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There are so many people here. There are so many people and Mizuki would like to die.
Maybe asking their sister what to wear to the school dance was a mistake. They bought a dress, to the slight confusion of their parents. They thought it might be nice to try out, but it’s hot in here and sweat sticks to their back and yet they wear a grey hoodie over everything because they need to cover themself up somehow. The seams feel so itchy on their sides just by sensing the stares of other students boring holes into their body, branding their judgement in their skin. They pull the hoodie tighter around their shoulders.
It’s mostly third years in attendance, but they’d come as well because ‘it’ll be a fun time’ and ‘maybe you can make some new friends.’ Mizuki scoffs and takes a sip out of the cup of water they’d grabbed from the other side of the room. Their parents had no idea what they were asking of them.
They really, really are not having a great time right now. There are approximately two other second years at the dance who are nowhere to be seen; though it’s not like they’d want to talk anyway. Mizuki contemplated calling their parents and asking to pick them up early, but then they’d ask questions that they’re not quite ready to answer. Furthermore, they don’t know any third years, who are making up most of the party. Well, they know one.
And of course he showed up. For some reason. There’s a high chance it’s the same one Mizuki has. “Oh, what a coincidence!” Rui suddenly pops up beside them, and they nearly jump out of their skin. He smiles. “Sorry, did I scare you?”
“No, it’s fine,” they regain their composure and start examining his outfit. He brushed his hair, for once, and it’s not in that dorky braid he always wears. Since the beginning of the year, it’s grown past his shoulders and falls perfectly straight. Mizuki can’t help but feel envious, their own hair barely going past their ears. He doesn’t seem concerned with dressing all that formally, considering his untucked white shirt and too-long uniform pants. Mizuki bites into their cup to fight back a smile. “What are you doing here, anyway?”
He frowns. “Not even a greeting? Do you dislike me that much?” He pokes their arm and they roll their eyes.
They feign indifference, because the truth is, they’re really happy to see him. They’re glad he also showed up to another school event that neither of them want to be at, that they can confide in each other like they’ve gotten so used to doing, that just his presence can make them feel less alone.
“Answer the question already.” They lightly kick his ankles in response.
“You looked lonely, I guess,” he says simply and shrugs. “Thought I might keep you company.”
“…What about you?” They cover their face further with the cup. “Do you know anyone here? I dunno about you, but I feel really out of place in here.” They do know. It’s the one thing that’s making up their friendship, that’s making them skip class to stare through the fencing on the rooftop together in silence.
His expression turns solemn. “That makes two of us,” his voice is a pitch lower, and he looks down, hands in his pockets. Mizuki shoves the now empty cup into their face, eyes only seeing white and the faint dark outlines of their fingers. “Want me to get you another drink?”
“What do they even have?” Mizuki responds, not moving the cup.
“I don’t know. Maybe lemonade, or something.” They feel him slip off the wall. “Here, you should come with me.”
Mizuki finally looks up, and he’s standing in front of them, hand outstretched. Mizuki thinks they’re supposed to take it, but they can’t bring themself to. They shrug at him. “I’d rather not have people staring at me.”
“Ah… for the outfit? Don’t worry about it, I stand out too, you know?” He smiles a little. “I think you look good. Did you pick it out yourself?”
Mizuki feels themself flush at the compliment. It’s a little different hearing someone other than their overly excited sister comment on it. “No, I got help from someone else.”
“I see.” He nods in acknowledgment. “Are you sure you don’t want some cake or anything?” He asks again. Mizuki stares at him, trying to process his expression. His smile is soft, and everything about the way he looks at them is genuine. They feel something churn in their stomach. They hate it. They’ve gotten close, they realize. No one’s ever had a reason to care for them before. What right did Rui have to do so now — Mizuki, of all people, should know that he’s the same.
But standing here right now, staring at their friend a little too long, wanting to disappear into the floor while random people they don’t know laugh and dance, they decide that anything would be better than this, and that hanging out with another loner would at least cheer them up a little. It’s worked out for them thus far, why not keep going?
“Okay,” they say, finally, with a smile, grabbing Rui’s hand. “We’re gonna get you more food too, okay? You gotta eat more, Rui. You’re way too skinny for your age.” Without another word, they toss their cup over their shoulder and start pulling Rui through the crowd to the tables in the other room.
“Mizuki, wait-“ he stumbles, one hand reaching up to keep his tie in place. Mizuki laughs and glances back at him. His hair is getting messed up, and his eyes are wide, but they’re filled with more mirth than when they first met him on the rooftop. He laughs back.
Yeah, they decide. This is better.