Work Text:
Faraway Town is, as the name suggests, far away. To get to restaurants or fast food places you'd have to drive a good 30-50 minutes.
Sunny spent his days in his mind, everyday was a repeat. Sometimes, at rare moments, he would whip out his iPhone 6 and go through Google Maps. Places he could be in, rather than his very lonely room. Sunny was supposed to leave Faraway Town though, his mother would remind him everyday of the nearing moving date. This was a major reason on why Sunny was so determined to feel alive once again. Even if he could have plenty more opportunities in the new town.
On one particular day, Sunny was feeling rather adventurous. He couldn't explain why, but he just felt like he had to go somewhere for steak. It was an animalistic urge, something he HAD to do. Today, Sunny didn't want to get cold steak from his house. Today, he wanted cold steak from somewhere else.
Sunny immediately went to Google Maps to see any possible places he could whisk in to order steak. Applebee's... Red Robin...
What the fuck? Why were all these places nearest to him so goddamn bluepilled?
"So bluepilled." He said, as if seeing the narration.
It took a while, but he finally settled on Olive Garden. Originally he had wanted some Outback Steakhouse, it literally had steak in the name! However, it was just too far. Maybe one day Sunny, maybe one day. But for now, Olive Garden would have to do, it was the nearest place to him and nothing could go wrong with that. He knew he should have a better plan. You can't simply enter an Olive Garden. You need money. It took a bit of thinking before Sunny decided that he could just improvise, maybe sneak it out. It was a shitty place anyway, if anything, would it really be that bad if he took one piece of steak?
It was early in the morning and Sunny was ready to inact his plan. He snuck out the window, stealth mode, to prevent being seen.
A few minutes after he immediately broke stealth mode to carjack some random idiot who left his car keys in the front car door.
Sunny was not a bad person by any means, he was just incredibly dehydrated and in need of steak from the outside. Sunny entered and started the car. It took him a few minutes to actually carjack it, as much as he wouldn't like to admit. Before he started the car he took a good 5 minutes to think about his actions. Was he really down to complete this devious plan? Was he really going to drive miles for steak? Was he really stealing a car for said steak? Hell yeah! He cranked the starter and immediately drove as to create comedic timing, but accidentally crashed into porch of the house.
Well, he's 16! He'll get the hang of driving after a while. Okay, rewind, nothing much you can do for the porch. Sunny finally drove out and went into the road, out of Faraway Town, and into the nearest Olive Garden.
...
After a while was not enough.
He had definitely broken several traffic laws. The road was empty, but all of the road signs you could see were crashed and destroyed, and the Faraway Town police were bad enough, it was free reign. If only he could jump out and break into other cars he'd be the king of the real-life version of GTA.
His iPhone 6 could only hold so much charge, last time he checked it was around 80%, now it stuck to a 30%. Sunny was starting to get anxious, he wouldn't know how to return home. To preserve battery, he bullshitted his way and guessed at any turns.
Somehow, possibly because of plot relevance, he checked Google Maps once more and he was right on track. He turned it off and memorized the next road only to be met with the fact he hadn't actually given the car gas. Well Sunny, running it is. He used the last of the gas to ride it off a ditch, while he jumped out at the last second like a badass.
After what felt like hours, he ran (as fast as he could) down the road to the Olive Garden. Sunny contemplates all the ways he could've dome this better or avoided it in general.
He got into the parking lot and looked around, there were barely any cars around (as expected from this place, especially with the pretty far location.
"Awesome sauce." Sunny monotonely declared. This was the happiest he's been in years.
Sunny entered the Olive Garden and went his way to the counter, he figured this place must run like that McDonald's he went to years ago. After quickly scanning the place, he saw that there were about 4 people actually eating here. Sunny took this moment to give those poor souls a moment of silence on whatever choices they made to be here.
He approached the person working in the counter, they had a cap on that hid their eyes, it was hard to note anything until the cashier gave Sunny a big smile and said, "Welcome to Olive Garden! When you're here, you're family! What would you like to order today?"
So he WAS right, this Olive Garden was like a McDonald's! He took these 3 seconds to praise himself before looking at the cashier once again. Sunny had forgotten. but he never planned to take or spend cash. So how else would he get his steak? Well, he was prepared,
Sunny whipped out a glock and said "Steak..."
Was this a smart move for Sunny? Not at all. In fact, he wasn't supposed to gun the place at all unless it was a final resort. But he didn't have any cash on him and his adrenaline was kicking in so he figured it would be the next best thing.
The cashier's smile was wiped, however there were no visible indications that they felt like they were in danger. It was an odd sight.
"...Make it cold." He continued, looking for any changes in the cashier's face.
They didn't say anything for a while, but then went to the kitchen, where Sunny assumed the limited staff was making his steak. "Great! This was easier than I thought!" Sunny thought. After a few minutes of anticipation, the steak was delivered to him. The cashier even personally handed it to him, he could finally return with steak!
Or so he thought.
The cashier took this opportunity of vulnerability to kick Sunny in the stomach. Sunny was quite surprised, as not only was it unexpected, but the kick itself wasn't very hard. After seeing him down, the customers ran out of the restaurant, he even saw some of the staff go out.
After an awkward moment of silence, the cashier said, "I only did this to remove you from your weapon, please stay grounded, I need-"
But Sunny didn't listen, he said, "I will not succumb to you." And sprinted out, not without grabbing the steak with him.
Of course, the mysterious cashier just kept following him. At this point they were both out of the Olive Garden. Sunny assumed it was to fight, and he would fight for that steak.
Sunny may not have his glock on him, but he has his limbs. Maybe he isn't as experienced as the cashier, but maybe he would have a chance.
"Sir, you're aware that you just robbed this place, right?"
Sunny slowly nodded.
"Look, I don't want to fight you, you're clearly young, about 16 years old I'd say..."
Sunny charged and they swiftly blocked his punches, eventually retaliating.
Clearly he wasn't landing pretty effective punches, the cashier at one point just facepalmed, as if they were disappointed. This only made Sunny more enraged and determined to win.
Sunny couldn't finish his thought process though, as the cashier punched him so hard he landed back and his nose started bleeding.
He cupped his nose and the cashier surprisingly (by his standards) apologized profusely, however that seemed to be the last steaw for Sunny.
"Okay, this was a war then." Sunny, you started this, what are you saying. It was too late to reason with him, he seems to be on alpha mode.
Sunny dug into his shorts and took out a conveniently placed grenade, instead of throwing it at the Olive Garden cashier, he missed so badly it hit the Olive Garden itself. You could only hope all the staff got out, but they probably did because of how short-staffed they were in the first place. This of course didn't end the fight and they both had a legendary battle whilst the Olive Garden burned behind them. If you were there, you'd probably hear fighting music.
The place went up in flames, it was in shambles and pieces of the Olive Garden were falling from the sky. At one point a particularly large piece had flown its way to Sunny.
He instinctively put his arms in his face but the cashier dove in to save his life.
"What the fuck" Sunny asked, the rage now combining with confusion.
Sunny felt as if this fight was unfair, so he sat down on the ground as a form of surrendering.
With a groan of pain he said, "Well, I guess when you're there, you're family.."
Sunny looked up at this mysterious person who you totally can't guess who it is.
Before Sunny could finish his sentence, had he ever planned to, the elusive cashier said, "Well actually... we are always family, Sunny."
They took of their hat, revealing the hair they'd been... keeping secret... and... HOLY SHIT IT'S MARI.
"Holy shit it's Mari." Thanks, Sunny.
Mari went closer, this time without any violent urges between Sunny.
Sunny cried for a while, it was a very long hug.
"But... I thought... my violin... your casket..."
Mari shrugged, "That was a really good prank."
Sunny's jaw dropped. So did Something's, who was just watching everything from the background.
"How are we supposed to tell everyone that you're alive?" Sunny questioned after recovering slightly from shock.
This took longer to answer. Mari thought for a while and said, "No idea."
Then Mari brought Sunny into a hug, which made Something get absolutely destroyed.
As Mari and Sunny walked together to Faraway Town with Mari's iPhone 7 to navigate, Sunny only had one more question.
"So, what about the steak?"
"Sunny, we have steak at home."
They walked onto the sunset, because this ordeal took the entire day to resolve.