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Children didn't like Vegas. He was absoloutely certain of it. It was the reason he took months of effort to be able to put Venice to sleep -something he wouldn't be caught dead admitting-.
He had taken responsibility though, for his brother, along with Pete and he intended to go all out on it. Perhaps it had something to do with his father. Some nights he would lay awake, stroking Pete's hair, thinking about it. About how terrified he was of being for Venice what his own father had been for him. It wasn't a far fetched thought even. There were still bad days, days when he felt too big for his own skin, felt his hands itching to break something, and the thought of that somethimg being a person he loved was horrifying. And it stung.
It stung when he watched Pete and Macau be so carefree, so happy around small, fragile Venice. It stung whenever Venice cried aroumd him and his first thought was to silwnce him, in fear of his father walking around the corner. His ghosts were too present for Vegas to actively attempt spending time alone with the youngest Theerapanyakun more than he had to, especially now that the small demon had figured out it had legs and wanted to use them to explore the world. The day he had to, though, was sure to come. And, surely enough, it did.
It was a tuesday afternoon. Macau was out with friends and Pete had errands to run. Vegas had assumed a nanny would take over, but that thought disperesed as soon as Pete sat down next to him with determined eyes. It wasn't that Vegas didn't want to be actively involved. He just didn't want to be involved alone when it was possible.
"Could you watch Venice for a few hours while I'm gone?" Vegas put his book aside. It wasn't a question, not really. He was going to do it. Still, he tried.
"Can't a nanny do it...?" Pete straightened him with a look.
"You need to stop being afraid around Venice, love. If we're going to do this, I need you with me every step of the way." The worst thing was that he was right. Vegas knew it. He sighed, raising his hand to touch Pete's cheek. Pete nuzzled against it.
"I'll try, Pete. That's what I promised." Pete kissed the inside of his wrist with a smile.
"You don't have to worry so much. You just have to watch him when he tries to climb on furniture." They both huffed out a laugh.
"And if you need anything, I'm always one simple call away, okay?" Vegas withdrew his hand. Despite it being given, Pete assuring him he would always be within reach helped settle his nerves.
Pete made to get up, Vegas following him towards the nursery.
Pete kissed Venice, who was playing with one of his monstrosities of a toy ("Of course it's good for babies Vegas, I'm sure" Pete had assured a dubious Vegas), on the forhead, leaving Vegas alone then, with a kiss on his lips before he could change his mind.
Just like that, Vegas was alone, the only sounds in the room those of the bells on the damn toy - why the fuck did it also have bells?- and Venice's babbling. Vegas sat down in one of the chairs with his book. This was going to be a long few hours. He even managed to tune the toy's sound out, he was getting good at this. That was until Venice got bored.
Venice threw his toy away, starting to crawl towards Vegas, which drew him out of his book. He didn't make a move, not sure about how to handle it, but the little devil had other plans. Once he reached Vegas' feet he started climbing up, with no self preservation instincts whatsoever.
Vegas; instincts kicked in as Venice started falling, catching him and taking him in his arms.
"You're really trying to go places huh?" Staring into the baby's eyes, the only answer he recieved was a giggle and some spit.
"Well, you have to learn how to walk first, then." The thought that crossed Vegas' mind had him uncertain at first, but what the hell, he had dealt with drug lords, mafia from around the world, bullets, he could handle helping a baby walk.
Settling Venice on his feet, he held him up by his arms. Pete had told him he'd done this a few times before. Venice laughed as he kicked his legs, stumbling around the room. This was easy. But it got tiring quickly. Vegas wanted to try something else. He picked up Venice again as he sat down crosslegged, setting the baby down about a meter in front of him. He opened his arms like he'd seen parents in movies do. Venice recognized the gesture, if him instantly dropping down and crawling to Vegas was any sign. Well, he had to try again. Vegas set him on his feet away from him again. Venice didn't seem to like that. Vegas didn't either.
Many tries later, both of them were tired. Vegas had started to thimk this was a bad idea. He had almost given up, it was just like when he had taught Macau how to ride a bike. He just kept falling, getting mad at Vegas after a few tries. That was when Venice decided he was finally a functional human and took his first step. Wobbly and uncertain, but a step nonetheless. Vegas' eyes widened, a smile crossed his face. Venice was walking! He was there for his first steps! He had helped with them!
The baby reached him and fell into his arms. Vegas was excited enough to raise him and kiss him on the face, earning him a delighted sound.
"Look at you walking! Soon enough we'll have to babyproof the whole house. Oh, Pete will be extatic when he sees you!" He fished his phone from his pocket and started recording.He set Venice back again.
"Can you do that one more time? Come on, I know you can. " Venice could, proving it right away. He refused to do anything else though, tears springing to his eys after he reached Vegas again, his little legs already tired. Vegas stopped recording, put his phone aside and tried to deal with the crying baby. Pete had told him what to do if Venice cried so he set about exploring his options, too happy to freak out or think about it.
About two hours later Pete was back. He had tried to be as quick as possible, and he was almost certain everything would be okay when he came back. Vegas hadn't called, but that didn't mean much considering the man's pride. As he entered the house, he noticed the quiet, especially the closer he got to Venice's room. Maybe Venice was asleep despite it not being nap time. Pete slowly opened the door and was both taken aback and heartwarmed at the sight in front of him. Vegas was craddling Venice in his chest, both asleep. He quickly took a picture and left the room again, not wanting to disturb what was a bonding moment and a huge step for Vegas. Later that night, after the fanfair of celebrating Venice's first steps, a lot of pictures, videos and smiles, Vegas found himself lying in Pete's arms. Venice had been put to sleep a while earlier, and, for the first time that afternoon, Vegas haf time to think. Pete seemed to hear his loud thoughts, practically even reading them in the way his breaths came. "Do you want to talk about it?" An offer, not binding. Vegas had learned to talk about his feelings more and more, but even if he hadn't, he could never hide anything from his lover. "It's just...I got excited today, when Venice took his first step." He said to the ceiling, too embarassed to be looking at Pete. The hand in his hair never stopped stroking, never even stuttered. "That's a good thing though. Why are you unsettled by it?" The question was kind, blue sky among storm clouds. "You know, dad never told us about our first steps. Actually, he wasn't really ther for most of our firsts. I have no memory of him being this happy either for me or Macau. I was just wondering... Is this reaction normal? Was it the right one?" Before he could finish his sentence, Pete tightened his hold on him. The gesture grounding him made him realize how distant he felt from his talking self. "Your reaction was perfectly normal, love. In fact, I'm proud of you for today, for everything. I know it isn't easy for you. It isn't easy for me either, but we're in this together. Venice will have a great life, surrounded by people who love him." Pete couldn't know that. Still, Vegas hummed in response, ending their conversation for the night. But maybe he was right. Maybe Venice would have a better childhood than them. Maybe he would be there for his firsts, he could even help with them. With that thought he falls asleep, leaving the worrying for tomorrow.