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My poker face was obvious from the other side of the village. The commotion that everyone is doing outside just for the sake of ‘creating’ ramen in the stone age is amazing and rather annoying, I haven’t been able to draw anything that weren’t doodles for the past weeks, I’ve never had so much in my mind before and I am willing to give up at any second if it wasn’t for the constant bickering that Senku and Kohaku did so I could continue.
But there’s nothing. How can my mind be so full, and yet nothing makes my hand move?
I let the pencil aside and stared at the large paper in front of me, all while letting out a deep sigh. They had the trouble to do all of these materials just for me to have a block when we least need it, I’m pathetic. My writer skills are decent, so for now I am re-writing an old story of love and tragedy, although, the bad thing about this is that I don’t remember the name of the book. “(Y/N)? Shouldn’t you be painting?” Kohaku asked as she stepped closer to me. I nodded slowly and let the pages of the book aside. “Yep, but it’s impossible with so much noise. And my head is a mess at the moment, it’s like all my thoughts are tangled.” I turned to the blonde and found her worried expression to be appreciated on my behalf.
“I came out here to see if air cleans my mind, but nothing in me wants to cooperate. What a pity.” I crossed my arms and twitched an eye when even the slightest glance at the doodles made me angry. “Do you know why you are like this? It’s not normal to find you so stressed.” I stood and stretched as my eyes found Kohaku’s. “I do know why I’m like this. I happen to be in denial.” She froze when I said that, making me raise an eyebrow.
I am in denial of my feelings, and I ignore them daily since they came to be. I have never experienced something like this, I might have been 17 when all of this stone thing happened, but I was so centered on my studies and future I didn’t have any time for love… That, and because no one was on my radar. However, Ishigami Senku happened, and although it’s been a long time since I’ve met him, I began feeling fuzzy around him for a few weeks now. It’s unrequited without even having to confess, as every single girl that flirts and tries to gain his attention gets heartbroken. I can see the shattered pieces of their hearts on the ground.
He even divorced Ruri at the minute of being married, who even does that?? To a beauty like her which is even worse!
“So, you finally admit it. You like Senku.” I averted my eyes and broke my trance to shy away from Kohaku’s grin. “Am I actually THAT obvious?!” I didn’t mean to shout but it escaped me, making me and Kohaku panic a little. Well, nobody heard us so we relaxed. “Not that obvious, you know. But your stares are full of longing.”
“I believe it’s impossible for the others not to notice if my ‘longing’ is that annoying. I’m pretty sure Gen knows about it too, he’s the mentalist after all.” It would be bad if he didn’t notice, but the fact that someone as sneaky as Gen knows that much about my feelings makes me want to cry rivers. I wish to be petrified again. “Come on, (Y/N). Why don’t you come and help us with the ramen? You need to relax, for real this time.” I sighed and followed Kohaku back to the village, she helped me to bring back the materials to my hut and we spent the day being vigilant of the village not trying to eat the ramen, specially Ginro.
The space ramen was converted to cup noodles the next day, thanks to another machinery that they managed to build. Chrome was the first to try it simply because he was too impatient. To my surprise, Senku gave me the second cup of noodles, and I took it as I glared at Kohaku and Gen, both of them smirking from their positions. Not even 5 minutes later, the entire village was eating noodles. “Not one millimeter of concern there. Taiju and Yuzuriha. Those two aren’t the type to kick the bucket that easily.” We heard a noise coming from a hut near us, many of the village people walked near to it to hear Lillian Weinberg. Senku’s father created a glass record before dying, and everyone was enchanted by the woman’s voice, while no one is looking, I turned around and walked back to the village after leaving the empty cup on a table.
I glanced at Senku when he stared at the sky with a smile. His true passion is science, and it’s not a bad thing, it’s because of his dream that I admire him so much. “I don’t want anyone to get hurt.” We heard Ruri mutter, Senku and I turned to her immediately. “There’s no avoiding this fight anymore, is there?”
“We’re not going to try and kill anyone. The victory conditions for our Kingdom of Science are surprisingly simple: The capture of the miracle cave, to gather the components for revival fluid. If we can get in touch with my friends over there, with our cell phones, we might even be able to dismantle the Tsukasa Empire without bloodshed.” Explained Senku as everyone listened. “Taiju and Yuzuriha have been infiltrating Tsukasa’s army this whole time. For the little time I’ve spent with them, I know for a fact that we don’t have to worry.” I said, receiving a smile from Senku before looking away.
I came to a halt in front of the village’s bridge, staring into nothingness as I felt a pain in my chest I couldn’t calm down. It wasn’t enough to die, but a tear ran down my cheek, and then another, and another, and soon I couldn’t stop them. I didn’t sob, and I kept my empty expression as my hair danced with the wind. “I’m pathetic…” I muttered to myself.
“Why are you bringing yourself down when a pretty girl such as yourself should be smiling all the time??” I turned to find Gen walking towards me. I didn’t bother to hide the fact that I was crying, it wouldn’t matter anyway. He already knows by how he looked when Senku gave me the noodles. “This is so cliche… And yet, I can’t help but feel hurt over something that hasn’t happened… How am I not pathetic?”
“Mmm. You say you see Senku as a friend, yet your heart says otherwise. I wonder– Would it be honest to tell you that mayyybeee you are pathetic.” I elbowed him as I snickered, receiving a smirk from the mentalist. “So mean! You said it yourself!” I wiped my cheeks and sighed deeply before turning to Gen. “Nope, that won’t do, let me clean that.” I rolled my eyes and let him clean my cheeks with his overcoat. I decided against thanking him, knowing he wouldn’t let this go even if I beg, I blinked and stared at Gen as he smirked at me, well, I thought he was smirking at me until I heard a cough. I froze on the spot and turned to find Senku, Kohaku and Chrome looking at us with widened eyes.
I swear to all the gods in existence I am going to petrify myself. Gen did this is ON PURPOSE!
“(Y-Y/N), do you mind coming with me to find more wood. NOW.” Gee, how can I say no to Kohaku when she looks like a damned gorilla when she’s angry? The look of shock was quick to vanish from Senku’s expression, I’m willing to call it my imagination playing tricks on me. Maybe he dislikes the thought of people doing PDA?
He’s not dumb, I’m sure he already noticed that I avoid him, after all, we used to find each other back at his hut and later the observatory to speak about science and history. It’s sad really, the only way of forgetting this feeling is to prevent myself from looking at Senku, at least for now. I just need time.
That afternoon I came back from the woods with a limping leg and an annoying Kohaku, and once again I was closed in my hut waiting for the blonde to bring bandages. Nothing too severe, in 2 days I’ll be fine, but it will be the longest 2 days of my life. I am staring at my doodles with a pain in my chest.
I remember my father telling me to draw what I most desired, what I’m feeling at the moment, or my everyday sights from when I used to hang out with friends and family. I forced myself to stand and grabbed the pencil, I sat in front of a pile of large papers and began drawing the faces of my family, we were all reunited in Christmas of that year, then I drew the beauty of the world that disappeared a long time, the pain that I was suffering over keeping quiet, and an illustration of the village’s chief, Senku.
I smiled sadly. Well… I can easily say that we need to save the faces of our heroes, just like many kings and emperors did in their day. In the end, I am overjoyed that I finally got to draw something.
“Huh, I don’t look half bad.” I jumped on my seat and turned to look at Senku with a surprised face. “How– How long have you been here?”
“Enough to know that you’re feeling dramatic.” I followed his sight of vision and slapped myself mentally. The drawing of my pain is put so exclusively that that would be the first drawing everyone sees when walking in. “I’m sorry, Senku. I would be redrawing every famous painting in history if it wasn’t for my…” I stopped, and Senku raised his eyebrow when I pursed my lips. “Sorry.” I muttered. “I don’t want to bore you with this. Let’s just say I’m going through a small depression at the moment… Did you come here for something? Seeing you so silent worries me.” I say to Senku, who was focused on the painting of him.
“Why did you draw me?” He asked, catching me off guard.
This is a losing game. There’s no way I’m going to act more than I am now.
I suddenly felt nervous. “A-And why not? You’re the village’s chief and the one that’ll bring technology back, besides, I’m pretty sure the girls will most likely stare at it and leave you alone with your science. Isn’t it the best idea I’ve gotten yet?” We chuckled, and I knew that he agreed with me. I felt my cheeks getting warmer, a stupid smile decorating my face.
Yeah, it was most definitely a good idea to distract people from Senku.
Senku didn’t say anything and found him staring at my leg. I opened my mouth to speak, but Kohaku stepped in and looked at me and then at Senku. “Oh, did I interrupt something?” She asked, a cute smile appearing on her face. She turned to the drawing in front of the door and yelled a little before I calmed her down. Senku was still here, his silence bringing a sudden discomfort in the hut, Kohaku’s grin didn’t disappear as she bandaged my leg and put ice on it. I sighed at the comfort of my muscle relaxing. “You said you wanted me to give something to the mentalist?” I nodded at Kohaku and gave her a box with professional crayons that Chrome and Senku had given me. “Do tell him to use them lightly, I’m not in a mood to lose my things.” The blonde nodded and winked before walking out.
I don’t know what to say next, Senku worries for his friends but he’s horrible with emotions too. He isn’t leaving, why isn’t he leaving? Isn’t it obvious that the conversation is over? Why is he still here?
“You’re not pathetic.” I widened my eyes and stared at the drawing of him on the table. He… He heard the conversation…?
My heart beat faster in my chest, and I let go of the pencil as tears formed rapidly, I clenched my fists and closed my eyes, sucking back down my emotions. The silence was awkward. He is Senku Ishigami, he would’ve known about it sooner or later, I knew I should have closed myself in here without accepting visitors. I’m so pathetic. “I don’t need this…” I started, avoiding his eyes. “I… I-I know what you think about the whole love and affection crap. I’ve seen and heard it multiple times and I respect you no matter what… So please, leave. We have too many things to work on…” With no word, I heard him walk out.
Finally, I was alone to cry with an empty expression. Minutes went by quickly and I put away his drawing and cleaned the hut before stepping out, it was already night and no one is around. The night sky is beautiful.
I almost stumbled over a case left in front of my shed, and I took it to inspect it closely before opening it. I averted my eyes and gasped slightly, taking a bottle that contained a corrosive, colorless liquid. Is this…
“Propenoic acid, an organic compound and the simplest unsaturated carboxylic acid. An acrylic that can be applied in thin layers or washes to create effects that resemble watercolors.” I watched Senku a few feet away from me, a smile on his lips. “You… Got me acrylic acid…?” I asked, still not over the fact that I treated him like trash and he just decides to give me a gift. Wait, is this really a gift? I was about to ask why but I pursed my lips, it was only to revive the full history of Arts. “Thank you… Senku…” I muttered.
“What was that, (Y/N)?” Senku walked closer to me and rested his hand on his hips. “I… I said thank you.” I said, staring at each other for a few moments until I glanced away. He had his smug smirk. “With this much, I believe you also want me to store it because of the consequences it can give humans.”
“Ten billion points for you! Swallowing can result in severe gastrointestinal irritation or ulceration and burns of the mouth and throat. If everything goes south, we can use it to burn them, this is exhilarating!” His expressions sometimes scare the soul out of me. There’s also a pair of gloves in the case, making me smile involuntarily. “I’m sorry, for everything I said… In the end, I was afraid I ruined our friendship…” I apologized.
Senku pointed to the case. “There’s a letter inside." I raised an eyebrow and gazed at it to grab the paper. My eyes couldn’t believe what I read, and when I looked back at Senku, he was walking away with his ears red and an arm raised, as to say goodnight.
My cheeks burned, and my heart didn’t stop pounding out of happiness.
'C8H11NO2 + C10H12N2O + C43H66N12O12S2
I waited for you, wait for me.’