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Laura kicked a rock across the sidewalk as she walked to school with her neighbors, Lola and LaFontaine, who spoke in depth about their shared excitement for their Acadeca season. She tried to be interested but the subjects flew over her head. Her phone buzzed incessantly in her pocket as her team’s group chat got inundated with updates from their team captain.
“What’s she saying now?” LaFontaine asked as their friend scrolled through the chat.
“We’re having our meeting today on the mentorship program.”
“I never understood why you all do that.”
“It’s fun and gives the new players someone to chat with,” she explained.
“So, what’s it like dating team captain?”
“Like nothing’s changed.”
“Oh, we never got an update on how you did during club season,” Lola inquired.
“We did well. My team finished fourth in our bracket and Danny’s group finished first again.”
“Really?”
“Well, they’re in a lower bracket than us, so… yeah. Still impressive, though. Um, where are your guys’ classes?”
Lola pulled out her class schedule, “I’ve got Borosk in D2.”
“Yeah, I’m with Alvintzi,” LaFontaine informed them.
“I’ve got Helbig, so we aren’t too far apart.” Laura checked her phone again. “Where do we want to meet for lunch, same spot?”
“That works for me,” Lola nodded.
“Cool, I should go, I gotta get to the meeting, so I’ll see you guys at lunch,” she promised on her way to C3.
She passed the school’s sign ‘Silas High School, Home of the Knights’ where fresh-faced 9th graders took pictures while their distracted teachers sped walked to their classrooms or gossiped with their peers before the first bell rang. She finally arrived at the athletic meeting room where Danny stood before the veteran water polo players who opted in for the mentorship program. Laura went up to her while everyone chatted about their summer break.
“Hey,” she greeted with a brief peck on her cheek.
Danny smiled, “Hey. We’re gonna get started.” She brushed her thumb against her girlfriend’s cheek and sorted out her paperwork. “Alright, let’s get settled. As you know, we have our Knights and Squires sorted out. Thank you for participating this year. We have a few new players on the varsity squad, so they’re included in this as well. Don’t be surprised if you get an upperclassman. Just a reminder, your Squire is not a servant, they are there to learn about our team and the rules of the game if they’ve never played. If I see or hear about any hazing, you are immediately reported to Coach Griffith. I do not want a repeat of my freshman year.” Danny took a stack of papers out of her folder. “With that out of the way, let’s get started.” She began reciting the names of the upperclassmen and paired them with their Squire, handing them a paper that detailed the new player’s interests and experience level. Laura’s ears perked up at her name. “Laura, you have Carmilla Karnstein.”
She took the paper and began looking over it. Listed in her Squire’s interests were a variety of metal and hard rock bands. According to her history, Carmilla played for Cresens her first two years. They had a strong team from her recollection, so it was surprising to have her here. Once everyone had received their mentees, Danny approached her and lovingly draped her arms over her waist.
“So, what are your thoughts on Karnstein?” she asked. “She’s one of our older ones.”
“Yeah, kinda weird being the same age, but it’ll work.”
“That’ll be nice to be out of the freshman drama.”
Laura shrugged in agreement. “True. You know I guess it makes sense that she’s a metalhead,” she referenced to the sheet, “but I don’t know if we’ll have much in common besides water polo.”
“You don’t have to hang out.”
“We did?”
“Well, yeah, but that’s a little different,” Danny chuckled. “Give it a chance and don’t be offended if you guys only end up hanging out at practice, that’s how it was with my mentor.”
Laura nodded and placed the paper in her backpack as the bell rang. She took her partner’s hand as they walked to class. They parted with a chaste peck and Laura looked around the room for a place to sit. She recognized one of the students from a group project the previous year, so sat beside her.
“Hey, Grace,” she waved.
“How’s it going? What’d you do this summer?”
“Play polo,” she laughed. “What about you?”
“I took some summer classes so now I don’t have to take modern world history. I’ve got a free block.”
“Lucky, I wish I had time for that.”
“How often do you practice?”
“Only four times a week but I also worked at the cafe by my place.”
As the warning bell rang, a few more stragglers entered including Carmilla herself. She sat across the room by the window to seclude herself from the rest of the class. Laura almost wanted to move over so she wasn’t alone, but considering how she had been during their practices before school started, she decided against it.
“Is that Carmilla?” Grace asked.
“Yeah, how do you know her?”
“She’s the principal’s kid, well one of them.”
“Who are her siblings?”
“I think she lives with Will Luce, that Italian kid, and Matska Belmonde.”
Laura nodded at the information and watched her closely. She wanted to figure out how to break down her defenses no matter how weird it felt to be focusing on her. Helbig went over some simple lessons and the syllabus before finally releasing them a little before the bell where Carmilla made sure to be the first one out. Laura waited for the masses to move so she could get to Danny as they walked to their second block.
“Hey, so how do you like Helbig?”
“She’s nice so far.”
“Yeah, I always enjoyed her class. You’ll love her projects, they’re pretty easy and she gives you a ton of time and freedom to research.”
“Good, hey, so Carmilla’s in my class. Did you know her mom’s the principal?”
“Yes, I think I remember seeing her sister pick her up, you know Matska?”
“Yeah.”
“She has that grey-blue Audi.”
“Ah,” Laura nodded.
“Hey, we’re going to your place after practice, right?”
“Yeah, my dad’s having a Doctor Who marathon with LaF and their parents, so it’ll be pretty empty unless you wanna check it out?”
“You’ve got me hooked, we gotta go!” she accepted with a playful peck on the cheek. Danny pulled away from her before quickly saying from the doorframe, “Okay, I’ll see you in a bit.”
Laura nodded and continued down the hall to her second block. She didn’t mind the introductions but still couldn’t wait for lunch to hear what her friends got to do. She didn’t have any other classes with Carmilla but that didn’t stop her from thinking about how odd she acted or reserved she was. Laura felt concerned about scaring her off with their polar opposite personalities so she hoped to talk with Danny again. Once her next class ended, she rushed out to the quad to stake a spot for them by the art buildings where LaFontaine was already sitting with their meal as they glossed over their syllabi.
“Hey,” she waved at them.
They nodded at her and put away the papers. “I hate intros.”
“Oh, why?”
“The whole enby thing, some people get weird. My teachers are cool about it but a lot of people still read me as a girl which I’m not offended by but it’s not all of me.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
LaFontaine shrugged it off. “Eh, people will get used to it and maybe I can scare them off with something cool.” They pulled out some of their rough sketches. “Like this.”
Laura took the paper and laughed, “What is this?”
“It was going to be a cool pipetter but I bet I could change it up.”
Danny arrived at their spot with Lola. “We have Math together!”
“Yes, but Mr. Raold talks very quietly,” Lola complained while imitating his tone.
“That’s gonna be annoying,” LaFontaine agreed.
“Yeah, I might have to sit up front so I don’t fall asleep.”
Danny nodded along and then added, “But he did promise to let us work on homework for the second half of class.”
“Yes, I’m happy about that. I’ve heard good things about him, so yeah…”
“Do you think he makes ASMR videos on the side?” Laura chuckled as her girlfriend sat next to her.
“Maybe. He’d make a lot of money.”
“Oh, Danny,” LaFontaine called out to her, “How was Germany?”
“Cramped but fun,” she responded. “I slept in my cousin’s bunk and kept hitting my head. I think they did that on purpose. Actually, I’m sure they did. We did go to a few botanical gardens.”
“Which ones? Were there any carnivorous or - like - toxic plants?”
“Yes, actually. There was this tropical one they had in a greenhouse… I can’t remember the name but it had these cute yellow flowers with points. I kind of wanted to touch it.”
“I would have.”
Lola commented. “I’m sure.”
“It would have been cool.”
“Anyway,” she segued into another topic that Laura tuned out of as she ate and people-watched.
Laura glanced at the quad until her eyes landed on Carmilla by the large oak tree sitting on a lunch table with her sister and her friends. She glanced at Matska on the phone getting increasingly upset until she visibly rolled her eyes along with her head and ended the call. She went on to take her sister’s phone and pocket it which annoyed Carmilla enough to retaliate with a hard smack on the shoulder. When she didn’t get the device back, she continued to talk with the upperclassmen. After the scene grew boring, she tuned back into her friends and slouched against Danny’s shoulder.
“Oh, LaF roped me into the Doctor Who marathon,” Lola sighed.
LaFontaine was quick to defend the show, “Come on, it’ll be fun. Besides, we mostly just watch reruns of Four.”
“He’s the scarf one, right?”
“Yeah.”
“I wish we watched more Tennant,” Laura offered.
“The old guard chooses,” they ominously explained.
The bell rang and they dispersed slowly to their last two periods that dragged on until Laura was finally released to practice. She quickly grabbed her stuff and rushed to the locker room, squeezing past the underclassmen with the unfortunate fate of having PE as their last class. She quickly changed into her suit while the other athletes slowly filled the room, chatter echoing off of the high ceilings until they filed out to the fields and pool deck. She quickly got to work on setting up the course with her teammates, too focused on the various tasks to really participate in gossip.
Coach Griffith strolled onto the pool deck with a coffee in his hand and his bag hanging off his elbow as he dug around for his clipboard.
“You guys know what to do, three swim, one kick, and mobility. You got ten minutes to be in,” he announced, but quickly added, “I hope you guys had a good first day.”
“Where’s Carla?” a freshman asked.
“She’ll be here in fifteen, she’s still at her other job.”
Laura capped up and stood by the side of the pool with the older players as they stretched on the side while the freshmen dawdled. She spotted Carmilla zip up her own suit and stick to the corner of the pool to avoid getting run into by any players. Danny gave her a quick peck on the cheek before diving in, the others following suit. Griffith watched from the side of the pool as he counted his players. Once they got to their mobility routine, he began chucking water polo balls out to them and placed the polo caps on the side of the pool.
“Let’s start with groups of four, please try to mix it up. Show the new players how it’s done,” he reminded them.
Laura was quick to group up with her mentee and two other new players. She found the new Junior to be a reliable player. Her passes were perfect even when they weren’t and she seemed very focused on the sport, her eyes always following the ball. She stayed silent in a kind way from Laura’s perspective.
Carla pulled aside the Junior Varsity team while Griffith took them through their usual skills-based drills.
“I want to take a little pressure off of our centers this season, so our big scorers will be attackers. Mel, Riley, Emmy, you will serve as decoys, once the other team sees our outside players as threats, they’ll leave room for you to get the ball and score,” he assured them. “So, we’re going to be working on driving and being in constant motion.”
He explained the drill in depth with his whiteboard and let them make mistakes as they got into a flow. As practice came to a close, Griffith gathered the players to the wall and let Danny lead the Squire and Knight pairings. She repeated her spiel from the morning but detailed to the new players what their role in the pair was.
“You guys,” she began, “are free to ask us for help with classes or the sport. Whatever help you need, we are here for you. If anything happens between you or your mentor, or another, let me know and I will work to fix the problem,” Danny vowed. With the ground rules set, she began announcing the pairings.
Laura looked over at Carmilla who absent-mindedly played with her cap and goggles. Even after their pairing was revealed, she seemed unbothered and began packing up and changing once she was released while everyone else connected with their mentors. Laura hated to bother her but still approached.
“Hey, Karnstein,” she awkwardly greeted.
“Hey.” Carmilla brushed out her hair and wrung out the extra water before deck changing.
“I’m excited for the season. I know you’ve played for a while now, but if you want to know anything about our league or plays, just let me know, I’d be happy to help.”
“Sounds like a good trade-off, sweetie,” she mockingly smiled.
Laura furrowed her brows at the nickname but quickly fixed her face to smooth out the situation. “Um, well I’ll see you in class then.”
“Yeah.”
Laura nodded and grabbed her stuff as she waited for Danny to get ready. She tried not to be mad about the arrangement but she really was beginning to dislike the new player. Laura took her girlfriend’s hand as they walked to her car.
“What’s up?” Lawrence asked with a gentle shake of her hand.
“I’m just now sure how well Karnstein and I were matched. Is it too early to switch.”
“Yes,” she confirmed, “Just give it time. You know, we weren’t perfect at first.”
“True.”
Laura let out a quiet huff as she tossed her bags in the back seat. Danny fiddled with the radio until she found a station she knew Laura would enjoy. It did lift her spirits and they spent the brief drive singing along until Danny pulled up to the house three blocks away. They walked into the empty Hollis home where her dad left dinner in the fridge. Danny warmed up their meal while Laura hung up their suits.
“Are you still interested in hanging out with LaF?” Danny suggested.
“Yeah! Did you get any homework?”
“No, luckily. Only a list of what we’re gonna read, you?”
“Nothing yet.”
Danny grabbed some silverware but paused to ask, “... You wanna make out or eat?”
Laura placed her hands on her girlfriend’s waist, “Why not make out then eat?”
“Bed, couch, or counter?”
“My dad’s not here, so.” She let the last word trail off into nothing as she hopped onto the counter.
~~~~~~~~~~
Laura tried not to feel offended as the pre-season continued but she really could not get Carmilla to interact with her outside of the basic rules of the sport or during drills. She wasn’t sure what to do about it and couldn’t help but feel like she annoyed her, despite doing nothing. She even began receiving bogus passes from the athlete. She tried to look past it, she’d had days when her passes wouldn’t connect, but when Carmilla dropped point-scoring passes during team scrimmage, Laura decided she had had enough. She waited patiently even as Carmilla proceeded to cut off her drives and held her tongue.
Laura got out of the pool as quickly as possible once she was released to cool off before anyone could see her. She let the frustration get to her while she waited for Danny to join her.
“Dude, what’s going on?” she asked.
“I need you to give me a different Squire, Karnstein is impossible.”
“Okay, I’ll talk with her.”
“I don’t need you to play team mom, I just need to either let me out of the program or let me mentor a different player. She obviously doesn’t like me and I’m not going to let her ruin my season.”
“I get it, okay,” Danny snapped. “Are you still good to walk home?”
She curtly responded, “Yes.”
Danny stormed off to her car while Laura pulled her backpack on.
“Trouble in paradise, Creampuff?” she heard Carmilla tease.
“What the hell were those passes, Karnstein?”
“Excuse me?”
“Those shit passes, that’s what I’m talking about. I’ve seen you play, you’re not that bad,” she accused. “And what’s your problem with me, huh?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about?”
“Oh my god! I know this is your first year with us, but can you at least pretend to care about the team?”
That accusation immediately shattered Carmilla’s flippant demeanor. “You don’t get to say that. I do actually care, I just don’t like you, Hollis. And if you’re really keen to know, it’s your insatiable need to be liked. It’s like that’s what you live off of. You’re so self-centered! No wonder everyone gets tired of you. You don’t like that I’m also a good driver or that you’re suddenly not the only scorer on the team. So, fuck you.”
Laura was shocked by her words and shoved her out of frustration. Carmilla dropped her bag and sucker-punched her. Laura stumbled back and dropped her belongings as well to fight back. She shoved her again and aimed a slap at her face. It connected to the side of her jaw but failed to have any heft behind it like Carmilla’s hit. Fear tore through her body in a freezing regret as her teammate’s eyes filled with rage. In retaliation, Carmilla used all of her strength to shove her to the ground. She grabbed her bag as Danny and Griffith rushed to the scene and joined Matska in her car.
“What the hell was that!” Griffith yelled.
“Nothing.”
“Nothing my ass. We’re gonna talk about this tomorrow, Hollis.”
Danny picked up her girlfriend’s bag, “Come on, let’s go home.”
“Stop.” Laura snatched her backpack from her and followed. “I’ve got it.”
Silence burned between them as Danny avoided the subject but when she pulled into the driveway, she couldn’t help but bring it up. “What happened?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Well, I don’t want someone on the team who starts fights,” Danny tried to convince her. Laura turned away from her. “Please tell me.” After she refused to say anything, Danny turned off the car. “Um, I want to take a break, Laura. At least until I can get a handle on you and Karnstein, okay?”
“A break?” She scoffed. Laura grabbed her bag from the back and stepped out of the car. “Why not just end it.”
Danny jumped out to follow her, “What, no! That’s not what I mean! I don’t want to be biased when dealing with this whole thing.”
“Why can’t you be unbiased with me?”
“That’s not how things work,” she muttered. “Look, I wouldn’t suggest this if you hadn’t gotten in a fight, but now I have all of this shit to deal with and I do not want to rope the principal into this. I mean, you hit her kid, Laura, there’s no way to win.” She covered her eyes with her hand and let out a frustrated sigh. “We’ll talk about this later, okay? I’m going home.” Without waiting for an answer, she got in her car and left.
Laura just wanted to crawl into a hole and hide out for the rest of her life as she replayed the scene in her head. Her mom would have been pissed at her about the whole situation. She closed herself off in her room, narrowly avoiding her dad in the hallway, as she dove under the covers and buried her face in her pillow. She tried to work out how to repair her relationship with her girlfriend, even though she was still annoyed with her, and Carmilla. She couldn’t get over the disappointed look on Danny’s face and how much it pissed her off. She could understand where she was coming from, but it still felt too righteous for her to react that way.
Saving face through confrontation was the only way Laura could imagine fixing what she broke. So, when the next school day rolled around, Laura found herself face to face with Carmilla in her first period, but neither athlete uttered a sound. Only awkward glances were shared at the beginning and end of class. As slight as she was, Carmilla was an intimidating figure, especially after learning how well she could pack a punch, so the thought of talking to her after last night’s event felt impossible. At a certain point, Laura couldn’t recall the specifics of what she said, just that she acted irrationally to not being liked.
Karnstein was right, though, even Laura had to admit that not being seen as amicable made her feral. When Danny didn’t immediately think she was amazing and fun, she remembered forcing extra time with her before practice to ‘work on her shots’. Maybe it was that endearing attitude that drew them to each other. Danny had always been a little closed off to others, playing the broody goalkeeper until they began dating the previous Spring.
As lunch neared, Laura chose to avoid her friends. She really was not up for hanging out with Danny and if she really considered how she felt, she wasn’t all that heartbroken about the possibility of not being with her, as odd as it was to think. Instead, Laura meandered around the school grounds and ate until she spotted Carmilla sitting in the administration building. Curiosity and false bravery got the better of her so she entered the old building.
Carmilla looked unbothered by her presence, which made it harder for Laura to gauge how she should approach their impending conversation. Laura chose a brutally honest approach, she didn’t know the girl well enough to be sarcastic yet.
“Hey.”
“Hi,” Carmilla returned without any sense of apprehension.
“I’m sorry about yesterday. You are right,” she begrudgingly admitted.
Carmilla tried to stifle how intense her scoff was. “What?”
“You were right, Karnstein. I need to be liked, but I don’t do it to be mean to others, I genuinely like to be nice to people because it takes too much energy to be mean to me,” she explained. “I also don’t mean to be a ball hog. My freshman year, I was the only person who wasn’t afraid to score, so they always gave me the ball. You threw off my game and instead of adapting, I let it get to me.”
Carmilla cocked her head to the side and scooted to the edge of the bench. Laura immediately took the invitation to no one’s surprise and waited for her to talk. The other student let the silence settle until she could feel Laura become pensive and annoyed.
“I know,” she simply answered.
Laura furrowed her brows and opened her mouth only to get cut off.
“My job at Cresens was to annoy centers and draw ejections. I loved it,” she reminisced. “And you have been the easiest by far, Honey.”
“You’re such a little shit.”
“I know.”
“I know. And I know you know I know.”
Carmilla only chuckled in response and finally relaxed. Even though Laura didn’t completely understand what was so funny, she couldn’t help but laugh along.
“So, what are you doing in here?”
“Sitting.”
“Why aren’t you hanging out with your sister?” she clarified.
“Well, I’m probably gonna get chewed out by mommy dearest in a few minutes.”
“What, it wasn’t your fault, though?”
“Yeah, but there’s a reason why I’m here instead of Cesens.” Laura furrowed her brows at her flippant attitude. “Look, Sweetheart, it’s not that bad, so wipe that puppy dog look off your face.”
“Ughh, stop calling me that.”
“Don’t call me Karnstein,” she offered.
“Deal. Hey, do you want to blow off practice today?”
“I never thought I’d hear you say that. Aren’t you afraid it’ll look like you abandoned your team?”
“I’m doing this for the team.”
Carmilla scoffed at her and sighed. “Do you like tea?”
“I do, you wanna hit up that cafe down the street?”
“I haven’t been there yet, sure.”
Laura texted their coach about her plan. “I wish you good luck with your mom. I’ll see you out front after school.”
“Okay, do you do sporadic plans?”
“No, yes. Nothing big.”
The door opened to the looming figure of her mother. “Well, I’ll see you around.”
Laura watched her disappear and took it as her sign to leave as well before she overheard anything she wasn’t supposed to. The rest of her day was spent furiously jotting down notes in preparation for midterms until she was finally released. Laura stored all of her belongings in the gym lockers and jogged out front, narrowly avoiding her teammates and the pool, to meet Carmilla.
“There you are Hollis, was afraid you wouldn’t show up,” she joked.
“I got caught up in the wave. You ready to go?”
“Sure.”
They went against the flow of traffic, dodging and ducking through students until they could breathe. Carmilla pulled ahead a bit and took a shortcut through the neighborhood.
“I thought you’ve never been there?” Laura called after her as she jogged to catch up.
“I haven’t, but I’ve been meaning to go, so I know where it is.”
They wove through the suburban streets until they got back onto the main road where the cafe sat tucked in the corner of a strip mall. It was a little busy with a few students either frequenting or working at the establishment.
“What do you normally get?”
Carmilla looked over the menu until she found a style she enjoyed, “The chamomile looks good, that’s what I normally drink.”
They picked up their orders and found a spot slightly secluded to sit. Carmilla for the first time looked unsure as she glanced around the cafe. “So, are you planning to interrogate me to get on my good side or what?”
“I wouldn’t say interrogate,” she tried to assure her. “Now I’m remembering why I shoved you in the first place.”
“And I’m remembering that I won that fight.”
“Have you been in any other fights?”
“Not that weren’t in the water.”
“You got any scars from them?”
“Yeah,” Carmilla rolled up her sleeve to reveal a few nail marks on her forearm. “This was from JV champs. Some girl from Lucanus gave it to me. It was gnarly,” she laughed. “We still destroyed them. I got another one on my back from practicing in Hungary with some boys and then I fractured a rib last year.”
“How?”
“Someone kicked me real fuckin’ hard. What about you?”
“I actually don’t have a lot, just this,” she pointed at a scar from her clavicle to her chin. “Last year’s Cup in the Quarterfinals. I got stitches and had to sit out the rest of the tournament.”
“Impressive,” she nodded.“Anything else?”
“Nothing that stuck around. So, you mentioned you got kicked out of Cresens, how?”
“I didn’t get kicked out, I left. Big difference.”
“Why’d you leave?”
“That’s a story for another day,” she grinned and checked her watch. “If we want to go to practice and show everyone we can play nice, we should go now.” Carmilla grabbed her bag and waited for Laura to finish before heading back to campus.
As they walked back, Laura asked, “So, how do we make this work? I mean, I love scoring.”
“Share the ball? I don’t know, it’s kind of easy.”
“Easier said than done.”
“Not really, it’s pretty simple. Look around before you score. I mean, how often do you get one-v-goalie in a game?”
“It happens.”
“And yet you act like you’re the only person in the pool. Look at your centers, move the defense around like you would during club.”
Laura nodded as they got into the locker room. “Okay, I’ll look around.”
“Are you the top scorer on your club team?”
“I mean yeah, one of them. That’s why we do well.”
“Are you the only scorer?”
“No.”
“That’s why you do well. It’s not just you in the pool. Has Griffith never given you this speech?”
“Why would he? He likes that I win our games.”
“Yeah, sure,” she rolled her eyes. “I think he also likes that he has strong centers and a good goalie, not just you.” Laura furrowed her brows a little which made Carmilla laugh. “Wow, you should see your face. You really don’t like sharing the spotlight, do you? This is gonna be an interesting season!”
She grabbed her bag once she was ready for practice and left Laura in the locker room where she brooded in her suit until she could bring back her bubbly demeanor. Once she was on the pool deck, she joined Carmilla for a quick warm-up and kept her distance so she could watch her team’s dynamic without her. She really couldn’t see what the new player was on about. In the duration of her solely watching, she saw dropped balls, fumbling in set, and their backup goalie getting scored on. Carmilla was thrown into the fray so she studied how she shared the field.
Carmilla drove as she normally attempted, but without Laura in her way, she successfully pulled off a tip-in from Mel in set. On Defense, Hollis watched her split attackers like her and tear through them for a one-v-goalie with Danny. Normally at that point, Laura would attempt a goal, but Carmilla slowed her pace until the rest of her top-line attackers were with her. She quickly passed the ball to another player and took a spot on Danny’s weak side which drew the goalie towards her. When Carmilla finally received the ball, she immediately passed it to the player on the opposite side of the pool who scored an easy shot.
Laura jealously huffed in her corner as she watched Carmilla blend seamlessly in with her teammates. No one really stood out in the pool, yet her team pulled well ahead in the drill. When she came back to gloat, Laura could only nod along to her points.
“See, what I mean.”
“One thing you could improve on,” Hollis pointed out, “is talking. You are so silent in the pool which may make you an assassin, but obviously confuses your teammates. I saw you try to pull off that 4-3 play, but without someone vocally leading you guys, it turned south pretty fast.”
“Not every play will be perfect, but yeah, I don’t talk much. At all, really.”
“I see what you mean, though. I mean you looked good, Mel looked amazing, I mean, everyone you played with looked good.”
Carmilla knowingly nodded along to the praises. “So, what did you learn?”
“That I should share my toys with everyone,” she scoffed.
“Careful, if you look annoyed, people might not like you.”
“Don’t even joke about that,” she warned before swimming off to join the others for a quick debrief of practice before they started their scrimmage with the JV team.
Griffith mixed the players up but made sure to keep his problematic athletes together to avoid a fight breaking out in the water. He handed out caps and explained what he wanted to see and explained that he might stop gameplay to practice some concepts. Carmilla started in the sprinter position while Laura stuck to the opposite side of the pool where she was strongest. Once Carla blew the whistle everyone blasted off the wall and the sprinters came crashing into each other. Karnstein ripped the ball from Emily before her fingers even made contact with the ball and swung it across the pool to Laura.
Hollis almost immediately went to her normal routine until she heard Carmilla yell, “Four! Get it to Four!”
Laura glanced at Betty in her normal spot and debated handing it off to her but before she came to a decision, Mel stole the ball and began in the opposite direction. She chased after her and spotted Carmilla on her tail before she took over and swiped the ball from Mel. She passed it down the pool to a player near the goal and sprinted back up to meet her. Laura furiously followed but slowed up once she hit the midline of the pool as Carmilla and two other players made a move to score.
They lined back up in the middle, Carmilla taking the center spot while everyone else backed up to their defensive positions. With the next play starting, Griffith let the game run naturally. Carmilla began using her voice more as she was instructed, but Laura struggled to even want to touch the ball. As much as she wanted to improve, she subconsciously would rather be an inactive player than play with her teammates. After a few minutes, Laura and a few other players subbed out.
“You know, I didn’t mean don’t play,” Carmilla quietly explained.
“I know, I just don’t know how to do that.”
“Oh my god, you- I’m glad you’re trying,” she quickly encouraged.
“I’m so happy you’re proud of me.”
“Oh, I never said that. I’ll be happy when you can make a play instead of watching it happen in front of you.”
“Shut up.”
“Never.”
“You know, you’re really not as charming as you think you are.”
Carmilla laughed, “Okay.”
They silently watched the scrimmage as Griffith explained some plays he wanted to try. To test out his driving technique, he pulled Carmilla and Laura back in temporarily. “Hollis I want you at two, Karnstein, take Flora’s spot.” Once they were in position, he proceeded with the play. “Okay, so Hollis, go down to one. Karnstein, go to five. After that, both of you to cross up top at three. Hollis take the pocket in four and everyone else, slide over,” he explained.
They slowly went through the movements finishing with Laura in the pocket while Carmilla and the player up top slid over.
“Fine, that works. Since Laura will be looking to shoot, Karnstein and Ephran start moving to defense.”
Laura could almost feel Carmilla internally laugh as she made a move to swim back on defense. They ran through the play a few times with dummy defense before Griffith let them play, noting that he wanted them to work it in at some point. Laura did call the play and it did work, but for the first time, Laura didn’t want to be the center of the play. After the shot was made and they lined back up, she glanced at Carmilla and raised her hand.
“Hey, coach, what if you had Carmilla take my spot instead? She’s a lot faster so if she has to go back on defense, she’ll get there about as quick as me and Cali.”
“We can try it out,” he agreed.
Again, Laura felt the new player’s eyes upon her, still finding the situation humorous even though it went her way this time. They played a few more times, pushing and pulling movement of the ball until Laura called the play. She immediately went back on defense, still feeling unfulfilled about not scoring. She couldn’t help but feel like she was missing out but suppressed the emotion and instead worked to convince herself that she was strengthening her team with the tactic.
They were pulled out again with the second-string players taking their spot in the scrimmage while they rehydrated and watched. Carmilla stayed silent, but there was an innocent smugness in her silence that Laura liked. If giving people more opportunities to score shut her up, then Laura was more than glad to perform.
Once Griffith felt satisfied with his team, they wrapped up practice. Carmilla followed Laura around a little to help clean up much to Laura’s chagrin.
“Thanks for humoring me,” she simply stated.
“I hate it but it’s whatever.”
“Okay,” Carmilla chuckled. She nudged Laura with her elbow, “Come on, admit it, you loved seeing your friends happy.”
“Yeah, I did,” she agreed with a grin. They finished up their tasks and packed up with the rest of the team. “Do you want to hang out during lunch?”
“Instead of my sister’s cool friends?”
“Yeah.”
“Why not? They’re kinda intense, you know super goth. Too goth for me,” she jested.
“I still think you’re kind of annoying.”
“Thank you, and you’re still bothered about not being liked.”
“I got you to like me.”
Carmilla teased, “That’s still up for debate.”
~~~~~~~~~~
Laura worked hard the change her playing style and while she wasn’t used to being the main scoring player, she learned to enjoy assisting. Something about joining in on everyone’s joy felt nearly as exhilarating. As much as she hated to admit it, Carmilla was very beneficial to the team in ways Laura just held them back. Throughout the season and during their matches, they became an unstoppable force. While there were teams that gave them a hard time, Laura and Carmilla led them to victory. Even out of the water, Hollis learned how to focus on her teammates rather than feel sidelined or jibbed. Karnstein still pushed her buttons from time to time but she enjoyed her nihillistic jokes and observations.
It was in the locker room at an unfamiliar school for their League Championships that it all finally clicked for her. Every practice and game led them to where they were. It was exhilarating. While she played up with Varsity the previous year, there was a vastly different feeling about being there as a third year. She looked at herself in the mirror while her team chatted in the locker room.
“What are you feeling?” Danny asked her in their reflection.
“Like I’m ready but also a little anxious, I think? I never feel like this, but I feel it in my gut.”
She nodded gently and leaned against a bathroom stall. “I get that. Why do you feel like this?”
“I don’t know, I just - I’m ready I think I’m just excited.”
“Good, it’s a good feeling. That’s how I feel before every game.”
“How do you hide it?”
“I don’t. I let myself feel my feelings and that helps me play for our team. You ready to hit the deck?”
“I just need another minute,” she requested.
“Okay.”
She took another few breaths and looked at herself in the mirror where she spotted Carmilla watching her. They nodded at each other in the reflection but when she turned to truly look at her, Karnstein was already headed out to the pool deck. Laura took a quick breath and nodded to hype herself up as she left to join her team.
They went through their mobility and passes before working on their shots. Laura had to be on point, she needed to nail every pass and shot to prove to Griffith she deserved her starting position. All she saw was yellow, she focused on the ball’s movement and ignored the fakes. Her blocks kept getting dropped, but she couldn’t let it get to her. Laura erased the mistakes from her head like she always did.
They talked about their game plan back in their corner with Griffith and Laura could not be more sure of herself. Adrenaline rushed through her body as she and the others buzzed with excitement. For the first time since meeting her, Carmilla was silent. There was a deep focus in her eyes as she looked around the circle of starters including locking eyes with Danny and Laura for a moment. Danny stoically floated on a water polo ball until they dispersed to line up.
The crowd grew loud while barely a word was uttered between the Knights. Their green caps stuck out against the clear blue water while ripples and waves settled.
The whistle screeched and the players bolted off of the wall.
Laura hit her mark as Carmilla easily took the ball and swung it across to her partner. The opposing team settled into their defense as players crashed into each other to gain distance. They battled it out in constant motion for seven minutes without a point scored. They went back to their corners after the quarter to hydrate and talk.
Griffith subbed out most of the starting line up including Carmilla and Laura to let them rest with his larger stronger players to match the opposing team. While the starting lineup was quick, they couldn’t match the other athlete’s strength and immaculate passes. At a certain point in the first quarter, they could only block as the players were spread thin across the pool.
Mel led them through the second quarter with a penalty shot in the fourth minute before scoring once again with a tip-in pass from Carmilla in the sixth minute. Laura watched eagerly from the bench and cheered more than she ever could when Mel got the ball. She was a force when given the chance and matched with Carmilla, it took players camping on them to finally shut them down.
As the second half began, Laura took her position once again to work with Carmilla as they tore up the other team with their speed. They burst off of defense the moment Danny touched the ball and spread the top to confuse the opposing goalie.
The next two points they scored were solely from counter-attacks but their players began to get ejected. They suddenly had to be careful once Mel got her second ejection which meant Griffith would not play her unless he was certain she was necessary. With their best center defender out, Carmilla and Laura played safer but still lost three points to the opposing team. They closed out the play without another goal from either school and as the final quarter came and went, either the shot clock ran out or the ball went back to the goalie.
In a low-scoring game, Silas barely scraped through as Champions. The locker room was tense yet happy as the Knights changed and packed their belongings before heading onto the team bus to talk or sleep.
“That was amazing,” Laura finally said to Carmilla. “I mean, wow, really I just… wow.
They walked to their spot at the back of the bus and relaxed on the single cushioned bench with their backpacks tucked under the seats in front of them. The bus was nearly silent after the initial burst of energy when players fell asleep or watched a show on their phones. Carmilla and Laura played with a deck of cards, their game momentarily interrupted by the occasional bumps and shakes of the bus.
“You looked good,” Carmilla encouraged.
“And you were really quiet on the bench.”
“Maybe I was a little stressed, I mean I think that was one of our closest matches besides the one against that team from Graz.”
“Good stressed, though.”
“Not really, when I wasn’t in the water I felt useless and just wanted to speed past those girls. I knew I could.”
“Now who sounds a little selfish.”
“Well, I mean you’d be with me, too. And Cali of course.” Carmilla stacked the cards to shuffle the deck again.
“Do you wanna come to my house tonight? It’s closer than yours.”
“Yeah.”
“Cool!”
Carmilla split the deck for the next round of speed. After their next round, Carmilla put the playing cards away so they could sleep for the last fifteen minutes of the drive. When they came to a complete stop, they waited for their teammates to move before they joined Danny in her car. They blasted music to stay awake for the brief ride.
“Thanks, Danny,” Laura nodded as they slumped inside while their teammate drove off.
They dropped their bags at the door and hung up their suits before they finally fell on Laura’s bed.
“Oh my god, my body hurts,” Carmilla groaned.
She turned to look at her. “But you’re not tired, right?”
“Not yet.”
They looked at each other in silence while Laura tried to figure out what to do. She turned on her radio and fell back on the bed.
“You wanted to know about what happened at Cresens?” Carmilla asked over the music.
Laura turned it down and sat up, a position her teammate copied. “Well yeah, but that doesn’t really matter now, you know.”
“I want you to know.” She looked around the room a little and began her story, “When I was at Cresens, my mom found out I was dating someone and she didn’t like it at all, so she told me I could either leave Cresens or leave the house.”
“But you’re so young?”
“I could find a place but I thought it’d be easier to go along with what she said. And now you’re looking at me like I’m a sad puppy dog. I’m not.”
“Are you not… are you gay?”
“Yes, I am very gay but not practicing,” she laughed.
“You could always stay with me? I mean, my dad took in LaF when they first came out.”
“As much as I do not agree with my mother, she is my mom and I do love her. I do, I never need to convince myself of that and if this is the only thing I can do to keep her in my life then I will until College. Then I can do whatever I want.”
“Does that make you happy?”
“No, but my friendships do, and my siblings, too. They didn’t rat me out, she did, Elle, the girl. She didn’t think it was a big deal or maybe she thought she could change my mom, but she made my life dangerous and scary for a few months there.”
“I’m so sorry you have to go through that.”
Carmilla merely shrugged.
“So, what are you doing in the Spring?”
“Swim, I’m more of a swimmer, I only do water polo to stay busy and practice sprinting.”
“You sure you wouldn’t want to play club with me?” Laura offered.
“Yes, as much as I like water polo, I love swim.”
“What are you doing winter break?”
“Um, family stuff mostly with Matska and a trip to Poland to visit family.”
“We should meet up sometime?”
“That’d be great. Are you swimming?”
“Yeah, but I’ll mostly be focused on club, so I probably won’t be at every practice.”
They crashed on the bed not much later and slept well into the morning before Laura woke up. “Hey you,” she nudged Carmilla. “Do you want to go to the park?”
“Sounds nice, my legs still hurt, I don’t think I’ve swum that hard in water polo. Those girls were no joke.”
“Can’t be if they want to be as good as us.”
Carmilla stretched and got ready. “What time?”
“An hour? Hey,” she called after her. “Don’t use my toothbrush! There’s one in the cabinet.”
“Yeah yeah, I don’t want your gross mouth germs anyway.”
Once they had finished, the athletes grabbed a blanket and a soccer ball before saying goodbye to Mr. Hollis.
“What’s that for?” Carmilla asked.
“So we can play a little.”
“I am so bad at soccer, that’s why I swim.”
“Okay, I’m still bringing it.”
“Of course you are.”
“Where are you two off to?” They heard LaFontaine ask from a block away.
Laura turned to Lola and them lounging in LaFontaine’s front yard. “Hey! We’re going to the park, you wanna join?”
“Oh, yeah, for sure! Congrats again on the win! That was a nail-biter.”
“You’re telling me, it was probably one of the best games I’ve played, though.”
They continued walking toward the park. “We’ll probably stay a little while,” Lola informed them. “We’re going to pick something up to eat.”
“Okay, hey LaF, you wanna play a little soccer, Carm says she’s no good.”
“Sure.”
Their banter faded due to the loud traffic as they crossed a major road to the park. Laura found a spot under a tree to set up their blanket where Lola and Carmilla sat while the other two played with the soccer ball. Laura juggled the ball on her foot a little before passing it to her friend.
“So, anything happen with Carmilla?”
“What do you mean?” Laura inquired.
“I’m just curious.”
“For Danny, right? No, Carm and I are just friends, okay? You know, I’m just not ready or interested in dating.”
“Okay, but I wasn’t asking for Danny. She’s moved on, that’s for sure.”
“What?” Laura asked stopping the ball.
“Yeah, you didn’t hear? She’s got something with this girl from St. Michel. They met at Bora Bora… she was at the game yesterday and Danny kissed her. Did you not notice?”
“No, I don’t really think about her much outside of sports, honestly. Maybe in the future.”
“Oh, well can you pass the ball?”
“Yeah.”
They continued to pass and perform tricks, trying to one-up each other. As they shifted around in a circle to catch the ball before it dropped, Laura caught a glimpse of Lola and Carmilla talking about something that seemed to annoy the latter. Laura dropped the ball to the sound of LaFontaine comically groaning.
“Hey, LaF, we should get some food before it gets too crowded at Hadburg’s.” Perry called out. LaFontaine gave their friend one final pass and jogged to catch up to her.
Laura returned to Carmilla, nudging her with the ball. “What’s up?”
“Nothing really?”
Laura played with the ball a little, “I just thought that maybe Perry said something that might have upset you. You looked annoyed at something.”
“I think that’s just my face, honest mistake.”
“You wanna learn some ball-handling skills?”
“Why not?”
Carmilla followed her in the shade where they began passing the ball a little. While her skills weren’t strong she was decent at passing.
“I told you, I’m not that good.”
“I mean, you’re no Ronaldo, but you’re better than a wall.”
“How?”
“It takes a little bit of finessing to give you the ball.”
“Is that an insult or a compliment?”
“I mean, what do you think?”
Carmilla messed up a pass to her, “I’m so not good at this.”
“At least I’m better at something.”
They practiced a little more before they ultimately packed up the blanket to head home. They took the loud streets back until they finally got to Hollis’ house.
“So, what are your plans since the season’s over?”
“I don’t know,” Laura shrugged.
“Do you want to study in the library after class?”
“I’d like that!”
They sat in Hollis’ side yard until Matska drove around to pick her sister up.
“LaF asked if we were a thing,” Laura suddenly admitted.
Carmilla visibly reacted to the statement and laid back on the grass.
“I mean, that’s weird, right?”
“Yeah. You’re a little too self-centered for me.”
“Because there’s only room for one inflated ego in your life?”
“Yup, you know me. Besides, you’re too bubbly for me.”
Laura chuckled a little at the good-natured ribbing. “I can’t believe I didn’t like you, or I guess I can, but… I don’t think I could imagine my life without you.”
“I really made that big of an impact, did I?”
“Yeah.”
“You’ve really made my year, Hollis. I probably would have lost my mind if we didn’t meet.”
“What does that mean?” she joked.
“I like you Laura um, like a lot. I’m bad at this.”
“I mean, I’d have to consider how I feel because of you Mom. I don’t want you to get in trouble. And if she found out, I don’t think I could take losing you somehow.”
“Yeah, I guess that doesn’t really help this. I really shouldn’t have said anything,” she awkwardly laughed.
Laura took her hand and immediately Carmilla’s face softened, all defenses dropped. “I’m um, I don’t know what to say.”
Carmilla played with their hands a little. “I just don’t want anything to be weird, you know?”
Laura swooped in and kissed her. She kept her hand pressed gently on the side of Carmilla’s neck while the latter strained up on her elbows. Laura pulled away with her hand now on her teammate’s clavicle to keep her pressed against the lawn.
Carmilla bolted up into a seated position and pulled Laura in again for a passionate and unpracticed kiss that felt messy and desperate. Laura wasn’t sure when she would ever get this chance again in the odd situation they were in so she grabbed a handful of her collar to keep her close while Carmilla intertwined their legs.
Laura pulled away to brush the tip of her nose against her friend’s cheek. “I’ll go your pace, Carm.”
At that promise, they collided again in a blurry-faced kiss full of heat and passion until it burned out from fatigue and they stared silently at each other. They heard a car approaching so Laura rolled onto her back but kept their hands intertwined. She loved how Karnstein fidgeted with her fingers and traced the underside of her knuckles with her thumb nail before her sister pulled up.