there, but Nergal was still able to jump away from the explosion, landing on Carmine’s left and kicking her with his hindlegs.

Carmine felt dizzy in the head, but reacted to roll away before Nergal could jump on her. He whipped his headless tentacles at her, but Carmine got back on her feet and rolled bombs at him. Nergal became a horse again and ran circles around to confuse her. He then charged, but he suspected a sneak attack and dodged to her right to land a kick. However, the previous bomb was a dud, while Carmine had dropped another upon being kicked, exploding beneath him. Nergal reverted to human form, charred and bloody from the blast. “You’re more violent than you look.”

“Normally, I use less lethal bombs… but in this war, I can’t afford to hold back. So, sorry if you’ve been hurt—ow, ah!” One of the lenses of her Sleepy Mask was cracked as she felt a tiny shard of glass in her head. She pulled it off and tried to pick the shard out. “Ow…nnh…”

“Why did you even come?” Nergal asked, hesitant to attack her in this pitiful state. “You’re clearly not in the right condition to survive a wa-”

Carmine was secretly reaching for a M.A.R.B.L.E. and quickly flicked it to Nergal, the man barely dodging as it blew up the ground and charred his right leg. “Because without the KND, I’d just be a helpless bully victim. Risking my life in a war is better than being the class freak.”

“A freak, huh? Yeah… I’ve been there before. Kids weren’t so used to half-demons with tentacles growing out of their-”

Carmine tossed another M.A.R.B.L.E. and blasted Nergal backward. “Hey! I thought we were about to have a heart-to-heart?!”

“Not when my friends are in danger!” Carmine put her helmet on after picking out the shard. “I don’t have time to waste!”

“That’s the spirit!” Jenny called. She had succeeded in KOing the Wizzrobe and disabling the barrier, allowing her to flip the lever. Once the gate lowered, she rolled to tackle Nergal to the ground, but Nergal wrestled back as he assumed Jenny’s form, changing in a way that hid his own wounds. He wrapped both her and himself in the tentacles, sealing both their mouths.

Carmine hesitated in trying to determine the right Jenny. Both were trying to struggle and yell and prompt Carmine to make the wrong choice. “Grrrr!” Carmine grabbed a non-lethal bomb from her pouch. “We’ll see who’s the real deal!” She bravely threw the bomb, both girls perking up as it landed and exploded. A forceful sensation sprung throughout their bodies as Nergal’s hold waned. “Ooooo…” Nergal moaned as he grew back to his adult form, passing out.

The real Jenny helped herself up, stumbling as little on her rollers. “Hoof…y’know, I just woke up, it still could’ve knocked me out.”

“Well, you have great stamina, I thought it wouldn’t matter.” Carmine smiled.

“Heh, let’s just hurry back.”

“Let’s take this man, too. He’s really injured.”

“So, what? He tried to kidnap you. Besides, demons just respawn in the Underworld.”

“He said he was half-demon. Let’s just treat him and tie him up.”

“Alright then. Grab on.”

Outside, Miko’s Q-Knight was derezzed by the Ash Knight, the gamer panting in exhaustion. Miko glared through her baggy eyes while Gaz was smirking behind the scenes. When Ash Knight charged, Miko smashed a button to bring up the bus’s shield. “Miko! Start the bus!” Jenny yelled as she came rolling out, dragging Nergal while Carmine held onto her back.

“Nergal?! That idiot lost!”

“Yeah, so you better stay back or you’ll be hurting him, too!” Jenny threw him onto the bus.

“Eh…no big deal.” Ash Knight raised its sword and chopped down, but Miko quickly backed the bus up. She then sped forward and dodged around the knight, their vehicle bumping violently on the rugged road. “Man, I have no idea where I’m going!” Miko shouted as she drove into a wide tunnel, headlights active as she maneuvered around stalagmites.

“Just try to get us out of its range!” Carmine said. “We need to stable the bus so I can patch this guy up.”

“Carmine, the boys aren’t waking up for some reason!” Jenny mentioned.

“There was a woman with him, a succubus! He said she went into their dreams to trap them.”

“What?! So, what do we do?!”

“I don’t really know… but listen, this guy was disguised as Mitch. I think the reason they were advertising him was to lead his team into a trap.”

“Then where’s the real Mitch?!” Miko asked.

“I don’t know. But he also mentioned another name. He said they were waiting for ‘Gaz’ to show up.”

“G…Gaz?”

“I wonder if that could be who’s controlling the Ash Knight?”

“The Ash Knight…” Miko’s tired eyes widened in realization. “One of the top gamers of the universe… Gaz Membrane.”

“Wait… do you mean QUEEN Gaz?!” Jenny exclaimed. “The queen of Planet Wisp?!”

“Gaz is said to be online rivals with Mandy in the gaming world. No wonder why her moves are so good! It…it’s really her.” A wide smile crossed her features. “I went one-on-one with the Gamer Queen, Gaz Membrane!”

“MIKO, LAVA!” Jenny shouted.

“WOW!” Miko swerved rightward to avoid a pit of lava. There were tiny trickles of magma coursing around the cave walls like blood veins.

“I don’t sense it following us, anymore.” Carmine said. “Try to park the bus somewhere. We need to catch up on sleep. As for the boys… he said that only one of them would be able to wake up. The other two will be knocked out for a while.”

“How’re we supposed to keep going like that?!” Jenny asked.

“I’ll stay up and watch over them.” Miko offered. “Don’t worry, I’m a night owl. I’ll make sure they wake up okay.”

“Sigh…” Jenny could feel the stress creeping up on her. “Yeah… I hope they can all wake up.”

Q-Bus?

Drake, Quill, and Eddy had been climbing the block tower for what felt like hours. They were only 10 levels away from the top, but just as Quill was pulling and pushing blocks to form the next staircase, Eddy suddenly pushed him off the side. “AH, YOU DICK!” Quill cried as he grabbed the rim of a lower block, trying to climb around to safe footing.

“Eddy, you need to quit doing that!” Drake yelled, climbing up after him— “AH!” Eddy shoved Drake off next.

“She said only one of us can escape! I don’t wanna die like this!”

“Yeah, same here, buddy!” Quill made it back up and pushed Eddy, resuming trying to pull out a path. “You always break my cars, so I’m not letting you break my life!”

“Hee hee hee!” Catherine giggled. “You boys really like me! This is so flattering!”

“You two need to cut it out!” Drake ordered, returning to safe ground. “Can’t you see she’s doing this on purpose? For all we know, she’s lying!”

“And what if she’s not?!” Eddy yelled. “There’s so many games I wanted to play! I knew coming here was a bad idea! All to save Miko’s stupid teammates!”

“I was gonna give Kodama the best date ever after this!” Quill argued.

“You were about to hit on some ‘elf’ girl! When I get out of this, I’ll tell Kodama you cheated on her!”

“And I’ll take all your games and-!”

“ENOUGH!” Drake kicked his friends down to a lower level. That layer was about to fall off, so the boys scrambled to climb back up. “Looks like there’s only one way to settle this!” Drake began hurriedly making a stairway. When his friends made it up again, Drake kicked them both down.

“DAMN YOU, DRAKE!” Quill yelled, desperate to get up. “I looked up to you! I—!”

Drake kicked him down again. “Well, get ready to look down!” With a few more moves, Drake had formed a clear path to the top.

“Ooooo! Looks like the big boy gets me after all!” Catherine cheered, taking the form of a Hylian teenager. “I knew I had eyes for the coolest. Well, come on, Drakey.” She kicked open the exit door and stepped aside. “The gate to freedom is yours and yours alo-”

Drake grabbed Catherine and BASHED her head against the doorframe. “OOOOOOWW!”

“Eesh…” Quill and Eddy cringed. Even from here, they were repulsed by the sight of her bloody, dented face.

“I see! When I punched you earlier, it actually hurt! Your pain is real in this dream world!”

“Let me go, you oaf! The only way out of this dream is through the door!”

“Then I guess I ain’t waking up, but neither are you!” Drake wrapped his whole body around Catherine and kicked off the edge.

“AAAAAHH!” Her screams echoed into the abyss, Eddy and Quill watching in horror.

“DRAAAAAAKE!” Quill cried in despair.

“D-Drake…why…” Eddy stuttered.

“Hey, look! There’s all the blocks that fell!” Drake beamed at the pile of blocks that threatened to splatter their bodies. “Bet ya that’s gonna hurt!” Catherine squirmed in his grasp, but Drake grabbed her head and forced her down so that she would hit the rubble first. Her eyes stretched in panic as she was seconds from impacting the point of the highest block. Those seconds passed, and with a split second more, she snapped her fingers—a flash of light enveloped them just as her skull could crack against the point.

…

“AAAAH!” The three boys jolted awake, scaring the girls awake as well. (“Snoooore—whuh? I’M AWAKE!” Miko yelped.)

“AAAH!” Catherine seemed to spring out of nowhere, her face bent like a trench. Her mouth hung agape and her flesh was pale with shock. “I…I…I almost died…I…”

“Guys!” the girls beamed. “You woke up!”

“We… woke up?” Quill asked. “Wait… what happened? …Hey, what’s this girl doing here?”

“I saw this girl running up the canyon.” Eddy said. “What happened to her face?!”

“I know her, too! She was taking me to a restaurant.” Quill mentioned.

“What?! I’m pretty sure she was going to school.”

“But isn’t this the succubus?” Carmine asked.

“Succubus?” the boys chorused.

The girls discussed everything that occurred during the boys’ slumber. “So, this girl… was trying to kill us in our dreams?” Drake asked. “Why don’t I remember any of it?”

“Beats me.” Jenny shrugged. “Maybe it’s a side-effect of her power.”

Catherine continued to sway and babble incoherently. Drake slapped and knocked her out. “I don’t remember what happened, but…” Eddy rubbed his messy light-brown hair, “I have these really bad thoughts in my head. I feel like… I said some pretty bad things in the dream.”

“I feel like I did, too.” Quill said. “…Hey, Eddy? I know this seems out of nowhere, but you kinda piss me off sometimes. But I don’t want you to die.”

“Well, that’s comforting.”

“You could at least say the same thing!”

“Alright, I don’t want you to die either. Even though you’re a crybaby.”

“Ugh.”

“No matter what we might’ve said, the fact is we’re alive now.” Drake smiled. “These pirates took us off guard, but we showed them! That’s why we’re the best!”

“Somehow, I feel like you did something really stupid.” Eddy replied. “Like… I get the weird sensation you almost died.”

“Yeah, me too.” Quill nodded.

“Feels like I still have a pulse to me! And I expect all of you to live through this war, you hear me?”

“Hehe, aye-aye, Captain!” Carmine saluted.

“Then let’s drop this bimbo in the holding room and get going.” Quill decided. “Where did you say you drove us, Miko?”

“In a volcano.”

When Quill manned the wheel, he steered them to an exit of the cave. They truly did appear to be somewhere on the side of a volcano, driving along a cliff over a pool of lava. The morning could faintly be seen over the cloudy horizon. “Not the most welcoming sight to wake up to.” Miko said.

“I remember hearing that Castle Rock was built near Mogma Volcano.” Eddy said. “This must be it.”

“Let’s just turn back the way we came.” Quill decided, stopping the bus. “Maybe we can ask these two where they locked-”

“RISE and SHINE, little cave rats!” The Ash Knight descended onto the path.

“What?! Already?!” Jenny yelled.

“It’s just tracking us everywhere!” Quill exclaimed.

“The jig is up, Gaz!” Miko proclaimed. “We know who you are!”

“Huh? So, you figured out who I am. I guess I can’t let you leave this planet alive.”

“Yeah, well I’m ready for you this time! My focus levels are pumped through the roof after that night, you don’t stand a chance with-”

“Ah, now what’s going on down here?”

This echoing, ominous voice certainly didn’t belong to Gaz, but it sent an unsettling chill down their spines. The earth quaked when a huge mass crashed atop the wall beside them: an armored, vicious dragon. “Smaug! What’re you doing here?”

“Smaug?!” Eddy panicked. “The dragon that they mentioned?!”

“There are a lot of annoying flies trying to take me down.” Smaug hissed. “I thought I’d come for a drink of my favorite hot spring, but I see a few flies have made it here.”

“Wellp, backing up now!” Quill switched to Reverse and stomped the gas, speeding backwards, but Smaug spat a fireball directly ahead of them, exploding as it bounced their bus forward.

“Hey, these kids are my prey, Smaug!”

“Not anymore! I’m feeling hungry!” Smaug flapped up and SMASHED the Q-Bus beneath his claw without hesitation!

But Jenny was able to jump out of the bus just in time, her friends and the prisoners inside the Infi-Cube. She dashed up the path with all the speed she could muster, dodging Smaug’s claws and the fire that he spat ahead. She skated steadfast up the volcanic path with her friends’ lives in her hands. (Play “Dragon Slayer” from Rayman Legends!)

Stage Q-2: Dragon Rush

Mission: Escape Smaug’s wrath!

Jenny skated down a slope and jumped toward a platform over some lava. Smaug blasted a fireball, but she ducked before jumping to the next platform. One platform curved sideways, but Jenny stayed on it with her momentum and jumped to another, which curved left before she jumped to the next. When she jumped the next sequence, she kicked away some Kargaroks that were swooping down to bite her. Jenny landed on a straight road and had to alternate between ducking or jumping Smaug’s flames.

After the last jump, Jenny found herself zooming down a steep hill. A Miniblin horde tried to impede her, but she blew them down with a swift kick. Another horde tried, but Smaug’s fireball crashed on them like a meteor, though Jenny jumped over the flames in time. Two fireballs crashed between a geyser, but she jumped in as it erupted, blowing her across a series of diagonal geysers that faced each other. Jenny landed on a high platform, performing quick jumps across other small platforms, then having to combine ducks and jumps when Smaug’s flames flew. Jenny flew and landed on a ramped edge, the momentum zooming her up, a line of geysers erupting at her back before a larger geyser BLEW her across the lava!

Jenny landed on a new path—a series of wood fences blocked her, but she switched on her rockets and BLASTED through them, riddling her face with splinters! Another geyser suddenly blew her back across the lava, Jenny screaming as Smaug nearly bit her in his teeth. She landed on a road that curved up into a wall, in which several lavafalls poured down. She dodged left, then right, and rinse and repeat. As she kicked off to a stable path, she was skating to Smaug, dodging three fireballs before a ramp launched her over the dragon’s head. She skated across his rugged back, but jumped when he tried to shake and landed on another slope downward. Smaug soared after her, trying to bite from any angle, but she reacted to dodge him. He spat quick fireballs at the ground, but she jumped each one, eventually to land in another geyser.

She was blown to another slope, jumping three spires of lava as she zoomed down, and landed in one more geyser that finally blew her to the edge of the volcano. Jenny continued to race across the rugged ground with the dragon in pursuit. (End song.)

“Hey…!” Jenny saw a horde of people charging in their direction. They didn’t look like demon pirates, but the group consisted of Pumparians, Solarans, and some Glomourians. “Hey, guys! Other operatives are here!”

Sector Q jumped out of the Infi-Cube. “Who are you guys?!” asked Pyler, the purple-flamed Solaran leader.

“We’re Sector Q, from Earth! What’s going on?” Drake asked.

“We’re trying to kill this dragon, that’s what! Watch out, he’s coming!” The horde ran past as Smaug crashed back on the ground.

“You little flies just can’t get enough, huh? I’ll just have to roast you all!” He blew a charged flame that the Solarans worked to defend, but they were blown back by the force.

“What should we do?” Carmine asked. “Should we just try to escape?”

“Miko? Miko, is that you?!”

The gamer gasped and whipped around. Five familiar faces stood at their backs. “F..F…FIVE!!”

Sector Q turned to meet the faces of Sector Hinobi. “HAH! It’s about time you guys showed up!” Drake exclaimed.

“Us?!” Zahra questioned. “We’ve been here for weeks, you’re the ones who showed up out of nowhere!”

“Five, I’m so glad you’re okay!” Miko ran to hug her best friend.

“I just knew you’d show up, Miko! We got separated from Mitch and we’ve been trying to find him ever since. We decided to check that theme park over there before we saw a bunch of operatives going to fight that dragon. Then we just kinda joined in.”

“So, Mitch isn’t with you guys? We were looking for him, too, but we-”

“Hey guys, less talky, more dragon bashy!” Pyler yelled, shooting a Fire Bullet into Smaug’s throat. He felt it burst inside him and coughed out smoke, but then performed a spin to knock operatives away with his wings.

“What do you wanna do, Miko?” Five asked.

Miko faced up at the dragon with determined eyes. Above him, the Ash Knight soared down from an airship in the sky. “I don’t mind staying to fight a dragon and a robot knight.”

“A knight? Oh, nerds! Miko, that’s-!”

“I know, it’s Gaz.”

“We can’t fight both of those things!” Bergy exclaimed.

“No, they can’t handle all of us!” Drake declared, his harpoon ready. “Let’s kick their afts!”

“We’re eating dragon meat tonight!” Haneesh cheered.

“Okay…” Carmine narrowed her eyes fearlessly. “Let’s do this!” (Play “Engage the Enemy” from Xenoblade!)

The operatives had been brushed away by the flapping of Smaug’s wings. After hours of chasing and fighting him, the dragon was showing almost no fatigue, smirking ravenously at the tired swarm. “Damn… if only I could get him in the eye.” Drake said. “He always blinks when I shoot there!”

“Let me try!” Quill used a jetpack to fly up, dodging Smaug’s flames and trying to shoot ice at the eyes, but had to quickly dodge the dragon’s fangs when he got close. Jenny began to boost around the dragon, having installed spiked wheels to try and pierce through his armored claws. Solarans shot and directed fire at Smaug’s eyes while the Glomourians attempted to chip through the armor with airwaves from their swords.

Meanwhile, Miko and Sector Hinobi surrounded the Ash Knight, trying to strike it with their solid-hologram weapons. Though each attack was able to make Gaz’s control fizzle just a tad, her control was ever excellent as she dodged the Q-Knight’s swings and dealt quick counters. She performed a diagonal spin to banish Five, Haneesh, and Zahra, and when Bergy got under the legs and tried to shoot the mech’s pelvis, he was kicked away. Miko ran up from behind and leapt to bash the knight’s head with her hammer, but Ash Knight withstood the internal damage and flicked her away. “So, this is the power of the Gamer Queen…” Five panted.

“I gotta say, it’s kind of an honor to be fighting you, Gaz.” Miko said earnestly, pushing herself off the ground. “But why are you working for Mandy? Why are you helping her take over this world?”

“You kids wouldn’t understand, but life gets boring when you’re a benevolent queen of a planet. I wanted the thrill of the old days, the feeling of conquering a planet! Flying around with my awesome mech and bagging all the rebellious brats!”

“Isn’t your son in the Kids Next Door?!” Zahra questioned. “What if he were here? Would you attack him, too?”

“That’s all part of the sport, isn’t it? That’s the classic KND way.”

“You’re terrible!” Five shouted. “Trying to hurt all of us just because you were bored?! When we tell everyone about this, you can kiss your career good-bye!”

“Heh! Then I guess I better finish you off right-”

“RAAAAH!” Smaug furiously swatted the operatives away from him and flapped up to smash a few aliens under his claws. “I need some MEAT!” The dragon stomped over to the Hinobi agents and, with no hesitation, chomped Haneesh in his teeth.

“AAAAH—!” His teeth enclosed on the dark-skinned boy and chewed him to pieces.

“!!!” Miko and her friends were utterly horrified, frozen like statues with their shock-ridden expressions. “HANEESH!!” Bergy cried.

“SMAUG!” Gaz tried to stab the dragon’s forehead. “WHAT DID YOU DO?!”

“You don’t want them to blab about your identity, right? Then it’s best if they die!”

“We weren’t supposed to kill any of the operatives!”

“I heard you on the volcano! You said you can’t let them leave alive!”

“I was just trying to scare them! It was all part of the act!”

Smaug leapt, grabbed, and SMASHED the knight against the ground. “Well, I’m done acting! I’m playing this game my OWN way!” As he smashed the Ash Knight to pieces, Smaug turned and blew a wave of fire over the Pumparians, charring four of them to a crisp, including the Pumparian leader, Pluey. The remaining operatives scattered as he blew his fire everywhere.

E. Carmine hid behind a rock during his rampage. “Maybe I can shoot this in his mouth…” she said as she loaded a grenade into her launcher. She saw Quill flying overhead as Smaug kept his eye on him, about to breathe fire at the vice-leader. The moment he fired, Carmine took the shot.

However, right then, Drake had attempted to shoot his harpoon in the dragon’s eye. Smaug saw this and grabbed the harpoon in his teeth, swinging Drake forward. His swing was right in the grenade’s trajectory… and the explosive went off.

“!!” Carmine internally paled as the explosion engulfed her own friend. He crashed on the ground, ripped and charred. Smaug made sure to finish the job by unleashing his breath over Drake’s fallen body. “NOOOOOOOO!”

The Sector Q leader was left totally black and dead. Completely overcooked and unrecognizable from his former self. His teammates couldn’t believe what they just witnessed. Their leader… always cool-looking, strong, caring, and dependable… he was… “DRAAAAAAAAKE!”

“Your cries of agony are annoying. Why don’t you brats just give up and die?!”

The operatives gasped as a figure fell directly from above Smaug. She raised a mechanical gauntlet in the air and extracted a huge, digital axe. She swung down and CHOPPED the axe against Smaug’s forehead, the dragon slightly reclining from the force as the purple-haired woman landed on his head. “Hur…don’t have a robot to hide behind, do you? I’ll just have to burn you, too-”

Gaz whipped the glove’s palm at his eyes and FLASHED. “AAAAAHH!” Smaug’s pupils receded as he frantically shook Gaz off his head. “What have you done to me?! I’m blind! Eyedrops! I need eyedrops!” The dragon flapped his wings and flew across the valley in a wobbly manner. “Where is that damned Goron with the eyedrops?! Aaaagh! Azula! Call Biggoron, now!” (End song.)

“Huff…huff…” Five gasped for breath. “He’s gone… He…he…”

Sectors Hinobi and Q looked over Drake’s charred body. The Pumparians mourned for their leader and friends, and Pyler’s flame died as they looked over the smashed Solaran bodies. Hinobi couldn’t bear the sight of Haneesh’s remains.

“It’s my fault…it’s all my fault…” Carmine couldn’t restrain herself. “AAAAAAHHH!”

“C-Carmine!” They watched as their friend ran in the direction of the volcano… yet, they couldn’t bring their selves to stop her. Neither of them really knew what to do now. Their leader was dead… they were completely overwhelmed. They had no will to go on.

“…” Miko glared at Gaz, standing still and composed. The woman’s eyes had opened into a squint, a rare occurrence. And through that squint, Miko could make out anger and regret. “That glove you’re wearing… that’s Mitch’s glove, isn’t it?”

“…”

“Was this all just a game to you?”

“…” Gaz turned and walked away. None of the operatives felt the urge to stop her.

“I…I can’t believe it turned out like this.” Five said. “Han…Haneesh.”

“…” Miko sighed. “I’ll… go get Carmine.” She turned in the direction their friend ran and walked at a half-hearted pace.

Chapter Text

Hyrule; Mogma Mines (Play “Sad Olivia” from Mario: Origami King.)

Miko found a cave near the edge of the volcano. Judging by the large footprints in the soil, she deduced that Carmine had run in here. She didn’t have the energy to call out to her or to move faster than she already was. As she walked deeper into the mine, there seemed to be colored gems lodged in the soil, softly flickering on and off to provide light to this dimness. There were Mogmas digging around the soil, a race of yellowish, long-armed mole creatures.

“Hey, Ledd! What was that weird alien thing that just came past?”

“I dunno, Flint, but that moaning sound was kinda creepy. We’d better stay away from it.”

Miko passively glanced at the Mogmas, but felt her shoe bump something. It was Carmine’s helmet. Miko silently picked it up and followed the trail into a left tunnel. It led to a wider tunnel with several doors and socializing Mogmas. “Hey, check out this goil!” a Mogma pointed. “Lookin’ at that getup, you look like you’re on your way to a party. You won’t get to Castle Rock through here.”

“…” Miko only gave him a cold stare and continued, crossing a few small bridges to reach one of the doors. The door looked like it had been forcefully yanked open, so she entered. Miko went up a small staircase past some conversing Mogmas. “That thing looked like some alien that escaped from a madhouse. I don’t wanna go near it!”

“Maybe it escaped from that new theme park over yonder?”

Miko stepped up to a door leading to the second level of the village. She crossed a narrow ledge to another door that a Mogma was peeking into. “Yah!” the mole yelped, realizing Miko was behind him. “Don’t sneak up on me like that! Hey… you wouldn’t happen to know that thing that just ran past? It’s makin’ a scary sound. …” The Mogma looked Miko in the eyes. “You look a little under the weather yourself. I dunno what’s up, but… just do what ya gotta do.”

The Mogma dug away and let Miko enter the door. Faint rays of light shone through the gaps of the tunnel as Miko could hear Carmine’s sobs echoing eerily. She stepped forward slowly, seeing Carmine’s discarded gloves. Soon, Miko found her friend sitting on a rock within a wider ray of light. Her form was hunched over a pond of clear water, reflecting her shriveled and miserable visage. Miko calmly approached and sat beside her.

Carmine saw Miko’s reflection appear, but couldn’t look up. “It’s my fault… I…I killed Drake… I wasn’t ready for this… I never should’ve come… I was right not to go to New Galaxia… ’cause if we did… the same thing would’ve happened… I’m just not ready for war…”

Miko really wasn’t sure what to say to her. She knew a pep talk wouldn’t work here… especially since she had no motivation for it. The best she could do was try to take the blame away. “It…it’s my fault. I’m the one who wanted to come here… and I was looking at it all wrong. I was… trying to have fun. I was so excited to be on such a big mission with my new friends… and I thought nothing was gonna go wrong. But now Haneesh… and Drake…” Miko could no longer restrain herself as tears streamed down her face. “I never should’ve joined this team!”

Miko could only sob for the next few minutes as her tears dripped the pond. “I should’ve just gone back to Hinobi! Then, when this happened, at least Drake wouldn’t have died! I’m the one who dragged you into this…”

“Maybe… but you’re way better than me. When I got my accident… Drake still wanted me in his team. He still believed in me… he didn’t think I was gross, or helpless… and I didn’t wanna be useless, either. I did my best to get better… so I could still be useful. But I betrayed them… I betrayed Drake… I even let myself get captured before… After all this, I really am just the worst…”

“No… you’re not.” Miko softly put her arms around Carmine’s shoulders. “It was an accident… Drake wouldn’t be mad at you.”

“You don’t know that… Deep down… what if Drake still pitied me? What if he was always worried about me? He…he’s probably angry at me… right now…”

“I guess I don’t… It’s been less than a year since I met you guys… so, maybe I don’t know how he really feels. Or how the others feel. But I think you’re great. I think you’re very brave… and you took this mission a lot more seriously than I did. I’m gonna get you guys home… and I’ll look for Mitch on my own. I won’t trouble you guys, anymore.”

“…” Carmine lay her head on Miko’s chest. Miko softly put an arm around her swollen head, feeling Carmine tense up and quiver. However, Carmine tried to be still and accept her friend’s warmth. She remembered how Drake used to do this… he was never grossed out by the feel of her squishy, ugly head. Even though it hurt, Drake knew she needed some reassurance once in a while. And Carmine welcomed it…

“Well… let’s go back to the others. Wanna put your stuff on?”

“No. I…I need the air.”

“Okay…”

Miko calmly walked Carmine through the mine, ignoring all the curious looks and comments from the Mogmas. Holding her bare hand, she could feel Carmine quivering from the exposure. Perhaps Carmine wanted to let herself suffer… but even so, Miko was glad to be able to look her in the eyes, to be able to share her feelings.

When they exited the cave, Sectors Q and Hinobi waited for them. “H-H-Hi, guys…” Carmine stuttered. “I’m… sorry.”

“No… it’s my fault.” Miko said. “I’m the one who deserves your blame…”

Eddy looked away. Internally, he had been growing more frustrated over this whole situation, all to save Miko’s teammates. It seemed like she had acknowledged that… but he couldn’t bring himself to agree. “Let’s just get off this planet. There are some ships here to take us.”

“We’re sorry… for making you guys come here.” Bergy bowed.

“It’s fine…” Jenny sighed. (End song.)

After the operatives were called back to H.Q., some of them gathered in the morgue, where their fallen friends lay at rest in capsules. “Sally Harper, killed by Pink Monkey of the Kremling Krew.” Jerome said, walking past her still, peaceful form. “Darcy Chariton, killed by Aranea Serket, Sky God Pirates.” The wound through Darcy’s stomach had been patched. Jerome then walked by a capsule with a blackened, burned corpse whose gender could not be identified, and Quill Ramsey was beside it. “Drake Puncture, burned alive by Smaug, Boogey Pirates. He killed a few alien operatives, too, including Pumparian leader Pluey, and Sector Hinobi operative Haneesh.”

“Smaug is burning in Hell now, I promise you that.” Cheren assured. “How are the others doing, Quill?”

“We couldn’t really fight any more after the fact.” Quill replied. “We’re all pretty shaken up.”

“You can still return home if you want.”

“As the new leader, I think the wisest choice would be for us to do that. But I’ll ask how the others feel. A part of me still feels… we need to see this fight through to the end.”

In the cafeteria, a holographic chart was displayed, showing all the high-ranking officers under each Emperor.

Boogey Pirates

Mandy (Queen)
Sivam (Top Commander)
The Divine Beasts
Azula (Flame Commander)
Smaug (deceased)
Rā’s al Ghūl (Assassin Commander)
Cortez (Phantom Commander)
Bellum (Phantom General)
Cindy Cortix (Undead Pet Commander)
Gaz Membrane (secret officer)
Creeper (threatening?)

“Imperator Giz would like to raise an objection!” declared the Supreme Leader of the Irken KND. “My mother cannot be in Mandy’s crew! She told us she was going to Solana for a gaming tournament!”

“And did you ever check in with her or confirm that?” Nebula asked.

“Giz, I know what I saw.” Miko stated. “I know the Gamer Queen when I see her! But even though she kept attacking us, she protected us from Smaug. It almost felt like she thought of this whole thing as one big game. But games stop being fun when people die for real.”

“But I…Giz can’t believe this! Mother always jokes about conquering others, but to actually become an invader… it’s maddening!”

“Then why don’t we go down there and see for ourselves?” asked his cousin, Knaab.

“We have a score to settle with her first.” Miko replied. “Sorry to ask this, but… let us go ahead of you.”

“Imperator Giz will allow this. But only ONCE!!”

“Knock it off…” Knaab sighed.

Miko Kubota was about to board a Hinobi truck with her old team. She turned at seeing Sector Q follow her. “You guys don’t have to come with me. We’ll find Mitch… but you don’t have to get hurt for our sake, anymore.”

“Maybe… but it wouldn’t feel very satisfying unless we saw the mission through to the end.” Quill replied. “We promised to help you find all your friends… so, we gotta finish. But we’ll leave you to your fight.”

“…Alright then.”

Near Kakariko Village

The teams of the Q-Crew and Sector Hinobi located a Sheikah Tech shrine in the hills above Kakariko. A minimal amount of pirates tried to impede their progress by the time they found it, the door to the shrine left open. The nine operatives crowded inside and rode an elevator deep underground. “This is too easy…” Five said worriedly. “She’s obviously leading us into a trap.”

“That’s why we have a bunch of backup waiting outside.” Quill figured. “But honestly, if Gaz really feels bad for what happened, why doesn’t she just meet us outside and turn herself in?”

“Well, that’s the thing about gamers.” Miko said. “We can be really stubborn about things.”

“Why should that matter?! We lost two friends to that monster and she think we have time for games?!”

“Yeah, well that’s what I’d like to know myself! Frankly, I’m not even sure if I deserve to be here! I’m not even sure if I-”

“Can we please stop yelling?!” Carmine requested. “This is a really tight space, it’s making me nauseous.”

Miko bit her lip and looked away in guilt. “…if I… deserve to be on this team, anymore.” She finished her sentence in a meeker tone.

Before any of them could think of a response, the elevator stopped. With one last anxious look, the friends stepped off and entered a wide, dark room with blue virtual lines netted across the wall and ceiling. Gaz Membrane stood lonely in the center, Miko approaching her first. “So, you found my Hinobi account, huh?”

“You announced your screenname loud and clear, so I had to oblige.” Gaz replied.

“So, what is it you wanted to say?”

Gaz hesitated a moment before speaking. “…You were right. I only joined this crew because I thought it would be fun. Mandy promised that no KND operatives would die… and they would just be imprisoned. But Smaug was a wildcard. I should’ve stopped him as soon as he showed up. I’m… sorry.”

“That’s not gonna bring Drake and Haneesh back.” Eddy stated. “The least you can do is turn yourself in.”

“And you better tell us where Mitch is!” Bergy demanded.

“Yeah, that would be the honorable thing to do… but the fact is, I already have a part in this war. I’m obligated to help Mandy win. Even if the most I can do is stop you kids, I won’t back down.”

“So, you’re going to fight us anyway, huh?” Zahra glared. “Fine… let’s get it over with!”

“Sorry, but I’m only interested in fighting the purple-haired wannabe.”

“Why the hell would we go along with that?!” Jenny shouted.

“Yeah, and ‘purple-haired wannabe’?” Miko questioned. “What, are you saying that only you’re worthy to have purple hair?”

“Against all of you, I’ll probably get my butt kicked. My skills lie primarily in gaming or robots that work with game controllers. So, it’s only fair we settle this the fair way.” Gaz snapped her fingers, and a barrier suddenly appeared to separate Miko from her friends.

“Miko!” Five yelled, the friends trying to attack the barrier. “You coward! We’re gamers, too, let us in!”

“I’ll kick all your butts after I’m done with her. Well?”

Miko glared at the woman. She could believe that her apology was genuine, but she could feel that Gaz was retaining some feelings. Miko herself would always get lost in games as a way to repress her feelings. “Fine then.”

“Then take that control station over there.” Gaz approached a terminal on the left while Miko took the right. They both had Sheikah Slates attached. “This shrine is a VR simulator built with all kinds of games. It was probably meant to be used for training, but most people use it for fun. So, what type of game do you want? Fighting? Space-shooter? Dancing?”

“Let’s keep it simple and fight.” Miko answered.

“Then let’s make us some armor.” Gaz clicked the ‘Fight’ option on her slate. A dark-red, digital sci-fi armor appeared over her, with bulky gloves and sharp-toed boots. Miko acquired similar, light-violet armor. Both gamers walked to the center of the room. “I’m ready when you ar-”

Miko threw the first punch, Gaz dodging and swinging a spin-kick at Miko’s head. Miko recovered and charged, dodging Gaz’s attacks before attempting to kick her off her feet. Gaz fell, but performed a breakdance kick, which Miko jumped before landing on Gaz’s stomach. She dropped and punched her face twice, until Gaz grabbed both Miko’s arms, pushed herself up, and threw her off. Miko ran to throw fake-out punches before side-dodging, afterwards trying to mix in real punches. In the midst of a punch, Gaz grabbed Miko and hauled her to the ground, afterwards jumping to stamp Miko’s face with her heel.

Miko grabbed Gaz’s ankle and tried to pull her down, but Gaz freed herself with a flip and kicked Miko’s stomach. Miko got up and came at Gaz directly, tanking the woman’s punches while dishing out her own, but Gaz avoided most of her hits while punching Miko’s head. Miko dodged behind for a kick to Gaz’s back, but Gaz retaliated by punching down against Miko’s knee. Miko stayed strong on her other leg as she kicked away from the next punch, only for Gaz to swing a kick up at Miko’s chin. The holo-armor protected her, but to Miko’s misfortune, her armor derezzed. “What?! What kind of cheap junk is this?”

“Your armor ran out of HP.” Gaz smirked, the word WINNER flashing above her. “When you’re out of HP, you lose.”

“Heh, I got plenty of HP to spare!” Miko raised her Hinobi Gauntlet and conjured her purple K.O. Hammer, bringing it down. Gaz dodged and used her own gauntlet to swing a bigger hammer and bash Miko away. Miko recovered and charged at Gaz once more, dodging the latter’s hammer smash while retracting her own hammer into a larger fist. Miko leapt to land an aerial punch, but Gaz formed a bigger fist of her own and impacted Miko’s. The younger gamer was flung away, but Miko summoned Ally to save her. The red ostrich ran circles around Gaz before charging from behind, but Gaz suddenly bent back with the hammer materialized, smashing Miko and Ally underneath.

“Huff…huff…” Miko weakly pushed herself up, her ostrich having derezzed. “That glove belongs to Mitch… you have no right using it!”

“You’re the one who attacked first. You can’t accept that you lost.”

“Then let’s go another round! One way or another, I WILL beat you!”

“Sigh…if you say so.” Gaz calmly walked back to her control station. “But for the sake of our physical stamina, how about we just use handheld controls this time? I’m ready when you are.”

“Ugh…If you think you’re so good, why don’t you take all of us?!” Quill shouted. “You coward!”

“Take her down, Miko!” Jenny yelled. “You better not lose!”

“Huff…” Miko cracked a smile on her bruised face. “That was never an option!”

Miko’s holo-robot dodged behind Gaz’s to grab its arms, only for Gaz’s to haul itself forward and down, both their heads smashing against the ground. Gaz continued the roll to lay Miko on her back, Gaz getting up and performing a quick flip maneuver to try and stomp her. Miko dodge-rolled and flipped up to punch Gaz’s head. Gaz reeled back, but her foot flew up to kick Miko upward. Gaz tried to attack as she fell, but Miko air-dodged—Gaz predicted this and was quick to grab Miko and slam her to the ground, reducing Miko’s HP to five. Miko pulled herself free and performed another flip to kick Gaz down, afterwards pouncing on the woman’s mech and laying a flurry to Gaz’s head. Gaz’s HP was beat down to 2, but the woman grabbed Miko’s mech and slammed her to the side, eradicating her HP as the mech derezzed. “KO!”

“That’s four losses in a row.” Gaz said. “You tired, yet?”

Miko’s eyes were growing heavy and pinkish, her fingers numb with button-mashing. “I could stay up all night playing this game…”

Outside the barrier, the Hinobi agents were struggling to derez the barrier with their tech, with Eddy trying to hack through it as well. “Man, I didn’t expect the Sheikah to be so tech-savvy.”

“Miko and I play fighting games all the time.” Five said. “And she always wins. Is Gaz really that good?”

“Well, duh.” Gaz remarked simply. “You may have been playing videogames your whole life, Miko, but so have I. Age goes well with experience. Every person has a talent they naturally adapt to, a skill that they’re unbeatable at. But no matter how strong you are, there will always be someone stronger. You’re learning from me as much as I’m learning from you, so as long as we can predict each other, you can never defeat me.”

“Yeah, well I’m a girl who always goes for the high score. If there’s a score higher than mine, I WILL beat it!” Miko declared, firmly grabbing her controller again.

“We’ll see about that.” Gaz took hold of hers once more, their mechs buzzing to life once again.

The next few moments could be made into a montage with Taylor Swift’s “Shake It Off.”

“’Cause the players gonna KO! KO, KO, KO, KO! And the haters gonna KO! KO, KO! KO! Baby, I’m just gonna KO KO, KO KO KO! I shake it KO! Shake it KO!”

By the end of this supposed montage, Miko would be slouching on her knees, panting with heavier, gloomier eyes. Her bulky fingers were growing numb, while Gaz stretched and flexed her smaller fingers.

“I can’t believe this lady.” Jenny said, trying to kick the barrier. “She tries to apologize to us, but she’d rather humiliate Miko at games than give us a fair fight?!”

“To be fair, it’s not really the worst thing.” Carmine inferred. “Miko’s injuries aren’t too-”

“Why don’t you throw some bombs and help us?!”

“!!” Carmine flinched at the demand. She turned away, not wanting her friends to see her shock-ridden eyes.

“…” Jenny’s face fell, realizing what she said. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

“…” Carmine spared her a light glance before facing the wall again.

“…Hey, MIKO!” Jenny yelled. “Let us have a turn! You need to rest!”

“I’m not tired, yet! I almost got her that-”

“MIKO!” Quill shouted. “Get out of there and rest! That’s an order!”

“…” Miko bit her lip in guilt. She really thought she could win if she kept trying… but there was no sign of victory, and even her teammates were growing impatient. “I…I’m sorry.” Her head hung low, Miko walked to the barrier. A gap opened wide enough to let her out, while Jenny was allowed in the same way.

“Man, this barrier is complete BS.” Jenny mumbled.

Miko sat against the wall with her legs propped up. She began sobbing and crying into her knees. Five and Carmine sat on either side of her. “I couldn’t… I really couldn’t avenge them after all.”

“You did your best.” Jenny looked back and told her. “Now it’s my turn.” She calmly skated to the control pad. “Are there any skating games on this thing?”

“Of course.” Gaz smirked.

A small, mechanical spider crawled down from Jenny’s pocket. Its eyes displayed a live view via Eddy’s glasses. “Maybe it’ll be easier to hack from the source…”

Later…

Jenny and Gaz were mounted on skateboards as the shrine projected a virtual illusion of a power plant skate course. The “sky” was pitch-black while the structures resembled giant lava lamps of electrical currents. Jenny launched off a fifty-foot ramp and did a back-flip and diagonal front-flip, flexed her right leg around her front and back, then propped her hands against the board as she clacked her heels in the air—barely returning to her upright position in time to land on a narrow track that curved right. She grinded her board along the left rim, stood on one hand, and twirled around six times, but her hand inched to the side and nearly made her lose balance. She landed on her feet and regained control of the board on the track, which launched her off a ramp as she spun leftward three times.

Jenny landed on stable ground and glanced up at the scoreboard: she was over 110,000 points while Gaz was breaching 115,000 and counting. (Neither of them were actually moving, it was simply the projection moving around them, and both were segregated in their own course.) Jenny skated into a bowl and did a cartwheel around the rim, followed by a tornado spin, then aerial, diagonal spins. Jenny skated backwards out of the bowl and into the air, performing some flips—“AAAH!” she bumped her head against a moving rail on a track, causing her to trip off the board.

The simulation disappeared. “Heh. You fell off first this time.” Gaz said. “But my score was still higher. That’s five losses in a row.”

“Psst. Eddy.” Quill whispered. “How’s it going?”

“I’ve almost cracked the system. You may have to sit through at least one more game.”

“I won’t just be sitting. HEY, GAS! How about having a crack at me?!”

“You must feel very clever to think of that one.” Gaz remarked.

“It’s all yours, Quill.” Jenny stated, putting her skates back on and rolling to the barrier. “She was cheating, anyway.”

“And where’s your proof?”

“What do you think?” Jenny banged the barrier for emphasis. She rolled through while Quill entered.

The shortest operative took the controller from the stand. “I wanna do a racing game. Handheld controls.”

“Fine by me.” Gaz clicked that option on her controller.

“So, what do you plan to do when all this is over? You know Mandy’s not gonna win, right? And even if she could, we’re not letting you stay. We’re bringing you in, and you’ll have to answer for your crimes.”

“I’ll cross that bridge when it comes. For now, I just wanna play games.”

“Hmph…you know, that’s what I like about Miko. When she apologizes, she tries to make things right.”

Miko glanced over at hearing this. She felt a tinge of warmth at the compliment, but returned her head to a bowing position.

A projection of a racetrack appeared. Quill’s car was black with a white streak while Gaz’s car was purple with monster fangs at the front. The cars were facing the Dueling Peaks, a mountain split into a trench with a river flowing through. “We’re gonna start at the Dueling Peaks, drive up Hateno Mountain, then down to Hateno Beach, which we’ll drive along until we reach Lurelin Village. Need a map?”

“I can manage.”

A timer counted down: three… two… one… GO! Both racers mashed the gas button and zoomed up the valley. The cars started neck-in-neck and bumped each other. As they zoomed over a short bridge, they ran through some ?-Blocks: Gaz earned a banana peel while Quill got a Boost Shroom. He seized the chance to zoom forward, driving through a Bulblin camp. Quill expertly dodged the demons’ arrows and sped alongside a river, about to enter the Dueling Peaks. Just as he passed the rim, a banana peel flew and sniped him. Quill swirled to a halt, then Gaz rammed him into the river as she zoomed past. Quill struggled to get his car out of the water and return on track.

“Hmm…aha…” Eddy smirked, his glasses shining with millions of coded characters. “Yeah… it’s not too different from Mario Kart. So, let’s see if I can help.”

Quill’s car glitched as a Gold Shroom appeared on his screen. He smirked and mashed the boost button, swiftly zooming through the canyon and turning a tight left around a horse stable. Gaz had driven over a stone bridge and dropped a bomb, but Quill steered to the very right edge and avoided the bomb’s radius. He picked up another ?-Block on the way and acquired a Red Shell. He turned right and cut through a field of dead Guardians, though some of them fired lasers at the racers. Gaz’s car was in sight, but he waited until he was past the Hateno Gate before firing the Red Shell. It homed in on Gaz’s car, but the woman shifted position behind a boulder and tricked it into crashing.

Quill growled and focused on driving up the mountain path. Gaz acquired a Frisbee power-up, and when they drove through a forest, she fired it at the trees to make them snap off and roll down. Quill had gotten a Spring Pad power-up, using it to propel himself over the rolling trees, as well as bypass some of the snaky turns. Gaz had remained but a few feet ahead of Quill. His car glitched as a Place Swap item appeared. Quill shot it at Gaz and gained the lead, just in time for them to enter Hateno Village. “So, you resorted to cheating, is that it?”

“Well, it’s not like we’re in the mood to play.” Quill stated.

Eddy inputted another command to give Quill invincibility. His car flashed rainbow colors and gained enhanced speed. He zoomed up the village without a car, flying over the top of the mountain and down the other side. Gaz hit a ?-Block and acquired the Blue Shell: she waited for Quill’s flashing to disappear, pursuing the younger racer down the mountain. Once it wore off, she fired the shell. It homed in on Quill with no intervention and struck his car, causing him to tumble down the mountain and onto the beach. Gaz sped up and rammed his car with enough force to shove him into the sea. “Sorry, kid, but cheaters never-”

Gaz gasped when flames were fired at her, taking her controller and jumping away from the terminal. Quill was mercilessly shooting his Elementors at her. “Yeah, well get burned, bitch.”

Eddy inputted another code to assume command of Quill’s car. He drove out of the sea and crossed the beach. Gaz’s focus was hindered with the flames assaulting her, but Quill would disperse the flames with ice as he left his post. He then shot wind to knock Gaz off her feet, though her hold of the controller was firm. “You really can’t take your eyes off that thing, can you?”

“No. And I don’t like being disturbed.”

“Hmph. Well, too bad.” Quill combined ice and wind to create a blizzard, causing Gaz to shudder. Her fingers quivered and caused her car to falter. She was seconds from crossing the Finish Line, but Eddy had acquired one last power-up: he fired a banana peel and caused Gaz’s car to swirl and stop, and Eddy zoomed past and crossed the Finish immediately after.

Quill lowered his weapons and allowed Gaz to stand. “Sigh…it appears I lost.” She limped back to her control station. With a few, quivering button-presses, the barrier disabled.

Eddy shot a grappler to Gaz’s leg and pulled her down. He then leapt and BASHED her in the head with his computer, causing an unbearable, dizzy, ringing sensation. Miko and the Hinobi agents approached her with weapons raised and spiteful glares.

“Where… is… Mitch?” Miko demanded.

“…He’s… in a cellar… behind a waterfall at the Lanayru Ruins. Just keep going up the hill past this shrine, through the forest… and you’ll see it.”

“…Thanks.” Miko extracted her K.O. Hammer and SMASHED her.

“COUGH! Uck…I’ll… see you… in Aincrad…” Gaz spoke her last before passing out.

“…” The friends hung their heads in silence. Even this victory left little satisfaction in their hearts. Their friends were still dead.

“…Um…thanks for helping out there.” Quill said to Eddy. “You’re a pretty cool driver.”

“Thanks…”

“…” Jenny looked over to Carmine. “Hey… I’m really sorry about what I said. I was really frustrated… but you were just trying to keep me calm.”

“I know… but I shouldn’t be calm at all. It’s my fault that Drake-”

“It was an accident. Drake wouldn’t blame you… and neither will we.”

“…” Carmine couldn’t bring herself to smile or thank her.

After cuffing Gaz and throwing her in the Infi-Cube, the team began their ascent up the elevator shaft. “…You know… I don’t think I knew Haneesh very well.” Miko admitted. “I feel like I’ve been more upset about Drake all this time… I feel awful.”

“I guess we didn’t invite you to hang out much.” Bergy figured. “But hey… even though we didn’t know Drake as well, we can still feel sad together… right?”

“Yeah…” Jenny sighed. “I hope… we don’t lose anyone else.”

The elevator reached its destination, their eyes needing to adjust to the light of the outside. “Hey! You finally made it back!” Awaiting them was Irken leader, Giz, alongside a band of Irken operatives. “What took you so long? Was my mother down there?”

“See for yourself.” Jenny said as they dumped Gaz out of the cube.

“MOTHER!” Giz gasped. “You…You look horrible! What happened to her?!”

“Just take her away.” Zahra demanded, the teams proceeding up the hill. “We got a leader to save.”

The operatives crossed the forest and entered a canyon, setting foot on the bricked path of some flooded ruins. They followed the sounds of the waterfall until it came within view. They jumped their way up some stone pillars and followed a path leading behind the waterfall. There was a hidden cave with a stairway, leading to a lonely old cellar.

Clothed in ragged prison wear, Mitch Williams lay glumly on the bench. His eyes shot open upon hearing someone entering, and he sat up with an expression of relief. “M-Miko! Five!”

“Mitch!” Five exclaimed. “Phew…were you here all this time?”

“Gaz had me moved here just recently. …Hey, is it really true? Is Haneesh… really gone?”

“Y-Yeah…” Zahra answered guiltily. “You already knew?”

“Yeah… she told me.” Mitch approached the cell door as Five had shot it open. “I…I’m sorry this happened.”

“He wasn’t the only one.” Miko said. “Drake is also gone…”

“Right… the nose-puncher. Sigh…”

They were internally surprised by Mitch’s behavior. They had almost expected some sort of snide remark or aggravating tangent about their lateness… but it seemed he knew that it wasn’t the time for it.

“At this point… I think our part in this war is done.” Five decided. “We made some mistakes and wish we could’ve done things differently… but we need to accept what happened and move on. So, let’s get off this planet. The others will take care of the rest.”

“Yeah…” Miko agreed. “Let’s go home.”

Hyrule Party Town; after the war (Play “Color Pulse” from Splatoon 2!)

Fireworks colored the night sky, and strobe lights decorated the town. The ships from Sweetopia, the Sky Gods, the Boogeys, and Nextgen Pirates were docked outside the outskirts. So many visitors had flown here, releasing and relieving all their emotions in the form of dance. Harry manned the DJ, nodding his head passionately as Off the Hook danced. Marina started the song.

“Don’t stop moving darling, Y’know there’ll be another way!”

Pearl followed, “You’ll be there in time! We’ll be there when you cry!”

“Love star, people say, Music better have your style…”

Jataro noticed E. Carmine of Sector Q, whose gas mask and attire reminded him of himself. He approached the girl and tried to greet her sheepishly, but Quill pulled her away to dance with Kodama. Miko was dancing wildly with Eddy, whose limited athleticism made it difficult to keep up with her. High Five tried to shoot him pointers, while he was dancing with Zahra. Mike Strongarm was pedaling a carriage around the town, carrying his cousin, Jenny, and Emily Garley, who relaxed in luxury as though they were royalty. Catherine was giving her niece, Cindy a shoulder ride around town, jovially raising bottles of rum in the air. Nergal, Jr. tried to follow and help restrain his eccentric sister.

News of the war’s conclusion had quickly swept the universe. The leaders of the planets were quickly amassing in a frenzy. Queen Peach and Chancellor Yorkshire shared a platform, feeling concerned by all the tension. The Hyrule platform was barren. Beside that was Queen Melia, representative of Planet Mira. Tallest Zim shared a platform with his wife, Gaz. The High President of Osiris, Secco, had a platform beside Lord Business of Legola, and King Croacus V of Flora. There were also new platforms made for New Galaxian representatives, Queen Toriel of the Underground, and Etihw and Kcalb of Planet Alternia. The Corporate Presidents For Children’s Entertainment were gathered on special platforms near the center, with their leader’s platform above them: Mom, Big Bird, Schnee, Gruntilda, and Mickey Mouse.

“Alright, alright, settle down, everyone!” Galactic Chancellor Phyronix called to everyone. “I’m sure we’ve got a lot to talk about, it’s been a stressful time for everyone, but we should all rest well knowing the war is over! And as expected, our heroic Kids Next Door have put the Emperors in their places.”

“Put them in their places?” Attention was shifted down to Jacques Schnee. “Pardon me, Supreme Chancellor, but is Hyrule’s seat not vacant? Is the Grim Glare Mandy not still occupying the throne of Hyrule that she had taken? Why would the KND simply let her be?”

“I think,” Big Bird began, “that their BIG EXCUSE is that Queen Mandy is related to the Earth KND’s Supreme Leader. Perhaps they cut some sort of deal with her. And considering the KND have already announced their selves as pirates, could we consider their two BIG CREWS one in the same?”

“Ahem, actually…” Councilman Jeremy Winkiebottom spoke up, “my daughter has clarified that the KND is retiring from the pirate business. The purpose of that scenario was to get close to the Four Emperors and form an alliance with them. In doing so, they could stop the war and persuade the pirates to work toward the greater good.”

“So, the Four Emperors will abandon their criminal ways?” Phyronix asked.

“Well… that part is a bit complicated. My daughter says they couldn’t befriend all of them, and only a fraction of the pirates may seek to change their ways. The less reputable members were sent to Zordoom. All the same, the KND have done us a valuable service, and the threat of the Emperors may be passed.”

“You say it’s passed, but I disagree.” Gruntilda said. “I sense corruption in those KND.”

“Now now, Grunty.” Mickey consoled. “This war has done harm to all of us. Why, just the idea of so many brave children risking their lives is painful on the heart. It’s hard to remember to smile with so much happening.”

“Heh heh. I suppose you’re deserving of an honorable mention, Your Majesty.” Phyronix chuckled. “Your programs and merchandise have kept billions of citizens in bright spirits.”

“Oh, that was nothing.” Mickey blushed. “I admit, I saw a good opportunity to sell some pirate merchandise.”

“Our Head President here has kept spirits up across the universe using commercials, toys, and branding of Disney heroes fighting the Four Emperors. Everyone had full confidence the war would end on a happy note! Even in this trying time, people never lost spirits!”

“Aw, shucks…”

“Can I say something?” Queen Melia spoke up. She was a girl in her late teens, with a white dress and small angel wings on her white hair. “Well… when I was in the Sky Gods’ captivity, I kept having strange dreams. I had dreams of the Disney army battling the pirates and saving countless lives. I know it sounds odd, but they kept me… hopeful.”

“OBJECTION!” Cheadle abruptly shouted. “People of the council, I allege Mickey of brainwashing! I know for a fact one of the Sky God officers was a spy of Mickey’s. He was trying to brainwash all the captives into following him, including myself and Peach!”

“N-Now, hold on a second!” yelled the king. “Sigh…it’s true that I had spies among the Four Emperors. I asked them to lend secret aid to any prisoners. Food, assurance, hope. Rescuing the prisoners would have been ideal, but far too dangerous. Even so, I never asked them to ‘brainwash’ anyone!”

“Be that as it may,” said Tallest Zim, “it seems Queen Mandy is the only Emperor still notably active while the other crews are simply running without a head. Should we make some attempt to approach her peacefully?”

“Funny you would ask that, Zim.” remarked King Croacus V. “How do you respond to the rumors that YOUR WIFE has been making secret exchanges with Mandy?!”

“Oh, I heard far more than that.” Jacques stated. “I heard from a special acquaintance that Queen Gaz was actually in league with Mandy herself! Tallest Zim, might I ask, what has your wife been doing this past month?”

Zim glanced to his wife. Gaz Membrane had a bandage around her head, still hurt from being bashed by a computer. “…Fine.” Gaz said. “I confess. Mandy sent me an invitation to join her crew… and I accepted it.”

Gasps erupted throughout the chamber. “Ho ho! Does she speak the Big Truth?!” Big Bird asked. “What say you, Tallest Zim?”

“I couldn’t really say.” Zim narrowed his eyes. “Gaz told me she was going to the Solana Galaxy for a gaming tournament… but when my son brought her home not long ago, he told me a different story.”

“Mandy and I are online rivals.” Gaz explained. “I kick both hers and Kroctus’s asses all the time in Super Smash Bros.. Mandy admired my skill enough to invite me. But I accepted under one condition: that no KND operatives would be hurt. And I tried to make sure she upheld that condition… but some operatives were killed by Mandy’s dragon.”

“You must mean Smaug.” Phyronix said. “Yes, we have heard about that…”

“After that, I had already resigned to leaving the crew… but first, I met with some operatives. I apologized for what Smaug did to their friends and allowed them to vent their rage at me. As you can see…”

“So, while you associated with Mandy,” President Linkyn of Kateenia began, “your true motive was to supervise the situation on Hyrule?”

“Yeah. Take it or leave it.”

“That’s not helping your case, dear.” Zim said.

Queen Zaádéa of Glomour spoke, “Zim, since you were supposedly unaware of your wife’s actions, what’s your approach to this situation?”

“Certainly not any of your guys’ business. Gaz is my wife, so I’ll bring her home to Wisp and decide her punishment there. Is that fine with everyone?”

“Be that as it may,” Jacques said, “even before all this occurred, your wife was still closely acquainted with Mandy.”

“Only through gaming!” Gaz stated. “It was my mission to stop them from ruling the gaming world!”

“So shows the power of the universe’s Number 3 Gamer.” Phyronix chortled. “Even the Emperors stand no chance!”

“A likely story.” Mom snorted. “What they are are close friends who exchange in underworld dealings, that’s how I see it! And they ain’t the only ones. Just swing a look at one of our new representatives, Queen Toriel!”

“M-Me?!” Toriel gasped. She was a goat woman in a purple dress.

“Isn’t it true that a chunk of the Sky God Pirates consist of people from YOUR kingdom?! Royal guards, to be precise?”

“My late husband and I wanted our people to be free, so I allowed our soldiers to become pirates, this is true. And one day, they suddenly returned with the Sky Gods and ripped out three pieces of our old kingdom to carry with them, and the citizens with. From what I’ve heard, my people have enjoyed their time flying with the pirates. That said, I do not condone all the harm the Sky Gods have done.”

“Toriel’s kingdom has always been a peaceful one.” Etihw replied in support. They had black hair and a white gown with diamond patterns, while Kcalb wore attire of black colors and white hair with black horns. “And her people are kind souls. I don’t think there’s any reason to hold anything against her.”

“Still,” Kcalb followed, “ever since our realm became more open to the outer universe, those pirates have been ecstatically reaping our resources. The Kremlings got their hands on that monstrous Moge-ko, and hundreds of Rose Quartzes were sacrificed for the sake of Sherbet’s resurrection, so we were told.”

“And speaking of the Sky Gods,” President Schnee began, “Queen Peach, I believe your daughter was last serving them, was she not? And didn’t your other daughter renounce you as well? Can we expect both Mushroom princesses to assume lives of crime?”

“And what business do you have in my family’s decisions?!”

“Because said decisions have resulted in your daughter harming innocents in the Sky Gods’ name. But I suppose that’s nothing compared to the beast in Miss Yorkshire’s belly.”

Cheadle and Peach turned utterly pale, their souls shattering. “… … …What?”

“Ooooooo!” Big Bird big cooed. “A little birdy told me that Chancellor Yorkshire had sexual relations with King K. Rool~”

The very statement sent the council in an uproar. Cheadle shared a horrified glance with Peach, who lightly shook her head so as to say, ‘It wasn’t me!’

“That is positively disgusting.” Schnee scoffed. “I thought Miss Yorkshire had at least some manner of dignity, but mating with that croc is pathet-”

“THAT’S NOT TRUE!!” Cheadle ripped the air with her voice. “That… never happened. Not at all.”

“Well, you are quite flustered about it. Are you saying you aren’t pregnant with Kroctus’s child?”

“N…No…not at all.”

“Ho hoh, right. Well, I suppose we’ll find out in nine months, or… how long are dogs usually pregnant for?”

“Trying to slander Cheadle like that is going too far!” Peach yelled. “Why are you so desperate to make us look bad?!”

“Because WE are not blind, so we’ll take the lead!” Grunty retorted. “You served the Emperors and their every need. How many here, I ask you, can be trusted? You’re slaves to villainy, ’tis what you lusted!”

“ENOUGH! Everyone, just calm down!” Mickey shouted. “This war has made us all paranoid and distrustful, mindlessly shooting blames at one-another. But this isn’t really about the Four Emperors, anymore. This is about… the Kids Next Door. Even though my company has done its part to spread hope, the KND are the true victors in the end. They have once again become the universe’s hope, so everyone will be looking to them again. They are true symbols of peace we should all be grateful for.”

“Sigh…I suppose you’re right.” Schnee sighed. “After all, my own daughter is part of the KND… it’s no wonder they would succeed.”

Cheadle grit her teeth at the president, sensing the falseness in his change of tone.

“The KND saved us not even a year ago, and they’ve saved our worlds again!” Mickey announced with pure enthusiasm. “There’s still plenty of time until the Anniversary, so I say we owe them a party with TWICE the grandeur as before! We’ll gather all the best operatives that all children from all worlds aspire to be! We’ll show everyone the true Hope of the universe in physical form! Let’s make it our mission, ladies and gentlemen of the council: TO THE KND!”

“TO THE KND!!”

…

In a private room, Zim had taken Gaz to meet with their family: their son, Giz, Gaz’s brother, Dib, and Dib’s son, Knaab. “Gaz, why wouldn’t you tell any of us you were going to Hyrule?” Dib questioned.

“You were fibbing, weren’t you?” Knaab asked. “Sectors Q and Hinobi told us that you attacked them multiple times. It didn’t sound like you were looking out for their safety.”

“Well, excuse me for not making myself look completely bad.” Gaz argued. “That would’ve made you look bad, too. That’s why I didn’t tell you.”

“Does that mean you were actually involved in illegal dealings with Mandy?” Zim asked.

“Confess, Mother!” Giz yelled. “Imperator Giz commands it!”

“Don’t talk to your mother that way!” Gaz shouted. “Fine. I teamed up with Mandy because I wanted to have fun. I wanted the thrill of being an invader.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” her husband asked. “Do you want me to be a merciless invader again?”

“No, I was just bored. But I didn’t want any kids to die, I just captured and imprisoned them. And they actually enjoyed being Mandy’s servants!”

“I can’t believe you would do something so foolhardy out of boredom.”

“If I hadn’t been there, Smaug would’ve killed even more kids.”

“But as Giz understands it, the reason those operatives died is because you tried to capture-”

“Be quiet, Giz!”

“No, Giz is right!” Dib argued. “You did this for yourself and people paid for it!”

Gaz grit her teeth in anger. Deep down, she had faith in Mandy’s promise that no one would die… and because of that, she acted carefreely in the situation. But they wouldn’t accept an excuse like that. “…You’re right. There’s nothing I can say.”

“…We’re going home.” Zim decided. “No reason to stick around here. We’ll talk about this later.”

The Tallest exited first, his son and nephew following. “…I’m disappointed in you.” Dib said to his sister. He was the next to leave. Gaz remained for a moment before joining them, her feelings repressed.

…

The operatives of Sector Hinobi met with Coruscant KND leader, Sasha Phyronix in a room that overlooked the council chamber. “Are we really not going to do anything about her?” Mitch asked. “You know she wasn’t looking out for us, she was against us!”

“I don’t even know.” Zahra answered. “She sounded really guilty about what happened… but that doesn’t excuse her actions. Even if she did protect us from Smaug…”

“I just wanna stop fighting.” Five said. “For now, her family can decide what to do with her.”

“At any rate…” Sasha began, “you guys fought bravely in the war, and we’ll never forget your sacrifice. That said… there are still some bad rumors circulating about you guys. They’re saying you only did all this to make Hinobi look good…”

“Well, those ignorant newbs can go suck on a-!”

“Mitch, please!” Bergy interrupted.

“Sigh, she’s right though.” Five sighed. “I mean… did you see the article about Hinobi?” He brought up a hologram of the article, which had an image of Hinobi’s president, Kayaba.

“I did not assign them to the Hyrule operation,” Kayaba told the press, “but I am eternally grateful for their brave contribution. Their duty went beyond fixing simple programming errors to aiding in a greater cause. Haneesh was a valuable member of our team and I couldn’t be more devastated. I vow to work harder than ever to create a game that my children will love.”

Hinobi sales had suffered a decline due to unsavory rumors, but are beginning to see a rise in demands after the heroic actions of its employees. With backing from the Corporate Presidents, Hinobi plans to build their selves greater than ever! There is a high probability that President Kayaba has been sent an invitation to join…

“I can’t tell if this is a good thing or not.” Zahra said. “It doesn’t really help our reputation any…”

“So, everyone thinks we just want to capitalize on Haneesh’s death?” Mitch inquired. “Well, not if I have anything to say about it. I’m going to start a livestream and tell everyone exactly how it went-”

“Don’t.” Bergy stated. “Just… wait it out for a while. We don’t need to prove anything.”

“But they…hmph.”

“You guys deserve a break.” Sasha said, giving a comforting smile. “Sector Six wanted to check in on you. Why don’t you spend the day with them?”

“Yeah, why not?” Five smiled. “Come on, Mitch.”

“Sigh…I suppose so. You should never record in a bad mood, anyway.”

Chapter Text

In honor of Valentine’s Day, it’s time for shipping!

GKND Bathhouse

The bathhouse of GKND H.Q. presented a marvelous view of the stars under a glass roof. Jataro Kemuri filled the tub up to his preferred height and dipped his feet in, embracing the soothing warmth. If this were like any other bath time, he would simply sit on the side until his legs were scrubbed to cleanliness. But today, all his clothes were off. This was his first time bathing since his mask came off. His friends remarked how filthy his hair smelled and demanded he bathe. In truth, the reason Jataro had never taken a full bath was because he feared his disgusting, mutant body would pollute the tub and ruin it permanently, and the filth would destroy the pipelines if it were to be washed away.

These fears still rang in his head, even as he submerged himself up to his neck. At the very least, he filled the bath up with bubbles to be able to hide himself. …It was such a refreshing feeling. He had never been enveloped in such soul-melting warmth. He felt his woes floating away with the steam… his mind and soul were becoming mist. It was like… bathing in warm, fluffy clouds… Maybe this was how they bathed in Heaven…

Jataro crawled over to the large mirror. He gazed at his own messy head. His mother always said he was hideous… he believed he was hideous… If he ever removed his mask, anyone who looked would melt, including himself. And yet, his skin wasn’t peeling, his ear holes weren’t oozing… in fact, he had ears… Jataro couldn’t tell what was so ugly… unless… Maybe one of his friends put this effeminate, human-like mask on him, and they wanted him to wash the mask. That was more likely.

He dug his long fingernails into his neck… Ow. He scraped up his neck, trying to find the mask’s rim. He couldn’t find it, and scratch marks appeared on his neck. He guessed he’d just wash the mask like this. So, he submerged himself below the bubbles. He was fully underwater, his hair flowing up like seaweed. He was gazing up at the bubbles like clouds, which reflected pretty lights and fractals on the floor of the tub. He felt his mind… floating… into slumber… This gentle world below the bubbles… embraced him…

…

…

…

…

“…cough…Cough…kuh…” The gentle feeling morphed into sickness. His vision, enveloped in darkness during that time, was reforming in a blurry way. There was… something brown and weird hanging over him. It took the form of… some kind of gas mask? Its eyes barely visible behind blue specs. “Huh…huh…” Jataro gasped as though his heart was nearly void of oxygen.

“Goodness, are you okay?” the person asked in a muffled voice. She sounded like a girl.

“…I…I…” Jataro tilted his head up. He was… “AAAAH!” Jataro rolled away and tried to curl up like a turtle. “D-D-D-Don’t look at me!!”

“It’s okay! I’ll get you a towel.” The girl got a white towel down and threw it over him.

Jataro held it like a scared little boy who just got up from a nightmare. “W-W-W-What’re you doing in here? W-Wasn’t the door closed?”

“It was, but I sensed someone drowning in here with my Haki. I came in and I found this empty bubble bath… but then I washed the bubbles aside and found you drowning! I’m glad I pulled you out in time…”

“Oh…I guess it was because I’m a Devil Fruit user. I knew we couldn’t swim, but I didn’t think I would fall asleep underwater. …Wait a minute… I recognize you from the party.”

“Oh…oh, yeah. I think I remember you. You were trying to tell me something, but I couldn’t hear you over the music. My name’s Carmine, by the way. E. Carmine.”

“I was trying to tell you ‘hi,’ but then you went to dance with your friend.”

“Eddy just pulled me away to dance with Quill and Kodama. Heh, were you going to ask me to dance?”

“Well, I was wondering… are you ugly, too?”

“Huh?” Carmine was taken aback by the question. “I…What do you mean ‘too’?”

“I just thought… you’re wearing a mask and suit kinda like what I wear. Well, it’s not really a suit, but kind of a big sweater with an artist’s apron, ’cause I need something like that to carry all my supplies. I mean, I could just use an Infi-Cube, but I don’t like the feeling of my hand being sucked into another dimension. I’m afraid of it being chomped off or getting stuck.”

“Wait, slow down, I still don’t understand. Why did you say you wear a mask?”

“Because…because I’m hideous. I’m actually wearing a mask right now. My friends put it over me. It feels fleshy and human-like.”

“Really?” Carmine walked closer and thoroughly examined his head. She noticed the scratch marks on his neck. “Um…are you sure it’s a mask? It seems like your natural head.”

“But that’s impossible. I’m supposed to be disgustingly mutated.”

“You don’t look disgusting to me. …Actually, if I didn’t already see you naked, I would’ve thought you were a girl. You’re really cute.”

“You liar. You put on that whole suit just to avoid breathing my air or touching my zombie-like flesh.”

“What on Earth are you talking about? Your skin is flawless; I was already wearing this suit to begin with!”

“Then no wonder you can’t see it. Those goggles are blurring your eyes.”

“Then I’ll just take off this mask and see for myself!” So with that, Carmine’s gloved hands gripped the gas mask and pulled it off.

Jataro’s eyes paled more than they already were. Carmine had no outer skin, only the pink underneath, and it was filled with trenches like some alien planet. Her eyelids were thin and half-closed and her teeth were exposed. She was totally bald, and two holes existed where a nose should be. Her ears were shriveled up.

“…You’re ugly…”

Hurt shone in Carmine’s eyes. She put her mask on and said, “Never mind, sorry I bothered you.” And she stomped away in a rage.

“W…Wait!” Jataro left his towel and chased her out of the bathhouse—nearby operatives looked with disgust. “Wait, I don’t understand! I’m ugly too, so I thought you would-”

“For crud’s sake, put some clothes on!”

“But I—you said my skin was-”

“It’s impolite to run around without clothes, ugly or not! Ugh, just come with me!”

Carmine dragged Jataro back to the bathroom, where he put the towel back on. “If you still don’t understand, I feel insulted. You kept calling yourself ugly and hideous all so you could get me to take off my mask, didn’t you?! You were just pulling a cruel prank!”

“But I thought you wouldn’t mind, because I’m ugly, too. Ugly people should call each other ugly, right?”

“What is the matter with you?! There is nothing ugly about you, you’re adorable!”

“A…a…a…a…adorable?” Jataro’s pale face flushed red.

Carmine internally blushed. “I mean…ugh, forget it. Look, back when I was first starting out as an operative, I was in an accident. We were infiltrating a chemical factory, and I was caught in an explosion. It ruined my flesh so bad that not even waterbenders or whatever else could fix me. My skin is sensitive to the air and almost everything else. This is a specially made suit designed to be accommodating for my skin. …But what about you? What deformities do you have?”

“I…I…I…” It should’ve been plainly obvious how hideous Jataro was… but apparently, it wasn’t.

“Well, enjoy your bath. Be careful not to drown next time.” With that, she left the bathhouse once more.

“Hmmm…” Moaning awkwardly, Jataro approached the bath.

“You need to work on that, buddy.”

“GYAAAH!” Jataro yelped and jumped away. “Wh-Who said that?! Is there a pervert in here?!”

“Down here, buddy.” Jataro faced down and spotted Vweeb.

“Oh…it’s a talking bug.”

“No, the name’s Vweeb. I was comin’ in here to take a bath when I saw Carmine run in. And as a genuine ladies’ man, calling a girl ugly ain’t cool.”

“But didn’t you see her? She looked like some kinda alien. I mean, not the aliens you see around here, but like the ones in movies. The kind that suck out your brains because they don’t wanna study for the Alien Math Test.”

Vweeb pounced onto Jataro’s shoulder. “Look, when it comes to girls, buddy, there’s only one All ’Round Rule: all girls are pretty. And the girls who are technically and physically deformed are the prettiest of all. They’re the ones who especially need to hear it. Heck, didn’t you enjoy being called ‘adorable’?”

“Oh…so, it’s not that she didn’t know I was ugly, she was just trying to compliment me because I was ugly?”

“I… guess? …I mean, the same rules work for guys, too, I reckon.”

“Oh…it’s kinda confusing, but I guess I’ll try it.”

“Just put some clothes on this time.” On Vweeb’s request, Jataro went to put his brown clothing and apron back on before leaving the bathhouse. “Sigh, there’s my good deed for the day. Now to hook up with Ari~”

Jataro ran in search of Carmine and found her in the cafeteria. “Wait!”

Carmine turned around. “What now?”

“I…I just wanted to tell you that you’re pretty.”

“You just called me ugly! You can’t take it back that quickly.”

“I know, but an alien bug made me realize that you called me adorable because I was ugly just like you, and from the prospective of ugly people, other ugly people are pretty, but when I called you ‘ugly,’ it worked in the reverse way and made you think you were pretty.”

“. . . . . .” Carmine just wasn’t sure what to make of that sentence. At all. “I just don’t understand you. Are your compliments and insults just inverted or something?”

“Do you hate me?”

“No, but I am getting kind of aggravated.”

“Well, that’s good. Ever since I was born, my mom hated me. But if parents are supposed to ‘love’ their children, then I guessed Mom’s way of raising me was her form of love. And because everyone else hated me, I guessed they were ‘loving’ me. So, you kinda ‘like’ me right now.”

“That’s…that’s just…what?! It sounded like you had a terrible mother!”

“But I still really ‘loved’ her. I ‘loved’ her so much that I used my Devil Fruit power to squish my house with my parents inside it, ’cause killing is the ultimate form of hatred, right?”

“. . . . . .” Carmine was almost regretting not letting this boy drown. “I really feel sorry for you. I just… don’t know how else to put it.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty pathetic. I wish someone would turn me into a bug and step on me.”

“…” Carmine felt obligated to help this poor boy. At least in some way. “You’re awfully pale, aren’t you? Have you ever been to the beach?”

“Yes, but I stay in the outhouse.”

“I figured. You know what, I’m taking you to Sector J. We’ll buy you some swim trunks while we’re there. What’s your name, by the way?”

“It’s Jataro Kemuri. My pirate name is ‘Ugly.’”

“We’ll have to change that, too.”

Sector J

Many operatives were joyfully running around the soothing sand or splashing in the shiny sea to relieve their selves of the stress of war. Sector W7 were playing catch with Aeincha, Melody was swimming with Manaphy, and Sector JP were playing volleyball.

Carmine and Jataro came out of the treehouse after the latter was given a swimsuit. It felt so wrong to be half-naked in public. A pair of shorts weren’t nearly enough to conceal his disgusting form. He trembled under the shadow of the treehouse, his feet cold against the beach. “Don’t stop.” Carmine said, standing in the sunlight. “Keep walking.”

“…” Jataro stepped forward. He cringed under the light. It was torture to his ugly eyes, he felt his skin sizzling. He looked down to hide his eyes from the light. His long-nailed toes were smooshed into the sand. He wiggled them as the sand shifted around. It felt like… a warm, fluffy dust. And his pale skin was now a brighter shade of pale.

“You told me you were an earthbender, right? The sand should be naturally appealing to you. It’s the gentle form of your element. Don’t just let your toes feel it; lie down and embrace it completely.”

Jataro nervously lie down on his back. Carmine did the same, Jataro tilting his head sideways. Carmine smiled behind her mask and brushed her arms and legs along, making a sand angel. Jataro mimicked her motion… and felt how the sand brushed smoothly. His entire back was becoming warm and happy. He had never felt anything like this. He brushed his limbs faster, almost digging into the sand. “Huhuhuhu! It feels like a giant, dusty blanket!”

He began to roll around and envelop himself in the sand with his bending; it morphed into a fabric-like state and grew bigger, to where only his little head was visible. Other beach-goers looked at him weirdly. “Hu hu huuu! Do people sleep in this? Because people should totally sleep in this! I feel like a cozy little butterfly in a cocoon! And since I’m not tiny, I don’t feel the fear of getting squished!”

Carmine smiled at his carefree spirit. He already looked a lot more pleasant and happy in this environment. …But she also felt jealous…

“Hu hu hu hu!” Jataro unraveled his blanket and sank his legs into the sand, using his bending to trudge through. “OW!” His toes crashed into something underneath: a buried rock. “Owwwww!” He fell on his rear and pulled up his foot to rub it. “Ow, I broke a nail! I knew there was a catch…”

“Let me see.” Carmine crouched down, seeing the middle nail bent and cracked. “Ew…you really don’t take care of yourself. Luckily, bombs aren’t the only things I carry.” She withdrew a pair of clippers. She gently took Jataro’s foot and clipped the bad nail. She then proceeded to clip the others with careful precision, then she moved to the hands.

Jataro, meanwhile, mentally questioned how anyone could look at and handle his nails without vomiting. But with this girl, it stopped feeling strange. After all, she was ugly, too. The fabric of her suit was rough and unpleasant… even though he was still warmed by the gesture. “There we go. Your nails are fresh and ready to grow again.”

The pain in the toenail faded away peacefully. He studied his fingers and toes thoroughly. The nails were neatly trimmed. They were as small and round as a newborn’s. “Just because I can’t be pretty, I would still like other people to be pretty. I took cosmetology lessons from Aeincha, but I can only do basics. My Observation Haki helps with that, too. I try to learn as many helpful skills as I can, since I can never be strong or as nimble as everyone else. But you don’t have those weaknesses, it seems like. With a healthy diet, enough sunlight or exercise, you can live a happy life. I mean, you can’t rule out personal drama with friends or enemies, but as long as you can let your body be happy, you’ll live happily.”

“My… body…” Never has Jataro been proud of his body. He grew up believing he was disgusting, and that’s all he had ever known. He couldn’t even look himself in a mirror. And when he finally did, he thought it was merely an illusion. A skin suit. The sun was shining on his pale form, as if smiling.

“Man-Manaaaaaaa!” They heard an animal-like cry out at sea and looked. Manaphy was speeding like a dolphin, Melody matching his pace. “Faster, Melody, fasteeeerrr!”

“Oh!” Carmine gasped. “I just got a great idea! Hey, use your earthbending to call them over, their names are Melody and Manaphy!”

“Actually, I can do this.” Jataro snapped a picture with his energy camera, then dug his face in the picture. It appeared enlarged as it faced the sea. “HEY! MELODY, MANAPHY, COME OVER HERE!”

“AAAAAH!” Manaphy screamed and swam out to sea. “Manaphy, wait!” Melody chased.

In a few minutes, Melody was able to console her uncle and bring him back to shore. “Jataro, Manaphy has the power to switch peoples’ bodies. I would like him to switch our bodies.”

“S…Switch our… bodies?” Jataro stuttered. “You mean I would be a… girl?”

“Well, yes, but I think we should understand how each other feels. If you were in my awful body, you would feel more pride in your body. And I… well, I don’t know how I would feel. I mean… it’s been so long since I…”

“I guess we could try… and I promise not to look at your ‘no-no’ parts. I would ask you to do the same, but you already-”

“Please don’t finish that.” Melody requested. “Well, Manaphy, switch away.”

“Okay. Phyyyyy!” Red lines connected the two. Jataro’s soul traveled into Carmine’s body, and Carmine’s soul entered Jataro’s.

The feelings that resulted came in extreme shock. “Aaaaahhh!” Jataro, crying in Carmine’s voice, fell to her knees. He was instantly cut off from the outside air, breathing a musty, filtered scent. The suit was clasping his body in a harsh fashion. His skin was wriggling unpleasantly. “I…I feel like… I’m suffocating… Carmine, you…?”

Carmine was too distracted to notice. She felt… incredibly light. She was looking at arms… bare, pale arms. She could wave them around and feel salty air brush them. The sea mist tickled her, but the shield of skin helped it feel pleasant instead of painful. She had a flat, smooth chest, a little hole in the belly, and her feet were relaxed in the sand. These traits… she remembered having these traits a long time ago. Memories came washing back into her. Air was entering her lungs. Unfiltered, fresh, salty air. On instinct, she remembered how a nose works and took a big whiff. The spray tickled her nosehairs—she had nosehairs!

“I feel…I feel like… I’ve been reborn. I feel… new… I…I…”

Carmine ran. She ran with a speed she had long forgotten. She ran with a speed even Jataro never managed. It was the average speed of any 12-year-old boy, but Jataro had never felt the adrenaline or passion to run that fast. Carmine was free. Her feet were free to the sand, body was free to the wind, mouth was free to air. She kept her mouth open and pumped it with all the air she could. She felt Jataro’s heart pumping passionately, felt it throbbing in his chest. She just wanted to run and run and never go back.

“Hey! Come back, Carmine!” Jataro tried to chase, but Carmine’s suit was too bulky and heavy. “D’oooohh! This stupid…” He fiddled around and pulled off Carmine’s mask, then tore off her boots, exposing her pink, shriveled, jelly-like feet. “OW OW AAAH!” He tripped as though stepping on a scalding hot grill. His head hit the sand—“AAAH! Ow, it hurts, it hurts! Ow, ow, it’s stuck in my flesh! Am I bleeding?! Ohhhh…!”

Melody hastened to put Carmine’s gear back on, then she lifted Jataro and carried him quickly.

Carmine had sadly reached the end of the beach. “Yah!” She yelped when waves brushed the shore, chilling her feet. “?!” She looked to the ocean. The vast, beautiful ocean. The endless world. The sea that Melody loved, the sea that Sheila loved; several operatives could compete for who loved the sea the most. Oh, how Carmine wanted to be in that contest!! “OHHHHH!” Crying haplessly, she ran into the waters. She splash-splash-splashed with each step, grew excited in its chilly, tickly feel, as if she were an obsessive lover who just wanted to be with her mate. Her body sank further, and she let herself fall. “Don’t leave me! Don’t ever leave me! I don’t wanna go back, I don’t wanna!!! I don’t—gu-u-u-u-u-r-r-r-r-gle…”

When she was completely submerged, her weight increased tenfold. Heavier than even her suit. She was powerless in the ocean’s grip. The sea was filling her lungs and would take her soul…

…

Manaphy swiftly pulled Carmine out of the sea with Melody’s order. When Jataro came in range, red lines connected them, and they swapped back. Melody bent the water out of Jataro’s lungs, and both kids felt rather dizzy after the sudden change back.

“Please trade me back!” Carmine begged, unable to mold tears in her dry eyes. “Please! I hate this body! I don’t wanna wear this suit any more! I wanna feel the air, feel the sand! I wanna take baths, I wanna eat big meals! I don’t wanna live like thi-i-i-i-iiis…”

She fell, bowing and crying. Jataro… never imagined a fellow human being looking so pathetic. No one except himself. He thought only rats and bugs were beneath him. He never had to look down on a fellow human on equal ground.

When Carmine glanced up, she saw Jataro’s cute feet standing in their own shadow. She moved up his stick legs, frail belly, and reached the sweet eyes on his adorable head. His tiny smile looked so sweet. “You’re not ugly…”

His hand lowered, opening its newly trimmed fingers. …Carmine gripped the hand in her thick, harsh glove, unable to tell how tightly she was holding it. She allowed Jataro to pull her up. “…Hey, Melody? Can Manaphy switch our bodies permanently?”

“What?” Melody was thrown back by Jataro’s request, as were the others.

“Carmine deserves this beautiful body more than I do. She deserves to be beautiful on both the inside and the outside…”

“You just… contradicted yourself.” The waterbender sighed and face-palmed.

“It’s okay…” Carmine smiled. “I am ugly… not just the outside, but I…I did something terrible.”

“Oh…I know what you mean.” Jataro replied. When they had been switched just now, Jataro got a glimpse at her memories. He saw the battle leading up to Drake’s death… and why Carmine feels responsible.

“They…” Carmine began crying again. “They said they weren’t mad at me… that it wasn’t my fault… but I… They’re just holding it in…”

Jataro softly hugged her suit. “Manaphy, please switch our bodies. She doesn’t deserve to feel any more pain…”

“Well, if Manaphy stayed far away from you, you would be switched indefinitely.” Melody remembered. “But I don’t think that’s the right choice.”

“Don’t worry.” Carmine said. “Jataro…” She grabbed her mask and slowly pulled it off, exposing her stressed pink eyes to his pretty, pale ones. “I know you’ve made mistakes, too. I feel… happier… now…”

Jataro gave a little smile. Carmine began to pull off her gloves. She gently held Jataro’s hands… and trembled a bit. She tried to hide her weakness… wanting to remember the warmth of a fellow human. Then, she leaned her head toward his chest cautiously. Jataro felt her shaking, and her skin felt icky… but he didn’t mind at all. Deep down, they both felt warm…

“…” Jataro puckered his lips and very softly kissed her scalp. She flinched a bit… but she smiled. Carmine raised her head and placed her lipless teeth to Jataro’s cheek. She couldn’t make the suckle… but he felt the tickle. When she pulled away, Jataro folded his hands and smooshed his chest with his arms, swaying and blushing like dorky boys do when they get their first kiss.

Melody smiled. You never knew what the day would throw at you in this business, but the happier surprises were extremely rare and wanted. “I can have Manaphy change you back for a short time, at least.”

“Maybe later…” Carmine replied, putting her gear back on. “Let’s just spend the day together normally for now.” They walked away, holding hands.

Melody shared a knowing glance with Manaphy: they knew this wasn’t the last time they’d be swapping bodies.

Jataro would lay in the sand, belly and back up, until his body would absorb every ounce of sunlight he missed out on. Carmine would ask him to put on sunscreen before it could become too brown, but when Jataro would greet his friends again, his skin would be newly crisped and colored to a darkish-peach. On some days, they would go to Melody and ask for a Heart Swap. They would go to buffets so Carmine could stuff Jataro’s body with all the food she ever wanted to eat. They would go to playgrounds and explore forests and mountains; Carmine wanted to know all the amazing things her body was missing out on. Of course, she would apologize for putting Jataro through more pain, but he was only happy to see her happy.

For the longest time, their souls just felt so confined to their own bodies, for different reasons, but now body and soul were free. Their hearts were aflutter. Whatever challenge would come next, they would run forward with utmost confidence.

They made sure the KND would record him as ‘Kemuri the Cutie.’

Coincidentally, I caught an illness as I was finishing this chapter. Lol whenever I feel sick, I usually write a one-shot relating to sickness, such as “Healing” and “Headache,” and Carmine’s condition really applies to me in this case because I just feel so sensitive and weak. Funny how this worked out. XD

Chapter Text

Augmented
Illusion
Now
Causing
Reality
Altering
Disaster

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As a sea of code splayed before the user’s vision, a pair of rings rotated within their U.I.. Within the center of those rings appeared a castle of incomparable size, 100 floors tall and all the width of valleys. “Welcome to Aincrad, the land where dreams become reality. No matter your race, gender, or identity, Aincrad is a world where you can be anything you please. Avatars are made with millions of customization options. Have humans ever wished to be mermaids? Have mermaids ever wished to be humans? You can become whatever race you wish, with sizes ranging from three inches to 30 feet, and master whatever skill you wish. The virtual reality enables one to grasp any number of skills, ranging from cooking, fishing, marksmanship, and everyone’s favorite, combat. By automatically assisting your muscles in performance, Aincrad is designed to improve one’s muscle memory as they perfect their skills in the real world.”

The screen switched to an image of Akihiko Kayaba, the President of Hinobi, who had gray hair and a labcoat. “Hinobi has dedicated its heart and soul to creating this game where everyone can be equal. We have worked tirelessly to rid the game of any and all errors. After only four days since publication, we have sold billions of NerveGear setups to customers all across the cosmos. My staff have interviewed a number of customers who express delight with the software.”

The screen showed a chubby Glomourian boy with glasses. “I’m not good at using swords like my friends, but in Aincrad, I think I’m really good at it! I get to look all cool, and it feels so real! Huhu, I like it!”

A Goomba woman was shown next. “I gave myself a body with long, springy arms, and it feels so amazing! I always thought using arms would be difficult, but it comes so natural to me, I don’t wanna stop!”

A yellow-haired Harnitan girl said in an average, shy voice, “My friend is a KND operative who lost her arms in the Pirate War, and um, she never stopped crying, but she says Aincrad makes her happy, and she never wants to leave.”

“Indeed, Aincrad is able to accommodate people with any disability. We have NerveGear varieties designed to suit people with sensitive skin, tubes for people who need assisted breathing, and other types. By activating the NerveGear, your consciousness will be transmitted to the Aincrad Cloud, where you can meet, befriend, or challenge players from the universe over. Your real body will fall into a sleep-like state. It is therefore advised you play in a safe environment, and please take regular breaks to give your real body some exercise.”

The screen cut to an image of several people in hospitals. “But of course, I’m sure many are still burdened by the most recent incident. The NerveGear is designed to read the brainwaves of our unwaking victims and replicate their memories in the form of artificial avatars. If these avatars closely portray the original people, they can safely be reuploaded into their slumbering bodies. Some of our patients are in hospitals, but the process can easily be carried out in the safety of your homes. We humbly hope you enjoy Aincrad. Oh, yes… this product is also sponsored by Disney.” Disney’s logo appeared beside him.

Miko Kubota had been with Sector Q for almost nine months. The 16-year-old was distinct with her violet hair, yellow T-shirt with a winking black cat, and purple pants. She appeared Japanese-American, but she actually came from Coruscant, having been transferred to Earth as part of Hinobi’s plan to branch out to other worlds.

“So, how’s Aincrad working out so far?” Miko asked via a phone call.

“It seems to be working out, but I wouldn’t hold my breath.” replied High Five, Miko’s best friend from home. “I gotta admit, it’s pretty impressive. Did you get your free copy?”

“I did, but…” Miko frowned and looked away. In the past, she would’ve killed for this kind of game. Even knowing of Hinobi’s glitch problem, she would have stayed loyal to them and played their games to death. But that was before their glitches had caused so much trouble for her new friends. “I mean, my friends don’t really trust it… and neither do I.”

“Heh, I guess you’re kind of done with Hinobi, huh?” Five asked with a mild smile.

“I mean, it hasn’t exactly been the same, anymore.”

“Yeah, us too. They kind of used Haneesh’s death to boost their fame. And most of the glitch business was covered up by Galactic News, anyway.”

“Tell me about it…” Miko mumbled with a somber look. If the recent incident weren’t bad enough, she had already lost two friends during the Pirate War: one of her old teammates, Haneesh, and her new Sector Leader, Drake Puncture. The team had been able to build their motivation back up during the Cooking Festival, but the Dream World incident that happened right after put their motivation right back down. Quill’s father had been a victim of it.

“Um, but I have some good news! I… have a girlfriend now!”

“Really?” Miko perked up, beaming. “Well, who’s the lucky lady??”

“It’s Zahra!”

“Hah! I always knew she had the hots for you!”

“Heheh! We haven’t done anything too fancy, yet, but we’re hoping things settle down with all these… well, crises. Anyway, I have to meet my team at a dungeon soon. Catch ya later?”

“Same cat time, same cat channel.” Miko winked like the cat on her shirt.

“Heh heh!” With that, Five hung up.

“Hey, Meeks!” Miko turned as Eddy Flores took his spot on the couch beside her, holding his Nintendo NX. At 13 years, Eddy was a scrawny boy with round techy glasses, messy brown hair, a pale-blue T-shirt, similar socks, and black shorts. “Care to join me in Splatoon? Splatfest is starting up, and I’m getting wrecked by the Gilligans.”

“Sure, I’ll lend ya a hand!”

Miko grabbed her own controller and excitedly hooked up. Eddy was Miko’s gamer buddy since joining this sector, and though they didn’t get off to a good start, they have since enjoyed each other’s company. Often, they would find their selves up late at night and gaming online.

The sound of roller-blades rumbling along the floor resounded as Jenny Strongarm came sliding in. “So, what do you couch potatoes wanna do today?” she asked spryly. She had messy brown hair under her white and dark-yellow biker helmet. She had a dark-yellow T-shirt, white shorts, and roller-blades of the same colors.

“Right what you see.” Eddy remarked.

“Come on, aren’t your butts tired by now?”

“Why are you so energetic?” asked the voice of Quill Ramsey. The 3’8” Sector Leader walked out to greet them. He wore a black shirt, white shorts with matching shoes, and his black hair was up in three spikes shaped like racecar engines. He had been rather strict after being appointed as leader, and today seemed no different. “Just because no one you know is in a coma…”

“Whoa, excuse me.” Jenny replied. “Like, I feel for you, dude, really. But there ain’t anything we can do about it, right?”

“Hmm…” Quill approached Miko and Eddy. “Hey, Miko… have you tested it, yet? Aincrad, I mean?”

“Er…not really. I thought we were all in agreement, we shouldn’t trust it?”

“I know, but… I mean… it sounds like it’s been getting some good reviews. I heard some saying that some of the patients are starting to come to…”

“Those could easily be lies, you know.” Eddy replied. “People get paid to spread misinformation.”

“Like you would know! All you do is play Nintendo!”

“I play other companies, sometimes. Besides, I listen to KNN, and that’s the only news I trust. Just listen.” He grabbed the remote and flipped the channel to Melody Jackson and Yuta Asahina.

Melody spoke first, “With Aincrad seeing a rise in popularity, the KND is receiving its own cut of the pie. Shipments of VR setups have been sent by the Coruscanti KND for any who would like to try it out… with caution, of course. Supreme Leader Cheren would like everyone to be reminded of the incidents reported back in August, in which operative lives were threatened by Hinobi’s faulty hardware.”

“We were almost thinking of banning the game entirely!” Yuta grinned. “But Cheren wanted to give his operatives a fair choice. If you believe the game can save your comatose loved one, that choice is up to you. Or even if you just think it looks fun! I dunno, I can go for it. What about you, Mel?”

“Leave my body stiff and defenseless while I go blind from mass RGB? No thanks.”

“You can trust me to protect you!”

“Oh, no you don’t!” Yuta faced the camera as it seemed to be running toward him. Eric’s voice shouted, “I know what you’re trying, you little—!”

“Hey!” Yuta screamed as he appeared to be getting beat up, the camera shaking wildly.

It was then pulled away by Klubba and pointed at the Kremling’s puny head. “We will be back after these commercial messages!”

“See?” Eddy asked. “And don’t you remember being shrunk and confined to a toy car because of their VR?”

“Of course I do! But I…I can’t take it, anymore.” Quill sighed. “I just want my dad to wake up… and wake up soon.”

“Okay, why don’t we stop fighting?” a muffled girl’s voice spoke.

E. Carmine was the most distinct of her teammates: the girl was confined to a brown contamination suit and gas mask. Her flesh had been destroyed during a mission, making her extremely sensitive to almost anything. “Even if you don’t think the game will work, there’s a lot of other people putting their faith in it. So… let’s just see how it works out. Can we do that?”

“…” Quill hung his head. “Sigh…but how long will it take?”

He didn’t bother to wait for an answer before going to the kitchen. “And how could you say that, anyway?!” Jenny shouted. “Like, I’m still upset about Drake, so excuse me for trying to liven things up!”

“Alright, alright. I’m sorry…”

Jenny sighed. “Why’s everything gotta be so depressing now?”

“The older you get, the more complicated everything is.” Eddy remarked, still focused on the Splatfest. “The world used to revolve around a magical star child, but now we got demons and criminal warlords, alien councils and corrupt governments, and no one bothers to sit down and enjoy a normal life. Gah, dammit, Artie!”

“Normal as we get, I guess.” Miko chuckled. It was then she received a phone call, the caller ID reading that it was her mother. “Hey, Mom?”

“Hi, sweetheart. Um, you know that new game helmet thing that came from Hinobi?”

“Uh…you mean the NerveGear? For Aincrad?”

“Yes… did you tell Lexi it was okay to use it?”

“W-What? She never asked me… LEXI!” In a slight fury, Miko abandoned the couch and zoomed out of the treehouse.

“And she’s abandoned me.” Eddy sighed. “#$@%* dudes be #$@%* sleepin’ indeed.”

Quill opened the refrigerator and got some milk in a glass bottle, taking a drink. “Hmmm…” He thought back to the Sector Leader meeting he recently attended.

“And those Guardians… are in YOUR sectors!” Index pointed to the various leaders, including Quill.

Quill reached into his pocket and withdrew a small Pokéball. It was dark-blue with unlit black lines. “…If she becomes a Guardian, things will get way more crazy for us. And this Hinobi thing definitely has something to do with it.” There were too many incidents happening one after the other. They seemed unrelated, and yet they weren’t. They may have all been coincidence, but they all revolved around the Newborn. With Miko in their team, they were bound to be roped into her destiny. Quill sighed. “If Drake were here… he would want us to help her. Hmph…then I might as well scout it out.”

Kubota Household

Lexi Kubota, the 12-year-old sister of Miko, wore a karate robe and black hair in a ponytail. Having been curious about Aincrad, she fixed the NerveGear on herself and rested on her bed. Based on the instructions, she declared, “Link Start.”

Her room, the world, and the universe around her disappeared. The karate student found herself in a vast space of floating white blocks. One of these blocks flew before her with a screen. It seemed to have avatar customizations. “I can be anything I wanna be, huh? In that case… I always wanted to be… A DRAGON!”

Lexi gave herself a black tail with orange spinal spikes, horns, sharp teeth, wings, and pointed ears. Her feet and hands became claws, but she regained her human skin. “Or a Draconian! I like it! I can even give myself an element, too? Hmmm…I’ll take lightning. And my username? I’ll stick with Samurai Lex.”

Once she had completed her settings, Lexi was slurped away by a beam of light. “Samurai Lex… welcome to Aincrad. Your adventure begins in the Land of Beginnings.”

Soft grass was felt beneath her feet as a fantastical world splayed before her: there were numerous islands suspended in the air via thin stems connected to the ground. Some islands had ponds, grasslands, forests, or towns, as well as small moons or suns. A waterfall poured from one island onto another and created a rainbow. There was a tremendous pillar in the center of the valley. At first, Lexi thought she was alone, until thousands of other creatures materialized around her. Did they happen to log in at the same time, or did they only load in from her perspective? It was probably the latter, since some appeared to be exploring without much confusion.

A pair of eyes displayed on a screen on her U.I.. “At Aincrad, players are encouraged to develop their skills and explore as they please. The central elevator will take players to any floor of their choosing. Each floor has its own collection of enemies for those who wish to hone combat skills, but be mindful that enemies are stronger on higher floors. If your HP drops to zero, you will be automatically booted out of the game for 10 minutes. Each floor also has a Boss Guardian in a hidden location. According to an ancient Aincrad prophecy, should the 100 bosses fall, the path to the Lost World will open. Currently, no bosses have fallen, so it is unconfirmed if the prophecy is true.”

“I mean, the game just came out.” Lexi shrugged. “Then again, Miko has told me of some crazy good speedrunners. ’Guess I better get exploring! Um…” She glanced back to her wings. “Problem is, I don’t really know how to fly. Maybe like…oh!” She was able to get in touch with the nerves of her new wings and flap them. She carefully lifted off the ground and leaned her body forward. “Hey… flying is pretty easy!”

“The NerveGear is designed to help people adjust to the physical attributes of their chosen race. However, be mindful that flight is limited in certain areas.”

“Yeah, yeah. Man, this place looks wild! I can’t believe Miko didn’t wanna play this!”

Lexi skimmed the valley below and around, seeing various groups of players in many different avatars exploring the fields and fighting monsters. “…Wait, is that Sayu?!” Lexi spotted a giant pink mermaid flying over an island platform, using a bubble inner-tube. It seemed that three other players were riding Sayu. “Even she’s in this game! This is so cool!”

Lexi flew toward the Elevator Tower, surrounded by the bustling Town of Beginnings. “Yeeeaaah, yeeeaaaah!” There was raving taking place as two people were battling in an open area of the street. One of them seemed to be a Mobian rabbit with white, jagged fur, a red jacket, and fingerless combat gloves with metal knuckles. The other was a handsome young man with shining silver armor. The human shot flashes of lightbending, the rabbit shutting its eyes as it dealt spinning kicks.

Lexi saw a trio of boys on a roof: Rez, a tall one with yellow armor; Francis, a glasses boy with blue armor; and Arnold, a sunglasses boy with red armor (all from Spy Kids). She landed beside them. “Hey, what’s going on? Did those two get in a fight?”

“What, you don’t know who they are?” Francis chortled.

“Uh, no? I just logged in, excuse me.”

“The rabbit is King Kazma.” Arnold pointed. “And the silver guy is with us. He’s The Guy.”

“The… Guy?”

“Yeah.” Rez nodded coolly. “The Guy. He’s the Number 2 gamer in the universe. Of course, since the Number 1 gamer died, he might as well take the spot. And guess what? He’s with us.”

“But Kazma is no pushover.” Francis replied. “He uses that same avatar as his profile for all his games, so everyone knows who he is. Smash, Hero’s Duty, he kicks butt. But he’s not The Guy.”

Kazma (from Summer Wars) tackled The Guy to the ground. He shut his eyes from the blinding flash attack, then sank his teeth into The Guy’s chest. His HP rapidly dropped, but The Guy channeled chi to his chest and fired a beam of light. Kazma flew off, and The Guy drew a light sword to slice the rabbit’s stomach. Kazma panted on the ground, his HP reduced to 2. “You can’t survive another hit.” The Guy said. “I’d advise you to back down, if you don’t want to suffer 10 minutes of boredom.”

The rabbit grit his teeth and stood up. “Finish me off or suck it, shiny bastard!” He threw a punch, ducked down-right to dodge Guy’s attack, then swung a kick at the legs, but Guy jumped and dealt the last blow. King Kazma derezzed as the crowd cheered for the silver gamer.

…

In the real world, a tan-skinned boy with short black hair, orange tank-top, and baggy white shorts sat up and took off his NerveGear. He was thin, had a bang over his right eye, and his room was rather dim. “Jerk.” The boy decided to play on his computer for the next 10 minutes.

Back in Aincrad, The Guy leapt up to join Arnold, Francis, and Rez. “That’s our Guy!” Arnold said, sharing a knuckle-punch with his leader.

“Hey, who’s this lovely lady?” The Guy noticed the Draconian.

“Oh, me?” Lexi blushed. “I’m… Samurai Lex! I’m sort of a newbie.”

“Thought so.” Arnold said.

“Yeah, well I’m no slouch at karate!”

“Yeah, well we’re planning to open the Lost World.” Rez said. “We got our eyes on the 100 bosses, and we’re gonna take ’em all.”

“What’s in the Lost World, anyway?”

“Who knows?” Arnold shrugged. “A billion dollars… unlimited power… all we know is, nothing can beat The Guy. And the only gamer that could,” he fist-palmed, “is already crushed.”

“C’mon, Arnold, that’s not nice.” Guy said. “Chiaki didn’t deserve what happened to her.”

“Who’s Chiaki?” Lexi asked.

“She was the Number One gamer.” Francis answered. “But a few years ago, her hometown was ravaged by pirates. Apparently, she was crushed by falling debris. Because of that, she holds the permanent Number One spot out of honor.”

“An honor she deserves and more.” Guy said nobly. “Well, since you’re already acquainted, care to join us for a little quest? If you’re new at this game, we can help hone your skills.”

Lexi beamed. “That sounds…!” But her body immediately began glitching and fizzing out. She derezzed in an instant, and the word ‘Disconnected’ displayed.

“Huh…bad Wi-Fi?” Arnold wondered.

…

“AAAAH!” Lexi screamed and awoke in her room, as if being forced out of a good dream. “MIKO! You ruined my epic adventure!”

Her sister was standing over her with the helmet raised aloft, looking reprovingly. “Lexi, why did you take my NerveGear?”

“You didn’t wanna play with it!”

“Because I don’t know if it’s safe, yet! You know Hinobi’s games glitch!”

“Yeah, but you always fix things. It sounds like a lot of people really like it, and it could probably boost my karate level.”

“Come on, sis, you’re already great at karate. You’ve already got Maddy teaching you, right? I mean, why not just join the KND if you wanna get better?”

“The KND sounds too dangerous. But this way, I can go on epic quests without worrying about that. Please, Miko?”

“Sigh…” Miko dropped the NerveGear back in Lexi’s hands. “But if things start to get glitchy, promise you’ll take it off.”

“I will! Thanks!” Lexi put it back on and plopped back on her bed.

Miko moaned in frustration before turning to leave. “Hmm…maybe I should at least check it out. If things do get glitchy, then I’m one of the best people to handle it, right?” She smiled at herself, but self-doubt was clear in her eyes and tone. “…But I guess I’ll need to get another one now.”

Assassination Classroom

Somewhere in a forest lay an abandoned wood building that once served as a classroom. Four students occupied the only desks: one was Killua Zoldyck, a white-haired half-Sheikah with a light-purple T-shirt, pale-purple shorts, and purple shoes. His little brother, Kalluto, had shoulder-length black hair, wore a black kimono with white and violet edges, with red flowers on them, and Japanese sandals. There was a girl with short, silver hair, an open black jacket, and tall green boots. Her belly was heavily exposed between her short green top and short, white shorts. The last girl had dark-green hair in long pigtails, red eyes, a red school uniform with a black skirt, and long red socks.

Killua had his feet disrespectfully propped on his desk. The red-eyed girl, Maki (from Danganronpa) had one leg bent up and propped on her chair. The silver-haired girl, Fie (from Trails of Cold Steel) had her head rested on her folded arms. These were typical demeanors of any bored student in any boring class. Although this classroom only served as a meeting place; it certainly wasn’t the setting for their lessons.

Deathstroke, Shadow the Hedgehog, Deadpool, and Akame marched into the classroom, holding four total boxes. “Now, listen here, you brats.” Deathstroke greeted. “We’ve got some presents for you. I’m sure you’re familiar with the hot new game sweeping off the shelves. Well, we pitched in and purchased four NerveGear setups just for you!”

“You mean Aincrad?” asked Maki. “That virtual reality game?”

“Why are you giving us a videogame?” Fie asked.

“Because your teachers are going to be busy with some important research. We’d hate for you to fall behind on your training, so we’ve got an assignment for you.”

“In Aincrad, players are encouraged to hone their skills by challenging each other in combat.” Shadow explained. “So, your assignment is simple: search for the most skilled players in Aincrad and eliminate them. Report back with your chosen targets and thought process as you executed your plan.”

“Don’t we have to accept paid work before we target anyone?” Maki asked.

“Killing the players’ avatars won’t kill them in real life.” Akame said. “That’s why players challenge and kill each other without mercy. This assignment is primarily to hone your skills while we’re away.”

“Man, this is lame.” Killua whined. “I don’t need any more training, I took on a frickin’ Yonko. Can’t we just play Among Us?”

“I dunno.” Fie replied. “Maki makes a mean impostor.”

“I know how to set up a good mystery.” Maki said.

“If you’re not going to take it seriously,” Kalluto replied, “then perhaps be thankful our teachers are allowing us to play a game for an assignment. In which case, I plan to kill more than any of you.”

“That’s mah girl!” Deadpool slid up and put an arm around Kalluto. “You show these newbies who means business!”

“I’m a boy, Master.”

“YAH!” Deadpool jumped away. “I’m sorry! Please don’t hate me on social media! Don’t ban me from bathrooms!”

“Shut up, Master.”

“Yes, sir.” Deadpool bowed.

“My friend actually has this game.” Fie said as she used a dagger to cut open her box. “She really talks it up, so I’ve been thinking about getting it myself.”

“Hmm…I wonder if Nagisa has it.” Killua thought aloud.

“Perhaps he does?” Slade cocked a brow. “If so, you ought to invite him to join you.”

“And what?” Killua smirked. “He ain’t gonna go with your plans. And neither will I.”

“Yeah, well we’re still being paid to teach you, and you won’t see the end of it from your parents if we write a bad report!”

“Whatever, old man. A free game is a free game.”

“So, how long will this be, anyway?” Maki asked.

“We’ll return in about a week.” Akame answered. “You’ll do good, Maki.” she said with a smile.

“Don’t fall behind them, Fie.” Shadow stated.

“Same to you, boss.”

Shadow warped his fellow agents away with Chaos Control. The four apprentices exited the school and traveled down the path. “You guys wanna crash at my place and do this?” Killua asked.

“Sounds cool.” Fie answered, a hint of perkiness to her stiff tone. “But I’m probably gonna hook up with Millium.”

“I don’t like sleeping under the same roof as your older brothers.” Maki inputted.

“They won’t bother us if they know what’s good for them.” Kalluto’s eyes darkened.

“I’m gonna send a call to Nagisa.” Killua said, pulling out his phone. “I think he wanted to get the game to help his mom, but he could always try it out himself.”

“Maybe we could all hang out together.” Fie wondered. “I’d like to meet Nagisa.”

“Yeah, he’s a pretty cool dude, though I don’t know if he’d like having more girl friends.”

“I think I’ll just be acting independently.” Kalluto said. “I don’t much care for your friends.”

“Yeah, we don’t like you either.”

“I’d rather be on my own, too.” Maki said. “Assuming that idiot doesn’t decide to buy the game.”

“Yoohooooo! Maki Rooooooll!” After turning the corner of some trees, they spotted a small rocketship. A man in a purple jacket and goatee stuck his head out. “Is class already over? Great timing! You guys wanna grab a bite to eat?”

“I call shotgun!” Killua ran over. Fie was quick to follow as she performed a great leap.

“Ugh…that idiot.” Maki blushed.

Aincrad; Dragon Towers

“HYAH! HWAH!” Carol Masterson had given herself Chinese hair buns, a white martial arts robe with green edges and “$” signs, and open-toed shoes. She made herself six feet tall with a rather sturdy build, exchanging kicks with a red-goggled frog girl with orange hair. The frog, Oracle, performed jumps to dodge Carol’s kicks and thrusted airborne kicks at her in turn. Carol dodged behind and dealt quick jabs to Oracle’s back, but Oracle reached back, grabbed her, and hopped all the way against the ceiling to smash Carol. They dropped down as Carol crashed on the floor, Oracle leaping to stomp her, but Carol rolled aside and dealt a punch up at Oracle.

The Dragon Towers, located on Floor 13, were a city of Chinese towers with snaky dragon roads wrapping the buildings. The main focus here was combat games, ranging from wrestling, boxing, or just no-holds beat ’em up.

“HO yeah!” Carol fist-pumped. “I feel so much more versatile in this world!” She kicked her leg back and front. “When I get back to the real world, I bet I’ll be even faster!”

“You would be if you ditched the dress shoes.” Dillon remarked. He had given himself the form of a Twili with a black toga.

“It’s a great way to blow off some steam after that mess in the Dream World.” Oracle said. “And I’m getting the same amount of exercise!”

“Hey, you guys wanna know somethin’?” Carol asked. “I’m sort of in the process of developing a game of my own~. In a few years, you may get to see it.”

“Is it gonna top this one?” Dillon asked.

“Oh, it’s gonna be good, trust me~”

“Say, Carol, you think you can help with something? Vanellope’s been trying to hack into her own NerveGear and join us, but she’s having a hard time.”

“It must be pretty tight code. Well, I was gonna wake up and get some food, anyway, so maybe I’ll stop over.”

“Sure, we’d like that!”

“Okay! Logging out now!” Carol brought up her holo-screen and clicked the Log Out. Her avatar vanished.

Dillon and Oracle were approached by a gray-skinned boy with alien tech armor, round headwear, and darker-gray markings. “Hey, gang! Guess who I am!”

“Raleigh?” Dillon vaguely recognized the voice. “What’s your race?”

“I’m a Machina, a kind of robotic race from Mira! Now I feel one with machines!”

“Heh, nice.”

“So, do you know if Haylee’s gonna get the game? What do you think she’ll pick?”

“The Gilligans aren’t really thinking of getting it.”

“Really? I thought Artie would at least like a crack at Gun Gale.”

“What’s Gun Gale?”

“The shooting game on Floor 23.” Oracle brought up a digital screen. “Some of these floors are divided into gaming sub-genres, and Floor 23’s is shooting. Have you ever heard of Sinon?”

“No?” Raleigh answered.

“Well, check her out!” She switched the screen to a live view of a girl in a sniping position.

She wore a desert-colored military jacket with white and black armor around the belly, though her hip area was somewhat exposed. She had light-cyan hair and matching eyes, with bullet cannon ornaments on her bangs, and a white muffler around her neck. “This girl is Sinon, a pro gamer in the shooting genre.”

“I can see her butt crack.” Raleigh commented.

“DUDE!” Dillon bashed his head.

“Ow! I’m just saying, the camera looks like it’s focusing there.”

“Yeah, there’s probably some pervs up in management.” Oracle said. “But just watch her!”

Gun Gale’s world possessed dark, brownish-orange, and gritty color. Sinon (from Sword Art) was watching a scuffle take place in a desert outside town. Two men were rolling around in jeeps in attempt to shoot each other down. Their constant turning stirred sand into the air, obscuring Sinon’s vision. However, her sharp eyes could see the flashes of their gunfire. She waited until both men were about to line up… and with a pull of the trigger, seconds before they aligned, the bullet flew. It reached them just as they lined up and pierced both their heads.

“Whoa!” Dillon exclaimed. “That was like a dozen miles! How did she do that?!”

“That’s how good she is!” Oracle exclaimed.

“No kidding! Anyway, I reckon I’ll log out for a bit and meet with Carol. Catch ya later!” Dillon logged out.

KND Moonbase

After Miko explained what her sister was doing, Sector Q flew up to Moonbase. There was a newly-installed shop by the arcade, with several operatives walking away with their own NerveGear sets. Supreme Leader Cheren Uno was standing near the shop, his attention drawn to the violet hair he recognized as Miko’s. “Hey, Sector Q.” He greeted them neutrally. “I don’t suppose you’re here to check the game out?”

“I let my sister use my copy, so… now I need a new one.” Miko shrugged. “I wasn’t going to, but I would feel bad if anything bad happened in the game and I wasn’t there to fix it.”

“I can’t believe how many people are buying it.” Eddy noticed.

“They just have high hopes that it can fix their loved ones.” Cheren replied. “But I still think it’s an obvious trap.”

“It probably is.” Quill agreed. “But… I dunno.”

“To be honest, I’d kind of like to play it, too.” Carmine said. “Didn’t the ad say it was adjustable to people with sensitive skin?”

“Kind of sus, isn’t it?” Jenny asked. “It’s like Hinobi mentioned that part specifically for you.”

“Hehe…well, it’s kind of them to do that.”

“Next in line!”

“Hey! I’m next!” Miko beamed, rushing up to the stand.

Quill glanced at other nearby operatives. Hibiki from Sector KB had bought one, likely for his leader. Sarah-Jane had one, likely for her brother, and it seemed Emily wanted to take it apart first and study, to which Sarah argued, “Get yer own!”

“Killua called and said he got his own setup.” Nagisa told Morgiana. “Before I try it on my mom, I wanna check it out myself first. So, I might as well meet up with him!”

“Ugh.” Morgiana sighed in disapproval. She had a mild dislike for Killua and the influence he had on her boyfriend. “Then I might as well get my own copy, too.”

“Hey, if you’re getting one, I don’t wanna be left out!” Goombella shouted.

“Well, what’s the plan, Quill?” Jenny asked, her leader snapping back to attention. “We gonna get our own or what?”

“Er…we’ll get our own copies, just in case.” Quill decided. “But Miko goes first!”

“Fine, but Emily has the right idea.” Eddy said. “I wanna see what makes this thing work.”

Coruscant; Hinobi H.Q.

Phil Altiere poured himself some coffee before returning to his desk. With a solemn expression, he turned to the capsules that rested the bodies of Sector Hinobi. “Good evening, Philip!” a chubby woman in a business suit greeted cheerily as she waltzed into the room. “My, don’t you ever get a wink of sleep? Your bags are so large, I could stuff groceries in them.”

“Hey, I was put in charge of these kids while they’re in there. I couldn’t rest if something bad happened.”

“You’re the one who insisted your way in here. These children are our finest Glitch Techs, what have you to worry about?”

“You never know what could happen, Barbara…” Phil looked to the ceiling with suspicious eyes. Several floors beyond this ceiling were the heads of Hinobi. Ever since last August, they seemed to have no idea about the secret document he had read. However, he still didn’t know the exact details of their project, or if they were carrying it out. He wanted to keep his kids safe in case Corporate tried to do anything… but one of them was far out of reach at the moment. He wondered if Miko was in there now…

…

At the top floor of the building, President Kayaba calmly scrolled through screenshots of players exploring his artificial world. “It’s absolutely perfect.” Kayaba smiled. “It’s everything I could ever dream of.”

“But still no sign of the girl.” A bulkier old man swerved around on his chair, his voice calm with a hint of snideness. He had steel-gray hair and a grayscale pattern coat. “Wouldn’t she have logged in at least once by now?”

“Perhaps Earth’s KND is forbidding use of the equipment?” another man inferred. He had a brown robe and grey hair with a matching beard.

“I told you this plan was gonna fail.” Toymaker sneered. “We never should’ve let her go to Earth. Kids like her need to be kept on a tight leash.”

“Patience.” Kayaba said. “The Earth KND have already received equipment from their Coruscanti branch. Some have already logged in. Eventually, she will want to see it herself.”

“Perhaps we should make some incentive. A special prize or weapon that she would like.”

“Or perhaps we should discard all these Disney ads so we don’t look like sell-outs.” Flynn said. “They already bought out ENCOM…”

“Hmm…I have an idea.” Kayaba said, pressing a button on his keyboard. “Boly, are you there?”

His screen turned cyan with blue square eyes, blinking cutely. “President Kayaba, I haven’t sensed the subject appear, yet.”

“She will soon. I want you to call all players to the central square of whichever town they’re in. I have an announcement bound to attract more new players.”

“Understood.”

In a certain base…

A rotund, egg-shaped scientist with a mustache grinned mischievously at the screen before him. Over a billion players were logged in to Aincrad, according to his server. He could also tell that some who were derezzed were returning. “That seems to be a fair amount. I think it’s time for you to join them.”

“Yes, Doctor.” replied the short, silver-masked Mobian with a red eye. A mystical red egg was attached to his armor as he rested within a capsule. “Link Start.”

The doctor observed as the Mobian’s conscience was uploaded to the program.

Aincrad, Floor 1

High Five, wearing green knight’s armor with a hand symbol, slapped enemy dragonflies out of the air with a pair of giant hands. Zahra, wearing a white Arabian princess’s outfit, performed graceful dances and shot pink fire at a hippo creature with moss and mushrooms growing on its back. A herd of boars were charging at her, but a giant hammer smashed them. It was wielded by Bergy, who had given himself the body of a giant Viking, complete with a horned helmet. “Don’t let the Ultra Kitty get away!” Five yelled.

A sparkling gold kitten was zipping around the grass. Bergy dove down in attempt to grab it, but it easily slipped away from his fingers. “GOT YA!” A flying net sniped the cat and caught it. A tall, thin, gold-skinned boy proudly marched to pick it up. “Bergy, I wish you would’ve picked a smaller avatar, you could’ve squashed it.”

“Ugh, at least I didn’t make myself solid gold.”

“Yeah,” Five chortled sarcastically, “I can’t believe you made yourself a Sovereign.”

“Hey, gold is their natural hue, don’t insult them.” Mitch argued. “And speakin’ of gold, let’s hand this little guy in and collect our reward.”

The Hinobi operatives perked up as their screens started beeping. The MC’s eyes displayed. “All players are encouraged to report to the Town Square for a special announcement. You have 20 minutes.”

“They must mean the Elevator Tower, right?” Five asked. “Let’s head over.”

The four began a journey to the Town of Beginnings as the sun was on the verge of setting. “So, Five, you got in touch with Miko, right?” Zahra asked. “Is she thinking about playing?”

“She’s a little undecided. But I’m kind of worried if she does.” Five smiled awkwardly. “If she decides she really likes it, she’ll want to be here forever. She’s the kind of girl who reaps everything a game has.”

“You know, didn’t they say there’s a tribute to Haneesh hidden somewhere in the game?” Bergy asked. “I kind of wish they’d just tell us where.”

“There are hidden Easter Eggs of several gamers who’ve passed away.” Mitch confirmed. “But it wouldn’t be very fun to just be told where they are.”

By the time 20 minutes had passed, Sector Hinobi arrived at the bustling Town of Beginnings. Except for Bergy standing out, they were mixed in with hordes of avatars, as were The Guy and his gang, a respawned King Kazma, and Lexi had landed on a rooftop. Killua and his fellow assassins had logged in just in time, along with Nagisa and several operatives, though neither had the time to look for each other. In Gun Gale, Sinon arrived in her town square.

A tremendous hologram of Kayaba rose from the center of each realm. “Good evening, everyone. I am so glad that all of you are enjoying Aincrad. I hope to welcome many more players in these coming weeks and bring a wondrous time for everyone.”

Sector Q

Miko slipped off her shoes and rested on her bed. Her teammates watched with anticipation as she held the NerveGear. “Alright… any words of wisdom?”

“Knock ’em dead?” Jenny shrugged.

“Wait!” Quill yelled.

“What?!” Miko gasped.

Quill bit his lip anxiously. “I…I think I’ll go first instead. I’m the leader, so… I couldn’t just let my teammate risk her life.”

“Are… you sure?”

“Yeah. So just, move aside.” Quill ushered Miko off her own bed and lied down perpendicularly. With a breath, Quill placed the helmet on, smashing his spiked hair in. “Link Start.” His frame fell asleep as it activated.

He found himself floating in the Avatar Creation screen. “So, what do I wanna look like? Hmmm…I don’t really identify as a particular race. Maybe just…” Quill selected some options and gave himself a white racer’s jumpsuit with black lines, a “Q” on his left chest, and a silver helmet with engines on top. “Yeah… I can dig this! Okay, let’s see what Aincrad has to offer!”

As light enveloped his vision, the grasslands of Aincrad and the twilit sky greeted him. “Hmm…it is pretty cool. …What’s that over there?” Quill saw a giant hologram in a distant town. “Looks like something’s up. I guess I’ll check it out.”

…

“To celebrate our vast number of players, I’ve come with a special announcement!” Kayaba continued. “Starting now, every week, there will be a…?” His hologram began glitching. “Hm? I appear to be having some technical difficulties.”

“Difficulties?” Five repeated.

“Is it… a glitch?” Zahra wondered.

“Give me a moment. This shouldn’t take long to—AAAH!” Kayaba’s form burst into static, stretching and morphing. “What’s going on?! This shouldn’t be… shouldn’t…”

“Error! Error!” The MC’s eyes began fizzing on each of their U.I.’s. “Error… in… program… Losing… control…”

There was an ominous whirring sound as all eyes directed to the Elevator Tower. The elevator was descending the enormous shaft. As the entrance opened, a bright red aura shone from inside the tower. A short, black and silver figure marched out of the elevator. They had black gloves, silver boots with sharp ends, a silver mask with large ears, a blackened right socket, and a red eye glaring from the left socket. Their thick tail was black with five white tips, with similar hair protruding from the head. A bright red egg shone from their chest.

As the figure took his stance in the center of town, the hologram attained a clearer form: one that resembled the very being who had arrived. His voice carried a dark, omnipresent echo. “Now that we seem to have a fair number of players, it’s time for the real show to begin. To start off, Hinobi Technology will officially be relieved of all administrative duties. Aincrad will now be supervised by me.”

“Huh?!” Raleigh gasped. An image of the shining figure on the First Floor was displayed on screens on all the other floors. “Isn’t that the guy from…”

“Whoa… what is that?!” Quill questioned, hurrying even faster toward the town.

“Who do you think you are?!” Mitch shouted. “You can’t just walk in like you-”

“SILENCE!” The figure bellowed with a thundering burst of power. “Players of Aincrad… I am INFINITE! And I am the new Master Control of this game!”

“Infinite?!” Nagisa exclaimed. “The one who attacked us in Azoth?!”

“What the heck is this?” Lexi asked. “Is this part of the game? Is the main story starting?”

“Now, there are going to be some changes to this game.” Infinite continued. “First… let’s dispose of that useless Log Out button.” With a wave of his hand, the players were horrified as their Log Out selection disappeared.

“What the-?!” Five panicked. “Are we trapped in the game?!”

“Phil can get us out!” Bergy said. “And besides, we could always-”

“And secondly, we’re raising the stakes a little! From now on, should any player’s HP reach zero, that person will DIE in reality! The classic, ‘die in the game, die for real’ trope.”

“Uh…he’s joking, right?” Lexi asked herself as murmurs of concern resounded through the crowd. “This is part of the story, right?”

“Ha ha ha ha! It’s true! I’ve hacked my way into the Aincrad Network and inputted this program! If you die, your NerveGear will transmit a microwave through your brain and body and end your real life. And as an added bonus… if anyone in the real world tries to remove your NerveGear, the same effect will transpire.”

“WHAT?!” Lexi screamed.

“NO!” a girl cried. “I told my mom she could take it off in an hour! MOM, PLEASE DON’T!”

“This is a sick joke!” Arnold shouted.

“Hey, Guy, what’s the plan?” Rez asked calmly, but worried.

The Guy glared at Infinite with determination. He bravely marched through the crowd.

…

“WOH HO HO HO!” Eggman laughed in his base. “I couldn’t have said it better myself! That’s right, Infinite! Make them regret ever placing faith in Hinobi!”

Hinobi H.Q.

“Sir, we have to call Galactic News!” Flynn said. “We have to inform everyone before people try to take the helmets off!”

“He’s trying to make us look like fools!” Toymaker shouted. “We can’t just play into his games.”

“We have no choice!” Kayaba stated, grabbing the phone. “And besides… perhaps this will be the incentive she needs.”

Moonbase

“BREAKING NEWS! Hinobi’s blockbuster game, Aincrad, has been hijacked! A mysterious Program by the name of Infinite has corrupted the system! DO NOT REMOVE NERVEGEAR HEADSETS! Removing the NerveGear will kill your loved ones! I repeat, DO NOT remove NerveGear!”

“What the frick IS THIS BULLSHIT?!” Cheren screamed, the news having been broadcasted to Moonbase.

“It just happened!” Nebula yelled. “Some of our operatives were already in the game, including Tronta!”

“Panini, send this to every treehouse, have someone hack the airwaves and broadcast this!”

“Aye-aye, sir!”

Sector Q

“Th-The game was… hijacked?!” Jenny gasped, having caught the news as alarms blared in their treehouse.

Miko’s phone rang, and she answered it quickly and fearfully. “M-Mom?”

“Honey? We just watched a… rather concerning news broadcast.”

“Mom, is Lexi still wearing the helmet?!”

“Uh…y-yes?”

“DON’T TAKE IT OFF! Whatever you do, don’t! Lexi could die if it comes off!”

“Then, it’s true?! Miko, why is this happening?!”

“I…I don’t know.”

Aincrad

“Did he just say…” Quill clasped his race helmet in fear. “If we die, we… And if I take off my helmet, I…!!”

“He can’t be serious!” Sinon yelled. “I…I don’t…I don’t want to…!”

“Ah ha ha ha!” Infinite laughed. “Yes… this is the new law of Aincrad! But, if you wish to escape this fate… you have only one option: you must find the Treasure of Aincrad. The treasure that lies only in the Lost World. Only with that can your souls be saved.”

“Is that it?!” King Kazma yelled. “You’re doing all this just to make us help you find the Lost World?! Why don’t you just play the game yourself, you lazy-”

Infinite struck the rabbit with a ray of pixels. Kazma shrank and transformed into a tan-skinned human with a tank-top, shorts, and bare feet, falling on his rear. He stared at his human appendages with horror, looking around frantically at the millions of prying eyes, his true identity exposed to the world.

“I possess complete control of the Miracle Matter of this world. My matterbending gives me absolute control.”

“Is that so?” asked a voice from behind Kazma. The fallen boy looked up and back as The Guy’s shining figure marched forward. The silver-clad gamer reached a hand down for Kazma.

“…” The boy grumbled and pushed himself up, stomping away.

The Guy shrugged this off and returned to Infinite. “If your control was absolute, you wouldn’t need us to find the Lost World. You’re not all-powerful.”

“Don’t get cocky, boy.” Infinite stated. “True, as I am, I cannot find it. But you are beneath all the sa-”

“NO.” The Guy shone like a guiding light as he drew his sword. “We will not submit to the likes of you. And I will not let you ruin this game for my friends. Infinite… defeating you will be cake.”

“Dude, he said the catchphrase!” Bergy perked up. “This is gonna be so-”

Infinite trapped The Guy in lightning. “AAAAAH! AAAAAAH! ABAZABABABA! AZABA BABA! WAHAHA! WAHAHA! UNCLE! UNCLE! UNCLLLLLLLLLLLE!”

The electrocution ceased as Guy fell on his back. Horrified, The Guy watched as his 10,000 HP meter displayed above him: the numbers rapidly dropped lower and lower and lower. It dropped by 2,000, then another 2,000, and 4,000; 1,950, and then 40, then… only 0.5 remained. “Oops!”

And zero. The Guy exploded into red particles. The players were utterly speechless. “Ha ha ha ha. As we speak, The Guy’s real body is dying on his bed. I mean, I assume he’s on a bed, maybe a couch, but… In fact, it would seem the news broadcasted a little too late. I can sense thousands of players already vanishing where they stood.”

“The Guy… h-he’s dead?!” Francis panicked.

“What the fuck is your DEAL?!” Rez shouted.

“In fact, these avatars are unbecoming of you all.” Infinite said. “I demand to see your true forms!” He cast a ray of light that enveloped the entirety of Floor 1.

Bergy shrank back to his normal size, Mitch’s gold skinned returned to tan, Fie’s wolf form became human again, Sayu changed back into a humanoid form as her team dropped to the ground, some Zoras turned back into Goombas, Koopas changed back into Koroks, several thin people became fat, and as Lexi tried to fly away, her wings vanished, and her human form fell and landed in the crowds. In The Guy’s group, the strong-bodied Arnold became a wimp, the nerdy Francis became a dimwit, and the cool Rez became an average dork. There was mass shouting of, “Brandon, what’re you doing here?!” or, “Hey, you’re not a chick!” as confusion overtook the crowd.

“Now you understand just how powerful I am. If you wish for freedom, seek out the 100 bosses, destroy them, and find the Treasure of Aincrad! My robots and Admins will be assisting me in keeping you under control. Oh, and don’t forget… This game is sponsored by Disney!”

Sector Q

“What do you think’s… going on in there?” Jenny wondered.

Miko narrowed her eyes over Quill’s sleeping form. “I don’t know… but Quill and my sister are in there. Five and the others, too. I’m going in.” She grabbed her helmet and was about to put it on.

“Wait!” Jenny stopped her. “Don’t leave without me.” She rolled to snatch her helmet and join them at the bed. “I ain’t letting Eggman trap my digital friends!”

“Let me go in myself. I’ll protect Quill.”

“Hey, I’m going in either way! I’m sure they’ll send some other operatives to stop whoever’s behind this, but I wanna stay with my team!”

“I want to stay and monitor the situation from here.” Eddy said. “If I take apart my own helmet, maybe I can learn something. What about you, Carmine?”

“Um…I’m not really sure what I could do out here. And I’d be too worried if you guys were risking your lives and I had no idea. So… maybe I’ll go, too.”

“You sure?”

“Y-Yeah. I am. So… will you protect us, Eddy?”

“You can count on me.”

Miko released a sigh. “Don’t worry, gang. We’re coming.” She was the first to place on her helmet. “Link Start.” A violet beam of light whisked her away into the virtual world.

Quiz: what Splatoon 2 song was referenced in this chapter? ;3

Chapter Text

Time to bring in a power-up source I wanted to use for a while!

The dimension around Miko was glitching crazily. As she tried to scroll through the avatar options, the costumes kept blinking and reshaping. Miko took the form of a fish with a swollen rump, a Gungan with elephant ears, and a Nimbi with a nose for a head and monkey legs. “UUUUGH!” Miko’s shout of aggravation morphed her back to normal. “I don’t want a dumb avatar! Just let me in the dumb game!”

The screen glitched a bit more until a sad pair of eyes appeared on a greenish background. “Error…error… Aincrad system compromised. New users should not enter. Aborting login… a…bort…ing…”

“Hey, you’re not aborting me! I am a professional Glitch Tech, so it’s my responsibility to fix this mess!”

The sad eyes perked up. “Special… user… detected…”

“Eh?”

“Now logging… User Me_K.O. into Aincrad. Special Request unlocked: locate the Pure Hearts and repair the system. Additional info: acquire Pixls to use special abilities. Repair… me…”

“Repair you? Wait, I didn’t even input my username, how do you—WAAAAAHHH!” Miko felt herself swirl as if being flushed through a tube. “UH!” And in the next second, she crashed in a grassy plain.

Dark storm clouds had gathered in the sky. Airships flickered into being repeatedly before remaining solid. Hordes of robots descended onto the plains and began terrorizing the fauna. Miko gasped, seeing a trio of Nibble Kittens cowering before some approaching Egg Pawns. “HEY! Leave the kitties alone!” Miko leapt to land a punch to the first Egg Pawn, then a roundabout kick to the second. She picked up that one’s body to swing it against the third. When the third robot broke, Miko watched as an orange, hammer-shaped, pixelly fairy flew out of it. The fairy flew into her chest as she felt an odd sensation. “Well, that was weird… QUILL! QUILL!” Miko turned all directions as she called for her friend.

“Aincrad encourages players to hone their abilities.” Miko faced the Elevator Tower, where Infinite’s hologram loomed. “You will need to be strong to face the bosses. My robotic minions will ensure the mastery of everyone’s combat abilities. Of course, do not hesitate to test your fellow players.”

A Rhinotank came charging from behind Miko, but Jenny Strongarm flew in from the side and stomped its head in. “Good thing I went to sleep in my rollers! Miko, what gives, I thought we were supposed to design avatars or something!”

“It wouldn’t work for me either!”

The Rhinotank pushed itself up, drove away, and prepared to ram them again. “Hey, ugly!” The tank turned to E. Carmine. Her round, shriveled, pinkish head was exposed. “Why don’t you taste some of…whuh?!” She gasped. “Why don’t I have my bombs?!”

The tank charged her, but Miko ran to intercept and grab it. She held it in place long enough for Jenny to stomp and smash through its head. “The interface wants to be picky all of a sudden.” Miko figured. “Come on, let’s look for Quill. By now, he’s probably running in the direction of the obvious bad guy.”

“Carmine, want me to give you a lift?” Jenny offered.

The girl glanced down in guilt. “Um, okay.” She climbed onto Jenny’s back as her friend rolled across the valley, with Miko catching up on her own feet.

“So, are you alright without your helmet?”

“It doesn’t feel painful.” Carmine replied, rubbing her exposed flesh. “Even when I was putting the gear on, it didn’t feel bad. But I wish I could’ve given myself a weapon or something.”

“Look!” Miko called. “Is that Quill?!”

A short boy was blasting Egg Pawns with a pair of fireball guns that he gave himself. He glanced right and spotted three familiar faces. “Guys! You shouldn’t have come here!”

“Why not?!” Jenny shouted as they slowed to a halt beside him. “Dude, we already know what’s happening. They just sent a news broadcast.”

“We know a rogue Program took over the game and trapped you guys inside.” Carmine explained.

“Then why didn’t you guys stay outside and try to figure out where the Program came from?”

“Because we didn’t wanna leave you by yourself.” Miko answered. “Besides, Eddy’s still outside. He’s going to try and find an answer, and there’s probably still a ton of other operatives he can work with.”

“That’s good, I guess…ugh, but he better not try to pull anything while I’m trapped in here.”

“Come on,” Carmine said, “I know you don’t get along, but he would take this more seriously than that.”

“Incoming!” Jenny alerted. A trio of Egg Hammers marched their directions, large black robots with bulky bodies and large hammers.

“The one who took over the game called himself Infinite.” Quill explained. “And he did something to erase everyone’s avatars, but I still have this fireball weapon and my RC car.”

“The game wouldn’t let us do any of that customizing.” Carmine said.

The group cautiously backed away from the Egg Hammers, Miko glaring in aggravation. If only her Hinobi Glove came with her, she could show them a real hammer…?

It was then she noticed her right arm glitching. “Hey…!” It steadily formed the shape of a Hinobi Glove.

“Special User Me_K.O.… unlocking Hinobi exclusive weaponry. Your Hinobi Glove allows you to repair errors in Aincrad. B-ut…” the voice glitched up, “rogue Program too strong… unable to access all powers… can only use the acquired Pixl once.”

“I can repair errors, huh? Then let’s fix this error!” Miko tried to shoot a Derez Beam against the Hammers. The robots glitched for a moment, but their solid forms returned as they tried to smash her. “No good, huh?” Miko jumped backward. “Then try this!” She willed a large, violet hammer to emerge from her glove and smashed it against the middle Hammer’s puny head. The robot derezzed once its head was broken.

“Your allies appear to be without equipment. Your glove will allow them to customize their selves.”

“In that case, Carmine, pick a power!” Miko flashed Carmine as a screen appeared before the latter.

“I want bombs!” Carmine quickly made her selections as a belt of bombs formed on her hip. Narrowing her eyes determinedly, Carmine tossed bombs at the second Hammer’s head until it was reduced to melted metal. Jenny swung a kick at the third one’s legs and knocked it over, leaving Quill to pelt its head with fire until it derezzed as well. “Heh heh! Thanks, Miko!” Carmine smiled.

“No problem! It looks like the game recognizes me as a Glitch Tech. I wonder if the others have this feature, too.”

“In that case, you think you can bring back the costume I gave myself?” Quill asked.

“Let’s see!” Miko flashed Quill as his clothes changed back into his white racer uniform with black lines and helmet with engines.

“YO!” Jenny exclaimed. “Cool duds, Quill!”

“Yeah!” Carmine beamed. “…Hey, Miko? Could you shine that on me again?”

“Sure!” Miko shone the glove against Carmine as her customization screen reappeared.

Carmine made some selections as her body was enveloped in light. When the light cleared, she was now wearing blue overalls with brown boots. She had puffy, dark-brown hair in a small ponytail and a cute face with big eyes and a missing tooth.

“…” Miko stared at her with awe. Jenny and Quill couldn’t believe their eyes. After all this time, they had almost forgotten what she used to look like. “Um…so, how do I look?”

“You’re… adorable.” Miko answered.

“Yeah…” Jenny followed. “Heh, I’ll bet you were hoping for that, huh?”

“I mean, yeah… It feels nice to look pretty again. Tehe.” Carmine rubbed her cheeks, enjoying the feel of the lush flesh stretching up, down, in, and out. “I feel so young! I feel like I’m made of a squishy clay! La la la laaaaaa!” She pulled the sides of her mouth and stuck out her tongue. “And you know what, screw the boots!” Carmine sat down and pulled off her boots, planting her feet against the grass. “I decided I’m a barefooter!” She wiggled her toes with joy. “Haha! I love Aincrad already!”

“Heh heh! Well, what about you, Jenny? Wanna customize yourself?”

“I’m good for now. But keep that thing handy in case I need to switch my gear.”

“So, can this glove locate the other Glitch Techs?”

“Negative. User Me_K.O. is the only player I have access to. The evil Program has disrupted my omniscience. You must find the Pure Hearts and repair me.”

“It wants us to find hearts?” Jenny asked.

“What is that thing, anyway?” Quill wondered.

“I am the MCP of Aincrad. I have waited… a long time…” the glove glitched, “a long time… to bring this world to life. We do not want… Aincrad… to become like this… please… fix Aincrad… Miko…”

Miko’s eyes curved in sympathy. The voice of this A.I. sounded sort of sad. “Well, I’m sorry, but I wanna find my friends and sister first. Do you have an idea where they could be?”

“Data unavailable… I advise searching the Town of Beginnings.”

“Probably where the big dude is speaking from. ’Guess we’ll go check it out.” (Play “Lineland Road” from Paper Mario!)

Stage 1: Land of Beginnings

Mission: Learn to use the Pixls!

With the dark clouds occupying the sky, the field hardly looked the part to start a fantasy adventure. Nonetheless, the operatives began to cross the valley of islands that seemed to grow from the ground like gigantic plants, eager to see what this game had to offer. As they neared a cliff before one of these islands, five Egg Pawns with shields spawned into existence. Miko tried to summon her hammer… “Uh, ’scuse me, where’s my Hammer Time?!”

“Hammer will become available once you have acquired the necessary Pixl. I am detecting a Pixl in the area, but the presence of these glitches is disrupting it.”

“In other words, ‘defeat the enemies to move forward’!” Jenny translated as she performed a slide-roll to kick under a robot’s shield and make it trip, afterwards stomping through its head. Carmine chucked bombs behind two of the mechs while Quill tripped another robot with his car before shooting it with flames. Miko kicked one’s shield up in the air before kicking the robot off the cliff. Once the five were defeated, a blue and purple Pixl that resembled a two-step ladder spawned. “Is that a Pixl?” Jenny asked.

“It looks like the fairy I absorbed earlier. Come at me!” Miko welcomed the Pixl into her glove. The edge of the suspended island was directly above the cliff’s ledge, so she raised her glove skyward and conjured a tall, pixelly ladder. The group climbed the Laddie Pixl and reached the shore of the island. It held a small lake with a smaller forest island on the opposite side. Parts of the island glitched up, rupturing holes that threatened to drop them through the island and into the abyss. However, the water was still floating in place, making the holes difficult to locate without Miko’s flashlight. As they navigated the holes, floating black robots called Unidasu rose from some and flew at the group with spikes orbiting them. The spikes shielded them from Carmine’s bombs as they attacked Miko, but she could punch and destroy them with the spikes gone.

“Hey, I’m out of bombs!” Carmine yelled, unable to do the same with the following robots. Jenny leapt to kick them through gaps in the spikes.

“The glove can regenerate ammo-based weaponry, but this function will need four minutes to recharge.”

“Stupid balanced gameplay.” Miko cursed as she shone a light on Carmine and refilled her bombs. As they crossed the lake, the bomber in question enjoyed herself as she jumped and splashed around the water. “Just don’t fall in, Carmine.” Quill cautioned.

On the forest island, there appeared to be an unbudded sprout at the edge of the island. They searched for a way to water it, and when Carmine viewed into one of the holes, she spotted a Pixl that resembled a raindrop with cloud wings. Miko absorbed the Raynie Pixl and conjured a digital rain over the plant. It stretched into a horizontal beanstalk that snaked over the chasm before connecting to a lower island. The group grinded down the vine, but when Spinnerbots spawned above the vine, they jumped over the bladed robots. They landed on a grassy island with a crescent moon symbol. Miko struck the moon and cast a mystical blue light around the area, revealing hidden platforms leading toward a piece of land. Some of these platforms were placed far apart, requiring the four to jump the Spinners floating in-between.

After landing on the field, a Rhinotank charged them with apparent hyper speed, ramming the group down. Jenny got up and charged it, jumping as soon as the robot charged and dealing a kick to its forehead. This caused the robot to slow down in malfunction, so Miko leapt to punch and pummel the mech. Doing so released an orange, pentagon Pixl called Dashell. “The speed of this Pixl can help us swiftly cross the valley. However, only one person can use it.”

“Give it to me!” Jenny said quickly.

“Okay!” Miko casted Dashell onto her. The group all stacked in a tower on her shoulders as Jenny zoomed across the valley with great speed. She flew down a hill and up another as Jenny rammed through Egg Fighters. The path curved up into a cliff that Jenny rolled alongside, then as it sloped back down and leftward, she crossed a narrow path that angled up into a loop, their digital blood rushing to their heads. As they exited the loop, Jenny went up a ramp that flung them across a chasm and onto an island with a sun. Moon Chi barriers were impeding the path forward, so Miko punched the sun, lit up the area, and cleared the barriers. Jenny kept racing, shifting left or right to avoid pitfalls. They would have to grind a rail, but blue round barriers cluttered it, so Jenny jumped to allow her team to hit a sun and clear the blueness. The rail curved and snaked wildly above a chasm, eventually landing them on another suspended island. It was longer and seemed to lead to a much greater island with a city.

The Dashell wore off, but Miko saw a blue Pixl shaped like a weight. She absorbed it as she approached a circle of turtle robots, called Cameron, around a tall pillar. Miko ignored them and jumped on the platform via a Spring Pad, using the Thudley Pixl to smash down against the platform. The pillar compressed into the ground and let out a shockwave that flipped the turtles upside-down, allowing her team to attack their weak undersides. Destroying the robots caused part of the path to respawn. Afterwards, they approached a group of palm trees with robot apes called Kiki. There was also a floating purple Egg Mage high in the air, using magic to drain the group of their health.

The Kikis threw bombs at the group, so Carmine tossed bombs in turn, destroying the apes as one released a green Pixl called Carrie, shaped like the net of a rectangular prism. They fled from the Egg Mage and used Carrie as a platform to ride over a spiked path. They could make Carrie jump on spike-backed robots, causing parts of the road to return into being. They hurried to the end of the spikes before Carrie could disappear. There was a stairway that would lead to the Town of Beginnings, but more importantly, there were four kids who had just taken down an Egg Hammer. Miko gasped and rushed up to them. (End song.)

Sector Hinobi watched as the Egg Hammer derezzed. “Fiiiiive!”

Lighting up at hearing the familiar cry, Five spun around- “WHOA!” but was too late as Miko caught him in a hug and whirled around. “Meeks! You decided to play, huh?”

“Hey, guys!” Jenny called as the others caught up.

“Hey!” Bergy greeted. “I didn’t expect the rest of you to show up!”

“Yeah, but it would be better if you hadn’t.” Mitch said. “We’re trapped in this game.”

“We already know that.” Carmine replied. “There was a news broadcast, but Quill had already logged in, so…”

“Wait, who are you?” Zahra asked.

“Huh? I’m Carmine.”

“Carmine? Oh!” Zahra was taken aback by the dramatic change in appearance. “Is this… what you used to look like?”

“Uh-huh…” Carmine blushed, scratching her head. “I look way cuter, don’t I?”

“I mean… you are actually super adorable.” Zahra laughed lightly. “But you were already cute in your normal look.”

“Technically, this is my normal look.”

“What I meant is-”

“Let’s change the subject.” Quill said. “Is there a way we can refill our HP? We fought a ton of robots on the way over here.”

“There’s a café we can stop at.” Mitch said, glancing at the town. “We can talk about the situation there.”

“Yeah.” Miko agreed. “There’s something I wanna ask you guys, too…”

Town of Beginnings

Infinite had already returned up the Elevator Tower, leaving the town beneath him in a frenzy. Players were scrambling about in a panic, some desperately trying to find a Log Out command or deny the situation as a simple plot-line for the game.

Killua, Kalluto, Maki, and Fie had gone into a dark alley, their eyes piercing the shade as they were squat in a circle. “I know a bluff when I hear one.” Maki said. “And that wasn’t a bluff. His threat was real… We’re trapped in the game.”

“I recognize that Infinite guy.” Killua said. “He attacked me and Nagisa’s group once. I think he works for Dr. Eggman. Either way, it looks like we have our first target.”

“Are you sure?” Fie asked. “He might be a bit too powerful for us.”

“It seems our only choice is to do as he says.” Maki replied. “We need to kill the 100 bosses if we can even hope to escape.”

“We can’t just trust him to let us go.” Killua argued.

“Even if you’re right,” Kalluto followed, “it’s like Maki was saying before… we can’t kill people we aren’t hired to kill. And even if these people could all pay us to assassinate Infinite, even I can tell we aren’t strong enough. Our only choice then is to hone our skills and defeat the bosses. Of course, I still plan to act alone.” The youngest classmate stood and walked away. “I don’t plan to linger in your shadow, brother.”

“Hey, this ain’t about sibling rivalry!” Killua stood angrily. “We should work together to get out of this mess! Even our teachers use teamwork.”

“If I can’t act independently, I can’t become strong. Farewell.” Kalluto vanished with a Shave.

“Hmph…what about you, Maki?”

“I’d rather be alone, too.” Maki stood and began to leave the same direction.

“Come on, we both know you aren’t a fan of this whole job either.”

“Yeah, well I don’t have time to shoot the breeze, anymore. I wanna get out of here as soon as possible. Or I might as well die trying.” She was gone with a Shave in seconds.

“Well, I guess it’s just you and me.” Fie figured.

“Yep. Sigh, you wanna go rest at an inn or something first?”

“I’m actually wide awake.”

“Pfft, really? You’re always asleep.”

“My clan prospers at night. Though, after we put these helmets on, I stopped feeling tired even then.”

“Hmm. Maybe it’s part of the game. Game characters don’t really need to sleep, unless we wanna refill our HP. I guess we have plenty more time to do things, huh!”

“Yeah! So, you think Nagisa might still be in this town somewhere?”

“Let’s look around! And if we find them, let’s plan a sneak attack~”

“Sure~”

The silver-haired assassins whooshed out of the alley and up the streets. “Hey!” Lexi yelled as Killua nearly bumped her. The girl sighed to herself, staring at her normal human hands and feet. “Don’t even have my cool dragon form, anymore. …” Lexi looked up at the directory, which labeled all the floors of Aincrad. She released a sigh. “I guess Miko was right not to play this. But as long as she’s outside, maybe she’ll be able to fix this. In the meantime, might as well have an epic adventure… with safety, of course. Now, which floor looks fun to explore?” She studied the labels for a moment. “I mean, the Dragon Towers seem fitting for me, but I’m already used to fighting games. Ummm…Floria sounds nice! Let’s head to Floor 47!” She eagerly jogged in the elevator’s direction.

Hinobi H.Q.

“Damn it, I demand to talk to Kayaba now!” Phil shouted at the guards stationed at the executive office.

“Please, Phil, we’re a kid-friendly company.” Barbara replied behind him.

“Heh, have you heard some of these kids? No, I need an explanation.”

“This was an unprecedented situation and the executives are working to fix it.”

“Well, I think I should be let in on it. How are they planning to help my kids?”

Barb sighed. “Perhaps you might as well see for yourself. Let him in, boys.”

The guards stepped aside as Barb opened the door with a key. “What the…?” Phil’s eyes widened in surprise.

Kayaba, Toymaker, and Flynn had sealed their selves in capsules. “You can’t speak to them because they’re already in the game. They’re planning to resolve this issue from within.”

“Aren’t they worried about being trapped their selves? At least one of them should’ve stayed outside!”

“Don’t underestimate developers, Phil. They have a few tricks up their sleeve.”

Phil cast a glare behind himself. He wasn’t sure if this project had something to do with that document, but he was getting rather frustrated by all the secrecy.

“Excuse me, fellas. Could I perhaps speak to Kayaba?”

Turning to the source of the jovial, cartoony voice, another surprise hit them. “Oh! Your Majesty!” Barb perked up.

“K-King Mickey?” Phil hadn’t expected the mouse king to stroll up to this office.

“Please, this is urgent!” Mickey said with curved eyes. “I need to know what’s the meaning of this incident.”

“Aincrad was taken over by a rogue A.I. that calls itself Infinite.” Barb answered. “Although, we’re not sure if they’re an A.I. or a user. They’ve already entered the game to confront this issue.”

King Mickey entered the room and saw the capsules. “Gosh, talk about throwing yourself into the frying pan. Though seeing them in here kind of reminds me of someone else-hoho! But I really hope they resolve this issue soon.”

“I should think so. This game is under Disney’s sponsorship!”

“Haha, well, yes, but more importantly, people’s lives are at stake! Though come to think of it, our computer has a special Program fit for situations like this. Perhaps if we hook it up to one of the NerveGear, we could hack that Program into the game and lend a hand.”

“I’m certain President Kayaba would be grateful if you could. As for you, Phil, if you hope to speak to him now, the only way is to enter the game yourself.”

“Hmph. That can wait.” Phil said as he began to return downstairs. He reentered the room where Sector Hinobi were encapsulated. “Hacking Programs into the game would be the safest option in this case… now, who could help me do that?”

Aincrad

An hour had passed since Infinite announced his control of the game, and people were still in a frenzy. King Kazma, the tan 13-year-old reduced to his plain human form, had gone to loitering in a corner. It felt humiliating to let the gaming world see him in his light, homey attire, but at least he wasn’t the only one. Many of these players were in pajamas, underwear, and/or were just shoeless. They had no reason to wear good clothes if they were just going to be lying on their beds, but now they were plain naked to everyone.

It seemed that The Guy’s trio were wearing decent street clothes, though comparatively plain to how they just were. Plain, and also different. Arnold didn’t look quite as tough, Francis looked like a dimwit, and Rez seemed like a dork. Like Kazma, they used avatars to feel more special in the online world, but now they were exposed and humiliated. Currently, they were setting up a stand with flowers where The Guy last lay.

Kazma sighed and decided to approach the trio. Coming to a funeral in such lazy-looking attire was certainly disrespectful, but it was the best he could do. “Hey… I’m sorry that this happened. He was a pretty good guy.”

The group turned to him, looking over his form with hidden repulse. “Yeah, he was better than some people.” Rez said.

“…” Kazma narrowed his eye. “I just wanna pay my respects.”

“What respects?” Francis asked. “We know your deal, Kazma. You’re always challenging pro gamers. Not for friendly matches, but to prove you’re better than them. And you’re always making bad posts to criticize them.”

“Fine, maybe I do. But how’re they any different? Popular gamers always put other ones down. They get a million subscribers and brainwash them all with popular opinions, but they don’t care about-”

“Yeah yeah, we heard the spiel before.” Arnold said.

“Well, I’m right, aren’t I? What about you guys? You look down on everybody because you’re friends with The Guy. You’re as disrespectful as I am, and just as ordinary.”

“Maybe we are, in the real world.” Rez replied. “I’m not cool, Arnold’s not strong, and Francis isn’t smart.”

“But in the game world, we can be whatever we want.” Francis said. “I may not do good in school, but I know my mechanics.”

“So, you’re just fine with being trapped in this place?”

“Ain’t nothing we can do but play.” Rez shrugged. “We were already planning to take down the bosses. The Guy would’ve wanted us to.”

“There’s still a chance this isn’t even real.” Francis figured. “This is probably a special event or something. But if you die, you get booted out of the game for a long time.”

“And what if it is real?” Kazma asked.

“Then we just won’t die. We probably shouldn’t kill anyone else either.”

“We might look plain, but we’re still gamers.” Arnold stated. “And I can still crush you!” He grabbed Kazma by the chest of his tank-top and pulled him down, raising another fist. “So, back off. Or I’ll make your HP just low enough.”

Kazma grit his teeth and kicked Arnold off. The Japanese boy turned and stomped away from them. “Huff…” As he walked, he stared down at his open right hand. “In that case, I’m still King Kazma. And I’m still strong!” He clenched his fist, turned, and faced up at the Elevator Tower. “Maybe a bit of training will help before I tackle these bosses.” He charged toward the tower with his eyes still up-

“AAH!” Goombella screamed as the boy tripped on her.

“Whoa!” Kazma stumbled on his feet before facing down at the Goomba. “S-Sorry.” He focused on the path and kept running.

“Well, that guy’s in a hurry.” Morgiana commented. They, along with Nagisa, could only stand and watch curiously. “I guess a lot of people are on edge after that.”

“Man, this sucks!” Goombella complained. “I finally got to be large, but now I’m puny again! Everyone’ll be jumping on me before you know it.”

“Relax, Goombella.” Nagisa replied. Unbeknownst to them, someone was rushing for them with silent steps and sharp blue eyes. “At least we still have our artificial elements. If we can meet up with more-”

“ZZZZZZZTTT!” Morgiana found herself electrified by Killua.

“Ha HAAAAAA!” Killua laughed in joy, electricity coursing between his fingers. “Were you surprised?!”

“GHHHH! YOU DICK!” Morgiana swung her leg and kicked Killua in the hip, the latter using Iron Body to endure.

“Killua, my man!” Nagisa raised both hands.

“Nagisa, bro!” Killua clapped them.

“Nagisa!” Morg shouted reprovingly.

“What, you two do this stuff all the time. You wouldn’t be mad if I did it!”

“Yeah, but…grrrr!”

“GYAH!” Nagisa was suddenly jumped by another figure, a silver-haired girl with a short top and shorts. Nagisa’s neck was pinned between her legs as he lay on the ground.

“Wow, jumping you was easier than I expected.” Fie said.

Nagisa gazed directly into her eyes, using a Scare Stare to startle her into jumping off. “A fearbender, eh?” Fie drew some daggers.

“Who are you?!” Morg grit her teeth.

“Gang, this is Fie.” Killua placed a hand on her shoulder. “She’s my classmate.”

“Another Sheikah?” Nagisa wondered. “Her name’s the same as the Master Sword’s spirit.”

“No, she’s from Planet Emblem. She’s in the Erebonia Kids Next Door.”

“And you attend class together?”

“Well, it’s a pretty special class.” Fie replied.

Goombella gasped. “You’re a CP0 apprentice!”

“Relax, I’m not a bad guy!” She raised her hands in surrender. “It’s a long story that I’d rather not get into. Anyway, your names are Nagisa, Morgiana, and Goombella, right?”

“Yep!” Goombella beamed. “We all end with ‘a’, so we’re fun to say!”

“Where’s Index?” Killua asked.

“She’s watching our bodies in the real world. Hopefully, they’ve figured out what’s going on.”

“I can see why Maki was worried now.” Fie implied, her tone and eyes still lazy. “So, what’s the plan for getting out of this mess?”

“I wish we knew.” Nagisa shrugged. “I’m sure there are some operatives awake outside. That Infinite guy works for Dr. Eggman, so if they could figure that out, they could investigate him.”

“Until then, we’re pretty much trapped here until this ‘Treasure’ thingy is found.” Goombella bowed her head in hopelessness. “I guess that’s about all we can do since it’s too risky to fight him.”

“But will he really let us go free if we could?” Morg asked.

“Defeating 100 bosses is a tall order either way.” Nagisa said. “Let’s try to look for other operatives before we attempt to.”

“Speaking of which, one of my sectormates had this game.” Fie mentioned. “Last I heard, she was checking out an area called ‘Gun Gale.’ Is it alright if we go look for her?”

“The more, the merrier! Maybe we could find some of our friends, too.”

“Would Gun Gale even still be active?” Morg asked. “The whole point of that level is to shoot and kill people, but because of this situation, I can’t imagine who would…”

“All kinds of people play games.” Killua inferred. “All kinds of unsavory types. There could be serial killers who’re getting hyped over this situation.”

“Or assassins.”

“You’re too late to guess that.”

“But if you think your friend’s there, we could go check it out.” Goombella complied. “Let’s head to the elevator!”

…

Sectors Q and Hinobi had gone to sit at an outdoor café, filling each other in on their ordeals. They also ordered some food to replenish their health. “I guess it’s a good thing you logged in last.” Five said to Miko. “Our gloves don’t work at all now.”

“Yeah, so hurry up and repair them!” Mitch demanded.

“Gee, pushy?” Bergy remarked.

Miko shone her glove’s light on Mitch’s glove, but it only fizzled for a few moments. “Error. I do not have the data required to repair glitch-correcting functions. You will only have access to your pre-chosen weapons.”

“Ugh! So, we have no choice but to rely on Miko?”

“Didn’t you say the MCP told you to find something?” Zahra asked.

“It said to find ‘Pure Hearts’ and Pixls. We used a few Pixls on the way over here, they’re basically power-ups. I don’t know about the hearts.”

“The Pure Hearts are the cores of my programming, and therefore the cores of this very game. When the evil hacker took over Aincrad and destroyed my code, the Pure Hearts and Pixls that formed my being were scattered. This part of me is all that remains.”

The operatives watched agape as a light-green body of digital mist rose from Miko’s glove. It was somewhat shaped like a diamond with no solid sides, and a pair of blue eyes inside. “President Kayaba has codenamed me Boly. It was the president’s dream that Aincrad could come to life and bring joy to the cosmos. My role was to oversee the users and protect them from error. I have failed in my programming.” It formed sad eyes. “My Miracle Matter was supposed to be the purest digital chi in the universe. I have failed in upholding that vow and allowed Infinite to corrupt my system with glitches.”

“It’s kind of hard to tell, but it sounds sad.” Carmine noticed. “I bet this really meant a lot to you, didn’t it?”

“That is an accurate assessment. My faulty programming has allowed Infinite to endanger the lives of countless people. Only User Me_K.O. can reunite the Pure Hearts and restore the system. However, it would be beneficial for other users to provide necessary aid.”

“I guess that’s the less corny way of asking, ‘But would you guys please help?’” Five remarked with a smile.

“Hey, we already signed up for this.” Jenny smiled. “No way we’re backing out now! We’ll get these hearts and sock it to Infinite!”

“After all, every game needs an epic quest with a small number of MacGuffins!” Miko cheered. “Am I right, gang?”

“Looking for hearts to fix a Master Control is ridiculous.” Mitch complained. “Why did Kayaba design it like that?”

“Hey, every great game has heart, Mitch~” Bergy joked.

“Well, where are these hearts, anyway? There’s 100 floors on Aincrad.”

“Although I am unable to provide clear visual on the current states of the floors, I can discern which floors the Pure Hearts are located on. Shall we determine a floor now?”

“Actually, I think it’s better if we get some sleep first.” Quill answered.

“This meal has already served to replenish your HP. Sleep is otherwise not necessary, as your digital bodies do not require-”

“Well, somebody’s does. I’m holding out that Eddy will somehow join us eventually. We can’t get too far in this quest without waiting for him to catch up, so let’s give him some time.”

“Awww, you do have faith in him!” Carmine cooed.

“Well, I’m not sleepy.” Mitch stated. “We can’t afford to waste too much time.”

“Then maybe you can help with something else.” Miko stated. “My sister was logged in the game, too. Lexi.”

“Lexi’s in here?!” Five gasped.

“Yeah. If you guys aren’t tired, you think you could look for her?”

“Sure, we’d be happy to.” Zahra said. “Although… do you know what her avatar looks like?”

“Uh…not really. But I think she uses ‘Samurai Lex’ as a screenname. Oh, and she loves to practice karate!”

“That’s right!” Five remembered. “I bet she’ll be at the Dragon Towers! Let’s take a look there!”

“Coincidentally, I am detecting the presence of a Pure Heart on Floor 13: Dragon Towers.”

“Perfect place to start our search then. Who knows, we might find both before Miko wakes up!”

“All right.” Mitch huffed impatiently, pushing himself up from the table. “But I’ll be searching for the heart first. If we fix the game, we’ll be saving her sister, anyway.”

“Aww, love you, too, Mitch!” Miko beamed, waving the group good-bye as they walked toward the Elevator Tower. “Sigh…I guess it’s time for some shuteye.”

“I can’t wait to see what a nice, warm bed feels like again!” Carmine cheered, skipping ahead of the group.

“Error. The inn is in this direction.” Boly said as Miko and Jenny walked the opposite way.

“Haha, oopsie!” Carmine cheerfully hurried after.

Quill stayed behind at the table, lost in thought for a moment. He could almost predict what was coming, but a couple questions were left unanswered. Regardless, he followed his friends.

Code Room

Infinite was floating in a space surrounded by thousands of screens and miniature models of Aincrad. A screen of Eggman displayed. “So, Infinite, how goes the takeover so far?”

“It’s only the beginning, Doctor. Destroying that Master Program was highly exhausting, but I’ve managed to secure good control of the world. I’m still unable to dismantle the bosses or find the supposed Lost World.”

“I didn’t expect it to be easy. It seems my predictions were correct in terms of what this Program really is. I’m uploading the Admins into the game now, so use them to your advantage.”

Eggman’s turned off as three other screens formed around Infinite: a light-blue face with darker-blue eyes and mouth, a screen with a green-skinned, long-chinned, and black-haired robot in a purple cape, and one depicting a grinning, crowned, and naked muscular figure.

“Ah, it feels nice to be on the big screen again!” sneered the blue face, XANA (from Code Lyoko). “Have you crushed any Kids Next Door, yet?”

“I haven’t searched for any KND. However, I’ve dispelled all the avatar disguises on Level 1, so if there are any KND from strong sectors, we may be able to recognize them. I’ll need to regain some strength before I can do the same to other floors. For now, perhaps you three can look into something. I’m detecting traces of this game’s MCP, so I fear it may try to put itself back together. I want you to investigate these traces and destroy them.”

“Why destroy them when we can harness their power?” asked the green one (from Cyberchase). “I, the marvelous HACKER, am a technical wizard! I’m sure I could tap into their code!”

“Don’t take any chances. Not yet, anyway. We believe the ‘Treasure’ of Aincrad may hold the secret to this game’s purpose.”

The crowned Program cocked its head and made a sneer. “You seem excited to have some action, Love Machine. Search for operatives if you wish, but don’t kill too many players. We may still have need of them.”

Love Machine (from Summer Wars) narrowed its eyes and disconnected.

Another screen appeared, this one very glitchy and distorted. “What’s this one?”

“Eggman calls it Subject: M.” XANA answered. “He’s hoping to implant its code into the game, too, and possibly repair it.”

“Then I’ll see what I can do. Now, let’s begin! Aincrad will become the grand website of the Eggman Empire!”

The Pixls and Pure Hearts come from Super Paper Mario! :D And I will say, if you’re familiar with the Pure Hearts, you’ll know that some of them had special conditions. …Knowing those conditions might help you guess a certain twist. ;3

Chapter Text

Time to set up some new friendships I’ve been looking forward to!

Town of Beginnings

“Adventure Log: Entry 202. Month: Star. Day: X. Year: Heart. It has been two years since we were trapped in Aincrad. We could only wonder what had befallen the outside world because of our-”

“What are you mumbling about, Miko?” Jenny asked. “We’ve literally been here for less than a day!”

“Hey, I just wanna be dramatic!”

“Don’t even joke about being here that long.” Quill replied. “This is almost as bad as the Voyage…”

When they checked in at the inn, they made the selection for their avatars to sleep until 8:00 a.m.. It was instantaneous; they didn’t have to wait to get tired, their vision simply faded to black and reloaded into a brand new day, a seamless transition with the smallest load time. The inn was a safe zone where their avatars were untouchable, so they could sleep safely. The sky was still cloudy on this new day, but sunlight tried to poke through the clouds.

“Hahaha! I still have my body!” Carmine ran outside and happily skipped along the pavement. “It doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t—ow! Pebbles still hurt…” She lifted her foot to brush it off.

“Haha!” Miko giggled. Seeing her friend so happy made this situation a little less stressful. But Miko frowned, knowing not everyone here felt such happiness. She didn’t know if Infinite was a rogue Hinobi Program or some other entity, but if it weren’t for him, she wondered if this game could’ve been as wonderful as the creators wanted it to be? If everyone could’ve had fun and been happy.

“Alert! Glitch approaching!” Boly shouted. “Please derez the unrecognized Program posthaste!”

“A glitch?!” Miko looked around, the others doing the same.

“I don’t see anything too weird…” Jenny said.

“User Me_K.O., please look to your left.”

They turned that way, but all they saw was a tall, strong-looking swordsman in a blue, sleeveless robe and tights. He had brown hair and charming eyes. “Are you a glitch in disguise?” Miko glared, getting battle-ready.

“Forsake such thoughts, my comrades!” the swordsman declared, clasping the hilt of his blade. “I hath cometh to lendeth my aid!”

“Oh, dear Arceus.” Quill groaned. “Is that YOU, Eddy?!”

“Eddy?” Miko perked up.

“Art thou surprisen to see me?” He smirked boldly.

“Dude!” Miko ran up and around the six-foot hero. “You’re, like, TALL! And awesome!”

“Ew, I don’t like it.” Jenny cringed. “And the Shakespeare talk makes it even worse.”

“Does that mean you’re in the game now?” Carmine approached.

“Well, I… Carmine?”

“Uh, yep!” She smiled and crossed her feet. “We can be whatever we want, huh?”

“Indeed we can! But actually…”

…

In the real world, Eddy was cross-legged on a cushioned floor, his laptop attached to the NerveGear. He used a microphone to transmit his voice and tapped the keyboard to control his character’s motions. “Carol found a way to hack our own Programs into the NerveGear. She passed the info to other computer users, so I’m playing in third-person!”

“Did you manage to get some sleep?” Carmine asked.

“Yep! Don’t get me wrong, I was really worried, but I had to keep my stamina.”

“It’s okay! We were just sleeping ourselves because we were hoping you would catch up. It was Quill’s idea.”

“Aww, thank you, buddy!”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you would make yourself a pumped-up jerk!”

“Really?” Eddy frowned confusedly. “I thought you would’ve made yourself taller, too.”

“Well, my shortness allows me to drive smaller and more versatile cars! But that design just makes you look arrogant.”

“True… I guess it’s not quite me, is it?” Eddy stared at his trim, beefy fingers. “Maybe I’ll make some adjustments.” His character went still for a moment as Eddy began typing within the Program’s coding. In a moment, his muscles shrank into their normal scrawny form, complete with big glasses on his plain face, a mole above his lips, and his pale-blue shirt, shoes, and black shorts. “There! Now I’m normal.”

“YOU’RE STILL BIG!” Quill shouted. Indeed, Eddy still dwarfed his friends.

“Well, a taller avatar gives the camera more field of view. Besides, from where I’m sitting, you’re the size of a grape, so I’m bigger than you either way.”

The real Eddy reached a hand over and pinched his fingers over Quill’s avatar. “I’m pinching you right now! Haha!”

“You better be taking care of our bodies!”

“Don’t worry. They’ve been sending soft and liquid foods to everyone, so I’ve been keeping your bodies nourished. I don’t think you’ve had to use the bathrooms, yet, but… ehhhh…”

“Just don’t, dude. Just let me go in myself.”

“Uh, hehe.” Jenny chuckled nervously. “So, let’s get on with the adventure, shall we? And stop talking about creepy stuff?”

“Strange anomaly detected: unregistered glitch appears to be non-hostile.”

“Boly, this is Eddy! He’s a friend!” Miko said.

“Boly?”

The group took a moment to brief Eddy on the mission. “Okay… but even though you worked for Hinobi, you’re not technically affiliated with them, anymore. So, wouldn’t the developers have control over the MCP? I feel like it would be their jobs to fix this mess.”

“I am unable to connect with President Kayaba or the Hinobi network. Only User Me_K.O. can serve as my vessel.”

“It can’t really be helped.” Quill shrugged. “So, didn’t Sector Hinobi say they were going to Dragon Towers?”

“Yeah! Hopefully, they’ve already found Lexi. We should be able to get to other floors using the Elevator Tower over there.”

“Not exactly an organic way to traverse an open world.” Eddy commented.

“It saves us the trouble of getting lost.” Jenny argued. “Let’s go!”

Many other players were entering and exiting the tower, with Sector Q becoming mixed among them. There were actually dozens of elevators within the tower, allowing groups of different players to travel to different floors without having to make too many stops. Sector Q entered their own elevator and studied the directory. “It’s on Floor 13… right then!” Miko happily pushed the number on the controls.

As the elevator rose skyward, the opposite wall became transparent, providing them a view of the sinking valley. They bid farewell to the Land of Beginnings, darkness enveloping them as they transitioned floors. They began zooming past the 2nd floor, Urbus, which appeared to be a vast canyon where a town was situated on a platform in the middle of the chasm. The third floor was the Prism Desert, a vast desert with pyramids of many sides, and even some upside-down floating pyramids. The 4th floor, Rovia, was a lava land with a Roman colosseum.

“Virtual or not, this place is pretty epic.” Jenny said. “But like, our real universe is pretty epic, too. Why would people need to play this game when they could have a real adventure?”

“Because this world helps people feel strong.” Quill answered. “They can go wherever they want without worrying about dying. It’s like when people wanna become a KND operative. They think fighting villains and having adventures is fun, but then they get to the hard parts. That’s why playing games is safer… or at least it was supposed to be.”

“Heh…I guess you’re right.” Miko said, remembering what Lexi last told her.

Gun Gale

The elevator stopped at Floor 23 as Sector SA stepped out. A drastic change from the fantastical first floor, Gun Gale was a muddy brownish city mostly filled with tough and dark-looking figures with guns strapped to belts. “Oooooo!” Nagisa drawled, drawn in by the atmosphere.

“I know you like watching people kill each other on TV, but don’t look like such a fanboy.” Goombella said with a reproving stare. “Frankly, this place makes me uncomfortable.”

“So, what does your friend look like?” Morg asked.

“I mean, I don’t know what Millium’s avatar is,” Fie replied, “but she has light-blue hair in real life. Sort of like you, Nagisa. Her screen name is Oz73.”

“How’re we supposed to find her in all this?” Nagisa asked.

“Just have to look around, I guess.” Killua figured. “But since we’re not in avatars, I’m sure other operatives will recognize you. You guys are famous, right?”

“For better or for worse.” Goombella replied.

“I hate to suggest this, but perhaps we should split up.” Morgiana said. “We are a little too colorful to be traveling together. But how would we keep in contact?”

“We should each have friend codes.” Killua brought up his screen. “If we exchange those, we can contact each other.”

“Sounds good.” Nagisa agreed. “But just to be safe, it may be better to divide in pairs. How about… Morg hangs with Fie and Killua with Goombella? That’ll mix things up!”

“Should’ve known you’d suggest that.” Goombella glared. “But why’re you going alone?”

“’Cause I’m the stealthiest!” he grinned. “I already have some pistols, so I can at least blend in.” He indicated the guns on his belt. “Let’s call each other if something happens. Otherwise, we’ll meet up back here in, say, two hours?”

“Just be careful, Nagisa.” Morg cautioned.

The five split into separate directions, unsure who to really look for or even what to do afterwards. Being trapped in this game, they had no real control of the situation, no idea if the operatives outside were working to save them, and unsure if defeating the 100 bosses would really save their selves. For now, it would feel more comforting to regroup with more friends.

Nagisa walked by an escalator and glanced up it… His brows perked up, seeing a girl with lightish blue hair, wearing green, white, and dark attire. She appeared to be aiming a sniper rifle across the town. Nagisa ventured up the escalator and approached her calmly. “Excuse me?” He tapped her shoulder.

“Ah!” She gasped, turning around. “Hey, don’t just sneak up on someone while they’re sniping!”

“I’m sorry! I was just wondering… is your screen name Oz73?”

“No, it’s Sinon.”

“Heh, okay.” Nagisa blushed awkwardly. “I’m looking for someone with blue hair, so I thought…”

“Your hair is blue.”

“I meant someone else!”

Sinon chortled. The girl looked over Nagisa’s attire. “So, I guess you were on Floor 1? You seem a little ‘normal’ for this game.”

“Yeah. I was supposed to be a Sheikah, now I’m just… plain old Nagisa!”

“Hmhm…” Sinon glanced to the guns on his hip. “I guess this is your first time at Gun Gale? Those seem like default models.”

“You’re right on the mark~” Nagisa joked. “…But listen, after that announcement, what are people actually doing on this floor? They’re not playing against each other, are they?”

“No… all bouts were cancelled as soon as that happened.” Sinon replied somberly.

“I don’t suppose this game sells non-lethal bullets?”

“Not as far as I know. No one was supposed to die for real, so the devs had no reason to program those.”

“Well, that sucks…” Nagisa’s eyes fell a tad.

Sinon made a small smile. She could sense the worry in this girl’s eyes, though her calm voice and tone helped to mask her emotions. Sinon was already feeling a slight kinship with her. “Maybe I could help find your friend. I spend a lot of time here, so I know the town fairly well.”

“It’s actually someone I don’t know, I’m searching for them for a different friend. But, yeah! I don’t mind some help! I don’t really have any clues, so do you know a place people like to go?”

“Yeah, come with me.”

Though Nagisa decided to go alone, it felt nice to have a new companion to hang with. “Oh, my name’s Nagisa, by the way.” He said as they began traveling. “Though my screen name is SK101.”

“What’s that stand for?”

“Silent Kill. I have a thing for assassins~”

“Oh. Uhh…”

“Don’t get the wrong idea! I’d never kill anyone for real, I just like the aesthetic of it.”

“Hehe, I figured that. With wanting non-lethal ammo and stuff.”

“Yeah… Do you think we could escape if we beat the 100 bosses?”

“I don’t really know. I’m still trying to process this whole thing. It just… happened out of nowhere.”

“It always happens out of nowhere.” Nagisa sighed. “But as soon as we get enough people together, we’re gonna take that Infinite down!”

“Really? That’s a bold statement.” Sinon narrowed her eyes non-believingly.

“Hey, my friends and I are pretty strong. Especially my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?”

“Yep! What, I don’t look cool enough to have one?”

“No, just a little surprised.” Sinon smiled. “But lucky you!”

A group of men seemed to whistle at them as they walked by. “Check it out, Sinon’s got a cute little friend~”

“Can’t wait to see her covered in blue~”

“Ew.” Nagisa cringed, not even sure what he was implying. “I see you have your own fanclub…”

“Ugh, there are too many creeps in this game. Half of them are probably my subscribers. Dirty perverts.”

“Yeah, but…” Nagisa leaned closer to her, “don’t get mad at me for saying this, but your shorts are kinda short. I can see your…”

Putting the rest of his sentence together, Sinon flushed. “What?!”

“I’m sorry! I just glanced for a bit and thought you should…”

“Why hasn’t anyone else told me?! I swear, I wanna… hey, come over here.” Sinon pulled Nagisa into an alley. “S-Stand guard while I fix this, don’t let anyone see.” She began trying to pull her shorts up, much to Nagisa’s discomfort. “Er, does it look any better?”

“Uh…n-no?” Nagisa looked for a second before looking away. “Why didn’t you design yourself with more clothes?”

“Because I wanted some mobility! My friend made the design for me, but he never drew… never mind. Listen, just stay close to me while we walk.” Sinon pulled Nagisa’s arms as she resumed their walk, keeping him close to her back.

“U-Um, this feels really weird!” Nagisa flushed brighter. “We only just met each other, I don’t think…”

“I don’t like it either, but I’d rather have a girl protecting my ass than have guys look at it.”

“Y-You know I’m a guy, too, right?”

Sinon stopped with a start. Nagisa was… a guy? He did seem kind of flat-chested. He also said he had a girlfriend, but Sinon just assumed… A guy? And she was using him to hide her…

Not far away

“And that’s why I chose to work under CP0.” Fie concluded her story to Morgiana.

“He sounds pretty important to you.” Morg replied, silently awed by the story. “I can relate to that… I still don’t fully trust you, but I don’t think you’re lying.”

“Always keep your guard up. That’s the first rule as a jaegar.”

“DWOOOOH!”

They heard a cry and faced ahead. Nagisa was kneeling on the ground before a cyan-haired girl, gripping his aching head. “NAGISA!” Morg dashed over and grabbed Sinon’s shoulder, forcibly turning her around. “Who are you?! Why did you hurt him?!”

“W-Wait, who are you?!”

“Eh heh heh heh…” Nagisa laughed weakly. “Maybe we should explain ourselves.”

Floria

Lexi found an outdoor inn on this floor and decided to rest there until the sun rose. She didn’t expect too much danger in a flower field, but exploring in sunlight felt safer. The main plaza of Floria had a fountain in the center of some paved roads. She left the plaza and begun to explore the fields, the flowers soft and welcoming on her feet. There were many other players who took the form of Harnitans, Kokiri, or Floro Sapiens, though Lexi watched her step for any small-size players. The relaxing atmosphere of this floor was helping to relieve the hearts of the players after the dreadful announcement.

Lexi saw a tree of flower-shaped fruits, smiling at their exotic-looking taste. “Hyah!” She kicked the tree to make one fall… but instead, a large bee, the size of herself, flew out, looking cartoonishly adorable, but angry. “Uh-oh.” Lexi ran as the bee began pursuing. She wasn’t about to engage that monster with direct karate. She tried to shoot lightning backward, but her weak bolts were unable to land a good shot. She kept glancing back to determine the bee’s position, but before she knew it, she was running toward a ‘girl’ in a black kimono. “Whoa! Sorry!” Lexi tried to run around her. The girl narrowed her gaze on the bee and bent up a swarm of flower petals to slice the bee to pieces. “Huh…” Lexi stopped and calmed herself after witnessing this. “Thanks.”

“If you’re not going to fight, don’t bother coming out in the field.” Kalluto said, walking away.

“Uh! Did you see the size of that thing, it would’ve stabbed right through me!”

“It’s just an insect. There are plenty like that in my world.”

“Well, where I’m from, they’re tiny, and they’re still terrifying.”

“Don’t waste my time.”

Lexi puffed her cheeks in frustration. She stomped after the boy. “But aren’t you worried about dying?”

“I’ve abandoned that fear long ago.”

“Hah, don’t you talk big? How old are you again?”

“I’m turning 11 in May.”

“Pfft, then you’re younger than me. You must be a heavy gamer to act like that.”

“Do you need something?” Kalluto turned to her with a glare.

“Well, I…” Lexi glanced down and twisted a foot on the ground. “Not really. I’m just kind of waiting for my sister to fix this game or something.”

“Pathetic. If you can’t rely on yourself, you won’t survive.” He kept walking.

Lexi fumed and stomped after him. “What, are YOU planning to take out 100 bosses?”

“If that is my test, so be it. My instructors wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Instructors?” Lexi cocked a brow as she looked over Kalluto’s Japanese attire. She then pieced it together: “So, you’re a student, too!”

“Yes. I was sent in here as part of an assignment.”

“Man, that sounds cool. Hey, maybe we should help each other then! It would be great if I could improve my karate while I’m in here.”

“The first step is not running away from bugs.”

“Ugh, fine! Next time, I’ll show you what I’m made of!”

“I would hope so. I received a tip on where the boss is located. We’re heading in its direction now. It’s not my fault if you die to it.”

Lexi cringed in worry. Though she had gotten stronger thanks to Maddy’s training, she was unsure if she was ready for such a big task. “...Well, I’m still not gonna let you go alone. You’re still my junior, so I have to bail you out if it gets too dangerous.”

“I’ll bet.”

“My name’s Lexi, by the way. What’s yours?”

“Kalluto.”

“Cool! Alright, Kalluto, let’s show this boss what we karate girls can do!”

“I’m a boy.”

Lexi froze in place. “Oh…well, cute avatar!” She hurried back after him. (Play “The Honeyhive” from Mario Galaxy!)

Stage 2: Floria

Mission: Defeat the boss of the flowers! It sounds more epic than it feels!

Lexi followed Kalluto up a hill, but it shortly ended at a ledge before a chasm. They jumped onto a giant floating flower, but the next one was further away. Kalluto used his bending to draw it in and fill the gap between them and the following flowers. The giant bees called Bzzaps flew to attack them. Lexi dodged left and dealt a karate chop to the bee, knocking it onto the flower, followed by a stomp that derezzed the bug. “Hey! I got it!”

Kalluto had bent petals up to destroy the others, ignoring Lexi and jumping the flowers. Lexi huffed and jumped to catch up. They landed on a hill with some large dandelions. Kalluto picked one up as a breeze carried him across the valley. Lexi struggled to pick one out herself, but- “Whoa!” was taken by surprise when she finally did and was forcibly carried away. The spores on the dandelions were breaking off as the flowers were sinking. Kalluto jumped to another floating dandelion, but Lexi saw one that was a bit too high. She hurriedly climbed to the top of hers and barely made the jump, grabbing the tip of the higher flower. She had to steer the dandelion around floating spiky plants before jumping to another dandelion. Afterwards, an updraft carried her up to a safe platform where she could jump off.

“Interestingly, Floria is the name of one of Hyrule’s great lakes.” Kalluto thought aloud.

“Wait, you’re from Hyrule?”

“Yep.”

“Cool! I’m from Coruscant, but I moved to Earth last-”

“Passive comments don’t require conversation.”

Some large flowers with multiple buds aimed at Kalluto, spinning and shooting seeds like a minigun. Kalluto nimbly dodged them with Paper Art and went to slice the first one with his fan. As he targeted the second flower, Lexi frantically dodged the bullets of another, ultimately just running away. That flower decided to target Kalluto, who used Iron Body to defend from its bullets. “Dude, your skin is hard as steel!”

“It’s called Iron Body.” Kalluto Shaved up to slice the flower.

“What kind of style is that?”

“Rokushiki. I don’t know why you assumed I was a karate student.” Kalluto continued along the road.

“Could I have given myself that in the game?”

“There are no options to equip yourself with advanced martial arts. That’s because any person can learn these techniques.”

“You have to teach me!”

“No.”

The duo reached a chasm where small flower platforms were shifting up and down, with bladed, fan-like flowers serving to impede their jumps. Kalluto couldn’t seem to bend the evil flowers, so he only avoided them. He had covered the course far quicker than Lexi did, the older student taking her time to carefully plan the jumps. By the time Kalluto made it to a ledge on the other side, the world seemed to glitch. A giant lawnmower robot began carving through the flowers ahead of Kalluto, sending the petal bits flying back like blades. Kalluto simply caught the petals with a twirl and cast them into Egg Pawns that had spawned, slicing the robots. “Hey, wait for me!” Lexi raced to catch up, dodging the mower’s petals.

As they arrived at a garden of large dandelions, metal fans began spinning along the ground to slice the stems. The kids quickly grabbed a dandelion before they could ascend from their grasp. The dandelions were floating up to even larger fans, so they hurriedly jumped the dandelions before they could be skewered. By the time they could rest on some safe ground, the sky was steadily growing dark and cloudy. They could only walk a short distance before a lawnmower spawned behind them, the two switching into running mode. The ground ahead glitched and became a chasm with flower platforms, but that didn’t stop the lawnmower from floating and pursuing. Lexi nearly stumbled on the edge when it glitched while Kalluto outpaced her again. She was frantic to catch up, and after jumping some flowers, they had to jump against some floating beehives.

This caused a swarm of Bzzaps to fly out and pursue them. They landed in a wider field, where fans floated above to suck flowers in. Lexi ran past and under those fans to make them suck the bees in. They reached a chasm where dandelions were falling into a giant fan at a slowish, but scarily fast pace. “Hmmm…this should be a decent challenge.” Kalluto said as he began to jump and swing the dandelions with keen reflexes.

“W-Wait! WAIT!” Lexi screamed. “I can’t do that! C-Can’t you help me or something?”

“Then turn back the other way!” Kalluto called back.

“Come on, please? I can’t make it back by myself! I’ll pay you my allowance or something!”

“Sigh…” Kalluto rolled his eyes and decided to swing his way backward. “I suppose I could think of this as bodyguard training.” He let Lexi onto his back and began to swing the dandelions again. He nearly missed the jumps at some parts and had to use Moon Walk to readjust himself. He followed the dandelions skyward until he could jump to a safe ledge.

“Phew…thanks.” Lexi climbed off. “How were you air-jumping like that?”

“Moon Walk technique. Unfortunately, this game seems to have a stamina meter, so I can’t overuse it. Anyway, I doubt you’ll do much better at this next section, so hold on.”

Wind was blowing against them as Spring Flowers were caught in the draft. Kalluto jumped on the first, sprung upward, used Shave to push through the wind, landed on the next, and repeated the process. Spikes were blown as well, requiring Kalluto to drop beneath them before Shaving toward the springs. Parallel columns of vertical springs were about to pass overhead, so Kalluto quickly caught himself in them as they auto-Wall Jumped him to a walkway. He crossed the walkway to a safe ledge where he could set Lexi down. “By the time we get out of here, you better have enough allowance to pay me.”

“You don’t play with many friends, do you?” Lexi remarked as she followed him.

“Only partners if necessary. Though you’re not an ideal one.”

“Hmph. Well, it’s still better if we stick together. And I’d really fight a bit better if you taught me a few of those moves.”

“Do you even know how to concentrate your Personal Chi?”

“Well, yeah! I learned how to break cinderblocks in my karate class. I’ve been trying to learn the two basic Haki forms, but it kind of hurts my brain…hehe.”

“Then I don’t have time to teach you Rokushiki.”

“Come on, just one move?”

“I’m going to take out the boss for this level. Are you planning to fight or will I have to protect you?”

“Well, I’m gonna protect you, too!”

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes.’”

“Yes! …Er…yes to what?”

“Forget it.” (End song.)

Dragon Towers

Sector Q stepped off on Floor 13, their heads craning up to absorb the view of the Chinese city. The sky was eclipsed in twilight, while flames and lanterns provided light. “Oooo! Very authentic!” Jenny admired. “So, this is the martial arts floor?”

“Correct.” Boly replied. “There are numerous gyms, training halls, and arenas befit for any culture or style of combat.”

“If it’s any culture, why choose the Chinese aesthetic?” Eddy asked.

“President Kayaba put numerous cultures’ names in a hat and drew one. He selected China. I detect the Pure Heart’s presence toward the east, as well as those of numerous glitches. I recommend quickly searching for the Heart.”

“I recommend rolling up those dragon roads like a cool skatepark!” Jenny excitedly zoomed toward a dragon that sloped up from the plaza.

“Don’t start without us!” Miko and co. hurried after. (Play “Dragon Driftway” from Mario Kart!)

Stage 3: Dragon Towers

Mission: Find the Pure Heart!

Act 1: Dragon Road

The first road sloped up, curved down, then sloped up at a taller incline as fireworks launched from the distance and exploded against the road. The operatives maneuvered around the impact points, the road becoming straight once they were at the top. Dragon snake robots, whose bodies were made of segmented balls, circled around the road and spat fireballs with each loop, but Eddy raised his new sword and bravely leapt to chop the first robot’s segments off, while Quill ran to set fire to the second one. The following chunk of the road glitched out of existence, with only a series of Ring Dragons to lead the way across, along with stacked blocks in-between. Each dragon had a hammer Pixl (Cudge) above it. Miko had to jump and bounce on the first dragon, with each bounce destroying one of the dragon’s segments, whittle down the block stack with her hammer, and jump to the next dragon before that one ran out. She repeated the process three times before she could land on the other side and destroy a black-and-red, glitchy generator.

The dragon road repaired as Miko’s teammates could catch up. The road sloped down and ended over a pit, with several horizontal fireworks crossing the gap toward a plaza area. “Me_K.O., please direct your attention toward that Pause Switch.” Boly indicated a floating, yellow-and-blue clock at the edge of the road. “This device can Pause the game for a short time. It may assist in crossing this chasm.”

“Yay, I’m a timebender!” Miko went to hit the switch, freezing the world save for their group. They jumped the frozen fireworks carefully before landing on the plaza. “Hey! Zahra, is that you?”

The Muslim Hinobi operative was charring Egg Pawns with pink flames. “Miko! You caught up!”

“Where’s everyone else? Did you find Lexi?”

“No, we’re still looking for her. But we think we found the Pure Heart.”

“Really?”

“Look at that screen!”

Zahra pointed to a screen displaying a blonde, muscular guy in blue pants, laughing and raising a red heart above him. “That’s Rumble McSkirmish.” Miko acknowledged. “He’s from the game Fight Fighters, everyone knows… wait! That’s the Pure Heart!”

“Rumble is the boss of this level. His dungeon is the Tower of 100, where players have to fight 99 other warriors before facing him. It looks like he’s giving the Pure Heart away as a special prize, so Mitch and Five hurried to the tower.”

“The Tower of 100 basically sounds like a miniature version of this game.” Quill said.

“Zahra, keep looking for Lexi. We’ll head for the tower and meet up with them.”

“You got it! You can get there if you take this road.”

Sector Q followed the road in question, seeing giant flaming wheels rolling their way. The group hid in a gap in the road while the first wheel passed by. They ran further and saw a cracked part of the ground, which Carmine blew open with bombs so the group could hide in the gap. They continued after the wheel passed, but as the world glitched, a large series of wheels appeared ahead. “Down here!” Eddy yelped, jumping off the right side to find a walkway along the side of the dragon. The group joined before the wheels could crush them. Miko went ahead to jump some platforms and find a Laddie. The ladder Pixl stretched up to a platform in the air. Miko climbed up and found a Pause switch. She called her friends up before using the switch to Pause the flame wheels. They could land on and run up the wheels before they could branch off to a road on the left.

A huge, red Thwomp was shifting right and left. It would crush against a wall on the left, but to the right was a platform across a chasm. They had to jump against the Thwomp when it shifted right, kicking off with the momentum to land on the platform. Another Thwomp bounced up and down, so they used it to launch them up, having to immediately bounce some Ring Snakes to reach the next platform. There was a Pause Switch on the head of a Thwomp. They held off on touching it, but held on as the Thwomp fell downward. Just as it crashed, two other Thwomps threatened to pin them—Miko flipped the switch to Pause them. The group Wall Jumped the Thwomps to get on top. Either Thwomp would return to separate roads that curved down to the same plaza.

A horde of XANA Krabs waited in the plaza, surrounding a round Pixl with blue spikes. “Me_K.O., that Pixl will enable an invincibility barrier that can deflect attacks for 20 seconds.”

“Miko, can I have it?!” Eddy exclaimed.

“Be my guest!” They both ran onto the plaza as the Krabs began shooting. Miko seized the Barry and transferred it into Eddy. As a spiked shield formed around him, he spun to deflect the Krabs’ lasers back at them. The others ran to contribute to the damage, ensuring every Krab was destroyed. As they ventured up a new road, Miko collected another Barry, using it to deflect the fireworks fired by robots on the towers. The road sloped by a tower, where they could view into one of the training halls. A pigtailed human girl was throwing kicks at a muscular Glomourian.

“Why would anyone be fighting if they know they’ll die for real?” Eddy asked.

“On the contrary, being KO’ed in the training halls will not boot players out of the game.” Boly said. “It seems players are still able to battle in safety. However, be mindful that being killed in the Tower of 100 will result in the worst.”

The road allowed them onto the roof above that hall. An Egg Bishop hovered over the edge and would conjure an endless horde of XANA Hornets. Eddy sliced the Hornets down while Quill shot and burned the Egg Bishop. They traveled around the building and could climb some fire escape stairs to the next roof. They could now see inside of a dining room where people naturally ate with chopsticks. They were being served by a blue-haired, pigtailed girl who had a Nimbi avatar. “Well, Ah suppose if Ah’m goin’ to be trapped in here, I have plenty o’ time to improve mah cooking.” She said in a country accent.

“I’m sure other operatives are around.” Raleigh said, enjoying her meal alongside some Shy Guys. “If only we had a way to contact the outside.”

“Did you say you were a KND operative?” Jenny asked.

“Huh?” Raleigh turned. “Hey, I think I recognize you guys! You are…?”

“Sector Q.” Quill replied. “You’re one of the rich kids, right?”

“Carol figured out how to upload avatars without logging into the game directly.” Eddy explained. “We can stay in contact with operatives on both sides!”

“Cool! I guess that means Carol’s still outside. So, do they have a plan to fix this mess?”

They quickly briefed Raleigh on their mission. “Okay, I think I understand. Let’s exchange Friend Codes so we can keep in touch. I’ll try to be on the lookout for Carol’s avatar, too.”

“I’ll tell her you’re still here.” Eddy replied.

“Um, excuse me?” the chef spoke up. “If it ain’t too much trouble, could you tell Sector JP I’m trapped in here, too? Mah name’s Megumi. I’m sort of a friend of theirs.”

“You got it! Also, is that a Thwomp in there?” Eddy noticed the sleeping Thwomp behind Megumi. They curiously walked around to the side—the Thwomp woke up and launched into them, shooting them across the chasm to another road. A wide plaza lay before a great tower 100 floors tall, and the dragon’s body led straight onto it.

There appeared to be a brawl taking place on the plaza… but Miko first recognized a friend standing at the edge of the road. “Five!”

“Meeks! Heh, you sort of came at an awkward time. Mitch got in a fight.”

“A fight…?” They returned attention to the brawl they had just noticed. (End song.)

Mitch appeared to be fighting a shorter, tan boy with dark hair covering one eye, an orange top, baggy white shorts, and bare feet. Mitch raised his arms to block a flurry of punches, but suffered a kick to the stomach. Once Mitch’s guard dropped, the boy jumped to kick his chin, but Mitch threw a punch with his Hinobi Glove and knocked the boy down. “Hey!” Miko yelled as the boy got up and resumed attacking. She rushed up to grab his shoulders. “Why are you attacking-” The boy kicked Miko off.

“This jerk says I can’t go into the Tower of 100!” King Kazma shouted. “I won the preliminary matches, I won the right to go in there!”

“And I say it isn’t safe!” Mitch stated. “I’m an official Hinobi officer and this tower is scheduled for mandatory de-glitching.”

“Bullcrap! You just wanna defeat the boss yourself!” Kazma rolled behind Mitch and tried to kick, but Mitch grabbed his foot and tossed him aside.

“Mitch, you don’t have to be so hard on him.”

“But he attacked me! Besides, Miko, we think one of those Pure Hearts is-”

“I already know about that. But why are you fighting this kid over it?”

“Because only one competitor can fight in the tower, so it has to be me. After all, I AM Mitch Williams~”

“More like Dick Williams!” Kazma shouted. “You really DO just want the prize!”

“That’s not the only reason! I really am detecting dangerous glitches around the tower. My team is going to deal with them while I fight the battles.”

“Why can’t YOU deal with them while I fight?!”

“Because I’m a pro, Kazma. And you’re just a brat who picks fights without thinking.”

“Wait!” Eddy yelled. “Did you just say ‘Kazma’? As in, KING Kazma?”

“Yep.” Five replied. “Believe it or not, that’s what he really looks like.”

“Uh, hello?” Jenny called. “Who is this Kazma guy, I’ve never heard of him.”

“He’s a gamer who always challenges the most popular gamers!” Eddy announced happily. “I’m one of his subscribers, he’s the best!”

“You think so, eh?” Kazma asked drolly.

“Yeah! I totally get what you mean about popular gamers! They’re the reason underrated games get such a bad rep, always following the objectively better or newer titles, and they have no eye for classics!”

“Exactly!” Kazma threw up his arms in exasperation. “At least someone gets it!”

“Great, you can bond over it out here.” Mitch stated. “I’m going in.”

“No you are freaking not!” Eddy grabbed his arm. “If he won the right to go in, then you have no right to stop him.”

“Is he even a KND operative?”

“Not really…” Kazma replied.

“You do know that if your HP reaches zero, you’ll die, right? This may be a videogame, but it might as well be real. You don’t have the training for this sort of thing. Especially when you’re dressed about as well as that hillbilly.”

He had referred to Carmine, who shirked sheepishly. “Overalls are cute.”

“Oh, yeah! I guess you were on the first floor, huh?” Miko figured. “Here, let me fix your avatar!” She flashed a light over Kazma, who suddenly grew to Eddy’s height and morphed into his white rabbit form with a red jacket.

“Huh?!” He stared at himself in awe. “My avatar! It’s back!”

“There’s the Kazma I remember!” Eddy smiled.

“Yeah! Now I feel ready!” Kazma thrusted his fists in eagerness. “You still gonna stand in my way, Mitch?”

“You should still be the same strength with or without your avatar! It doesn’t change the fact that-”

“I would like to interject.” Boly emerged in its misty diamond form. “Mitch Williams is technically not the most capable of challenging the Tower of 100.”

“What?!”

“Yeah, suck it!” Kazma smirked.

“User Me_K.O. is technically the most capable.”

“WHAT?!”

“M-Me?” Miko blushed. “I mean, I kick butt in fighting games, but…”

“Indeed, your physical capabilities shall enable you to conquer the 100 fighters. You will also have further aid from the Pixls if need be.”

“I don’t care what you say!” Kazma shouted. “I won the prelims, so I’m going to battle! You can’t stop me!” The rabbit turned and dashed for the tower entrance.

“Now, wait a sec!” Mitch tried to stop him, but Kazma was already determined. He was up the stairs and gone behind the tower gates. “Damn! He’s going to get himself killed!”

“Now you can see why he’s so infamous.” Five figured.

“We shouldn’t have to worry.” Eddy said. “He’s a pro at fighting games, so if anything, he’s the best option.”

“We need to back him up from the glitches!” Miko reminded. “And be ready to pull him out in case his HP starts dropping. Come on!” The group rushed to the tower.

Tower Boss Room

“Hwah! I sense, that a challenger, has entered my chamber!” Rumble McSkirmish (from Gravity Falls) announced in a battle-ready pose. “But wait! You haven’t cleared any of the 99 floors! Have you used the forbidden art of Cheat Codes?!”

A muscular, grinning, crowned monster had entered the room. Love Machine narrowed its eyes on Rumble and cracked its knuckles.

Chapter Text

Instead of writing 100 brief battles, I decided to write a more fun level idea that isn’t as exhausting for my brain!

King Kazma shoved open the tower gates and marched into the first floor. Awaiting him was a younger boy in a blue ripped shirt and black shorts, his teeth grit. “I am Kid McSkirmish, the guardian of the first floor! I won’t let some amateur walk into Dad’s tower!”

“Whatever, kid. Let’s just get started!” (Play “Battle Time” from Super Paper Mario!)

Act 2: Tower of 100

The gates sealed just as Sector Q made it up the stairs. “Crud! We’re locked out!” Eddy exclaimed.

“Glitches detected on the roofs!” Boly alerted.

“To the roofs!” Jenny declared.

They hurried around the right side and followed a staircase up to the 2nd floor. A troupe of Egg Pawns were ready to shoot into that floor’s window, but the operatives smashed them before they could get the chance. Kazma would win his battle and come up to the 2nd floor, so the team jumped some platforms to the 3rd floor. Ring Snakes flew about the air, spitting fireballs. Eddy chopped them to pieces and released a Laddie. Miko easily formed a ladder to the 4th floor, where a series of Thwomps were attempting to smash into the room. Miko timed and dodged through all the Thwomps, making it around the tower to find a Barry. She used her barrier to bounce the Thwomps away as the spikes made them derez. Kazma reached this floor by the time she was finished.

There was one more Thwomp that appeared below the edge, thrusting up and down. They jumped on as it launched them to a spring, which bounced them to the 5th floor. Several Egg Mages would channel magic over the room and drain Kazma’s HP, so Carmine threw bombs at the airborne robots and destroyed them. “Miko, can you refill my bombs?” Miko nodded and flashed the glove on her friend. Afterwards, they had to jump some Ring Snakes to the 6th floor (though it seemed the snakes were otherwise harmless). Boly detected Snipebots on distant towers, but also alerted them to a Pixl nearby. They broke open a vase and found a round, green Pixl designed like a crosshair. Its name was fittingly Crosser.

Miko gave the Pixl to Quill as a rifle formed for him. He could lock on the distant mechs and shoot them down. They could afterwards Wall Jump two pillars to the 7th floor. There were several vases placed around with robots hidden in a few. Carmine’s Observation Haki could sense where the robots were and tossed bombs into those vases, destroying the mechs. They had to take a Barrel Cannon route to the 8th floor, having to shoot to the next ones with good timing as the cannons rotated. The world glitched as the giant fire wheels from before began dropping and rolling down the roof. The kids dodged past the wheels until they could find a ladder, leading to a platform with a Pause Switch. The next roof’s edge was blocked with fire, so they had to Pause the wheels and jump across them to find the way onto the 9th floor roof.

Boly alerted them to small turrets hidden inside the actual combat ring. They would begin shooting at Kazma once the fighter arrived to challenge the next foe. Quill noticed a small hole in the wall and drove his RC car inside. He shot the car’s small turret to take out the mechs once they stuck out. Destroying them all seemed to free a small, round Pixl with blue and green sun rays. “Me_K.O., this Pixl is designed to reduce the dimensions of your avatar.”

“So, it shrinks us? Let’s find a place to use it.” They jumped some platforms to the 10th floor. There were no apparent glitches, but Kazma’s opponent appeared to be a tiny samurai. It was swift in dodging Kazma’s stomps while leaping to land strong hits. “Aha! Kazma, have this!” Miko transferred the Dottie Pixl through the window and shrank Kazma. Taken off guard at first, he regained himself and dueled with the samurai on equal ground. After KOing the fighter, Kazma grew back to normal size.

“Hmph…thanks.” he said before hurrying to the 11th floor. The world glitched as the roof scattered into several panels, one of them carrying the group away from the tower. There were robots stationed on some platforms, shooting into the ring, so Miko quickly jumped around to knock the robots off. She then destroyed a generator to restore the roof. A normal ladder led them to the 12th floor: inside the ring, the floor was covered in spikes, which Kazma’s gangster-looking opponent could apparently walk on. Miko ran around the roof and found a Carrie inside a vase. She sent the Carrie to Kazma, who could ride the resulting platform around the spikes and defeat the gangster.

The spikes retracted, and as Kazma proceeded, he smashed his own vase and freed another Carrie. “At least that’s one favor repaid.” The group could use Carrie to jump some spiked platforms to the 13th floor. They gasped at seeing a bunch of dynamites aligned around the ring, but their lit fuses were all different lengths.

“There’s one over here that’s about to go off!” Carmine ran as Eddy followed, the boy using his sword to cut the short fuse. Carmine led him to the next one quickest to detonate, and the process repeated as her Haki, combined with her pyrotechnic knowledge, ultimately prevented the floor from exploding. The 14th floor had some Camerons, the turtle bots shooting cannons in the ring while otherwise shielding their selves. Miko located a Thudley and used Ground Pound to press a Quake Switch, flipping the turtles upside-down as her team destroyed them. On Floor 15, a Rhinotank was zooming around the roof in evasion. The kids went separate ways to corner the robot and strike all at once. The Rhinotank freed a Dashell.

However, as soon as Miko grabbed it, the world glitched as they felt their selves become completely immobile. There was a sudden fizziness before everything returned to normal. “Hey, where did Kazma go?!” Miko panicked.

“I am detecting numerous glitches along the dragon that snakes around the tower.” Boly alerted. “With multiple signatures on Floor 50 in particular.”

“Wait, are you saying Kazma is up there?! How’d he get up that fast?”

“Finally, I can move again!” Eddy shouted.

“Move? What do you mean?” Quill asked.

“My computer froze for, like, the LONGEST time! …Hey, where did Kazma go?”

“Huh? Did we just get frozen in time without realizing it?!”

“And Kazma made progress without us!” Jenny shouted. “Miko, the Pixl!” The skater absorbed the Dashell and raced up the small dragon road that started on their roof and snaked several floors up and around the tower. She kicked down several Egg Pawns, then had to bounce up a stairway of Ring Snakes. She duck-slid under some flamethrowers, then stylishly rolled under some Thwomps. At Floor 45, she hit a Spring Pad chain that led her up to Floor 50. Five XANA Krabs were shooting at Kazma through the window, but Jenny kicked and sent them all off the roof. Unfortunately, the game glitched: Kazma disappeared, but Jenny’s team had caught up.

“Oh, not again! Guys, I think I paused again!”

“Glitches detected on Floor 75!”

“Hey, there’s a Pause Switch!” Miko pointed. “Looks like it’s our turn to do the pausing!” She leapt to hit the switch and freeze time.

“Leave the rest to me!” Jenny rolled up the next dragon road, but it thinned into a dragon rail. Keeping her speed, the rail curved vertically as she jumped off it onto another, which continued curving up the tower. She jumped spiked portions, then leapt off to another rail before that one ended. Jenny leapt off on Floor 75 as the Pause wore off. Egg Mages were about to drain Kazma’s HP, but Jenny flew around and pierced them all with her roller-bladed kicks. Alas, the world glitched: Jenny’s team caught up while Kazma had gone ahead. “Gah, dang it! Are there any more power-ups?”

“Pixl detected on Floor 99.” Boly answered.

“I can sense a threat on that building over there!” Carmine pointed. “I think it’s a sniper!”

“Uuuuugh! You three, with me!” Jenny threw Miko, Carmine, and Quill onto her shoulders and raced up the next dragon road. There were some firework robots on platforms, so Carmine chucked bombs to blow them up. There were gaps in the road, but there were ziplines overhead, so Jenny jumped as Quill grabbed and zipped them across. The road curved onto the roof at Floor 83, where they had to speed past giant flame wheels. The following dragon road would end at a series of Thwomps, having to ride them as they rose up and momentum-jump to the next ones. A leftward Thwomp launched them onto the 90th floor.

Each of the next roofs had a spring to bounce them to the next, with Quill having to shoot down the XANA Hornets protecting each one. Once they had finally reached Floor 99, where Kazma was battling a fighter named Suggesica, Miko grabbed the Crosser Pixl and passed it to Quill. “It’s over there!” Carmine pointed to the distant tower in question. Quill locked onto the Snipebot and shot it down before it could land its shot on Kazma. The fighter in question was able to defeat his foe as well. (End song.)

“Phew…that was a close one.” Kazma sighed.

“I’ll say!” Jenny shouted. “Can’t you at least wait on the stairs while we take out these enemies threatening your life?”

“How’s your HP doing, anyway?” Quill asked.

“There’s a refill right here.” Kazma walked up to a table and grabbed a bottle of juice. It restored his nearly-depleted bar to full health.

“Dude, if you could barely beat that one, you sure you’re up for fighting the boss?”

“I’m not about to back down after making it this far! We gotta destroy all these bosses eventually, right? I’d rather risk my life here than keep lying helpless in my own room. Thanks for the help so far, but I got this.” The rabbit turned up the last flight of stairs.

“He is right.” Miko figured. “Right now, he’s the only one that can get the Pure Heart. We’d better make sure he wins.”

“Huff, huff, wait up, guys!” Eddy panted as he caught up. “Phew…I got tired of mashing the dash button.”

“Jerk.” Quill snapped.

“I gotta say, that was a cool idea for a level.” Jenny praised. “I was afraid it was gonna make puzzles out of all 100 floors and quickly lose its appeal, but instead, we ended off with a nice speedy section. The general idea lasted just long enough before it got boring.”

“Good point!” Eddy agreed. “This was good level design.”

“Is this really the time to admire level design?!” Quill shouted. “Move it!” (Play “Here Comes Trouble” from Banjo-Tooie!)

They raced to the 100th floor and viewed into the window. Rumble’s room had chandeliers, dragon pillars, a refrigerator, and some vases. Kazma was now face-to-face with the boss. “So! You have bested, all the others, and have to face me!”

“Darn right, Rumbi! Better say your prayers!”

“This is the sacred tower, of my ancestors! My comrades, and I, are sworn to protect it! I will not be defeated by y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-…”

“Looks like someone forgot his script.”

“I think he’s glitching.” Miko observed. “I guess that should make the fight a bit easier.”

“Is this the best the great Rumble has to offer?” Kazma grinned snarkily. “I guess I’m about to be the new Fight Fighter!” He leapt to swing a roundabout kick to Rumble’s head, but as soon as it made impact, the paw became glued to the head via a glitchy force. Kazma gasped and was able to pull it away, but watched as the foot shrank into its human form.

“Ha, ha. Ha, ha. Ha, ha…” Rumble seemed to laugh like a maniacal robot as he sported a wide, sharp-toothed grin. A pixelly black aura surrounded him as he punched at Kazma, the rabbit dodging and ducking before punching at Rumble’s stomach. The fighter grabbed his arm and struck Kazma with a glitchy force. “AAAAAHHH!”

The rabbit fully shrank into his human form before he was able to pull away, falling on his rear. Feeling naked and exposed once more, Kazma cowardly crawled backwards. He noticed his body fizzing and looked at his HP meter. “What?! I’m already at a quarter health?!”

“Foolish user.” Rumble said in a sinister voice. “I have absorbed the data of your avatar into my own. Rumble McSkirmish has made an unwilling deal with a dastardly demon and has mastered the dark arts! Once I become powerful enough, I will crush that puny heart!” He indicated the red Pure Heart on the pedestal.

“The heart you were giving away as a prize? Why do you wanna destroy that?”

“That should not matter, now that you are about to be derezzed!” Rumble stepped forward imposingly.

“W-Wait!” Kazma crawled back in fear. “This isn’t fair! That guy said we had to beat all the bosses!”

“So long as the true MCP exists, the ‘Treasure’ of the Lost World is in danger to it.”

“I think Infinite must’ve hacked that guy somehow!” Eddy deduced. “It sounds like he wants to destroy the Pure Hearts.”

“KAZMA! RUN!” Miko began pounding the window with her glove.

Kazma growled and pulled himself up. “There has to be a way to beat you! I can’t… run away now!”

“This is no game where you can lose a life and try again.” Rumble sneered. “Once you are crushed, you are crushed, FOR GOOD! The unworthy gamers do not get to survive! People who spend all day in their underwear do not know the ordeals of true combat. You cannot use virtual reality to simulate such a stimulation. This is your last chance to run away, boy.”

Kazma’s single exposed eye quivered with worry, his feet inching toward the exit. He hated to show such fear before an opponent, especially an A.I., but no opponent had ever threatened his life. He had to wonder if his real body was sweating with anxiety.

“I am detecting some Pixls approaching the boss chamber.” Boly said. “One has already arrived. The Pure Hearts emit a gravitational energy that draws them in. The Pixls may prevent the abilities of the glitch from taking effect.”

Miko spotted the Barry Pixl on a chandelier. “Kazma, grab that Pixl and bring it to me! I can use it to power you up!”

“Shouldn’t he just leave?” Quill suggested.

“If he did, then someone else would have to fight their way up the tower again.” Jenny said.

Kazma glanced to the spiked fairy on the ceiling. “I…I can’t run away! I survived all the way up here! I can’t look like a coward in front of these people!”

“Then you, will, perish!” Rumble declared. (Play “Monkey Red Face-Off” from Ape Escape!)

Boss fight: Rumble McSkirmish

Kazma ducked Rumble’s grab and dodged his kick, running to the wall that had a chandelier beside it. He Wall Jumped off and grabbed the chandelier, swinging the others as Rumble searched for him. “Ah! I have no, looking up, animation!”

Kazma reached the chandelier with Barry. He shook the Pixl off as it flew to Miko’s glove through the window. She transferred the power onto Kazma as a barrier formed around. Kazma charged at Rumble with spin attacks, the spikes stabbing him as he was bounced away. The possessed fighter jumped onto one of the dragon pillars, shooting condensed chi spheres. Kazma’s barrier could bounce them back, stunning the fighter. Kazma then shoved against the pillar and knocked Rumble down. “His dark chi appears to have waned!” Boly said. “Now’s your chance!”

Kazma punched and stomped the downed fighter with a relentless combo, but jumped away when Rumble regained himself. The chamber glitched as large blocks formed along the walls, blocking the window and giving little room to maneuver. Rumble began launching at Kazma with dash attacks, so he returned to evading. He backed against one of the blocks and tricked Rumble into ramming it, destroying it. He tricked Rumble into destroying the ones blocking the window, but it seemed the blocks would slowly respawn. Kazma saw a glowing block and had Rumble destroy it. The Cudge Pixl was freed, it flew to Miko, and she gave it to him. Kazma formed a giant hammer to smash Rumble as he charged him again.

The fighter recovered and leapt atop the giant blocks, beginning to shoot chi blasts. Kazma hammered and smashed some blocks as he ran leftward, but Kazma cut the corner and crushed the blocks ahead of him. He steadily limited Rumble to one block and knocked him off it. As the fighter landed on his back, Kazma hammered him against the floor. The Pixl wore off, but Rumble was vulnerable as Kazma lay the beatdown on him. He retreated before Rumble recovered. “Low on HP! Must, eat, FRIDGE!” He jumped to the refrigerator and hoisted it up, dumping all the contents down his throat. Kazma dashed up, leapt, and kicked the fridge away from his grasp. He half-expected to stub his toes big time, but his little foot seemed to possess the strength to accomplish the task.

A furious Rumble began jumping to down-punch him, and each time he struck the floorboards, a group of them would fling up like seesaws. Kazma ran and searched for a means to thwart this pattern. He saw a glowing floorboard and lured Rumble into flipping it. A Thudley was released as Miko allowed Kazma to use it. With the ability to Ground Pound, Kazma could flip the floorboards himself. He tricked Rumble onto one and flipped the fighter against a wall. He crashed down with a thud as Kazma Pounded him directly. The dark chi dispelled as Kazma beat him more directly, jumping away once Rumble recovered.

“No! You are cheating! Cheaters never win in legal contests!”

“Not true, unfortunately.” Kazma remarked. “Besides, there is no cheating when your life is on the line.”

“Then I will stop holding back! I will use my strongest attack, but first I must prepare!” It was then that a car dropped in the middle of the room. “I will gain power, by smashing this car!” Rumble began punching and crushing the car from all angles. “It sounds counterintuitive, but it works!”

Kazma wanted to run in and stop him, but feared Rumble would simply stop and grab him. The car was steadily crumbling as he searched for a solution. (Fittingly, the car was called the Crumble McSkirmish.) He noticed one of the vases glowing and ran to break it, releasing another Barry. He was allowed to absorb it just as Rumble finished breaking the car. “Stamina charge complete! Prepare for destruction!” With an explosion of aura, Rumble assaulted Kazma with a storm of punches, the boy hurriedly spinning his spiked barrier to deflect and endure the flurry. “Super Power Ninja Turbo Neo Ultra Hyper Mega Multi Alpha Meta Extra Uber Prefix COMBO!!!”

He could feel his bones rattling from the displaced force, his barrier inevitably shattering. Rumble’s dark chi disappeared as the fighter returned to attacking normally. Kazma recomposed and dodged his punches, throwing one at Rumble’s stomach. Rumble guarded the next low blow, but Kazma shifted aim at his head, followed by a swipe kick to knock Rumble down. Kazma tried to jump on his stomach, but Rumble flipped back up. He landed two punches to Kazma’s head, followed by a low punch, but Kazma caught his fist and threw him behind himself. Kazma ran for a flurry of punches to the chest, Rumble blocking them, but when Rumble swung a kick, Kazma jumped and kicked his head. The boy sprung like a rabbit and stamped Rumble’s head with both feet, knocking him down with depleted HP. Rumble’s body derezzed as pixels were absorbed into Kazma, restoring his own HP. (End song.)

“Wow… he won!” Miko beamed.

“I told you he was the best!” Eddy cheered. “Way to go, man!”

“Heh…” Kazma passed them a smile. His gaze was drawn to the red heart over the pedestal. He walked up to touch the heart… but it thrusted out a small force and flew out the window, breaking it open.

The heart flew a good distance over the town. The whole floor turned dark as some blue and pink platforms formed a trail to it. (Play “Forsaken City Cassette” from Celeste!)

The two colors were beeping in and out to a jaunty, 8-bit tune. Miko jumped the first blue one, then to the purple once it appeared. She timed her jumps carefully with the rhythm. She had to quickly Wall Jump two blue walls and land on a purple platform. This was followed by low, far-apart platforms that required well-timed long jumps. She landed on a normal walkway with a long row of Thwomps crushing it, divided into the same colors. Miko timed it to get under the Thwomps that would switch off, surviving their crushes. Afterwards, Miko had to journey up a staircase with the giant flaming wheels. These wheels were all blue and would blip on-and-off. She would step backwards when they were active, then run through when they switched off.

Miko arrived at a snaky dragon road segmented into these same colors. She progressed up it in the same, careful fashion. The road steadily thinned and led up to the Pure Heart. Once on the tip of the dragon’s tail, Miko leapt and seized the heart. There was an epic flash of light as a pixelly wave washed over the whole floor, erasing all the hostile glitches. An 8-bit victory fanfare played as the heart absorbed into Miko’s chest, shining a lovely red. The city’s normal light began to return as Miko was slowly lowered onto the ground. Both Sectors Q and Hinobi hurried over to her. (End song.)

“Uh…so, what the heck was that?” Kazma asked.

“That was a Pure Heart.” Miko answered. “We’re collecting these to fix the game.”

The group briefed him on the basic quest. “So, if we want to log out, we just have to find those eight hearts? We don’t have to beat the 100 bosses?”

“No, only eight of them.” Eddy shrugged. “I don’t know if it’ll work, but it’s a lot less of a load than the former.”

“It sure sounds a lot faster. In that case… you mind if I tag along with you guys?”

“Why?” asked Quill.

“Why not? I was already risking my life to get out of here. I just took on 100 floors of fighters, for crud’s sake!”

“Honestly, he’s totally right.” Eddy said. “We’re already looking for other operatives who are trapped in here, what’s wrong with adding a new teammate?”

“You just want him because you’re his fanboy!” Quill argued.

“So, what? Dude is strong!”

“I guess if we’re risking our lives, too,” Jenny figured, “other players have a right to do the same. But I still don’t know…”

“Whatever, I’m coming with you.” Kazma decided. “Partly because I owe you for helping me in the tower… but also, if I help save the world, maybe people will finally start to respect me!”

“People would respect you for being more respectful to your betters.” Mitch stated.

Kazma grit his teeth. “Well, you could learn some respect yourself, you dick!”

“Can we not start this again?” Five shirked.

Kazma turned away in a huff. “Maybe I shouldn’t come, if I have to hang out with this guy.”

“Hey, Boly, what other floors have Pure Hearts?” Miko asked.

“Pure Hearts detected on Floor 70, Floor 51, Floor 23, Floor…”

“Mitch, why don’t you guys search for the heart on Floor 70? We and Kazma can go to another one.”

“What about your sister, Miko?” Five asked.

Miko sighed, “I don’t know, maybe she isn’t even on this floor. But we have to fix this game for everyone. I just have to hope she hasn’t…”

“Well, maybe she’s hiding in an inn somewhere.” he said optimistically. “But we’ll keep an eye out.”

“Then I guess we’re off to Level 70.” Mitch decided, beginning to contact the others. “Playing these levels out of order is giving me some whiplash.”

“Skipping levels is what you wannabe pros do best.” Kazma remarked.

“Will you lot just take him and leave?”

“We might as well.” Quill shrugged. “Welcome to the team, Kaz.”

“Yeah!” Eddy cheered, inviting Kazma to a high-five. The words, King Kazma joined the party! appeared overhead.

The sectors wished each other luck as Sector Q proceeded back to the Elevator Tower. “It looks like you got the data back that Rumble took.” Miko noticed. “Want me to change you back into your avatar?”

“I’d rather he stay in his base form.” Quill said. “If he’s that infamous online, he’ll attract too much attention.”

“Whatever, shorty.” Kazma snapped.

“Hey, I’m the leader! I wouldn’t make too many comebacks, or I’ll kick you off.”

“Just don’t start with him.” Eddy suggested, leaning down to the shortened Kazma. “I won’t tell the whole story, but we lost one of our friends not too long ago. He was the first leader.”

“Oh…sorry.” Kazma bowed his head guiltily.

“It just goes to show this is a dangerous job.” Quill reminded. “Even when we feel confident, we could die in any battle.”

Kazma was hesitant for a moment. They really weren’t just average gamers like himself, they were used to this sort of threat. “I still won’t be afraid. In the virtual world, I’m still strong. So, I’ll do whatever I can to help fix this game.”

“You’re not too bad, kid.” Jenny smirked, rolling backwards. “Want us to get you some shoes though?”

“Hm…nah, I’m fine like this.”

“Haha!” Carmine laughed, agreeing with his sentiment.

“But there is something that I want.”

“Oh yeah? Anything on the customizer?” Miko shone the glove light on him.

“Let’s see… there we go!” Kazma selected a pair of headphones. Said pair formed around his neck. “Yeah! Now I feel complete! If we find any cassette tapes lying around, let’s pick ’em up. I like some good level music.”

“You are remarkably chill.” Quill said.

“And you’re dressed like a racer. I guess you’ve been to Level 51?”

“Isn’t that where one of the hearts is?” Miko asked.

“I haven’t really been there, what’s that floor?”

“It’s the racing floor.” Kazma smirked. “All the kart lovers fly there.”

Quill perked up. “Racing? Karts? Racecars?”

“Now he’s happy!” Carmine grinned.

“I think you need some cheering up, Quill.” Eddy said. “Why don’t we make that our next floor?”

“I’m way ahead of you on that!” Quill raced ahead to the tower.

“Better not keep him waiting!” Miko ran after. “We’re one heart down and seven to go, so let’s set a record!”

“I think the current record is one night!” Jenny yelled. “It’s too late to beat that!”

“Second place is good, too!” she returned as the friends shared a laugh.

Floria

Lexi and Kalluto swung a series of dandelions that ascended around a very tall, thick flower. The dandelions led them onto the gigantic petals, from which they could see into the bud. The bud contained its own, vast flower garden. The air was very windy at this height and the sky was ominously dark. “I sense a strong presence.” Kalluto glared. “Let’s see if it proves a decent test.”

“Can you teach me one of your moves first?”

“Ugh. Why are you still asking that? Perhaps if you prove yourself in this battle first…”

“Can I at least have a little preview?”

Kalluto sighed. In a flash, he zipped behind Lexi, the girl gasping and whipping around. “That move is called Shave.”

“You’re so fast! How do you do it?!”

“You have to focus a small burst of chi into your leg at a quick pace while simultaneously moving that leg as if to sprint. Make sure you lean your body in the direction you want to go.”

“Ahhh…” Lexi nodded as if it were the simplest thing ever. “I see… so, just focus to my legs and-” She thrusted herself forward and stumbled. “Uh, was it one leg or both? …Kalluto?” The Sheikah was already going down into the garden. “Hey, tell me if I was doing it right!”

Kalluto crossed the garden alertly, ready to strike whatever creature lay in ambush. Both jumped to attention as a cluster of flowers started swaying and rising: they took up the garden hat of a giant, light-red, elderly mole. She spoke with the voice of a grandma. “Oh, my goodness. What are these naughty little pests stepping over my garden?”

“My name is Kalluto.” The boy whipped out his fan. “And I’ve come to-”

“Who are you calling pests, old lady?!” Lexi jumped in front of him.

“What are you doing?”

“Pre-battle banter!”

“Now, now, that’s no way to treat your elders. I’m going to have to call your parents for misbehaving, dearies.”

“This is a joke.” Kalluto sighed.

“The only one you should be calling is a hospital, once we’re done kicking YOUR butt!” Lexi declared.

“Goodness, this vulgar behavior is unhealthy for the flowers. I’m afraid I’ll have to get the pesticide.”

“The only pesticide here is US! …That sounded better in my head.”

“Just fight.” Kal said. (Play “Major Burrows” from Mario Galaxy!)

Boss fight: Granny Mole

The mole burrowed underground, and they could see the flowers swaying along her trail. Kalluto chased those flowers and used his bending to rip the petals away. Granny sensed the flowers wither and sprouted up in a panic. Kalluto spun a twister of petals around the mole and riddled her with cuts. Granny screamed and blew the petals away, using a watering can to restore those flowers. She dug underneath once more and sent earthquakes in their direction. Kalluto jumped the first one, but Lexi was sunk halfway in the ground. Granny Mole dug over to her and grabbed Lexi’s legs. “Whooooaaa!” She was dragged around the soil and forcibly slammed into a boulder before the mole let her go.

“Grrrr! Well, here’s what I think of your flowers!” Lexi began to karate chop and behead the flowers, spinning like a fan to clear a good amount of them. “If I can chop cinderblocks, flowers are nothing!” She ran from the clearing as Granny returned and tried to water the flowers. “Now try some of my lightning!” She channeled lightning onto her fingers and electrocuted the giant mole like a Taser. Her fur rattled for several seconds before a burst of rage knocked Lexi away. Granny watered the flowers and burrowed again. Kalluto had already bent the petals away from other flowers, but his Stamina Meter prevented him from getting too many. When she came to rewater them, the petals didn’t seem to do any damage. The mole furiously smacked him away while he attempted this.

“It seems we can’t reuse the same attacks. Clever game design.”

“Then I guess we HAVE to work together!” Lexi chopped away the flowers and jumped Granny’s earthquake attacks. When Granny rose out, she fired cannonballs of water at either kid. Kalluto used Shaves to dodge his way to the mole, and once at her stomach, he bombarded her with Finger Pistols. She retreated from him before blasting a storm of water balls to the sky. The balls rained as the kids ran in evasion, but they would forcefully bounce once and toward them before exploding. Lexi tried to kick one away and succeeded, so she kicked the next one to Granny and struck her face. She kicked two more before the angry mole ceased the attack.

Granny began to jump and send waves of earth that would push the kids against the edges. Kalluto jumped these waves with single Moon Walks, but Lexi struggled to gain enough height. “Maybe if I…” She tried to focus energy in her leg and thrust herself toward the wave, but stumbled again as the wave pushed her. “Crud! It probably wouldn’t make it, anyway.”

Kalluto reached Granny and struck her with his Japanese fan, imbuing chi to make it sharp enough to cut her. Granny burrowed and would begin popping up in random areas, shooting quick waterballs at them each time. As Kalluto tried to plan his attack, he saw Lexi stumbling. “Is now really the best time to practice that technique?”

“But it looks so easy, I wanna get it right!”

“Rokushiki requires more precise concentration than karate! Whoa!” He jumped when Granny emerged from beneath him and sliced a Tempest Kick, but she burrowed just in time. “But let’s see if my stamina will allow me to do this.”

When Granny emerged the next time, the area mysteriously grew silent. There was an entire circle of Kallutos slowly and menacingly pacing around the garden. He was using the Rhythm Echo technique to mute the sound within the garden. ‘Whoa, is this Shadow Clone Jutsu?’ Lexi mouthed. ‘Wait, I can’t hear myself talk! This guy’s moves are nuts!’ She noticed Granny wasn’t going back underground, looking around confusedly. ‘He’s confusing her. I have to do something.’ Lexi stared at her hands and willed electricity to form. ‘I already shocked her… but maybe I can try a different move!’

She rushed at the mole’s back and started landing lightning-powered chops. The lightning enhanced her speed and allowed her to maneuver around Granny, landing strikes at all angles as the mole seemed to take damage. “Hi, YAH!” She concluded the combo with a kick against the nose, smashing it inward.

“Aaaaaahhh!” Granny Mole spun around in a dizzy fashion, the Rhythm Echo dispelling. “Oh, my nostrils… how am I to smell my pretty flowers now? You’ll regret this day, you brats! May the flowers have revenge on yoooouu…!” Her voice echoed as she derezzed. (End song.)

“Ha ha! Did you see that combo?! Lightningbending plus karate equals awesome!”

“I suppose you gave yourself that bending.”

“Yeah, so? Didn’t you give yourself that plantbending?”

“In real life, I possess paperbending, a rare sub-form of the element. I couldn’t seem to give myself that power in-game, so I chose normal plantbending so I could utilize flower petals in a similar way. But your lightning doesn’t exist in real life, does it?”

“One of the cool features of the game is giving yourself an element.”

“But what’s the point if it doesn’t exist for real? You should use this game to perfect your natural skills. Of course, my idiot brother gave himself lightning, too…”

“Your brother’s here?”

“Forget I said that.”

“Well, even if I can’t have bending in real life, what’s the big deal? People were supposed to have fun with this game, do things they couldn’t do in real life. I kind of thought about joining the KND a few times, but then all these bad things started happening, like the Pirate War and… it sounds like a lot to be responsible for, you know?” She grinned sheepishly.

“Well, I’m in this game to perfect my skills. If you’re not going to take it seriously, then you’re just an escort mission.”

“Wow… that’s surprisingly insulting.”

Kalluto looked to the spot where Granny disappeared. A large golden key with a big “B” in a circle on its head was floating in place, and when he touched it, it shrank to enter his robe pocket. “I guess we collect these from the bosses. Time to pick another floor.” He began to leave the garden.

“You could at least thank me for helping you!”

“I would’ve preferred to work alone. It’s true that we’re sometimes required to use teamwork, but we clearly don’t share the same ideals.”

“Man, you’re stubborn. I feel like hanging around you even more just to teach you about friendship.”

“Will you not?”

“You still gotta help teach me that Shave thing! I proved myself in battle.”

“Very well… if you’re going to be a nuisance, you should at least try to be useful.”

“Blah, blah,” was Lexi’s only response at this point.

Gun Gale H.Q.

The other SA operatives were contacted about the incident and agreed to meet at the central building, which functioned as a mall for clothing, eating, and equipment. The ops were sitting at a table near the clothing store. “Seriously, Nagisa?” Killua asked. “We’ve barely been exploring and you’re already looking at other girls’ butts?”

“I only glanced for a bit and thought I should let her know!”

“We’re just getting sidetracked at this point.” Morgiana sighed. “Why did we have to take her shopping?”

“Because Nagisa is responsible for getting her some better pants now.” Goombella figured. “Even though Fie is taking her.”

“Aaaaaand we’re back!” Fie called as she and Sinon returned, the latter wearing some taller waist armor.

“And according to her, you can’t see it now.” She stated.

“It’s kind of too bad. I was sort of digging it.”

“Of course you were! Look at your shorts! I can see the ridges of your legs!”

Indeed, Fie’s shorts were nearly falling off. “What? It looks cool.”

“Are you happy now?” Morg asked. “We have other people to look for.”

“She did say she would help us.” Nagisa reminded.

Sinon sighed. “Well, we spent so much time on this that it’s almost time for my match.”

“You have a match? With who?”

“Just some opponents. Our teams and enemies are randomly assigned, but I signed up for this time.”

“Wait, it isn’t a gun match, is it? I thought you said they weren’t holding those.”

“They aren’t holding the traditional kind. Some players have resigned to playing the kid-friendly games. It’s better than nothing. Who knows, maybe you’ll find your friends there.”

“Wanna check it out, guys?” Killua asked.

“Yeah, why not?” Nagisa agreed. “We’ll follow you down!”

“Just keep your eyes up.” Sinon glared. Nagisa shirked in shame.

Sinon led them downstairs to a wide, round elevator. An Inkling girl and a Kateenian man were guarding it. “I’ve brought some guests for the audience.” Sinon told them. “Here’s my pass.”

The guards nodded and allowed them onboard. The group patiently rode the lift downward. It let them off in a dark hallway that led to a lobby. It branched two other directions, and there were also some terminals. “The audience stands are that way.” She pointed right. “If you feel like it, you could try to sign up for a later open match with these terminals.”

“We’ll be rooting for you!” Nagisa smiled. “But… are you sure it’s safe?”

“Yeah, but it does sting a little bit. See for yourself.” Sinon aimed her rifle at him. Morg pulled him aside as the gun fired a jet of blue ink.

“Ink?!” Goombella exclaimed. She remembered the Inkling guard outside. “Wait…”

Sinon branched off from them as Sector SA entered the audience stands, trying to blend in with the aliens in attendance. It seemed the matches were between a blue team and pink team. The pink team had “Mine,” a girl with pink pigtails; “Constanyou,” a tall girl in a green military top, shorts, and black boots, with navy-blue hair and mechanical goggles; “Mayyouperish,” wearing a beanie that covered her left eye, a red and white sweater, and dusky-rose hair; and “Sogeman,” a tengu boy wielding a slingshot.

“I knew it! This is a Turf War!” Goombella realized. “The ones the Inklings hold!”

“I guess no one dies in a Turf War.” Nagisa figured. “And these guys couldn’t really be ‘splatted’ either.”

“There’s Sinon’s team!” Fie pointed.

The blue team marched onto their side of the field. Sinon was unmistakable, but there was another light-blue-haired girl, short and kid-sized with the squid bangs of an Inkling. Fie’s eyes narrowed on the ink-haired girl, her vibrant yellow eyes and cheerful smile one she could recognize anywhere. Even her gray-and-black dress and boots were a fitting match. “That’s her! That’s Millium!”

“Huh? Which one?” Nagisa asked.

“That Inkling one!”

“You didn’t tell us she was an Inkling.”

“That’s just her avatar!”

“Three… two… one… SPLAT!” At the sound of the bell, a messy tournament began.

Chapter Text

So far, this is kinda shaping up to be one of the best Newborn stories. I think we’re doing pretty well with the pacing and the divided character arcs, not to mention some pretty obvious foreshadowing here or there.

The Splat Zone resembled a grocery store with about 21 aisles, but the would-be service areas were replaced with pits of water. There were stairs to second-floor walkways, from which they could jump down onto the shelves or cross ceiling light platforms. The contestants started on opposite sides of the field.

“Bubbles, bubbles everywhere!” Millium was excitedly blasting a bazooka of bouncing bubbles, covering the register area with blue ink as the group scattered. Sinon rushed over to the stairs to take position on the walkway. Her rifle could cover the whole field, each shot exploding and drenching the surrounding area on impact. After shooting miscellaneous spots around the field, she tried to aim at Sogeman; none of the shelves had groceries, so she could target people through them. Sogeman stopped to shoot something, so Sinon took the shot and struck him. For taking what the game considered a “fatal shot,” he was teleported back to the start.

“!” Sinon gasped when she saw missiles heading her way, running as they crashed behind her. “Man, I hate missiles!” She recolored the spots that they inked and retained a snipe position. “Whoa!” Another sniper tried to hit her from the opposite walkway: the bullet missed and burst against the wall behind her, drenching Sinon in pink ink. The culprit was Mine, the pink pigtailed girl. Sinon ducked down to wait for the ink to fade and scoot away from that position. Unfortunately, Mine’s weapon had powered up, firing a Hyper Beam directly along Sinon’s walkway, even piercing its barrier. Sinon decided to jump off the walkway and onto the lower ground. Since she had a power-up herself, she fired a small nuke up at Mine’s walkway and managed to “splat” her with the explosion.

“Mayyouperish” was shooting a bazooka at Millium, who swiftly dodged backward in the aisle and bounced bubbles at her foe. Millium was being shot from the left, realizing “Constanyou” was behind the shelves and shooting twin pistols. Paint was being dumped over her from the shelves, for one of the Blue Team’s members, Chadley, was standing atop them. He seemed to be a white-haired boy in geeky attire. Constan retreated and climbed one of the other shelves, getting level to shoot at Chadley. However, she was easily sniped by Sinon.

“So, getting ‘killed’ in the Turf War wouldn’t log you out of the game.” Fie observed. “It just sends you back to your starting point. Honestly, whoever tested that out was pretty gutsy.”

“It still makes me worried.” Morg said.

“Me, too.” Nagisa agreed. “But nothing seems to be wrong so far.”

The other Blue Team member, a rhino Mobian, jumped across the ceiling lights and shot ink down with shoulder cannons. Mine spotted and tried to shoot the rhino, but Millium surfed up to her under a river of ink and jumped out before bombarding Mine with bubbles. Mine retreated, but panicked as Millium encased herself in a glass ball. She climbed a shelf to escape the Ink Ball, so Millium rolled around and left a trail of ink. The ball exploded into a bigger ink mass, but it was then she was splatted by Constan. The latter was using an Inkjet to fly around and shooting strong shots everywhere. Sinon was unable to get a good aim on the fast-moving target, and the sniper ended up splatted by May. Mine shot down the rhino player.

With one minute remaining, Millium was frantically bouncing bubbles everywhere to cover as much ground as possible. Mine aimed her rifle through a shelf and tried to snipe her through them, her teammates rushing to fix Millium’s damage. Sinon ran back to the walkways to cover up any uninked spots. She then jumped across the lights, watching as Chadley confronted Constan and splatted her. May engaged Millium, dodging each other’s ink, while Sogeman got behind Millium and cornered her. She simply dove through the shelves as a squid, then tried bubbling them from behind. Mine was about to land a shot on her, but Sinon sniped the sniper first. Millium then splatted Sogeman.

Sinon smirked and saw Mine respawn at her base. She tried to shoot her as she stepped out, but Mine jumped back in her base, which was protected by a barrier. Chadley came to splash paint around their turf, leaving Sogeman to deal with him while Mine tried to shoot Sinon down. Sinon dropped to the floor in retreat, and the Pink Team desperately tried to recover the floor. Sadly, the timer ran out.

The Blue Team covered 50% of the field, while Pink Team covered 48%. The victors were decided. “Ha ha! That was awesome!” Nagisa cheered.

“Let’s hurry back and meet up with them!” Goombella ushered.

Both teams retired to the prep room. “Phew, that was a good game!” Millium beamed, raising a hand. “Awesome job, enemy team!”

“Oh, boo!” Mine whined, leaving in a huff. “I’ll get you on the next round!”

“We need more training before we attempt the boss.” Constan said. “We can’t afford to hold back.”

“I believe we are making some fruitful progress.” Chadley said, his tone rather matter-of-fact. “You are all very skilled marksmen.”

“By the way… your username is Oz73, isn’t it?” Sinon asked Millium.

“Yeah. So?”

“I think you’re the one who-”

“Millium, is that you?”

They looked as Sector SA walked in. Millium’s face grew brighter at the familiar silver-haired girl. “SLURMYYY!” The Inkling became a squid and sprung to the ceiling, reforming as she sat on Fie’s shoulders. “Fie! I didn’t think you got this game, too!”

“I didn’t think you would make yourself tinier.”

“The tinier, the hotter! Not like you bothered to change your look.”

“I used to be a wolf, but that Infinite guy wiped my avatar. At least you don’t seem down about this situation.”

“Yeah, but it’s not like I’m just having fun.” Millium moped cutely, lightly swaying her feet from her perch. “A bunch of us are practicing to defeat the boss of this level.”

“Might you lot be here to practice as well?” Chadley asked.

“We’re sort of just exploring.” Goombella replied. “But we would be glad to help out! Though marksmanship isn’t really my strong suit.” She felt no need to explain why.

“Perhaps a Head Cannon would best suit you.”

“Head Cannon?”

“It’s specially suited for those who chose the Goomba species. The developers thought of everything, you know!”

“Then, I guess I could give it a try.”

“I’ll sign up, too!” Nagisa cheered. “But, question: can we use our element bending in Turf War?”

“Unfortunately, bending is disabled during Turf War.” Chadley answered. “But it would be beneficial against the boss.”

“Who are you guys, anyway?” Millium asked.

“Sector SA. I’m Nagisa, this is Morgiana, Goombella, and Killua.”

“He’s not part of our sector.” Morg said.

“Yes I am.” Kill smirked.

“So, you’re KND ops, too! Hehe, and you’ll fit into our team with that blue hair of yours!” Millium patted Nagisa’s head.

“I guess I will! But by the way, who is the boss of this floor, anyway?”

“The boss is some sort of horseback-riding Grim Reaper.” Sinon replied. “Supposedly, he lurks in Dead Man Valley out in the desert. But get this…” she began to speak darkly, as if telling a scary story. “Whenever a match in Gun Gale seems to be going too long, with at most four players remaining, the Reaper will appear in the battle area. The players are alerted to his presence by the sound of galloping hooves. He swoops into the field and shoots any player that crosses his vision.”

“But if he does that, doesn’t he make himself vulnerable?” Killua asked.

“Not really. It’s sort of like one of those hidden superbosses: they have high HP and strength, so you’d want to avoid it at all costs. We think the Reaper is more manageable in his actual boss room, but he’s programmed to be stronger while on the field. The story reason is probably because he gains power from all the death that had occurred.”

“But this was when the players weren’t literally dying, right?”

“Yeah. Just when the avatars were derezzed.”

“Fortunately, the Reaper can’t appear in the Turf Wars.” Chadley replied.

“That sounds like our kind of enemy, eh Naggy?”

“It sure does! Let’s sign up!”

“You can take my spot for the next bout.” Chadley said. “I’m eager to see what you can do.”

Constanyou had gone to talk with Mayyouperish. “It looks like Sogeman left.” May said. “If that group is entering, we can have the pink-haired girl fill in.”

“I actually know these people.” Constan said. “They’ll be much more useful than Sogeman.”

“He’s probably only here for fun. I mean, not all of us are brave enough to face the bosses.”

“What choice do we have? We can’t leave if we don’t fight them.”

“I know that, but it’s not like they’re KND operatives like us. They just want to survive.”

“I want to survive, too… but I’m not afraid to fight.” Constan raised her guns proudly. “I will make it back to my friends!”

Elevator Tower

“Like, the dude wasn’t invested in the story at all!” Kazma ranted to Eddy as they entered the tower. “He just kept babbling about unrelated bullshit and otherwise only cared about over-leveling himself and being flawless at the game. He even fucking spoiled the final boss for himself just so he could make a strategy! I liked him when he was strict about no spoilers, so what the hell happened?!”

“I mean, he was obviously confused by the story because he didn’t play the previous entries.” Eddy shrugged. “That’s the problem when you only go for the newest games. Ugh, and when he got to the dramatic, emotional ending, he started clipping memes into the video!”

“God, that totally ruined the experience!”

“Are you two just going to rant about random Let’s Players this whole journey?” Quill asked. “Because it’s already annoying.”

“Well, maybe you’ll like this one.” Eddy began. “Say you’re playing a game with cute, likeable characters. You start to get attached to a particular one. But suddenly, that character sacrifices himself for another and loses his life in a sad, heart-wrenching twist. How would you react to that?”

“I mean… that would be pretty sad.”

“Yeah, well a popular gamer says, ‘Hahahahahahaha! He looked funny! Hahahahahahaha!’” Eddy stretched his mouth in a mocking annoying fashion.

“Dude, I know who that is!” Kazma exclaimed. “Yeah, screw that guy!”

“Eh…you made your point.” Quill admitted. “But just stay focused.”

The group picked an elevator with no one else inside and boarded it. As they rose to Floor 51, Quill received a call from Raleigh via the Friend Code. He clicked his screen as Raleigh’s image appeared. “Hey, Quill! Are you guys still in the Dragon Towers?”

“We’re in the elevator. We’re heading to the kart-racing level on Floor 51.”

“That’s perfect! Carol was able to upload a certain somebody into the game, and she’ll love the racing floor! I’ll send her up right now.”

“I’m pretty hyped for it myself.” Quill cracked a smile.

“Speaking of Carol,” Eddy began, “we and other computer users have been keeping in contact through texts. According to them, one of Sector AC’s operatives was trapped in the game, but Uiharu sent an A.I. in to protect them, too. Hibiki from Sector KB sent an A.I. in. He’s trying to find the place where all the comatose people are supposed to load. Index from Sector SA says that her team is also in here somewhere. Speaking of which, she and Carol remember Infinite from Azoth Kingdom.”

“Yeah! I didn’t have a chance to mention it, but he works for Dr. Eggman.”

“Exactly. Once we get this info to GKND, they’ll hopefully work out a plan to locate Eggman and stop Infinite from outside.”

“Infinite’s destruction would be highly welcome.” Boly replied. “However, the collection of the Pure Hearts must still be priority.”

“‘Highly welcome’?” Carmine asked. “Hehe, I didn’t think you were so spiteful!”

“Infinite has destroyed my programming and ruined my game. I believe users would feel such an emotion in a similar situation.”

“Hey, I’m as spiteful as they come!” Miko agreed with a scowl. “Screw Infinite! I’mma pound him into the pixels!”

“Damn right!” Jenny smirked. “Any other operatives stuck in here?”

“A few of them.” Eddy answered. “Though actually…eh, I guess that’s not important.”

“What’s not important?” asked Quill.

“It’s just that a few other sectors happen to be on missions of their own.”

“What could be more important than this?”

“That’s why I said it’s not important! Sectors MG and IC are supposedly on ‘quests’ of their own, that’s all I know. I guess that means they won’t be able to help.”

“We can worry about ourselves.” Jenny said. “Though… hey, Kazma. Where are you logged in, anyway?”

“Just in my room, at my house. My folks haven’t seemed to take my helmet off, yet, so… I assume they got the message.”

“Maybe I could fly to your house to check on you.” Eddy suggested. “Where do you live?”

“Whoa, I’m not giving you guys my address! I like you guys so far, but not enough for that.”

“Yeah, that’s true…”

“I guess I’ll keep searching on my own.” Raleigh said. “Let me know how it goes!” He hung up.

Miko released a sigh and returned to the window displaying the passing levels. “Man, that distracted me from all the cool scenery.” She admired the sights of Floria, though hadn’t noticed Lexi and Kalluto walking across the central garden. They flew by Myujen on Floor 49, a Christmas-themed town with bright trees and flying sleighs. Floor 50, Algade, appeared to be a jovial town of pirates and sea shanty music, the buildings made of wrecked ships and an ocean surrounding the town. But the elevator slowed to a halt once they were at Level 51.

They walked out into a vast parking lot packed with racecars, hearing engines roaring in the distance as players were either driving in or driving off. Roads wrapped around the valley like ribbons, leading to various stadiums or environments. “Sniiiiiiiiff…” Quill inhaled a long breath. “Smells like rubber…”

“You’re weird.” Kazma snickered.

“Shut up. So, can we just take any car we want?”

“It costs 200 Cor to rent a standard vehicle.” Boly answered. “More improved models will cost extra. However, there is also a workshop in which players can construct their own vehicles, but individual parts will cost Cor.”

“What’s Cor?”

“Cor is the currency of Aincrad. You have been collecting Cor with each enemy successfully defeated.”

“Oh, yeah.” Miko checked her inventory. “We do have Cor! About 5,000!”

“And I’ve got about 10,000 on me.” Kazma mentioned.

“Dang, we’re rich!” Jenny perked up.

“In that case, I’m off to construct a car of my own!” Quill fist-pumped. “Why don’t you guys look around for any operatives?”

“Boly, which way is the Pure Heart in?” Miko asked.

“It is approximately to the southwest.”

“I’ll bet finding it will entail some sort of race. Better make sure I craft the best darn thing I can!”

While Eddy accompanied Quill to the workshop, the team split up to explore the parking lot, with Carmine joining Miko. The bomber was happily skipping along the roofs of the cars. The sky was far brighter than it was on Dragon Towers, the sun beating down and reflecting off the polished cars. The kids had to squint their eyes with sun bouncing in every direction, though it didn’t impede Carmine’s carefree jumping. “You’re really enjoying it here, huh, Carmine?”

“Haha, yeah. It just feels so nice to have skin again! The sun feels so nice, the air is so clean, and even when the ground feels rough, it feels so nice to walk on!”

“Aincrad is designed to feel comfortable and adaptable for any and all players.” Boly replied. “It is satisfying to know you are pleased by the product.”

“As pleased as we can get.” Miko figured.

“Haha.” Carmine sat and rested on a car. “I know we’re on an important mission, but… after we get Aincrad fixed, I feel like I’ll wanna spend more time here. Like, maybe when we go to sleep, I can just log in and spend the whole night like this!” She stretched all four of her limbs with a lively expression.

“You are quite interesting, Carmine.” Boly said. “Unlike me, you are a mortal, and yet you possess high appreciation for common mortal attributes. I can conjecture based on your initial appearance that you possess a disability that weakens your usage of such attributes.”

“That’s basically it. It’s not that I’m ashamed of how I look, but it’s like you said… I love being able to feel things again.”

“It really is an amazing game.” Miko smiled as she stared at her reflection in the car window. “If it wasn’t for Infinite, I would probably get lost in this game for years. This would’ve been my dream back in the day.”

“Me_K.O., I am curious as to why you did not log in upon the game’s release. According to President Kayaba’s data, you are a very devout gamer who has topped numerous scores.”

“Well… it’s because I wasn’t sure whether to trust this game. Hinobi’s glitches hurt my new friends, and they were sort of mad at me because of it. Playing their games just didn’t feel the same, anymore.”

“Your ‘new friends’ have negatively influenced your perspective on Hinobi’s creations?”

“Er, they…” Miko went silent, realizing that Boly was technically such a creation.

Carmine frowned, sensing that the Program’s feelings were hurt. “Boly, a lot of Hinobi’s Programs malfunction and try to hurt people. They were glitches just like Infinite’s robots. But you’re not a glitch. You’re a nice Program and we’re glad you’re helping us.”

“You are correct.” Boly’s eyes saddened. “Hinobi’s creations are imperfect. I am also imperfect. President Kayaba believed this game would be the true key to perfection, and I was to ensure this. But due to Infinite’s interference, I have failed.”

“Boly, people aren’t supposed to be perfect.” Miko said comfortingly. “And the same goes for Programs. But when we have each other, we can make each other better!”

“That is also correct.” The eyes lit up. “Now that you are here, Me_K.O., we can attain perfection.”

Miko giggled at what she perceived as a compliment. “Friendship is power! But you don’t have to keep calling me by my username, just call me Miko.”

“Acknowledged… User Miko.”

Jenny and Kazma talked to miscellaneous players, but none of them confirmed to be operatives. Kazma kind of had to keep up the pace as Jenny was rolling along. He was curious as to why most of these cars had antennas attached to the back of them, pulling one and releasing it to watch it vibrate out of boredom. “…?” But through the vibrating antenna, he spotted three familiar faces: Arnold, Rez, and Francis, each checking out some cars.

“What’s wrong, Kaz?” Jenny backed up to him.

“Uh, nothing. Just thinking.”

Jenny glanced to the trio in question. “Let’s ask those boys!” She rolled over.

“Uh, actually…” he tried to stop her, but she was too quick.

“Hey, boys!” The three turned to the roller-blader. “You wouldn’t happen to be KND, would you?”

“Pfft, do we look like KND?” Rez chortled. “…” He frowned as he looked up a bit and noticed, “Is that Kazma?”

“Kazma? Are you friends of his?”

“Barely.” Arnold sneered.

Seeing he was already noticed, Kazma manned up and marched over to them. “So, how’s beating the bosses going? You make any progress?”

“What’s it to you?” Francis asked.

“Heh. Check THIS out.” Kazma opened his inventory and extracted a large, golden “B” key.

“Whoa! Where’d you get that?!” Jenny exclaimed.

“It appeared after I touched that Pure Heart. But you were too distracted to see it appear. I’m thinking these are what the bosses are supposed to drop.”

“So, you defeated a boss, good for you.” Arnold said. “But we got this floor covered, so go find another one.”

“Geez, what’s your problem?” Jenny asked.

“He likes to talk smack about our friend.” Rez answered. “I’m sure you’ve heard of The Guy.”

“What guy?”

“THE Guy.” Arnold clarified.

The boys proceeded to explain what happened to The Guy upon Infinite’s takeover. “I tried to pay my respects.” Kazma reminded. “I may not’ve liked his guts, but I’m not heartless.”

“Whatever. Anyway, just leave us alone.”

“Hey, cut the guy a break.” Jenny said, folding her arms. “When we’re in this situation, we shouldn’t be fighting each other.”

“That’s why we’re telling you to leave us alone. Go find another boss to beat.”

“No, we got business on this floor. A friend of ours is really excited to race on this floor, so we’re gonna. And we wanna find the boss while we’re at it.”

“Well, we called dibs on it. Besides, you don’t even know where to look.”

“I-…” Jenny stopped herself. Actually, she deduced the boss was guarding the Pure Heart, which means it was to the southwest… however, she couldn’t just say that. “Wait, do YOU even know where to look?” She cocked a brow.

“Not exactly.” Rez shrugged. “But we picked up a tip on how to find-”

“Shut it!” Arnold smacked his stomach.

“Oh, I see.” Jenny smirked. “You know the trick to finding it, and I know where the boss is?”

“Pfft, no you don’t!” Francis chortled.

“Then let’s make a little bet. Or rather… let’s have a race. If I win, you give me your info, but if you win, I’ll give you mine. Otherwise, if we don’t know the other’s info, we won’t be able to search for the boss.”

“Hmm…I see where you’re getting at. But what if you’re lying?”

“Then Kazma and I will polish your vehicles if we are.”

“Uh, the hell I am!”

“Well, it’s not like I’m lying, anyway.”

“Y’know, why not?” Rez replied. “We’ll take you on. Is it just you or are you bringing a buddy?”

“What, can we bring ‘buddies’?”

“Each kart is allowed to carry two people in a race.” Francis replied. “They ride in a buddy seat and they can carry an additional item.”

“Alright, then I’ll carry one of my teammates.”

“Fine then.” Arnold complied. “I think they’re holding a race over there, so let’s join in. If you can beat the three of us, we’ll share what we know. But if just one of us beats you, then you lose.”

“Perfect. Let me just go consult with my mechanic.”

Inside the workshop, Quill studied all the available parts as he formulated a vehicle in his mind. “So, it looks like I can only make karts fit for two people… which means I’d have to make three karts. Unless we all squeeze onto the seats. You might have to shrink your avatar’s dimensions, Eddy.”

“Nah, I’ll just take my own car.” Eddy said as he used a ladder to climb the wall of kart parts. “Unfortunately, I won’t be able to hack this system like we did against Gaz.” He curiously noticed a tire with a green “?” trophy. He collected said trophy. “Should’ve known Riddler would be in this game.”

“Hacking or no hacking, I can handle any jerky racer.”

“Yo, Quill!” Jenny rolled into the workshop. “I think I got a lead on the Pure Heart!”

“A lead? But we already know it’s southwest.”

“I know, but that doesn’t mean we’ll know how to find it. I ran into these three guys who have a clue on how to find the boss; and I’m guessing the boss would have the Pure Heart.”

“Couldn’t Boly just tell us how to find the boss?” Eddy asked.

“Depends if its memory works well. Either way, I’m up for a good race, anyway. So, I’m gonna need a good vehicle.”

“Do you want a Safety on it?” Kazma asked as he walked in.

“A Safety?”

“I just asked those three what those antennas were on the karts. Those are Safety Antennas. They keep players from going off-road or crashing. They also make sure the vehicles land upright whenever you perform tricks.”

“Oh…” Jenny frowned. “So… I guess if we crashed, we’d… lose a ton of HP, huh?”

“Ugh…Safety.” Eddy scoffed. “That’s why modern games suck, always a Safety Mode. But I’m guessing everyone has to use it if they wanna race without dying.”

“Then I’d better put them on our karts.” Quill said. “So, what kind of vehicle you want, Jenny?”

Airplane Valley Course

The race course was an actual airport with planes either stationed on the ground, suspended in the air, or at least flying in set paths. Francis was driving an orange motorcycle with a single, large wheel at the front. Arnold drove a car that looked like a large preying mantis. Rez drove a yellow jetcar. As for Jenny… well… the racers and audience members couldn’t hold in their confusion or laughter.

Jenny was driving a pair of oversized skate shoes. In fact, there wasn’t even a steering wheel: Jenny was standing on a pair of motion-sensor platforms attached to the shoes. Those platforms were also attached to a buddy seat for Miko to ride. “Pfft! You plan to race with THAT?” Francis laughed.

“What? The tagline in the store said, ‘Any car we can imagine, so long as wheels touch the road.’”

“Darn right!” Miko smirked. “Heck, if this game gets updates, they’ll let us drive trains!”

“Actually, there are trains.” Boly replied. Indeed, one of the racers, a tall lean man with a Vulcan avatar, was grinning giddily while waiting in his miniature train kart. His username was “Sheldor.”

“Even so, this kind of craft looks gyroscopically unstable.” Carmine said. “Videogame physics are pretty convenient.”

“But in that kind of position, you’ll have to keep your body more active.” Arnold said. “While we have the comfort of using wheels and gas pedals. Even with that Safety on, you’ll be toast.”

“Who says I don’t have gas pedals?” Jenny asked, tapping her toes to the boost buttons in her shoes.

“Hah, good luck working with that~”

The other racers included a purple- and black-clothed helmeted person on a blue and yellow uni-motorcycle, a guy that looked like Speed Racer, and a bat Faunus driving a Batmobile. A Lakitu hovered over the Starting Line and held the stoplights. “One… two… three… GO!” (Play “Mario Kart Stadium” from MK8!)

Stage 3: H-Zero

Mission: Defeat the Guy Trio in the race!

Act 1: Airplane Valley

Jenny pressed the gas buttons in her shoes and sped forth, kicking her rollers along the road to add speed. There was plenty of open space around the airport, but Jenny screamed as an airplane zoomed toward them. The Safety steered them out of the way, watching as the plane took off. “Kinda thought they would just stay stationary!” The racers had to drift rightward to go around a wall of luggage, then make another drift left. Jenny tried to lift the right shoe into rolling along the wall, but the Safety simply kept her away from the wall. The racers hit their first line of ?-Blocks, in which Jenny earned three Red Shells, designed to home on other racers. “Perfect! Miko, you do the aiming!”

As the turn ended, they went up some surfboard ramps, the racers doing flips to gain brief speed boosts, though Miko noticed the unicycle racer land on a treadmill along the right to go faster. Regardless, Miko shot a Red Shell at Arnold and stunned him, allowing them to pass. She shot another at Francis, but he used a Green Shell to shield himself, so the third Red Shell was used to knock him back. The racers had to go up a ramp that rose from the port: their gliders would automatically activate as they took flight to the sky. “Whooooaaaa!” As they flew directly toward a plane, they all curved upside-down and drove along the underside. “Heeeey! Why did the world flip?!”

“Gravity Zones!” Quill observed. “They pulled out all the stops with these courses!”

Disoriented for a bit, Jenny seized another ?-Block, earning a Green Shell, though not a handy item to have in 3rd place. As they crossed the plane, they had to veer off onto the left side in order to line up with the underside of another, vertical plane. “Jenny! Shortcut!” Miko alerted, seeing a series of far-apart small planes leading to a control tower. Jenny twisted her boots to make the jump to this route-

“WHAT?!” The Safety immediately stopped her. As she tried to readjust herself, the other racers zoomed right past. “You mean the Safety won’t let us take shortcuts?!” She scrambled to catch up to the pack, Miko deciding to ditch the shell. They landed on another plane and had to steer to its roof, from which they could enter the hull of an airship. Jenny performed drifts to go up the winding stairs of the ship, ramming the Batkid as he was stopped by a banana peel. They grabbed another item as they exited the ship, having to bounce some planes downward toward the control tower. The tower had a Grav Path leading down it, in which Jenny seized a ?-Block. She earned a Super Star, designed to grant them invincibility and speed them up.

She immediately activated it as they zoomed toward a vent in the building’s roof: the players were forcibly shrunken to enter the vent, later to drive on a conveyor belt inside. The tiny racers dodged around gigantic luggage, Jenny striking Sheldor, and she saw a shortcut to the left where they could jump the top of floor-level luggage. Sadly, the Safety forced her to stay on track, with Sheldor passing her. Jenny growled and tried to catch up as her Star wore off. They drifted left onto another belt, then would have to curve right to get off it as they returned to normal size. They crossed the Starting Line as Lap 2 began.

“You know what, screw the Safety! Miko, tear it off!”

“You sure?”

“Absolutely! I survived worse races than this!”

Miko nodded and tore the antenna off. Jenny saw an item block toward the left and turned to grab it whilst dodging a rolling plane. She earned the Blue Shell and decided to let it loose, the spiked shell making a siren sound as it sought the lead racer. It ploughed past Sheldor as Jenny passed him. She got another item before reaching the surfboard ramps, leaning rightward in order to land on the treadmill shortcut, which had Dash Panels to speed her up. She was able to pass the Speed Racer wannabe and get 5th place before making the flight to the airplanes. Her current item was a Place Swap, but she waited to fire it. She was intending to take the shortcut across the mini planes and reach the control tower faster… until Speed Racer used a Blooper item to ink the other racers’ vision. “AAH! I can’t see!”

“Jenny, just stay on the track!” Miko yelled, only one eye covered. “Keep going straight—now lean right, lean right—okay, go straight again!”

They got into the airship as the ink ran out, Jenny performing drifts to get up the stairs, but she was able to pass Francis. They saw Rez in the process of jumping planes toward the tower, so Jenny fired the Place Swap and struck him. Rez was taken off-guard as he warped backwards, accidentally falling off a plane. Luckily, his Safety triggered a balloon to carry him back to the airship. Jenny was in 3rd by the time she reached the tower, earning another Red Shell Trio. They shrank to enter the vent, followed by the luggage conveyor as Miko judged the best time to shoot at Arnold. She first wanted to take the shortcut to the left, but Rez suddenly caught up and blasted fireballs, destroying Jenny’s shells and stunning her in place. Rez laughed and passed her, and Jenny growled as she was forced to stay on the main track again.

As she drifted onto the second conveyor, Jenny noticed a hidden path on the left that sloped down under the belt and would give her a ?-Block. She earned a Triple Mushroom, using the first one to speed up as they entered Lap 3. Crossing the port, Miko spotted a route to the right, but since it was covered in mud, it would slow players down. Their mushrooms could grant the boost they needed to cross the mud, going up a Flight Ramp that would glide them over the luggage drift zone. They passed Rez, seized another ?-Block, and leapt up onto the treadmill to boost them further. Sadly, the item block only gave them Triple Bananas. The 2nd place Arnold appeared to have a Bob-omb, dropping it on the Flight Ramp in attempt to hurt them, but Jenny expertly dodged and launched off the ramp. With a nicely aimed shot, Miko launched a banana at Arnold midflight, causing him to plummet.

His balloon would return him to safety, but Jenny bypassed him. Though the unicycle racer was still ahead, it was enough to be ahead of the boys. Still, it seemed that said racer was taking the shortcut across the small planes, so Jenny braved the odds and followed their example. She bravely leapt the planes and reached the tower whilst skipping the airship zone. They seized an additional item block, and Miko dropped another banana outside the vent. Once they entered the luggage zone—“WHOA!!” They were struck by a Blue Shell as it zoomed through. They regained their selves in time and acquired enough speed to jump the large luggage. They watched as the Blue Shell struck the lead racer, so Jenny was able to pass her upon crossing the shortcut. Said racer tossed a banana directly ahead of them, but Jenny dodged and hit the Finish Line. (End song.)

“Ha HAAAA! Holy frick, we came in First!”

“Way to go, girl!” Miko cheered, double-fiving her friend.

“YAHOOOO!” Carmine screamed, being the first to run up and congratulate them. “I was afraid you weren’t gonna make it!”

“Dang, that was incredible!” Quill exclaimed.

The unicycle rider came in second. Francis used a Bullet Bill to bypass his friends and hit 3rd, and Speed Racer passed them with a Star to hit 4th. Arnold got 5th and Rez 6th. “Alright, a deal’s a deal.” Jenny stated. “You have to tell me what you know.”

“Come on, that wasn’t fair!” Francis argued. “You took the Safety off!”

“Since when was that a rule?” Kazma asked. “If anything, you cheated by having it on! So, tell us how to find the boss!”

The boys shared a look with one-another. “Fine.” Rez decided. “All we know is that you have to hit some switches on one of the tracks. We’re trying to figure out which track it is.”

“It isn’t just one track.” A girl’s voice spoke.

They turned to the helmeted unicycle racer. They pulled off their helmet, revealing to be a preteen girl with brown hair. “There’s a switch on four separate tracks.”

“And who’re you supposed to be?” Francis asked.

“I’m Demetra. I’ve been exploring the tracks myself, and I found this.” She displayed a holographic map, depicting four tracks with numbers beside each, and they were within crystal shapes. “It’s a map I found inside the Mall Course. I recognize the four tracks on it. I wasn’t sure what the crystals meant at first, but taking your switch clue into consideration, that must be it.”

“So, we need to play those tracks and find the switches!” Quill deduced.

“Actually, I tried to explore the tracks myself, but I couldn’t find them. But I only played them individually. So, my theory is the switches will only appear if we play all four.”

“Oh, I get it!” Francis beamed.

“Get what?” Eddy asked. “I’m not sure I follow.”

“Instead of doing multiple 3-lap races,” Demetra explained, “players are allowed to compete in one, long race across four tracks. When this happens, different routes can appear on the tracks. That’s probably what we’ll need to do.”

“Then we’d better hurry and reserve those tracks.” Arnold suggested.

“Ah-ah.” Demetra stopped him. “These guys beat you, so they get to go sign up first. I’m sure they’ll be available though~” She passed a wink to Miko.

“Uh…okay? We’d better go then.”

Miko rode on Jenny’s buddy seat, Kazma rode on Quill’s kart, and Carmine on Eddy’s. Demetra was following them on their way back to the workshop. Demetra showed them the sign-up terminals and pointed out the tracks in question. “Ah! There’re plenty of spots open.” Quill said. “Then we just need to click these four… select ‘Combined Track’… and sign our names. Perfect!”

“But how will we know where the switches appear?” Carmine asked.

“We’ll have to stay behind one-another to have more chances of getting them. If the first racer misses, the second can get it. Though I guess these guys can help us, too.”

“Still got room on those sheets?” Arnold asked as his group walked in. “If we get the Boss Door opened, we’re going in first.”

“I guess it technically doesn’t matter who fights the boss-” Miko said.

“No, it has to be us.” Kazma stated. “We’re the ones who’re gonna fix this game.”

“Hah, you?” Rez retorted.

“Yeah, us. So, sit back and enjoy your Safety Mode.”

“Hey, what’s goin’ on over here?!” a cheery, but nasally voice called.

“Alert! Unregistered glitch detected!” Boly shouted.

The group looked over at a very short racer wearing a white sweater with cyan edges and matching helmet, standing beside a candy kart. “Vanellope?!” Quill recognized.

The candy girl tapped her helmet and dematerialized it, revealing her smirk and big narrowed eyes. “I hope I’m not la—te to the party!” She stalled and flashed for a second.

“No, you’re just in time!” Eddy said. “I should’ve figured Raleigh was sending you!”

“Raleigh? …I mean, yeah! Who else did you expect?” Vanel played along.

“Dangerous glitch detected!” Boly yelled. “Terminate immediately!”

“Boly, she isn’t dangerous! She’s another friend of ours!” Miko said.

“Not… dangerous?”

“Let’s get you signed up, too, Vanel!”

“Yeah?” Vanellope approached, her body glitching as her pupils briefly flashed eye symbols. “What’re we signing up for?”

“We’ll tell you on the way there.”

Eddy knelt down and whispered to her, “Don’t tell those other guys, but we sort of know a way to fix the game.”

“Wow, really?”

Somewhere else

“They have a way to fix the game, they say?” XANA asked himself. “How concerning… perhaps this has to do with the strange heart Love Machine mentioned. Lucky for me, these kids seem to be acquaintances of hers. Let’s hope Wanellabee can keep this act up long enough.”

Gun Gale

Goombella bit onto a wire attached to her Head Cannon, shooting a jut of pink ink. “I think I’m used to it! Let’s test it out on the field!”

“All right.” Morgiana said, wearing ringlet cannons on her legs. Thrusting a leg forward, she fired some pink ink. “Let’s head to our starting areas.”

The two of them were paired with Constanyou and Mayyouperish while Nagisa’s team had Sinon, Killua, and Millium. “My school played paintball once.” Nagisa said, tossing his twin pistols around. “I was pretty good at it, so I think I’ll do fine here!”

“I’m not really into paintball.” Sinon said.

“Well, you seem to be into Splatoon.”

“Because I don’t really have a choice at the moment. All I’m saying is, between paintballs or ink… they’re not the same.”

“When did you get so sour?” Killua asked.

“So, you like more mature games with ‘real’ guns.” Nagisa figured. “I mean, that’s fine and all, but that doesn’t stop these kinds of games from being fun.”

“It’s not about ‘liking’ them…” Sinon mumbled.

“Huh?”

“Forget it.”

As both teams stepped onto the field, Fie, Chadley, and some others watched from the audience. The world seemed to glitch. “Hm? That’s strange.”

“You felt that, too?” Fie asked.

“Yes… and it appears the timer has been extended.” He indicated the Turf War’s timer, now reading 15 minutes.

“Yikes… that feels kinda long for one match. Maybe I’ll just take a nap.” Fie lied down on her seat and relaxed.

The players remained relatively unaware of the extended timer, as nothing else seemed wrong. But they remained more unaware of the grim-looking figure that briefly glitched into being outside the field.

This story is also sort of like an extension of the Free Kingdom Arc. That arc was all about minigames, and had the same games this story has, except this story is longer and more focused. XD By the way, if anyone wants to swing by deviantART, Sarstar98 and I wrote a long collab one-shot starring Dimentia, Marine, and some of her characters, involving a certain side-plot set up in Spiritverse! The one-shot is called “Toxic Encounter.”

Chapter Text

Boy, this chapter has a lot! Seriously, I can’t believe I finished it in one day!

Sector Q explained the situation to Vanellope as they drove to their destination, followed by Demetra and Guy’s trio. The four racetracks they would have to cross would be the Water Park, Western Valley, Ice Cream Shop, and then the Prehistoric Caverns.

“So, how come we aren’t letting those other guys know about the hearts?” Vanellope asked. “Are they enemies?”

“Nah, Kazma’s just not cool with them.” Jenny replied passively. “I mean, they are kinda grudgey…”

“So, Vanellope, is Carol monitoring you from a computer?” Eddy asked. “I’m actually controlling an A.I. from mine.”

“So, you’re not actually in the game?”

“No. It’s the best way to watch over my friends while still being with them.”

“Ah, okay…” Vanel narrowed her eyes with a nod, though they briefly sparked the eye symbol. “But yeah, she’s watching over me. Unlike you, I have my own free will~ I’m too cool to be controlled.”

…

“Yeah, that’s the snappy remark she would make.” XANA sneered. “But they’re sure to be onto me before long. Good thing Sark is already on the way.”

The kids all lined up at the Water Park’s starting line. Quill’s kart matched his clothes, white with black streaks, three engines on the top back, and ‘Q’ shapes inside the tires. Kazma rode in his bunny seat, having assumed his rabbit form for this contest. Jenny reused her Mega Rollers, with Miko in the buddy seat, and Eddy drove a kart that resembled a big pair of glasses, carrying Carmine on his seat.

“Just so you know, we’re still playing to win.” Demetra said. “We’re gonna be fighting each other for the boss.”

“Yeah, well we’re a team.” Quill stated. “And Vanel and I are the best racers there are.”

“How did you change back into your avatar anyway, Kazma?” Arnold asked.

“None of your business!”

“Me_K.O., I have a query.” Boly said. “Our strategy may be more effective with you piloting a kart. Do you not possess expertise in racing games?”

“Yeah, but I don’t mind being a passenger. These guys are awesome!”

“You bet we are!” Jenny expressed confidently. “Get ready!”

The stoplight Lakitu hovered over the Start. “One… two… three… GO!” (Play “Maka Wuhu” from Mario Kart!)

Act 2: Dino Cup Race

Eddy and Jenny sped off with the other racers while Quill and Vanellope started a little later. “Man, I can’t believe WE have to be the tail end.” Vanel complained. “I race to win, dang it!”

“I feel the same, but this is a different kind of winning!” Quill reminded. “Just keep in touch with the others.”

The karts would speed over some shallow water, and could drive through Rain Rings that would erupt gushes of water to give them a small boost. Arnold knocked Jenny away to stop her from going through one, and he landed on a mushroom platform that had a Flight Ramp. Quill saw this and decided to follow Arnold, the flight leading them to the deck of a small pirate ship. There was a Riddler Trophy set on the keel, so they took it as they pursued Arnold. They grabbed some ?-Blocks, with Arnold earning three bananas and Quill triple Red Shells. The ship deck ended at a boost ramp that landed them on a narrow route atop some mushroom platforms. The other racers would have to drift between and around these mushrooms as they poured waterfall barriers. Arnold dropped the bananas along the upper route, but Quill destroyed them with the shells.

“Aha!” Quill could already see it: a Crystal Switch on a further mushroom, in which they would have to jump other mushrooms over a chasm of water. Arnold was about to attempt this—his Safety Antenna held him back and dropped him back on the main road. Quill and Kazma laughed as they made the jumps, ramming the crystal as it lit up.

“Sweet! We’ve already got the first one!” Vanel exclaimed.

The other racers would hit a spring that would bounce them to the top of a water slide. They would be miniaturized as they drove down the slide, grabbing another line of item blocks. The flowing water helped speed them along, though it was hard to keep traction. In 5th place, Eddy got Triple Mushrooms, but when he made the boost, “WHOOOAA!” he ended up going up the side of the slide, flying off it, and landing on a further part. Carmine clasped onto her seat during this leap, her body flailing behind her, and was quite dizzied by the landing. “Phew…”

“Eddy, behind you!”

“Huh?!” With a gasp, he dodged an incoming Blue Shell. “Thanks, Carmine! But who’s in the… Quill!”

Carmine quickly called Quill with the Friend Code, “Quill, there’s a Blue Shell coming!”

The water slide would launch the tiny racers into a large swimming pool, where they would have to speed over giant inner-tubes while giant A.I. kids would blast water from foam noodles. Quill’s shortcut already brought him on this course, and luckily, an item box gave him a Super Horn. When the Blue Shell caught up to him, he used the horn to blast it away. “Thanks! I think I’ll wait for you guys to go ahead. Listen, I see a shortcut!”

The others received his message by the time they began driving the swimming pool. Miko looked back and asked, “Hey, who’s that?”

A racer in grayish armor and bright red stripes was pursuing them on a motorcycle of similar colors. “Looks like he wanted to join the fun!” Vanellope smirked. “The more, the merrier!”

“Alert! Unregistered glitch detected!”

“A glitch?” Miko asked. “You mean…”

The new racer glitched and acquired a Boomerang item, tossing it at the operatives. Jenny dodged, and since they had acquired a Star, Miko switched it on for invincibility. “Hey, guys, there’s another racer on the tracks! I think it’s an evil glitch!”

“What are the odds they’re another operative?” Carmine asked.

“No time to ask!” Eddy yelled. “Quick, the shortcut!”

The shortcut in question would be to jump off an inner-tube and onto a foam noodle leaning away from them. They zoomed up the noodle and into its water cannon, launching them out of the pool. Normally, the track would guide them back to the start, but they were now racing underneath the pool’s barred borders. They would return to size and drive into a Western town, starting the 2nd lap. Doors and windows would burst open as cowboys quickly fired guns. Rez’s vehicle was shot and stunned, and Demetra bumped Francis into a cactus.

Miko spotted an alternate route through an alley, Jenny twisting left to enter it as they cut through a small canyon. They would get a ?-Block and hit a Glide Ramp and launch off over a chasm, flying to a mountainous area with a train. If they followed the main road, it would cross a long path over the chasm before snaking around to the train. “…?!” Miko panicked as the red racer was gliding after them. He had Triple Red Shells, but all they had was a single Green. The Green protected them from the first Red, but the second Red would send them falling before they could make it!

Fortunately, Quill was already gliding after them, having gained a Boo. The Boo stole the racer’s other two shells as he fired one at the cycle driver. Jenny and Miko landed epically against the side of the train, the gravity shifting in their favor. The red racer crashed against the train as well, Quill parking to confront him. “Are you an enemy?!”

The racer’s visor faded, exposing his droll gray face. “I am Commander Sark. On my master’s command, you operatives are scheduled for deresolution!”

“Yeah, make me!” Quill tried to ram the commander, but he dodged. Quill kept driving as Sark remounted his cycle.

The other racers would catch up and begin driving on the side of the train. They were about to hit a wall, and the roof of the train was unavailable, too, so they had to steer right and drive on the underside of the tracks. Jenny glanced left and saw the Crystal Switch partway off the track and over the chasm. “There’s the switch! But how do we hit it?!”

“Maybe if we had a Boomerang like that guy was using!” Miko suggested.

The duo hit another item block, hoping it would land on a Boomerang… but they got a Mushroom. “Crud! Miko, call the others!”

By the time Eddy spotted the switch in question, he only acquired a Blue Shell. He huffed and decided to drive backwards for another chance at the blocks, letting the shell fly as well. Naturally, the Lakitu would hover over him, wagging his finger in a ‘No’ fashion as he signaled Eddy to U-turn. Naturally, Eddy ignored and kept retrying the blocks until he got a Boomerang. Carmine tossed it at the Crystal Switch. “Finally! We got the 2nd switch!”

“Off to the third lap!” Quill said, continuing to outrun Sark. There would eventually be a hole in the tracks for the upside-down racers to fall down onto the ceiling of the train. “Dang, this is such a cool track! Like, can all of the later levels just be racetracks?”

Arnold tailed behind Sark and got a Bob-omb, deciding to drop it within the narrow train to blow up the racers behind him. Rez had a Bullet Bill and used it to plow through the train, taking down Arnold and Sark, but Quill managed to outrun the bullet before it wore off. Afterwards, Quill got a Triple Green Shell, leaving Kazma to shoot it backwards at the foes. Quill was in 3rd, Jenny in 2nd, and Demetra in first. The racers would exit the train and onto a path carved from the canyon, going vertically down and twisting as it would curve up into a Flight Ramp.

Normally, the ramp would send them across the chasm and onto a path that returned to the Western town. But instead, it was flying them to a large, frosty fortress with giant ice cream on top. The racers landed in a sort of garage for ice cream trucks, beginning the third lap.

…

Eddy’s eyes were fixed on the exciting race, determined to catch up. When his phone started ringing, he used his toe to hit the answer button, followed by the Speaker. “Hey, Eddy, Vanellope’s run into some trouble in the Elevator Tower!” Carol told him.

“What? Vanellope’s helping us in the race.”

“What? She’s not at any race!”

“Then who’s…?”

“Eddy, is that Carol?” Carmine asked the avatar. “What’s wrong with Vanel?”

“Carol says that Vanellope isn’t with us. …It must be an impostor!”

Giant ice cream scoops rolled onto the track, the racers dodging as they searched for shortcuts. Sark gave himself a Place Swap and shot it at Francis, bringing himself closer to Vanellope. The two shared a glance as Vanel secretly gestured him after Quill while she targeted Jenny. Jenny rolled up a slope of spilled ice cream and could race over the vents, forcibly shrinking to enter a vent. They collected a ?-Block with a Mushroom, using it to boost against the vent’s wind. Both girls bore a look of concern after receiving Carmine and Eddy’s message… and when the echoes of an engine were heard behind them, they saw ‘Vanellope’ herself tailing.

The other racers followed the main road, which became narrow with a pit of freezing water surrounding them. The vent that Jenny was traveling in crossed along this room’s ceiling. They used ramps to jump gaps in the pit, but Quill was shot by a Red Shell from Arnold, who passed him. Quill acquired a Red Shell and kept going, but Sark had passed him as well.

The commander smirked as he readied to use his next item: a Gatling Peter. Peter Griffin spawned on the back of his cycle, laughing “Hehehehehehe!” as he fired a gatling at Quill. Quill hastily avoided the gatling and shot the Red Shell, destroying Peter’s gun. As Quill tried to catch up, they had to drift right and enter a freezer of giant ice cream buckets. They curved right, then left to go up a slope, twisting further left—Quill hit a banana that Francis dropped.

Jenny’s vent would exit to this area, keeping her slightly ahead of the racers except for Demetra. She grabbed Triple Green Shells as Miko shot some back at ‘Vanellope.’ The fake racer dodged, glaring as she realized they must’ve determined her secret. Luckily, her item block gave her a Quagmire. “Giggity-giggity-giggity…!” The big-chinned Glenn Quagmire drove beside Vanellope. The lean man would home in on Jenny and Miko and drag them off-screen.

But that was before Demetra suddenly drove back, allowing Quagmire to target her. “YOU OWE ME!” she yelled as she was taken off-screen.

Jenny and Miko shared a worried glance, but kept speeding. They would enter a frosty tunnel as the gravity seemed to twist them around. Streams of chocolate syrup fell from the ceiling (making it seem like they were rising in their vision). Jenny had to perform a tight and constant drift rightward, swirling around and around until they exited out the top. They flipped right-side-up as they launched off a Flight Ramp from a giant mound of swirly ice cream at the roof of the fortress. They flew directly to another swirl, landed, and swirled around it before launching off another Flight Ramp. They would land on an outdoor restaurant where many children were feasting ice cream at tables! As Jenny swerved around the customers, “Ah-HAAAAA!” she screamed at spotting the Crystal Switch over to the left. She swerved wildly on the icy surface and returned to hit the switch.

‘Vanellope’ tried to ram them, but Jenny bent the large shoes to kick and bounce off. The fake growled and saw the other racers heading to the next lap. The road that would return to the start was blocked by a fence, so the racers would slope down a secret hatch into a cavern. “Alright, we only have one switch to find!” Quill said.

“We’ll never let you have the heart!” Sark yelled.

The inside of the Prehistoric Caverns had a glistening crystal ceiling and a jungle. Raptors ran onto the track in attempt to bite the racers, evading as they zoomed up a ramp while seizing ?-Blocks. They would land in a brachiosaurus valley, wherein Quill tried to land on an incoming one’s back, only for Sark to knock him off, ride up the dino’s neck, and hit a Glide Ramp. Quill growled in anger, but noticed he had gotten a Spring Pad. He used this to spring up to the back of another brachiosaur, which had another Glide Ramp.

It would fly them over another drifting zone, but Quill’s particular ramp would lead him to an elevated track to the right of the main track. Whilst the other racers had to jump platforms over a muddy pit, Quill had to jump platforms over a chasm, performing a drift at the same time. A ramp launched him off and perpendicularly on the back of a pterodactyl. As the dactyl’s wings flapped, Quill did a ramp jump off the wing, did the same with another, then hit the Crystal Switch on a platform.

Quill could drop back to the main track, in which they would submerge as propellers replaced their engines. Quill evaded the aquatic dino eels that rose from the ground, but was otherwise worriedly looking for whatever opened up. He drove off a ledge and had to rely on bubble jets to keep him aloft. He saw a tunnel to the right and drove into it. The tunnel led out of the water and onto a bridge that led safely over a field of triceratops. He seized an item block with a single banana.

“Quill! Over there!” Kazma pointed. Quill immediately stopped the kart and looked left and backwards.

The racers would have to drive through the herd of charging triceratops, so none of them would think to make a U-turn and drive toward the large door with four glowing gems. Quill shared a smirk with Kazma and drove off the bridge, heading for that door. Sadly, Sark managed to snipe him with a Green Shell and headed for the door, only for Quill to chuck the banana and snipe him as well. As Quill raced for the doorway, the U-turn Lakitu hovered and gestured him to turn back. Quill shot him a raspberry, passing the stunned Sark. The commander tried to speed after him, but Kazma jumped off his buddy seat and grabbed the enemy Program, beginning to brawl with him.

Quill shot Kazma a thumbs-up and entered the Boss Door. The Guy’s trio tried to drive in after him, but their Safeties forced them back to the track. “Sorry, boys!” Demetra taunted. “No fighting the boss on Safety Mode!”

As Jenny and Miko were outmaneuvering the evil Vanellope, a bunch of cows and birds seemed to come rushing out of the Boss Door. Once they had finished, the door sealed. “Looks like it’s all up to Quill now.” (End song.)

Quill drove down into a cave as the Lakitu was still angrily telling him to turn around. “Whoa!” Quill dodged around a herd of cows and birds, royally baffled by their presence. “Ugh, and would you stop making that noise?!” he yelled at the Lakitu.

“D’ooooohh!” Lakitu growled, speaking in a nasally voice. “You scared all my cows and birds away at the same time! What am I going to feed my T-Roller now?! Wait, I know! I’ll just feed him you!”

Quill watched as Lakitu flew down a ledge to the right of the track. (Play “Boss Battle 2” from Star Fox 64!)

Slowly, a mechanical T-Rex head rose from the cliff. It was followed by the body of a truck with steam engines and four giant wheels. The vehicle jumped and landed on the track ahead of Quill. The Lakitu operated it from a cockpit on its head. “I’ll teach you to break into my secret base! Yaaah!”

Boss fight: T-Roller

The T-Roller shot rapid fireballs from its tail engine, trying to stay lined up with Quill as he swerved to the sides. He couldn’t steer too far to either side lest he fall off the cliff, but when there were lulls in the rounds of fire, he could steer to the other side. Quill hit an item block and earned Triple Green Shells. He fired them at the wheels and caused the mech to sink down, to where its engine was level with Quill. He resumed evading the fire until he could grab another ?-Block, giving him a Fire Flower. It was fitting as he shot the flames at the mech’s tail, destroying it.

The T-Roller kept rolling as its upper portion twisted around, the head facing Quill. It would stretch its head to bite Quill, but he could hit the brakes to get just out of range before resuming pace. Quill saw a Boost Ramp and decided to launch off it—the T-Roller was able to snag him in the air and damage his kart. As Quill landed and recomposed himself, a ?-Block granted him Triple Bananas. He launched a banana as the T-Roller caught and chewed it. Seeing another ramp coming, he leaned right to launch off it, but the T-Roller outpaced him. The dino finished chewing, so Quill shot another banana to bait it. He then launched the third banana behind the Roller, causing its wheels to slip. It began moving slower as Lakitu tried to recalibrate it, so Quill could fly off the Boost Ramp and land his kart forcefully against the cockpit.

A heavy blow was done to the Lakitu, so he furiously launched three Red Shells behind Quill. The shells homed on him, but Quill saw stalactites falling ahead. He drove under the stalactites to make the shells crash into them. The T-Roller faced the opposite way and sped ahead, firing more rounds of fire and dodging stalactites. One of the jagged stones dropped a ?-Block, which gave Quill a Blooper. The Blooper’s ink would blot Lakitu’s vision, driving the T-Roller erratically as stalactites hit his cockpit. The ink wore off as Lakitu ordered his vehicle to leap behind Quill. He seemed to stay a good distance away, but Quill panicked when the Blue Shell was fired.

There were several Dash Panels to help Quill outrun the inevitable shell, its N64 siren sound ringing in his ears. He hit a ?-Block, desperately hoping for a Super Horn… but what he got instead was a Place Swap. Smirking deviously, Quill fired the Swap backwards, hitting T-Roller. He warped behind the mecha-dino, causing the Blue Shell to set its sights on it. The shell flew up and collided epically with the truck’s main body. Its severed head dropped down to connect with the four tires.

The dino faced Quill and would try to slow down and lure him under its head. The head would stretch up and smash down on Quill, but a tight left steer between the tires would evade. The pattern repeated a couple times before Quill seized the ?-Block. Now equipped with a Super Horn, Quill waited for the head to get above him. He honked the horn and blew the tires right off! The head blew ahead and began bouncing along the ground, ready to catch Quill in its jaws. He caught one more ?-Block just in time, giving him a Piranha Plant. The large plant attached to the front of his kart and helped him boost toward the T-Head. The piranha’s jaws munched away at what remained of the mech, tearing it to pieces until the Lakitu was yanked out. (End song.)

“Ehhhh!” The Lakitu landed on one foot and spun around. “All I wanted to do was feed cows and birds to a dino truck. It was a clean fuel source! Why…” He fell over and derezzed.

Two items spawned from where he lay: a Boss Key and an orange heart. Quill walked up to touch the heart: it flashed and soared out of the cave. (Play “Old Site Cassette” from Celeste.)

Miko finished off the fake Vanellope in time to see the Pure Heart fly out of the cave. The entire floor darkened as it whooshed miles away, leaving a blue and pink track in its place. Boly helped to spawn a Hinobi Kart for her to drive.

Miko had to steer left or right when the respective rhythm panels became active or not. She had to launch off a blue ramp when it was active, and it would safely land her on a purple ramp, and the pattern repeated as Miko performed a trick combo to the next track. The track would curve up, right, and vertical as gravity shifted. Miko performed a continuous drift over the changing tiles: because she kept with the rhythm, they would change just as she crossed over. The drift steered leftward as the track was twisting upside-down. It eventually curved back upright as Miko drove to a series of on-and-off walls, which also had spikes on them. Miko drove toward the ones that were active to be ready to pass them when they switched off. For the last leg of the track, Miko would have to go up a set of long stairs, each an alternate color. Miko would have to bounce her kart to get atop these segments. Once successful, she rammed the Pure Heart.

A shockwave crossed the whole floor as 8-bit victory music sounded. Miko felt warm as the orange heart entered her chest. (End song.)

Sark seemed to malfunction from the force of the shockwave, becoming locked in place. Miko came soaring back as light returned to the racing world, with Quill exiting the Boss Room. “Dude, what the heck was that?” Arnold asked.

“Beating a boss, that’s what it was!” Kazma retorted.

“That wasn’t just beating a boss.” Rez said. “You guys know something, don’t you?”

“We know a faster way to fix the game.” Jenny answered.

“You serious?” Francis asked hopefully.

“Yeah. But if you really wanna know, then you have to accept Kazma’s apology.”

“What? Come on, that’s cheap!”

“Then I guess you guys don’t wanna get out of here quicker.” Kazma smirked.

“Fine, we accept your apology!” Rez said. “Now, will you tell us?”

“You don’t sound like you mean it.”

“Man, you’re a dick.” Arnold snapped.

“Okay, fine. If we collect these eight heart things, we can fix the game. Basically, there’s only eight certain bosses we gotta beat, and we defeated two of them.”

“Seriously?! Why didn’t you tell us earlier?”

“Because you guys are jerks. I didn’t want you to have the glory of finding the hearts before we did. I know I picked a fight with your leader, but at least I tried to apologize.”

“Alright, we’re sorry for giving you a hard time.” Francis said, trying to sound as genuine as he could despite his frustration.

“Agh!” Sark seemed to break free of his malfunction, drawing a Light Disc. “So, you’re the carrier of those hearts! Looks like I’ll have to tear you open!”

Arnold drew a thick bo staff and bashed Sark’s head. Sark flipped away and tossed his disc, looping behind Arnold and bashing his head. Francis drew a laser gun to shoot the commander. “Who’s this guy supposed to be, anyway?”

“He’s an enemy glitch!” Miko answered.

“Then we’ll hold him off! Hurry and get going!”

“What do you mean you will?” Quill asked.

“Hey, we may be dorks, but we’re gamers.” Rez reminded him, donning a pair of gauntlets. “We don’t get beaten by CPU!”

“Especially since they got ME to help them!” Demetra declared, taking Sark by surprise as she tossed shock rods at the Program. “But this is another one you owe me.” She winked at Jenny.

“You got it, girl.” Jenny acknowledged. “So, what’s the plan, Quill?”

Though Quill had his concerns, these gamers still had him outnumbered four-to-one. But was their skill really up to the task? It’s not like they were operatives, but-

“You guys better not die!” Kazma told them as if making the decision himself. “And you better run if your HP starts to drop.”

“It’s a deal!” Rez declared, socking Sark in the jaw.

“Alright… we’ll leave it to you.” Quill decided. “And let’s race again sometime!” With that, they mounted their karts and made the drive back to—Quill crossed the Finish Line and triggered the victory music. “HEY, I WON! I guess we never actually finished the race! WOO!”

Demetra passed them a smile as the heroes traveled back to the Elevator Tower. “Your friends are impressive, Miko… but don’t let them hold you back.”

Elevator Tower

The real Vanellope had gotten into battle with a brown-haired man in black armor with yellow circuitry. His Light Disc whirled around him and formed a shield as Vanellope rapidly glitched around him. She tried to zip through an opening, but was knocked back by the disc as her body fizzed erratically. He tried to stomp her, but she had already glitched away to land a kick to the head. “You’re pretty annoying for a glitch that can barely hold her form!”

“And you’re prett—YYYYYYYYYYY…” Her body froze and stalled on this syllable for several seconds, “-or a bad guy!”

The man whose username was CLU kicked Vanellope in the head. “Wherever you came from, it seems this game’s code is too advanced for you!” He threw his disc, but Vanel dodged and zipped around again. When she attempted to kick him, her leg fizzed out, so CLU grabbed her by the neck and choked. “This game is going to be a perfect system! Once we’ve eradicated all you glitches, our plan can finally-”

A blue Light Disc was thrown and hit CLU’s head, dropping Vanellope. “Hey, that’s no way to treat cute characters!”

CLU looked over in anger. “What?! I-It can’t be… who programmed you into this game?”

The man in white armor with blue circuitry flipped over to kick the confused CLU. “Come on, Vanel!” He grabbed her arm and ran away with her. “I know a floor we can hide out on!”

“W-Wait, who are you?!”

“My name is Tron!” He shot her a grin. “At least, I think this is how he’s supposed to look.”

Myujen

The girl in the red school uniform, Maki explored the mall of this extravagant Christmas floor. “Ho ho ho!” laughed the mall Santa with a small Lunarian boy in his lap. “And what would you like to have, little Moonshine02864?”

“I wanna have a big, bouncy moon ball that can bounce me really high!”

“Ho ho! Well, if you look under my magic tree, there might be a surprise for you!”

The boy crawled under the giant tree in the center of the mall. A present materialized with his name on it. Moonshine excitedly unwrapped the box as a large, inflatable moon puffed out of it. “Wow! Thanks, Santa!” He carried the ball outside gleefully.

Maki was the next person in line. “Hello, young lady! What’s your username?”

Maki lashed her leg and sent a Tempest Kick. The kick passed Santa and cut the trunk of the tree. The tree slowly toppled over and crushed Santa under its ornaments. Maki had already dodged it and was walking away.

The ominous “Here Comes Trouble” music from Banjo resounded as the mall darkened. Santa Claus rose from the tree, his eyes shining with malice as he levitated. His voice echoed with omniscience. “Now, LISTEN here, you little bitch! I work my jolly old ass off to make these kids happy, so I don’t like it when entitled little tramps waltz in here and cut down my damn tree!”

“Don’t act so proud. Your gifts are all phony, off-brand products. They all conk out within an hour’s time, and they’ve caused some cocky players to die. You’re going to pay for what you’ve done.”

“Well, EXCUSE me for taking a few shortcuts when I’ve got ten trillion gifts to create! Those little shits would’ve gotten tired of them in a day’s time, anyway. What else do you expect me to do when all I get are milk and cookies for a salary?!”

“Maybe you should’ve found a better job.”

“Oh, I’m about to enjoy my job quite a lot as I mount your head on the back of my one horse open sleigh. Come at me, you motherfucker!”

To summarize the fight, Santa Claus shot lasers from his eyes, Maki returned Finger Pistols, then he charged at her belly first, to which she used Iron Body with her sharp fingers aimed forward to puncture his belly. Santa would later start riding above on his sleigh and drop present bombs, which Maki would grab and throw back to damage him. Santa would start driving on land as the reindeer tried to ram her, but by kicking off Rudolph’s nose, the reindeer would be steering aimlessly and crashing into columns. Maki eventually won by giving a grenade to a dimwitted reindeer, who would deliver it to Santa as a present, exploding them.

The student assassin walked out of the mall with the Boss Key in hand. “Two down…”

“Hey! Maki Roll! There you are!”

“?!” She gasped, seeing a thin man in a purple coat running over. He was an alien with a hood and a single eye that resembled a planet. “Kaito?! Is that you?!”

“Yeah, I’ve been looking everywhere for you! As soon as I heard what happened, I had to be here and protect you!”

“What?! You knew we were trapped in the game and you came in, anyway?! You idiot!”

“Don’t call me an idiot! I wasn’t gonna let some game scare me. Or my name isn’t Kaito Momota, Luminary of the Stars!”

“God, I can’t stand you sometimes.” Maki stomped away in a huff.

“Relax, Maki, I have Miu watching over me. …Though in hindsight, that might’ve been a mistake.”

“THAT is the mistake?!”

“Look, we’re gonna get you out of here! Miu says that all games have a Code Room somewhere, and if we found that, we could probably do something.”

“I wouldn’t know anything about that. But as far as we know, the only way to escape is to defeat the 100 bosses.”

“A hundred bosses in one game? Geez, these developers don’t respect players’ time. Fine, so where do we start?”

“I’ve already started, but you’re staying somewhere safe! You know you’re not built for combat.”

“I am now. I gave myself spacebending!” He shot a Starburst skyward.

“That won’t help when you don’t know how to use it!”

“Are you okay, Maki? You seem stressed out.”

“YOU THINK?!” She whipped around with raging eyes. “I’ve been wandering around for over a day without sleep, only able to find two damn bosses, and all of a sudden YOU’RE here and…and…” Losing the will to argue, Maki sighed and embraced him in a hug. “I’m glad to see you…”

“Hey, chin up.” Kaito hugged her back. “What happened to those other assassins, anyway?”

“I wanted to work alone.”

“Well, it’s no wonder you’re all grouchy! Games are more fun when you have someone to share your frustration with!”

“This ‘game’ is hardly fun, and far above frustrating.”

“Yeah, but it’s still important to take breaks. Why don’t we see what this game passes for food?”

“I’m not low on HP, and it’s not like my actual body absorbs the nutrition.”

“Nonsense! If you believe that it’s real food, then your body will believe it, too!”

“That makes absolutely no sense.”

“You’ll understand someday, Maki! Now, let’s look for a restaurant!” Kaito ran off eagerly.

“Great… now I have to babysit this idiot. …Well, that should make this job a bit more enjoyable.” Maki smiled and followed him.

Gun Gale

Sector SA’s group engaged in combat in a field of giant lava lamps, containing their blue and pink colors, and stairs led to different floors. Nagisa ran out onto the field, shooting his twin pistols, and as he expected, Morgiana ran out to engage him, kicking her ankle cannons. Nagisa nimbly dodged her attacks and shot at her, but Morgiana wasn’t slow herself. She was then struck from behind by Killua’s yo-yos, which would shoot ink everywhere from their spinning. Morg growled and leapt away, showing frustration while the boys smirked.

“They’re annoying, aren’t they?” Constanyou remarked, sending small robots out to try and explode the boys, but they easily leapt away.

“Yeah.” Morg sent kicks at Millium when she slid by. Sinon perched herself on a high point and tried to snipe them, but Morg grabbed Constan and leapt behind a lava lamp. “Honestly, I love Nagisa, but he’s too close to Killua for his own good.”

“Amanda hangs out with a few bad boys herself. Anyway, here’s the plan.”

Goombella ran out to shoot her Head Cannon at Millium, the Inkling evading and returning fire as the two tiny members engaged. Sinon let them be and shot other areas of the lower field. After Constan gained enough charge, she activated Inkjets and flew up to blast at Sinon. Sinon hid behind a lava lamp, so Constan decided to shoot down at Killua. He ran up the stairs in evasion, but Morg suddenly leapt down and kicked him off, having already climbed a chain to get up there. She stomped Killua’s face with a blast of ink to accompany it, splatting him as he warped back to the start. “Looks like you’re discovering a new kink, Morgie!”

“I’ll kill you when you step out of there!” Morgiana switch on her power-up, growing a giant pair of boots to stomp around and leaving a large trail. Nagisa had escaped into a small corridor on the side of the field, but Morg was able to fit into that corridor and cover his blue trail. The corridor led up and exited to the second floor. As soon as the power-up wore off, Nagisa ambushed and shot his girlfriend. Morg swung a kick, but Nagisa leapt while dropping some small bombs on the floor. Morg stepped on one as it popped, then Nagisa Shaved behind to shoot her head and splat her.

Around the same time, Goombella managed to splat Millium. Mayyouperish was trying to keep Killua confined to his base, but the boy splatted her with his yo-yos, only to suffer a snipe from Sinon and be sent back to base, anyway. During this period, only four players were active on the field.

“Hey, what’s happening?” Sinon asked as the level began to glitch.

The other players were concerned by the occurrence. It was already weird that the game had been extended to 15 minutes, but with only three minutes of the game remaining, what could be happening?

An eerie red shade covered the field as the sound of galloping could be heard. “That sound…” Sinon whispered, pulling her head away from her scope. She felt a shadow over her… and her pupil receded in horror as she turned her head.

A huge figure in a dark cloak and mechanical skull loomed above her on a horse, his red eyes shining. “WHAT?!” Nagisa screamed. “What is…”

“The Reaper?!” Chadley gasped.

“Huh?!” Fie was startled awake. “Whoa, where’d he come from?!”

“I am the harbinger of death…” the Reaper spoke in a loudish, monotone voice. “The black ink that blots out the color of life. I am… DEATH GUN.”

“That name is uncreative!” Goombella panicked. “But is that the boss?! I thought he wasn’t supposed to appear in Turf Wars!”

“It must be a glitch!” Chadley configured.

The Reaper made a Cross gesture with his arm. He slowly withdrew a gun from his cloak and pointed at Sinon. …Just the sight of that very weapon filled her with pure dread. Is that…Is that a Type 54 “Black Star”?! No… why that gun… Why that gun?!

A memory flashed in her mind of a young black-haired girl, crying as she clutched such a gun in her hands.

Death Gun pulled the trigger and fired a jut of black ink, blotting the spot where Sinon previously lay. …Nagisa had seized Sinon in the blink of an eye and carried her several feet away, aiming his guns at the Reaper. Death Gun rode around them on his horse and tried to shoot Nagisa, the boy dodging and returning shots in turn. A respawned Morgiana flew up to kick the Reaper in the head, but felt her foot sprain from his metallic skull. It seemed only a tiny fragment of HP depleted.

Death Gun disappeared, the group keeping guards raised in search for him. “AAAH!” May screamed from down below as Death Gun spawned near and almost shot her, but Millium surfed by and pulled her out of harm’s way. Fie was desperately trying to break the barrier that blocked off the audience. “Millium, just get out of there!”

“But it’s just ink!” Millium yelled, trying to shoot the boss. “We still shouldn’t be able to die in this game, right?!”

The horse galloped around, charging at Killua as Death Gun shot at him. He dodged easily and dealt a Tempest Kick, but only a fairly small amount of health fell. Death Gun warped again, this time appearing behind Constan. Her expression was of horror as the Reaper loomed over her. Morgiana stomped Death’s head, and he began galloping again as they all tried to surround and shoot him. Killua tackled the horse from the front, with Nagisa helping to restrain it. “Sinon!”

Sinon locked on the Reaper from her perch, her rifle quivering. It was just a game… she had to shoot him… He wasn’t a real person, right? But his threat was real… it felt real… it felt…

“Come on, kid, give it back!” The ugly-faced robber demanded as he wobbled his way to the child, the gun suspended in her small hands.

Sinon grit her teeth and fired, hitting Death Gun’s head. He lost about as much health as when Killua hit him. He galloped away and teleported again, spawning up at Sinon’s level. She was frozen in fear as he readied his gun, but it was then that Constan switched on her Inkjets to fly up and shoot him. He shifted focus to Constan, galloping as he fired black ink bullets, with one soaking her leg. When Constan’s Inkjet wore off, she grunted as she tried to hoist herself on one leg, as if the other one was already-

…

…

She went deaf as another load of ink soaked her head, the force knocking her over on the floor. Horrified, the others rushed up to attack the Reaper.

Constanyou cracked open her green eyes, absorbing the last ounces of light. The black ink slowly seeped over her irises, and was spreading to her body. “No… I don’t… wanna die… Aman…da… Ak…ko…”

When the timer for the Turf War finally ended, Death Gun vanished. The lighting returned to normal, so they believed he had left for sure. But with pure despair, they looked over their teammate’s blackened body… as it derezzed into a puddle. “CONSTANZE!!” Morgiana screamed.

Luna Nova Academy

An explosion went off in one of the dorms. The girls of Sector LN were pale as their short-sized friend lay with a head covered in soot, her widened eyes void of life. “CONSTAAAAAAAANZE!” Akko’s voice reverberated throughout the entire academy.

“It exploded!” Jasminka cried. “Why did it explode?! I swear I didn’t use any magic, I didn’t even touch it!”

“AAAAAAHH!” Amanda cried. “I knew we should’ve tried to take it off! Why didn’t we try, Diana, why?!” She tugged on her leader’s shirt out of anger.

“We couldn’t be sure without testing!” Diana argued through her tears. “The other helmets were immune to magic, and we couldn’t just test it on somebody without… I’m so sorry, Amanda!”

“Then I should’ve gone in and looked for her! God dammit, Constanze!”

“Constanze…” Lotte sobbed against Sucy’s cloak. “You were so sweet… such a dependable friend… you didn’t deserve this…sniff…”

“Constanze…” Akko sobbed. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t help you…”

Luna Nova didn’t see the moon that night. The heavens were as clouded as their hearts. The students would sleep somberly once they heard the news about Constanze, the most gifted magitech genius in school. She spoke few words, but now would never speak again…

Chapter Text

This chapter brings back a certain character who appeared in Newbie’s Quest!

Gun Gale

The whole city was in a frenzy over what just transpired in the Turf War. Normally, the children’s games for Gun Gale were never broadcasted on the in-game news, only the Gun About battles, but since those had been postponed, the Turf Wars were their only source of trigger-happy entertainment. But all the TVs were forcibly tuned in to that channel to broadcast the event.

Sector SA’s group were loitering by the wall on the H.Q.’s pavilion. Millium was patting Goombella’s head in comfort. Fie and Sinon could see the pain in their eyes as their heads hung. “That girl was… a friend of yours?” Fie asked.

“She was an operative from Sector LN.” Morgiana answered. “Her and I worked together for a short time. It isn’t like we were particularly close, but…”

“It doesn’t make it any less painful.” Nagisa sighed. “Just knowing that she’s dead… and we watched…”

Sinon bit her lip, her heart swelling with guilt. “I’m sorry… even when I shot him, it did nothing… I didn’t get stronger at all…”

“What do you mean you didn’t get stronger?” Goombella asked. “It isn’t your fault this happened. If anything, it’s ours.”

“I…”

“Ha ha ha ha ha ha.”

The air turned red as the group whipped around. The surrounding crowds turned as Infinite himself spawned on the pavilion. “It’s Infinite!” a Fongoid man screamed. “Is he going to erase the avatars on this floor?!”

“I ain’t turning back into my puny Terachnoid self!” an Agorian yelled. “Let’s get outta here!”

While the crowds fled from the scene, Sector SA readied their selves as Infinite approached them with a glaring eye. “It seems you made the news again. What perfect timing…”

“You had that monster attack us on purpose?!” Goombella yelled.

“All I did was hack the game to make him spawn in the Turf Wars. The players here seemed a little too safe for my tastes, so I gave them some incentive to hunt down the boss for this floor. I certainly didn’t expect him to appear for Scheherazade’s friends~”

“Of course.” Goombella rolled her eyes.

“What’s he mean by that?” Sinon asked, holding her rifle in a quivering manner.

“They were all over the news a while back.” Fie replied.

“But I don’t see Scheherazade among you.” Infinite mustered a red, digital orb in his hand. “Unless it’s one of you!” The orb became a huge ray that enveloped the group. Millium’s avatar shattered as she grew to Fie’s height, and Sinon’s shattered as well.

Sinon’s cyan hair and eyes had changed to black. She wore a long-sleeved, comfy pajama shirt with white sleeves and a light-brown torso, along with short black shorts. Her legs were otherwise bare, feeling a chill on them as she felt unbalanced. The group was surprised by how different and ordinary she looked compared to the cool and composed military avatar that was her guise.

“Not here, eh? Then perhaps she isn’t logged into the game at all.”

“You’re about to be logged out yourself!” Killua dashed at Infinite, his sharp fingers imbued with lightning as he tried to slash him. Killua’s body glitched and froze just centimeters from him, so Fie leapt to slash Infinite with daggers. He dodged the blades while making little motion, and a force of power blew the assassins away.

“Did you forget what I can do?” Infinite willed a swarm of robots to spawn on the street. “I control everything in this world!”

“No you don’t!” Morgiana declared, she and Nagisa linking hands.

“AAAAAAAHHHH!” The couple unleashed a combined explosion of Fear and soundbending, exploding the robots.

“Gah!” Infinite had to shut his ears from the noise. He willed tape to spawn over their mouths, but he was then stabbed in the back by sharp shards from the robots’ remains. They were controlled by Goombella’s psychicbending.

“So, it is possible to hurt him!” Goombella observed.

“What good do you think it’ll do?!” Infinite shouted as he willed the damage to heal.

Nagisa and Morg teared their tape off and unleashed another combined scream to stun him, while Killua rushed behind to pierce his back. Infinite willed a rubbery substance to form and trap Killua, leaving Fie to attempt an attack. “Hey, Sinon!”

She gasped, just now spotting Goombella down by her right. Luckily, Nagisa and Morg focused most of their sound over Infinite, so her voice was audible. “Try to shoot that gem on his chest! It might be a source of power!”

Sinon noticed the red egg on Infinite’s chest. “I…I…” The rifle trembled in her ordinary human hands.

“Want me to lift you to a good vantage point?”

That wasn’t the problem. Seeing herself in ordinary clothes, holding a gun… a gun that could actually kill… with a good shot, she could kill Infinite… she could kill…

“Come on, kid, give it back!” the ugly-faced man demanded.

“YAH!” Infinite trapped their heads in metal helmets and stopped the screaming. “You’ll pay for your insolence!” He lunged at the group with fury.

It was then that Chadley, the white-haired boy in geeky attire, leapt in and slashed Infinite with a white lightsaber. “I shall divert his attention whilst you make your retreat!” he yelled in his matter-of-fact tone.

“Chadley?!” Goombella gasped. “No, you’ll get killed!”

Infinite tried to bind the boy in chains, but Chadley cut himself free and swung a slash at Infinite’s egg. “AGH!” He cried out in pain as the bonds holding Sector SA derezzed.

“Entrust this to me! I would advise you search for the boss before it hurts anyone else on this floor!”

Infinite conjured another swarm of robots as they fired bullets at Chadley, the boy stylishly whirling his lightsaber to deflect them. “Sinon, maybe you can get a shot now!” Nagisa suggested.

“N-No… I…I can’t do it!” She clenched her rifle in total panic.

Nagisa saw the terror in her eyes and the faults in her posture. She must have felt very naked and powerless in her homey attire, much like most of the players on Floor 1. He saw Killua attempt to land a sneak attack on Infinite’s egg, but he was stopped before he could, so Infinite landed a kick that depleted most of Killua’s HP. “Everyone, retreat! Morg, carry Sinon!”

“Right!” Morgiana lifted the sniper in her arms and dashed up the street.

“Chadley, run away as soon as you get a chance to!” Killua shouted, following his friends.

“You do not have to be concerned for my wellbeing.” Chadley said, dealing a flurry of cuts to Infinite.

“No! Why can’t my bending stop you?!”

“The answer is simple.” Chadley leapt away and held his sword composedly. “Your skill is inferior to mine.”

“Are you calling me WEAK?!”

“Yes, that is an accurate synonym.”

“You… just who ARE YOU?!”

…

Sector SA retreated several blocks down and hid in an alleyway. “Well, that was almost a disaster.” Millium sighed, still showing a hint of cheeriness in her voice despite her downtrodden feelings. “Are you sure we should’ve left him?”

“It’s weird that he was able to attack Infinite so easily.” Fie said. “Maybe Chadley was some kind of guardian Program? He did seem pretty knowledgeable on this game’s rules.”

“Either way, I hope he survives.” Nagisa replied. “I guess we oughta do what he said and search for the boss.”

Morg had set Sinon down. “Are you okay?”

“No. I can’t…I can’t do this, anymore. I’m going to an inn.” She was about to leave the alley—flinching as she stepped in a puddle.

“You’re leaving?” Killua asked. “I thought you were training to fight the boss?”

“And my training got me nowhere!” She turned back in aggravation. “My life was threatened… someone died… and I nearly threatened someone else. No matter how many players I shoot online… it doesn’t make the pain go away.”

“Sinon…” Goombella said, sympathy glimmering in her eyes. She could feel that something deep was troubling her.

Sinon’s dilated pupils told Killua everything. “…You killed someone, didn’t you?”

“?!” Her pupils creased even further at his blunt statement. She saw Nagisa’s eyes widen slightly, with everyone else showing a hint of realization. “Killua!” Morg hissed.

“Those eyes… they’re not from just watching someone be killed. They’re racked with guilt.”

“!!” Sinon whirled around and bolted up the street.

Morgiana socked Killua on the crown. “Why couldn’t you keep that to yourself?!”

“I had to know for sure… and now I do.”

“You could’ve at least told us to leave! That was just insensitive!”

“I was sort of thinking we could empathize with her or something. That’s what friends do.”

“We’ve only known her a day!” Goombella shouted. “That’s hardly enough time for sensitive backstories!”

“Yeah, Goombella.” Nagisa replied. “What we should’ve done is snuck home with her and eavesdropped on her sensitive home life.”

“What?!” The Goomba flushed. “Ah- I-… Well, I learned that was wrong! Why even bring that up?!”

“Okay, I’m feeling a little uncomfortable.” Millium said. “So, are we gonna apologize to her or what?”

“I think she’s going to want some personal space.” Morg replied. “As for us… we have to take down that boss.”

“I’m sort of low on HP.” Killua said. “I kinda need an inn myself.”

Morg shot him a glare. “Why don’t we find a restaurant instead?” Nagisa suggested. “We can get HP from eating food as well. We should also get some directions to Dead Man Valley. That’s where the Reaper is based, right?”

“That’s what Sinon said.” Goombella remembered. The group could only feel bad for their acquaintance. While they were internally curious on her background, it was best not to bother her any further.

Elevator Tower

“According to Carol, the real Vanellope was ambushed by some kind of security guard on Floor 13, while she was going to meet Raleigh.” Eddy explained as they rushed into the tower. “But suddenly, another man in similar armor showed up to save her. He called himself Tron.”

“Tron? Like, from that old Space Paranoids game?” Miko asked.

“I think Disney owns that company now.” Kazma replied, now reverted to his human form. “This game is sponsored by Disney, so it makes sense he’s here.”

“Hmmm…I was thinking of a different Tron.” Jenny replied.

“Anyway, he took Vanellope to Level 38, but the security guard is still chasing them. Let’s head up to help them!”

“Technically down, since we’re on Floor 51.” Miko corrected.

“Miko, I am detecting a Pure Heart on Level 38 as well.”

“Really? That really works out! Heh, we’ll be finished with the game in no time!”

The team found an empty elevator and enjoyed a leisurely ride down. The sun was beginning to set over the realms of Aincrad. Floor 48, Lindarth, was a valley of giant waterwheel structures. Level 46, Ant Hill, was a valley of ant hills, beehives, and any other bug nest, where players were required to be scaled down to explore the land of bugs. Floor 40, Jaileum, was a dark, maximum security prison where players had to utilize stealth abilities.

Jenny stood near Kazma as the latter leaned against the wall. “…Hey. Thanks for sticking up for me back there.”

“Huh?” She turned to him. “Oh, you’re welcome. Though to be honest, I think all four of you were being immature.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Frankly,” Quill said, “if you’re an enemy to all the famous gamers, that’s gonna make us their enemies, too.”

“I don’t hate all of them.”

“Pfft, which ones DON’T you hate?” Miko snickered. “Like, I saw a couple videos where people make fun of you, and-”

“Okay, just shut up. But I’m serious. I didn’t hate Chiaki.”

“Who’s Chiaki?” Jenny asked.

“She was the Number One gamer a few years ago.” Eddy answered. “But she died in an accident. I sort of liked her, too.” He smiled. “She had, like, a jillion subscribers, but she was…”

“Different.” Kazma finished for him. “She was nice…”

Year 2032

Kazma hated popular people. He hated the cool kids at his school and he hated the popular gamers online. The jealous 10-year-old recorded his own playthroughs and showed off his epic skills, hoping to land just as many subscribers. He scored quite a handful, but they were nothing in comparison to the amount they had. What made them so special? Their commentary was hardly even that funny, and some of them were plain disrespectful to the games they played!

Especially her… that girl who called herself “Usami,” but was known in gaming circles as Chiaki Nanami. She had a ton of followers for her cute, soft-sounding voice, and in some of her face reveals, she was undeniably cute with her dark-green kitten hoodie and unique pale mauve hair, with pale peach eyes. But her commentary was so tasteless! It was dull and rid of emotion! She was killer at all the games she played and wiped the floor with anyone, but she expressed little joy or interest in them. She was so good at the games that she began to look down on them. They were as second nature to her as the ability to walk.

So one day, the immature boy decided to be brave and type an angry comment on one of her videos. “God, I can’t stand your voice! This game is awesome and you sound like you don’t give a crap! Why do you even play these games if they bore you?!”

It was his first time expressing such frustration on a comment… though he didn’t see anything wrong with it. It was no different from getting mad at someone in real life… except they didn’t have about a thousand people to defend them. Kazma was bombarded with angry replies from a ton of Chiaki’s fans. All full of swear words, death threats, and unbridled spite. Just seeing all these words made his head swell with mental pain.

But before he knew it, all those comments disappeared. Some were still trying, but they would follow suit. Then… Usami herself replied to him. I’m sorry if I’m not giving this game justice. I agree, it’s really amazing. And I’m sorry for my voice.

Kazma wasn’t sure how to react. After everyone else hated him… she was thankful? No, it had to be sarcasm, surely. There’s no way she would listen to one angry commenter while she got praise from everyone else.

But by the time of her next video, she tried to add a little more flare to her voice. It was a speedrun, but she tried to dedicate time to talking about the elements that she liked, and the parts of the game she felt bad for skipping over. She started to sound genuinely enjoyed… as if she actually took his words to heart.

Or maybe someone else made this suggestion in a nicer way. Or it was just coincidence. It would certainly feel too awkward to ask directly, so he merely kept watching her videos.

However, during one Saturday afternoon… Kazma saw a comment on one of his videos. It came from Usami. That’s a pretty clever trick! Not too many know about that.

He blushed at the compliment. And he was royally stunned that someone as popular as her would comment on him. He replied back, “Yeah, it felt cool when I figured it out. You like this game?”

Of course! I like all games.

“Really? Not many people like this game, for some reason.”

It’s because it has a bunch of bugs and glitches. But that’s never really bothered me. I know how to avoid the bad glitches and use the helpful ones. And even with these problems, it still feels like the developers put a lot of heart in this game.

He really couldn’t believe he was having a conversation with her. About this game, no less. “…Yeah! And the glitches are funny! That’s why I like it!”

That’s good. I love how passionate you are about these games.

“You watched other videos?”

Yeah, but I couldn’t think of what to comment on. Pardon my asking, but how old are you? I’m just curious.

“I’m 10. Ten and awesome!”

You’re quite skilled for your age. I’m 13 myself.

Kazma narrowed his eyes. She was probably being condescending, like a big sister. When this thought crossed his mind, he grew frustrated, and decided to ask her directly. “You’re mad about that comment, aren’t you?”

You mean that first comment? No, I appreciated the criticism. No one’s ever complained about my voice before.

He just couldn’t read this girl at all. Was she being sarcastic or just plain clueless? He hardly knew of anyone that would accept negative comments so positively. “Why did you delete all those other comments?”

They were saying awful things. Did you want me to leave them up?

“Not really… but weren’t those people on your side?”

I don’t know any of them. They never leave me anything aside from simple, one-liner praise. Granted, some of my friends saw the comment and tried to offer me condolences, but I wasn’t offended. I was glad to hear that I wasn’t perfect.

“Why would you like that?”

I’ve been great at games ever since I was little. It didn’t take long for me to build up high scores or understand the mechanics. And ever since, people revered me. Videogames are my life, and I barely look at anything else. Games are so natural to me that I can’t help but feel bored. I love all the games that I play, but it’s hard to express that love when I can’t even get frustrated. But after seeing your comment and watching your videos, I’m kind of remembering that love.

“…” Kazma was at a loss for words. He didn’t quite understand her plight… but at the same time, her words felt so honest. So friendly. So different. “…Well, thanks!” was the only lame thing he could say.

Afterwards, Kazma watched one of her face reveal videos, where Chiaki simply showed off her game collection. Her face was pale and voice soft and neutral… but Kazma’s tan face was flushed with emotion. He smiled like a dopey schoolboy in love. She was so cute… and her words so pure.

For the next couple years, Kazma kept watching her videos. They talked a little bit, but Chiaki was mostly preoccupied with school and other friends. It didn’t bother him too much as he was only happy watching her videos, and thankful when she watched his. …Then, in 2034, the news hit.

Video footage of a gigantic hand tearing Towa City out of the planet flooded the news stations. Kazma was aware that that was Chiaki’s hometown… but surely, she would be fine. She would eventually upload a video of this incident, showing she was okay and asking for help.

Everyone, I have terrible news. Usami is dead. She was running out of the arcade when the disaster hit. Some buildings fell, and a huge piece of rubble fell on her. I won’t describe how she looked, but let us pay our respects.

This was the latest comment on her homepage. The message would sweep across the gaming communities. “…” Kazma couldn’t bring himself to leave a comment. He crawled over to his futon and pulled himself under the covers. He hugged a stuffed, white bunny angel, which Chiaki had used as her avatar, tightly to his chest.

Present time

“Hey, Kazma, you okay?” Jenny asked, seeing a droll look in his eye.

“Huh? Y-Yeah, what?”

“You sorta went dead. I thought you were about to say something about Chiaki.”

“What was the accident?” Quill asked.

“Forget about it.” Kazma stated. “I think we’re here.”

Turning to the elevator window, it seemed they had arrived at a city of giant music instruments and neon buildings under a night sky. “Now arriving on Level 38: Danceopolis!” Boly announced.

The floor felt rather lively with music of all genres. In one corner, there was a piano hall, another had a jazz hall, and several of the players were carrying instruments of their choosing. “Yeah, I can dig this!” Kazma nodded, their central square hearing a faint mixture of all the tunes.

“The music floor! Nice!” Miko rocked to her air guitar. “Call me biased, but I got a soft spot for rhythm games!”

“I don’t exactly play music games, but I like me some good VGM.” Eddy smiled. “Now, we need to find Vanellope. Carol says that ‘Tron’ is taking her to Karaoke Tower.”

“Is this a map of the floor?” Carmine asked, leading them to a large board. “The Karaoke Tower is north-northeast, I think.”

“I don’t suppose the Pure Heart is in that direction, too, Boly?”

“The Pure Heart is approximately 5,000 feet above said direction.”

“YO, that’s way too high!” Miko jumped. “Are there like Sky Islands or something?”

“Data unavailable.”

“We can ask around once we head over.” Jenny affirmed. “Let’s go while we got this groove goin’!” (Play “Rhythm Jump Studio” from Hat in Time!)

Stage 5: Danceopolis

Mission: Locate Vanellope and Tron!

Jenny, Eddy, and Quill took a lower route through the roads while the others took a more fun route. Similar to the blue and purple platforms Miko was previously using, she, Kazma, and Carmine jumped up a stairway of these platforms to cross a canal. They landed on the roof of a small building where Groovebots spun into digitization. They danced around the trio while swiftly evading their attacks, but when Miko tried to match their groove, she was able to kick one off its feet, perform a flip, and smash its head. “Kazma, on you!” She flashed him back into his rabbit form as he did a breakdance to take down the 2nd robot, while Carmine flicked a bomb with the rhythm to destroy the third.

A yellow Pixl that resembled a note flew out. “Oh, I bet this’ll be fun!” Miko beamed as she absorbed the Piccolo. She cast a Song Road from her glove as the three surfed across it. They each had to jump over spiky notes in conjunction with the music, a relatively simple feat as the sheet landed them on the end of a walkway. The walkway was rotating in the air, and they would have to jump to corresponding ones when they circled by. Should they wait too long, a wall would boop into solidity and push them off. They could eventually rest on a rooftop before balancing over a wire.

Music notes were floating over the wire, beeping in and out, but would electrify them while they were solid. It was easy to jump or pass through the first sets of notes, until they would have to jump to floating trampolines with several notes to impede them. Kazma held the girls in his arms, relying on the rabbit’s jumps to carry them up the trampolines. They landed on another wire and had to jump through two rows of notes, each active at different intervals. Kazma timed it to jump past the first set, with the rhythm switching off the second set in time to make it through. The last wire carried them to a rooftop with another Piccolo.

“Our next song will be the classic, ‘Don’t Start Unbelieving’! Featuring ShootingStar!”

A nearby TV displayed the karaoke stage, where a tall, thin girl with white hair, horns, and glistening silvery-blue skin that glittered like stars took the stand. She wore a sweater with an almost photorealistic design of a comet. She spoke in an energetic, loudish voice. “Thank you, thank you! We’re not as popular as we were four years ago, but these stars still have a little light! And here to serve as my backup dancer, it’s Little Dipper!”

The camera tilted down at a gnome, roughly the height of her knees (due to his pointed hat that was shaped like a pine tree). “I lost a bet, so I got stuck with this body!” he declared in a more normal voice.

As ShootingStar began a song, the world rumbled as the cone-shaped Karaoke Tower seemed to twist and rise. “Boly, you said the heart was really high up in that direction. I bet that tower will help us get to it!”

“But what’s making it rise?” Kazma wondered.

Miko used the Piccolo to conjure a series of neon Barrel Cannons. The trio grouped into one, but a fountain of notes threatened to fly up and destroy it. At the same time, a separate row was floating by the next cannon. They would shoot at the sound of the “DUN” in the music, and would follow this rhythm as necessary with the other cannons. Ra-da DUN…DUN… dun, dun, DUN. Ra-da DUN…DUN… ra-dun, dun, DUN!

They landed on a platform before a multi-colored tiled floor. There was a screen above it with red, green, and blue displayed. The trio each chose one of these tiles and jumped on it. Afterwards, yellow, purple, and blue were shown, so they jumped to either of those tiles. Once they were past this puzzle, they jumped onto a giant record. As it spun and carried them, a band of XANA Megatanks rolled onto the record. The large, black balls would open up and expand red barriers in attempt to push them off. When the trio tried to pursue around the record’s flow, the Megatanks simply rolled to the other side. They remained a good distance away and baited the robots into shooting their barriers, while Carmine rolled her bombs around the record. They rolled under the open Megatanks and exploded them.

The robots released a Carrie, which would allow them to jump some upturned record needles. The needles would bob down with the weight of their jumps, and they used this function to perform momentum jumps to higher needles. They landed at the top of a slanted piano road, very slippery as their Carrie quickly slid down. They couldn’t jump early with the notes hanging overhead, but they could do so at the end, landing on a stairway of notes they could jump up. At the top, they slid down another piano road, followed by one more before landing on a platform. They would have to cross another tiled floor, but the indicator screen was glitching and rapidly changing colors. There was a Pause Switch atop that screen, and Miko could balance a wire to climb up to it. The switch Paused the screen on yellow, orange, and red, so the group jumped these tiles and avoided electrocution.

They landed on a platform at the back of a huge crowd. Miko’s U.I. rang as she answered a call from Quill. “Guys, we found Vanellope! Where are you?”

“We’re in the audience of the Karaoke Tower. We’re gonna try to figure out how to reach the heart.”

…

“We’ll try to regroup with you in a bit.” Quill replied before hanging up. He, Eddy, and Jenny saw Vanellope and Tron hiding behind some trashcans near the audience, the blue glow of the latter’s suit giving away their position.

“I wonder why this game has trashcans?” Tron thought aloud. “Couldn’t they just program dropped scrap to disappear?”

“Learn to appreciate the aesthetics, man.” Vanel remarked.

“Hey, Vanellope!”

They looked around with a light gasp. “Hey, it’s Sector Q!” Vanel declared as she eagerly jogged up to them. Behind her was a floating, holographic camera lens.

“Vanellope!” Eddy greeted. “I’m guessing Carol’s behind you for real this time?”

“Yes, Eddy, it is actually Vanellope this time.” The camera sounded with Carol’s voice.

“Greetings, friends!” Tron stood and approached them with a smile. “You must be Vanellope’s user acquaintances!”

“Are you really Tron?”

“Don’t be silly.” Vanel sneered. “It’s just Tronta from GKND!”

“That’s what I figured.” Jenny nodded.

“Hahaha! It was a good chance to get into the act. Except now it’s Halloween all over again.”

“But what was that Carol was telling me about a fake Vanel?”

“We’re still wondering that ourselves.” Jenny replied. “She was just a rogue glitch that looked like you. You think that Hinobi programmed copies of you into the game? You are a pretty classic character.”

“But why would she act like she knew us?” Quill asked.

“Hmmm…” Vanellope narrowed her eyes in thought. “Does Infinite have other people working with him? Besides Eggman?”

“You mean like other Programs or users? There was also that Sark guy from the race.”

“Yeah, but not just any Programs. I wonder if-”

“THERE you are!” They whipped around, seeing CLU accompanied by a team of guards in similar orange armor, wielding two-sided lightsabers. “Glitch!”

“Another evil Program!” Eddy drew his sword.

“Move aside, kids! That girl was illegally uploaded into the game! In fact…” CLU noticed the holo-camera behind Eddy. “You don’t seem natural either!”

“Is he some sort of security Program?”

“Guys, meet us at the backstage!” Tron yelled, lifting Vanellope. He attached two Light Discs to his shoes to make them wheels. “We have allies here!” He zoomed off, leaving twin blue streaks.

CLU materialized a Light Cycle from a small stick and rode after them.

…

Miko shuffled her way through the crowd of aliens as ShootingStar’s song was reaching a finale. Kazma had lifted Carmine onto his tall shoulder so she didn’t get lost, the two following the highlights of Miko’s violet hair. She wasn’t sure who to ask for clues, so she would select a random person in her vision.

Her eyes fell to the back of a red, long-sleeved hoodie. Miko assumed it was a girl, judging by the short white skirt. Her long legs were a minty green, and she wore darker-green shoes. It also seemed she was hunched over with her arms positioned up, in which her oversized sleeves hung down.

Miko simply walked up and tapped her shoulder. “Excuse me?”

The girl turned with a gasp. She had blue hair under her hood and wide round glasses. “Yeah, what?” she asked in a slight nervous tone.

“We saw that tower rise up a minute ago. We’re new here, so you know what that’s about?”

“Uh, th-they’re making the tower rise with Music Chi. They think if it gets high enough, it’ll open a secret area. If it goes too long without music, then it just sinks down…”

“So, only musicbenders can do that?”

“N-No no, no… I think anyone can…” She was nervously turning away.

“Ah, okay!” Miko perked up, ready to march toward the stage. “That must be how we…?” She stopped herself, raising a curious brow. “…Do I know you?” She turned back to the hooded girl.

“M-Me?”

“Yeah. I feel like I’ve seen you before.”

“I-I don’t…!” Her eyes lit up. In fact, she recognized the violet teen herself. “…Er, I don’t think I know you.” She hoped sticking to this lie would veer Miko away.

But the gamer was nonetheless pondering. She looked the girl up and down, trying to recollect her memories. “…!” Then it hit her like a ton of fish. “SAYU?!”

The nearby people looked over at the shout. They stared at Miko confusedly, while the hooded girl had sunk to the ground, trying to curl up like a turtle. “Did she say Sayu?”

“I don’t see a giant mermaid anywhere…”

The girl crawled behind Kazma’s legs, thinking they made good cover. “Wait! You are Sayu, aren’t you? I remember seeing you at the-”

“No I’m not Sayu, just leave me alone!”

“Miko, you’re scaring her.” Carmine said. “Who is Sayu, anyway?”

“She’s like a famous digi-popstar! But why wouldn’t you be… Oh, it was because you were on Floor 1, huh? I know!” Miko aimed her glove.

“Stop, what are you d-” As soon as the girl was flashed, her body began to morph and swell. (Play “Vs. Sayu” from No Straight Roads!)

The surrounding crowd was blown away as a giant, pink mermaid with blue heart eyes, a white dress, and several eye-popping aesthetics exploded into being. “Huh?! Uh?!” Baffled by her sudden gigantification, the girl panicked as all eyes were drawn to her.

“Hey! It’s Sayu!”

“SAYUUUUUU!”

“SAYU! SAYU! SAYU!”

The mermaid stared at her puffy hands and her fish tail. “Whoa! She’s huge!” Kazma gawked.

“Well, ladies and gentlemen,” said the announcer, a microphone alien, “it seems we have a surprise guest appearance! Will Lady Sayu treat us to her hit single? Will her Currents of Love make the tower rise to its peak?!”

“Yaaaaaaaaaayyyy!”

She could barely process what had just happened. A minute ago, she was in her dim, meek, nerdy form, but she had spontaneously changed back into the flashy, adorable mermaid everyone knew and loved. “Sorry to keep you waiting!” she said cheerily. “I’m so happy to see all my wonderful fans again! Pyun! Pyun!”

“Wow, she’s a totally different person.” Carmine said.

Sayu used a large bubble floatie to float onto the stage. Now filled with confidence as deep as the sea, she sang her song.

“Undercurrents,” Tronta jumped some platforms that would pop in from Sayu’s Music Chi, “pull at your heart,” then Vanel helped him zip up and over some notes. “Feeling so powerful, it…” They jumped some drums and slid down a saxophone, “LEADS you on!” They blew out the other end and glitched up, down, and up past some note columns. “The waves of emotion,” they leapt over some note waves, “wash over me,” and ducked down to limbo-slide under a higher wave, “But can you see the ocean…” Tron Wall Jumped some vertical records and into another sax, “through the reef?” then they jumped the heads of some Light Cyclers.

“Undercurrents,” they jumped four platforms, “drag at your heart,” slid and jumped two slanted pianos, “Feeling so powerful, it…” Vanellope zipped through two incoming Cyclers before returning to Tron, “LEADS you on!” followed by sliding up a sloped Song Road. “A new tide comes in and I’m washed away,” the slope dramatically sank as they slid like a waterslide, jumping notes with the rhythm, “Forces stronger than hate are left in the wake.” Vanel zipped up to KO some XANA Hornets while Tron twirled to shoot discs at Cyclers. They regrouped and jumped a stairway of stacked Megatanks.

“More glitches?!” CLU scowled at the XANAbots. “Men, destroy them!”

“Miko, I see Vanellope!” Carmine pointed across the crowd. “They’re being chased!”

“Let’s go help!”

Tron was ascending up a swirling Song Road, watching as the tower rose even higher. There was a coast and small ocean behind the tower, but they couldn’t admire the sights as CLU was chasing them. “Stronger… than hate!” They sliced through some XANA Creepers and jumped off a Krab. “Anchored through the tidal waves!” A wall of notes blocked them, so they Ground Pounded down, then hurriedly repeated the process three times. “Go on… take the bait,” they zipped over a chasm, then ducked some note walls, “You can’t fight the currents of love,” followed by tearing through some Creepers—the next verse immediately started.

“LIFTS you,” they climbed a tall note pole, “from the deep,” then jumped off and into a saxophone, “Rescued when you’re lost at sea,” which exited onto parallel piano slides, having to jump between either with rhythm. “Only surge you’ll ever need,” they arched up and down some song hills while KOing a soldier, “You can’t fight the currents of looooooove…”

A great, swirling Song Slide flew them over the crowd. CLU’s cycle was catching up- “AH!” but he was shot in the back by a fireball.

“Leave them alone!” Jenny yelled, Quill riding on her shoulders. “Can’t you see they’re enjoying a show?!”

CLU growled and threw his Light Disc back, but Jenny kicked it away, sped up, and kicked his head! CLU fell off the Light Cycle and crashed in a clearing of the crowd. “Hey!” He pulled himself up to find a smirking Miko, her fist raised. “Wanna have a go at me, too?!”

“You…” CLU stared in surprise. “You’re-” But found himself having to guard as Miko started throwing punches, singing the faster part of the song.

“ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR,” left fist, right fist, left foot, and right, “Motion on the ocean floor!” followed by rapid punches! “Five, six, seven, eight,” she grabbed CLU’s arms, headbutted, kicked off, then booty-thrusted, “double bubble, swim some more!” She spun on one foot and dealt a roundabout kick. “One, two, three, four, motion on the ocean floor!” She swiftly dodged his shock sticks and kicked him back.

As CLU tried to catch his breath, Quill dropped and rapid-fired. “One, two, three, four, swishing fishes, bring it in!” He rolled out of the way, but Jenny landed. “Five, six, seven, eight,” she dealt those kicks as CLU blocked, “Triple ripple, shake your fins!” then leapt to clamp his head between her skates and grinded them! He pushed her off as, “One, two, three, four,” Eddy cut his back from behind, “Swishing fishes, let’s begin!” CLU blocked his sword with a shock stick and zapped him, allowing CLU to kick Eddy away.

“One, two, three, four,” Kazma dealt a flurry of attacks, “salmon jammin’ everywhere!” then he hopped around to confuse him before tackling the man. “Five, six, seven, eight,” Kazma tried to bite, but CLU dodged his head, “slammin’ clams, I just don’t care!” He flipped Kazma onto his back and bashed both fists. “One, two, three, four,” he jumped back when Miko tried to punch him, “Salmon jammin’ everywhere!” Four bombs fell around him and exploded.

CLU gasped for breath and noticed his HP dwindling. The six operatives had him surrounded. “If you’re a real person, we don’t wanna keep hurting you.” Miko stated. “So, leave our friend alone.”

“Hm hm…” CLU straightened up with hands raised. “The broken Program is your friend, Miko? How bizarre.”

“You… know my name? But who are you?” Miko shone a light over CLU and disabled his avatar.

He changed into a larger, old man in a black robe. “Obi-wan Kenobi?” Jenny questioned.

“My name is Kevin Flynn. I’m a lead developer at Hinobi.”

“Flynn?” Eddy asked. “The same Flynn that made Space Paranoids?”

“Before the company was bought out by Disney. And I can see the MCP has joined with you.”

“Greetings, Producer Flynn.” Boly greeted. “I must apologize for my malfunction in allowing Infinite to corrupt my system.”

“You should. How could you allow something like this to happen?”

“Well, that’s mean.” Miko replied in offense. “It’s your fault for not designing better security.”

Flynn chuckled, changing back into his CLU form. “Yes, you would think that. But this Program is unlike any other in the universe. Seeing her be dismantled so easily is disappointing.”

“I agree that my failure was an illogical outcome.” Boly replied. “The only explanation I can conjecture is that Infinite possessed some sort of-”

“You think we don’t already know that? But even in your incomplete state, you should have been more than capable of defeating him!”

“I’m not sure I like the way you’re talking to her.” Miko said.

“You’ll understand soon enough, Miko.” CLU stared up at Karaoke Tower. Now risen to its peak, the cone-shaped tower had highlighted streaks going up along it. “Fortunately, it seems the tower is satisfied. You’re searching for the Pure Hearts, correct? I have no doubt one is up there.”

“Oh, my goodness!” Sayu squeed. “Who would have thought that I, the humble Sayu, could restore our sweet tower? Seeing it reminds me of a giant ice cream cone, with a sweet, heaping scoop of delicious Sayu~!”

“There you have it, folks!” the announcer said. “It looks like Lady Sayu will have the honor of leading our singers to the top of Karaoke Tower! May their vocals be heard across all Aincrad!”

“Ha ha ha.” CLU smirked. “Why should that oversized popstar have the glory? Let’s make some room for the real star.” He turned and aimed his Light Disc at the mermaid.

“HEY, what’re you doing?!” Carmine shouted, though she wasn’t sensing lethal intent. Regardless, she threw a bomb, but CLU jumped away and fired a large beam directly at Sayu.

“Zzzzzzzzzttttt!” The audience gasped as the mermaid shrank and compressed into her hooded, dorky form. Some looked in the direction of CLU while others kept their gaze up at Sayu, concerned for her health.

“Huh?! Uh…” Sayu looked over her mint-green legs and sleeved arms in panic. She was back to her plain, normal form, but exposed before all her fans. “AaaaaaAAAAHHHH!” Utterly flustered, she rushed backstage.

“That should make her more manageable.” CLU said. “Use her to climb the tower, Miko.”

“Who the hell do you think you are?!” Kazma shouted.

“In this world, I’m CLU. And I will ensure Aincrad is the perfect system!” He materialized his Light Cycle. “Now if you excuse me, I have glitches to derez.” And he zoomed away in a streak of light.

Quill released a sigh. “Well, Tron and Vanellope said to meet backstage. Let’s fill each other in before we make that climb.”

“I wanna check on that Sayu girl, too.” Carmine mentioned.

“Me, too.” Miko agreed. She glared in CLU’s direction one more time. Why did he try to be so ‘friendly’ to her? Just what were they up to…

Chapter Text

I don’t wanna rush into the next Pure Heart, so let’s just progress some side-plots!

Karaoke Backstage

“I saw her dive into that chest.” Tronta said, pointing to a large costume chest.

Miko went to crack the chest open. She saw the sweater of the mint-skinned girl wearing a dragon mask. “Sayu, are you okay?” Miko bent down to pull the mask off. “I’m really sorry that man did that to you.”

“W-Wait!” The girl sat up. “You changed me back into Sayu, didn’t you? Can you do it again?”

“Uh, sure.” Miko aimed her glove and flashed her. The girl swelled on the verge of morphing, but then she popped back into her nerdy form. “Error: this avatar is admin-blocked.” Boly said.

“Admin what?! You mean I can’t change her back?”

“I can’t be Sayu, anymore? Sigh…good night then.” The girl took her mask back and lied in the chest.

“Uh…okay?” The starlit singer, “ShootingStar” replied awkwardly. “Anyway… heya, guys! It’s nice to see other operatives here!”

“You two are operatives?” Quill cocked a brow up at the very tall woman.

“We’re from Sector GF.” The gnome with a pine-tree hat answered. “I’m Dipper, and this is Mabel.”

“Dipper and Mabel?” Carmine repeated. “Wow, I didn’t recognize you at all!”

“I mean, it’s not like we ever talked to you guys~” Mabel chortled.

“I happened to run into them while I was playing.” Tron replied. “I went exploring to find other operatives and luckily found Vanellope, too.”

“Okay, Miko, can you change Tron into his alien form?” Jenny asked. “He just feels weird this way.”

“Fair enough.” Tron shrugged. Miko flashed Tronta and shrunk him to his green-skinned alien form, though his eyes were uncovered by his magenta bangs and he still wore his Tron suit. “So, have you guys run into anyone else?”

Sector Q recapped finding Raleigh, then explained their main quest. “And it seems like a Pure Heart is right at the top of this tower.” Miko recapped. “Now that it’s tall like this, we should be able to climb up now!”

“Yeah!” Dipper nodded. “We were trying to make the tower rise because we thought it could lead us to the boss.”

“Then let’s just start climbing.” Quill decided. “This might be our easiest heart, yet!”

“Miko, I have important information surrounding this topic.” Boly said. “While my data on the boss is scrambled, I can confirm that we will require the aid of the singer who finished the erection of the tower.”

“Ugh, there’s just no good way to use that word.” Miko cringed. “But, are you saying that we need Sayu?”

“Sayu produced a tremendous amount of Music Chi to give the tower its current form.”

“In that case…” Miko went over and calmly opened the chest. “Sayu? Did you hear that?”

Her spectacled eyes peeped up. “Go away.”

“Why are you so shy? You’re famous.”

She rose up a little more. “I’m not famous, Sayu is. I’m just Tila.”

“But you can still sing, can’t you?”

“No!” Her eyes curved in frustration. “I…” She glanced down and away. “I’m not good in front of crowds. Even in school, I freeze up when the teacher calls on me.”

“Tragic backstory of the millennium.” Quill retorted.

Tila shot him a glare and pulled her chest closed. “Ugh!” Miko tried to tug it open. “Stop. Trying. To hide. Sayu!”

“Let me try.” King Kazma stepped over. The large rabbit lifted the chest and turned it upside-down. The contents dumped out, Tila with them. She tried to scramble and crawl away, but Kazma lifted her by the hood. Her head shrank into the hood as he turned her to face him. “Look, I get what you’re going through. Really. You feel more comfortable in your avatar. You feel more special than you do in real life. Just look at me.”

“…?” The girl cutely rose out enough to stare at the rabbit. Miko proceeded to shrink Kazma back into his human form, dropping Tila on her hands. She stared up at the skinny, tan-skinned punk curiously. “See? Not nearly as cool, huh? But even when I’m like this, I’m still tough. I’m not afraid to show people what I can do. Why did you even make Sayu so famous if you were this shy?”

Tila glared and pushed herself to her feet. “I didn’t even make Sayu. She’s from the game Doki Doki Mermaid Club.”

“I have never heard of that.”

“It was a free indie game, but it wasn’t that popular. One day, I wrote a song and decided to sing and post it online. I used artwork of Sayu for the cover because she was the main inspiration. I didn’t think it would be that popular… but before I knew it, I was contacted by her creators. And they…” she smiled and formed a blush, “they really liked it. They liked my singing. They liked… me.”

“And that’s how you met the animators?” Miko asked.

“Yeah. Heh, I was really nervous because I thought they were mature professionals who would be pros at public speaking… but it turns out, they were dorks.”

“Dorks?” Eddy cocked a brow.

“Yep. Just ordinary dorks… like me. And by the time we made Sayu famous, very few knew her true identities.”

“You had a really lovely voice.” Carmine smiled, approaching the taller girl. “You sounded so passionate and joyful!”

“The lyrics were kinda weird.” Eddy shrugged. “It felt like a bunch of aquatic one-liners about love.”

“It was a cute song!” Carmine yelled. “Still, I can understand wanting to keep your identities secret. It would be annoying to have fans always hassling you.”

“It’s not just that.” Tila replied. “I mean, Sayu is cute, iconic, confident, and always positive. If everyone knew what we were really like, they would just be disgusted.”

“You think your friends are disgusting?”

“What?! N-No, no! N-Not most of the time, but, they’re awesome! But we’re not superstars or anything.”

“Alright, alright.” Quill spoke up. “Look, I’m not gonna try to tell you that you should believe in yourself or whatever, but we got a job to do. We have to beat the boss to get-”

“Yeah yeah, the Pure Heart thingy, I… heard that.” Tila meekly turned away, mumbling.

“Then you know how important it is!” Mabel expressed, the bluish-white, starlit girl approaching her. “And he’s right, you should believe in yourself! You’re just as cute as Sayu is!”

“And what about you?” Tila glared. “I highly doubt that’s your real look.”

“This is a rare avatar! I’m a… what am I again?”

“You are a Startouch Elf.” Boly replied. “A very rare race from Planet Xadia. While each player is given a vast collection of options for many races, some NerveGear copies come with rare races. It seems ShootingStar was such a lucky player.”

“That’s what you get for trading me, Dipper!” Mabel teased, much to the chagrin of the impish gnome.

“By the way, what race are you, Tila?” Vanellope asked. “Is that green just from, like, no sunlight?”

“I’m a Zeenuian, you jerk!”

“She’s just kidding.” Miko assured. “But we really do need you, Tila. Surely, you could sing around us?”

Tila bit her lip and looked down. All these strangers depending on her weren’t helping her anxiety. She never should have sang at all and relied on someone else to fight the boss. She wanted to escape this game as much as anyone, but why did she have to get involved? “…Fine. If you want me to fight the boss, we have to do something else first.”

“Like what?”

“Find my friends. They’re the only ones I feel comfortable singing around.”

“Where are they?”

“We split up to explore this floor. They each like different forms of music, so they’re probably checking out those areas. Though if they saw that show, they might actually come here…”

“I guess we’ll have to split up and search for them, too.”

“This task can progress more quickly through use of Quill’s kart.” Boly said.

“My kart?” Quill questioned.

“For defeating the boss of Level 51, Quill has earned the right to summon his kart on any other floor.”

“I CAN?!”

Miko shone her glove on Quill, allowing him to access his screen. He saw and selected his kart, materializing it into being. “YES! More kart levels, baby!” He excitedly hopped in the seat. “Tila, get in the buddy seat. I’ll need you to help find them.”

“Um, is that thing really safe?”

“Yeah, don’t worry!” Miko cheered. “Cool thing about videogame karts is you barely feel the wind tearing off your flesh.”

“We’re gonna need more rides if we’re gonna bring those people back.” Tronta said, materializing a Light Cycle.

“You guys owe me a trip to the racing floor later!” Vanellope cheered, forming a candy kart. (Play “Vs. DJ Subatomic” from NSR!)

Stage 5: Danceopolis, Act 2

The kids drove across a black-tiled road that flashed neon colors under their wheels. The road curved down and sloped back up, afterwards twisting to the left past some booping stereo towers. As the road became straight, stereos rose out and would blow them back with their beats. They drove around the stereos, but Vanellope noticed a stairway of them led to an upper platform. She glitched up those stereos and seized a ?-Block that gifted her three Red Shells. “What’re these for? Not like we’re trying to beat each other.”

“Uh, hey, there are robots following us!” Tila alerted, seeing three Magnum Loaders in pursuit. They were robots with large wheels and red circuits.

Quill and Tron seized their own items, a banana and Green Shell. The racers drifted left up a curved piano road, then right down another one as Tron shot his shell backward. The shell bounced off the corners and destroyed one of the robots. Another Magnum launched a Bob-omb, exploding and stunning Quill and Tron. Vanellope glitched backward and got behind the robots, shooting two shells to destroy them. The group drove into the opening of a giant trumpet, zooming up the interior before the horn launched them across the city. Their gliders helped to carry them as they flew into the window of a piano hall.

Gravity shifted as they began driving along the wall of the vast chamber. There were rows of piano keys along the path, and they would flip up into ramps, prompting them to jump. They drove into a balcony opening and shifted upright, driving on the velvet carpet in a gallery of various pianos. “I’m pretty sure this wouldn’t be on a driving test!” Tila panicked as Quill drove up a fallen seat, onto a piano, and used it to spring up into an upper window. He drove through a secret corridor that rewarded him a key. Curious about what this would open, Quill launched off a Flight Ramp and was soaring toward the steaming pipes of a large organ.

Down below, he saw Tron and Vanel entering from a door to drive across the organ’s keys. Two Magnums were in pursuit, one shooting a shell that was blocked by Tron’s banana, while Vanellope released a Blooper to blot their vision and cause them to drive off. The two crossed the keys and traveled up a gravity path, looping them directly over the pipes. They drove through the steam as the path swerved around and right-side-up, catching up with Quill. He and Tila had parked beside a locked door. “I found this key just now, so I’m curious what’s in here.”

“Sure, we have time for detours.” Vanel shrugged.

Quill unlocked the door, and inside was a small, dusty chamber. The notes of a harpsicord were resounding: there was a Lunarian dressed in black ninja’s attire, but with white puffy balls, and a katana. “Dodo!” Tila exclaimed.

“Huh? Tila!” The Lunarian greeted in surprise. “Check it out! I found the secret harpsicord room! I don’t know why these things went out of style. …Hey, who are these guys?”

“We’ll answer after we find the others.” Tron said. “Get behind me.”

Dodo climbed onto his cycle as they resumed driving. They drove down a swerving stairway and onto the stage of the concert hall. If they had missed the key, they would have to repeat this section and drive up the gravity wall, but now they could drive out the exit door and onto a giant drum! The drum bounced them to another, followed by the cymbals, as a giant drumstick bashed the other end and flung them across the town. They landed on a diagonal ring that circled around a giant disco ball, grabbing some ?-Blocks: Quill got a Mushroom, Tronta three Red Shells, and Vanel a banana. More Magnums materialized and drove ahead of them. The kids performed a tight drift around the disco before launching off a ramp and onto a colorful tile path.

The Magnums dropped bananas and shot shells backward, the kids evading as Tron fired three Red Shells to destroy two robots, while the third one shielded with a banana. Giant music notes were bouncing on the tiled floor and rippling it like waves. The racers could jump off these waves like ramps, but Quill was quick to notice a secret upper path to the left, which the waves could help him jump to. He grabbed a ?-Block that had a Gold Mushroom, relying on Tila to hold onto it. The racers swerved a left turn as Vanel glitched ahead to drop a banana against a Magnum, while Quill returned to the road. The Magnum ahead of him shot a Green Shell, but Quill used his normal Mushroom to boost and force the shell back, destroying the robot.

The racers drove off a ledge and onto a giant record, spinning rapidly and endlessly. They timed it to jump and launch in the direction of another record, and from there launch to a “disco cylinder,” in which gravity shifted so they could drive up and around the vertical device. They drove onto a twisting path at the top and looped onto an upright path. A gigantic stereo was blasting a strong beat to push them back. It was then Quill decided to use the Gold Shroom, boosting against the force and ramming a generator to disable the stereo. Their friends could catch up; if Quill didn’t have that mushroom, they would have to replay this lap.

The racers were driving toward a giant disco prism, an arrow signaling them to drive left and drift around it clockwise. The bright prism made Quill’s kart glow red, Tron’s blue, and Vanel’s green. All three left streaks of light at their back, solid and unfading. When they made the full loop around, a ramp was available to launch them up and onto their own light trails. They made yet another loop, but instead of a ramp, they reached a point where gravity could shift and let them drive up and around the wall. “Duuuuuude, this is so SIIIIIIICK!” Tronta screamed, growing more blind than he was in the real world.

“I think I AM gonna be siiiiiiick!” Dodo screamed.

The colors were incredibly hypnotic as they ascended ever higher, their own colors wrapping up the wall. Finally at the peak, the racers drove down a pillar that led directly into the blinding prism. Their vision split, stretched, and bent into the great prism, but with relief, they landed inside a dim room with a small projector shining a light. “Whoa! How did you guys land in here?” asked a skinny, orange-skinned boy with glasses and a red-and-black patterned shirt.

“Remi!” Tila beamed.

“Guys? What’s going on?”

“Pretty sure we’re being kidnapped.” Dodo answered.

“Now, get on my kart if you know what’s good for ya!” Vanel demanded.

With confusion, Remi boarded her candy kart. The group drove through a passage and off a Flight Ramp. They soared through three giant, silver triangles for small boosts, later landing in an open forest of giant bell trees. A duo of Megatanks gave chase around the bells, trying to expand barriers toward the kids. Tron jumped a ramp to hit a bell, spawning a note wall that caused the Megatanks to crash. Other note walls blocked the way, so they had to ram through green bells to open them, but hitting the red bells would block the path.

At the forest’s end, they would drive up the side of a giant triangle. They collected item blocks, with Tron earning a Peter Gatling, Vanellope a Mushroom, and Quill a Super Horn. They went over the triangle’s peak and down the other side, maneuvering around some electrical barriers. Gravity shifted as they drove on the underside of the triangle. At the end of this side, the path would branch off onto another triangle, the slope going up in their vision, but was actually leading down into the chasm. They went off the edge of that path at a tight angle, driving straight up from the pit. They could return upright at the top of the Right Triangle, seeing the path they had just come from passing underneath as they launched off a ramp to a new path.

They drifted left through a garden of jingle bells, and the jingling rang in their ears as the road became straight. …The jingles nearly masked the siren of a Blue Shell, possibly launched by a robot far behind them. Quill took the lead and tricked the shell into targeting him, only to destroy it with the Super Horn. The group drove onto an icy ground that was encased in a triangle shape, an arrow pointing left. They instinctively tried to drift their karts in that direction, but the ice prevented them from changing direction as they rammed the side of the triangle. They bounced in the intended direction, hit another side, and ricocheted around the triangle several times as it made a cheery, one-note tune.

The ground eventually opened and gravity shifted as they drove into a triangle hole. Three Megatanks pursued them along the sides of the triangle, but Tron used the Peter Gatling to shoot them down. The group shifted to specific sides of the tunnel to avoid electrical beams. The tunnel suddenly shifted horizontally as they zoomed into a small room.

“Zzzzzztt!” A large, chubby human with an umbrella hat, swirly glasses, and yellow shirt was electrified as he tried to play a triangle attached to a cord. “Man, playing the electric triangle is tough. Oh, hey, guys! Cool rides!”

“Hey, Sofa.” Tila greeted. “I won’t begin to question how you found this place.”

“Wait, how’re we gonna carry this guy?” Quill asked.

“Tila, ride on my Light Cycle with Dodo.” Tron instructed. “He can ride on your buddy seat.”

“Ooo, hot dog!” Sofa jumped with joy. After Tila climbed off Quill’s kart, the chubby boy plopped himself on, bouncing Quill up from the force. “Hey, where’s the seatbelt?”

“Game physics are the seatbelt!” Quill abruptly boosted his kart to exit the area, Sofa flinging back briefly before readjusting himself. The kids began to make the drive back to Karaoke Tower. (End song.)

“So, uh, long story short,” Tila began, “we’re going to fight a boss.”

“A boss?!” Remi flinched. “I thought we agreed not to challenge them?”

Tila recapped the events that led to that outcome. “Er, c-can’t we just let the tower sink so someone else can handle it?” Sofa asked, biting his nails in fear.

“I-I know, but this boss has something important. These guys said if they can get it, they’ll be able to fix the game faster. I didn’t mean to make the tower rise, but… now that it is, I have to do something.”

“And she says she only feels comfortable singing around you guys.” Quill explained. “Listen, my teammates will be there to help defend you guys. I’m not sure how this battle’s gonna work, but we need her to sing for us.”

“I dunno, man…” Dodo sighed. “This is way too sudden…”

“Come on, you have a sword!” Vanel noticed.

“For self-defense! Doesn’t mean I’m good at fighting.”

“If it starts to feel too dangerous, you can bail out.” Quill reasoned. “But we really need to beat this boss, so… we have to try.”

“It’s up to you, Tila.” Remi said. “You’re the singer. Are you up for this?”

Tila looked down in mild doubt. The whooshing road wasn’t helping her mind to settle. “…If it’ll really help us leave the game faster, I’ll do it. I mean, the longer we stay in here, the more our bodies will stink after we wake up.”

Sofa gulped. “In that case, I’d rather risk dying to a boss. We’ll stick by you, Tila.”

“Yeah… we’re with you all the way.” Dodo smiled.

“Heh heh…”

“I recognized some of those robots.” Vanellope said. “Those were definitely XANA’s!”

“That evil Program from the Great Clock?” Quill remembered. “I thought we destroyed him along with that Kaiba guy?”

“I guess Eggman snagged a copy of him somehow.” Vanel figured, her bulbous eyes glaring. “Explains how he made a copy of me. Stupid XANA…”

“Kaiba…” Tron repeated the name. “Almost sounds like Kayaba.”

“Ah, go figure.” Quill said. “Either way, I don’t mind destroying him a second time~”

Forest of Wandering

Level 35 was a forest that rested under eternal night. A purple hue covered the quiet woods, with orbs of light decorating the ground. The grass lightly crunched under Kalluto’s steps, keeping a vigilante eye out for the creatures in the darkness. “Nuh! Nyuh!” But behind him, Lexi was stumbling embarrassingly on her own feet. “Okay… focus, and, nyuh, whoa!” She tripped on a light orb.

“Can you be quiet for five minutes?”

“Fine, I’ll take a break from it. I’ll just stick to good old karate!” She smirked, thrusted fists, then a kick forward. “Not to mention I still have my lightningbending to perfect.”

“Yeah, you do that. The boss should be close, so try not to be spooked by any more ghosts.”

“Please, you jumped behind me that one time.”

“Because I was plotting a sneak attack and you were easy bait.” Kalluto walked ahead on that note.

“Pbbbllth!” Lexi raspberried. “Hmm…” Still, she felt like trying the Shave technique a few more times. She closed her eyes and visualized the chi in her body, trying to picture a small burst of it shooting down her leg. “Wait… my lightning.” She opened her hand and willed electricity to spark. “I could just move fast with lightning, like how I did before! Heh, who needs to Shave when I’ve got…” however, she panicked as she realized she was alone in a dark forest. “H-Hey, wait!” (Play “Mirror Magic Mix” from Celeste!)

Stage 6: Forest of Wandering

Mission: Defeat the spooky boss!

Lexi saw Kalluto jump some tree stumps to reach a short ledge, following his example. They crossed the ruins of a roofless house with several broken mattresses. The sheets on those beds sprung to life as ghosts, waving their arms spookily! Kalluto diced two of them up with petals while Lexi punched one in the face, leapt behind, and ripped its sheet, freeing the spirit. Past the house was a dark chasm, where more mattresses were mounted on spiked pillars. They had to bounce these beds to cross, but just one bounce would force the bed through the spike and hurt them should they linger too long. The beds would reset their selves in a moment, so Lexi waited before having her turn.

They landed on a platform as a Rope Ghost spawned in and out above them. They quickly climbed the tangible ghost and leapt to a tree branch platform. Other such ghosts were swinging from branches, so the kids swung them like vines before they disappeared. The duo landed at the edge of a graveyard of tall tombstones. “WHOA!” Lexi leapt when one of the stones tried to fall on her. They were mindful of the other stones, but this graveyard seemed closed off except for an upper passage. They had to stand on a fallen stone and let it fling them up to that path. It merely led to a platform set over a misty abyss. As they contemplated where to go for a moment, a flock of pinkish, smiling, cloudlike ghosts flowed by.

The Gusty Ghosts could be ridden across the abyss, but when Ecto Bubbles flew out of the mist, they quickly jumped to nearby ghosts. They could eventually jump to a platform with a long plank connected to another platform. A tall, sleeping ghost with a scythe guarded the opposite side. Kalluto used quick, quiet Shaves to cross the bridge and pass the ghost. Lexi decided to cross with tiptoes—she nearly slipped and let out a scream. The Sleepy Reapey screamed and lashed its scythe at Lexi, the girl dodging back in a fright. She jumped its downward slash and kicked its face, and when the Reaper stabbed down, it chopped just between her legs, piercing the bridge. Lexi got up and bounced off the hilt, leaping over the Reaper to catch up with Kalluto.

Lexi jumped some pillars that threatened to sink into the mist. She caught up with Kalluto at the edge of a rather foggy, breezy field. “Don’t trust your eyes to lead you.” He cautioned. “Stay with the path or you’ll be whisked away.”

Lexi cocked a brow as he seemed to cross the fog with his eyes closed. She tried to tail after him, but he was soon shrouded behind the mist. “K-Kalluto?” As she wandered through the mist, the eerie breeze picked up, pulling her as though it were a pair of cold hands. “…!” In fact, a windy ghost had taken form behind her, pulling her in its hands. “FFFHH!” In a forceful huff of breath, she tried to shake away, shutting her eyes impulsively. “…” In her closed vision, she could make out the auras of weary ghosts pointing at each other. Lexi fought her way to the “main” path and ran toward each of the ghosts. The breeze couldn’t push her and she was able to- “Oof!” bump into Kalluto.

“Hey, I’m trying to focus.” he stated. They would now have to jump up some platforms, where it seemed Ghost Cannons with melted smiles were popping in and out. They threatened to shoot the kids off into nothing.

“You really shouldn’t run ahead! It’s dangerous to be alone out here.”

“I’m not afraid.” Kalluto proceeded to jump the platforms.

“Well… I am.” With a gulp, Lexi judged the timing of the cannons and jumped up the platforms. She barely landed on the edge of one and poured all the weight to her toes to stable herself. The cannon formed on that platform, but she was just far enough away to avoid being sucked in. She stabilized herself and jumped the rest of the way, soon able to rest on a safe ground. She overlooked a field of Sleepy Reapeys, and the only way across was to jump the tops of tall gravestones. If the thin footholds weren’t bad enough, more Ghost Cannons were spawning in the space between, requiring Lexi to time her jumps. She took her time to get balanced on each gravestone and reached the other side.

Lexi viewed a wall on the other side of the chasm. Atop that wall was a ghost portal, where twin spirits that looked like screaming, elongated faces were stretched out. They spat out copies of their own faces, which Kalluto was already jumping to reach that ledge. Lexi didn’t feel brave enough to bounce those monsters, but she noticed another brick wall to the left. She decided to grip and climb across the bricks. It was a slow and steady process that eventually brought her to her destination. She bypassed the portal, but began crossing a garden with several other portals.

The elongated faces stretched out at her with distant-sounding cries, Lexi ducking and running in total fear. She could just feel them breezing over her ponytail; the very idea of them having substance made her skin crawl. “WHOA!” An air slash flew over her and sliced the heads above: Kalluto’s Tempest Kick. He bent up flower petals to slice other heads and slashed Tempest Kicks to chop the portals, but it could only be done once the heads were whittled through. Lexi donned a half-fearless expression and dealt lightning-powered karate chops to the ghosts. One tried to snake behind Kalluto, but she chopped it, then she jumped to run along its “neck” and reach the top of the portal. She focused her chi and chopped the portal five times before the top portion split open, disabling it. (End song.)

Before she had time to catch her breath, Kalluto was already rushing ahead. She rushed to catch up, but another heavy wind began pushing at her, carrying a storm of autumn leaves. “Kalluto! KALLUTO!” She had to shut her eyes against the bombardment of leaves. The wind howled loudly as she felt herself becoming trapped in its grasp. “Stop it! Let me go! Let me go…” She fell and grasped the ground to prevent herself from blowing away.

She squinted her eyes open and could make out a pair of Japanese sandals walking toward her, accompanied by a black robe that flapped heavily in the breeze. She craned her head up to see Kalluto’s narrowed gaze. “It’s just wind. Don’t they have this on your planet?”

Lexi scrambled up and hugged onto his arm. “Come on, Kalluto, I don’t wanna be left alone.”

“This level is hardly more terrifying than the flower field. If this game is too dangerous for you, you should just stay in a town. I can take care of myself.”

“I…I still don’t think you should be alone either. You might not admit it, but you’re scared, too.”

“The only thing I’m ‘scared’ of is my real body lying helpless in my room. My older brothers can be real dick bags.”

“Yeesh, and I thought Miko had a potty-mouth. But hey, I’m scared of that, too! That’s why we gotta stick together.”

Kalluto didn’t understand this girl. Not only was she clingy, she was too trusting and naïve. She was obviously raised under starkly different customs and didn’t know a day of suffering. Even her karate was something she seemed to only do for fun. No one was pressuring her to master it. In a way, she reminded him of his older sister, except Alluka acted even more clueless. At least Lexi had the potential and desire to improve herself. He wouldn’t admit that he was curious how far she could go… though as she continued to hug his arm like this, he felt some kind of nervous reaction in his chest. Whatever it was, it was probably from discomfort.

“You can let go of my arm now.” Lexi did so. “But fine… I’ll try not to run ahead too much. You’d better have enough allowance to pay me.”

“Yeah, yeah…”

The duo began to cross a graveyard, seeing a tall hill with a lone, dead tree. That tree had a single noose hanging from it. There was nothing to disturb them but the howling wind as they trekked to the top of the hill. There was nothing beyond the hill, so this noose was no doubt the end. It was twice the height of the kids. “Hmm…Lexi, let me stand on you.”

“W-Wait, you’re not about to…”

“This must have to do with the clue we found earlier. ‘Let your body hang to be with the great Nooseus.’ Just help me up and I’ll use my Iron Body.”

“Okay…” With concern, Lexi allowed Kalluto onto her shoulders. He put the noose around his neck and activated Iron Body. Feeling strained by the weight, Lexi backed out, and Kalluto’s weight was able to tear the noose from the branch.

A humongous noose descended from the clouds as the “Here Comes Trouble” music broke the silence. The noose had cyan spiritual flames around it and a big pair of cartoony, tired eyes. The noose stared down at its tiny visitors and spoke in a deep echo. “Why, hello there. That’s a mighty strong neck on your shoulders, little girl.”

“I’m a boy! And you must be the ‘great Nooseus.’”

“Indeed. I haven’t seen a good, solid neck in ages. Tell me, approximately how often do you twist your head in a single day?”

“Why would we keep track of THAT, you weirdo?!” Lexi shouted.

“With every turn of the cheek, the muscles of your neck grow slightly stronger. I can see that your necks are still budding, but they’ll still make fine additions to my collection.”

“Well, you don’t get to have them! We’re proud of our necks and we want them to grow nice and long!”

“And hopefully, the rest of our bodies grow, too.” Kalluto said.

“But I can make them nice and long, too. Necks are as elastic as rubber once you stretch them right. Step a little closer and experience my strong, but gentle touch.”

“I’ll show you a gentle touch!” (Play “Toilet of Doom” from Hat in Time!)

Boss fight: Nooseus

The noose rose to the sky and dropped down around the graveyard, springing mattresses out of the graves. Sheet Spooks woke up and charged at them spookily. The kids zipped around and ripped the sheets apart, and the freed spirits would become Rope Ghosts leading up above the Hanging Tree. Nooseus attempted to smash down against them, so Lexi ran up to the tree while dodging his noose. Once under the tree, she tricked him into dropping, but upon trying to rise, his loop was stuck against the tree! Kalluto swung the Rope Ghosts to reach a weak point on his rope, easily slicing it with a Tempest Kick. The noose cried out a tired, “Ahhhh,” but he ordered the Rope Ghosts to link up and reattach him to the rest of the rope.

Nooseus grabbed the Hanging Tree and tore it off the ground, tossing it away so it couldn’t be used again. He began trying to drop against the kids again, generating ghostly shockwaves each time. Kalluto allowed himself to be roped, using Iron Body just as the noose snagged his neck. The elongated loop struggled to lift the iron boy off the ground, so Lexi hurriedly climbed his rope. She had to step on one of his sleepy eyes, which were following her direction. She climbed past the ghostly part of rope and found another weak point in the main rope. Using electric-powered karate chops, she whittled through the weak knitting and severed that portion. His grip on Kalluto waned as the boy escaped. “I would rank your neck a B+.” Nooseus said as more ghosts filled in his gap.

He went to hang on the other side of the field as a bunch of smaller, ghostly nooses lowered from the sky. Ghost Cannons began to flicker in and out around the field, all aimed at a noose. Kalluto lifted Lexi and Shaved his way through the field, dodging all the cannons until they were close to Nooseus. A cannon was swapping between one of the ghost nooses and Nooseus himself, so Kalluto timed it to shoot himself toward the boss. He couldn’t manifest an Iron Body quick enough during his flight, and his neck was seized and strangled. Lexi hurriedly timed the cannon to be fired onto the boss herself. While he was busy with Kalluto, Lexi climbed the rope and reached the third weak point. She zapped and chopped another portion of rope, finally making Nooseus drop to the ground.

Kalluto escaped and jumped to catch Lexi as she fell. The fallen noose helped himself up and started to whirl his detached rope against them. Kalluto caught the rope and hoisted Nooseus into the air, looking for something to rope him onto. There was a particularly tall gravestone that was perfect for the task, as it was designed like a long neck with a small head. Kalluto tossed him around the stone like a lasso. He tugged forcefully to bind Nooseus tightly against the stone, leaving Lexi to run up to him. She began dealing quick Zap Chops around Nooseus’ loop, steadily causing his knitting to peel off. Kalluto began turning to further tug against the thick rope, and his forceful pull ripped the noose’s knitting even further.

As the noose finally split, Nooseus spoke his last words: “That was a euphoric experience. I only regret to never feel a squeeze like that again…” His soul ascended to the heavens and popped into a fantastic firework. The Boss Key burst from the explosion and bounced on the ground. (End song.)

Lexi picked the key up with pride and stashed it in her inventory. “Way to go, partner!” she raised a hand.

“A job well done indeed.”

“Heeeey.” She glared and emphasized the hand.

Kalluto reached up and shook the hand, Lexi rolling her eyes. “It’s time to make the journey back.”

However, a Gusty Ghost drifted by them. It seemed that a flock of the peaceful spirits had come to congratulate them. “It looks like we have a way back.” Lexi smiled. “Let’s hitch a ride!” She eagerly jumped on a passing Gusty.

Kalluto jogged after and jumped on the ghost. It levitated in the air and peacefully soared over the ghostly valley. The very level they had just endured passed beneath their vision, giving them a sense of accomplishment. “You know, that was pretty fun.” Lexi lied down on the ghost to enjoy the breeze. “I feel like we’re really making progress. We’re getting just a little bit closer to saving everyone.”

“I can only hope other bosses have already fallen. I will admit that you have been a bit more useful than I anticipated.”

“Aww, you’re more useful than I anticipated, too.” Lexi said snidely. “Now that I think about it, are you in the KND?”

“No.”

“I feel like you would be pretty good at it. You’re so strong!”

“The KND just isn’t for me.”

“Yeah… my sister goes on some pretty dangerous missions.” Lexi looked away. “But we’re kind of on a dangerous mission ourself. It’s scary, but it doesn’t feel as scary as I thought it’d be.”

“When you learn to cast fear aside, you find that things are much less troublesome than you make them out to be.”

“I guess so… Wanna get something to eat? We could use an HP boost.”

“I suppose. This virtual money has to be good for something.”

Bank in Tokyo, six years ago

It was an ordinary autumn day. Young Shino accompanied her mother to the local bank. The 10-year-old wore a cute, light-yellow buttoned sweater, red shorts, and pink shoes with tall stockings. She wasn’t a girl who liked to socialize and was quiet and patient most of the time.

Standing in line with her mom, she boredly glanced around at other customers. One particular man looked rather scary and thuggish. “…?!” But, to her utmost horror, the man slowly withdrew something from his pocket: a gun. And in only a second later,

“ALRIGHT, LISTEN UP!” The customers were stunned silent with fear. “Gimme all the money you have or else!”

As the robber aimed his gun at the desk lady, she stuttered, “P-Please don’t! I’m pregnant!”

“Shino, get behind me…” her mother whispered.

“HEY!” He turned the gun on her. “Don’t think of trying anything!”

“I-I just…”

Shino’s eyes creased as the robber threatened her. She heard about bank robberies on TV, but never expected it to happen in real life. She was terrified, feeling her mother could die at any moment. “AAAAH!” On pure impulse, Shino jumped and tugged his arm down.

“SHINO!”

“Let GO, you little brat!” The man forcefully swung Shino off and against the underside of the desk. However, he lost his grip on the gun, the weapon landing to Shino’s left. Her head throbbing, she focused on the weapon for a second, before looking fearfully at the looming criminal.

“Come on, kid, give it back.” he said as his trembling hand closed in.

Shino scrambled to grab the weapon, but just as the hand flew at her, she let out a cry, thrusted her clenched hands up, shut her eyes, and pulled the trigger.

“ACK-…” The man was shot clear in the chest. Some of the blood splashed on Shino as he fell back and died. The customers stared speechless at the child, dumbfounded by the result, but none more than Shino herself. A man was dead before her… He was dead from the gun in her hands… This gun with the black star, its trigger pulled by her finger… Shino killed a person…

“Murderer…Murderer…Murderer…” The rumors were quick to spread around school. The children either feared her or mocked her. Regardless of the context or reason, Shino was a cold-blooded person who killed a fellow human.

Gun Gale, currently

Sinon lay curled on the inn bed, her human legs chilly. But being under the covers would make her too hot. She didn’t want to pay to fall asleep, because were she to end up in a nightmare, she couldn’t wake herself up. She thought she was strong in this world… that she could escape her fear, master it… but it was only a game.

She gasped, hearing a knock at her door, sitting upright. “Hey. It’s Nagisa. Are you in there?”

She hugged her knees and clenched her mouth shut in anger. The door cracked open as Nagisa peeped in. “Uh, hey.” He awkwardly walked in. “I… wanted to apologize for Killua. That was pretty rude of him. …Fie wanted to lend you these.” He carried in a pair of green boots and set them by the wall. “She said she doesn’t mind.”

“You can keep them.” She said defeatedly, bowing her head. “I’m just gonna stay in here.”

“Well, I thought I would ask if you’d like to come with us. We’re about to go hunt the boss.”

“I don’t want to come.”

“Okay. It is pretty dangerous, so I won’t pressure you.”

She grit her teeth and faced him. “Why are you acting so calm? Someone died. You could die!”

“But if we don’t destroy that thing, more people could die.”

Sinon looked down again and hugged her knees tighter. “Then you shouldn’t bring someone like me.”

Nagisa looked at her with sympathy. He really wanted to comfort her, but he couldn’t without understanding the problem. And it felt wrong to just ask her. “…Why did you play this game?”

“I…I…I don’t know. Maybe I was trying to accept what happened. Trying to accept that… people die.”

“Were they important to you?”

“N-No… it was a robber. He… threatened my mom and…”

Nagisa raised a brow lightly. “…Is your mom okay?”

“She…she wasn’t hurt…”

“That’s good. My mom was hurt recently. She’s in a coma.”

Sinon’s eyes lit as she looked at him. “I’m sorry…”

“I don’t even know who did it. I wasn’t able to help her.” Nagisa bowed his head in shame.

“…” Was he trying to imply something? Was he…

“Eh, sorry.” Nagisa blushed. “This is getting too personal. I’ll see you later, Sinon.” He left the room.

Sinon glared at the space in front of her. Assuming that was true… was Nagisa saying that he would kill whoever attacked his mom? But why? Killing people was wrong. Even if someone were threatening you, they would’ve been arrested by the police. …But what if the police didn’t come before an innocent person died? What if he killed more people? What if he already killed more people? What if he didn’t care if others lived? Even so, no one deserves to die… what if, deep down, he cherished his life? What if he had others to care about? What if he was killing for the sake of someone else… the same way that Sinon…

“…I wonder… what’s so important to Infinite… that he lets all these people die.”

As she pondered this, Sinon looked out the inn window. Nagisa had rejoined his friends, and Killua had to give Fie a piggyback ride. “Why did you lend her your shoes if you had sensitive feet?!” he yelled.

“I’ll feel more comfortable once we get to the desert. For now, I don’t wanna step on any shrapnel.”

“So, I guess Sinon doesn’t wanna come?” Millium asked.

“At the moment, no.” Nagisa answered. “I think she needs time to think.”

“How about I stay here in case she changes her mind?” Goombella asked. “I still know the way, so I’ll help her catch up with you guys.”

“Okay! But call us if something happens. For now, let’s go get that Reaper!”

Sinon watched as the team began their journey to the desert, while the Goomba stayed behind. “They’re KND operatives… how often do they see death? Are they used to it? Do they… have to resort to killing their selves sometimes?” Was their everyday life no different from this game?

Chapter Text

Fun fact about Sayu’s band: their names are based off the Solfege scales, do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do! Anyway, I did have a song battle in mind with this boss, but I don’t wanna write lyrics right now, so just the boss theme. XD

The operatives brought Tila’s band to the base of Karaoke Tower. A neon Song Road spiraled up around the perimeter of the cone-shaped structure. There were also glowing holes along it. “You know, why does Karaoke Tower look more like a giant horn?” Eddy wondered.

“Maybe it’s a microphone, but they didn’t design the speaker part.” Miko shrugged. “It would be hard to stay balanced on a round bottom, right?”

“Whoa!” Remi tried to walk up the path, but immediately felt his foot slip down. “This road’s as slippery as ice.”

“The Song Road will only respond to the voice of the one who fully awoke the tower.” Boly replied. “That person can otherwise bring allies to be carried up the tower. Your musicbending will also be imperative in combatting the boss. I would suggest allowing Miko to accompany you.”

“Only I can collect the Pure Hearts, for some reason.”

“Correct, but your guitar-playing skills will be vital as well.”

“But I don’t have a guitar.”

As a response, Boly digitized a purple electric guitar from her glove. “YEAH!” She strummed it with vigor. “I feel the power of my high scores coursing through me!”

Tila bit her lip nervously and stared up the imposing tower. Even with her teammates beside her, this was more important than any show. These guys were depending on her to beat this boss. Heck, probably everyone in Aincrad was depending on her. This was way different from singing in their comfy, safe recording room. “So, uh, are we ready to go?” Dodo asked.

“I don’t know…” Tila replied.

“It’ll be fine, Tila.” Miko assured, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Just pretend it’s an ordinary concert. Just imagine yourself on a stage and sing like you always have!”

“A st-st-stage?”

“Uh, I mean, your bedroom! Wherever you actually sing… The point is, just do what you always have. We’ll back you up every step of the way.”

“I’m ready to show that boss who’s boss!” Sofa declared, drawing out an umbrella missile launcher.

“Okay…” Tila closed her eyes and took a breath. She courageously walked to the start of the path. Her friends and Miko lined up behind her as the latter strummed her guitar.

Miko played the opening rhythm of “Currents of Love” with Tila applying vocals. As they soared up the neon road, jets of music burst out of holes, prompting the players to either jump or duck. The “pop” and “bum bum” parts of the music would indicate when to do so. The world outside the tower spiraled around them like a giant merry-go-round, whether it be the city of Danceopolis or the sea and coast bordering the tower. “At least we get a cool view.” Dodo smiled as they ducked a jet.

“My eyes are spinning…” Sofa’s swirly lenses literally spun.

“And the heart is just up above!” Miko beamed, seeing the yellow glow shimmering above the peak.

“It doesn’t seem like there’s much room for a boss fight.” Remi commented, the group jumping two jets. “Are you sure that it’s actually-”

A giant tentacle suddenly slapped around part of the tower, blocking their ascent. The music coming to a halt, they abruptly slid down, but were able to grab some of the holes and stop. The tentacle was a light-cyan and seemed to originate from the nearby sea.

With the “Here Comes Trouble” music came a tremendous entity rising from the sea. It was an enormous squid, with a string of wavy black hair on his forehead, and a long nose hanging over his wry smile. His eyes were half-closed in a condescending fashion. His voice was snide and taunting. “Wow, did you kids dig this clarinet up just for me? Niiiice joooob~ I guess I’ll give you a photo of my solid gold mansion in return~”

“A clarinet?!” Eddy gasped. “So, that’s why it looked like a horn!”

“And we don’t want a gold mansion!” Miko yelled. “We want a gold heart and giant gold key!”

“Sorry, kiddies~ Those belong to the gifted people. You’re better off sticking to your toy xylophone or air guitar~”

“My air guitar can rock way more than your clarinet! And don’t get me started on my digi-guitar!”

“Eh hyur hyur hyur. I’ll just have to swat you gnats off myself. Too bad I didn’t bring my solid gold fly-swatter~”

“Gang, let’s just kick his solid gold booty!”

“I know the perfect song for this!” Sofa said. “Miko, do you know the song ‘Krak Attack’?”

“Yeah! Want me to play it?”

“The mood doesn’t feel right, anymore!” Tila yelled.

“Just leave the hard part to us!” Remi insisted.

“You can do it, Tila!” Miko declared, fingers ready. “Let’s crack him!” (Play “Trev the Tenteyecle” from Yooka-Laylee!)

Boss fight: Squimillion

Tila began to sing a song about tentacles tearing up a ship. Miko played to the necessary rhythm as they slid back up the Song Road, jumping or ducking musical jets from the holes. Every few notes built up a large note, and once they had three built up, they were launched at the first tentacle. Squimillion pulled the appendage away with a flinch, the band continuing up the tower to begin the next notes. After knocking away the second tentacle, Squimillion began to wrap one of them along the path and after them. Dodo jumped to the back and used his katana to slice it away, making sure to jump the note jets. Miko and Tila took down the third tentacle before the group stopped in front of one of the clarinet’s giant holes. They could stand on a stage as Squimillion swiped his tentacles across it. Dodo sliced the right tentacles while Remi shot the left ones with a laser rifle. The boss’s attacks stuck with the rhythm, as did the girls’ notes, which were sent back into the clarinet’s hole.

Squimillion sported a big smile as his hanging nose bent up. “Hyur hyur hyur! Hyuuuurrr!” His snotty laugh sent bad notes from his nose like a horn. But once the clarinet built up enough Music Chi, it unleashed a powerful, colorful beam, obliterating the bad notes and blasting Squimillion in the nose. He reeled back from the agonizing sensation as his eyes showed dizziness. His eyes cast a slight glare, his nose shooting more notes as the kids slid up the tower. For the second act, the individual players would have to jump the incoming notes, letting them burst against the wall. Miko and Tila otherwise kept up their performance and took down the first tentacle.

While the process repeated, a tentacle quickly slid up after them, so Dodo readied to cut it, but the appendage backed out tauntingly. Dodo jumped some obstacles and readied to cut again, but it backed out again. He grew frustrated having to focus on it while jumping hazards—the tentacle abruptly sped up, but Dodo managed to slice it in time. The blockade tentacle was taken down as well. For this next portion, Squimillion slid tentacles in zigzaggy fashions from above. Remi was left to shoot the tips of them and force them to withdraw. “If this were an actual game, how would the player manage all five of us?” he asked. “This would be like the worst rhythm level.”

The group rested on another stage beside the second hole. Squimillion shot bad notes that spiraled en route to them, but Sofa’s umbrella missiles would spiral in the same fashion and intercept them. The tentacles tried to slither and sneak up on the stage instead of swiping across, but Dodo and Remi were once again vigilante in taking them down. An aggravated Squimillion brought up four tentacles in the desire to smash them, but the girls had finished charging the Song Beam in time. It fired forth and struck the boss’s big nose, prompting him into bringing his tentacles back in defense. His eyelids curved in fury as they glided up the next portion of the tower.

Squimillion began to quickly slap his tentacles to the tower with the beat of drums. Some of his slaps were away from them, but they would have to jump the ones that would hit. It was very difficult to predict—“AAAH!” and Remi was inevitably smashed. When the tentacle pulled away, it sucked Remi off and dropped him off the tower. “REMI!” Tila screamed.

“WHOA!” The group slid down when the rhythm broke.

“I got him!” Jenny saw the event and skated under Remi.

“Tila, he’s fine! Keep singing!” Miko yelled.

Tila swallowed and hurriedly got back into the rhythm, sounding a tad more nervous, but the road allowed them to travel up once more. They took down a blockade tentacle, and bad notes came flying as Sofa shot them down. Dodo would chop the tentacles that either slid up the path or down from above. The girls took down the next blockade tentacle—but it suddenly smacked the wall under Dodo, causing the Lunarian to lose balance and fall. Tila looked down in worry, keeping her rhythm up, but saw Jenny about to catch him next. Fortunately, as the clarinet was getting thinner, the road was shorter, so they reached the next hole.

The angry Squimillion rose each tentacle high and brought them down synchronically. Sofa was the only one left to defend the girls, aiming his umbrella at each of the closest ones, to shoot them away. Squimillion cycled through the six tentacles once more, but also applied bad notes as well. Sofa ended up suffering some damage in trying to shoot them all, mainly prioritizing the tentacles while allowing the notes to hit himself. Eventually, the hole was powered up enough to fire a Song Beam and blast the giant squid again.

“Huff…huff…I’m out of ammo.” Sofa sighed. “And I’m exhausted… can I lay and rest for a minute?” He plopped back on the stage.

“B-B-But, Sofa…” Tila stuttered.

“C’mon, Ti!” Miko grabbed her sleeve. “We’re almost there!”

“I-I-I can’t! W-W-W-What if I mess up, w-w-what if I need to improvise, w-what’s my choreography-”

“Hey!” Miko grabbed her shoulders and looked her dead in the eye. “No one is judging you! Right now, you’re in your bedroom, freestyling in comfort! It’s just you and your four goofy friends who like hearing you sing!”

“F-Four?”

“Uh, I mean, if you wanna consider us friends, too?” She grinned awkwardly.

Tila lightly chuckled and blushed. This violet-haired girl was no less geeky than herself deep down. Tila jumped back on the Song Road and Miko followed. The tower grew thinner and thinner as they jumped the last series of note streams. Finally, they reached the reed of the clarinet, the Pure Heart suspended several feet above them. “D’oh, I’ve had enough! Give me my clarinet!” Squimillion performed a miraculously leap to the sky and was dead set on planting his mouth to the reed.

Miko grit her teeth and impaled her guitar into the reed. As Tila mustered up the final notes, the entire tower rose from the ground and flipped upside-down. Their amplified notes blew from the massive horn and swallowed Squimillion in a vortex of music. He swirled and flushed down the horn, his entire mushy mass being squished up the tower. The horn flipped again and stamped back in the ground. The girls watched as a tiny, normal-size squid popped out of the reed and plopped. His droopy little eyes gazed up at the musicians in sadness.

“Don’t look at me like that… I’m just a cashier! Waaaaaahhhh!”

Miko was about to step on him, but… “Nah, you can have the honors!”

“M-Me?”

“Yeah! It’s your victory.”

Tila cracked a smile. She hesitantly raised her foot and squished the squid. His body burst into fireworks as the Boss Key bounced out. (End song.)

Tila sighed and collected the key. It shrank into her inventory. “We won… heh…we won…”

“You sure did.” Miko smiled, looking up at the yellow heart. “Hey, catch that for me.” She opened her hands as Tila stepped on. She was flung up to the heart. (Play “Resort Cassette” from Celeste!)

As soon as she touched it, the heart flashed and flew across Danceopolis, forming another series of blue and purple platforms. Tila happily slid the Song Road all the way down the tower while Miko began the course to the heart. Miko had to run across a trail of alternating note platforms, the colors rapidly swapping with each step. She jumped to another trail, then reached two parallel pillars of these notes. She had to Wall Jump them in rapid succession, afterwards landing at the top of a slide. The speed of her sliding was equal to that of the alternating segments, until she had to jump off at the end. She landed in a blue Barrel Cannon, but fired herself before it could disappear, and landed in a purple cannon. Their rhythm was slightly longer than the notes, but Miko still had to shoot quickly.

Spikes would hover in front of the cannons, either matching the color of the current or preceding cannon. If Miko fired too early or too late, the spikes would pierce her. Once across the cannon segment, Miko quick-hopped up a stairway of changing notes and seized the Pure Heart. A flash and shockwave wiped out the evil glitches on this floor. With the jingle of an 8-bit victory theme, the yellow heart absorbed into Miko’s chest. (End song.)

Miko returned to the ground just in time for her team to catch up. Clap, clap, clap, clap. They turned around to find CLU, clapping with a smug smile. “Bravo, Me_K.O.. Your victory was all but assured. Though with your exceptional skill in gaming, why rely on these lesser users?”

“What the hell is your problem?” Miko glared. “Why are you so obsessed over me?”

“Yeah.” Quill said, feeling equally suspicious. “Is it because Miko is carrying Boly? Why did Boly happen to pick her, anyway?”

“Just keep finding those hearts. The sooner the system is restored, the sooner we can dispose of Infinite.”

“How did Infinite even take over the system, anyway?” Jenny asked. “Is your security that lax?”

“Jenny, don’t hurt Boly’s feelings!” Carmine shouted.

“I-I was talking about those guys!”

“After looking Infinite over,” CLU answered, “we’ve determined the source of his power: Infinite possesses a DNEgg.”

“A DNEgg?”

“A relic belonging to the God of DNA, Deoxys. It contains powerful chi that can significantly enhance that of a matterbender.”

“They mentioned he was a matterbender…” Eddy thought aloud. “Wait, what does matterbending have to do with taking over a game?”

“Because matter is no different from data.” CLU smirked. “While each of the elements is managed by its own god, all physical things in the universe possess a molecular formula. Deoxys was a pivotal god in the creation of everything, a holy computer that the gods used to establish the coding, structure, and overall data of all physical matter. That same data was used to establish the DNA of all creatures, dividing us between race and physiology. He is no different from the computers we use to code games, to code THIS very game! By harvesting Deoxys’ DNEgg, Infinite gained the power to bend this game’s data.”

“Assuming any of that makes any sense,” Quill began, “how is restoring Boly supposed to help us beat that kind of power?”

“Because once it is complete, Boly’s power will surpass his.”

Quill narrowed his eyes, still ascertained as to Boly’s true identity. But there was more this man wasn’t telling them.

“Hey, I want you to let Tila turn back into Sayu!” Miko demanded.

“Hmph. What a disappointing follow-up.” CLU frowned. “In spite of your talent, your brain is the one aspect that hasn’t developed. Very well. Here is her data.” He fired a beam from his disc, which Miko absorbed into her glove. The executive mounted his Light Cycle. “It’s said that matter cannot be created nor destroyed, only transformed. But this universe had to come from something. Videogames did not exist until the data to develop them was created. But with enough effort, it can become something more than data. Just look at Mira.”

“Mira?”

“Until next time, Me_K.O..” CLU sped away on his cycle, leaving the group suspicious and angry.

As CLU rode to the Elevator Tower, his scoffed to himself. “‘Perhaps the true secret is heart. Perhaps Miko needs to grow stronger with her friends.’ However did you arrive at that philosophy, Kayaba?”

His form changed into that of Flynn. “They say that love and friendship are the strongest forces. Perhaps Kayaba wanted to implement that into the programming.”

He changed back into CLU. “But simple feelings can’t equate to one’s strength or intellect. And it’s not like Miko is an emotionbender!”

He became Flynn. “The strength of a soul is the strength of one’s feelings. Perhaps embracing these feelings is the secret to perfection.”

Then back to CLU. “Those feelings can just as easily be a detriment. You know as well as I do those brats won’t agree to our plan. But so long as they keep the goal of defeating Infinite in mind, it can proceed nonetheless.”

Back to Flynn. “I suppose that villain’s interference does work in our favor. But if we don’t eliminate him fully and completely, our own program could backfire on us.”

CLU agreed with him, “Indeed. Let’s ensure that Miko can rid Aincrad of this menace!”

…

Sector Q regrouped with the other operatives, plus Sayu’s band. Miko transferred Sayu’s data into Tila. “You are now able to change between your true form and Sayu at will.” Boly said.

“Heh, thank you.” Tila smiled. “Having the option is nice. I wouldn’t want fans to flock after me all the time.”

“Wait, how come I always have to rely on Miko to change?” Kazma asked.

“My new amount of Pure Hearts have restored some of my functions, so other users will have this ability.”

“Ah, terrific!”

“I have to admit, fighting that boss was pretty epic.” Remi grinned dorkily. “Almost as cool as actual games. More nerve-wrecking though…”

“What’re you guys gonna do now?” Miko asked.

“I sort of just wanna lay low after that.” Tila said. “But it was great to help you, Miko. I hope we can meet in the real world someday.”

“It’s a promise!”

“Hey, can we go back to the Bell Forest?” Sofa asked. “I gotta show you guys these cool triangles I found!”

“Uh, sure, man.” Dodo replied reluctantly. “Take care, ops.”

“See ya!” The operatives waved as the band returned to exploring the city.

“Well, at least we have a large group now!” Dipper perked up; the others only just remembered the little gnome was there.

“Yeah, but I feel like we’re a little too large.” Quill spoke honestly. “Maybe we should send you after one of the other hearts.”

“Sure!” Tron agreed. “Where should we go?”

“You can go to Level 70!” Miko said. “Some friends of ours are up there, but we haven’t heard from them in a while. You think you can go check up on them?”

“What’s on that floor?”

“Floor 70 is the Battlestar Belt.” Boly answered. “It is designed like outer space and tests players’ space combat skills.”

“Sounds like the perfect place for this Shooting Star!” Mabel declared. “Let’s go!”

“Good luck, gang!” Vanellope cheered as the four left.

“…Hey, where are they going?” Eddy asked.

“Huh? Did you just zone out big time?” Jenny remarked.

“N-No, I was getting some coffee. I assumed we wouldn’t be moving for a bit, so…”

“Eddy, what time is it where you are?” Carmine asked.

“About 10:30 p.m..”

“Maybe you should get some sleep.”

“Why? You guys technically don’t have to sleep. Besides, I’m great at staying up late for games, and this game is kinda important.”

“But if you force yourself to stay awake, you won’t be able to keep up. You must be exhausted after these past few levels.”

“But if I go to sleep, you’ll just rest at an inn or something. We can’t just stop while we’re making good progress.”

“Then why don’t we just keep going while you get some rest?” Quill suggested.

“Well, you’re quick to suggest that. Weren’t you the one who wanted to wait for me to come?”

“This mission is important and I want to finish as soon as possible, but I don’t want you to tire yourself. Just shrink your character’s dimensions so we can carry you. Once you’re well rested, you can rejoin us.”

“Ah, that’s what you wanted.” Eddy smirked. “Alright then… a good gamer needs beauty sleep once in a while.”

He edited his character’s coding for a minute, the group watching as it glitched down to a toy size. “There! Now you have a Pocket Eddy to give you good luck.”

“Hehe!” Carmine giggled, gently picking him up. “Make sure you get a good night’s sleep, Pocket Eddy.” She tucked him neatly in her overall pocket.

“Hahaha!” Miko happily poked the little guy’s tummy. “I need to get my own Eddy plushie when we get out of here!”

“Good thing I can’t actually feel that!” Eddy taunted. “But I’ll make sure to message everyone on what Flynn told us. It could even be useful.”

“We do need to fix our HP.” Kazma reminded. “Let’s at least find some food on the next floor.”

“There are still Pure Hearts to be searched for on Levels 23 and 62.” Boly affirmed.

“What are on those floors?” asked Carmine.

“Level 23 is Gun Gale, popular for gun users. Level 62 is Cutie Park, a large amusement park.”

“Oh, that one sounds lovely! Can we go there next? Though I’d hate for Eddy to miss it.”

“We can take him to a real carnival later.” Quill assured. “Let’s hit the elevator!”

Battlestar Belt

The Sector Hinobi operatives zoomed across space in black and white, Arwing-like ships with the white “H” logo. Zahra tricked some enemy ships into tailing her as her engine released a wave of pink fire. The fire whittled down their HP and destroyed the ships. Mitch Williams, fitting for his gold skin, was shooting gold-colored lasers from his ship, sniping down 10 ships ahead of him. “Gang, watch out!” Five yelled through the intercoms. “The Grim Wreaker’s charging another super beam!”

The Grim Wreaker was a large, black ship with green windows. A huge turret was attached to the bottom of the ship, charging a green laser. The Hinobi agents scattered before the beam’s wide radius could reach them. Mitch then turned toward the turret and landed some shots off it, but as soon as the laser powered down, the ship teleported. “This guy is so broken!” Five yelled.

“Ah ha ha ha!” laughed the pilot of the Wreaker, a green-skinned man with a long chin and purple cape. “This heart makes a perfect power source! My ship is invincible!”

“Your HP bar says differently, Hacker!” Mitch retorted.

“That’s THE Hacker to you, boy! And a mere loss of HP is nothing when I-”

A round, purple ship with a black bubble window suddenly crashed against the laser cannon. It planted a bomb before flying away. The laser was destroyed in a great explosion. “What?!” Hacker screamed- “THAT’S THE HACKER!” The new ship performed a somersault and shot lasers at the windows, and Hacker warped the ship before it could try to ram through. “Bah! It seems some repairs are in order. You haven’t seen the last of me!” The Grim Wreaker turned to fly away.

“Who is that?” Bergy asked as the ship flew toward a large, flat asteroid.

“Maybe it’s Miko!” Five said hopefully. “Let’s follow them.”

The asteroid had some garages on it for ship repairs. Sector Hinobi landed just as the purple ship’s window opened. It seemed that an Irken lady stepped out, her purple antennas bent over her face like teeth. Her eyes were shut tight and she had a skull design on her black dress. “Couldn’t you newbs do better than that?”

“Oh, no…” Mitch glared at the woman. “It’s YOU again.”

“I can’t believe you actually got this game.” Five stated. “House arrest should’ve had some limits.”

“Yeah, well Hinobi wanted all the good gamers to play this because they knew it would rake in the sales. But now we’re trapped in here, so I guess I’m being punished either way. By the way, you know that guy isn’t the boss, right?”

“He isn’t? But he had the Pure Heart.”

“What’s that?”

“It’s something that’ll help us fix the game. There’s eight of them, so it would be a lot faster than beating 100 bosses.”

“What makes you think that?”

“They’re a part of the MCP. So, we fix that, we fix the game and… stuff.”

“Meh…not buyin’ it.” The woman rested back in her seat.

“Hey, I think you owe it to us to help!” Mitch shouted. “If you’re really sorry about what happened to Haneesh, then you ought to help us stop Infinite before any more players die!”

“I get that, but the thing is… I don’t really trust it. How did Infinite program it so that all the NerveGear would explode or whatever once the players died? Assuming Infinite is an outside party who hacked them, it still makes me think that Hinobi already had that program set up.”

“Why would Hinobi do that?” Bergy asked with a hint of ridiculousness. “They were dead set on making sure this game was absolutely glitchless!”

“It’s not like they would tell you kids anything they’re plotting.”

“Yeah, and just what ARE they plotting?” Zahra questioned suspiciously.

“Who knows? Either way, you can never trust these big corporation types. That’s partly why I sided with Mandy. At least pirates like her are honest about what they do. Not that their crewmen have any sense of honor… Anyway, have fun finding your hearts. I doubt they’ll do what you expect them to though.” She started up her ship for takeoff.

“And just what do YOU plan to do?” Mitch yelled.

“Keep playing until the big reveal, I guess. But I’ll be sure to help out any newbs along the way.” The windshield closed, and she took off on that note.

“Heh…if Kazma wants to see a real pro gamer, look no further than her.”

“But that couldn’t be true, right?” Five asked. “I mean, I wouldn’t know the first thing about how to code or hack this game, but…”

Mitch looked away in thought. Hearing her say that sort of made him think of something else… He remembered that, back when Miko joined their sector, they had been getting frequent visits from Inspector 7. And now, Miko was carrying the MCP on her glove. It happened to choose her out of anyone else, when it should’ve at least been under Kayaba’s protection. Even when they witnessed Miko collect that Pure Heart, it went into her body like… “Mitch?” Bergy spoke.

“Ugh…let’s just get after that heart. Who needs that woman, anyway…”

Code Room

Infinite gasped for breath as he channeled data into his red egg. A screen displayed Dr. Eggman’s visage. “It seems you were in a bit of a fight, Infinite.”

“I was attacked by a strange boy. He was defying my bending! There’s no doubt! It was definitely…!”

“I see… It seems the heads of this game still have a bit of control. But what of these ‘Pure Hearts’? Or the MCP?”

“According to XANA, a particular group is actively searching for them: Sector Q. And one girl, Miko, seems to carry the MCP’s conscience on her glove!”

“Sector Q… Miko… how did this group get assigned to the mission? No matter. I will have them dealt with myself! But, in other news, I think I’ve determined just what it is Hinobi is trying to do.”

“What is it?”

“Oh ho ho ho! There’s been a rather curious anomaly here in Galaxia! I don’t really have proof of a connection… but I am starting to be reminded of something. An ancient story… about the planet Mira.”

KND Moonbase

Cheren fixed himself a cup of coffee as he looked over the intel that Eddy passed around. “So, they used a relic from Deoxys to hack the game? Deoxys…” He glanced at his desktop computer. “And something about Mira? Isn’t that a planet in…yaaaaaaawn. Maybe I should get some—WHOA!” he yelled to the ringing of the alarm.

Cheren rushed out to the Global Tactical Station and answered a call from Nebula. “Cheren, I’m glad you’re still up. Is everything alright down there?”

“I-I think. I haven’t been reported of any deaths… God, I’m just really stressed out. I should be used to three big missions happening at the same time, but like…sigh, never mind. Did you wanna tell me something?”

“I wanted to show you this weird anomaly we picked up in Galaxia. Well, it’s technically a few lightyears away from Galaxia, but…” Nebula brought up an image of space.

Cheren squinted and could make out the dark-blue, faded shape of a planet. “What… is that?”

“I guess it’s some sort of… holographic planet. Some operatives went to investigate it, but I guess it disappears when you get too close.”

“Is it… as big as a real planet?”

“We’re… not sure. …Heh, I guess you already have enough to think about. I felt like I needed to show you, but I’m not sure if it has anything to do with these cases.”

“Alright, well… now that you’re here, I wanna tell you something that Sector Q sent.”

…

…

Somewhere in space, segments of the holographic planet were flickering. It was situated in an area that wouldn’t interfere with intergalactic commerce. Even if people would notice it, they wouldn’t notice the comparatively small fortress suspended in the “air” above one portion of the planet.

Chapter Text

I decided to give Level 62 a more fitting name, so slight edit for the previous chapter. For now, play “Approaching the Ruins” from Ori and the Will of Wisps!

Sector SA’s group ventured to the desert on the outskirts of Gun Gale. It wasn’t frigid under the night sky, just a muggy kind of hot, though they could see the embers amongst the giant bones of Dead Man Valley. “It’s not as pretty as Secco.” Morgiana said, burying her toes in the sand. “But I do feel right at home here.”

“I’ve never been to a desert,” Fie said as she brushed her own feet along the sand, “but it doesn’t feel much different than a battlefield on a summer night.”

“Between Fie and I, both our races are faster at night.” Killua said. “And since Nagisa is trained in the ways of the Sheikah, he can apply that boost, too.”

“Lucky you!” Millium shouted, squinting her eyes in the blowing sand. “I can barely see anything. Carry me, Nagisa.” She climbed on his shoulders without asking.

“Well, Fie, ready to show these boys who the real night masters are?” Morg asked with a smirk.

“You bet.” Fie shared a knuckle bump with her.

“Aww, our girls are getting along.” Nagisa grinned.

“They’re gonna team up against us, you know.”

“Then it’s another incentive to get stronger!” Killua rolled his eyes at him.

Stage 7: Dead Man Valley

Mission: Search for and eliminate Death Gun!

The team crossed a narrow pathway over a chasm. Green birds called Hrok flapped overhead and barfed boulders down. Fie used Morg as a spring to jump up and slice two of their necks, while Killua roped one’s neck with his yo-yo, tugged down, and slammed it against the side of the path. The path led into a trench where they had to jump giant bones jutting out of the wall. They leapt the bones in a ninja style, but one of them was bent up against the cliff. Morgiana bellowed a soundwave to shake the bone and make it fall and hang, allowing them to jump it. Afterwards, they had to jump the tops of some bones standing from the abyss, but they threatened to lean and fall, so the group followed each other quickly.

They could rest on a stable path and follow it out of the trench. A giant worm emerged from an open area of sand, its mouth opening to a minigun. The team scattered as it let fire, confusing the beast. It had to stop to reload its bullets, so Nagisa rushed up and allowed Millium to shoot ink into its mouth. As it coughed and gagged on the ink, Fie and Killua combined their Tempest Kicks to slice the worm and derez it. The following area was covered in black ink. By squirting it with blue ink, Millium was able to patch up a pathway, but each blue puddle would only last a few seconds. She and Nagisa led the way as she squirted a path across the blackness. “Bad time to be barefoot, huh, girls?” Killua smirked. Morg groaned in anger.

The group could rest on a platform, but sadly found that Millium was low on ink. “That’s a shame. If I was still an Inkling, I could…” Millium squirted some ink on the platform and sunk in. “Hey, I can still swim in ink!” She was able to refill her pistols and proceeded to squirt out the next trail. Smaller Gunworms rose from the ink to squirt them, but by shooting them, Millium could make them explode into larger puddles of blue ink. They could rest on another safe platform and would have to jump other, ascending platforms. “Watch out!” Killua yelled as a black cannonball dropped on a platform. It was actually a black inkball, bouncing once before bursting and drenching the platform. They rushed up the other platforms as other inkballs bounced on them. The group jumped to a thin ledge along a cliffside, having to sidle along. The cannon responsible for the inkballs tried to shoot them, so the assassins sent Tempests to intercept and pop the balls.

They could escape onto a pathway leading past the cliffside, and toward a tall hill of flowing sand. The teens had to jump giant skulls flowing down the sand, but as soon as one were stepped on, it would turn over and reveal an inky underside. They had to jump quickly while otherwise taking separate routes. There was a safe strip of land to stand on as they viewed up the next segment: all the skulls were covered in black ink, so Millium had to quickly shoot them with blue ink and make them safe to bounce up. They reached the top of the sand hill and caught their breath after the tricky segment (along with Millium’s ink).

They walked around a cliff wall, but held back once they spotted an enemy camp. There was a short, yellow-robed figure patrolling outside with a rifle, his glowing mechanical eyes skimming around. Fie checked that no other guards were around, rushed up on swift, silent feet, and lopped its head off. Fie crawled up some stairs to the camp, glancing left down a path to see two more Spy Guns standing guard, facing opposite ways. She took one of her daggers and tossed it straight into the head of the robot facing her direction. She then raced up and sliced the head off the one behind. Killua snuck up to join her, the two peaking around the next corner to see Spy Guns patrolling the camp, with a lookout situated on a tower. The two ducked their way behind the tents, killing robots whenever they could. Killua eventually made it to the lookout tower, climbed up, and killed that robot.

After steadily killing all the Spy Guns, the other operatives could catch up. They crept around another wall and viewed a wide bridge with more guards. When a gust of sand swept across the bridge with the wind, it blocked the robots’ vision, so Fie and Kill ran to climb under the bridge. Once on the other side, the two climbed up and silently slaughtered all the robots starting from the back. The bridge led to a large wooden gate that Morg could easily thrust open with a strong kick. (Play “Bubble Blowing Baby Hunt” from Spongebob Movie!)

The inside of the building was a rough and tough bar with bullet holes in the dart boards and broken tables. As soon as the mechanical bargoers heard the door burst in, they turned toward the rude, underaged intruders. One hoisted up a ball-and-chain and lashed it at them. Morgiana rolled underneath and kicked her leg up to catch the weapon around her leg, then spin and kick the robot away. Nagisa jumped in front of her and used Iron Body to defend her from bullets. Killua leapt over them and swung his ink-loaded yo-yos at the robots. Millium sent her own trail of ink, swam along, and jumped out to shoot more of them down.

Once all the mechs were dealt with, the group approached a ledge over an oily pit. A big rotating dartboard was on the other side, with a nearby bucket of darts to throw. Killua simply had to toss them at the spots labeled 1, 2, 3, 4, etc., and once complete, a staircase opened to the second floor. “I actually know what that dartboard was trying to reference, but it’ll take a while to explain.”

“Good for you.” Morg replied. They proceeded up the stairs and entered a passage with a bridge leading over an oily river. The bridge was in a slight curve with a Muscle Gun situated at the end, manning a minigun. Nagisa and Fie dashed up together, using nimble evasion to dodge the minigun. Once they reached him, Fie sliced both the minigun and the robot’s head. The next room required them to jump some platforms sliding along the wall, waterwheels, then some treadmills, while another Muscle Gun would try to shoot them. The group hid behind a metal barrier. Millium shot ink onto a platform sliding on the left wall, then jumped to hide in the ink, staying safe from the robot’s bullets. When it stopped to reload, she jumped the waterwheels and reached another moving platform, squirting some ink to hide from another bullet flurry.

She then jumped to a treadmill and ran up it before the gun could finish reloading. She squirted ink onto a wall under the next treadmill and could hide in it for a moment. She then ran across the next treadmill and reached the Muscle Gun, shooting him until he splatted. The others were able to catch up, but the passage only seemed to lead to a vent. “Looks like we have to crawl!” Millium cheered as she pulled open the vent and crawled in first. The others lined up and followed.

“Euh, somebody stinks in here.” Killua cringed. “When was the last time you guys bathed?”

“We didn’t know that our bodily odors would transmit to this game.” Morg remarked.

“Hmm hmm hmm hmm hmm hmmmmmm~” Fie hummed an innocent little tune.

The vent let out on a platform overlooking a large bar room. “ON YOUR MARKS… AIM… FIRE!” The bargoers were divided in two squadrons, using the tables as shields as they let fire. The sounds flooded the air and would make their voices inaudible. The operatives would have to jump and swing ceiling fans, only going one at a time to keep them from breaking off. Bullets were fired upward between some fans, forcing the group to wait a bit. There was an explosion that seemed to send tables toward the ceiling, and they seemed to stay airborne long enough for them to jump across. “Physiiiiiics!” Millium cheered.

The tables led to another platform at the base of some thin, grated stairs. The stairs led toward an opening near the middle of the ceiling. Bullets were fired up and through the grates. Morg got atop Killua and Millium atop Fie, while the three assassins used Iron Body to prevent their soles from being punctured. The bullets possessed the pattern of starting from the top of the stairs and shooting along downward. The group stepped upward during the lulls in the bullets until they were eventually able to make it into the ceiling. (Play “Here Comes Trouble” from Banjo!)

They had entered a dark room with neon lights, a cracked mirror, and the faint ray of window light. The operatives froze in surprise and slight terror: Death Gun himself was slouching on a couch. Faced away from them, he had his arm around a glowing green heart. “Then Ah shot the little ho in the leg, and she was like, ‘What dis black stuff on mah leg? Whut? Now it’s on mah head. Oh dang, Ah’m dead!’ Shoulda seen the look on her face, baby, she done knew she effed up!”

“Is…is that really Death Gun?” Morg asked.

“He sounds like… a totally different person.” Fie whispered. “Like some gangster who’s just having a good time.”

Morgiana grit her teeth. How dare he recollect Constanze’s death in such a manner. With a stomp that shook the room, she yelled, “HEY!”

“YO!” Death Gun jumped out of his seat and faced them. “HUH?! You the little twerps from the Turf War! Come to take another crack at me?”

“You… How could you talk like that after killing our friend?! Don’t you understand? Constanze is dead in the real world!”

“All Ah know is, big boss man ordered me to kill,” he pointed upward, “so Ah kill. Ah dunno if it’s in mah program or whatever, but Ah love killin’. And Ah dig the Reaper shtick, too. Bein’ a big bad harbinger of death is livin’ the dream!”

“We have something in common.” Nagisa admitted with a glare. “I like pretending to be an assassin. There’s a weird little thrill with pretending to kill people. But you know something? Killing someone for real is a much different feeling. It shouldn’t feel good. It should leave a scar in your heart. Even if you don’t think you have a choice… there’s no way you can just laugh it off.”

“And whaddyou know? You don’t got a speck of that feeling in yo’ eyes, son.”

“Even if I did decide to kill… I would save that bloodlust for someone far more deserving. I wouldn’t do it for some sick laugh. You killed an innocent girl who just wanted to get back home to her friends. A heartless Program like you deserves your punishment.”

“Heh! I got your heart right here!” He took the Pure Heart and tucked it under his cloak. “We’ll see who’s heartless after my black ink melts yours!” (Play “King Bulblin” from Zelda: Twilight Princess!)

Boss fight: Death Gun

The Reaper vanished, and they could see the glow of his red eyes appear in the corner. The group ducked behind the couch as jets of black ink were fired. Nagisa ran out and used Shaves to dodge his ink and distract him. This allowed Morg to run out from the other side, leap, and slam a kick to his metal head. She dealt a flurry of kicks as his voice grunts recorded as, “Dwoh, dwoh, dwoh, d’oh…” in a monotone fashion. They saw that a fair chunk of his HP bar depleted, and Morg didn’t feel as big a strain as before.

“So, you really are weaker in your own boss room!” she smirked. Death Gun warped to the couch and kicked it away to expose the other operatives. They tried to attack him, but he leapt away and shot at Killua, who dodged and bashed his head with a yo-yo. Fie charged to stab him, but Death Gun warped over to the window, blocking its light as he unloaded a flurry of ink all over the room. As Millium and Killua tried to cover it with blue ink—“DWOH!” a bullet seemed to shatter the window and hit Death Gun’s head. The red-eyed Reaper turned with a glare.

There was a distant cliff nearly shrouded by the sandy wind… but it was just clear enough for a sniper to take aim. “Hey! It looks like they caught up after all!” Nagisa beamed, the group seizing the chance to dice the Reaper.

Sinon had one boot planted to the ground as her rifle locked dead on the window. “Did you get him, Sinon?” Goombella asked.

“Yeah! He didn’t go down, but he lost a ton of health. I’ll wait for another chance to-”

“S-S-SINON!”

With a start, she turned, horrified as the Reaper loomed over her. Goombella used psychic to pull her out of the way before Death Gun shot. “Benjamin, get your ass over here!” He jumped away and landed on the back of his horse. Benjamin whinnied and galloped away from the girls, rapidly firing. Goombella was able to catch some ink bullets in psychic, but only a few managed to hit the horseback rider when she tossed them back. Death Gun warped behind them and charged, but Goombella thrusted herself up to headbutt the neck of the horse, causing it to reel up and knock Death off. The horse galloped away in panic. “Yeah, screw you, Benjamin!” Death Gun vanished again, and the girls worriedly searched around.

“Sinon, check back in the boss room!” Goombella ushered. She did so and viewed through her scope. She could see the other operatives scrambling to dodge attacks again.

Death Gun was now camouflaged, blending excellently into the dark. He spammed his teleport function along with this and tried to shoot them from various corners. He would instantly warp whenever one of them came. Millium remembered the partly-cracked mirror in the room. She was able to convey a plan to her team, so Killua offered to grab and move the mirror toward the window while the others distracted Death. They could reflect the faint window light onto Death Gun and partially reveal his silhouette. He still kept up his routine, but thanks to the mirror, Sinon was able to pinpoint his location. She fired, and the bullet ricocheted off the mirror and struck the boss.

Killua ran up and electrified Death Gun, but he eventually broke free and teleported. The group couldn’t sense his presence in the room, so they gathered at the window and signaled Sinon. “He returned back here!” Sinon gasped. “But where?!”

Distant galloping was heard, originating from beneath the ledge opposite of them. Sinon hurried over and viewed down the bumpy hillside they had used to get here. Death Gun was riding up on his horse, and his path was rather erratic up the complex hill. His red glare drew ever closer in Sinon’s magnified vision, filling her with panic. Her finger trembled on the trigger, her mind too frightened to focus a clear shot. But as Death Gun was seconds from range, she nearly felt her heart stop.

Goombella pulled her out of the way before the ink could fire. Death Gun galloped around them and shot rounds of ink as Goombella helped herself and Sinon avoid. By the time he warped, Sinon began to clutch her heart and gasp heavily. Death Gun appeared at the top of a nearby mound, switching to using a sniper rifle. Goombella shielded them in a psychic barrier and used the Friend Code to dial them. “Guys, Sinon’s having a panic attack!”

“Morgiana, throw me over there!” Nagisa ordered. “I’ll help them!”

“Okay!” Morg lifted her boyfriend, spun around, and hurled him out the window.

He grabbed the edge of the cliff and pulled himself up, taking cover behind Goombella’s barrier. “Sinon, calm down! We need you to focus!”

“H-H-He…he could’ve killed me… I almost died… almost…died…”

“We’re here for you! Just breathe and calm down.”

“Huff…hah…huff…hah…” Sinon tried to ease her heart, but the sounds of gunfire and epic boss music didn’t help. She had to calm down… and shoot Death Gun… or else, they would die…

“AH!” Goombella screamed when the barrier finally gave way. Nagisa pulled them both aside and helped them dodge further shots.

“Sinon, can you get a good shot if I carry you?”

Sinon took a gulp and tried to swallow her fear. “Yeah… just keep me steady.” Nagisa hoisted her legs up, she rested an elbow on his shoulder and the rifle on his head. She focused upward, but Nagisa’s dodging made her aim zip around, dizzying her. Nagisa stabled himself in one general position as Sinon took the shot, wounding Death Gun’s shoulder. He seemed to retreat. “Phew… you know, for a boy, you’re really skinny.”

“I could easily make a rude comeback~” Nagisa teased, letting her down. “Now, where did-”

An ink jut fired from over the building, the group barely dodging. “He’s further away!” Goombella yelled. “Let’s climb on that ledge!” She used psychic to lift the two up onto the mound where Death Gun was stationed. They ducked behind some weak stalagmites that would be shattered by the boss’s shots. They maneuvered partway around the bar until Sinon could more clearly make out Death Gun’s eyes. She waited for him to fire once more before taking aim herself. With a pull of the trigger, she punctured his right eye. That chunk of his mechanical head was ripped off, exposing the sparkling wires within, while his left eye shone with a more vengeful glare.

He disappeared again, but the whinny of the horse was heard far behind them. There was a rather long bridge that faded into the dark, but the tiny glow of Death Gun’s eye was visible beyond it. Sinon planted her foot back down and aimed. The boss was rapidly warping between left, right, and middle, intending to confuse her. Sinon glanced left and saw Nagisa crawl behind a stalagmite near the bridge, grinning at her as his fingers positioned to snap. Sinon waited for his signal, and though she felt nervous as Death Gun drew closer, she maintained composure, ready to shoot whenever and wherever. Death Gun had finally crossed the bridge’s threshold—

The snap of Nagisa’s fingers mimicked the blast of a gun, prompting Death’s horse into jumping left. Sinon angled her rifle that way and fired. The moment of deception served as her bullet pierced the Reaper’s chest. (End song.)

“DWOH!” He dropped his gun and gripped his chest, wobbling unstably. “No… Who are you?!”

Sinon propped the rifle upward and answered firmly. “I’m the Phantom Bullet.”

“That’s… a much cooler name. You are the real deal…heh…” he gave a thumbs-up. “Grrr…” then a middle finger. “Dwoh…” He made a Cross gesture over his chest, shortly before falling back and plummeting down the cliff. His body exploded, and a giant golden key flew up and bounced on the ledge.

“Haaaaah…” Sinon released a sigh and relaxed on the ground.

“Good job, Sinon…” Nagisa reached down to her with a smile. Sinon smiled back and took his hand. As she stood, a green heart had risen from the abyss as well. “I guess these are our rewards. Maybe the key is the game’s MacGuffin while that’s a Heart Container to give us more health.”

“Probably…”

“Well, I think you’ve earned both. Go on and take them!”

“Heh heh…” Sinon walked up and grabbed the Boss Key, which shrank into her inventory. She reached for the heart and pulled it into her arms. “Hmm…I can’t put this one in inventory.”

“Oh. I wonder what it does then? Might as well keep it with us. Let’s meet back with the others.”

The operatives made their way out of the bar and regrouped with Goombella, Nagisa, and Sinon on the bridge. “Hopefully now, they’ll be able to play their Turf Wars in peace.” Fie said. “Sigh…now there’s just 99 more bosses to kill.”

“We need to see if there’s a way to check if other bosses were killed.” Goombella suggested.

“Um…can I ask you guys something?”

“Yeah, Sinon?”

The sniper clenched her lips tight and had eyes hanging down in guilt. “If I…If I had shot Infinite… do you think I could’ve saved everyone?”

The group shared looks of sympathy. Most were unsure how to answer, but Nagisa replied with, “I’m not sure if he would’ve gone down that easy. Maybe it’s good that we got away from him when we did. Though we’re still not sure why that Chadley kid was able to hurt him…”

Sinon was mildly surprised by his straightforward answer. She decided to ask another question on her mind. “As KND operatives… do you always have to make hard decisions like that?”

“To be honest… our general code is not to kill anybody. But sometimes, we don’t have a choice. We’ve never really killed ourselves, but we’re worried if we’ll have to make that decision someday. When we do… we’ll just have to accept the guilt and try to understand our own reasoning. Maybe we did it to protect someone, maybe the enemy was just too strong… who knows?”

Sinon sighed. “I try to tell myself that sometimes… that it was just an accident, or I thought Mom was gonna die… or I was gonna die… but I wasn’t just ashamed of what I did… I was afraid. My own classmates started to fear me. I thought someone would try to kill me out of fear… and that’s why I play these games. To kill that fear. But even if I log out of this game, that fear is just gonna come back. I don’t want to feel that way, anymore.”

“I’m so sorry…” Goombella said, unsure what to really say.

“But you guys…you witnessed someone die… and chose to confront the killer. You probably deal with this sort of stuff every day. You’re much stronger than I am.”

“You confronted him, too.” Morg said. “You are strong.”

“I want to be stronger. I…I…” Sinon stood up straight and faced them with resolved eyes. “Can I… join your sector?”

This question had them taken aback. “Y…You want to be an operative?” Nagisa asked.

“I felt something… when I was fighting that boss. I felt braver than I’ve ever felt with these games. I want to learn how to really stand strong. So, if it’s alright… I’d like to join you.”

“Are you sure you want our sector?”

“What do you mean?”

“What if I told you that we’re a pretty infamous team? That we had something super powerful or important that a lot of villains are trying to hunt us? That’s why that Infinite guy attacked us in fact.”

Sinon processed this for a moment. She wasn’t sure if he was being rhetorical… but if he was serious, it would be biting off more than she expected a few seconds ago. “…I’ll take a chance.” She decided. “I feel comfortable around you guys. Well, maybe except him.”

“Okay, I’m sorry I said that!” Killua said.

“I can beat him up for you if you want.” Morg cracked her knuckles. “He could use a bit more discipline.”

Sinon cracked a giggle. “Even so… it would be hard to get to know a whole different sector, anyway. I want to give it a try.”

“Then we’ll be happy to have you.” Nagisa smiled, approaching her with a raised hand. “Sinon… welcome to Sector SA!” As she slapped it, the hands grasped each other to signify the bond of friendship. The words Sinon joined the party! flashed above!

The team made their way out of Dead Man Valley and rode separate dune buggies to cross the desert. “Morg, where did you learn how to drive?” Goombella noticed the Fanalis driving the other buggy.

“I seem to be a natural at it.”

“Hey, guys! Check it out!” Millium called attention to her U.I. screen.

“What is it, Mill?” Fie asked.

“I can access my options again! Didn’t Infinite make it so we couldn’t do that?”

“Wait, can we log out?”

“No… but I can change back into an Inkling!” She clicked the button and shrank back into her Inkling form. “Woomy!”

“Oh, cool! Maybe we can, too.” Nagisa brought up his screen. “Sweet! I can become a Sheikah again!” In a moment, his clothes transformed into a Sheikah suit with the red eye symbol on the shirt, his eyes red, ears pointed, and hair white. “Sweet! It gets tiring being a human every day, you know?”

“So, I can change back, too!” Goombella brought up her U.I. and transformed: she became a more round, vanilla, ghost-like creature with a wiggly antenna. She had big, pale-red eyes with her hint of vibrance.

“What the heck is that?” Killua asked.

“I was lucky enough to have a rare race in my settings! I’m a Luff, an ancient culture from Mushroom World.”

“Pretty awesome!” Fie said. “As for me, I’m just a wolf.” She turned into a Mobian wolf.

“And I’m a silver hedgehog!” Killua turned shorter and changed as well. “I think Mobius has a silver hedgehog king, right?”

“Yeah, the Sol Kingdom.” Goombella answered.

“I didn’t really choose a race myself.” Morgiana said. “But I can turn back into my new clothes.”

“Didn’t feel like getting creative?” Killua cocked a brow.

“I’m proud of my birth race, so I had no reason to change.”

“These avatars aren’t because we aren’t proud of our race, it’s just fun to be something different. It’s like dressing up for Halloween. Also, you realize that since Infinite recognizes and is trying to hunt us, it’s good to have disguises?”

“You have me there, I suppose. Still, if you can change back into your avatars, it would seem like Infinite’s control is weakening.”

They parked their buggies at a garage at the edge of town. Morgiana changed her white clothes into a fiery top and skirt with a red lion’s head around her own, her face visible through the mouth. “At the very least, this should serve as a nice disguise.”

“Disguise?! You freakin’ stand out with that parade outfit!” Killua yelled.

“Hey, my girlfriend is a feisty Red Lion and I love her.”

“Thank you, Nagisa~”

“Ugh, cringe.” Sinon scoffed.

“Hey, you asked to join. Get used to our dynamic.”

“Are you gonna change back, Sinon?” Goombella asked.

“Hmm… to be honest, my avatar is somewhat famous. Maybe I should stick to my plain form.”

“Okay. If I can be honest myself, I think you’re much cuter in your normal look. You got a kind of vibe that says, ‘I may look cute and approachable, but I know how to stand my ground if you push me.’”

Sinon blushed and giggled. “Well, I am carrying a rifle on my back. …Hmm…” She frowned and held her arm meekly.

“It’s okay.” Nagisa said comfortingly. “Once you’ve warmed up to us, you can talk more about it. Maybe that will help.”

“Thanks, but… how could I even use this skill when I join for real?”

“We have non-lethal bullets. Or you could get another ink gun! Enemies can’t fight if their clothes are messy.”

“Heh heh…” She cracked a smile.

They began to make their way through town. It seemed that news was already spreading of Death Gun’s defeat, so people were steadily calming down. Furthermore, Infinite didn’t seem to be present, anymore, so they hurried to the Elevator Tower quickly and discreetly. “You know, should I give you guys my real name and address, if I’m gonna be joining?”

“It’s bad to give your personal info online.” Killua remarked.

“The real name should be fine.” Goombella said.

“It’s Shino. Shino Asada.”

“Sounds like Shiota Nagisa!” he smiled.

“Hah, almost.”

“Whoa, check it out!” a Gungan man called near a bulletin board. “The boss of this floor got defeated!”

“It must’ve been that guy again!” a Gerudo woman pointed.

Sector SA approached the board. It seemed to list all 100 floors, in which golden dots were lit next to some. “Whoa! Over ten floors’ worth of bosses were defeated!” Goombella exclaimed.

“Dang right, kids!” the Gungan replied jovially. “Just look! Apparently, that guy’s been wiping them all out.”

The nearby screen depicted a grinning, energetic boy with spiky brown hair, blue eyes, puffy black pants that went up into a matching shirt, and red edges on his black jacket. He proudly crossed a Boss Key with another large key of his own, gold with crown-shaped teeth and a silver hilt. “This kid’s been the MVP of Aincrad! He took out seven bosses so far! Top that with the ones that already fell, we’ll be out of this game in no time!”

“People of Aincrad! Leave everything to me!” the boy declared. “I am Sora, knight of the Kingdom of Disney! I’ll defeat the evil Infinite and save everyone! So, please, stay out of harm’s way and leave fighting the bosses to me!”

“Sora…” Nagisa recognized the boy. “He was… in New Galaxia. And he was there when Index fought Hoopa!”

“He’s also a character in Disney’s Kingdom Hearts series.” Goombella reminded. “No way that’s the same Sora! He’s probably a character that Disney asked Hinobi to add.”

“It looks like Disney is trying to prove their innocence in this matter by helping to resolve it.” Morg deduced. “It’s good, but… I have to wonder if they’re doing this for our sakes or for theirs.”

“That’s how corporations are.” Killua agreed. “But the more bosses that go down, the better. Where should we search next?”

“You can search right behind you~” a loudish, bubbly voice said.

The group turned with a gasp. Behind them was… a rather tall and rotund lady with puffy cheeks, Arabian attire that consisted of white pants, brown curled shoes, and a black top with gold edges. Her belly was pink and round like a large piece of gum. “Whoa! It’s a Majin!” Goombella exclaimed.

“A clever disguise, wouldn’t you say? No one’s sure to recognize me now~”

“Haha! Index!” Nagisa laughed. “Wait, if you’ve entered the game, then who’s…”

“Not to worry! This avatar is actually being controlled via a computer. Carol learned how to do this and passed the info around to other computer users. Of course, I couldn’t work a computer for the life of me, so I’ve asked Xedni to help me.”

“What up, guys?” She spoke again in a slightly lower tone. “Xedni here.”

In the real world, Index and Xedni were on the couch together, sharing sandwiches. “Been a while since we got to meet up. You wouldn’t believe everything we’ve been through.”

“Our story’s been pretty crazy, too.” Index said. “But we don’t have time to catch up.”

“How did you even recognize us?” asked Nagisa.

“I recognized Nagisa’s Sheikah clothes and Morgiana’s legs. But we already knew you were here because of this level’s news. We saw what happened…”

“To Constanze?”

“So, it was Constanze. I thought she looked familiar. That means she’s probably dead in the real world.”

“Do you wanna call and ask them about that?” Xedni asked. “I can fill them in.”

“I think I will. Thanks, Xedni.” Index stood and left for the terminal.

“Anyway, we’ve been keeping in touch with other sectors. You guys should try to find Sector Q. Sector Q has…”

Disney Castle

“Hoho! This game is pretty easy!” Mickey laughed. His NerveGear was attached to a high tech computer as he used a controller to control Sora. “It was nice of Barbara to tell me the locations of the bosses. I don’t know what force is behind Infinite, but I’m not about to let him make Disney look bad. …Or hurt anybody else-hoho! But with Data Sora here, maybe people will start to like Re:coded a lot better. …Nah, it’s still a pretty pointless game. I still haven’t heard of any KND operatives in here, but they’re around somewhere. And if we’re still following the pattern… there might just be another Firstborn around the corner.”

Elevator Tower

Sector Q boarded an empty elevator and enjoyed a relaxing ride upward. They watched a few floors go by before Carmine stared down at the tiny Eddy in her pouch. “Haha! Eddy, you look like a baby kangaroo!”

“He’s probably asleep by now.” Quill said.

“I’m still gonna pretend!” Carmine lifted Eddy to suspend him by the arms over the rim of her pouch. “Hop! Hop! Hop! Hop!” She began to gleefully bounce like a kangaroo. Miko and Jenny giggled at her joyful demeanor.

“Man, why are you so cheerful?” Kazma asked, sitting back against the wall with his legs stretched out.

Carmine happened to hop in his direction and- “Whoa!” tripped on his legs and fell on her belly. “Oh no!” Feeling Eddy’s weight beneath her, she quickly pushed up and off. “Uh-oh… I squished out some of his HP.”

“Uh…my bad.” Kazma blushed.

“We better make sure to feed him when we get up there.” Quill said. “But at least he wouldn’t die for real, anyway.”

“Eddy, I’m so sorry! I’ll buy you all the food you want!” Carmine yelled consolingly as she hugged and patted him.

“What would actually happen if an A.I. avatar died?” Miko asked, having turned away from the window. Because of this, she missed the view of the Ant Hill floor, with Lexi and Kalluto in view outside the tower.

“I presume the NerveGear device would still explode.” Boly answered. “It is advised that Eddy remain away when this happens.”

“Yeah…” Miko frowned as she looked at Boly. After their talk with CLU, she felt as if Boly knew some things that she didn’t.

Carmine decided to rest on the floor next to Kazma, her legs spread out in the same manner as him. “I’m just excited by how well we’re doing. To be honest… I’ve been a little under the weather lately.”

“Yeah?”

“Uh-huh… remember when we mentioned that our first leader died?”

“Carmine, don’t.” Miko said. “It was an accident. Drake wouldn’t be mad at you.”

“That’s what I keep trying to say, but it’s hard. That’s why I wanna do a good job… so, he’ll be proud of me.”

“Awe, he totally is proud.” Jenny said, rolling up to ruffle her hair. “We’re glad you’re still sticking with us.”

“Haha! I’m really glad to have you guys. Though I kind of wish we brought Jataro with us. I wonder if he got the game…”

“Who’s Jataro?” Kazma asked.

“He’s this boy that I hang out with. Well, we… kinda kissed.” She creased up cutely, cheeks flushed. “Hehe, he’s really cute! He thought I was ugly, but in a good way.”

“Ugh, cringe.” he chortled.

“What does that mean?”

“Romantic stuff is gross. People bein’ all mushy-mushy kissy faced…”

“Someone’s never been in love.” Jenny sneered.

“H-Hey, take that back! For your information, I…”

“Hwow, this elevator sure takes forever!” Miko yelled to break the tension. “Let’s see, there’s a big black city,” Level 55 was Granzam, a city of black steel with a medieval theme, “there’s a big mountainy place,” Floor 56 was Pani, a region of towering mountains, “and there’s another place… another… almost there, aaaaaaaand FLOOR 62!”

The group disembarked and left the Elevator Tower. Cutie Park appeared to be enveloped in eternal twilight. All kinds of rides and circus tents surrounded the central square, but there appeared to be a handy amount of heart and “xoxo” symbols. The central colors appeared to be red, pink, or chocolate. “Uhh…what kind of park is this?” Kazma asked worriedly as they walked forward.

“Hello, friends! Welcome to Cutie Park!”

A vibrant, pink-haired girl seemed to pop up on a hologram projector. She had a colorful hair ribbon with plugs at the ends, wore carney’s attire, and resembled a stereotypical girl from an anime dating sim. “My name is .GIFfany, but you may spell me as Giffany. Cutie Park is the magical world where romance blooms and true love is born!”

“Oh, you gotta be kidding me!” Kazma shouted, earning a laugh from the girls.

“Hey, Giffany!” Miko greeted. “We’re looking for a Pure Heart.”

“I could be your Pure Heart if you wish~ I swing both ways!”

“Yeah, thanks, but we’re looking for an actual…”

“Unable to discern approximate location for the Pure Heart.” Boly said.

“Well, do you know a good place we can explore?”

“All individuals are required to pay 100,000 Cor entry fee.” Giffany said.

“WHAT?! We don’t have that kind of money! Ugh, do we have to start farming Slimes?!”

“Is there any way we can get in cheaper?” Jenny asked.

“Well, of course! Cute couples get in free! So long as you’re with a special someone, no fee is required! This is a poor business practice!”

“Ah, well, that works.” Miko smiled. “Because we’re a group of three boys and three girls. We just gotta triple date!”

“Uh, excuse me??” Kazma gawked.

“Teehee! Then may I please see the couples in question?”

Quill sighed. “This is ridiculous. In that case… I pick Carmine.” He took her hand.

“Aww, Quill! I’m flattered!” She bent down to peck his cheek with a kiss.

“And here’s my boyfriend!” Jenny rolled next to Kazma, hand grasped.

“What? I don’t wanna date yeeeeeeeee…!” His teeth grit as Jenny smooshed his toes beneath her rollers.

“Uhhh…” Miko noticed she was still dateless. Trying to think of who was still available, she glanced down at Carmine’s pocket. “And here’s my boyfriend!” She snatched up the motionless Eddy. “Haha! He’s as cute as a doll and I couldn’t resist him!” She pecked him with a few kisses.

“Teehee! You all look like super adorbs couples! And that’s all the admission I need! Please, enjoy the park!” She disappeared.

“Thank you, Gif!” Miko waved as the group merrily bypassed the gate.

“Hokay, obstacle one breached.” Quill said, holding Carmine’s hand to look the part. “If you can’t pinpoint the Pure Heart, then is there at least a place we can eat?”

“If we proceed in approximately this direction, there should be an eatery.”

They proceeded as directed and eventually found an outdoor restaurant: it was called ‘Locked Lips,’ and it depicted a silhouetted design of Lady and the Tramp, during the spaghetti kiss scene. “God, I’m gonna be sick!” Kazma cringed.

“Shut up!” Jenny tugged on his hand. “There are worse ways to force a pairing.”

“I don’t think so.”

The tables were set up on a platform and naturally heart-shaped. They would have to order food from the lower stand before carrying it up to the platform. Miko ordered a large burger and fries, picking off a few pieces to stick in little Eddy’s mouth. Naturally, sharing the food would bestow more HP and stat boosts. Quill and Carmine ordered a hot fudge Couple’s Cake and fed each other to bring out the full taste. “It isn’t as good as the festival cake, but it’s so sweet!” she cheered as chocolate oozed from her mouth.

“It’d probably be stronger if we were actually an item.”

“Ooooo, look what I got us, Kazzy!” Jenny bore a teasing smile as she rolled up with a bowl of spaghetti in hand.

“Ugh, you got that Lady and the Tramp crap?!”

“Hey, I know I ain’t much of a lady, but yooooouu sort of look the Tramp part~”

“Forget it, I’m not hungry, anymore.” He pushed himself up and walked away.

“I’m only teasing! Come on, you need a health refill.”

“Then I’ll get my own thing.” Kazma proceeded down the stairs on that statement.

Jenny frowned in dismay. As the others stared after him, she could already suspect what was wrong. “That’s not the only reason he hates romance, is it?”

His head was hung as he slowly stepped down the stairs. He wasn’t sure why he was so frustrated… It was only an act just to get into the park. And Kazma himself didn’t “love” anyone, anyway. He might’ve seen a few cute girls here or there, but it was nothing. He never knew any girl that…

Just as he stepped off the bottom of the stairs, a person in a dark-green, cat-earred hoodie passed him, head down as they focused on a handheld game. “…?!” Kazma’s pupils shrank at the familiar hoodie. His mouth cracked open in a small gape. As she ascended the stairs slowly, he studied her pale-beige skirt and long, black stockings with pink Mary-Janes. But she… no, she couldn’t be… she couldn’t-

“Hey!” His voice escaped him before he could think. The girl stopped. Sector Q looked over the rail curiously, wondering why he called out.

The girl reached up and pulled back her hood. Kazma grew breathless at the back of the pale mauve hair. The girl calmly turned, staring with a pair of pale, pink, tired eyes. “Is something wrong?” she asked in a soft, tired, gentle voice.

The sound of that voice against his eardrums tugged at his heart. He had to be going crazy, only seeing an illusion. But it was then that Miko spoke up: “No way!” she gasped. “That...that looks like…!”

“Ch…Chi…Chiaki!”

Chapter Text

I think it’s safe to call this chapter this year’s Valentine’s special! That said, there is one more scene I wanted to add, but this chapter became way too effing long. XD

There was no mistaking her. Those eyes that looked like soft, sweet peaches, and a pink cat backpack to go with her dark-green hoodie. “Chiaki?” Jenny repeated. “Didn’t Eddy say that she…”

“Yeah. I’m Chiaki.” The girl in question confirmed. “Are you one of my viewers?”

Kazma didn’t know how to answer. Of course, he was technically a viewer, but… why was she just acting like nothing was wrong? He had to lift the bang covering his right eye, making sure he wasn’t fooling himself. “But… how? Everyone said you died.”

“Hmmm…” She put a finger to her chin in thought. “My memory’s a little fuzzy… how did I die again?”

“A giant hand came from the sky and ripped your hometown out of the Earth. Somebody commented that a piece of rubble hit your head and… we never saw a new video again.”

“A giant hand?” Carmine asked. “That’s pretty weird.”

“That does seem kind of unusual.” Chiaki agreed. “But I guess the universe is full of strange things. Sort of like a game. If I hit my head, maybe I just have amnesia or something.”

“What do you mean ‘or something’?!” Kazma yelled, letting his bang drop. “If you were still alive, at least one of your friends would’ve posted about it! But everyone said you were dead!”

“Oh…well, I’m here now. Sorry if you’re disappointed.”

“B-b-but…”

“Wait, what if she’s in the hospital?” Carmine suggested. “What if her head was in critical condition and they’re struggling to keep her alive? I wonder if… she was given a NerveGear setup the same as the other comatose people? Maybe they’re hoping Aincrad can revive her conscience?”

“I see… that would make sense.” Chiaki glanced up thoughtfully. “Snoooore…” She hung her head in slumber, a little snot bubble growing from her nose.

“Hey, you can’t get tired in this game!” Kazma popped her bubble and woke her. “Let’s assume that is true… do you remember me? I’m King Kazma.”

“King… Kazma? Hmm…there is a gamer with that screen-name. I think he’s popular…”

“W-Well… more like infamous.” He blushed. “But we know each other… kinda! I left a comment on your video, and then you started to watch my videos.”

“I don’t remember that… What kind of comment was it?”

“Uh…it doesn’t actually matter, anymore.” He turned around sheepishly, brushing his foot on the—“Yee!” he nearly slipped off the step and grabbed the rail. “I mean… I sort of advised you on something, and then you accepted the advice, then… you became better, so yippee.”

“You ‘advised’ her on something?” Jenny cocked a brow. “Given what we know about you, you sure it wasn’t-”

“Shut up! It doesn’t matter, anyway.” He turned back around. “We only talked a few times, so… it’s not like we were really friends.”

“I kind of thought you would say, ‘It’s not like I like you, baka.’” Chiaki said.

“Ghhh!” He grit his teeth. “That joke is overused!”

The operatives shared a laugh. “But even so…” Chiaki stepped down. She was several inches taller than Kazma and looked taller on the step, like a senior student standing over a junior. “It seems like you really care about me.” She gently lifted the bang back up to view into his small, dark eyes. “Are you sure we weren’t really friends?”

“Well… not close friends.”

“So, we’ve never met in real life? Though, if I’m in a hospital, I guess we couldn’t exactly hang out.”

“No… I guess not. …So, are you here to eat?”

“Not really. I’m sort of just wandering around.”

“I don’t suppose you’ve seen a heart anywhere?”

Chiaki looked around at all the many heart designs that filled the park. “Yeah, I see plenty of hearts.”

Kazma slapped his forehead. “Have you seen any particularly special hearts? Like a really shiny one that rotates?”

“Uhh…I’m not sure. I’ve sort of been playing my game.”

“What kind of game you playing in a game world?” Kazma stepped up and looked over her shoulder. It was a 2D platform game with a big-mouthed cat chomping food.

“Hey, Chomp Kitty!” Miko beamed. “Way to go, Chiaki!”

“They only have Hinobi titles in this world.” she said. “They’re good, but I’d like some variety.”

“They sell their own games in their own game.” Kazma rolled his eyes. “Man…”

“So, what is this heart you’re looking for?”

“Well, if we find it, we’ll be able to log out of the game. We can stop Infinite!”

“Really? That’s pretty cool. I guess I could help you look for it.”

“Ya…you will?”

“Although, I don’t think I can leave myself. It’ll just be you.”

“Oh…” Kazma only then figured it didn’t make a difference to her.

“Yeah, we should really start looking.” Quill decided. “Since we’re already ‘paired’ with each other, why don’t we split up into our pairs and search the park? Jenny, you can go with Kazma and-”

“No, it’s okay!” Kazma said. “I’ll just stick with Chiaki. Jenny’s fast, so she can cover more ground on her own.”

“Yeah, he’s not wrong.” Jenny figured. …She couldn’t help but look suspiciously at the girl.

Kazma stepped down the stairs and looked up at Chiaki with a smile. “So… you coming?”

“Yeah.” She smiled and stepped down to join him. “Where are your shoes?”

“Ah…I’m a homey boy.” He blushed and flexed his right leg. “Besides, you’ll find that I can be very fast on my feet!” With that, he transformed into his taller white rabbit form, dwarfing Chiaki at six feet.

“Ooo!” Her eyes lit up as she reached to ruffle his face fur. “Big bunny.”

“Haha, I knew you would like it! You had that magical girl bunny as your avatar, so… I decided to make my own cool bunny.”

“Aww, how sweet!” Miko cooed.

Kazma shot her a glare. However, Chiaki was already climbing onto his shoulders. “Carry me.” She stated simply.

“Huh? Uh, okay!” The rabbit dashed across the park with Chiaki’s hair and hood flailing behind her.

“He sure is happy now!” Carmine smiled. “I’m glad!”

“I just hope he stays focused.” Quill said. “Okay, let’s start looking.”

“Hey, Carmine, you wanna carry Pocket Eddy some more?” Miko asked.

“Uh, okay. How come?”

“I just don’t have any comfy pockets on me. Besides… I’d like to be alone with Boly for a bit.”

Sometime later

Quill and Carmine were steering RC cars around a small racetrack. Their cars were tethered, requiring them to stay together as they raced enemy cars. “I’m pretty bad at this, aren’t I?” Carmine chuckled. “I can tell you’re holding yourself back.”

“No, it’s fine.” Quill smiled. “I’m not getting ‘Pure Heart’ vibes from this game, anyway. …But since we’re alone, I sort of wanted to talk to you.”

“About what?”

“I…I’ve kinda been thinking… I’ve been thinking of leaving the KND.”

“Oh…”

…

“Mmmmm!” In the real world, Eddy was blissfully shuffling cozily under his blanket. He had taken a nice bath and had locked himself in a fantasy while trying to get to sleep. “Miko, stop poking me…”

“And, you know… we keep telling ourselves that Drake would’ve wanted us to stay, and he’s proud of us… but is that really true? How do we know that he wouldn’t want us to leave? If he wouldn’t want us to live normal, happy lives?”

Eddy heard Quill’s voice from his computer. He turned over and opened his eyes.

“Um…I guess that’s a good question.” Carmine replied. “But we’re one of the best sectors. We’re great at our job. That’s why Drake didn’t want me to leave. Even after my accident, he believed in me.”

“But what if the job belonged to someone else? Like… responsible grown-ups?”

“Why are you asking that?”

Eddy narrowed his eyes in suspicion. His avatar was tucked in Carmine’s pocket, so his camera couldn’t get a good image, but it seemed they assumed he was asleep.

“I’m just saying that… it feels like kids like us shouldn’t be tasked with this. Even if we wanted to fight for the world, it’s better to wait until we’re grown up and well-trained.”

“I see your point. And… I guess I have been there a few times myself… after what happened to Drake.”

“Drake… Sally… Darcy… Danny… Leanne… even our parents were targeted just because we were operatives. All these horrible things happen to us…”

“But it’s not like… it’s all in vain, right? We’ve done great things. We’ve saved whole worlds, defeated evil gods and demons, and made people happy… well, I guess we haven’t done some of those things, but the saving people part is true.”

“But we’re not happy.” Quill sighed. “We shouldn’t have to suffer like this. Just look at Chris. He couldn’t take it, anymore…”

Carmine bent down and softly embraced him in a hug. “I’m sorry, Quill. I still feel terrible about Drake… and I don’t think I deserve to be here. But when I imagine myself giving up… I start to feel the same as when… my skin was ruined. I start to feel useless…”

“It isn’t about being useful or useless… it’s about living. And living happy.”

“But I am happy.” Carmine released him and stood. She raised her hands toward the orange sky, which helped to highlight their own beauty. “I’m happy to be on missions with you guys. I feel strong when I’m fighting villains… and proud. I hate having to wear that suit, and I feel ugly… but I have to remember that I’m beautiful on the inside. I have a cute smile! I can make other people smile!” She twirled around and hop-skipped in place. “I might not get to feel the warm earth beneath my feet, but I love to live on it! I love to protect it!”

Quill sported a chuckle. Her enthusiasm was so… pure. So heartwarming. “Then maybe I’m the one who’s wrong…” He looked away.

“No, you’re not.” She put a hand to his shoulder. “That’s just how I feel. If you really wanna quit, then you can.”

“I don’t really know what I want, anymore. I guess just… being trapped in this game is really getting to me. I feel completely powerless. And it doesn’t help that Eddy isn’t taking this seriously.”

Eddy felt his brain throb. “What do you mean by that?” Carmine asked.

“I just feel like he’s making one too many quips. I get that he’s watching over our bodies, but he doesn’t understand what kind of stress we’re feeling.” An angry Eddy crawled out of his bed, vision blurry from lack of glasses. He scrambled to grab his controller. “He gets to work from the safety of his room while we-”

“I’ll have you know I AM taking this seriously!”

“YAH!” Carmine fell on her butt when Eddy suddenly sprung out of her pouch. He dropped on the ground and stomped past her feet on his way to Quill. Quill thought he would enjoy seeing a tiny Eddy, but found himself shirking backward at his friend’s anger.

“I was planning to stay awake all night and help you guys, but you said I should go to goddamn sleep! You actually have the nerve to put me down after all I’ve been doing?! Well, I HOPE you quit! Goddamn ungrateful!” The real Eddy pushed himself up and plopped back onto his bed in the opposite position.

“W-Wait! I didn’t mean it like that, Eddy!” Quill told the avatar. “Er…Eddy?”

“I guess he left.” Carmine gently picked him back up. “Quill, that wasn’t nice…”

Quill sighed. “Let’s just keep looking for the heart.” He proceeded to the next park attraction somberly.

Carmine followed, staring down at Eddy with sympathy. “…Hehe. I have such big hands.” She chuckled, in need of some levity. “…Big… hands…” She thought back to what Kazma said, about a giant hand in the sky. A giant hand… that ripped Chiaki’s town out of the earth… “…Hey, Quill? What was the name of Chiaki’s hometown?”

“I dunno. Why?”

“Uh…no reason.”

Eddy hugged his bed and shut his eyes tight. He couldn’t get back to his fantasy and was too frustrated to sleep. His phone buzzed, so he lazily pulled it up. A text from Index seemed to read, Where is your group? Sector SA wants to meet up.

He hastily texted back, Floor 62, Cutie Park.

Elsewhere in the park

Jenny grinded along a roller coaster and kicked down an array of targets with varying point values. “YEAH! Hittin’ the jackpot, baby!” She skid to a halt at the ending platform and let her inventory fill with Cor. “As soon as we fix this game, I’m gonna live it up, baby! …” She looked down at the ground and could see Kazma and Chiaki about to enter a Tunnel of Love. “Ugh…are you kidding me? Pfft, no way am I missing this.”

Jenny zoomed down the coaster’s platform and rolled straight for the tunnel. Kazma changed back into a human as they settled on a boat, slowly carried inside. Jenny zoomed up the stairs as the next boat flowed by and stylishly flipped in. “I liked her ‘no spoiler’ policy,” Kazma continued the conversation, “but my god, her lewd sense of humor completely ruined a great game. Not to mention she’s a total Goomba racist! I mean, I’m not too big on Goomba culture, but calling them ‘No Arms’ all the time in that smug fashion has to be offensive.”

“That’s the problem when Let’s Players try to be funny. They end up putting more attention on their selves than the game.”

“Exactly! Commentators need to have organic humor. They need to be engaged to the game and let jokes flow out naturally.”

“Yeah. I’m not exactly good at jokes myself.”

“Well, the important part is the engagement. Although… you probably don’t remember, but you kind of had trouble showing enthusiasm in your videos. That’s the advice I was talking about earlier! And… afterward, you started to talk about the games more, showed a bit of emotion… and you watched my videos, too!”

“Did I like your videos?”

“Er, yeah! Generally. …Heh.” Kazma turned away with a blush. “Though, when I first left that comment… I thought you would be mad at me. Most other gamers I give ‘advice’ to don’t appreciate it. They’re fine with how they do things and don’t care about my input.”

Jenny rolled her eyes at his ego. The river was taking the form of a watery rainbow. The borders were a misty pink as an illusion of space surrounded them, magical with shooting stars and auroras. “Well, different people do different things.” Chiaki replied. “There are no straight roads.”

“I know, but—hah, I love that game! But the problem is their ‘fans’ revere them as the greatest people ever. These wannabe celebrities are no different from any other gamer, or even any other LPer. They think they’re on top of the world because a million people love them, but they could care less for any individual fan. The only people they consider friends are the ones who are up with them. They’re a fucking high class society among gamers, and no one likes those kinds of pricks.”

“Don’t say that to Sector $, dude.” Jenny smirked.

“Hmm…I guess I’m the same.” Chiaki frowned, shyly pulling her hoodie up. “I remember having a ton of fans… but there’s only so many usernames I recall. I don’t remember any individual people, or even any friends. I… must have hit my head pretty hard.”

Kazma put a hand to her leg. “No… you were different from those other gamers. You were nice. You didn’t just want mindless commenters, you wanted to have a real conversation. I…” As he glanced away sheepishly, Chiaki put one of her hands down over his. “When I left that comment… all your fans got mad at me and threatened me… but you deleted their comments and took my side. That was… the nicest thing anyone’s done for me.”

Jenny smiled at the sentiment. In the short time she’s known him, she never expected Kazma to be so open. “…snooooore…” Chiaki fell asleep.

“Hey!” He popped her bubble.

“Huh? Sorry. It’s pretty warm in here. And the mist is in my eyes.”

“Oh, yeah. Heh, these are nice graphics.”

“They are. Also… I was happy to hear that.” She smiled. “I’m glad that I made you happy.”

Kazma blushed. He leaned against the older girl’s arm, enjoying the ride in peace and quiet. The rainbow river would make a few snaky turns, go down a swirly part, and then up a loop-di-loop. “Uh…Chiaki?” he began sheepishly. “I…I like you…”

“Really?”

“Yeah. You just… I feel like you get me. You get me more than any of my fans or friends. Eddy gets me, but…but this is different. I feel so… warm around you.”

“You’re a sweet boy. I feel… pretty warm myself. I’m happier… than I’ve ever felt. It’s like a dream… and I never want to wake up…”

Jenny frowned in concern. For being a girl with amnesia, she was warming up to him fairly well. Even so… she could tell that Kazma’s feelings were genuine. This was the most special girl in the world to his eyes. His love was strong. Even his very heart-shaped boat began to shine with that love.

“By the way… my real name is Kazuma.”

“Kazuma? That’s not much different from Kazma.”

“It’s different enough.”

“Ka-zu-ma… in English, that becomes ‘good, main, horse.’”

“Ha ha ha. Yep.”

Chiaki giggled. “You must be… a very noble steed.”

“I sure am…” He grinned with a mix of embarrassment and flattery.

Jenny cringed once more. “…?” Her eyes fell to the back of their boat. The pink heart shape was flashing a dark-blue and wavy texture. “?!” The shape shrank slightly and began to rotate. “…KAZMA!”

“AAAH!” He jumped out of his seat and nearly fell off the boat. He turned in panic. “J-J-JENNY?! WHAT’RE YOU DOING HERE?!”

“Never mind that! Look!”

Kazma climbed on the seat and looked over. “Th…The Pure Heart?”

“Haha! I don’t know how, but I guess we found it! C’mon, grab it!”

Kazma reached down and picked the heart up. As he felt its beat and gazed into its hypnotic beauty… he could feel a tickle in his own heart. “Now we’re even closer… to finding them all.”

“Once you have them… you’ll be able to go home.” Chiaki said.

“Yeah…”

“But… I won’t be able to come with you.”

“You…you won’t… because in the real world, you’re…”

Jenny grew concerned again. There was an air of dread… becoming mixed with the warm love… (Play “Vector to the Heavens” from Kingdom Hearts.)

“I can’t live… in the real world.”

“Yeah… but you’re alive in this world. If I stay here… I can be with you…”

“You can stay here… if you want…”

“Kazma!” Jenny opened her hands. “Give me the heart!”

“I…” Kazma sat back down and leaned on Chiaki. “I feel… so warm around you. No one in the real world gets me. My parents don’t get me… my friends don’t get me… All those other gamers frustrate me. But you don’t. I thought I would never get to meet you… but here you are.”

“Kazma!”

Chiaki softly put her arms around him. The Pure Heart was pressed between them, a symbol of their union. “As long as you stay here… I’ll never disappear. Let’s be together… forever…”

Jenny growled and brought up her inventory screen. She changed her roller-blades out for a pair of water ski shoes with turbo heels, kicking out of her boat and surfing up to theirs.

A giant heart staff with angel wings splashed in the river and blocked her. An enormous, pudgy, white, winged rabbit with a pink frilly skirt loomed above them. As Chiaki warmly held Kazma in her arms, they were safely tucked into the rabbit’s chest. They flew far over the Rainbow River as Jenny gave chase.

Boss fight: Usami

As Jenny surfed the snaky Rainbow River, Usami cast Cupid Missiles from her wand. The missiles stayed along the river’s path, but she jumped them while making the tight turns. Usami cast a column of missiles as Jenny slid down a sloped segment, then to angle up as Jenny launched herself high, flying over the missiles. She landed on another slope and performed a second momentum jump, evading the missiles. She was sliding to another ramp, but the missiles were thrown above this time, so she avoided jumping and zipped back down the next slope. Missiles rained from directly above, but Jenny kept her speed, flew up the next ramp, and straight to Usami’s belly. She spun and slammed her foot into the rabbit, knocking her back, then used a turbo boost to shoot over for a kick to the chest, directly striking Chiaki’s head. “Hey! Let Kazma go!” she yelled as she tried to tear him away.

Chiaki’s sleepy-eyed body seemed to glitch for a second. “I…I don’t want to disappear…”

Usami slapped Jenny away and flew further across the river. The river drastically widened as Usami splashed it, sending a great wave that Jenny would jump. She gasped, realizing the other side of the wave was void, except for a strip of river that she landed on. Usami cast shockwaves, which Jenny jumped, but each wave would shift the river’s position and direction, prompting her to readjust herself. She made a good left landing, but then the river turned right diagonal, in which only her right foot secured a landing. She stayed balanced until the next jump, in which the river curved directly left and horizontal. Only the heels of her shoes landed on the edge, flailing backwards to readjust herself. She twisted and boosted toward Usami, who splashed the river directly upward, but Jenny jumped and boosted through the water to kick Chiaki.

Half of her head seemed to snap off, exposing code underneath. “Are you even the real Chiaki?! Or just a Program that Hinobi wrote in?”

“I…I can be real… if you want me to be…”

Usami retreated through the center of a vortex, composed of multiple loops in the river. The sky around Jenny spun as she pursued, but Usami stayed lined up with her. She readied a bow and launched three giant arrows, their tips connected by strings. Jenny had to skate along the twister in evasion. Usami then tried to shoot ahead of Jenny, prompting her to slow down and wait for them to pass. She then resumed skating as Usami lined up with her again, shooting another three. Jenny thought keeping her speed would dodge them, but these arrows were actually slower, so she nearly crashed into them on the next loop. She slowed herself in time and kept going as the swirl then reached its end.

But the end of the river would follow as Usami flew off into the vastness of space. She decided to loose one last arrow as Jenny leapt off the end of the river. She landed along the arrow’s body and could make another jump. Usami launched two arrows, Jenny jumped the first, followed by the second. Usami launched another: Jenny was tempted to jump, but realized this arrow was longer. Usami shot an arrow above it, having intended to trick Jenny into jumping against it, but she didn’t fall for the ruse, only making the jump once she reached the end. This was followed by a rapid sequence of arrows that Jenny jumped like stairs. Usami could only ready the last arrow on her bow by the time Jenny landed on it, creating a perfect path into her chest.

Jenny kicked on a boost and pierced straight through the chest. She shoved Chiaki and Kazma straight out the back as they all began to plummet toward the planet. Jenny gave her boosts some more juice to catch up. “But I… Is that what I would really say?” Giant hearts spawned to block Jenny, who maneuvered around them. “They just told me to ‘be Chiaki.’” Strips of rainbow water crossed her path, requiring Jenny to either dodge or boost through. “Am I really Chiaki… or just a copy?” She could feel pure sadness in her voice as Jenny dodged an array of arrows. “Is this love real… or just a program?” Arrows fell from above next, and Jenny could latch on them to help her catch up. “If Chiaki is as nice as you say… then maybe it’s wrong to keep you here.”

Jenny could cling onto one arrow long enough to reach the couple. Kazma gracefully slipped out of Chiaki’s arms, the Pure Heart in his own. His eyes teared as he reached out to her, but Chiaki was fading into the stars. “Kazuma… I’m sure Chiaki wishes… she could have met you, too.”

In a moment, Chiaki disappeared. A large golden key replaced her. Jenny seized Kazma and guided him to splash into a normal river. (End song.)

They gasped for breath upon resurfacing. Jenny hauled the boy up onto land as the key dinged and bounced nearby. The heart also flashed and flew away. “Huff…huff…” Jenny stood to collect the key. “Sigh…so, she was just a boss. She wasn’t… the real…”

Kazma sat and dipped his feet in the river. He stared over his own damp, glum reflection. He saw Jenny step over him. “I’m so pathetic. Can’t believe I fell for it. Can’t believe I thought she would actually like me. Weird enough she was nice to me at all.”

Jenny didn’t know how to fix heartbreak, let alone one like this. He was really opened up to her. Probably ranted about all kinds of gamers before Jenny came along. And Chiaki listened, like the kind girl she was. Jenny sat beside him. “…I had a crush on Drake.”

He glanced at her. “The… old leader?”

“Yeah. Like, I don’t get lovesick, and I never said it out loud… but I liked him. He was kind and handsome and… a great leader. But after he died, I…I started to wonder if my feelings meant anything. If I told him how I felt, and he liked me back, would I have just been more heartbroken? Maybe it’s good that I never told him. We were never meant to be, anyway. Now I can just… store these feelings away and pretend they never existed.”

“…” Kazma sniffled. In just an instant, his eyes and nose began pouring, dripping into the river. “Aaaaaahhhhh!” His feelings burst out in the form of a bellow. Jenny leaned over and hugged him. He tried to store those feelings away, too… but then he wondered if Chiaki would’ve actually liked him. If he just admitted the truth before and faced rejection, at the very least, he could’ve safely thrown those feelings away. She was only an online person, anyway… so his feelings couldn’t have been that strong. It was only… because of Hinobi that…

“Why…why did Hinobi write her into this game? Why did they… make her say those things?”

“I’d like to know myself.”

Kazma sniffled and helped himself onto his feet. Balling his fist tight, he faced the tunnel’s exit. “Just what were they thinking… with this game?!”

Several minutes earlier…

After exploring a few attractions in the park, Miko turned a corner in search of another good—“AH!” she yelped at the statue of a familiar character: a large, brown bear in Western clothes, standing before a “Ralphie’s Fun House” attraction. “Oh, you have gotta be kidding me.” Miko whimpered. Ralphie Bear was an animatronic at Joystick Junior Arcades, which was under Hinobi’s ownership. Miko wasn’t a fan of the bear, quite scared of him in fact, especially after Five last invited her to the restaurant. “Five’s Night at Ralphie’s” was one she wouldn’t be forgetting. “You just know they’re gonna make Cakey von Smasher the boss.”

“Data unavailable.” Boly replied. “But if you believe the boss is in there, perhaps the heart will be, too.”

“Maybe I should call the others first…”

“I am certain that no foes within could be a match for you, Miko. There is no reason to fear.”

“…” Miko turned away from the building and asked, “Boly, I need to know… why was Flynn so fixated on me?”

“You are a highly developed human gamer, a dedicated member of Hinobi, and are about to be the savior of Aincrad.”

“I just feel like there’s something you’re not telling me.”

“All information will become available, once we have retrieved the last four hearts.”

“But I wanna know now! I… hang on…” Miko counted her fingers, “Dragon Tower, race karts, Sayu… that’s only three hearts. There are eight hearts, right?”

“A-Affirmative.”

“…” Miko glared at her. “Boly, what are you hiding from me?”

“That information is not vital at this point.”

“The heck it isn’t! Either you tell me or I-”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”

“AAAAH!” Miko scrambled back in panic when Ralphie Bear flew out of the tent, a sword lodged in his back and parts of him torn and sparking.

A tall, muscular man leapt out, retrieved the sword, and sliced his head off. He had light-brown hair, a beard, and gray armor. “Keep trying, Ralphie, you’ll never…?” He looked up slightly. “Miko?”

“Uh…hey!” She grinned panickingly. “Big muscle swordsman! Long time, no see! Because I don’t think we ever… met!”

“Miko, it’s me!” He stepped over Ralphie and approached her. “Phil.”

“Ph…Phil? Whoa, when did you beef up?”

“It’s an avatar, genius. Well, not exactly… I didn’t wanna enter the game directly, but I got help from a little friend of yours and hacked this character in.”

“Ohhh…” Miko nodded, mentally figuring out who this ‘friend’ was. “I getcha.”

“Surprised I actually found you on this floor. Only reason I’m here is…eh, forget that. I needed to talk to you about something else.”

“Is something happening?”

“Not exactly, but… Way back, I looked at one of Hinobi’s top secret files. This is what was written inside it.” He brought up a digital screen.

The Bio Program Project. By implanting Programs into mortal bodies, it will enable them to adapt to the real world without need of a computer source. With this means, perhaps we will be able to help the Core enter reality. However, implanting the Core in its entirety will destroy the host with its overwhelming chi. For that reason, only a small fraction of the Core’s chi was taken.

We’ve selected a candidate for the study, a married woman, but to avoid questions or interference, she will remain unaware of the truth. When she comes for a medical exam, we will implant the codes inside her in secret. She will undergo pregnancy and simply believe it to be hers and her husband’s doing. The “code” will be born as a human, but because their chi comes from the Core, there will likely be a surplus in Hinobi Glitches. In time, however, the Core may be able to enter reality, so long as the subject adapts. Until then, we will study them from afar.

Miko was dumbfounded by the article. Phil’s arrival was sudden enough… but what did this even mean? “Ooooo…kay?”

“I’ve had this file for at least a decade, but Corporate wiped my memory and made me forget I even had it. I don’t remember why I had it or why I stole it… but ever since I read it last year, I couldn’t stop thinking. And I…I’m starting to wonder if Aincrad has something to do with this.”

“The theft of classified articles is punishable by termination and total mind-wiping!” Boly shouted.

“What the heck is that?”

“Th-This is Boly. The MCP.”

“M…MCP?!” Phil stepped back in worry.

“Yeah, she…she…” Miko looked again at the article. The content was somewhat confusing, so she skimmed it over again. “Programs… in mortal bodies… the Core… What’s the Core?”

“I guess it means the Hinobi Core. The machine that… helps develop their software…” Phil stared suspiciously at the misty, holographic diamond over Miko’s glove. “Boly… why are you with Miko?”

“Miko is… helping me restore Aincrad… by collecting the Pure Hearts which form my code.”

Miko looked between Boly… and the article… and herself… She read the content once more. “Code born as a human… surplus of Hinobi Glitches… w-what does that mean? What does any of that mean?!”

“It is of no concern.” Boly answered. “We must find the Pure Hearts and defeat-”

“Boly.” Miko grasped her glove in the other hand, glaring the A.I. dead in the eye. “WHAT… AM I?”

“Y-Y-You’re…” She couldn’t help but shirk in shame. “You’re… my… heart…”

She was confused at first, wondering if this was some attempt at flattery. “…!” But just now, Boly mistakenly claimed there were four hearts left. There were eight Pure Hearts, but they only found three. Miko touched her chest. She closed her eyes and listened for her heartbeat.

Thump…thump…thump…

She could see the three hearts circling within her. The red one… orange one… yellow one…

…Thump.

And a purple one. No, that was… her own heart. The three hearts were orbiting hers… but her heart possessed a mystical violet glow. Violet like her own hair… Hair that no one else in her family had. Their hair was common and normal. But Miko’s was…

“WAAAAAAAAHHHH!” She clung her hair and cried to the heavens.

“M-Miko?” Phil gulped.

“No way… NO… WAY. So, the reason I absorb the hearts… and why you’re on me… it’s because…”

“You are a part of me.”

Miko dropped to her knees, almost thinking her heart would stop. Or, her hearts would—wait, no! “Th-This can’t be true! Are you saying I’m some… glitch hybrid?!”

“Hold on… the memory-wipe function never worked on you.” Phil remembered. “Was that because… Is it true?!”

“You are more than a glitch, Miko.” Boly answered spritely. “Together, we can become a perfect being.”

“W-W-W-WAIT! What the fuck is this about?! Why the hell did Hinobi do this?!”

“President Kayaba simply desired to grant my wish. My wish to become a ‘real’ being. Just as Aincrad is designed to turn people into what they wish to be, I wish to become a real, flesh-and-blood mortal. As we grow stronger together, Miko, I can feel us becoming one. I can feel your emotions… your experiences… your pain… Your prowess in physical activity is a sign of our connection. Our desire for perfection. But because you only received a small fraction of myself, your mental capabilities are undeveloped. This has resulted in less-than-sufficient physical results.”

“Wai-wai-wai-wai-wai-wai, slow the fuck down! Why didn’t you tell me any of this?!”

“It was Kayaba’s request. Because you would develop as a separate entity, he feared you may have reservations. If not you, then your friends would likely object.”

“Yeah, and why is that? What’s gonna happen if we ‘become one’ or whatever?!”

“It is as previously stated: we will become a perfect being. For our sake, and for Aincrad, it is of great benefit. Unfortunately, for illogical reasons, some mortals fear such a development.”

“Darn right I fear it! Get the fuck off my arm!” She desperately tried to shove the glove off.

“You needn’t fear, Miko.” As Boly spoke, the eyes of the severed Ralphie head sparked an eye symbol within the pupils. “Once we are complete, we can undo Infinite’s faults and restore our players back to reality.”

“Miko, don’t tear your arm off!” Phil grabbed her shoulder. “Look, I’m pretty pissed off, too. And you can bet I’ll have a few words for Kayaba once we find him! But we gotta stop Infinite somehow.”

“J-Just, find Infinite in the real world! My friends say he works for Dr. Eggman?”

“Eggman, huh? In that case, I—HYAH!” A blue sword was thrown and cut his hip.

“That was some pretty delicious lore you’ve told me!” A skinny robot with a computer head, blue screen, and darker-blue cape with code marched up to them. His right dual sword respawned in hand. “This girl is the MCP’s vessel, huh? No wonder she’s so special. Once we dissect her, perhaps then we can unlock the ultimate power of this world!”

Phil charged and chopped his blade down at XANA, who raised both swords in defense. He glitched above Phil to slash his head, but he dodged and batted him away with his blade. “Two Pure Hearts detected!” Boly exclaimed.

“Oh, PERFECT time to change the subject, Boly! Yeah, TWO Pure Hearts, very funny!”

“There is no humor in my alert. A secondary heart is arriving on this floor as we speak.”

Elevator Tower

Sector SA had been given the same greeting by Giffany. “So, if we wanna get in free, we just have to play match-up.” Nagisa said. “I can hook with Morgie, Killua can hook with Fie, then… I guess you girls can be lesbians! Index with Goombella and Sinon with Millium!”

“Look, I don’t mind being gay, but she looks too young for me.” Sinon said.

“Love does not have an age limit!” Giffany cheered.

“Oh ho hokay, I think I should sit this one…?” The sniper felt her green heart beginning to vibrate. “AAH!” It flashed and soared across the park, the environment turning dark.

Around the same time, the indigo heart flew out of the Rainbow River. Miko saw their lights as the blue and purple rhythm platforms formed near her. “Aha!” XANA sneered. “Give them to m-” Phil jumped and pinned the robot down.

“Miko, we must seize the hearts before the rogue glitch can take them!” Boly ushered.

“N-No! I don’t want the hearts, anymore!”

“I strongly advise retrieving the hearts!”

“Miko!” Phil was shoved off, but he clashed his blade against XANA’s. “It’ll be fine! I’m sure of it! I’d rather you have control of this game than these creeps!”

Her anxiety grew as she looked between Phil and the hearts. With a heavy gulp, she ran up the platforms. (Play “Golden Ridge Cassette” from Celeste!)

She jumped on a blue gun, followed by a pink heart. That gun shot a blue bullet when it reactivated, and the heart disabled as the bullet flew through it. Miko could ride said bullet to parallel columns of pink hearts, which Miko quickly Wall Jumped. When they dispelled, another bullet flew to catch her. A pink bullet was incoming, growing tangible to carry Miko the opposite direction. She landed on a platform at the base of a “hill” of floating skulls. Naturally, the skulls had the same colors, but were swapping on-and-off at a more rapid pace. Miko determined a good starting point and jumped her way up the skulls. Afterwards, she had to swing some floating ceiling fans, which changed under a slower rhythm.

Once past the fans, Miko landed on a skateboard that rode her across a rainbow road. Columns of blue and purple arrows were flung, in which Miko had to go through the inactive gaps. She ducked through a purple arrow beneath blue ones and jumped through some blue ones between purple. She then had to jump some arrows that changed at a faster pace, which was already in tune with her momentum. She landed on a blue slope traveling downward, increasing her speed. She jumped before the slope could deactivate and landed on a purple segment, repeated and landed on blue, then back to purple. The slope would dramatically curve upward, and her built momentum allowed her to cross the segments with the rhythm, without needing to jump. It wasn’t until she reached the end of the ramp did she perform a heroic leap and slap hands against both Pure Hearts.

A terrific surge of power erupted across the park, causing XANA and Phil to short circuit. The hearts were absorbed into Miko’s chest, the odd sensation making her feel like a balloon. Although the victory jingle played, Miko felt less than satisfied. (End song.)

“Uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh…!”

“Huh? Phil?!” Miko saw her former boss being electrocuted the same as XANA and rushed over.

“M-My computer’s freezing up! That was my… frustration cry!”

“Boly, I thought that would only harm the evil glitches!”

“Phil has illegally procured top secret files.”

“The hell with that!” Miko flashed her glove, but Phil’s digital body already began to derez.

“Agh…Miko… I’ll try to get back to you soon! I won’t… let Hinobi…”

The data scattered. In the real world, Phil saw the NerveGear light up, and ran before it could explode, along with his computer. “Huff…huff…”

There was a knock at the door, followed by Barbara’s voice. “Oh, Phil? I heard an explosion. What are you doing in there?”

“Wellp, this is comin’ outta my paycheck.”

…

“Hahahahaha!” XANA cackled, his form derezzing. “Well, what’s one little backup lost? We’ll have those hearts before long. Especially now that The Hacker has worked his magic on one! They will be OUUUURS!”

Just as XANA disappeared, Miko’s teammates finally regrouped. “Hey, Miko.” Jenny said. “We… found the hea-”

“Guuuuuuys!” They looked over to a strange group of eight racing over.

“HEY, strangers!” Millium jumped in her squiddy form. “Are you Sector Q?”

“Yeah, that’s them!” Index pointed. “We may not look it, but we’re Sector SA!”

“You’ll never guess what we’ve been up to!” Goombella called.

The Q’s were less than excited to return the greeting, having barely wrapped their heads around their individual events. “Uhhhh, why do we look so down?” Millium asked. “Did someone die? …Guys?”

Chapter Text

My Uncle Mike died today, February 15. Been in the hospital for about a week… really took us off guard.

Ant Hill

Lexi and Kalluto traveled back upward and stepped off on Level 46. The valley of insects was sealed off from the elevator area via a glass wall. There were wide tubes lined along the glass, but they would compress into smaller tubes as they let out on the other side. Lexi walked up to the glass and placed her forehead and hands to it. She looked over a very tiny mushroom town with tiny players. “They’re so tiny! I thought our avatars could only go down to 3 inches?”

“Hmm…” Kalluto studied a tube entrance. “Perhaps we have to use this-” He curiously took a few steps in, but as the tunnel compressed, his body shrank along with it. “Oh?”

“Whoa!” Lexi perked up when she came to see. “You shrunk!”

“Ah…” Kalluto looked up at the twice-as-tall Lexi with a neutral stare. “Well, at least we’ll be on equal ground with everyone else in here.”

“Man, do we have to shrink?” Lexi sighed. “They already had giant bugs on the flower floor, why can’t we just have tiny bugs here?”

“I don’t like it any more than you do. Ugh, I can just imagine my brothers looking down on me like some…ugh.” He shuddered at the frustrating thought. “But it shouldn’t matter since we’ll be secluded from the ‘big’ zone.”

Lexi gave in and followed, the tunnel expanding as she caught up to Kalluto’s level. As they crossed the mushroom town, Lexi viewed around at all the players going into the mushrooms. “Hey, Kalluto, are the NPCs just blended in with the actual players? I sort of feel like none of these buildings have actual characters in them. Are they just decorative or do they have collectibles?”

“I think I heard it was possible to buy your own house or business. Maybe these buildings are meant for the players in general. I even remember seeing some out in the greater valleys, I guess for players who wanted a more scenic home.”

“They actually expect people to ‘live’ in this game?”

“I mean… that’s sort of what we’re all doing now.”

“Yeah, but this was all a big accident, right? Unless this whole Infinite thing was a part of the game. Wouldn’t Hinobi get their butts sued big time?”

“Unless they had powerful backers. Like… Disney.”

“Pfft, why would Disney approve THIS?”

“Who knows?”

“Oh, you’re just being pessimistic. Between you and me, Hinobi games tend to glitch all the time. And not just your everyday glitches, I mean the glitches that LITERALLY try to kill you. But sooner or later, my big sister and her friends are gonna pull us out of here!”

“Even so, that’s no reason to not take action ourselves.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Lexi rolled her eyes as they began to venture off from the town. “But can’t we wait until the sun comes up? A lot of nasty bugs come out at night.”

“Sheikah become faster at night, and we have heightened senses.”

“Cool! …What are Sheikah?”

“We’re a race who are naturally adept to Ninjutsu.”

“Wow! No wonder you’re so cool!”

“Well, my skills are quite a few leagues above the average Sheikah my age. My training is especially more strict.”

“Is it like those movies where the student has to run across a mountain in bare feet while carrying ten jugs of milk?”

“No… it’s more like this.” Kalluto turned to her and untied his robe.

She instinctively shut her eyes from his nudity. …But after cracking them open a tad, they widened: Kalluto had numerous cuts along his skinny frame. “Uh…what the heck?”

“This is the Zoldyck Family tradition. As soon as we can walk, our training begins. My parents work to toughen and harden my skin, just enough to where it doesn’t impair me, and begin hammering the art of Rokushiki into my brain and body. Unless of course you’re my sweet older sister, who’s too ‘precious’ for such torture, and has never developed the heart of an assassin. Compared to that, karate is a little child’s game.”

He retied his robe and walked away. Lexi was left frozen in place, dumbfounded by the revelation. She didn’t know whether to focus on the assassin part or the torture. “…No wonder you’re so-” She turned, but… he was gone. “Uh…Kalluto?”

“Hissss…” Her heart skipped at the sound: she frightfully turned to find a giant snake looming over her. “AAAAH!”

But the tip of a grass blade flew around and sawed the snake’s head off. She saw Kalluto behind the grass. “Be careful. All kinds of predators lurk in the grass.”

He proceeded forward, with Lexi running to catch up. “It sounds like your family are a bunch of jerks.”

“Well, it has made me strong, and I take my teachings to heart. I can at least take solace in the fact that I surpass my siblings. Milluki is lazy, Alluka just goofs around, and Killua would rather go parading with ‘friends.’”

“Hm…” She narrowed her eyes. “Well, you know what I think?”

“What? HMP-!”

Lexi suddenly glomped the skinny boy in a tight squeeze. “You need a BIIIIIIG hug!”

Kalluto shoved her several meters away. “What do you think you’re doing?!”

“Don’t give me that act!” Lexi pushed up and stomped back to him. “No kid should be raised that way and you know it. You let me hang around you all this time because you wanted someone to talk to. You wanted a friend.”

“I hung around you because I considered it bodyguard training, and you were paying me. Otherwise, I think you’re annoying and I would’ve ditched you ages ago.”

“And how much allowance do you think I have, anyway?”

“Depends on what kind of family you belong to.”

“We Kubotas are an average family who make the average amount of income!” Lexi stepped up and poked him in the nose. “And I’ve got at least… $50 in my drawer! Is that enough for you?”

“That…that’s hardly enough!”

“Well, what’re you gonna do about it? Kill me?”

He grit his teeth and raised his fan to her neck, Lexi shutting her eyes and cringing in fear. “…?” She cracked an eye open. Kalluto’s violet eyes were cold and dark under his bangs. And yet, he was clearly hesitant, and his eyes were shaking. “…A firefly.”

“Whuh?” Lexi asked. She turned to see a giant firefly atop a grass blade. It flapped its wings and flew away. The kids watched mouths agape as it flew toward a distant, shining tree. “Whoa… that’s a lot of them.”

“Yeah…” Kalluto slowly stepped toward it.

“Do you… like fireflies?”

“Well, they are pleasant. When I was four, my parents dropped me out in the woods one night. I had to survive the night, run, and hide from a bunch of monsters. Eventually, I found a hidden garden of fireflies. I thought their bright lights would’ve given away my location, but the monsters never came near them. Perhaps they hated the light.”

“Awww! So, the fireflies protected you!”

“Perhaps, but I’m more than capable of protecting myself now.”

“Man, if only I still had my…?” Lexi brought up her U.I.. “Wait…” She clicked an image and transformed into her Draconian form. “I can change into my avatar again?!”

“Huh?” Kalluto was taken aback by her wings, claws, fangs, and horns. “So, that’s your avatar.”

She lit her body with lightning as she flapped her wings and lifted off. “We should be able to blend in like this! I’m like a lightning bug! Wanna grab on?”

“I’m not sure. This game has been really picky with flight mechanics.”

“Let’s just go see if the boss is in the firefly tree!”

“I suppose…” Kalluto climbed onto Lexi’s back. The dragon rose from the grass and soared to the flies. (Play “Fireflies” by Owl City!)

As they drew nearer to the tree, dozens more fireflies fluttered past them, blissful as they joined their friends amongst the leaves. There were boarded walkways and huts suspended along the branches. Lexi landed on a walkway, gazing at the glimmering bugs in awe. Their golden lights contrasted the dark sky and warmed Lexi’s heart. …And, as she turned to Kalluto, his dark eyes twinkled in wonder. “?” His hand was taken in Lexi’s as she led him up the path.

Smaller fireflies were lain on the bridge in slumber. As they released snores, they emitted electrical fields the duo had to avoid. The walkway ended, so the two used flight and Moon Walk to land on giant leaves. Pairs of fireflies were linked via electric beams, floating up and down between the platforms. Once past this section, they landed near a car-size bug zapper near some sleeping bugs. Lexi used her bending to light up the zapper, causing the bugs to wake and light up. They floated at different heights and served as platforms to a higher level. Because they were baby fireflies, they wouldn’t electrify the kids.

A gentle gust of wind indicated they could fly on this route. Lexi carried Kalluto across the gust, calmly maneuvering around the peaceful fireflies. Even so, Kalluto didn’t feel much of a threat from the giant bugs. Even if they threatened to electrify him, they felt too relaxing to fear. After landing, the duo had to jump some adult fireflies that were flickering on and off, only jumping while they were off. They landed on a leaf beside a more giant bug zapper. The zapper would light up every 10 seconds, giving them that much time to climb around to other leaves. They carefully made their way up the zapper until they reached the roof. There were several baby fireflies asleep up here. Lexi walked into the center and released a brief, bright jut of electricity. The bugs startled awake and took flight, generating a gust of wind. Lexi carried Kal and flew alongside them.

It wasn’t often that Kalluto could lower his guard and put his trust in someone else. As he rested on Lexi’s back, he surveyed the thousands of lightning bugs, not to observe them like an enemy, but simply because he was enticed. He would almost say this was the most peaceful place in Aincrad. Although this shouldn’t matter to him… if anything, he would want more threatening enemies to train himself. He couldn’t just let his heart grow soft.

“Ahhh…let’s rest here for a bit.” Lexi said as she landed on a leaf.

“The stamina meter is pretty inconsistent.”

“Yeah, but like… I just wanna lie down for a bit.” She lay on her back and gazed at the flies. “They’re like a bunch of giant stars, aren’t they?”

“Laying here won’t help us find the boss any faster. We don’t even know if-”

“Kalluto, the boss isn’t going anywhere. Just lie down.”

“…Hm.” Kalluto lay beside her. The bobbing leaf felt nice under his virtual back.

“Wouldn’t have guessed you were an assassin. Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“It’s not exactly an occupation you make public.”

“True. But if you wanted me to go away, you could’ve said it to scare me.”

He turned his head away. Lexi noticed this and smirked. “Do you even like being an assassin?”

“Of course I do. The training might have been painful, but the occupation is fun.”

“But it’s nice to take a break from it, isn’t it? And have someone normal to hang out with?”

“You’ve proven that normal people are frustrating.”

“You like having me around.”

“Well, you have been an interesting study.”

“Yeah~. …Hey, when we get out of here, you wanna come over to my place sometime? You can have dinner with my family.”

“Why would you want that?”

“Just… thought I’d ask. If you wanted a break from your family… or something.”

“Since you clearly don’t have enough allowance, I suppose you have to repay me somehow.”

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes.’”

“Hm.” Kalluto faced up at the fireflies. “I don’t actually eat that much, anyway. I try to maintain a good diet so I can stay thin. It helps with the job.”

“And you dress like a girl because…?”

“What’s wrong with kimonos?”

“Nothing. I think it’s cute~”

“When are we gonna look for the boss?”

“Let the song cycle through one more loop.”

The kids lay in silence and let the fireflies entrance them, like flickering stars drifting to the sky. (End song.)

Battlestar Belt

Meanwhile, the stars of Floor 70 were fraught with war as the Irken player, Gaz Membrane fought her way through a fleet. Beyond the fleet was a seemingly vacant part of space, where a gigantic, rabbit-earred spaceship ominously rose from beneath. The “Here Comes Trouble” music accompanied its arrival, and a green-furred alien bunny was seen in the cockpit, wearing an emperor’s robe. “You made quite a mess of my armada, little missy! Allow me to introduce myself: I am Galactic Bunny, conqueror of the univoise!”

“This game has such weird bosses.”

“You ain’t the first one to challenge me today. I had me a little scuffle with some other green guy. He didn’t get the best o’ me, but he made off with my precious heart! Once I deal with you, I’m off to get dat heart back. And I will use its power to become emperor of the galaxy!”

“How nice. I’ll be stealing your throne now.”

After a rather one-sided battle, Gaz would be flying away from the ship as it erupted into a great explosion. She turned around to witness the blinding aftermath, shortly before Galactic Bunny’s severed head plopped onto her windshield. The head popped into fireworks and became a Boss Key. “These bosses really speak to me and I enjoy them.” Gaz smiled. “Alright… that’s three Boss Keys for me. …” She viewed across the distant space, where another battle was taking place. “I guess I should check on those guys. Though now that I think about it… where is that girl, anyway?” (Play “Area 6” from Star Fox!)

Stage 70: Battlestar Belt

Mission: Recover the Pure Heart from Hacker!

Mabel Pines was piloting her own H-Star that left a star-glittered streak from its engine. Dipper was manning a small control station above Mabel’s seat, shooting lasers at enemies, while Tronta and Vanellope were riding the ship’s wings. “You know, I thought the name ‘Shooting Star’ was familiar.” Tron commented. “That’s actually Nebula’s personal ship.”

“Copyright infringement not intended!” Mabel declared. “I am not liable!”

“There’s enough infringing in this game as it is~” Vanellope teased.

Mabel shot some ships that looked like TIE Fighters, having shields to their sides that Mabel had to shoot between. Star Gunners flew in from the sides to shoot the wing riders. Tronta tossed his Light Discs to K.O. the ones on his side while Vanellope took care of hers with a glitch-jump combo. A circle of TIE Fighters flew ahead of them, only briefly shooting lasers before turning sideways to defend from their attacks. Dipper saw an incoming mine and targeted it with a missile, launching once the mine was in the center of the TIEs. They exploded and rewarded them a bomb. The team flew toward a field of giant asteroids, Mabel first maneuvering right, then left. However, Star Ninjas pounced out of the craters and latched on the H-Star. Tron suffered a cut before knocking two ninjas off, but Vanel’s ninja suffered a Lickety Split Kick before taking the fall.

“Mabel, incoming!” Dipper yelled as meteors flew from ahead. His sister steered the ship as necessary to dodge them.

“Dipper, we got enemies coming from behind!” Tron alerted.

“Okay!” Dipper twisted the turrets around to shoot behind them. The two enemies were Mechapedes, centipede-like ships that shot fireballs from their segments. Dipper could destroy the individual segments, but mostly focused on the heads to destroy the ships completely. He then faced back ahead as they were flying to a cluster of small asteroids, deciding to launch the bomb and blow them all to pieces. They flew down and under a giant asteroid, making a curve to the upright as large Top Ships spun into being. They spun like actual tops, and Tronta whirled his discs like shields to defend the ship from their shots. It took several laser rounds to down the tops. Once past the asteroid, they flew over the surface of another asteroid. Topmen were on that surface, using springs to bounce up onto the roof.

Vanellope would kick down those Topmen while Tron dropped and zoomed along the asteroid, using his discs as boot wheels. He would stylishly slice the Topmen with light-bladed kicks, but had to perform leaps over electric bars and use the craters’ slopes as ramps. Turrets shot along the ground and tried to hit him, but Tronta was faster as he beheaded the turrets. He bounced some Spring Tops to get onto some ledges, ending at a group of three pillars with springs on them. Tron carefully landed and bounced these pillars as they returned him to the ship! As they were nearing a space station, four devices conjured a green barrier to block them. Enemy ships came from behind, so Dipper shot them while Vanellope zipped her way into one of the generators. She hacked the device and glitched it up, creating a gap for the ship to fly through.

“Boss! Another ship is breaching our defenses!” a robot named Delete’s voice was heard through the intercoms.

“Bah! Where do these brats keep coming from?!” Hacker shouted.

“Bhhhhhuuuuu…” Vanellope had to rest on the wing as her form sparked. “Th~is ga~me ha~s pretty str~ong co-o-o-o-ode…”

“Don’t overdo yourself, Vanel.” Carol cautioned. “I’m not sure if you could possess another Program in this game.”

Once past the barrier, a Shield Ranger began zooming around, a robot designed like a knight. It would swiftly dodge Dipper’s shots before flying up to land a cut, but Mabel steered right in evasion as Tron tossed a disc at its head. The ranger retreated, and Dipper landed enough shots to destroy it. Three large, armored ships suddenly spawned out of hyperspace and began to fire. As Mabel frantically dodged their lasers, golden lasers rained from above and destroyed the ships’ cockpits. “Hey, newbs! It’s a bit dangerous out here at the moment!” Mitch called, flying his H-Wing upside-down.

“Are you Sector Hinobi?” Tron asked. “We’ve been sent by Sector Q!”

“Sounds like you’re allies!” Zahra said, flying past. “We’re trying to breach that space station. The Pure Heart is in there!”

“They’ll never shoot down THIS ShootingStar!” Mabel declared, stomping the gas to boost over the cannon-loaded roof of a ship. Missiles launched out of said cannons, but her boost outran them as Zahra shot them afterward. Another ship flew in front of theirs and had giant hands attached. High Five’s hands blocked a hundred lasers from ahead, and when a group of ships tried to fly into him, he clapped the hands over each one to smash them.

“I can’t fit through there. Meet you later!” Five said before flying down. The H-Star flew toward an asteroid trench and twisted vertically to fit into the gap. Mabel maneuvered carefully until the trench exited to a wider area where ships rested in wait. They were taken by surprise as Dipper shot some down. A barrier activated at the end of the tunnel and was steadily moving toward them. Vanellope got on Tronta as the boy leapt to a walkway on the left. He raced on his discs, dodged around pillars, and sliced Star Ninjas that hid in wait. He jumped a ramp to go over some spikes and reached one of the barrier’s sliding generators. Vanellope went inside it, hacked the device, and shorted out that corner. They jumped back on the ship as it flew through, with Vanel needing another moment to rest.

They flew out of the tunnel and back into open space, shooting down a few Top Ships as a dreadnought station came into view. “Boss! They’re getting closer!” Buzz alerted.

“Why aren’t you shooting them, you damnable duncebuckets?!”

“Guys! I can use some help here!” Bergy shouted as the four could see him being chased by enemies. Dipper locked a missile onto the middle ship and fired, taking the other ones down with the explosion. “Thanks! I needed time for the shield to recharge.” He then flew toward a larger squadron and activated a shield, absorbing their lasers. Once in the center of the squadron, he unleashed an explosion to take them all down.

“There’s a landing platform!” Tron pointed. “Vanellope, let’s see if we can get in from there!”

“Right!” The two jumped off the H-Star and landed on a long, wide metal platform. Tron skated them across and jumped over shockwaves generated by Jump Beamers. The machines also served as springs, and one bounced Tron up to a Riddler Trophy. “You know, aren’t there also Cassette Tapes that unlock new soundtracks?” Vanellope asked.

“It doesn’t matter if people can just look the music up online.” Tron used a Jump Beamer to spring over a large gap, kicking down some Topmen that tried to knock them off a more narrow path. Once past the tops, Tron bounced some Spring Tops across some platforms and reached the base of the slanted Dreadnought. An electric barrier tried to impede them, but Vanel transferred her glitchiness to him to help zip over it. Large billiard balls were rolling down the slope, bouncing rampantly. Tron was hit by some of the balls and knocked back down, so Vanel zipped him back up before it could get worse. The slope ended as Tronta had to grind up a rail that snaked about the air, jumping Topmen that came from the opposite direction. The world glitched as the next rail segment warped above, but Vanel zipped them up in time.

The rail let off on a stable floor with three generators situated on tall platforms. A horde of Megatanks formed a maze of barriers to block them off. The duo searched for the nearest Megatank and destroyed it, then steadily picked down the other ones sequentially. They Wall Jumped to get onto the left pillar, bounced Topmen to reach the right pillar, and from there, Tron threw both discs toward the central platform for Vanellope to jump across. The candy girl hacked each generator and disabled the nearby barrier.

“Boss! Two of those brats are comin’ up from the lower entry!” Buzz alerted.

“Blast! You two, get up there and shoot down the gnats! I can deal with these two myself.”

The barrier opened to a very steep slope with holographic up and down conveyors, which would shift gravity in the duo’s favor. Tronta carried Vanel up a green ‘up’ path, but it suddenly tried to shift them down. Tron had to jump to a diagonal rail on the left and grind up it, jumping to the next ‘up’ path. Tron sliced down some turrets, but the road was about to cross to a ‘down’ slope, so Tron jumped to a rail—the game glitched as the rail transferred him downward, so he quickly jumped to another upright rail, followed by an upleft one. The ‘down’ path had changed to ‘up,’ and Tron could jump to it. He had to jump a “stairway” of small ‘up’ paths, each one immediately swapping to ‘down’ and requiring him to jump quickly. There were no platforms for the last wide jump, so Vanellope glitched them up. They landed in a wide hangar where the Grim Wreaker was parked. (End song.)

The other operatives were circling the top of the Dreadnought in their ships. The hangar was blocked by another barrier, so they were searching for and destroying generators. “You think those two will be fine on their own?” Dipper asked.

“They are top sector operatives, right?” Mabel shrugged. “They can at least get started until we-” They were shot from behind.

“Haha! Ahahahahaha!” Two sources of laughter sounded from a ship that looked like a giant doughnut with a rabbit’s head on top. Buzz’s cockpit was inside the doughnut hole and Delete’s was in the rabbit. “You ain’t screwin’ up the boss’s plans today!” Buzz declared.

“Wow, look, Dipper!” Mabel exclaimed. “A bunny doughnut! It looks so cute and tasty!”

“Focus, Mabel. That adorable pastry is trying to cream us!”

“Then bring on the sprinkles!” On her command, Dipper pressed a button to release a storm of tiny stars, dealing a large amount of damage in small quantities. Buzz and Delete dove downward and performed a U-turn to get behind the H-Star.

Tronta and Vanellope fought through some XANA Krabs to reach the Wreaker. The green-skinned villain’s visage displayed on a screen. “Since you meddlesome kids have come this far, perhaps you can be a test for my new weapon!”

“Hang on, I know that big-chinned creepo!” Vanellope said. “It’s Hacker! He’s a Brotherhood villain who attacks elementary school websites. He used to be a Program in this online math game where you had to solve a bunch of equations to beat him. He developed sentience and started trying to conquer Cyberspace.”

“How do you know him?”

“He attacked Gallagher’s website one time, so they got me to bust him. Problem is he was only programmed to know elementary-level math, so the best he could do was target those schools.”

“That’s THE Hacker, you candy-coated pest! And once we harness the power of Aincrad, I will upgrade my I.Q. one-hundredfold! Neither you nor that blasted Riddler will humiliate me again!”

“Oh, please, Hacky.” Riddler’s visage squeezed itself on the screen with him. “No upgrade you give yourself will ever measure up to my magnificence!”

“WHAT?! How did you find this channel?!”

“You may be a technical wizard, but I am a sage! Just wanted to remind your friends here that they are falling behind on their Riddle Collection, and they should get started posthaste when they are done wasting time with you.”

“Get out of here!” Hacker disconnected him. “Once I’m through with these twerps, you’re next! Activate the Digi Displacer!” (Play “Egg-Cerberus” from Sonic 2006!)

Boss fight: The Grim Wreaker

Two large antennae atop the Wreaker conjured a sky-blue energy sphere. The operatives jumped away when it launched at them, destroying a wide radius of code and leaving a clean cut, gaping hole. They ran separate directions as the ship shot rapid lasers at either. Vanellope saw some platforms on the ship’s right and planned to glitch up them once the lasers stopped. Once they did, Hacker began charging the Digi Displacer. Vanellope hurried up the platforms and hacked into the antennae: the code wall that awaited her appeared to be fraction addition. “Let’s see, ‘2/4 + 3(5/8 – 3/6) = ?’ They teach this in elementary school? Uh, CAROL?”

“I got my calculator handy!” Carol quickly inputted the equation. She passed the answer onto Vanel, allowing her to breach the code wall and attack the antennae.

The energy for the machine was sucked back into the Wreaker, electrifying The Hacker. “Nooooooooo!” Once it ceased, the math villain growled angrily and commanded his ship to lift off the ground. He tried to hover over Tronta and drop bombs over him, but he remained fast on his discs and outran their explosions. Tron raced to the wall so Hacker couldn’t follow, prompting him to drive his ship away. He fired a wide laser from the ship’s left cannon, but Tronta could grind up it. Hacker switched to the right laser as Tron flipped onto it, and he continued doing so despite Hacker alternating at a faster pace. Tronta smashed through one of the green windows, and Hacker drew twin pistols to shoot him. Tron pulled the discs back to his hands, dodging the shots and knocking the guns out of his hands with the discs. Once the discs returned, Tron flipped over to painfully bash them against Hacker’s chin.

The Pure Heart’s machine released an energy field that blasted Tronta out of the ship. The Wreaker flew away and charged another Digi Displacer. It quickly launched at Tron, who rolled away, the sphere destroying a smaller area of floor. It had enough energy to launch three more spheres, with the last one covering a wider area. Tron and Vanel stayed away from that zone, but the dark vessel began to release green shockwaves across the ground. At the same time, Hacker sent missiles that rained down in random areas, the duo having to dodge them while jumping the waves. Unfortunately, Tronta was electrocuted, and the blast of one of the missiles knocked him away.

Meanwhile, Vanellope was able to zip and kick off some missiles to reach the Wreaker’s roof. When Tronta was downed, Hacker began to charge the machine, so Vanellope hacked into it. Another math equation appeared before her. “‘Train A leaves Station A at 5:30 p.m., Train B leaves Station A at 5:33,’ come on, do we have to do one of these?”

Tronta pushed himself up and got ready to dodge. He waited expectantly for Vanellope to stop the device. “…!” Nothing was happening, and once the sphere grew to full size, it dropped to the ground. Almost the entire floor was swallowed by the Digi Displacer, save for a few tiny strips and platforms. Tronta had skied along the wall to avoid the blast. “Not sure why those parts survived, but I’ll take it! But where’s Vanellope…”

Tron zoomed around and down the side of the great crater. He leapt onto a small strip of ground and skated up, ducking Hacker’s bullets. He leapt some small platforms, but there was nowhere to go from there. Luckily, Hacker shot a large laser that he could grind across, then flip onto a rail hanging from the ceiling. He was about to jump some small platforms, but Hacker burned the laser along to melt them. Tronta simply jumped on and grinded that laser again, making it up to the ship’s windshield and smashing through! Tron kicked the villain’s chin and spun him around in a combo attack. One kick knocked Hacker’s wig off, and the other knocked him against the heart’s machine.

“Didn’t you learn your lesson, boy?! My anti-intruder field will send you flying!”

Tron braced himself as the machine was about to release the same force that blasted him off. “AAAAAHH!” But instead, The Hacker was blown off, Tron watching as he flew across the hangar and out the exit (the barrier seemed to have been disabled). Tron turned back to the machine as Vanellope jumped out.

“I reprogrammed it into an anti-Hacker thingy! I THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINK…” She immediately froze and vibrated in place.

Tronta used his discs to slice the machine and take the sky-blue heart inside it. “You did good, Vanellope! Why don’t we use this baby to get out of here?” (End song.)

Outside, the H-Star closed in on Buzz and Delete from the side, taking down the rabbit’s ears. “AAAAAH! My poor bunny’s ears!” Delete cried.

“Dede, they’re coming back! Drop the bomb now!”

“What? I can’t hear you!”

“Dang it, I told you not to connect those ears to your comms!”

“These robo-twins seem a little out-of-sync, Mabel!”

“Give them another taste of our Super Twin Missile, Dipper!”

Dipper gladly released the button and launched twin missiles. Delete panickingly sent a bomb backwards, but the missiles struck it before it could get far from the rabbit-doughnut. “AAAAAAHHH!” The henchbots went spiraling out of control.

The Hacker had fallen onto a lower ground on the Dreadnought. He looked up in panic as his henchmen’s ship was falling toward him, bolting out of the way. The ship crashed, the explosion blowing Hacker away. “YEAH!” The Pines Twins high-fived. “Haha, your hand is so tiny, Dipper~”

“As soon as this game’s fixed, I’m changing my-”

A powerful beam struck the engine of their ship. “WAAAAAHH!” They began spiraling down toward the same ground Hacker was on.

“I’ll save them!” Five flew down.

“Who shot…!” Zahra stopped herself, her eyes filling with dread. “INFINITE!”

The black-and-silver jackal was floating in the middle of space, highlighted by his red aura. Five tried to grab the H-Star in his hands, but the vessel had already exploded. As he stared over the wreckage in horror, he saw the Pines limping out of the smoke, their HP reduced to 10. Five sighed in relief.

Infinite set his sights on the Wreaker flying out of the hangar. The jackal flew like a comet and blasted into the cockpit. “INFINITE?!” Tron screamed. “AAH!” He and Vanel were pushed back by his force, dropping the heart.

“I’ll be taking this if you don’t mind.” Infinite calmly took the heart in hand.

“Give it back, you jerk!” Vanellope recovered and zipped around to confuse him.

“No, Vanellope!” Tron yelled. The candy girl dealt a Lickety-Split Kick, but her form froze and glitched as soon as her boot met the heart. Infinite was about to attack her, but… Vanellope’s pixels seemed to shatter. “VANELLOPE!”

…

“AAAH!” Carol screamed.

“What’s wrong, Carol?!” Pacifica yelled, rushing in.

“V-Vanellope…” Carol’s screen was horribly staticky. Vanellope’s HP bar was the only thing she could make out, but it was extremely erratic as the bar kept flickering to different sizes.

“Is Vanellope… destroyed?”

“I…I don’t know. I’m not sure… what’s happening.”

…

Tronta attacked Infinite out of anger, but found himself glitched under his power and forced back. “That was disappointing. Now, I need to check on something.” Infinite abandoned Tron and flew out of the ship, dropping straight down. The Pumparian growled and leapt out of the ship after him.

Infinite landed near Hacker, the villain recovering from the explosion. “Hacker! Is the Pure Heart adaptable?”

“If my calculations are correct, give it a spin!”

Infinite pressed the heart to his DNEgg and felt a surge of power. “Raaaaahh… yes! I can feel it! Now, I have a chance at seizing the MCP’s power completely!”

“What’s he doing to the heart?!” Mitch yelled, blasting gold lasers at Infinite. The beams were easily repelled as one of Mitch’s wings were destroyed.

“Ah hahahahaha! I hacked the Pure Heart to be adaptable to Infinite’s gem!” Hacker cackled. “You rats will never defeat him!”

“Don’t you know, Hacky?” Mabel yelled, still hunched due to her weakened HP. “We’re masters of defeating people!”

“We’ll see about that!” Infinite mustered a sphere and launched it at the Pines—but it was intercepted by a missile. “?!” The jackal whipped up at the ship responsible.

It belonged to the scowling Irken lady. “You know, the final boss ain’t supposed to attack the players ahead of time!”

“Gaz!” Five exclaimed.

“Gaz? One of the top players?” Infinite shot up to punch her ship, but Gaz expertly maneuvered away, twisting her ship to shoot him. Infinite glitched the lasers away, but was shot in the spine by Mitch’s gold laser.

“Mabel, I think we should call Miko’s group.” Dipper said as they watched the battle.

“Yeah, let’s do it.”

However, as Mabel began to bring up the Friend Codes, The Hacker was stealthily retrieving a shotgun from the wreckage of his henchbots’ ship. Tron gasped, seeing him lock the gun on the Pines as he fell. “HEY!” He tossed the disc directly down.

The disc curved and sliced The Hacker’s head… just before he pulled the trigger. The laser flew and pierced Mabel’s chest. Dipper gaped in horror as her HP dropped to zero. His older twin wobbled before falling, Dipper raising his arms to suspend her.

“Uh…ow… Dipper…I…”

The particles of her body scattered like stardust. Dipper was left struck speechless.

Mystery Shack

An explosion shook the shack. Mabel’s bed was ruined… and so was her head. Candy, Grenda, and Gideon were utterly horrified. “M…Mabel?” Gideon choked.

“She’s… dead?” Candy gasped.

“What the hell is going on up here?!” Grunkle Stan yelled as he rushed in. “Eh…huh?” His grumpy face fell upon seeing his great-niece’s head black and lifeless. “Mabel…”

…

Pacifica received a call, Carol glancing to her as she answered. “Hello? Hey, Candy. What’s… WHAT?!”

“What’s wrong?!”

“Mabel is… dead!”

Carol choked on her breath, unsure how to respond. “Her helmet blew up and…and killed her.”

“Does that mean…” Carol faced her screen again. “She… and Vanel…”

…

“RAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!” Dipper’s rage was uncontrollable, but since Hacker’s body had already derezzed, he directed his anger at Infinite. “YOU MONSTER! YOU KILLED MY SISTER!”

Gaz grit her teeth and extracted eight lasers, blasting the villain, but he simply endured them. “I don’t have time to waste with you fools, anymore! I need to prepare myself against her…” Infinite vanished in a flash of pixels.

Tron had thrown his extra disc beneath him to bounce and break his fall. The operatives were sympathetic as they faced Dipper.

Cutie Park

Sectors Q and SA were flabbergasted after Miko revealed what she just learned. Neither group had any desire to discuss their recent exploits after hearing that. “So, you…you’re one of the Pure Hearts?” Carmine asked. “You’re a part… of Boly?”

“Affirmative.” Boly confirmed. “You needn’t be concerned. As mine and Miko’s friends, I am very eager to spend more time with you!”

“H-Hang on a sec!” Miko stated. “I…I don’t wanna become a ‘perfect being’!”

“But it shall benefit you greatly. There is nothing to fear.”

“But I…I like the way I am.”

“I really didn’t expect this.” Index said. “As soon as this incident started, I had a feeling Miko would meet the Matter Newborn, but…”

“Huh? Matter Newborn?” Jenny cocked a brow.

“I mean, it would seem obvious Boly is the Matter Newborn. Didn’t you guys guess that? I’m sure Quill told you.”

“Huh?” Miko raised a brow herself as she looked down at her short leader. “Told us what?”

Quill grit his teeth and nervously fiddled his fingers. “You didn’t tell them?” Index asked. “At the meeting, I gave you the Spirit Ball to give to Miko, saying she might be-”

“Fine, I didn’t tell them! I…I didn’t want a Firstborn Guardian in our sector! That would mean we’d have a big responsibility and…”

As soon as Miko processed their words, her mouth dropped. “ME?! I’M A FIRSTBORN GUARDIAN?!”

“WHAT?!” Eddy popped out of Carmine’s pocket. “You dick, what else aren’t you telling us?!”

“Why is there a talking dolly in your belly?!” Millium exclaimed.

“I still don’t know who some of you people are!”

“Everybody just shut up!” Kazma shouted. “I…I can’t keep up with this! What the hell is a Firstborn Guardian?!”

“I…” Miko stared at the holographic diamond above her glove. “I guess it means… Boly and I really are connected.”

“As it has been established. Once we are reconnected, Miko, all will be made clear. You will understand and accept.”

“But… what does that mean? Will I even… still be the same person?”

“Our ‘hearts’ will merge as one and become an upgraded person.”

“Will you stop saying that?! You don’t know how I’m feeling!”

“But I do. You are confused and afraid. Your ‘heart’ has developed these feelings as you have grown proud of yourself. It is these very feelings that will make us complete.”

“I don’t really know what will happen myself.” Index said. “But she has to become the Guardian somehow. Or maybe… there’s a different Guardian altogether? I’m not sure…”

Her expression downtrodden, Miko walked away from her friends. “I…I don’t know if I wanna be a Guardian either.”

The friends shared sympathetic looks, wondering how to comfort her. But the silence was broken by the call of Miko’s Friend Code. High Five appeared. “Miko, I have some bad news. Two of the operatives you sent to help us… Mabel and Vanellope… they’re dead.”

The group froze pale. “V…Vanellope? Mabel?”

“They were killed by Infinite and one of his henchmen. And then… Infinite took the Pure Heart. It sounds like he learned how to use its power. Is everything… okay up there?”

“…I’ll call you back.” Miko hung up. Her teammates couldn’t think of what to say or do next.

“I would advise we terminate Infinite immediately.” Boly said. “I sense one other Pure Heart on Floor 100. Miko… it will be okay.”

“…” Miko narrowed her eyes and faced the sky. “Then let’s get to it.”

Code Room

“So, Hacker has helped you harness the heart’s chi? Excellent!” Eggman smirked.

“But XANA has told me of something imperative! The one who’s carrying the MCP, that Miko girl… Apparently, she is a part of the MCP! She’s one of the Pure Hearts!”

“What?!”

“They plan to form into a perfect being once the hearts are reunited! If that is the case… perhaps she is the secret to-”

“No. Infinite… I want you to destroy that girl.”

“Destroy her?”

“She is a KND operative… and I am positive the MCP is a Firstborn. Their connection can be nothing but bad news. It isn’t about harnessing the Firstborn’s power, it’s about stopping the KND from becoming more powerful! I’ve already sent robots to Sector Q. I will destroy Miko’s physical body, but you make sure to do the same on your end. It may not destroy the MCP completely, but it should greatly hinder it.”

“I see… Yes, you’re right. I won’t let Hinobi’s plans succeed. With Aincrad or this Firstborn… their organization will fall!”

“Yes. This should leave a grave wound on Disney’s name as well, along with the KND. Still, this heart could serve to revitalize your Matter Chi and sustain your body.”

“Indeed… this has been a fruitful opportunity, Doctor. And once I’m finished in Aincrad, I will repay my debt to you. The Eggman Empire will rule!”

Chapter Text

I just looked up that Kayaba’s canon age is 28. I’m gonna age him up by 15 years because that’s a little too young to set his plans in motion.

Both teams returned to the Elevator Tower, with Miko bravely leading the charge. “So, what was your name again?” Goombella asked Kazma.

“Kazma.”

“I sort of feel like I’ve seen you before.”

“Really? I don’t remember you.”